Christmas gift idea for somone you don't really care for that much?

[sl8]

Imagine opening one of these in the living room:

v

[tblue37]

1. What is it? nt

[sl8]

2. Pretty sure it's sold as an aircraft evacuation slide. But, with a little imagination ... n/t

[Glorfindel]

7. I have no idea, but I really, really want one.

n/t

[sarge43]

3. A classic "What does this do"?

"It does that."

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

4. It does that ... once.

Good luck folding it so it fits in the box again.

[sarge43]

5. It will never go back in the box

It's free and intends to rampage across the moors, terrorizing peasants and annoying the gentry

[Glorfindel]

6. Best post ever, sarge43!

[sarge43]

8. Why thank you, sir

[ailsagirl]

16. That's hilarious, sarge43!!

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

9. The Moors await this rampage, scimitars in hand, Othello at point.

Bring on your silly gas-filled excuse of a flying carpet!

[sarge43]

10. En garde, unbeliever

The Carpet will fulfill its destiny

[FSogol]

11. LOL. n/t

[Iggo]

18. It's out in the streets

And roaming the moors

So you better lock all

Your windows and screens.

[flt rsk]

12. Mattress

A few years ago my wife and I purchased a vacuum packed, memory foam mattress. The instructions said to open the bag and allow the mattress to open on it’s own and not to force it. This could take up to 24 hrs. When the last piece of plastic wrap was cut, my wife was standing on the other side of the mattress waiting to get the plastic out of the way. The mattress apparently had not read the instructions and opened fast. My wife was pinned against the wall and screaming. I was laughing so hard I couldn’t catch my breath. It was like a comedy scene with Lucy and Ethel.

[sarge43]

13. Were you still laughing once she was free from the clutches of that illiterate mattress?

[Orrex]

14. Soon thereafter the mattress was placed under a rest

[whistler162]

15. Or the Dick Van Dyke Show

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

17. Or inside an airplane...