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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsThe Kushner Family Passover Haggadah
Welcome to our Passover Seder! The history of the Jewish people reaches back nearly 4,000 years. We began as slaves in the land of Egypt but today we are free. As we recline in the luxury of freedom in our new Kalorama mansion, let us not forget our white Christian brothers and sisters yearning for release from bondage. We remember the baker forced to bake for every wedding and the ovum oppressed by its mothers womb. May this Seder inspire us to light the torch of liberty and burn anyone who stands in our way. Thus we begin with the lighting of the candles.
KIDDUSH BLESSING OVER THE WINE
Next, we recite the blessing over the wine, given to us from Eric Trump Winery, the largest winery on the East Coast. This wine symbolizes the sweetness of a wealthy father and the joy we feel when we are all together, with the exception of Melania who prefers to stay in New York. Amen.
PARSLEY
The parsley on our Seder plate reminds us of spring and the earths natural bounty, which does not need cumbersome government regulations. We dip the parsley into salt water representing the bitterness of liberal tears. Then eat.
KIDDUSH BLESSING OVER THE WINE
Next, we recite the blessing over the wine, given to us from Eric Trump Winery, the largest winery on the East Coast. This wine symbolizes the sweetness of a wealthy father and the joy we feel when we are all together, with the exception of Melania who prefers to stay in New York. Amen.
PARSLEY
The parsley on our Seder plate reminds us of spring and the earths natural bounty, which does not need cumbersome government regulations. We dip the parsley into salt water representing the bitterness of liberal tears. Then eat.
https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/the-kushner-family-passover-haggadah
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The Kushner Family Passover Haggadah (Original Post)
ehrnst
Apr 2017
OP
littlemissmartypants
(22,691 posts)1. This needs cross posting in
Religion
Good Reads
Imo.
Thanks for sharing this, ehrnst.
♡lmsp
ehrnst
(32,640 posts)2. Done - thanks for the suggestion! (nt)
mountain grammy
(26,623 posts)3. Dayenu! Enough already!
Raised with Jews, attended many Seders.
This is hysterical! Next year in Moscow!!!
thanks for posting