First time in 11.5 years without a dog...the sad farewell...
Hello, pet lovers! Sorry so long but I need to share.
I've been composing this post in my head all week but just haven't been able to bring myself to post until now.
My sweet, giant scare-dy cat of a dog has gone to meet his sister over the rainbow. For the past few months, he had his good days and his so-so days. Some of you may remember his story from 2008 when he nearly died after a reaction to his vaccines. After he survived several hospitalizations and a few blood transfusions, we've sorta known we were on gravy time with him. His blood work hadn't been "normal" since then but he'd been happy and strong.
We lost his sister in 2013 and he was a very different dog after that. Very clingy, very afraid of being alone. He was always one of those giant dogs who was afraid of his own shadow. He could back away from a sock on the floor, was terrified of the vacuum, and never thought to chase a squirrel. Without his companion, he seemed lost. But we had been paying him lots of attention and he truly was spoiled and loved by our whole family and neighbors.
Last week, he began limping on his back legs. He could go down the steps but needed help coming back up. He's been on glucosamine for some time and it had helped. This time, I gave him some bufferin and it helped a little. However, his appetite was down and he seemed more tired than usual. He would eat when my son hand fed him, but looking back now I don't think he rally wanted the food.
I took him to the vet on Saturday (a NEW vet as you may recall the bad feeling I had with the vet last year). This vet was great and actually got down on the floor with him to check him out. To cut to the chase, the blood work was not good and the back legs (especially one with a previous injury) were shot. The vet laid out all the options but given the medical history, we knew this was probably it.
We decided to try rimadyl just to see if it could help. I needed one week. My son comes home from college tomorrow and I wanted ONE week to spoil my baby and prepare for the end and let my son say goodbye. I wanted to have a play date with the neighbor dog. I bought beggin strips which we had never given him before. It was selfishly all about me.
For whatever reason, I could not sleep Sunday night so I stayed downstairs with my bear. He looked tired and just out of sorts. He hadn't moved from the same spot he'd been in most of the day. He drank a little water but that was it. I watched crap tv trying to fall asleep but couldn't. I lay on the floor next to the gentle giant and he just kept lifting his head and looking around. He'd settle a little when I pet him but not fully. In the wee hours, his breathing became labored. He still kept looking around. It seemed to me that he wasn't in any pain but he did seem confused. I have no idea what dogs understand but I like to think they know stuff. I could not stand the thought of him suffering at all so I continued to pet him and told him it was okay to let go...that his sister was waiting to play. What seemed like after only a few minutes, he lay his head down and the breathing slowed. And then it's like he went to sleep. So gently.
I am grateful I could be with him and not have to take him to the vet to be put down, but it still hurts so bad. And now I've got to tell my son when he comes home. 
We are dog people so I don't think it'll be too log before we head to the humane society...meanwhile I still plan to hang out here and look at the cute puppies and cats and other squee photos. 
Here's a pic from around Valentine's Day.
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What a lovely post, and what a beautiful boy. You and your family are in my thoughts.
I sorry.
your squee posts are appreciated.
thanks for caring.
Our dogs are our children whom we love with all our hearts.
they have a way of sneaking in and melting your heart. When they hunker over and put their big head in your lap, you're toast.
it never gets easier to lose a furbaby.
You were with him for his final journey, and I think that's the most important thing. Man, these stories always make me cry. I know how lost you feel without him.
It's comforting to have others who understand.