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Are_grits_groceries

(17,111 posts)
Fri Sep 22, 2017, 01:40 PM Sep 2017

Insults

The poet Robert Burns could not stand criticism. If you want to insult somebody, he has a certain style.
A letter to a critic:
"Ellisland, 1791.

Dear Sir:

Thou eunuch of language; thou Englishman, who never was south the Tweed; thou servile echo of fashionable barbarisms; thou quack, vending the nostrums of empirical elocution; thou marriage-maker between vowels and consonants, on the Gretna-green of caprice; thou cobler, botching the flimsy socks of bombast oratory; thou blacksmith, hammering the rivets of absurdity; thou butcher, embruing thy hands in the bowels of orthography; thou arch-heretic in pronunciation; thou pitch-pipe of affected emphasis; thou carpenter, mortising the awkward joints of jarring sentences; thou squeaking dissonance of cadence; thou pimp of gender; thou Lyon Herald to silly etymology; thou antipode of grammar; thou executioner of construction; thou brood of the speech-distracting builders of the Tower of Babel; thou lingual confusion worse confounded; thou scape-gallows from the land of syntax; thou scavenger of mood and tense; thou murderous accoucheur of infant learning; thou ignis fatuus, misleading the steps of benighted ignorance; thou pickle-herring in the puppet-show of nonsense; thou faithful recorder of barbarous idiom; thou persecutor of syllabication; thou baleful meteor, foretelling and facilitating the rapid approach of Nox and Erebus.

R.B."

Thou dotard!

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niyad

(113,205 posts)
1. years ago, one of my most treasured books was the oxford compendium of insults and curses.
Fri Sep 22, 2017, 01:43 PM
Sep 2017

alas, it disappeared.

of course, there was always johnny carson's karnak the magnificent: "may the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits"

Warpy

(111,222 posts)
3. Remember "Maledicta?"
Fri Sep 22, 2017, 02:43 PM
Sep 2017

It was a niche magazine on cheap paper and I subscribed for a while. It vanished in the mid 00s, along with other equally worthy journals.

kydo

(2,679 posts)
4. What about, "Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelled of elderberries." ?
Fri Sep 22, 2017, 02:55 PM
Sep 2017

I always like that one. So did the Game of Thrones.

HBO: Have you planted any Easter eggs in the show?
David Peterson: One of the biggest is from Episode 3 this season. There's a scene where the Meereenese rider is challenging Daenerys' champion. He's shouting and Nathalie Emmanuel [Missandei] is translating – but she's not translating what he's saying. He's actually saying a Low Valyrian translation of the French guy's insults in 'Monty Python and the Holy Grail.' That was [series creator] Dan Weiss's idea and it was so hilarious that I had to do it.

HBO: Have fans caught on?

David Peterson: They know that something's going on. Right after that episode aired, I was getting tweets like, "Is he saying a 'your momma' joke?" Close… But no, he's actually starting out with, "Your mother is a hamster."
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