Obama Declares National Day of Gloating
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Residents of the District of Columbia were roused from their sleep by a massive fireworks display over the White House just after midnight, as President Obama declared what he called “a national day of gloating.”
“It would not be productive for this nation, going forward, to crow about our victory over political adversaries,” he said in a nationally televised address. “So let’s get it all out of our systems today.”
Immediately after the President’s speech, loudspeakers outside the White House blasted “We Are the Champions,” and the national day of gloating began.
In addition to a ticker-tape parade, the day’s events will include a screening on the Mall of a clip reel of Texas Senator Ted Cruz’s marathon Senate speech, punctuated by sad trombone sounds.
READ MORE: http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/obama-declares-national-day-of-gloating
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They were green from mold. My fondest wish is he has diarrhea for 24 hours. We already know he has diarrhea of the mouth.
randys~
"In addition to a ticker-tape parade, the day’s events will include a screening on the Mall of a clip reel of Texas Senator Ted Cruz’s marathon Senate speech, punctuated by sad trombone sounds."
I offer my grandson, the most talented young trombone player in the world, my world for sure!
"I offer my grandson, the most talented young trombone player in the world, my world for sure!" I say this, as the grandfather of the most beautiful girl in the world 
LOLGOP @LOLGOP
So heartwarming to see Republicans consoling themselves over the bad news that thousands of people won't go bankrupt if they get sick.
5:09 AM - 25 Jun 2015
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http://theobamadiary.com/2015/06/25/yes-3/
mahalo gitm!