The Borowitz Report: Greenland Suggests Trump Acquire Epstein's Island Instead

[FakeNoose]

Link: https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/greenland-suggests-trump-acquire

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a counterproposal designed to ease tensions with the United States, on Thursday Greenland suggested that Donald J. Trump acquire Jeffrey Epstein’s island instead.

“President Trump has no roots on our island,” Greenlandic government spokesman Hartvig Dorkelson said. “Epstein’s island, on the other hand, must stir many happy memories for him.”

Acknowledging that Epstein’s island “could benefit from rebranding,” Dorkelson said, “More than the Kennedy Center, this is a place that should have Trump’s name on it.”

Meanwhile, Trump ramped up his imperialist rhetoric, declaring that the US needed to own Lapland in order to corner the world market in laptops.

- short article, no more at link -



Good one Andy, but don't give him any ideas .... Chump is likely to take BOTH islands.
On the other hand, there's nothing in it for Pootie, so he probably won't bother with it.

[LakeVermilion]

1. Actually, I believe he would be looking for (drum roll please)...

lap dances.

[FakeNoose]

2. Would his little "mushroom" stand the excitement?

Probably not ... Melania hasn't been there for over a decade.