Florida: You are officiallly off the hook (as in: no longer on the hook)

[ashling]

Police: Arizona man crashed car during drunk sex and then hid in cactus

Briones ran a red light and struck another car, throwing his naked companion from the vehicle.

“Mr. Briones was observed to be having sexual intercourse with the passenger and sped off… at a high rate of speed,” a criminal complaint obtained by Albuquerque Journal said. “Their activities presented a danger to others in the roadway as exhibited by the accident.”

***

The report said that Briones tried to flee but a witness took his car keys. Police later found Briones hiding in cactus with his shorts inside out. The complaint stated that he refused to cooperate with police and became hostile with paramedics. Police said that he also refused to wear his pants while inside the patrol car.

[LiberalEsto]

1. Obviously MFM's influence is spreading far and wide

"refused to wear his pants while inside the patrol car."

Need I say more?

[CrazyOrangeCat]

4. DUzy!

Indeed. MFM is a cultural tsunami, sans pants.

[Fla Dem]

2. I'm beginning to think Arizona and Florida were twins separated at birth.

Both their state names have 7 letters.
They both end in "a".
They share 4 out of their 7 letters A, R, I & O.

They both have whacked out Governors.....Jan Brewer and Rick Scott.
They both have one really old Senator...John McCain and Bill Nelson.
They both have one really flaky Senator....Marco Rubio and Jeff Flake

Both have really, really weird and strange people living there who do really weird and strange things.

[Baitball Blogger]

3. This story sounds too sexy for Florida.

Usually, our stories have to do with intellectual dishonesty.

[jakeXT]

6. Only socks and shoes for Florida

The deputy arrived and saw the man, later identified as Robert John Judy, standing along State Road 16 wearing only shoes and short black socks -- and causing traffic congestion, the deputy wrote in his report.

Judy was also drunk, according to the arrest report.

When the deputy tried to put Judy in the patrol car, the 58-year-old man allegedly tensed up, pulled away from the deputy and then tightened his arms to prevent the deputy from placing his hands behind his back.

The report also identified Judy as a sexual offender.
http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/strange/floriduh-blog/sfl-flduh_busy-road-while-totally-naked-20130528,0,3930416.story

[TrogL]

7. Probably the socks causing the problem

Black socks should be at least calf length.

[hay rick]

23. Black socks after Memorial Day?

Jerk.

[Sekhmets Daughter]

5. OMG! What if some of this is contagious?

I think I will have to leave FL...

[Moondog]

8. See post #6 -

it might come down to what sort of impression you make when you are sort of blotto, and standing by the side of the road when your entire ensemble consists of shoes and short black socks . . . .

I'd probably be deemed to be fashion challenged, and required to leave. People would take up a collection to make sure that this was done. I'd probably be escorted by State Troopers to the state line, bodily tossed across, and gruffly told "and don't come back!"

Hmmmm. Georgia, or Alabama? Tough call . . . .

[Sekhmets Daughter]

9. And are you inclined to stand by the side of road so sartorially challenged?

That's what I want to know!

[Moondog]

10. Inclined?

Well, supposedly it pays to advertise.

But I was brought up to be modest. So, I guess, no.

Not by the side of the road, anyway.

[Sekhmets Daughter]

11. Ah ha... So I guess Disney World is out as well?

Some other venue? The everglades, perhaps?

[Moondog]

12. Yep, Disney World would be out.

The Everglades too. The damned mosquitos are voracious.

Upon reflection, the choice of venue will require a great deal more consideration . . . .

[Sekhmets Daughter]

13. Perhaps something less outdoorsy?

The local mall!

[Moondog]

14. Bwwaahhhaaahaha!

Can't you just picture the Rent-A-Cops?

Carrying off some loon with his dangly bits flapping in the breeze, yelling "you're just jealous" at the RACs?

[Sekhmets Daughter]

15. Whoo hoo...so the RACs would be jealous

of the dangly bits, would they? Interesting....

[Moondog]

16. If you will look back, madam, to the previous post you

will see that I used the phraseology "some loon", as opposed to this particular loon, as in me.

I would never be so crass as to publicly discuss my particular bits.

Edit to add - That's my story, and I'm sticking to it!

[Sekhmets Daughter]

17. I was simply commenting on the,.... fantasy

However, it would be remiss of me to fail to point out the implications of "not by the side of the road anyway"

[Moondog]

18. Heh.

"Remiss" is it?

It is hell to be cited against oneself.

[Sekhmets Daughter]

19. Indeed it is!

[RebelOne]

20. Glad I do not live there any more.

But Georgia, where I live now is not much better.

[Sekhmets Daughter]

21. What keeps me here

is that my children were pretty much raised here and have made lives for themselves here. My son most particularly, college, law school and now practicing in Miami...about 80 miles south of me. Anywhere I would want to live is way far away... Back to NJ or another northeastern state. I am resigned. <sigh>

[Callmecrazy]

22. Hey! I resemble that remark!

And get off my lawn!

[Incitatus]

24. Well, there's not much cacti in Florida. nt