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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsDemocrats. Let us not fester or we will become what we hate.
This is not a call to play nice.This is not a warning that we might become racist, sexist, selfish assholes.
This is only a message.
For us to temper ourselves.
When you are confronted with a deplorable who, for example wishes you and your loved ones were shot because you simply suggested that gun control needs to be addressed...
What do you do?
When you're told that you should go spread your love and peace message to the people of Syria so you can get gassed and learn about the real world....
What do you do?
FIRST take a step back and THINK because that's what we're best at.
Is this person saying this online or to your face?
If it's online, DONT LET IT FUEL YOUR CONTEMPT. There are many artificial actors at play online. There are people making we, the left look like intolerant racists and there are people making some of those on the right look like full blown Nazis.
Now don't get me wrong, Nazis exist. And they clearly have permeated through the right for sometime now. But there are good Republicans. That's a fact. Not every Republican is a homophobic sexist, racist asshole.
For example, I had well educated in laws that chose the Republican party because of the theology of republicanism. They essentially understood it as more power to the states and less power to the federal government and that's fine. But that beautiful idea neglects the truth that it's the corporations that get the power and without oversight, they only grow more corrupt. After observing their party for a while, they realized this.
That said, don't judge an entire group based on a random Internet users actions online. That's prejudice thinking and it's not what we do. We should be careful to avoid a pack mentality.
Now, were those heinous comments said to you in person?
Well clearly, this person is not saying it for the lolz behind a computer screen. This person very likely believes in what they're saying.
According to common sense, if someone is saying to your face they hope you get shot and that your family is shot, that's a crime.
But if you had to humor this person. Understand the following...
1. They're highly immature.
2. They're hurt and taking it out on others.
3. They're angry and don't know how to handle those emotions.
But luckily for them, YOU DO KNOW HOW TO HANDLE YOUR EMOTIONS LIKE AN ADULT!
If you must engage, talk to them like an adult but with the logic levels of a child.
"I hope you get shot and I hope your family gets shot!"
."What would that help?"
"The world would be rid of a liberal."
"And clearly the world would continue having shootings like that. How would that help?"
I don't mean talk to them like they're a child with little sarcastic belittling baby speak. I mean pretend as if you're actually taking them seriously. Be genuinely curious as to how your death and your family's death would solve anything. It's kind of like playing dumb but not.
What you want to do here is get the person wrapped up in their aggression with reasoning. Either they continue wishing you harm while pretending they somehow know better than you or they climb up out of that pit of "fucking libtards RARRRGH" and start to use their reasoning skills.
Soon they'll realize that their aggressive language...
1. Isn't getting a rise out of you and they're not getting the higher ground.
2. Doesn't even make any sense and they sound stupid.
By resisting the urge to stoop to their level, you show the patience that would also help them out of their emotional charge.
No this won't work on everyone. And honestly, don't try reasoning with someone bold enough to threaten your life. Let the cops sort that out. Maybe the person is capable of remorse.
But in the end, I just say be better than that. Lead by example. We're the majority so there's no need to stress about that.
Fight fire with water!
beachbum bob
(10,437 posts)advocate....
being nice and playing fair doesn't work as the past 30yrs has shown as conservatives have gained controll at state and local levels. Democrats must go on the ATTACK...or keep losing
retrowire
(10,345 posts)I'm sorry I just don't understand how using circular logic to wrap them up and understand the stupidity of their words counts as being nice and doing nothing.
edhopper
(33,587 posts)was after the collapse allowing the Right to co-opt the anger that was all around.
His, let's move on attitude allowed room for the Tea party.
retrowire
(10,345 posts)"I'm sorry I just don't understand how using circular logic to wrap them up and understand the stupidity of their words counts as being nice and doing nothing."
I'm not saying be nice. I'm saying fight them with a logic that works against their own knee jerk brains. Fight fire with water?
I swear if I get a third post that thinks this means laying down our swords I'm going to scream.
edhopper
(33,587 posts)It didn't for Hillary, it didn't for Obama in the mid-terms.
If it worked the GOP would not control the Government now.
retrowire
(10,345 posts)Regarding personal communications with others.
You can't say that you know for a fact that every single democrat spoke with a well reasoned tone to being threatened and attacked.
There's a reason they think we're the racists. Prove to them why that makes no sense.
Theres a reason they think we have our heads in the clouds.
You're only more likely to succeed in proving the truth to them with straight, reasoned logic.
What else is there? Screaming matches? Voting them out of power when the polls are rigged again?
And even if you did vote them out, will their base remember all the times we treated them with contempt? Or might they recall for a moment some of times we started making sense to them?
lunasun
(21,646 posts)HughBeaumont
(24,461 posts). . . those Congressional/Senate committees not even so much as taking ONE executive, ONE CEO, ONE hedge fund manager to task, not making them face ANY consequences, allow them to continue robbing wealth, not facing even ONE repercussion for their destruction . . .
I feel that fueled the incredible short-sighted "THEY'RE ALL CROOKS!" crap. Our failure to act as a true opposition party after that economic debacle started the corporate ball rolling. It started the argument that no one is on the side of the working people; so much that America's workers dumbfoundingly put their trust in a serial bankrupter of a sole proprietorship that frequently screwed labor and small businesses over . . . all because he was sold as an "outsider" that would "shake things up". Great, now ALL of our lives are going to be fucked.
We lost so much political ground starting with 2010. The fact that the 2012 Popular Vote narrowing against a former corporate raider who frequently shot himself in the foot didn't set off any alarms, or the loss of the Senate . . . it's kind of vexing.
It's like I said before - Democrats got bested by a party that are morally in the Bronze Age, economically in the Gilded Age, culturally in the Antebellum South and technologically in the mid-1990s.
edhopper
(33,587 posts)x10
retrowire
(10,345 posts)leftstreet
(36,108 posts)retrowire
(10,345 posts)And I've only been met with resistance?
No! This will not stand. Do we have compassion?
Do we have stamina?
Love and compassion can prevail, is that wrong?!
cry baby
(6,682 posts)in the street and how calm she is in the face of cops rushing to arrest her. In the last couple of days, we marveled at the young woman standing between a Muslim woman and a hater with her hands in her pocket and a smile on her face.
We say we want to be like that...but the truth is that lots of people like anger. Anger is a good motivator so some choose that path.
I would rather conduct myself your way. Others will choose differently. Maybe we need both during times like these.
retrowire
(10,345 posts)But I don't think the majority should become the tea party of the left, lest we stain our name forever. Right?
cry baby
(6,682 posts)I happen to think that the angry opposition at town halls have been successful with congresscritters, but even faced with a right winger in that adversarial climate, talking calmly and factually in that one on one conversation will be more fruitful, and less stressful perhaps.
retrowire
(10,345 posts)And that's the difference.
Republicans out and about may argue and yell, twist their inaccuracies until they realize it's stupid.
BUT, regarding elected officials? Scare the shit out of them. Yell and show rage. They have sat in their high towers for too long. They obviously don't know what's going on down below so make them know it!
Make them know it.
We agree.
NCTraveler
(30,481 posts)I enjoyed reading your thoughts. These are thoughts each person will take at the individual level. It's simply not possible on the collective level. I feel I can be true to most of what you have said. I also know others can't and am able to recognize the benefits they have in the process.
retrowire
(10,345 posts)You understand it. That means a lot.
Initech
(100,080 posts)retrowire
(10,345 posts)It's not that he disagrees with us, it's that he literally thinks we're useless.
These folks are beyond help. That's brainwashing at its finest.
Defend yourself completely against evil like that. It is beyond reason. It's not trying to talk. It's not just saying you should die because you're a liberal.
It's saying all liberals should die and for a self concocted reason.
This entity has their hatred assembled. It is not a knee jerk reaction. It's not some ignorant angry random person. That's a genocidest. Just don't let them act.
Initech
(100,080 posts)And there's more sane, rational people out there than genocidal maniacs. But this guy's mind has been warped by too much toxic media like Fox News, Infowars and Breitbart to be useful. I guess the "when they go low, we go high" route can apply to these assholes.
retrowire
(10,345 posts)Paladin
(28,264 posts)Our enemies depend on this sort of weak-kneed response from us, and they gain the upper hand with it, over and over. I have no interest in understanding these people---I want to defeat them, and reclaim my country (what's left of it) back from them. If you're not angry and outraged right now, you're just not paying attention. Get back to me with the "play nice" thing, after we're no longer ruled by dangerous lunatics and the fools who support them.
retrowire
(10,345 posts)If you did, feel free to point out where I said...
1. We should understand where they're coming from.
2. We should concede to their arguments.
To quoth a previous explanation of mine...
"I'm sorry I just don't understand how using circular logic to wrap them up and force them to understand the stupidity of their words counts as being nice and doing nothing."
Nothing weak-kneed about making them feel stupid by letting them realize how dumb their argument is.
It's fighting fire with water. Nowhere in my post to I suggest anyone to back down or be nice.
Fatemah2774
(245 posts)I agree, and ironically this is why:
Remember always give your best. Never get discouraged. Never be petty. Always remember, others may hate you. But those who hate you don't win, unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself.
Richard Nixon
And he would know.