The Onion: Pope Rummaging Through Vatican Basement For Plastic Nativity Scene Figures
Hoping to have all his holiday decorations up by the weekend, His Holiness Pope Francis has spent the past two hours rummaging through the basement of the papal apartments in search of the Vaticans plastic nativity scene figures, sources confirmed Friday.
After climbing over dusty cases of sacramental wine and bins filled with mothballed vestments, the pope reportedly found the sets plywood manger in a corner of the room near the sump pump, though sources noted he has yet to locate all the blow-molded polyethylene representations of the Holy Family and their Christmas visitors.
Oh, come on, wheres the third wise man? the spiritual leader of 1.2 billion Roman Catholics said as he pushed aside several priceless Raphael and Fra Angelico paintings to peer into a cardboard box, aided by the dim light of a bare bulb hanging overhead. I couldve sworn I put him away with everybody else. Theres a ton of donkeys and sheep in here, but a lot of good that does me with only two wise men. Jeez.
I dont have time for this, he added. Ive still got an epistle that needs to be finished.
http://www.theonion.com/articles/pope-rummaging-through-vatican-basement-for-plasti,37608/
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