all I can think of is MFM would have HOWLED

[Kali]

as some may remember, I had to have a surgery on my leg last summer. well the wound kind of stalled on healing after October. I am not sure where November went, but in December I realized the damn thing was not moving so I saw the surgeon and he sent me to a (new) wound clinic for the past month or so. They have been debriding and trying to get it to do something (and culturing and ct scan and consulting with another surgeon, blah blah blah). There is no infection of any kind, the thing is filled in but the edges got stalled and there is a lot of scar tissue.

Today they decided we will try a small skin graft when I go back next week (gotta get the OK from insurance). I am just ready for SOMETHING to happen, was even ready for a entire start-over if they have to remove all the scar and trim the skin to get it moving again. But the case manager suggested this. So I ask (as I am worried about a second wound that I would have to deal with) where would they take the skin? from my other leg? and the Dr. says "oh, no it is a manufactured product. made from foreskins." I must have made a funny face (even though by now she knows I am kind of weird and would find this all very interesting) because she said "don't worry you won't grow a penis out of your leg"

BWAHAAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!! I actually had tears well up because I could just HEAR Jim guffawing about this. Can you see the multiple posts and images he would be putting together to give me shit about this?

http://archive.wired.com/science/discoveries/news/1999/02/17912

The tissue-engineered skin is derived from post-circumcision human neonatal foreskin. According to a special report in the December issue of the Journal of the American Academy of Dermatology, the cells of one foreskin can be expanded to an area the size of five to six football fields and generate 250,000 skin products.

I think that factoid would generate a few jokes too.

In all of DU's circumcision wars I don't ever remember reading about THIS!!!

[rug]

1. Is your leg itchy

or are you just happy to see me?

[kentauros]

21. That gives new meaning to

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Restless Leg Syndrome

[rurallib]

2. yes he would have.

Reminds of that very old joke from my kid days.

Which stretches further rubber or skin?
Answer: Skin - it says in the bible that Joseph tied his ass to a tree and walked to town.

[GeorgeGist]

3. Will you have to take viagra?

[Scruffy Rumbler]

4. Just to get the limp out.

[Ptah]

5. don't worry

you won't grow a penis

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

out of your leg

[Iggo]

6. Oooooh, man! MFM woulda got some mileage out of that one!!!

[kentauros]

23. Don't you mean yardage?

one foreskin can be expanded to an area the size of five to six football fields

[Iggo]

24. Boi-oi-oi-oi-oing!!!

[progressoid]

7. This why I love DU.

[progressoid]

8. Also reminds me of an old Buddy Hackett joke.

Guy goes into his doctor's office. A mysterious dot in the middle of his forehead has shown up.

Doctor sees him and says, "Oh my god! I've never seen this before, but I read about it in medical school."

Guy says, "So doctor...what is it?"

He says, "In six weeks, you'll have a penis growing out of your forehead."

Guy says, "Well doctor, cut it off!"

Doctor says, "I can't cut it off, it's attached to your brain. You'd die."

"So doctor, what you're telling me is that in six weeks, every morning when I get up and look in the mirror I'm gonna see a penis growing out of my forehead?!"

Doctor says, "Oh no, no, no, you won't see it. The balls will cover your eyes."

[MrMickeysMom]

9. That's hilarious….

Smooth as
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

Old Toby's Ass

[HeiressofBickworth]

10. Yup, MFM would have a blast with this one!

On a serious side, after my kidney surgery last year, the wound wasn't healing very well but wasn't infected. The visiting nurse service I had at home used Medi-honey, a medicated pad made of seaweed and honey, to speed the healing. It was changed twice a week. At first the pad sloughed off the dead skin around the edges of the wound which was causing the stall in healing; then new skin started to grow over the spot. It took about 5 weeks, but it eventually healed without out any further surgical procedures. Of course, I have no way of knowing if this would be beneficial for you, but I thought I would let you know that it's available.

[panader0]

11. Hilarious

Reminds me of a friend's girlfriend who had to have A bone donor for her mouth so that she could have a tooth implanted.
He started calling her boner donor...
I hope all goes well--How many foreskins will you need?

[greatauntoftriplets]

12. He would have loved that and made much hay....

Hell, I think it's hilarious. I also hope that it works and your problems with this are gone forever.

[LiberalEsto]

13. So when your leg rises unexpectedly and sticks straight out,

how will you explain this to other people?

[riderinthestorm]

14. I had no idea the wound was still problematic.

Penis jokes aside, I'm bummed it's still not healed yet. Hope the surgery goes smoothly!

[Phentex]

15. Yes, he would have had a field day with this!

One can only imagine the photo shopping!

[Raine1967]

16. Be careful, Kali— if you rub it you might

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.


go BLIND!!!

[GoCubsGo]

17. Or, grow hair on the palms your hands!

[Raine1967]

18. Blind and hairy palms!

The humanity!

[pinboy3niner]

19. MFM would have created a training program for you

Lesson 1: Turn your head and cough

[madinmaryland]

20. Heh! Now you know how Tweety feels when he gets a tingle down his leg!!

[kentauros]

22. I guess something good CAN come from circumcision

after all!

I wonder how this will affect Tantra and/or Kama Sutra practices...?