God, how long has that ancient bloated fuck been gibbering now?

[thegoose]

I thought it seemed like at least before 4:00 CST and now he's still "answering questions." But in the world he created for us, time has no more meaning.

[MontanaMama]

1. I can't even believe it.

The lies are incredible today.

[Blue Owl]

2. Cram an apple in the pig's mouth

and start up the spit...

[thegoose]

3. The rotisserie

But it'd stink so bad when the fat dripped out. It'd pollute four states.

[Lord Ludd]

4. See if I understand Einstein correctly (I stunk at Physics)

When spacetime encounters mass, gravity is created.

The greater the mass, the greater the gravity produced.

The greater the gravity produced, the more time slows down, e.g. time runs slower (by the tiniest fraction) when you're on the ground than up in an airplane.

THAT'S WHY Trump's daily briefings seem interminable -- his enormous mass produces a sh*tload of gravity.

[Kaiserguy]

5. Trump produces something

but it more like a super tanker full of BS than gravity every time he opens his mouth

[BillyBobBrilliant]

6. He is purposefully hijacking the news cycle

To inculcate the deception onto the country.