Heartbroken...

[Bicoastal]

I had four amazing dates with a girl over the course of four weeks, each better than the last. We bonded over our similarities, shared secrets, hooked up, etc...After the most recent date, we planned our next one in detail (a day at the Guggenheim) before she left town for a New Years party.

And then a few days later, instead of a time to meet her at, I got this message:

"I just wanted to write and say that I have had a wonderful time getting to know you over the past few weeks. But I need to be honest and let you know that I recently saw someone who I was dating in the past who has moved back to NYC. I feel like I owe it to myself to give it a proper chance and see where it goes.
I hope you can understand that"

Completely out of nowhere. Ladies, I have nothing but this message to go on, but does this sound legit to you? Or is this something women say when they want a guy out of their life without hurting his feelings? Part of me wants to wait a month or two, see other people, and then check back in with her; the other part just wants to move on...

[RandySF]

1. Move on.

I've played the 'wait it out' game before and it never works. I'm sorry to hear about this.

[pacalo]

2. If your dates were just as amazing for her, as well, then I would guess that her explanation

was legitimate.

Dating can be torturous in this way. I'm so sorry for your disappointment. I'd move on, though.

[Brickbat]

3. Say "thanks for the honesty" and move on.

At least you found out now, instead of later.

I'm a woman and I've gotten that line before. It's like a kick in the stomach, but there's nothing to do but move on.

[frogmarch]

4. Regardless of her reason

for sending you the message, I think you should move on.

Sorry she let you down. It's happened to me too, and it's not fun.

[kimi]

5. I agree with the others

whether it's true or not, she's made things clear, and you need to move on. Seems to me that she might have told you in person, but people do weird things when it comes to relationships.

[Ruby the Liberal]

6. I think it is polite.

Whether she just wasn't interested or indeed meet up with an old flame, really doesn't matter, IMO.

She reached out to you with respect, which is a world of difference away from how it could have ended.

Agree with the above on thanking her for her honesty and moving on. You will then be remembered as the "class act ex" whose dignity is intact.

Sorry that happened. I have been there and it sucks.