Na Kia shares something she hopes white people will hear. Let's listen, okay?

[pnwmom]

This is from her public post on FB, available for anyone to read in full. The events she described didn't happen in 1950 or 1960. They happened in 1999-2000 -- when a lot of us white people thought things were getting better.

https://www.facebook.com/nakia.trammel/posts/10213920227017950

I want to share something with you all...particularly white people(you will understand why I'm speaking directly to you in a moment). This is long, but I won't apologize for using my words.

****For my Black people and other POC, TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of racism, mentions of neglect of children by "good people".****

When I was in high school in SW Arkansas, our football team had to travel to the northern part of the state to play another school. Now, our school was pretty diverse, but our football team and our band were predominately Black students. I was a member of the band and that year, the band traveled with the football team.

It was never lost on us Black students that our skin tone was a problem for people. We lived in Arkansas, after all, and we had ALL experienced racism from someone. I knew not one person who hadn't. This was all before any of us had reached adulthood.
Our band director held a meeting for us to give us "the talk". No, he wasn't talking about the birds and the bees. He wasn't talking about the Xs and Os of our marching formations. He wasn't talking about the sharps and flats in our music. And he sure as hell wasn't talking about the tassels on our uniforms. This talk was about how we needed to "behave" in Northern Arkansas. This talk was about how we needed to stick together because it was dangerous for us there. No, it wasn't because of gangs. It wasn't because the school was a big rival. It was because we were Black.

See, it was well-known that the KKK had a headquarters up there and they had been known to come to the games just to cause trouble. We were 15, 16, 17, and 18-year-old kids. We were "band nerds". We just wanted to cheer on our team, play our halftime show, and go back home, hopefully with a win. That's it. Such a simple wish list.

Well, we were given instructions that included:
1. No cheering too loud when our team scored or made a great defensive play.
2. Never go to the bathroom or concession stand alone. Always go in groups.
3. Don't mind the police escorts when we got to town, on the way to the stadium, when we took the field, when we left the field, when we went to the buses, when we were leaving town.
4. If ANYONE said anything to us, just walk away to the nearest police officers.
All of this for a football game between two teams that never really played each other, so there was no rivalry.
All of this for a bunch of teenagers to not go missing or be assaulted or be killed.

SNIP

[mcar]

1. This makes me so sad

That our fellow human beings have to experience this.

And racism and sexism still going on in 2017. Will we ever learn?

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

2. This is sad but not surprising.

Some relatives of mine (to my everlasting shame) moved to northern Arkansas in about 2005 because there were hardly any black people in the area. They bragged about how great it was there for that reason.

[raven mad]

3. I'm crying.

I wish she'd grown up here in Alaska. Even in 1968, when we elected our Class President (a wonderful black guy that we still see a lot). One of the sayings was "how can you tell what color or sex a person is in a snowmachine suit, face mask, scarf and parka". No one except some of the military newbies ever questioned race.

I was a gymnast on the school team (GO MALEMUTES!) Our best was Libby from Unalakleet, and right up there with her was Jo Ella, a recent transplant from Mississippi. Weird how that works, because at 63? I still can't figure out how anyone is judged by color of their skin.

I'm saving this; spouse will cry, too.

[pnwmom]

4. It's a very powerful piece. It moved me, too. n/t

[raven mad]

7. This will be saved for my collection forever.

I'm glad I had the parents I had. And she is awesome.

[Me.]

5. TRuth In America

[csziggy]

6. Na Kia, I am so sorry you experienced this - I know exactly where it came from

My uncle was an evangelical Baptist minister in northern Arkansas. He was one of the most openly racist, bigoted people I ever met.

My uncle and his parishioners were the people Na Kia and her fellow students had to watch out for. Although they claimed to be Christians, the people of my uncle's church were the antithesis of what I read of Christ's teachings.

My uncle's brand of Christianity turned me against religion before I graduated from high school. I wanted nothing to do with any institution that would allow the kind of hatred and prejudice that my uncle taught by his words and deed. My uncle was not the first minister in the family to be that way - he was just the one of the generation I knew. His sons, both ministers, are not a whole lot better than he was.

I apologize for my family and the contribution they made to the ignorance and bigotry that they perpetrated for at least two hundred years. I apologize to Na Kia and all her classmates for what they experienced. I am sorry.

[raven mad]

8. Do not take the blame for family/friends that aren't able to see.

I don't do religions much, but I do respect them. UNTIL this kind of crap infiltrates it. NO EXCUSES, IDIOTS.

Small minds are hard to expand, but we'll continue to try.

[csziggy]

9. I am ashamed of a family that for over two hundred years has pushed prejudice

Under the auspices of religion. I stopped interacting with my uncle when he demonstrated his racism. Fortunately we lived far enough away that I didn't have to do much to maintain separation.

I am grateful that my mother moved away from central Alabama where the family had lived since 1819 and that she is sensible enough to understand that prejudice in this age is stupid. While she may have some ingrained biases, she works past them and treats everyone with respect, unlike her brother. Even with advancing Alzheimers, she maintains respect for people.

As for religions, I studied them as part of my anthropology degree and decided that none are truly rational while some of their tenets are. I will respect the individual believers with respect if they treat others the same way. If they display hatred and prejudice, I will have no respect for them. Mostly I leave religion out of my life and my conversations.

[raven mad]

10. csziggy, you're in central Alabama?

My daughter and both granddaughters live near Birmingham. I hope my raising her the same way my folks did gets passed on. She's a UAB grad. in business.

[csziggy]

11. No, my Mom's family was in Marion, Perry County, Alabama

Mom left when she became a Navy Nurse before the beginning of WWII. She served in Virginia Beach VA, Camp Pendleton, CA, and then in Hawaii. She met Dad in Hawaii and they moved to central Florida where he had grown up.

I currently live outside of Tallahassee, Florida - came up here for college and never left.

[raven mad]

13. LOL! I got stuck in Alaska.............. in 1968.

Your mom is a hero and raised an awesome kid. My spouse was totally impressed with Tallahassee - he didn't think there were hills in Florida! Did a motorcycle trip here to Merritt Island years ago.

[csziggy]

15. Oh - Alaska would be my worst nightmare

Though I know people who lived there and loved it. I just couldn't take the cold.

Mom and Dad were both in the Navy - Dad ended up as a submariner. They met in Hawaii when after the war someone decided the nurses needed sub tours. Dad guided the group of nurses Mom was the head of and that was pretty much it. They were together 76 years. Mom is still going and tough as nails.

Tallahassee has some nice hills - our farm is on a ridge that is 200 ft above sea level. If sea levels rise, this will be an off shore island!

Merritt Island is totally cool - best bird watching ever. If you enjoyed that think about visiting St. Marks Wildlife Refuge some time. The bird watching is nearly as good, and though there pretty much are no beaches there some of the best beaches in Florida are along the coast to the west.

[raven mad]

16. My father-in-love was Navy all the way.

And heck, yeah, you'd do great here, and are welcome any time. We're in the Interior, which is colder AND warmer depending on the season! It hit 98 last summer, and 40 below last winter.

I was raised on Merritt Island, and the sanctuary near KSC is awesome. St. Marks ROCKS.

[csziggy]

18. Dad was Naval Reserve but thought about going career

He really enjoyed the sub service. When he was promoted to LT (jg) they found that some depth bombing the sub had experienced had damaged his hearing. The doctor doing the exam wanted to deny the promotion but the captain overrode him.

It meant that if Dad stayed in the Navy he would not have a future in submarines so after the end of the war he mustered out and finished his engineering degree - get this - at Michigan Tech in Houghton. Upper Peninsula, colder than Alaska sometimes. Mom HATED it up there and HATED the cold. She never willingly visited anywhere that cold again and refused to consider living anywhere it might snow regularly.

Tallahassee is cold enough for me, LOL!

[politicaljunkie41910]

12. Thanks for sharing this pnwmom. I can't imagine what the person who wrote this must

have gone through since I didn't grow up in Arkansas. I am a black woman born and raised in California who like Na Kia, I received the "talk" many times when I left home, but it wasn't Na Kia's talk. My parents and teachers always reminded me that I could do anything I set my mind to do. The sky was the limit. The only thing stopping me from doing anything I set my mind to, was ME.

They taught me to respect everyone even when they didn't respect me. They taught me to turn the other cheek. They taught me confidence in who I was and what I was not and therefore, I didn't even have to acknowledge anyone who disrespected me. And my parents taught all nine of us children that we were never to come home having got into a fight because someone had said something about them, because they had confidence in who they were and who they were not.

So our job was to go to school and be the best student we could be. It saddens me that Na Kia had to live through what she did, just to live through a trip to and from Northern Arkansas. I hope that things have changed a lot since then in Northern Arkansas. It's a shame that she had to experience what she did just to play in her school's band and watch her team play. No child should have had to tollerate that kind of behavior then, and I certainly hope that no child has to today in these United States just to attend a sporting event in their home state. No I'm not niave, I've been around the world having served in the US Army and I know that there are good and bad people in this world, but I've been blessed to have known that there are many more good people than bad people. And while one bad person can ruin your whole day, they can't change YOU if you don't allow them to. With California being such a diverse state, I was able to participate in lots of activities that exposed me to people of many backgrounds and cultures as my parents enrolled me in lots of diverse activities, and I can honestly say that I'm a better person for having that experience.

[raven mad]

14. I remember having to ask my folks WHY there were 2 separate bathrooms.

Two separate water fountains, etc. It's disgusting. Take a little white kid (me) through the deep south, and I had to ask. Mom & Dad explained as best the could. Na Kia? I am still crying after 55 years of it.

[politicaljunkie41910]

17. If you're still crying after 55 years, that makes you a human being. You didn't create the

problem and as a child you were powerless to correct it. But since you are not part of the Alt Right or some other white supremacist group, your parents did something right. Thank them for me as well as thank you for realizing at such a young age that something was not right about those separate fountains. I'm crying now, but its a good cry, so thanks for being part of that change.

[raven mad]

20. I'll wish them both angel wings.

In Heaven (or wherever), they're still always with me.

[pnwmom]

19. This woman was talking about something that happened only 17 years ago.

I might have thought things had gotten better since then -- I thought Obama's Presidency meant it had -- but now I suspect it's probably still the same in Arkansas, and anywhere else the KKK has maintained a foothold.

I'm glad to hear that your experience in CA was so different. It gives me some hope.

P.S. Your parents sound wonderful.

[salin]

21. Powerful. Very powerful.

Thanks for posting this.