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2016 Postmortem
Related: About this forumTrump's Bid To Become Born Again Fails As Jesus Turns Down Friend Request
NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)The billionaire Donald J. Trumps bid to become a born-again Christian failed over the weekend after Jesus Christ turned down his friend request, campaign officials have acknowledged.
Jesus, who has not generally been active on Facebook, made a rare appearance on the social network on Monday to announce His decision to ignore the presumptive Republican nominees request for a personal relationship with Him.
In a brief post, Jesus offered the following explanation: Just everything.
Jesus, who has not generally been active on Facebook, made a rare appearance on the social network on Monday to announce His decision to ignore the presumptive Republican nominees request for a personal relationship with Him.
In a brief post, Jesus offered the following explanation: Just everything.
The rest: http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trumps-bid-to-become-born-again-fails-as-jesus-turns-down-friend-request
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Trump's Bid To Become Born Again Fails As Jesus Turns Down Friend Request (Original Post)
The Velveteen Ocelot
Aug 2016
OP
Rut-roh. With Jesus' rejection, can unfriending by the 2 Corinthians be far behind?
pinboy3niner
Aug 2016
#5
Gothmog
(145,291 posts)1. I love good satire
rurallib
(62,418 posts)2. Uh-oh. Jesus gonna be nailed by Donnie on twitter!
Jesus won't see it coming.
Ilsa
(61,695 posts)3. Jesus hates America. Must be an illegal immigrant,
Stealing someone's carpentry job. Donald forgot he brought him over to work on one of his building projects.
DemonGoddess
(4,640 posts)4. bwahahahaha
pinboy3niner
(53,339 posts)5. Rut-roh. With Jesus' rejection, can unfriending by the 2 Corinthians be far behind?
Demsrule86
(68,582 posts)6. Very funny...enjoyed it !!!