Here Is The Perfect Teabagger Socialist-Free Purity Pledge
All of us know “that guy.” He might be a crazy uncle, an annoying co-worker, or that one person who shows up at all the parties and tells you about the merits of the gold standard for currency.
They hate government, they hate everyone else, they might even hate themselves. They are the Teabaggers.
Here is the perfect pledge to make them read aloud and then sign in front of everyone present at any discussion, gathering, rally, or other such gathering of more than just themselves talking to the TV. There is nothing more I can add to this perfect document, so I present it to you now:
I, ________________________, do solemnly swear to uphold the principles of a socialism-free society and heretofore pledge my word that I shall strictly adhere to the following:
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