The 9 Most Baffling Passages in the Bible, and What They Really Mean

[xchrom]

http://www.alternet.org/9-most-baffling-passages-bible-and-what-they-really-mean



***SNIP

9. The Many Begettings

One of the features of the Bible, which have been satirized many times, are the long passages that say things like, "and Salmon begat Booz of Rachab; and Booz begat Obed of Ruth; and Obed begat Jesse." The longest begetting streak is at the beginning of the book of Matthew. It starts with Abraham and ends with Joseph, the father of Jesus. This is puzzling, not just because the Bible is keeping track of people's sex lives, but because it includes Joseph at all. The supposed intention of the passage is to link Jesus, son of Joseph, to Abraham, father of the people of Israel, and yet the entire point of Jesus is that he is God's son by the virgin Mary. Joseph had nothing, biologically, to do with it. If anything, the Bible should be linking Mary with Abraham, and leaving Joseph out of it. Why the many listed begettings?

***SNIP

8. Jesus Gets Mad at a Tree

One day, Jesus is strolling along with his disciples, and he's feeling a little peckish. As Jesus walked, "he saw a fig tree in the way, he came to it, and found nothing thereon, but leaves only, and said unto it, Let no fruit grow on thee henceforward for ever. And presently the fig tree withered away." In another book, which repeats the story, it is stressed that "the time of the figs was not yet." There was no real reason to expect that the tree would have fruit. So it looks like Jesus, the son of god, had a tantrum and wrecked a tree because it didn't have out-of-season fruit for him.

***SNIP

7. What did Ruth Do?

Here's one that only gets more confusing with explanations. Many people know the basic story of the devoted Ruth. When her husband died, she followed her mother in law, Naomi, to Naomi's land and dedicated herself to Naomi's people and faith. This was a problem, as now Naomi and Ruth were living without a lot of money on leased land. Enter Boaz, the wealthy kinsman of Naomi. Naomi had a suggestion for Ruth, instructing that she should, "Wash thyself therefore, and anoint thee, and put thy raiment upon thee, and get thee down to the floor: but make not thyself known unto the man, until he shall have done eating and drinking. And it shall be, when he lieth down, that thou shalt mark the place where he shall lie and thou shalt go in and uncover his feet and lay thee down, and he will tell thee what thou shalt do." Ruth did so, Boaz woke up in the middle of it, and she and Boaz got married soon after that.

***SNIP

6. Beware of dogs! And circumcision!

A surprisingly small amount of the Bible is actually dedicated to what Jesus did and said. After that's over, the rest of the book consists of letters from various apostles to various groups of followers. The most famous (and extensive) correspondence is that of Paul. If you read through them, you'll notice a trend. At first, Paul talks about circumcision in reassuring tones. He explains that circumcision is fine - and he himself performed one on Timothy, whose mother was an ethnically Jewish convert and whose father was Greek - but it's not mandatory. Feel free, he says, to abstain. After a time, Paul cools on the idea, saying that people should concern themselves with the spiritual, not the physical. Towards the end of his letters, though, you get lines like, "Beware of dogs, beware of evil workers, and beware of the circumcision." It's like they're all going to jump out at you from a closet.

[Jim__]

1. Interesting. My understanding of literature is that interpretation is up to the reader.

Last edited Mon Dec 16, 2013, 03:49 PM - Edit history (1)

I realize that religious people consider the bible to be more than literature. Do theologians think that there is one correct interpretation of biblical stories? It seems richer to me if the stories are open to interpretation. For instance, I can't disagree with her interpretation of the story about the fig tree, but it does seem to me that there's more there than just her explanation.

[edhopper]

2. If you look at the Bible

as literature, and criticize it the same way you would Moby Dick or Shakespeare, that is fine. The problem is too many people think it is an instruction book from God, therefore the interpretation has serious ramifications.

[Act_of_Reparation]

5. To a degree, perhaps...

One can bicker over what Billy Budd meant by "God knows" until the cows come home, but not every word put to paper is so vague as to offer myriad defensible interpretations. If somebody reads Huck Finn and interprets it to be an endorsement of slavery, or treatise on nineteenth century riverine navigation, then they are wrong.

[longship]

3. They missed the "night of the living dead" in Matthew.

After Jesus dies, an earthquake ensues and the graves open up and their residents get up and go for a walk-about around Jerusalem. As Matt says, they were seen by many.

And then there's the entire book of Revelation, which is probably best read while on LSD.

R&K

[cbayer]

4. There is some pretty funny stuff in there.

Thanks for the post!

[okasha]

6. Some answers:

9. Ancient Jews were a tribal/clan-organized society. Clan-organized societies by definition value lineage. Hence the "begats." (For modern examples, see Native Americans and Scots.)

8. Jesus had a temper. It's hard to read the story about driving the money-changers out of the Temple without coming to this conclusion. Suggest you read The Passion of Mary Magdalen, by Elizabeth Cunningham, in which MM heals the tree.

7. "Feet," like "thigh" is a euphemism for "manly parts," which is in turn a euphemism. . ..

6. The "beware of dogs . . .and beware of the circumcision" passage refers to the leadership of the Jerusalem Church headed by James, brother of Jesus, and the basically Jewish form of Christianity they espoused. Paul had major differences with the Jerusalem mother church, including what seems to be an almost obsessive jealousy of the original 12 apostles. Hence the name-calling. (Too bad there was no DU back then. He could really have laid into Pope Francis.)

[trotsky]

8. Fascinating.

You appear to be as confident as the most ardent fundamentalist that YOUR interpretations are the correct ones.

[meow2u3]

7. About that "beware of dogs"

I read that dog was ancient Jewish slang for a Roman occupier, or a pagan in general, much like today's "goy."