Some day you'll understand...

[Ron Obvious]

A really good friend of mine called me a few hours ago and told me of his terminal cancer diagnosis. He's 60 years old, has three kids, and he's one of the nicest, most decent guys I've ever known -- he'd literally give you the shirt off his back. He also told me that he's credited our conversations with his voting for Obama, Gore, and Clinton, despite his growing up in an extremely conservative household.

He's a self-described Jesus freak, and I sincerely hope his faith helps him through this awful time.

My world is shrinking and I'm finding it difficult to process. Aww Hell, this isn't about me; it's about Dave and his family...

Fuck.

[Tobin S.]

1. I'm sorry, Ron.

I hope you find a way to make your peace with it.

[Ron Obvious]

13. Yeah...

I just don't get what makes me so special that I'm still around despite my self-induced health issues.

[rug]

2. "My world is shrinking"

Ain't that the truth.

Each man's death diminishes me,
For I am involved in mankind.
Therefore, send not to know
For whom the bell tolls,
It tolls for thee.

I'm sorry for this. He sounds like a very good man.

[Ron Obvious]

4. He really is...

You'd really like him. You and I and him and a few beers, we'd have a blast.

[rug]

5. Have one for me when you see him.

To a life well-lived, to a life of caring, not hating.

[Ron Obvious]

7. I will...

Hell, in a hundred years who will care, eh?

It only just occurred to me but I posted that song because Dave sounds EXACTLY like John Fogarty.

[question everything]

3. Sad. This is one bad part of going old - losing family and friends

and even plain acquaintances.

[Kali]

6. that sucks

I am sorry.

[Ron Obvious]

8. Yeah...

MiddleFingerMom and him, they would just have a fantastic time together. It's a really nice thought anyway. Hell, he's still around and I'm a mess...

[UTUSN]

9. "my world is shrinking"

[Ron Obvious]

22. It really is, you know....

All my family and most of my friends are gone. Is getting older really so hard as this? Shit, I suppose I'm the lucky one.

[TexasBushwhacker]

10. Yeah, I'm 58 and my 40th high school reunion is in

2 weeks. Way too many of my classmates have died, and most were from natural causes. It stinks.

[Ron Obvious]

11. I'm about the same age...

What makes us so special, eh, that we're still around? I wish I knew...

[TexasBushwhacker]

12. No good reason

I haven't taken good care of myself at all, other than not smoking and drinking very little. I'm an obese couch potato. But aside from the friends who have died, I have a friend who's already had a hip replacement and my brother that's 6 years younger has had back surgery twice!

[Skittles]

14. get up and start moving, TexasBushwhacker

it's not too late to avoid some nasty stuff

just do it already

[Ron Obvious]

20. Can you kick his ass for me, Skittles?

The bastard isn't supposed to die before me...

[Ron Obvious]

23. I'm sorry TexasBushWacker

Here you are being sweet and all, and I'm just so nasty in return. This isn't like me. It's really not.

I met Dave 30 years ago. He invited me to lunch and I told him I couldn't make it because I was I was moving that weekend. He offered to help me move (a near total stranger), and he meant it too. What a fucking sweetheart. He's much nicer than I am, and people like him shouldn't die prematuraly like this.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

15. I am so sorry, my dear Ron Obvious...

It really sucks to lose your close friends. There's no getting around this fact. I've been there, recently, and I don't know if I'll ever really recover.

It leaves a huge gaping wound in your heart.

I hope you can spend some time with him. Talk, laugh, have a beer, reminisce, all the good stuff. Say what's in your heart. I got to do that, and it really helps.

[Ron Obvious]

17. Thank you, Peggy...

I just wish I understood the rules.... I don't think I understand, really....

(Moved from above)

[CaliforniaPeggy]

18. I'm not sure there are any rules, Ron...

I haven't found any.

Just take care of yourself as best you can, and let the grief come as it will. There is no timetable for grief.

I posted some ideas on how to handle it in the Bereavement group...here's the link, if you want to look: http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=forum&id=1234

I hope looking that group over will help you.

[TexasBushwhacker]

25. I agree. There is no timetable.

Grief is a process and processes take time. I remember when Linda McCartney died, Paul said you don't get over the loss, but you do get through it.

[annabanana]

19. here my friend

[Ron Obvious]

21. Thank you Annabanana...

Sorry for the late response. I just smashed my laptop....

[redwitch]

24. Wonderful.

Thanks for sharing this.