Dean Martin: The GOP’s Role Model
10/3/2013
By S.J Morris
This question is for people who have basic cable: Do you ever watch CSPAN? Most of the airtime is of Congress or the Senate in session. Usually, you’ll see a bunch of people, milling around, doing nothing. It’s as if you’re watching a surveillance camera outside a 7-11 convenience store. It doesn’t make for very titillating T.V. The only time I watch it is when I have the flu and have nothing better to do. Both houses, basically, are holding tedious legislative sessions. All of the rules and parliamentary procedures would bore even the almighty to tears. And you wonder why the common American doesn’t pay much attention to the mechanics of the constitutionally mandated Houses!
Now, however, we’ve got some action! The bureaucratic, federal bodies are must see T.V! Somehow, to me, this is so contrived; it’s as if some Hollywood producer is running the show! This is a two-party, Vaudeville soap opera, “Shut Down the Federal Government!” How long will this go on? Can you imagine if we were to shut down the oil companies, maybe Wall Street? How about the banks? That, of course, will never happen.
So this neo-Vaudeville show is like professional sports. Who is your team? Who are you rooting for? Please! Most of the political rodeo clowns are Republicans. With their Brooks Brothers suits and Windsor tie knots, they look like background artists for the T.V. series, “Madmen.” Talk about living in the past! They also look like they’re at a cocktail party at the Playboy Mansion. Speaking of cocktails…
On the final night of Congress, just after the shut down began at midnight, a bunch of Republicans emerged from the Congressional Chambers, behind Boehner, smiling and laughing. The cameras caught this and a lot of people interpreted this as schadenfreude, or just old fashioned gloating! The truth was: they were all drunk off their asses! The halls of Congress smelled like a low rent bar in skid row! It was akin to a beer hall celebration in pre-Nazi Germany, after the Brown Shirts had broken a Jewish merchant’s window!
This raises the question: Should members of the House and Senate be administered digital Breathalyzer tests? Why not? It will give the Capitol cops something to do. Not that alcoholism is a problem within the two chambers; this obviously emanates from their college fraternity days. Being an American asshole is so macho! We’ll never see the Democrats having a pot party after passing a bill (don’t I wish).
After all the dust clears, they will simply get away with this unconstitutional act of shutting down the people’s government. And for not working, they will get their usual paychecks.
So, last call for alcohol, boys! Drink up! You’ve made your corporate masters quite happy! My fellow Americans…this is one tavern under God!
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