Borowitz: Moving Vans Arrive At White House To Remove All Traces Of Competence, Dignity

[spanone]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Moving vans arrived at the White House on Wednesday to remove all traces of competence and dignity.

Working around the clock, movers started clearing out the optimism and progress that had accumulated during the past eight years.

“Once we’ve packed up that stuff, we’ll start moving out the wisdom and maturity,” one of the movers said. “The guy who’s moving in wants all of that gone.”

After the movers complete their work, a cleaning crew will come in and scrub the White House of every last speck of compassion.

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/moving-vans-arrive-at-white-house-to-remove-all-traces-of-competence-dignity?mbid=nl_011817%20Borowitz%20Newsletter%20(1)&CNDID=13562008&spMailingID=10253716&spUserID=MTMzMTc5NTg5MjQ3S0&spJobID=1081486665&spReportId=MTA4MTQ4NjY2NQS2

[fleur-de-lisa]

1. Andy Borowitz is the best

political satirist around! Nails it every time!

[progressoid]

2. I wish that was funny.

[Pacifist Patriot]

16. Right there with you.

[etherealtruth]

21. Yep :-(

[spanone]

28. i'm with ya!

8~(

[Wounded Bear]

3. Humor these days all too often gives me a sad...

[shenmue]

25. Awwww

[longship]

4. Andy Borowitz!

Sometimes satire makes me sad. It so often tells a brutal truth.

R&

[lastlib]

30. "...And Class. AND Intellect."

[Eliot Rosewater]

5. We are living a nightmare and seems no way to wake up.

Usually in an instance like this you could look to comedians for relief, comic relief.

But you will note this is not really happening, take Stephen Colbert for instance. He cant find a way to make people laugh over this situation because what is happening is not funny and all too real and scary.

The joke is on us, and until 3rd party voters admit they made a mistake and until trump followers do as well, we can expect this to actually get worse

[Akamai]

31. and until the mainstream press start selling the truth--that the country is liberal,

and wants liberal programs, such as: no more foreign wars, increasing taxes on the richest of us, climate change improvement, women's rights in work and over their bodies, etc.

Now the press is celebrating Trump, but his views are in the minority of the views of the country. The country is progressive and the mainstream media is lying (by omission) about it, or even lying directly about it. (And also, look at the bright, shiny object over there.)

we need a media that does not lie to us, and a Channel on cable TV that addresses these issues.

The first really progressive Channel on cable TV is going to attract a hell of a lot of viewers, including me and my far, far better half.

[saidsimplesimon]

37. Please, not funny, imo

It wasn't third party voters, it was those who did not vote. It is no joke. Do not tell others about "their mistake", accept the failures of those who did not stand up for our values during President Obama's term. If we fail to do so, we are doomed to repeat the Clinton errors, imo.

[Eliot Rosewater]

38. clockwork

[bullwinkle428]

6. K&R. I laugh to keep from crying these days.

[democratisphere]

7. When will the fake gold quilded Indonesian manufactured

furniture be delivered to the WH?

[BlancheSplanchnik]

8. Why am I crying instead of laughing?

[tenorly]

9. And although that photo is from the Clintons' last week in the White House, it applies just as well.

We all remember the long national - and international - nightmare that followed once the Clintons left office.

[Gothmog]

10. I love good satire

[malaise]

11. Most excellent

[calimary]

12. That'd be funny if it weren't true.

[Stellar]

13. "Removing all trace of competence and dignity."

Now I've got to go back to not sleeping nights like it was 7 - 8 yrs ago.

[Hekate]

14. KnR with a lump in my throat

Yeah, I haz a sad all right

[TygrBright]

15. I wish this were funny. n/t

[BobTheSubgenius]

17. Wow. Talk about comedy with an edge.

You could shave with it. First sentence, it was funny, but less so as it went on, at least for me. I grew more and more nostalgic with each word.

[BobTheSubgenius]

18. Oh, my.

When I 'entered' my comment, the confirmation page had a banner ad....for a moving company.

A little too on-the-nose.

[Scurrilous]

19. K & R

[world wide wally]

20. I still can't understand how America survived for 240 years when we have to surrender to a clown

like this and his Russian bullldog

[bdamomma]

33. They believed his BS

they were conned and he will be laughing all the way to the Bank unless Putin gets him on something like a video showing up.

[Cryptoad]

22. Making room for those Black Velvet Painting,,,,,,,,

[Different Drummer]

23. Sadly, there is more truth than humor in this. n/t

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

24. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!

[delisen]

26. This is funny! n/t

[milestogo]

27. Bring on the Russian hookers and underage girls!

[malaise]

29. I don't see Groper Don the Con sleeping there

I'm worried for the house

[spanone]

32. if he stays out, the house will be better for it......

🍷

[bdamomma]

34. exactly

that is the Peoples house, I wish they would remove all historical paintings and furnishings. He would probably sell them.

[malaise]

36. Very good point

[AgadorSparticus]

35. Funny...but it does sting a bit