Widespread Support for Sending Politicians to Prison for Ninety-Nine Years

[Zorro]

AUSTIN (The Borowitz Report)—Last week’s indictment of Texas Governor Rick Perry has sparked widespread bipartisan support for the concept of sending politicians to prison for ninety-nine years.

While Americans are divided about the merits of the specific charges levelled against Perry, there is near-unanimous agreement that imprisoning politicians for ninety-nine years is an idea worth exploring further, a poll released on Monday indicates.

According to the poll, eighty-seven per cent of voters from both parties agreed that sending politicians to prison for such a lengthy period would “solve a lot of problems” and “make the country safer.”

Additionally, when asked to name one politician they would like to see incarcerated for ninety-nine years, voters easily rattled off a dozen or more such candidates, with some voters naming as many as fifty.

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/widespread-support-sending-politicians-prison-ninety-nine-years

[NV Whino]

1. Works for me.

[brooklynite]

3. ...as long as they're politicians you don't like?

[NV Whino]

4. As long as they're crooked politicians

No matter what color their stripes.

[Voice for Peace]

2. ahh

Borowitz