About lunch with Kali on Monday:

[MiddleFingerMom]

.
#1. The waitress that kicked my ass was no mere 100-pounder... she was 110-115 if she was a pound.
.
#2. That "girly-turista drink" woulda fucking FLOORED Bukowski or H.S.Thompson... it only made me
a blithering idiot.
.
#3. Kali didn't hear me giving the manager at WallyWorld fair warning: "Don't MAKE me take my pants
off... you wouldn't LIKE me with my pants off."
.
#4. Kali is a friend/cohort/partner-in-crime/inspiration that ANYONE would be BEYOND lucky to have.
.
And, NO... I am not still drunk!!!
.
.
.
Kinda.
.
.
.
It was so much fun!!! Kali and I laugh a lot when we get together (I want to thank all you folks for being
such easy "butt-of-the-joke" targets.
.
And, PHEW... it HAS been years since I've had anything more to drink than a glass or two of red wine
(I call it "fireplace in a bottle), but DAMN -- that bartender was EVIL!!!!
.
I like him/her. I like him/her a LOT.
.
We went to my favorite Mexican restaurant here in Tucson (and it's only 8 blocks or so from my house),
The Guadalajara Grill. Selections from several different regions of Mexico -- a fair seafood selection (most
places here offer a pretty run-of-the-mill Sonoran-inspired menu). It's a shame we couldn't go at dinner.
Little, plump middle-aged Mexican women in traditional peasant dress wheel a cart to your table and make
your salsa to order from scratch (free -- with a mortar-and-pestle!!!) and they have a three- or four-piece
wandering mariachi band moving amongst the tables.
.
This place was about two blocks further away and moved to the new location because business was SO
good (and Tucson's quality restaurant business is floundering just like everywhere else right now) that
they needed a bigger location.
.
The menu is below. Under the "Fresca Margeritas", I got the frozen Bandera Margerita and Kali got the
House Margarita on the rocks. She would seriously be at home with 19th Century Mexican bandits
slugging mescal straight from the bottle while I (as you can see from the photos) am "all about the girly".
.
Kali got the Molcajetes Camarones (shrimp) from the Molcajetes section and I got the Platos Banderas
from the Classic Combos. I ordered the wrong appetizer to split -- they have this fucking HEAVENLY
creamy mushroom white sauce dip for tortillas that I order every time I go there, but I ordered the
cheese-and-chorizo dip (without the chorizo) that was pretty much just melted cheese (not altogether
bad). Lots of tortillas, both corn and flour.
.
ENORMOUS portions!!! I don't think either of us finished half of ours.
.
"Would either of you like dessert?"
.
Now, 'fess up... wouldn't that provoke YOU into starting a fistfight with a waitress?
.
.
http://guadalajaraoriginalgrill.com/menu/
.
.
.
DAMNED goodtimes!!!!!
.
.
.
Kali's original post:
.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018331975
.
.
.

[GentryDixon]

1. I enjoyed Kali's post yesterday.

It looks like you had a grand time.

[pinboy3niner]

2. That was some great story-telling by Kali

And great photos. The food looked wonderful--I was drooling over the pics! And your drink sounded not half-bad when we learned what it was.

Glad you had a good time (you sure LOOKED like you were, too! ).

[Tuesday Afternoon]

3. I like this part the best:

It was so much fun!!! Kali and I laugh a lot when we get together (I want to thank all you folks for being
such easy "butt-of-the-joke" targets.

my sweet ass got laughed about no doubt

yeah, I'm conceited like that

[Kali]

4. hey, did you get your internet fixed?

I thought for sure this was going to say "Kali LIES!" again

[MiddleFingerMom]

6. Nah -- still out and the housemate is even weirder. I'm at the library...

.
.
.
... and I've decided to try not to stress about no home connection at all -- fuck it. It'll happen when it happens...
I've done what I could.
.
I need to move -- I'm still looking. A cat and A/C during the monsoon months -- is that too much to ask?
.
And a relatively normal person/people to deal with -- this place is a weirdo magnet.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Um, you know... I'm here n' stuff.
.
.
.

[panader0]

11. Hey, I've been to that place!

Don't get to Tucson much, vehicles and gas cost too much. I'm outside Sierra Vista. We have a pretty good Mexican restaurant here (Ricardo's). Come on down, we'll round up Kali's crew, and me and Jeannie'll take you to eat.

[Kali]

14. hmmm not sure I like that

since it is kind of your only connection in an emergency...

want ME to call the landlord

[Phentex]

5. Must have been fun to see The Awesome Kali in person!

[pinboy3niner]

7. Heh heh

Too late! No do-overs! (Nice try, though.)

[MiddleFingerMom]

8. She IS awesome!!! And seriously... many's the time I've thought "WWKD?"

[Kali]

12. hahaha

[Grateful for Hope]

9. It's so good to hear that both of you had such a good time.

[bluesbassman]

10. Both of you are peeps I would gladly flop down next to on the jail cell bench...

and say: "Man! That was fun!".

[MiddleFingerMom]

13. About a year after I got out of the Army (around '79-80), I moved back to my hometown....

.
.
.
... to regroup and get my shit together.
.
I kinda accidentally got a job tending bar. I had been drinking at the bar and talking to the bartender and
one of the waitresses all night. When I told her that I was job-hunting, the bartender told me that they
were looking for another bartender. She told me to wait and came back about 10 minutes later and told
me that the manager would give me an interview right then upstairs. I went upstairs and, despite having
absolutely NO experience as a real bartender (other than slinging beers at a beer-only joint down South),
it was the easiest interview I've ever had and I was hired on the spot (I found out later that the bartender
and the waitress had told the manager that if he DIDN'T hire me, they would make his life a living hell --
sweethearts, for sure).
.
About 6 months into the job, I bought a little teeny-weeny motorcycle for transportation (a Yamaha 175cc,
I think). It was the dead of winter and I rode it from where I bought it toward my folks' house (where I
could store it until I got insurance and paperwork). The streets were covered in snow. Red-and-blue flashing
lights come on behind me. No papers. Fuck. Back in highschool, we were underage riders and ran from the
cops alla time to disappear into nearby woods. I had a flashback and cranked on the gas. 10 seconds into
the "high-speed chase" (I was bent flat over on a Yamaha fucking 175 trying to coax 45 MPH out of it), I
realized what an IDIOT I was... but it was too late. Five minutes later, I dumped the bike trying to jump a
ditch to get to those old "OLLIE-OLLIE-IN-FREE" woods. The bike stalled, so I just stood still with my back
to the cop (who bolted out of his car towards me) with my hands extended out to my sides. He SLAMMED
me in a tackle and cuffed me. put me over the hood of his car and we waited about 5 minutes for two
plainclothes detectives.
.
"Is this your boy?"
.
Nah. They were looking for a kid on a bike who had been using a stolen credit card at the mall. I was
arrested and went down to the station. The strip-search found the half-a-joint in my pocket ("You're in
enough trouble without THIS!" and they took it around the corner and flushed it -- uh-huh).
.
Sitting in the big holding cell on the bench when a kid who had been there when I came in comes over and
sits down beside me. "Whatcha in for?"
.
Me: "Fleeing-and-eluding on a motorcycle. You?"
.
"Using a stolen credit card down at the mall."
.
.
.
.
.
.
GET... THE... FUCK... AWAY... FROM... ME... NOW!!!!!
.
.
.
Needless to say, I was NOT glad to flop down next to him.
.
Eventually, all was knocked down to a "violation of basic speed law ticket" -- $25 fine and a point on my license.
.
The night court judge had just released me on my own recognizance. The bar manager had sent down that same
bartender and waitress with bail money, if needed. I was coming out the door as they were coming in. I looked
over my shoulder and whispered, "QUICK... they don't realize that I've escaped!!!" and ran for the parking lot.
.
They were right behind me, begging me to go back. "IT'S NOT WORTH IT!!!"
.
We get to the bar (a live rock-and-roll joint). The manager had explained to the crowd and arranged for the band
to play "Jailhouse Rock" when I came in -- the crowd gave me a standing O. He gave me the night off and the
staff all pampered me (free-of-charge) for the whole night.
.
.
.
WORTH IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
.
.
.

[dixiegrrrrl]

16. It just dawned on me...

YOU are the original Dude, aren't you??

[GeorgeGist]

15. I'm hungry.