For anyone who has experienced this horrible emotional abuse, this article is validating.

[FrankfurtCat]

Gaslighting occurs more commonly than most people think, and it can be a calculated, deliberative manipulation to gain and maintain control over a person, or persons. It can directly cause and exacerbate anxiety, OCD, and other negative emotional states.

Lifestyle
Why Gaslighting Is Such a Secretly Sinister Form of Emotional Abuse
Julia Naftulin Fri, Dec 9 1:00 PM PST
Like other types of abuse, gaslighting can happen in all sorts of relationships, including personal, romantic, and professional.

Once in a while, it's normal to have a fleeting moment where you question your own sanity, like when you're severely sleep deprived or stressed out. But if a relationship leaves you constantly second-guessing your own instincts and feelings, you may be a victim of a sophisticated form of emotional abuse: gaslighting. Like other types of abuse, gaslighting can happen in all sorts of relationships, including personal, romantic, and professional.

Ben Michaelis, PhD, a New York City-based clinical psychologist, has worked with victims of gaslighting. For one of his patients—we'll call her Marie—the gaslighting began when her husband shouted another woman’s name during sex. When she tried to discuss the incident with him, he flatly denied what he’d said and told Marie she was hearing things. Marie figured she must have had too much to drink. But then the lying continued: Marie’s husband would change his alibi constantly, and when Marie questioned him, he'd say she was acting delusional. It wasn’t until almost a year later when Marie realized her husband had been hiding an affair the whole time.



Acknowledging you’re a victim of gaslighting like Marie did can be tricky at first, says Michaelis, who is the author of Your Next Big Thing: 10 Small Steps to Get Moving and Get Happy. “Initially, if someone is insisting on a reality that is different from your own, you’ll think, Why was I off that day? Was I tired?” As the gaslighting continues, victims begin to question themselves and their judgment more and more. Michaelis says this can go on for months or even years before they realize they’re being gaslighted. “People who experience gaslighting may show obsessive-compulsive symptoms because they want to constantly check themselves and recheck themselves,” says Dr. Michaelis. The confidence-depleting nature of gaslighting could contribute to increased anxiety in many or all aspects of a victim’s life, not only in the relationship. Many gaslighting victims berate themselves or feel the need to apologize all the time, explains Dr. Saltz.






If you have to stick it out with a gaslighter, though, try to boost your confidence with the support of good friends. “If you’re having a hard time changing the situation, they can bolster your reality otherwise,” says Michaelis. In a work environment, you should also be wary of what information you share with a gaslighter. Michaelis suggests withholding personal life details with a gaslighting co-worker or boss to protect yourself from emotional abuse in the office.

Full article here:

https://www.yahoo.com/style/why-gaslighting-secretly-sinister-form-210000314.html

[resistance2016]

1. Thanks for the article

I found it helpful.