10 offensively terrible dating tips from the religious right

[rug]

Who'd have thought Pat Robertson's ideas about sex and relationships are totally backward. Oh right, everyone

Monday, Jan 6, 2014 06:59 PM EST
Katie Halper, AlterNet

We may have survived yet another war on Christmas. But we must remain vigilant. For the very same secularist, Muslim, homosexualist, communist, atheist freedom-haters who try to take the Christ out of Christmas (and put the melanin into Santa and Jesus) are attacking the very nexus of our entire 2,000-year-old (give or take) Earth: the relationship between man and wife. But have no fear. Below are some handy and holy tips on love, relationships, dating and marriage, which allow you to please yourself (not that way), your mate and your Lord.

1. Girls: Shut up. Justin Lookadoo (how sexy is that name!) is a faith-based dating coach, motivational speaker and former juvenile probation officer (killer combo). His books include “Dateable: Are You? Are They?,” “The Dateable Rules” and “The Dirt on Sex.” Lookadoo’s website offers the following gems:

“Dateable girls know how to shut up. They don’t monopolize the conversation. They don’t tell everyone everything about themselves.”

Shutting up also prevents girls from doing undateable things like asking boys out.
“God made guys as leaders. Dateable girls get that and let him do guy things, get a door, open a ketchup bottle [never thought of that one]. They… let guys be guys. Which means they don’t ask him out!!!!!”

http://www.salon.com/2014/01/06/10_offensively_terrible_dating_tips_from_the_religious_right_partner/

[louis-t]

1. Funny stuff......

[cbayer]

2. What a collection of doozies.

I'm glad she read them and pulled out the best parts.

[cbayer]

3. Here is one that someone posted in GD:

[rug]

4. And this is why I spend more time in the Lounge instead of GD.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018549722

[cbayer]

5. Lol. Four hours is a really long time.

[pink-o]

7. Notice it's a guy posting it.

Gotta love when these troglodytes take it upon themselves to be the source authority on shameful woman behavior.

A psychiatrist could help these idiots far better than some whack job fundie preacher.

[cbayer]

8. It is one of the more bizarre things I have ever read.

I have heard quite of bit of "keep the little woman down", but never this.

[pink-o]

11. After you posted this, it took off on another thread.

Folks are even wondering if it's satire that's not really obvious (defined in UD as a "Poe&quot .

Cuz no one rational could possible really subscribe to that idea! Even the cray cray fundies I've heard don't go that far!

Here:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10024293470

[cbayer]

12. It is, indeed, very poe like.

FWIW, I found it in the DU thread and brought it here. The other member should get credit for the initial find.

[Gothmog]

6. Juanita Jean had fun mocking these idiots a while back

http://www.juanitajean.com/2013/11/14/my-bad/

[struggle4progress]

9. "Let ME open the ketchup bottle, dammit!"

[LeftishBrit]

10. Ugh.