Confessions of an Arab-American Woman

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http://www.policymic.com/articles/17668/confessions-of-an-arab-american-woman

Courtney Poles
Culture,Religion 4 hours ago




I am a Star Wars nerd and a rock climber. I curse, and have a Korean-American boyfriend. I'm also a mostly agnostic Arab-American woman. Five years ago I would have never admitted to the latter part of my identity. Many days I still fight it and many days I throw myself at its doorstep thankful for its respite. I like to think of myself as very open-minded: I’m an advocate of stem cell research, support gay marriage, and am pretty sure I never want children. How is that for stereotypes?

Growing up I learned from my parents all I thought I needed to know about Arab culture: If you’re woman your self-worth is tied to your virginity, and you are not free to do as you please. Men do – and have the right to – hit women; and never trust your female cousins and aunts with your secrets — they will tell your father. These are just a few of the messages I received, and as a result I did everything I could to distance myself from “Those People.”

It has taken me almost 30 years to see the strength in the Arab aspect of my identity, to engage with other Arab-Americans, especially the women. I now have two close Arab-American friends and some acquaintances. For a while there I fancied myself “enlightened” about my identity … until I went to a lecture given by Egyptian-Swiss writer and academic Tariq Ramadan and realized just how much I had to learn.

Dr. Ramadan – who remains cautiously optimistic as to whether or not we are witnessing a true Arab Spring – proposed a framework for deriving solutions to the political unrest in the Middle East. At the lecture I attended he raised points beyond simple vilification of the West; points that centered on geopolitics, Islam, the collective psychology of a nation, education, and a healthy economy. I left his lecture both enlightened and angry to the core.

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