A slow news day...still swimming in madness...
Kinda quiet today, huh? With SCROTUS and so much of his team traveling to Europe, the air seemed a little sweeter, didn't it? A little less...sharty, I guess is the word I'm looking for.
Anyway, the Living Garbage Pail Kid is in Poland by now, where the compliant right-wing government has promised to bus in a crowd full of ringers to cheer him and loudly proclaim the normalness of his hand size.
Still, Ol' Shartful was greeted by a glowing green protest message, "NO TRUMP YES PARIS" projected on the Palace of Culture and Science. Drumpf was reportedly frightened at the sight of the projection, as the giant green lettering reminded him of the recent GHOSTBUSTERS remake, which he believes to be a documentary.
Anyway, I hope he found his limo in Warsaw. Or at the very least that some handler steered him to it before he wandered off into the night and joined some creepy Eastern European circus that'd dress him up like some crazed, roller-pin-wielding babushka and charge children a ruble or two to throw rotten eggs at him.
I want to take a moment to draw everybody's attention to one of the most tragic stories in America today. It seems Nikki Haley, our United Nations Ambassador, had to WORK on the holiday! Because the various members of Team Shart generally prefer to suffer in noble silence, we wouldn't even know of Haley's plight were it not for the Tweet she sent out to the entire world whinging about having to spend the day in meetings rather than joining the rest of the Cabinet in shooting bottle rockets at the bushes on the White House lawn until Sean Spicer was driven, singed and crying, into the open to be pelted with uneaten potato salad.
Well, Ambassador Haley, we in the Resistance feel your pain. We're sorry you had to work on the Fourth, you poor thing. Granted, countless thousands of Americans had to work, too, many of them in jobs that don't pay them enough to meet their basic needs, and your party is fighting like hell to steal their health insurance, but FUCK, MEETINGS ARE THE WORST, RIGHT?
Anyhow, with most of the usual suspects quiet today, maybe we can focus on how the modern GOP, independent of Sphincter-Faced Goon who took over last summer, is cruelly, uncontrollably, gleefully, batguano cray all on their own, shall we?
Let's start with Louisiana Congressmoron Clay Higgins, who decided that Auschwitz was the appropriate backdrop for a self-aggrandizing video that called, horrifyingly, for an "invicible" military, a sentiment shared by the builders of the gas chambers Clay decided to use as his theatrical backdrop. That Higgins, who has previously called for the indiscriminate murder of all those merely suspected of being "radicalized," should be so hideously, cartoonishly lacking in self-awareness should surprise no one at this point. But still. Fuck, bro. What's wrong with you?
Didja see that Florida Republicans passed a law that enables any random jag to challenge any aspect of the curriculum in the public schools in their district? They really fucking did this. So now that guy who gets all jacked up on bath salts and fucks an alligator to death can go your daughter's grade school and challenge the math book BECAUSE EVERYBODY KNOWS SIX TIMES EIGHT MEANS IT'S TIME TO CHEW THE GYM TEACHER'S FACE OFF, KIDDIES!
Of course, that's not the bill's intention, I shouldn't be so silly. The point is for crazed evangelical lunatics to gain legal standing to chase climate change and evolution and other aspects of the Demon Men Call Science out of our schools, because "Goddammit, if my kid's gonna be raised a dumbass, it ain't fair for your kids to get a real education, they'll have a leg up."
Mitch McConnell and his band of entry-level Koch employees, excuse me, "United States Senators," continue their quest to find the maximum number of American lives to ruin and/or end without facing electoral consequences, bless their black, shriveled, little hearts.
Word is Ted Cruz and Mike Lee, America's favorite pair of incorrigible lunatics, reeeeeaalllly want to squeeze as much murder as possible into the bill, while Dean Heller frantically scrambles for a photo op where he like, plugs some grandmother's respirator back in, or something.
So Mitch finds himself caught between the proverbial rock and a hard place here, especially since Rand Paul on the I-would-literally-hunt-and-eat-the-poor-if-I-could-get-away-with-it Right and Susan Collins on the I'm-running-for-governor-and-I-can't-win-if-my-constituents-notice-I'm-killing-them Center keep indicating their opposition is more or less cast in stone. (GET IT? ROCK? STONE? I'll stop now.) Shit, all Mitch wants to do is lay a shit-ton of eggs on the beach and swim away into the sea for a year or so, you'd almost feel bad for him if he wasn't such a power-mad evil fuckhead. But he is. So, y'know...fuck him.
Meanwhile, individual Republican Senators are doing everything in their power to avoid anything that even resembles a constituent on their holiday recess. They're either refusing to meet with any citizens, or doing so only in the most out-of-the-way, hard-to-reach, deep-red corners of their states. Shit, Pat Toomey had a fake, invitation-only "town hall," hoping nobody would notice the protesters he refused to let in. We told Pat we noticed, but he just squinted real hard and covered his ears and insisted we weren't real. If I found out that, say, Roy Blunt, scheduled an open town hall in Gotham City or Narnia or some shit, hoping to slip back to D.C. before anybody figured it out, I wouldn't even blink.
And hey, no need to keep the spotlight solely on the political class! Nah, let's get down in the weeds and spend some time with the base! These Real Muricans who every media outlet tells me matter more than anyone else despite their inability to tell the difference between observable reality and Pizzagate.
Seems a bunch of the little Shartkins whipped themselves up into a state of extra-frothy rage at National Public Radio for their terrible horrible no good very bad divisiveness! How dare they criticize the God Emperor by...tweeting out quotes from the Declaration of Independence?
C'mon, really? REALLY? I mean, if these folks were bright, they'd have seen through Don the Con like the rest of us, but...yelling at the fuckin' DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE? Are we 100% sure this is real? Because if somebody told me we were all living inside an unfinished draft screenplay of a Michael Bay movie, I'd go, "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...makes sense."
Good Gravy, this stuff with CNN and the internet hatebeast that made the stupid WWF video? I guess the big cause on the right today is...give me a minute, this is so epically fucking stupid that I can't be sure I'm getting it right...that CNN blackmailed the guy (they didn't) and he's only 15 (he's a grown man) and they doxxed him (again, no) and it's some kind of evil fake news media assault on a Trump supporter (wait, what?) and they broke some laws (wh-am I on a hidden camera show or something?) and it's...fuck. I get it. Y'all hate the media, and you don't really need an excuse to run around ripping your hair out and screeching about whatever perceived sin they've committed, but c'mon...you're sticking up for some rando that makes a bunch of racist hate memes? Is this, finally, what the American Right has come to? WHO WILL THINK OF THE ANONYMOUS REDDIT KLANSMEN?
There was that little thing where it turns out that the gender pay gap among White House staff under the Shart is wider than it's been in years, you saw that, right? Puts you in a weird position, doesn't it? Like, our values are our values, but are we rooting for Omarosa and Sarah Huckabee Sanders to get raises?
Oh, and Hobby Lobby, aka the Tip of the Spear of Religious Liberty, got caught smuggling thousands of ancient artifacts out of Iraq, because while covering birth control for their employees is against their religion, years of massive, organized theft isn't, in spite of Thou Shalt Not Steal being engraved rather clearly on all those Ten Commandments monuments these fucks are always trying to install in publicly-owned spaces.
Funny, how often the folks who spend half their lives passing judgment on the morality of others turn out to be criminals who don't live by the rules they'd force on the rest of the world...innit?
Huh. There was a bit more insanity than I'd initially thought. Well, let's all take a breath, open a beer, and get back to photoshopping Chris-Christie-on-the-Beach into assorted amusing historical and fictional scenes. If there's a God, that's why he made us.
= new reply since forum marked as read
Thank goodness we have you to help us see through this morass and laugh at the same time!
Thank You!
"folks who spend half their lives passing judgment on the morality of others turn out to be criminals who don't live by the rules they'd force on the rest of the world"
amen to that!
Well done as always
Last edited Thu Jul 6, 2017, 11:45 PM - Edit history (1)
I have a good excuse, tho.
I was pondering something. Something which has caused much consternation, debate, and pearl clutching in liberal circles and here on the ol' DU.
Why aren't we taking the High Road? Well, my answer to that after much analysis (and substance abuse) is simply, "We are."
I don't say this lightly. If one is to buy into what I posit, one must observe the incomprehensible level of "low" (Examples abound in this, your latest post, TF.) achieved by the current Freak-show of what is being passed off as leadership by the Republicans. (their Establishment, no less.) This behavior is at best waved-off as some sort of misunderstanding on the part of everyone with at least two working brain-cells and slightly more empathy than Dr. Mengele or at worst it is outright condoned and encouraged by persons so corrupt and evil, I lack the vocabulary to properly describe them.
In other words... With the proverbial "bar" plumbing the depths of the black hole at the Galactic Center, the former low is now the high.
"Low" is the new "High". That is my conclusion.
Will "High" ever again resemble the kindness, understanding, and intelligence of the "High" not so long ago? It could, I suppose. But, it's going to require a large segment of our society and culture to completely reject what is currently being held up as the new normal by the Republicans and also the very public removal and condemnation of those responsible for bringing everything to this point. No exceptions. I believe we're too nice to ever achieve it, tho. Sad to say.
Anyway, thanks again for your rundown and take care, TF. 
...it made perfect sense to me.
And I join your sad to sayness. Ah, Civility. Have you gone forever? Wistful sigh.
