A joke I like

[Recursion]

So, three graduates of the Texas A&M (or insert your butt of jokes here) criminology program are interviewing for a job with an FBI agent. The agent wants to get a sense of their acumen, so he shows them a single (profile) photo of a suspect from a recent case, and says, "what can you tell me about the subject?"

The first one looks at the profile photo and says, "He only has one ear."

"You idiot. Get out."

The second one looks at the same profile photo and also says, "He only has one ear."

"What the hell is the matter with you people? Go away."

The second rejected applicant, feeling generous, talks to the incoming third applicant. "Don't say 'he has one ear'; that seems to piss him off."

The FBI agent, disconsolate, asks the last applicant, "what can you tell me about the subject."

The criminology grad squints, stares for a bit, and says, "the subject wears contacts."

The FBI agent blinks, looks at the file, and, in fact, the subject did wear contacts.

Impressed, he asks, "how did you know that? could you actually see them? Was it something about his facial expression? His criminological profile?"

Irritated, the grad says, "well, obviously he couldn't wear glasses. He only has one ear."

[fizzgig]

1. ha!

[rurallib]

2. ! yes!

[frogmarch]

3. good one!

Mr. froggy and I are still laughing.

Got any more?

[jmowreader]

4. You may like this one too

A young man was taking Sheep Science at Texas A&M, and enrolled in Meat Sheep Production 101. On his first day he was given the course syllabus: you will bring in a sheep, raise it to market weight and sell it. Since sheep cannot be purchased with scholarship money and college students are broke, he decided to get someone to give him one.

A day of driving the back roads around San Angelo brought him to a sheep farm, where he approached the proprietor: "Sir, I am a poor college student who has to raise a sheep for class. If I can tell you exactly how many sheep you have without counting them, may I have one?" The farmer agreed. The kid stands in the bed of his truck, looks around for a minute, jumps out and says, "Sir, you have 252 sheep."

"Well, I'll be damned. How did you do that?"

The kid goes into this long discourse on the maximum density for sheep on a plat of land when the farmer stopped him. "Son, I'm just a simple farmer. Those things don't matter to me, but go ahead and pick yourself out one."

The kid wades into the flock, selects an animal and begins to go back to his truck. "Son, wait. Like to play double or nothing?"

"What do you mean?"

"If I can guess what university you attend I get the animal back, and if I can't you can have two. Fair enough?"

"Yes."

"You go to Texas A&M University."

"How did you know THAT?"

"You're carrying my dog."