Let the dwile flonking begin!

[mahatmakanejeeves]

What?

Cotswold Olimpick Games

Since 1966 the Games have been held each year on the Friday after Spring Bank Holiday. Events have included the tug of war, gymkhana, shin-kicking, dwile flonking, motorcycle scrambling, judo, piano smashing, and morris dancing. The British Olympic Association has recognised the Cotswold Olimpick Games as "the first stirrings of Britain's Olympic beginnings".

[Aristus]

1. If anybody flonks my dwile,

I'm gonna be real upset!...

[madinmaryland]

10. Huh? My wife flonks my dwile. Who is flonking your dwile???

[Arugula Latte]

15. Do you feel Olimpick stirrings when she does that?

[HappyMe]

2. It sounds like fun to me!

They already had the cheese chasing elsewhere. Here's an old video.

[LiberalEsto]

3. Dwile Flonking

Wikipedia definition:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dwile_flonking

"The pastime of dwile flonking (also dwyle flunking) involves two teams, each taking a turn to dance around the other while attempting to avoid a beer-soaked dwile (cloth) thrown by the non-dancing team.[1]

"Dwile" is a knitted floor cloth, from the Dutch dweil, meaning "mop",[2] and "flonk" is probably a corruption of flong, an old past tense of fling.[3]"

Rules:

"According to the Friends Of The Lewes Arms, "The rules of the game are impenetrable and the result is always contested."[4]

A 'dull witted person' is chosen as the referee or 'jobanowl' and the two teams decide who flonks first by tossing a sugar beet. The game begins when the jobanowl shouts "Here y'go t'gither!" "

... "A full game comprises four 'snurds', each snurd being one team taking a turn at girting. "

[dixiegrrrrl]

6. "The rules of the game are impenetrable"

my favorite kind of game!

[KamaAina]

9. So who's the jobanowl this year?

Bush**? Palin? Bachmann?

Come to think of it, it must be Bachmann. That's why she quit, 'cause they wouldn't give her time off to go to the Cotswolds.

[LiberalEsto]

11. How do they tell who flonks by tossing a sugar beet?

I hope I don't dream of flonking sugar beets tonight.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

18. "A 'dull witted person' is chosen as the referee or 'jobanowl'...."

So THAT's where that word comes from. I thought he - I mean, I - made it up.

The Bank Dick - Highlights

In talking Og into embezzling from the bank and encountering resistance, Egbert says: "Don't be a luddy duddy, Don't be a moon calf. Don't be a jabbernowl. You're not those, are you?" (Fields, whose ear for the preposterous-sounding phrase, word or name was unparalleled, claimed to have found the words in a dictionary.)

ETA: to maintain my reputation, I have edited the page. Next up: luddy duddy and moon calf.

[Phentex]

4. So THAT'S where MFM is!

although I'm sure he does not mind being soaked in beer...

[olddots]

5. Where is Monty Python when we need them ?

The British know how to cheaply entertain themselves better than Americans .

[dixiegrrrrl]

7. Morris dancing is actually a fascinating and very old activity.

I ran across the term while reading some British something or the other awhile back.
May I share?:

Morris dance is a form of English folk dance usually accompanied by music. It is based on rhythmic stepping and the execution of choreographed figures by a group of dancers, usually wearing bell pads on their shins. Implements such as sticks, swords and handkerchiefs may also be wielded by the dancers. In a small number of dances for one or two men, steps are performed near and across a pair of clay tobacco pipes laid across each other on the floor.

English records date back to 1448, when 7 shillings were paid to morris dancers by the Goldsmiths' Company in London Further mentions of morris dancing occur in the late 15th century, and there are also early records such as visiting bishops' "Visitation Articles" mention sword dancing, guising and other dancing activities, as well as mumming plays. Furthermore, the earliest records invariably mention "Morys" in a court setting, and a little later in the Lord Mayors' Processions in London.

In modern day, it is commonly thought of as a mainly English activity, although there are around 150 morris sides (or teams) in the United States.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Morris_dance

[KamaAina]

8. I used to have some friends who were morris dancers

I'm not sure how it could be made competitive. I guess it'd have to be judged, like gymnastics or figure skating.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

12. Dwile Flonk

my next DU username.

[rug]

13. Dwile Flonk Tuesday Afternoon Delight

[Tuesday Afternoon]

17. it could be so much worse

[nolabear]

14. My next minor novel character. If Gomer Pyle can make it...

[Tuesday Afternoon]

16. perfect! Do send me a copy at my expense, please!