Lovesick and nauseas

[tridim]

Hmmm, how to ask this without asking medical advice? Oh well, delete it if you must. I just don't think a doctor can help with this kind of thing, since I don't want to take anit-anxiety medication.

There is no doubt that I'm lovesick, even though I'm not in love with her yet. I don't know her well enough to say that for certain. However, I do think we might be soul mates and the potential is definitely there. I haven't been rejected, but I haven't been fully accepted either. Hence the lovesickness.

Anyway, I'm queasy 24/7 and it's starting to wear me out. I'm still sleeping, though I do wake up about an hour early every morning due to the queasiness. My appetite is pretty weak, but I'm forcing myself to eat, and I'm eating more veggies and good food. Trying to be proactive, but the nausea still remains.

I just bought some valerian root to help me sleep better, it seemed to help a bit last night.

What did you do to calm these bizarre feelings? Is this just something I have to wait out?

[cbayer]

1. Awww... You are just anxious.

Take a walk, distract yourself, write a poem, read a romance novel.

[tridim]

2. Thanks. I've tried them all..

I write music and the lyrics are flowing like water lately. I think it may not be very theraputic since every word I write is about her. I worry about becoming obsessed. It's all part of the game I guess.

I do take comfort in the fact that even the great Bob Dylan has been lovesick.

Lovesick by Bob Dylan.

I'm walkin' through streets that are dead
Walkin', walkin' with you in my head
My feet are so tired
My brain is so wired
And the clouds are weepin'.

Did I hear someone tell a lie?
Did I hear someone's distant cry?
I spoke like a child
You destroyed me with a smile
While I was sleepin'.

I'm sick of love that I'm in the thick of it
This kind of love, I'm so sick of it.

I see, I see lovers in the meadow
I see, I see silhouettes in the window
I'll watch them 'til they're gone
And they leave me hangin' on
To a shadow.

I'm sick of love, I hear the clock tick
This kind of love, ah, I'm love sick.

Sometimes the silence can be like thunder
Sometimes I wanna take to the road and plunder
Could you ever be true
I think of you
And I wonder.

I'm sick of love, I wish I'd never met you
I'm sick of love, I'm tryin' to forget you.

Just don't know what to do
I'd give anything to
Be with you.

[cbayer]

3. Most of us have been lovesick and I don't think there is a cure.

It's good that you are able to sleep and I wish for you the best of all possible outcomes.

I had to take a 2 month road trip by myself the last time. But I landed right where I wanted to be and am now in the place I always hoped to be.

[tridim]

4. Yea, I figured it's common..

I've felt it once before, but it didn't last nearly as long. She is quite special.

Thanks for your advice.

[Warpy]

5. Thank you for making me grateful to be old and past it.

I remember those mad crush, can't-eat-can't-sleep things. I also remember the best way to cope with them is to wait them out if it was one of those stupid things when the crush didn't know I existed and wouldn't appreciate being reminded that I did. Eventually he'd do something awful enough to bust my bubble and I'd get back to normal.

If he did know me, then getting closer was a sure fired cure. (yes, I'm a cynic, why do you ask?) The one time it didn't go away, I ended up marrying him.

You might find that 25 mg. of benadryl at night will help your sleeping a lot more than valerian root does. It's one of those good drugs to keep around in any case, just in case you get poison ivy or hives as well as love sickness. You can also consider melatonin, a natural hormone. It's over the counter. A quarter of a tab does me, natural amounts in our bodies are measured in micrograms, not milligrams. Neither of these things will hurt you in any way.

The treatment for that upset stomach is small, frequent meals. You're already doing the right thing of not turning to junk food. You'll be eating a bit less for the duration, so you'll want to make it as high quality as possible.

Also realize whether or not this turns out to be a mutual thing, the emotional rollercoaster, anorexia and insomnia will fade. Our bodies are designed to make us asses over each other, not to starve us to death over it.

[tridim]

6. Thanks for that.. Though I'm not young.

Just lucky, I guess, that I've never fallen so hard for anyone. I'm proof that even middle aged folks get lovesick.

I have had many conversations with myself about all the possible outcomes, and I have convinced myself that whatever happens, happens. I know enough about love to not have expectations, I keep it limited to hope.

[dixiegrrrrl]

11. Melatonin works well, but.....

I had to stop using it because it increased my heart rate, and I already have a too fast heart rate problem.
Had no clue it was the melatonin till I looked it up.
Valerian root ( 500 mg tab) has been studied and reported to work as well as 5 mg of Valium.
Works well for me, 2 will really help with insomnia, yet not habit forming.
Insomnia is one of those "getting older" things, I found out.

Love sick? definitely creates anxiety.

[tridim]

14. I've been taking it for two nights and so far nothing.

Does it take awhile to kick in?

I kind of like Valerian. It's a nice mild mellow.

[dixiegrrrrl]

17. how much melatonin do you take and how soon before bedtime?

[tridim]

18. I took one 5mg tablet 30 minutes prior, per the directions.

I've been reading that 2-3mg or even less is better. I'll try that tonight.

[dixiegrrrrl]

19. Actually, all the rec's I have read is for UNDER 1 mg. dose.

I also have found I cannot have sugar ( orange juice, or choc, or anything) after 6 or caffeine after 3 in the afternoon if I want to sleep. Damn body turns on ya, past "a certain age".
Now my insomnia is under control, with prescription for a very low dose anti-depressant, which also does a wonderful job at stopping the post shingles pain.

[flamingdem]

7. Imagine this person being a jerk

that might tamp the hormones down a tad!

And it's true, all that glitters is not gold.

Most people have a side that will make you cool off and seek out alternatives!

[tridim]

8. It's amazing how similar humans are. I've tried that too.

I already know she isn't perfect, and she does have some common emotional issues that she talked to me about a long time ago. Not deal breakers.

I am currently seeking alternatives. As stubborn as I am, I know I can't court her forever.

[flamingdem]

9. sometimes there's someone

who helps you get your groove back and you notice others as a result!

[tridim]

10. You're very wise.

Thank you.

[cbayer]

12. How are you doing tridim?

[tridim]

13. Hanging in there. I had a three day weekend and took full advantage.

Yesterday I felt great, and today I feel mostly great. I've been eating like a horse for the past two days.

Still waking up at 5:00am and semi-sleeping until 6:00. It's roughly 6.5 hours, which isn't awful. Melatonin doesn't seem to be working yet.

Of course Monday it's back to work, and her. We'll see what happens.

Thanks for coming back and asking.

[cbayer]

15. Sleeping - check. Eating - check.

I feel for you, though, but both in a good and bad way.

Keeping my fingers crossed.

[tridim]

16. I'm still on the whatever happens, happens plan.

I'm confident (at least today) that I'm going to get past this.