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XanaDUer2

(10,774 posts)
Wed Sep 6, 2023, 11:53 AM Sep 2023

Just got a text from a cousin I was close to

Its been 25 yrs since Wwe communicated. Some stuff happened with his parents when my mom died.

Anyway, I told him I'm disabled, and nothing back. No, are you okay? What happened? We were close as kids.

He contacted me to tell me I'm invited to his mother's 80th bday in ny.

It hurts no one cares

14 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Just got a text from a cousin I was close to (Original Post) XanaDUer2 Sep 2023 OP
I'm so sorry! GPV Sep 2023 #1
Thank you so much nt XanaDUer2 Sep 2023 #6
That really sucks! I hope you hear back from your cousin. 50 Shades Of Blue Sep 2023 #2
I might XanaDUer2 Sep 2023 #7
I know it sounds trite, but... Think. Again. Sep 2023 #3
So true XanaDUer2 Sep 2023 #8
Some people don't know what empathy is - even if you printed out the definition. erronis Sep 2023 #4
That might be XanaDUer2 Sep 2023 #9
Oh, I forgot to add to my previous post: We care! erronis Sep 2023 #5
I love you guys XanaDUer2 Sep 2023 #10
Give it time. We never know what others are going through... No Vested Interest Sep 2023 #11
Here is the lesson I learned about people. Especially 'friends and family'. OldBaldy1701E Sep 2023 #12
Thank you XanaDUer2 Sep 2023 #14
I am so sorry XanaDUer2. Is there there anyone to help you? Are you using government agencies to debm55 Sep 2023 #13

50 Shades Of Blue

(10,064 posts)
2. That really sucks! I hope you hear back from your cousin.
Wed Sep 6, 2023, 12:21 PM
Sep 2023

Some people just don't know how to respond, not that it excuses them.

Have you thought about maybe texting him again and asking him to give your best birthday wishes to your aunt (if you didn't already) and see if he responds to that?

Think. Again.

(8,526 posts)
3. I know it sounds trite, but...
Wed Sep 6, 2023, 12:31 PM
Sep 2023

...I've found that you really can find true family outside of the group of people you happen to be related to.

I only have a legal brother and sister left, but after growing up with them, sharing the experiences of shared parents, all of that, I now find myself not knowing them at all, we never speak, there are still very hard feelings over...I'm not really sure what,.

But, I am an extremely lucky person because I have family that loves me, cares about me, and cares for me.

Sometimes my family and I will sit around the dinner table and share stories of our lives, it's always a warm and wonderful feeling to learn about the life of a person who is soooo close to you!

I met different members of my family at different times, in different circumstances, but somehow we all knew right from the start that yes, this person is family. It wasn't even any kind of surprise.

I've heard people say that you can choose your family and I guess that's what happened, but honestly it just seems like they were my family all along, we just hadn't met yet.

Those other people? The 'legal relative' ones? I don't know them.

erronis

(15,382 posts)
4. Some people don't know what empathy is - even if you printed out the definition.
Wed Sep 6, 2023, 01:16 PM
Sep 2023

And some people don't really read/process replies very well. Age can be a factor, too.

erronis

(15,382 posts)
5. Oh, I forgot to add to my previous post: We care!
Wed Sep 6, 2023, 01:18 PM
Sep 2023

Nice and varied group of people here - all with our own issues - but most are very caring.

OldBaldy1701E

(5,175 posts)
12. Here is the lesson I learned about people. Especially 'friends and family'.
Sat Sep 16, 2023, 07:58 AM
Sep 2023


i have to agree with Think Again that one can find one's real family. Some of us are luckier than others at this. But, you have one here. We care. We want you to be happy and healthy. Our strength is in our diversity and our empathy for each other. That is something that the other side has no concept of.

debm55

(25,599 posts)
13. I am so sorry XanaDUer2. Is there there anyone to help you? Are you using government agencies to
Sat Sep 16, 2023, 02:02 PM
Sep 2023

help you? I wish I could do something to help you out. We love you always remember that.

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