Close call at work. Major traumatic experience. Hold me!

[Denninmi]

I almost dripped the oil from all-natural peanut butter on my shirt and tie.

Those bastards, making me stir it all in before I eat it. They know or should have known for the potential harm this could cause. Theory of proximate cause says this should be highly foreseeable.

Wow, life's big traumas sure can be rough.

[easychoice]

1. At least it wasn't Jif or Skippy....ewww

[Manifestor_of_Light]

16. Jif and Skippy are gross. Ewww!!!

[Raffi Ella]

3. lol, It's such a pain in the ass to stir it.

Apparently I didn't stir mine well enough and used too much of the dry. I'm left with a drippy oily mess. I'm going to have to use it for cookies or something and buy a new jar.

[winter is coming]

13. What I do about that: when you bring home a new jar, store it upside-down for a few days

if possible. Using a narrow rubber spatula, empty the jar into a bowl with 2-3 times the capacity of the jar, then stir well, re-fill the jar, and stick it in the fridge.

on edit: if you've been keeping a jar at work, I'd suggest taking in a smaller plastic container with just a little peanut butter, so you can stir it up easily as you use it.

[In_The_Wind]

5. ffs

[Denninmi]

6. Wel, it's an expensive tie.

With a $65 original price tag. Which I picked up at a Goodwill store for $3.

[Phentex]

7. LOL!

Whew!

[Wait Wut]

8. You should sue them.

Force them to add a label:

Peanut Butter MUST be stirred while NAKED to avoid nasty spills on shirts and ties!

[antiquie]

9. Here you go...

[elleng]

10. OH DEN,

[Denninmi]

15. Was I bad?

[elleng]

20. bad, not BAD!!!

[CaliforniaPeggy]

11. My dear Denninmi!

You know, if you go in a place like Whole Foods, you can grind your own peanut butter, and you will never have to stir in the oil!

It won't have a chance to separate!

[Denninmi]

22. I love Whole Paychecks.

Despite the prices.

[R B Garr]

12. I think you're supposed to sprinkle a few tablespoons of sugar over that oil

It should soak it right up.

[MiddleFingerMom]

14. Cocaine.

.
.
.
NopeholdthecoffnocoffeeformethismorningTYVMnopejustdon'tneeditwideawakenojavaforthekidthisA.M.!!!
.
.
.

[R B Garr]

17. ? I think you posted this in the wrong place.

Or are you saying that peanut butter is like cocaine? I've never had cocaine, but I do love peanut butter!

But in case the smilies didn't give away that I was kidding: this OP poster has indicated he is health conscious. If you're health conscious, you probably read labels. If he bought all-natural peanut butter, he probably didn't want the sugar in the more popular brands. If you read the label on peanut butter like Jif, for instance, sugar is the second ingredient. Hence the smilies about adding sugar to help emulsify the oil with the peanuts.

FWIW, I have ground my own peanut butter at places like Whole Foods and Mother's. It definitely tastes like there is no sugar, which is fine. I like it; it's good; I didn't want the sugar then. But my SO and I teased that we could just stir some sugar in so we get it to taste more like the big brand names that have sugar. We were just teasing one another. We don't actually stir sugar in.

[Denninmi]

23. Well, sir, if it's a little hint of Coke you need to get through the days.

You can always dye your hair.

http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/tressant-supreme/n11749/

Link is to an extremely funny commercial parody starring Kelly Ripe of "Live with Kelly and Michael" fame.

Tressant-Supreme, now with traces of crack cocaine.

"I can color my hair 3, 4, 5 times a day, and it never gets dry or brittle".

Hilarious, you would like it.

[The Straight Story]

18. Store the jar upside down

Problem solved

[DebJ]

19. Jif Natural Peanut butter has less than half the sodium, and doesn't require much stirring at all.

We think it tastes great. It is real peanut butter, not that plastic-like crap in most jars, filled with all kinds
of god-knows-what.

There is very little oil that rises to the top.

[RobinA]

21. I Stick With

peanut butter the way god intended it - homogenized. I grew up with that oily, gritty cement and I hated it. The texture, the mess, the taste... This peanut butter lover loves Jif.