Alabama Loses Yet Another Fight to Remain in Eighteenth Century - reported by Borowitz

[Mira]

MONTGOMERY, Ala. (The Borowitz Report)—On Monday, the state of Alabama lost yet another fight to remain in the eighteenth century, extending a losing streak that dates back to the nineteenth century.

Alabama, whose first attempt to remain in the eighteenth century took place between 1861 and 1865, has never shown signs of giving up the fight, even after being dealt a string of stunning defeats in the nineteen-fifties and nineteen-sixties.According to historians, Monday’s loss brings the number of failed attempts by Alabama to more than four thousand.

But even with this latest defeat, some of the state’s residents, such as Chief Justice Roy Moore, of the Alabama Supreme Court, remained resolute in their fight to return to a time before electricity and indoor plumbing.

“The United States Supreme Court has decided that it is the twenty-first century,” Moore said on Monday. “I say, ‘Not in Alabama, it isn’t.’ ”



www.borowitzreport.com

[randys1]

1. Michelangelo Signorile of Sirius interviewed this pile of human feces a while back

and replayed it today, parts of it.

He takes bits and pieces from the constitution, old English law and so on to create new law in his head to justify hatred of Gay people.

Of course all of his decisions have nothing to do with the actual law, and solely to do with his personal, warped, fucked up view of life in general.

He is an embarrassment to the human community.

[dixiegrrrrl]

2. Wonder of wonders, there is some push back against him in the state papers.

He does George Wallace proud, don't he?

As of today, some counties are issuing licenses and marrying couples
Some counties are not doing either
some counties are issuing licenses but not marrying anyone
Some counties are taking applications for licenses but not issuing any licenses. ( including mine...grrr)

Here is an interactive map that tells which counties are doing what in Ala:
http://www.al.com/news/index.ssf/2015/02/see_if_your_county_is_issuing.html#incart_big-photo

[randys1]

3. Guys like him hate the law and the people and will defy the court

or government like that pile of human feces sheriff in Arizona, whatever his name is, with immigration

I would like to arrest people like them and indict them for something really good, maybe we can get "Better Call Saul" as our prosecutor

[Cali_Democrat]

4. I don't think there's a more brilliant satirist than Borowitz...

[longship]

5. Well, there is South Park and The Onion. Plus Stewart and Colbert.

But Borowitz is certainly amongst the top of the top.

I love satire because so many GOP narratives are solely worthy of ridicule. In other words, there is plenty of room at the bottom, so to speak.

R&

My regards.