My main problem with the RED DAWN redux

[derby378]

For political reasons, America gets invaded by North Koreans instead of the Chinese. That required a million bucks worth of post-production editing and script changes to fix the movie.

Here's my beef. If North Korean soldiers were to touch down on American soil, wouldn't they immediately make a beeline to the nearest supermarket or fast food joint? I hear many of their soldiers are having trouble getting three squares a day, too. If they're chomping down on our food, they might be very easy to capture without firing a shot. Hell, some of them might even desert!

[rrneck]

1. North Korea!?

[Xyzse]

2. Heh... I don't think they would have wanted to deal with the Chinese.

Besides, China is now a viable market for movies.

I definitely agree with you.

[jmowreader]

10. They started out with a Chinese invasion

Then they realized it would kill the Chinese market, and changed it to the DPRK.

[Xyzse]

24. Yep

Exactly what I meant, that China is now a viable market.
North Korea, not so much.

[jmowreader]

3. Here is my major problem with it

They set this movie in Spokane, Wash. Spokane has the Air Force Survival School, many gun stores, lots of veterans who own guns, thousands of hunters, an ammo factory 2 hours away, very complex topography, and the state of Idaho with all its hunters and teabaggers half an hour away. Of all the places.that could deal with a North Korean invasion, Spokane is close to the top of the list.

[sarge43]

6. Another nit pick

How did the force get from there to here without being noticed? Moving the troops and material to mount and support an effective invasion of the ConUS would light up every radar, sonar and spies in the sky like Times Square on New Year's Eve. It wouldn't get into international waters or air space before everything we have from M-16s to ICBMs would be pointed at them.

[madinmaryland]

8. The teabaggers will be much further than a half hour away. They will be the first to run-away....

Chicken-shit, Ted Nugent typa's.

[Ken Burch]

16. That, and if the DPRK DID invade the U.S.

wouldn't they just loot a bunch of supermarkets and go home?

[jmowreader]

20. Not at all

The above-the-fold head on every paper in the country would be "Entire invasion force defects to US."

You can't keep 'em down on the farm once they've seen Paree, right? Do you really think even the most hard-boiled communist, once he's seen a grocery store with groceries in it, would go back to North Korea?

[Ken Burch]

21. Than it wouldn't be so much of an invasion as a mass defection.

Still...would they really want to stay in Spokane?

[jmowreader]

33. Spokane would be a good place for them

It's not so large they'd be overwhelmed. It's not so small they'd stick out like sore thumbs. There's a thriving Oriental community - Koreans, Vietnamese, some Chinese and Japanese. One of the best Asian supermarkets I've ever seen is here.(A few months ago I reported on the pork uteri this place carries. Turns out they sell the fuck out of them - there are some Hmong families who live for them like a Cajun lives for crawfish.) Plus, it's pretty up here.

In theory someplace with a Koreatown would be better...in reality, Spokane is laid back enough they'd do well here.(Yes, I like Spokane very much.)

[dexterborg]

4. Hawaii

Would be great LOL
[img][/img]

[baldguy]

5. And how long do you think the American insurgents would take before they became "terrorists"?

IEDs, car bombs & suicide bombers are very effective weapons in asymmetrical warfare.

[hunter]

7. They should've just made them space aliens disguised as humans.

Hell, maybe these space aliens took over North Korea. That would explain a lot, wouldn't it?

I saw the preview in our local theater. People were laughing... not in a good way.

[Drunken Irishman]

9. It's hard to imagine NK manning a plane long enough to get to the west coast.

[Angleae]

17. It's harder to imagine they have a plane capable of getting to the west coast.

Although they do have a very small group of them that can make it half way. I guess they'd just have to swim the other 2000 miles.

[Systematic Chaos]

11. PRNK? Fo' shizzle?

That's gotta make this officially as stupid as the Atlas Shrugged movies.

Can't wait to watch it for free for the comedy.

[jmowreader]

34. Fo' shizzle

It's not the People's Republic of North Korea, it's the Democratic People's Republic of Korea.

I used to teach grunts a "This is a Commie" class. I told them you can pretty reliably pick out your communist countries by name: Any country with "democratic," "socialist" or "people's republic" in its name is, with no exceptions, a communist country.

Then we get to North Korea. Its real name has two of the three red flags in it. It therefore stands to reason - reasoning which has been proven eerily accurate - that North Korea is twice as communist as any other nation.

[Systematic Chaos]

35. Oops! Yer right. I can never keep all those abbreviations straight.

All I do know is that this renders the remake of the movie even more pathetic than the original (when it was who? Mexico? Some other Central or South American nation?) which was supposed to magically invade us.

[jmowreader]

36. The original was Soviets and Cubans

Supposedly the Soviets used Ilyushin-76 freighters painted in Aeroflot livery to drop Special Purpose Forces troops into Colorado...that Aeroflot wasn't allowed to fly anywhere in the US but JFK or LAX, Il-76s (which Aeroflot had then) weren't allowed anywhere in the US, and the Air Force would have scrambled while the planes were still in the vicinity of Hawaii (Il-76s look exactly like what they are; they also look like US Air Force C-141s) are all beside the point.

[NewJeffCT]

12. My problem is that North Korea is a country of 24 million people

unless they have super-advanced technology far beyond what they have now, there is no way they could invade the US - they just don't have enough people. Texas itself has 25 million people. The Persians were invading Greece when they faced the 300 Spartans (and others). The 300 spartans could not have invaded Persia and been successful.

Heck, our ally to the North, Canada, has close to 35 million people. They'd be more of a threat.

[christx30]

14. I loved the first on

Might see the second one. Lots of bad jokes. Like North Korea uses a catapult to throw starving citizens at the US forces. US forces are overwhelmed by firepower and fall back, winning the war for the North Koreans. I'd believe any Fringe or Star Wars concept before I'd believe in North Korea launching a successful invasion of the US.

[Drunken Irishman]

19. They also have the technology of a 1950s sci-fi movie.

[Kaleva]

13. How about the starving, invading North Koreans ate our food laced with Ex-Lax by the Wolverines?

In the final climatic scene, the entire North Korean Army craps itself to death.

[jrandom421]

15. Had to suspend my belief to enjoy the movie

They talk about all electronics being disabled by an EMP. Military grade electronics have been hardened against an EMP since the '60s. Flying hordes of prop driven transports, the fighters at Kadena and Elmendorf would have made junk out of as many as they had ammo for. Joint Base Lewis-McChord is only 3 hours away, their Patriot batteries would have cleaned up any survivors. Finally, how about sending the 3rd, 4th, and 5th Stryker Brigades,escorted by AH-64s,and infiltrating in 1/75th Rangers to really make the NKs lives really miserable?
Don't forget the F-15Es based at Mountain Home, just outside Boise.

[cliffordu]

25. Don't forget the flying Warthogs from the naval airbase on Whidbey Island

Bad day for anyone in their way.

[jrandom421]

27. Don't forget the rest of the Navy

Not only the Trident base at Bangor, but the Carl Vinson battle group, home ported at Bremerton. And let's not forget the rest of the Washington National and Air Guard as well.

[cliffordu]

29. Yep, and then, too, random assholes like me......

who'd be REALLY pissed if anyone invaded.

I'd beat 'em with rocks and sticks.

[sarge43]

37. The Hogs were specifically designed for an in your face attack on ground forces.

A tank commander's worst nightmare -- an A-10 in the rear view mirror.

[cliffordu]

38. Yep.

[jrandom421]

39. Even if it was the Chinese instead of the North Koreans

Two other things would have made life miserable for them.

JADM- Joint Area Denial Munitions, anti-armor/anti-personell dual purpose cluster bombs

JSOW- Joint Stand Off Weapon, precision guided long range big explosive missiles

[Angleae]

41. Or in any other mirror. But there are none in Washington state.

[cliffordu]

42. When I lived in Port Townsend, they were stationed

at the naval air base on Whidbey Island. That was two years ago, and I don't believe they've moved.

[Angleae]

45. You sure about that?

Keep in mind the warthog (A-10) is an Air Force plane (all of them). They won't station them at a navy base except for training for a week or two.

[Angleae]

40. What Warthogs at Whidbey?

Sorry, no A-10s there. Never has been, never will be.

[jrandom421]

43. There's the Pacific Fleet Attack training squadrons at Whidbey

LOTS of F/A 18s and lots of pilots and instructors who love to drop the big iron on crunchy ground targets.

[Angleae]

44. They're all EW birds (EA-6B, EA-18G).

All the attack squadrons are in California and Virginia. All the training squadrons are in Florida.

[cecilfirefox]

18. The basic premise of Red Dawn is entertaining- America under an invasion,

However, in terms of practicality, all the scenarios are absurd. North Koreans have no man power, no technology, no serious artillery- and I'm still curious how they get all the way to America with an invasion force that can stand up to the United States Military without notice.

Also, I think the basic premise of the original movie was unbelievable and stupid to begin with.

Let's hope there will be explosions.

[rrneck]

26. They're working on it.

[Liberal_in_LA]

22. that movie is getting low low ratings on Rottentomatoes

[Kennah]

23. The original was entertaining ...

... but even it was little more than jingoism. The Soviets and Cubans invade us using commerical airplanes, and they just strapped their tanks to the wings? Uh-huh.

Today, the idea is even more of a farce. China and Russia could conspire to invade us, they could land troops, and they could take a major city or two. Spokane? Not so much. Seattle and Portland. Yeah probably. Los Angeles and San Diego? More possible.

Then what? Well, Tea Baggers would shit themselves and hide out, which would be the smart thing to do. Every radio and TV station would be broadcasting "Stay off the roads. Stay indoors."

Battle hardened troops out of Fort Lewis would go racing up I-5 to meet them in Seattle, and it would be a major shitstorm. Then as everything else from the U.S. military arrived, the Chinese and Russian militaries would be decimated.

Seriously, Zombies or Space Aliens are more plausible.

[bif]

28. Some of the movie was filmed about 2 miles from my home

On the east side of Detroit! I'll watch it just for that.

[HEyHEY]

30. My problem

Is the kow towing to China. And it's not political, it's all in the name of the almighty dollar.

[applegrove]

31. That is very true. I know when I finished a one week canoe trip

we all rushed into the first grocery store we found and bought things like cans of icing to eat on the bus home. It's not funny, but I bet those NK soldiers are desperate for things that are sweet and substantial.

[HEyHEY]

32. One trip when I was in the serivce (with the boy scouts)

We had hiked three hours into a place for the weekend to discover our rations were destoryed by a leak in the pack. So, we elected to make the best of it. One of the leaders had a bunch of canned oysters, which I ended up LOVING after two days of potatos.

I begged my mom to by some canned smoked oysters and I anxiously opened the can and ate one... I almost fucking puked.

[AsahinaKimi]

46. The silly thing about this movie

Is in order to get to America, they would have to invade China and then Russia to cross the ice bridge to Alaska, and then go though Canada to get to Washington State.

In the Trailer they came in by aircraft and parachuted in. I don't think they have that many aircraft, and if they came in a huge swarm, they would be noticed by Hawaii's Radar most likely.

Not sure what town or city they invaded first.. (And wait..don't we still have Norad and Satellites all over the planet?)

Totally silly premise.