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Top 10 Idiots

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Member since: Wed May 30, 2018, 12:44 PM
Number of posts: 414

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This is the official DU account for the new format Top 10 Conservative Idiots separate from the host account Initech. The new format Top 10 will launch June 13th, 2018 and all posts related to the Top 10 (promos, etc) will be posted from this account only. If you wish to contact the Top 10 you may do so here: E-mail (all questions, concerns, suggestions, and hate mail welcome): Top10ConIdiots@gmail.com Follow the Top 10 on Twitter: @10Idiots A Facebook page will be created shortly. **This account will ONLY be used to post official Idiots editions, promos, and things related to the Top 10. No other posts will come from this account** Top 10 Wiki: https://www.democraticunderground.com/100211322508

Journal Archives

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #10-1: Lauren's Got A Gun Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #10-1: Lauren’s Got A Gun Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! How’s everybody doing? We’re of course still coming to you from this blank, blue void in the back room of a Burbank comedy club. Look at it, it’s so blue, how could you possibly miss it? But we made it everybody!!! Our long national nightmare is finally over! And you know what? People have been asking me what the end of the Trump era feels like, and I got to say it kind of feels like pulling off a scab. It feels very satisfying at first, but it opens up a festering wound that will take a long time to stop bleeding. Pleasant analogy, I know, but then again the last four years have been anything but pleasant. More on that later. Do we have time for the thing? Yes, we actually do have a thing! It feels good! No, not that kind of thing. But it’s really about our show. What are we going to do now that Trump is no longer in power? Well we’re going to continue on for the 10th and 11th seasons, and we’ve got plenty of exciting new content to debut for you including a feature that we’re debuting next week called “Parler Files” where we will dissect for you some of the ridiculously batshit crazy things being said on right wing social media. We might also work on that name. Plus all your favorite segments are coming back for more. OK enough of the intro, we have a lot of idiocy to get to, but first one of my favorite podcasts is from Christopher Titus, and this week on the Armageddon Update, he very clearly spells out what went down at the Capitol Riot and defines the language for those who are too dumb to understand:

Well in the number one slot, we made it everybody! Taking the #1 slot this week is Senate Republicans (1) because the 2nd impeachment and actual trial of our 45th president is getting underway and they’re doing their best to sweep it under the rug! Taking the second slot this week is Tucker Carlson (2) and we ask the question – could his viewers be racist? The answer might surprise you! Taking the third slot this week is our now FORMER president Donald Trump (3) and this is where we send off the Trump administration by taking a look at some of my favorite things that he’s said and done, and I still can’t believe that a sitting president did these things and we survived as a country. Taking the 4th slot this week is Rudy Giuliani (4) and he’s basically admitted all but the fact that Trump was accepting bribes for presidential pardons, and there were a lot of them to dissect, Steve Bannon probably being the most egregious one. Taking the fifth slot this week is the return of our weekly investigative piece, Top 10 Investigates (5) and this week we’re taking a look at Bitcoin failures. Bitcoin has been surging but you got to remember your passwords, folks! In the number 6 slot this week is our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in Holy Shit (6) and this week our resident pastor is going to take a look at predictions from right wing pastors about the forthcoming year 2021 and the Biden administration and well, they’re fucked up. Taking the #7 slot this week, we add Colorado’s Q Anon loving Congresswoman Lauren Boebert (7) to the ever-growing list of People Who Somehow Got Elected! In the number 8 slot this week, we have a new edition of This Fucking Guy, and this week we’re profiling heavy metal guitarist and hardcore Trumpfile Jon Schhaffer (8), founder of the band Iced Earth! In the number 9 (NEIN!!!) slot this week we have our first People Are Dumb (9) of 2021 and we’re going to dedicate it to some of the ridiculously dumb people that participated in the Capitol riot and did it for the selfies! And finally this week is Road To The White House (10) and this week we’re going to talk about Joe Biden’s awe-inspiring inauguration and what to expect in his first 100 days! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]Senate Republicans
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I know what you’re thinking – it’s a new year and we have a new president, right? Wrong! Yes, I know that Joe Biden has officially been inaugurated and he’s already been hard at work reversing most of Trump’s policies, right? Meet the new boss, same as the old boss! No!!! Thank god! We do not need a new boss that’s the same as the old boss. Because the old boss was literally the worst president we’ve ever had. And after going full Avengers Loki on us, he’s now awaiting his Asguard like fate like Loki did in Thor: The Dark World. But I wish he would meet that fate. I really want to see him dragged away in handcuffs for what he did at the Capitol. But that said, conservative republicans in the Senate are doing their best to imitate Leslie Nielsen in The Naked Gun.

Sometimes in Washington, the powers that be will embark on a little bit of political theater. You can always spot it, though, if you look closely enough at what's real and what's not.

In the last days of the presidency of Donald Trump, the Democrats and a handful of Never Trumpers banded together to insist he be impeached, again.

The first impeachment of Donald Trump in 2019 was a witch hunt filled with fabricated charges, unsupported evidence and partisan rancor disguised as legal concern.

I worked against this impeachment, but I will grant it one thing — while wrongheaded, the Democrats had every right to do it and at least pursued it as dictated and foreseen by the Constitution.

Fast-forward to January 2021. A national tragedy occurred when militants, agitators and zealots were convinced and allowed to believe that Jan. 6 could produce any result other than the certification of the electors of President Joe Biden.

Dude, seriously, you almost got killed in a riot incited by your previous president. Is that whole damn party under Stockholm Syndrome or what? They’ve been kidnapped by a dangerous cult and are refusing to do anything about it. But the whole reason for this exercise is to prevent a certfiably insane lunatic like Trump from ever holding office again. So why are they so resistant to the idea? Oh don’t worry, Josh Howley, we’re coming for you next. Look no further than Florida Man himself, Marco Rubio, to provide the lack of answers.

Senator Marco Rubio (R., Fla.) on Sunday called the effort to impeach former President Trump in order to bar him from running for office again “arrogant,” saying “voters get to decide” who is elected.

“I think that’s an arrogant statement for anyone to make,” Rubio responded when asked by host Chis Wallace on Fox News Sunday about whether Trump should be impeached to prevent a future campaign for office.

“Voters get to decide that. Who are we to tell voters who they can vote for in the future?” the Florida Republican asked.

The House is set to deliver the single article of impeachment against Trump on grounds of “incitement of insurrection” to the Senate on Monday, and Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer (D., N.Y.) has said that the impeachment trial will begin the week of February 8.


Yeah true! Well, someone must care enough to put Trump on trial, am I right? Before you go crazy on the Trump impeachment trial, let’s take a minute to assess that there are people on the right who are criminally insane. Don’t worry, we’ll get to Josh Howley in a bit. And they’re not alone, behind door #3 is House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy (R-Obviously). But let’s not overlook the fact that Trump deserves to be punished for the uprising. Oh wait I hear he likes that sort of thing. *shudder*

But since then, he has seemed to walk back his criticism.


In an interview airing Sunday on Gray Television’s “Full Court Press With Greta Van Susteren,” McCarthy insisted he wasn’t changing his tune.

“No, I have not changed in that,” he said.

He stood by his assertion that Trump does bear some responsibility for what happened. But, he added, so does every other person around the country.

“I also think everybody across this country has some responsibility,” he said.

McCarthy then started pointing to Democrats who opposed Trump, Rep. Maxine Waters (D-Calif.), people who are rude on social media and law enforcement authorities who didn’t prepare for the attack as some of the people who were somehow responsible.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait. Wait. Everybody is responsible for what happened at the Capitol? Even me? I want nothing to do with these traitor scumbags. But I thought what happens at the capitol stays at the capitol, right? Oh wait, it’s a riot, it’s not Vegas. What happens there will definitely come back to haunt you for the rest of eternity and that’s not going to be pretty when it eventually catches up to you! But really, with friends like these, who needs enemies?

The Texas Republican senator John Cornyn warned on Saturday that Donald Trump’s second impeachment could lead to the prosecution of former Democratic presidents if Republicans retake Congress in two years’ time.Trump this month became the first US president to be impeached twice, after the Democratic-controlled House, with the support of 10 Republicans, voted to charge him with incitement of insurrection over the assault on the Capitol by his supporters on 6 January which left five people dead.

. . .

After a brief moment of bipartisan sentiment in which members from both parties condemned the unprecedented attack on Congress as it met to formalize Biden’s victory, a number of Senate Republicans are opposing Trump’s trial, which could lead to a vote blocking him from future office.

“If it is a good idea to impeach and try former presidents, what about former Democratic presidents when Republicans get the majority in 2022?” Cornyn, a 19-year veteran of the Senate who last year tried to distance himself from Trump when it seemed his seat was at risk, tweeted at majority leader Chuck Schumer.

Read more: https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2021/jan/23/senate-republican-john-cornyn-impeachment-trump-past-democratic-presidents

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[font size="8"]Fox News
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Here’s the thing guys – if you have to ask if you’re racist, chances are probably good (I’d say 95% with a +-5% margin of error) that you most likely are a racist. Case in point: Last week, Tucker Carlson – a stupid person’s definition of a smart person – asked his viewers to define what a white supremacist really was. But before I get into that, I want to first examine Josh Howley and his criminally batshit crazy Op Ed that he wrote in the New York Post. Before you get mad at me for this, I want you to know that I am sharing this because this will illustrate the point that I’m trying to make in this entry. This is what your average white wing Fox News watching friend / neighbor / coworker is thinking right now.

Have you checked your social credit score lately? You might want to. Mine seems to have taken a nosedive this month. You might want to see how yours is doing.

Everyone knows what a credit score is. But social credit scores are new. They’re the latest corporate import from Communist China, where government and big business monitor every citizen’s social views and statements.

And they’re the latest form of cancel culture in this country, as corporate monopolies and the left team up to shut down speech they don’t like and force their political agenda on America. For those who still believe in free speech and the First Amendment, this is the time to take a stand.

Like the old-fashioned kind of credit score, your social credit requires a lot of maintenance. You’ll need to get good grades in school and stay out of trouble with the law. But that’s just the start — you have to earn your right to live in polite society these days. So if you want to get a good job, stay at hotels and be served at restaurants, you will need to do a few other things. You will need to voice the right opinions. You will need to endorse the right ideas. You will need to conform. That’s what the corporate chieftains tell us, anyway.

Yeah go cue up the world’s smallest violin. See, if you’re mad about being canceled without actually taking the time to examine *WHY* you were canceled, then guess what? You’re part of the problem and not the solution! Yeah thank you blank pre-recorded audience! But that illustrates the point I am making – this is what Trump fans are really thinking right now! Which leads me to Tucker Carlson. This is exactly the “I’m not racist, but…” argument.

Now that we're waging war on white supremacists, can somebody tell us in very clear language what a white supremacist is?

That's not some picayune semantic question -- Joe Biden isn't a high school debate coach. Joe Biden is the new president of the United States. Joe Biden controls the largest military and largest law enforcement agencies in the world. He has now declared war. So we should know specifically and precisely who exactly he has declared war on. We have a right to know that.

Innocent people could be hurt in this war, they usually are. There could be collateral damage in this war. And the casualties will be Americans.

So again, what is a white supremacist? You might be surprised to learn just how broad the definition for that has become.

Bloomberg News has described a wall along our southern border as “a monument to white supremacy." So be certain not to support that.

Whoa, whoa, whoa!!! You can’t just expect to walk back the wall! I mean come on, there’s been rumors that one of your fellow employees, Sean Hannity, had a direct line to Trump every night and was more influential on Trump’s policy than the Joint Chiefs were! Oh and Tucker Carlson isn’t the only one in the GOP questioning the party’s ties to white male racists. I give you Rand Paul, who said that he thinks Biden is calling them racist. Well guess what guys? You kind of sort of are!

Kentucky Sen. Rand Paul quickly criticized President Joe Biden’s inauguration speech on Wednesday, saying Biden was calling Republicans racist.

“If you read his speech and listen to it carefully, much of it is thinly-veiled innuendo calling us white supremacists, calling us racists, calling us every name in the book, calling us people who don’t tell the truth,” Paul said on Fox News Primetime.

Paul said he also thought Biden was calling his political opponents liars.

Paul’s assessment was a sharp contrast to the widespread accolades for Biden’s remarks that predominantly emphasized unity following Trump supporters’ Capitol riot that was set off in part by Trump’s election fraud lies and misinformation. Some Republicans, including Kentucky’s other senator, have called Trump and his acolytes’ comments lies.

Twitter users criticized Paul’s comments, saying that it’s not Biden’s fault if Paul was offended when Biden condemned racism. Some also pointed out Paul’s opposition to an anti-lynching bill last year. Paul said at the time he was worried the bill would “conflate lesser crimes with lynching,” according to Politico.

Really guys! Did you ever stop to think for a minute that it might not be them, it’s you? Because while you’re wondering whether or not you’re a racist, Biden is actively looking into threats from domestic terrorists! So keep asking that question, Tucker, because the next white supremacist you find might actually be the one you see in the mirror. Yes, Boogaloo Bois and Proud Boys, we’re coming for you, and you might want to get used to seeing another color – orange.

The Biden administration is “committed to developing policies and strategies” based on that analysis, bearing in mind “our respect for constitutionally respected free speech and political activities,” she said.

“This is the first step in the process,” she noted.

The administration is also working to boost the National Security Council’s ability to counter domestic extremism, Psaki said, adding that other parts of the government will coordinate to “enhance and accelerate” efforts to address those threats.

The White House did not immediately respond to CNBC’s request for additional information.

The Jan. 6 break-in at the Capitol left five dead, including a U.S. Capitol Police officer, and forced a joint session of Congress to evacuate, halting the confirmation of Biden’s Electoral College victory over Trump.

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[font size="8"]The Capitol Riot: The Suspects
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The Capitol Riot is still huge news and why not? The last time someone tried something that batshit insane was 150 years ago! And due to the sheer amount of people who were at this thing, not only is it going to provide good fodder for us for the next two years, but we may never know the real extent of everything that happened there. But one thing is for certain – the people who infiltrated the Capitol Building are some of the dumbest motherfuckers alive! So much that we’re dedicating this week’s People Are Dumb to just that! But one thing is for certain is that these are some of the stupidest criminals alive. You don’t break into a government building and take a selfie to upload to Instagram! I mean they have things like location and IP trackers. So if you do this, that will make it that much easier for the Feds to find you. Like this for instance!

Texas resident Garret Miller, who posted a picture of himself participating in the January riot at the U.S. Capitol on social media, was arrested by authorities on Friday.

Lawmakers were forced to shelter in place during the riot which interrupted the Congressional confirmation of President Joe Biden's victory in the Electoral College. Five individuals died in connection with the riot which was carried out by supporters of then-President Donald Trump. Many members of the mob broadcast their activities on social media, including Miller.

According to an affidavit from the Federal Bureau of Investigation, Miller posted a 14-second-long video taken inside the Capitol Rotunda that showed rioters waving flags. Miller captioned the video, "From inside congress."

Miller also posted a selfie of himself inside the Rotunda to his Facebook page.
"After MILLER posted the selfie above showing him inside the U.S. Capitol building, an individual on Facebook commented, 'bro you got in?! Nice!,' to which MILLER replied, 'just wanted to incriminate myself a little lol,'" the affidavit read.

Here’s the thing guys – not only are you making the Feds’ job that much easier, you’re also making my job that much easier! Hell I am writing this entry in 10 freaking minutes! The more we find out about what went on during the January 6th riot, the more we find out how fucking stupid and crazy the Trump fans really are. Really – if you play stupid games, you’re going to win stupid prizes. Like a trip to jail or COVID-19. Yeah there’s still that happening too!

The Texas-based real estate agent who traveled to the January 6 Capitol riots in a private plane was kicked off PayPal Thursday evening after attempting to solicit donations for business losses.

Jenna Ryan, who was arrested last week, asked her Twitter followers for help Thursday afternoon, sharing a link to a PayPal account where supporters could offer a donation. In a tweet, Ryan said, "I am accepting donations to pay legal fees and losses due to my arrest and charges by the FBI" and later claimed she had raised $1,000.

By Thursday evening, PayPal had closed the account, according to Kim Eichorn, a PayPal spokesperson.

"PayPal has a policy to allow fundraising for legal defense purposes," Eichorn said in an email to CBS News. "PayPal thoroughly reviews accounts, and if we learn that funds are used for anything other than legal defense, the account will be subject to immediate closure. We can confirm that the account in question has been closed."

Ryan acknowledged that her account was closed Thursday evening in a now-deleted tweet: "Shucky darn I can't do business with PayPal anymore. What am I gonna do with myself? I think I will survive. Seems like some people want to cancel me because I'm trying to get donations from PayPal. Big Woop."

Aw… shucky darn, you’re going to go to jail! Hope you like prison food! I mean really, who the fuck talks like that? Let alone someone who has access to private jets? But you might be thinking “Gee, there’s got to be an explanation for such stupidity! Well guess what? I got news for you: there isn’t. You know how we’re always asking for “pics or it didn’t happen?”. Yeah the same applies here. But when you post selfies with location and IP tracking, you’re gonna get caught.

As she approached the U.S. Capitol doors, Jenna Ryan lined up her face in the frame of a Facebook Live video. “Y’all know who to hire for your Realtor. Jenna Ryan for your Realtor,” she said to the camera.

University of Kentucky student Gracyn Courtright posted a photo of herself on Instagram from outside the Capitol doors, arms lifted in celebration. “Can’t wait to tell my grandkids I was here!” the caption read.

In posts on Instagram and Facebook, Edward “Jake” Lang shared his confrontation with police officers at the Capitol. Using a finger-pointing emoji toward the front of the crowd, Lang wrote, “This is me.”

All three publicly documented their roles in the mob attack Jan. 6 on the U.S. Capitol that left five dead and sent lawmakers fleeing for safety, and all three saw that documentation used against them in charges filed by the Department of Justice.

They are hardly anomalies. Of the 119 people facing federal charges in connection to the riot as of Thursday afternoon, at least 71 cases involve photos, posts or footage from social media. At least 47 people saw screenshots of their own selfies, livestreams, videos or posts in their charges, according to a USA TODAY analysis of the federal charging documents.

Yeah really! There aren’t enough facepalms for this. But again we say – play stupid games and win stupid prizes! Before you think about uploading that selfie of you posing in front of Nancy Pelosi’s office, you might want to think about the consequences of your actions. I mean come on, it got the alt right personality known as Baked Alaska caught. And really who names themselves after a desert from the 1950s? These idiots.

Far-right media personality Tim Gionet, who calls himself “Baked Alaska,” has been arrested by the FBI for his involvement in the riot at the U.S. Capitol, a law enforcement official told The Associated Press.

Gionet was arrested by federal agents in Houston on Saturday, according to the official, who was not authorized to discuss the matter before the public release of a criminal complaint and spoke on condition of anonymity.

Thousands of supporters of President Donald Trump stormed the Capitol on Jan. 6 as Congress was meeting to vote to affirm President-elect Joe Biden’s electoral win. Five people died in the mayhem.

Gionet faces charges of violent and disorderly conduct on Capitol grounds and knowingly entering a restricted building without law

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[font size="8"]Rudy Giuliani
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Speaking of playing stupid games and winning stupid prizes, in this corner we have our next contender… *drum roll* Rudy Giuliani!!! Come on down, what do you win? Well, Mr. New York’s Mayor, you win a prison sentence! And so does everyone in the administration! You get a prison sentence and you get a prison sentence! And you get one! And you get one! Everybody gets a prison sentence! So what did Giuliani do that was so egregious you might ask? Well for one thing in Trump’s final hours – his lawyer Giuliani revealed the true cost of a presidential pardon. It turns out that freedom really isn’t free and in fact it has a price. Well, it has a price tag, anyways! See what I did there?

An associate of Rudy Giuliani told a former CIA officer a presidential pardon was “going to cost $2m”, the New York Times reported on Sunday in the latest bombshell to break across the last, chaotic days of Donald Trump’s presidency.

The report detailed widespread and in some cases lucrative lobbying involving people seeking a pardon as Trump’s time in office winds down. The 45th president, impeached twice, will leave power on Wednesday with the inauguration of Joe Biden.

The former CIA officer John Kiriakou, who was jailed in 2012 for leaking the identity of an operative involved in torture, told the Times he laughed at the remark from the associate of Giuliani, the former New York mayor who as Trump’s personal attorney is reportedly a possible pardon recipient himself.

“Two million bucks – are you out of your mind?” Kiriakou reportedly said. “Even if I had two million bucks, I wouldn’t spend it to recover a $700,000 pension.”

But that said, would you really trust Giuliani for your attorney? Hell I wouldn’t trust him as my attorney in a mock trial. Seriously, I wouldn’t trust him as my attorney on an episode of Mock Trial With J. Reinhold! Just Google that reference. With Trump’s trial going to the Senate, well, we can expect that Giuliani will not be a part of this mess. And don’t worry – we will get to that in a minute. Do you really want a guy this unstable on your side? Well, look at who his boss is!

President Trump’s personal lawyer, Rudolph W. Giuliani, will not be taking part in the president’s defense in the Senate trial for his second impeachment, a person close to Mr. Trump said on Monday.

Mr. Trump met with Mr. Giuliani on Saturday night at the White House, and the next day the president began telling people that Mr. Giuliani was not going to be part of the team. It is unclear who will be the defense lawyer for Mr. Trump, given that many attorneys have privately said they won’t represent him.

Mr. Giuliani himself at first said he was taking part in the trial and then a day later said he had no involvement.

He told ABC News on Sunday that he would not be part of the defense, noting that he is a potential witness since he gave a speech at the rally on Jan. 6 of Trump supporters who went on to storm the Capitol complex, overtaking it for hours.

Yeah that’s because Giuliani might have a huge legal mess on his own. You know those pesky Slapp suits? Well this is one that could work to our advantage because you know conservative conspiracy theorists have been floating bullshit conspiracies about Dominion Voting Systems? Well Giuliani was named in a lawsuit this morning and it’s going to get really ugly really quickly!

Dominion Voting Systems filed a lawsuit against Rudy Giuliani on Monday, accusing the lawyer of defamation after he promoted the baseless conspiracy theories that Dominion was responsible for election fraud.

The election-technology company is seeking more than $1.3 billion in damages.

In the lawsuit, Dominion accused Giuliani, former President Donald Trump's personal lawyer, of creating "a viral disinformation campaign about Dominion," referring to more than 50 of his statements.

"Rudy Giuliani actively propagated disinformation to purposefully mislead voters," Dominion CEO John Poulos said in a statement. "Because Giuliani and others incessantly repeated the false claims about my company on a range of media platforms, some of our own family and friends are among the Americans who were duped."

You know here’s the thing guys, and allow me to play life coach here for a minute. Maybe, I don’t know, don’t live your life in such a way that you get sued by a voting machine company for a fucking BILLION DOLLARS because you peddled lies and baseless bullshit conspiracy theories against them! That’s some sound advice there! And if you think this is going to go away overnight, Dominion actually makes a really solid case.

Dominion Voting Systems filed another defamation lawsuit, this time against Rudy Giuliani, accusing him of spreading lies to “purposefully mislead voters” and causing “irreparable harm” to the company. It didn’t rule out suing former President Donald Trump.

“While pushing the disinformation campaign that incited death threats and violence and caused hundreds of millions of dollars in damage, Giuliani cashed in by hawking gold coins, supplements, cigars, and protection from ‘cyberthieves,’” Dominion legal counsel Thomas Clare said in a statement Monday.

Giuliani was deeply involved in Trump’s efforts to overturn his loss to President Joe Biden in the 2020 election. The former New York City mayor argued repeatedly in public that Trump’s win had been stolen by widespread electoral fraud.

Dominion accuses Giuliani of promulgating the “Big Lie” that Dominion had tampered with votes to fix the election for Biden, in order to “financially enrich himself, to maintain and enhance his public profile, and to ingratiate himself to Donald Trump for money and benefits he expected to receive as a result of that association.”

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[font size="8"]Top 10 Invesitgates: Bitcoin Password Fails
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It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines! This is Top 10 Investigates!

Remember to write down your password. That’s the moral of the story here. because you never know when you might need it, or that hundreds of millions are at stake. The reason why this is brought up is because Bitcoins are back in the news, and people are getting richer than they’ve ever been. But they also can’t figure out how to access their money. But when you can’t access a fortune because you forgot your password, it can come back to haunt you. And if that happens then you can be in seriously deep trouble, both with the Feds and with your actual bank. These entrepreneurs are learning it the really hard way. And in most cases the word “password” isn’t going to work as your password.

With Bitcoin prices increasing by over 50% since it reached its all-time high of $20,000 last month, those locked out of their cryptocurrency wallets are becoming desperate as they calculate how much wealth they would gain if only they remembered their passwords.

Around 20% of the existing 18.5 million Bitcoin — worth a total of $140 billion – are in stranded wallets, according to the cryptocurrency data firm Chainalysis, The New York Times reported on Tuesday.

Wallet Recovery Services, a firm that helps recover lost digital keys, told the Times that it received 70 requests a day from users who are trying to access their digital wallets — a number that is three times higher than it was a month ago.

In an interview with the Times, Stefan Thomas, a programmer living in San Francisco, said that his strategies to remember his password continue to fail, leaving him with only two guesses to figure out his password before being permanently locked out. His 7,002 Bitcoin is worth around $220 million as of this week.

The password should allow him to unlock an IronKey, a small hard drive containing the private keys to a digital wallet that holds his Bitcoin.

Yes, if you’re worth a hundred million dollars, you might want to realize that we could let you get away with having your password as 12345. But this isn’t the only self-made millionaire in the world of electronic currency that’s having a hard time accessing his fortune. Look at this man in Belfast who is offering a staggering amount of money for someone to find his lost hard drive. You know if you had that much money in a hard drive, you might want to, maybe hold onto that device? We’re just saying.

The Missing Bitcoin Millions

James Howells is searching for buried treasure, bitcoin style. The Welshman is negotiating with his local council in an attempt to recover an old hard drive that was disposed of in 2013.

Howell had previously approached the local authorities to help him dig up the lost hard drive, said to contain around 7,500 bitcoin. Howell accidentally threw out the hard drive during a spring clean and only realized his error some months later.

The hard drive is reportedly located somewhere at the city’s landfill site. The elusive hardware currently holds approximately $280 million worth of bitcoin.

The 35-year-old IT engineer is relentlessly pushing to have the hard drive found. And has even received backing from a hedge fund that is willing to fund the operation.
Council Hesitations

While the undertaking might seem like a no-brainer to most, the Newport council believes that the operation could do more harm than good.

That is pretty much what it is like if you don’t find your Bitcoin password. Even more mind blowing is that these guys’ fortune is increasing while they are forgetting their password. So is it intentional or is it just plain stupid? Well it’s a combination of the two. And the guy in Ireland can’t be any worse than this man in the US who is literally just two password guesses from losing his entire fortune. Yeah just think about that for a minute.

Stefan Thomas is a bitcoin millionaire. Or, he would be if only he could remember his password.

The San Francisco software developer and CEO was an early adopter of bitcoin. Back in 2011, he produced an animated video explaining how the digital currency works. For his efforts, a bitcoin enthusiast awarded him 7,002 bitcoins.

Later that year, he lost the password to his IronKey, the USB hard drive that contains the digital wallet that holds his bitcoins. Since then, the currency's value has skyrocketed, and Thomas' holdings are worth $220 million US ($321 million Cdn.)

The IronKey gives users 10 password guesses before it encrypts its contents permanently, and Thomas' bitcoin is lost forever. He has two guesses left.

So how do you fix this? Do you implement harsher or easier for cyber security? That is a question being asked all over the country, especially in light of the recent Solar Winds attack. But here is a possible encryption solution coming from the places that the right likes to refer to as “big tech”. Yes, they created both the problem and what looks like the solution in this case!

Right on the mid-week schedule, Microsoft has released a new Edge Dev build. This week’s build is quite small in scope, but it does bring some well-deserved tweaks and bug fixes. Here’s a look at everything you need to know about Microsoft Edge Dev version 89.0.760.0.

We’ll start first with new features. Microsoft has added Password Monitor support on Mac, and also added Edge Update policies to edge://policy. In addition, also new is support for the Browing Data Lifetime management policy from Chromium. Finally, they also added a management policy to Define Preferred Languages.

Now, for the reliability and changed behaviors. Note that there’s only a few this week. These include a fix for crash on launch, a fix for an issue on Mac where going to check Edge’s version might cause a crash, and a hang issue when using Edge in a virtual desktop. See below for the other changes.

Note that the known issues still haven’t changed from the past releases. The issues are all still the same. As a reminder, some of the known issues include ad-blocking extensions not working on Linux, playback errors on YouTube, issues with Kaspersky Internet Suite, and more. Microsoft did fix the issue from last week where tab drag and drop was broken for vertical tabs.

That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

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[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Gather around my fair brothers and sisters! It’s time to take a seat in the virtual pew and pass the VENMO collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it’s time to remind you that the holiest among us are the most full of:

My fair virtual congregation! I have returned from my sabbatical refreshed and ready to take on a new year which I hope will much better than the last year. And things are already better? You know how I know? I can start referring to the President as a real human being again, and we can freely say his name in my church! Unlike the last guy, who was the most unholy, ungodly excuse for a human being and we dare not say his name in church, even if it is virtual for the time being! But that said, there are those on the right, who cannot help themselves but make some stunningly horrible observations about how the new year and new president will pan out. Let’s start with our good friend Sean Feucht, who I previously profiled in Idiots #9-17, what has he been up to lately? Well this!

Sean Feucht, a religious-right musician and missionary who ran unsuccessfully for Congress last year as a pro-Trump culture warrior in Northern California, gave followers suggestions this week on how “believers” should “respond to a Biden presidency.” In an email, blog post, and related Facebook video he posted on Inauguration Day, Feucht encouraged people to turn off the news and turn on worship music, and to pray for President Joe Biden and other political leaders as the Bible instructs. But Feucht also made it clear that he believes Biden is advancing a satanic agenda. His email to supporters said, “The enemy is launching an all out attack on truth, attacking the Bible, and God’s sacred design for the family, sexuality and gender.”

He reiterated that point in the Facebook video, in which he said, “This administration, I believe, is carrying some of the most anti-Christ agenda and philosophy that maybe we have seen in the history of America.” He warned, “There is a mob spirit that wants us to bow down to the gods of secular liberalism … and if we don’t bow, we’re gonna be bullied, harassed, and threatened. We’re going to be censored. We’re going to banished from speaking in the public square.”

Feucht said it breaks his heart to see Christians celebrating the historic swearing-in of Vice President Kamala Harris, saying, “you’re placing race, you’re placing gender above the values and the biblical and theological foundation that we believe in.”

Gee, I am not shocked at all that someone who sells Christian rock music is trying to tell people to turn off reality. And what is their obsession with “the public square”? Hey guys we’re in a raging pandemic right now, there is no public square! And there’s no one stopping you from saying this crap, just good luck getting anyone to listen. It’s hard, I know! But I do love it when the prophecies fail, as is demonstrated by this next piece!

Right-wing pastor and self-proclaimed “prophet” Hank Kunneman used his sermon Sunday to lash out at those who have dared to call him a false prophet for repeatedly proclaiming that Donald Trump would win the 2020 election and serve a second term in office.

Citing a passage from Proverbs 6 that claims that God hates, among other things, those who sow discord, Kunneman told his critics that God “hates you” as he continued to insist that Trump won the election and will serve a second term.

“God hates six things,” Kunneman said. “Number one: a proud look. Number two: a lying tongue. Number three: abortion, or hands that shed innocent blood. Yeah, you thought it was OK to vote for [Joe Biden]? [Number four:] a heart that devises wicked imaginations, and yet you voted for them. It’s obvious, their wicked imaginations on how they want to destroy this country. [Number five:] feet that are swift in running to mischief. It’s amazing how quickly they signed their executive orders; that’s called feet that run quickly to mischief.”

“But notice something,” he continued. “God hates what? He didn’t say he hates discord. He hates you that are being a troll. He hates you that are attacking your Christian brothers and sisters. ‘Yeah, but they’re false. They’re wrong.’ Excuse me. How do you know? ‘Because it hasn’t come to pass.’ How do you know that it hasn’t come to pass? First of all, the president was reelected. Let’s get that clear. Second of all, he was given a second term based on reelection. ‘Well, he’s not serving it now?’ Because it was stolen by thieve

Yes, Hank. You know what God also doesn’t love? He doesn’t love people who attempt to murder those who they don’t agree with. As is the case here with the unholy, ungodly Dark One, and even though he is no longer in power, we must never speak his name in my church, must less I cast thee out! Because the good LAWRD JAYSUS knows this! But is this really comparable to the 1930s? Only when a bunch of right wingers knowingly get their asses handed to them!

Eric Metaxas, a right-wing author who has tumbled ever-deeper into Trumpism and stolen election conspiracy theories, complained on his radio show Tuesday that he and his sponsor, MyPillow guy Mike Lindell, are the victims of a “wicked” cancel culture that Metaxas claimed “really is like what happened in Germany in the ‘30s.”

Lindell became a major funder of right-wing media during the Trump administration and has heavily promoted conspiracy theories about Donald Trump’s loss to Joe Biden in the 2020 presidential election. He sponsors “The Eric Metaxas Radio Show” as well as the Right Side Broadcasting Network, which livestreamed Trump rallies and so-called Stop the Steal events. On a show posted Monday, Metaxas called Lindell “an American hero.”

Metaxas griped that he is losing sponsors and that YouTube took down a video of the Monday show on which the two of them talked about widely debunked conspiracy theories that the election had been stolen from Donald Trump. On that video, Lindell claimed that Trump won by millions of votes and that “China and other countries chose our president and many down-ticket people, too, including the two runoff Senate races in Georgia.”

Metaxas also noted that two large retail outlets, Kohl’s and Bed, Bath and Beyond, recently announced they would no longer carry Lindell’s products, a development that Metaxas called “despicable” and “absolutely chilling.” He urged his listeners never to shop at those stores again.

Nah, it’s only a douchebag getting treated like the douchebag that he is. Because even in the new year we must make sure that they are getting what is coming to them. That’s a passage in the Good Book, which you can still buy! But really you’re defending a pillow salesman? A guy who hawks cheaply made garbage at that? Fine if that is the hill that you shall layeth on. And by the way if you want to know where the new year is headed, just consult your local Alt Right!

With Joe Biden inaugurated as the 46th president of the United States on the same steps that right-wing extremists had charged up to storm the U.S. Capitol less than two weeks ago, reality hit some right-wing activists and extremists: Trump was out of office, and their campaign to keep him there was fruitless. But while some recognized defeat, others were keen to press new conspiracy theories, cling to old ones, and double down on their attacks.

Far-right activist Jack Posobiec was not feeling Biden’s message of unity. Posobiec continued pushing the conspiracy theory that conservatives were being hunted and that Biden would impose martial law. In numerous tweets, he compared Biden to President Snow, the despotic character in “The Hunger Games” book and movie series. “I can’t wait for the Unity Trials to start!” he tweeted. In another, he wrote, “Mao promoted unity too.”

Posobiec wasn’t the only one attacking calls for unity. The right-wing Catholic Vote sent out a message shortly after Biden’s inaugural address: “In his inaugural address, President Biden spoke of the need for unity. He’s right, America is divided like never before. The cheap excuse offered by the media and the Left is to blame President Trump and his supporters. Yet anyone paying attention knows Joe Biden and the progressive Left have divided America based on race, gender, income, religion, and more for decades.”

Others directed their anger at their former hero. In response to a question about whether Trump unsealed any indictments, issued last minute pardons, or declassified anything Wednesday morning, Cassandra Fairbanks, a far-right activist who has defended white supremacists and made racist comments, replied, “Let me answer all of that for you in trumps favorite medium,” and tweeted a video featuring the lyrics, “He went out like a bitch!” Banks, who has deep ties to Wikileaks and its founder Julian Assange, was infuriated Trump chose not to pardon Assange.

Now that is where the right wants to take us in 2021! Yes, things are going to get interesting and possibly ugly, and we will keep you up on the latest developments! Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]People Who Somehow Got Elected: Lauren Boebert
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Politicians at the state and local levels who are so toxic, you wonder how they’re able to get away with the things they get away with. This is:

This week: Colorado’s Lauren Boebert. Rep Boebert is a representative of Colorado’s 3rd district which includes the city of Pueblo. Pueblo is a town that is known for it’s ski resorts in the winter. It’s also now known for electing criminally batshit crazy representatives such as Lauren Boebert, who represents a Q Anon Congressional installation as well as the 3rd district of Colorado. Boebert is a freshmen representative for 2021, but has come under fire for her involvement in the January 6th insurrection against the United States Capitol, for which she almost got herself killed along with just about everyone in Congress. So why is Rep Boebert under so much scrutiny right now? Well first let’s give you a bit of background:

Born December 15, 1986, Lauren Boebert is an American politician and gun rights activist serving as the US Representative for Colorado's 3rd congressional district.

Boebert defeated incumbent congressman Scott Tipton in the 2020 primary election, becoming the first woman to represent Colorado's 3rd Congressional district in Congress.

The gun activist owns Shooters Grill, a restaurant in Rifle, Colorado, where staffers are encouraged to openly carry firearms.

During Beto O'Rourke's 2020 presidential campaign at Aurora, Colorado, Boebert challenged the presidential hopeful over his proposal for a gun buyback program, saying, "Hell, no, you won't take our guns."

In November 2020, Boebert said she planned to carry a gun while working as a congresswoman on Capitol Hill in Washington DC.

Yes, Boebert is a gun enthusiast who was the previous owner of a gun-themed bar called Shooters, and yes this is a real thing that exists. Then January 6th happened when a group of armed insurrectionists stormed the Capitol Building in Washington, DC. How did Rep Boebert respond? By bringing a gun to the Capitol and setting off the metal detectors, prompting a $5,000 fine and some much needed explanation.

Dozens of officials in Colorado's 3rd Congressional District have signed a letter requesting U.S. House officers launch an investigation into the conduct of Colorado Rep. Lauren Boebert.

Boebert, a freshman legislator, has turned heads for her pro-gun rhetoric, including a video and several statements that claim she will carry a handgun with her throughout the Capitol complex, as well as her dogged support of the Make America Great Again movement and President Donald Trump's political stances.

On Jan. 9, Pueblo residents held a rally asking Boebert to listen to her constituents and tone down divisive statements, as well as requesting that House officials either not allow her to take her seat or not give her any committee assignments. Many individuals and groups have questioned Boebert's social media conduct, especially on Jan. 6. They have discussed ways to recall her from office.

Critics pointed to Tweets from Boebert on Jan. 6 regarding House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's whereabouts during the Capitol attack as evidence she was working with members of the attack. Five individuals died as a result of the events of Jan. 6, and many were injured.

Read more: https://www.chieftain.com/story/news/2021/01/15/rep-lauren-boebert-should-investigated-colorado-officials-say/4175409001/

Indeed! What makes this even more troubling is that Rep. Boebert has been known to hang out with paramilitary white supremacists, including the Proud Boys and Oath Keepers, of which she recently accepted a personalized firearm from, prompting ethics complaints. Yes, Lauren’s Got A Gun all right, but here’s hoping the Q Anon gun nuts don’t fire when ready!

Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-CO) found herself in an ethics flap on Monday as controversy continues to dominate her first month in office.

The progressive political action committee Rural Colorado United posted video of Boebert being gifted a gun.

"Lauren Boebert breaks state and federal laws accepting gifted gun from white supremacist Stephen Moore on video. Illegal to accept gifts over $50 and illegal to gift guns in CO," Rural Colorado United posted to Twitter.

Less than two hours later, Boebert addressed the matter on Twitter, saying she planned to purchase the .40 S&W Glock from Colorado Boots on the Ground Bikers for Trump. She did not address the allegations of white supremacy, but praised the militia group as "patriots."

Kyle Clark of 9 News Denver was shocked about her "lack of awareness" and noticed what appears to be a "Three Percenters" militia patch:

That’s probably how you order a drink at Shooters! But all of that said, in case you wonder how it started and how’s it going, per the favorite Twitter meme, well, it’s going about as well as you would expect, and don’t expect her to provide any meaningful legislation. Instead all Boebert is doing there is to serve as an FU to the people who go against the Trump cult.

Republican Representative Lauren Boebert has introduced her first three bills in Congress. All three take aim at President Biden's recent executive orders.

The first bill would prevent the U.S. from spending any money to rejoin the Paris Climate agreement unless the Senate ratifies the agreement.

“Responsible energy production supports more than 230,000 Colorado jobs,” she said in a statement. “The Paris Agreement puts these jobs at risk and will increase energy costs.”

The second bill would prevent funds going to the World Health Organization until America holds the international health organization and China “accountable for their role in the global pandemic.”

This was a constant refrain from former President Donald Trump, who downplayed the pandemic in its early days and whose administration was criticized for its response to the coronavirus and attempted to pull out from the WHO.

Boebert’s third bill would overturn Biden’s mask mandate on federal lands and interstate travel on planes, trains or buses. She called it “continued federal overreach.” Boebert defied public health orders by keeping her restaurant open during the early days of the pandemic.


So skirting around metal detector laws, hanging out with white supremacists, and saying “fuck you” to Biden’s agenda. That’s Colorado District 3 representative Lauren Boebert, yet another inexplicable addition to the ever-growing list of:

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[font size="8"]This Fucking Guy: Jon Schaffer
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We’re delving into the world of heavy metal this week for This Fucking Guy. I am sure a lot of you know that I am a metal head. I fucking love the metal genre. But that said, every genre has their fair share of douchebags. Now this is a band that I used to *LOVE* back in the day when I first started getting into the metal genre, but had no idea about this guy’s personal life. That guy is Iced Earth guitarist Jon Schaffer. You probably heard this guy’s name pop up because he was one of the people involved in storming the Capitol and the Capitol riot. And he’s probably the most famous person there who’s not an elected official.

A heavy metal guitarist from Indiana who was photographed inside the U.S. Capitol during the Jan. 6 insurrection turned himself in to the FBI Sunday afternoon, according to Indianapolis FBI spokeswoman Chris Bavender.

Jon Ryan Schaffer, a native of Central Indiana and founder of the band Iced Earth, is accused of using "bear spray," a pepper-based irritant sold by many outdoor retailers, on police officers as rioters forced their way into the Capitol building. A federal statement of facts in his case says Schaffer was seen in photographs and video "engaging in verbal altercations with Capitol Police insider the Capitol building" and holding a container of bear spray.

He had been featured on an FBI poster seeking the public's help in identifying protesters. Multiple people contacted by IndyStar identified Schaffer as the man seen in a photograph at the Capitol.

Bavender said Schaffer faces six charges, including engaging in an act of physical violence in a Capitol building, Bavender told IndyStar. He also faces charges of knowingly entering or remaining in any restricted building or grounds without lawful authority, disrupting the orderly conduct of government business, violent entry and disorderly conduct in a Capitol building, engaging in an act of physical violence in a Capitol building, and demonstrating or picketing in a Capitol building.

And by the way in case you’re wondering where the rest of Iced Earth stands on the political spectrum, well, they’re pretty much the opposite of Schaffer. In fact so much that they actually issued a statement saying that they condemned the fact that he was at the capitol. So this will be quite the interesting circular firing squad for when / if he’s ever released from prison. Which will probably not be very likely given what’s transpired.

The bandmates of Iced Earth guitarist Jon Schaffer have released a statement following the news the musician is wanted by US authorities for his involvement at the Capitol riots on January 6.

Schaffer is wanted by Metropolitan Police in D.C. after he was pictured among the crowd of Trump supporters who breached the central US government building on January 6, while Congress were in the process of certifying Joe Biden’s election victory.

Releasing a statement via bassist Luke Appleton’s Instagram page today (January 10), the other members of the Florida heavy metal outfit – Appleton, Stu Block, Jake Dreyer and Brent Smedley – began by saying they understood the concerns their silence had caused some people, explaining they needed time to properly process events before making a statement.

“We absolutely DO NOT condone nor do we support riots,” the band said, “or the acts of violence that the rioters were involved in on January 6th at the US Capitol building.

“We hope that all those involved that day are brought to justice to be investigated and answer for their actions.”

By the way in case you’re wondering if actions have consequences, let’s take a look at what happened when Schaffer entered the Capitol. Well their record label, Century Media, which is the host to just about every amazing metal band you can think of, gave him the heave ho that he so properly deserved for that little stunt! Yup, actions have consequences all right!

It looks like Iced Earth‘s record label Century Media may be taking action following Jon Schaffer‘s arrest for his involvement in the U.S. Capitol riots.

This week, onlookers noticed that both Iced Earth and Demons & Wizards are now missing from Century Media’s website roster. This has led to speculation that both of Schaffer’s projects have potentially been dropped by the label.
Read more: Fall Out Boy’s first reported Funko Pop! figures just surfaced—look

On Jan. 6, Pro-Trump supporters breached the U.S. Capitol building in efforts to stop the confirmation of Electoral College votes. The riots caused a great amount of destruction and led to five deaths. Shortly following the events that transpired, metal fans quickly identified Jon Schaffer in the mob of Trump supporters.

Then, last week, Schaffer’s Iced Earth bandmates spoke out on the situation. They released a joint statement denouncing the riots. However, they failed to address Schaffer’s involvement in the insurrection. As well, singer Stu Block attempted to clarify his stance on the riots after a now-deleted post seemingly showed he was in support of the U.S. Capitol breach.

Warm up act abuse! And at the rate things are going, Iced Earth will probably be downgraded to warm up acts at some point, when concerts will ever resume. But speaking of that if you want one of those how it started / how’s it going memes, this would be a perfect example of what not to do. Because John Schaffer isn’t exactly having what one would call a “stellar year” so far since his one and only tour appearance in Washington DC. We’ll keep an update on this story as it develops.
Iced Earth guitarist Jon Schaffer is reportedly set to be extradited to Washington D.C. after his alleged participation in the US Capitol riots earlier this month.

Schaffer will be extradited to the capital from Edinburgh, Indiana, where he is currently being held in Marion County Jail.

He faces a series of charges in connection with the incident and must prove to a federal magistrate that he is not a threat to himself or the public before being released on bail.

Other rioters who face similar charges have been already granted bail, but ordered to surrender their firearms, avoid contact with other alleged rioters and stay away from all state capitol buildings.

In images captured during the January 6 riot, Schaffer was seen wearing a baseball cap with the slogan ‘Oath Keepers Lifetime Member’.

That’s Iced Earth guitarist John Schaffer. This week’s:

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[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
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Hit it!

Of course you know by now that people are people, and people are dumb. And we haven’t done this segment in a while, so of course there’s going to be some ridiculously stupid people floating about out there. I want to start with this story out of Maine, where a guy with a chainsaw channeled his inner Freddie Kruger. Yeah that’s someone who you do not want to imitate in public. Nor any horror movie serial killer with a chainsaw. Look, I love Evil Dead as much as the next horror fan, but this is a whole new level of stupid and dangerous. Let the professionals like Bruce Campbell handle the chainsaw wielding fun!

A man wielding a chain saw was arrested Tuesday afternoon after chasing people at the McDonald’s restaurant in Westbrook, damaging two vehicles and stealing a drink and some food, police said.

Alice Sweet, 26, of Portland was captured by Westbrook police near the Fireside Inn on Riverside Street after fleeing from the Main Street restaurant, according to Westbrook police Capt. Steve Goldberg. Sweet was charged with robbery, criminal mischief, refusing to submit to arrest and violating his conditions of release.

The bizarre incident began around 3:30 p.m. when police started receiving multiple 911 calls about a man “chasing people with a chain saw at McDonald’s,” Goldberg said in a news release.

Sweet entered the restaurant and while revving the saw intermittently, he went behind the counter where employees were preparing meals and stole a drink and food, Goldberg said.

“When the manager confronted the suspect in the parking lot, the suspect began chasing the manager with the chain saw,” Goldberg said. “The suspect also used the chain saw to damage two vehicles that were at the restaurant.”

Every on-duty police officer in Westbrook responded to the 911 calls. Sweet was located near VIP Tires on Riverside Street but fled when officers approached. He was apprehended without incident near the Fireside Inn, Goldberg said. No injuries were reported.


Yeah Evil Dead is fiction. Next up – the Capitol Riots have produced some stunningly stupid criminals and we were going to dedicate this whole feature to them, but we might save that for another feature. But this is one of my favorites – and it involves famously hardcore right wing actor Chuck Norris. No, Chuck Norris was not at the riots. But take a selfie while you’re there with the location tracking feature turned on, and you’ll eventually get found out.

After a viral photo claimed to show Chuck Norris at last week's rally of supporters of President Donald Trump in Washington, D.C., his camp issued a statement on Tuesday saying it wasn't actually the martial arts actor.

Erik Kritzer, a spokesman for the "Walker, Texas Ranger" actor, insisted that his client was thousands of miles away from the U.S. Capitol last week.

"This is not Chuck Norris and is a wannabe look-alike, although Chuck is much more handsome," Kritzer said in a statement to NBC News. "Chuck remains on his range in Texas where he has been with his family."

A photo posted to Twitter on Monday appeared to show a Trump supporter snapping a selfie with Norris during Wednesday's rally to oppose the results of the presidential election.

After the rally, a violent pro-Trump mob stormed the U.S. Capitol Building and tried to stop lawmakers from formally accepting President-elect Joe Biden's victory. At least five people died as a result of the riot.

I’m sure the actual Chuck Norris would approve. Anyway next up – we go overseas to our new overlords in Russia! There are stupid people everywhere, and this tale of stupid criminals takes place in the Russian Navy, where a captain decided to take a few “souvenirs” from his submarine as it was in the process of being decommissioned. File this one under “play stupid games, win stupid prizes”.

The Russian Navy says that a former commander of the now-decommissioned Sovremenny class destroyer Bespokoynyy conspired with others and stole the ship's two bronze propellers while it was in dry dock being converted into a floating museum. The alleged caper sounds like it was ripped straight from the plot of a comedic Hollywood heist movie, with the thieves reportedly swapping out the pair of screws, each weighing approximately 13 tons, for ones made out of a cheaper metal.

Russian media outlet Interfax reported on Jan. 11, 2021, that Sergei Sharshavykh, head of the military investigation department of the Russian Navy's Baltic Fleet, confirmed that the investigation into the theft was nearly complete. The names of the former commander of the Bespokoynyy, or any of their accomplices, and what kind of jail time or fines they might be facing, were not disclosed. The two propellers are valued at approximately 39 million rubles, or just over $522,513 at the rate of exchange at the time of writing.

Sharshavykh, the Russian Navy investigator told Interfax that, to "cover their tracks," those involved in the theft had imitation screws made up, the "cost and quality of which are several times lower" than the original bronze ones.
It's unclear when the theft took place, but Sharshavykh said that happened after Bespokoynyy arrived at Yantar in 2016 for conversion into a museum ship as part of its decommissioning from the Russian Navy. That process included remove the destroyer's two propellers, as well as its driveshafts, and sealing the hull in such a way as to allow it to remain afloat, but without the need for regular maintenance.


Next up – back to the Capitol Riots, look here’s the thing guys. If you took part in the Trump uprising, maybe, I don’t know, don’t take selfies? Seriously guys these things have things like location trackers and IP tracers, if you took a selfie at the Capitol, the Feds are going to find you! Where’s J. Walter Weatherman when you need him? And that’s why you always leave a note!

A New York man has now been charged with participating in the Jan. 6 insurrection in D.C. after allegedly texting a picture and video of himself in the Capitol to his girlfriend’s brother – a special agent with the U.S. Diplomatic Security Service.

According to a probable cause affidavit filed in the U.S. District Court for the District of Columbia, the agent – who is a federal officer employed by the U.S. Department of State – reported the photo and video to the Diplomatic Security Service, which then passed it along to the Joint Terrorism Task Force.

The agent reportedly saw a post from his sister on Facebook that her boyfriend, Thomas Fee, of Freeport, New York, was in D.C. “at the rally” on Jan. 6. The agent subsequently texted Fee, who allegedly confirmed his presence and sent him a “selfie” of him in the Capitol Rotunda, along with a video and a text saying he was “at the tip of the spear.”

According to the affidavit, federal investigators were able to confirm a white Chevy Tahoe registered to Fee left Long Island, where Freeport is located, on Jan. 5 and returned Jan. 7 at around 11 a.m.


Finally this week – don’t worry, Florida! You’re not spared from this week! Of course everyone knows Florida – as Homer Simpson once called it “America’s Wang”. And really when you’re drunk – and I know I have been many times in my life, why does there need to be a last call? Why not take the whole bar with you? That’s what this one guy did in the Florida Keys!

A drunk Florida man was arrested after he was caught operating a floating tiki bar that was reportedly stolen, the US Coast Guard announced.

Agents from the Coast Guard’s Key West station found the man on the stolen tiki hut near Hawk’s Channel off the coast of the Florida Keys, the agency wrote in a Wednesday tweet.

“Don’t drink and boat!” the tweet quipped.

The man appeared intoxicated and was taken into custody by officers from Florida’s Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission, the Coast Guard said. ......(more)


That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Road To The White House
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Welcome back to our ongoing coverage of the 2020 election to end all elections in… *cue reverb* THE ROAD TO THE WHITE HOUSE!!!! Ooh that was some good reverb there. We’ll be doing this segment until March 10th. But we did it everybody!!! We finally served Trump the eviction notice he so badly deserves and Joesph R. Biden has won the election to become our 46th president! Or has he? Well there’s some on the right who are denying Biden as much as they are a certain deadly disease that’s out there. But that’s not here or there. Here, we’re out to celebrate the inauguration and remind the kids that Democrats get all the cool celebrities, and if you vote conservative, you get trashy celebrities like Ted Nugent and Kid Rock. So here’s how the party went down.

The inauguration of President Joe Biden won more viewers than President Donald Trump’s 2017 ceremony, per early Nielsen figures, and saw a reversal of fortunes for some of the nation’s best-watched cable-news outlets.

Approximately 39.87 million people watched the half-hour swearing-in ceremony over the nation’s six major TV-news outlets, according to Nielsen, compared with 38.35 million viewers for the 2017 event. The 2021 figure represents an approximately 4% increase over its 2017 predecessor.

Nielsen estimated that an average of 33.7 million people watched the event across 17 different networks, compared with an average of 30.6 million who watched former President Donald Trump’s inauguration in 2017. Those figures, which include viewing via broadband and by people not in their own homes, indicate that 10.2% more people watched some part of the Biden proceedings than Trump’s.

CNN’s coverage captured an average of 9.9 million for the pivotal half hour, leading the pack. The AT&T-backed cable-news network said the numbers represented the biggest audience it has captured for an inauguration broadcast in its history.

Thank you Nelson! Oh man I bet that had to burn Trump. Because you know he loves him some ratings, and nobody gets bigger ratings than he does! Except of course… for Joe Biden! And you know what else is nice? Having a president who has a deep consideration for the arts because Trump doesn’t. And the arts will play a huge role in our economic recovery after this damn pandemic. But having a rainbow is nice after the dark storm that was the Trump administration!

'The “inauguration painting” displayed at a reception inside the U.S. Capitol on Wednesday delivered on a message of hope for peace just as the new administration was sworn in.

Incoming first lady Jill Biden and Sen. Roy Blunt (R-Mo.) selected the painting as the official artwork for the swearing-in ceremony. Painted in 1859 by renowned Black artist Robert S. Duncanson (1821-1872), "Landscape With Rainbow" features an idyllic American countryside under a rainbow.

As Christopher Knight writes for the LA Times, the work possibly echoes the famous Black spiritual, “Mary Don’t You Weep,” dating from the pre-Civil War era. Even before a storm--the Civil War was on the horizon--a rainbow, sign of hope, appears. From the song's chorus: “God gave Noah the rainbow sign; no more water, the fire next time.”

On loan from the Smithsonian, the painting's gallery label reads:

Robert Seldon Duncanson was America’s best known African American painter in the years surrounding the Civil War. Based in Cincinnati, he was supported by abolitionists who bought his paintings and sponsored his trip to Europe to study from the Old Masters. In this pastoral landscape, a young couple strolls through fertile pastureland, toward a house at the end of a rainbow. The cattle head home toward the nearby cottage, reinforcing the sense that man lives in harmony with nature. Duncanson’s vision of rural America as Arcadia, a landscape akin to paradise, is a characteristic feature of his work, a late hope for peace before the onset of Civil War.'


So that said, even though it was minimalist compared to previous inaugurations, and we’re not counting the minimalist audience that was at Trump’s inauguration. Hey o!!! But still, Biden’s inauguration was definitely something and something history will remember because we’re still in a raging pandemic and everything is awkward and socially distant. But Biden delivered a great address.

'In his inaugural address today, President Joe Biden emphasized unifying this country and ending what he called an uncivil war: “We must end this uncivil war that pits red against blue, rural versus urban, rural versus urban, conservative versus liberal. We can do this if we open our souls instead of hardening our hearts. If we show a little tolerance and humility, and if we’re willing to stand in the other person’s shoes.”

Stanford history professor David M. Kennedy tells KCRW what national leadership must do now: “The federal government needs to demonstrate that it can be a competent government that can deliver the goods, not least of all, improving the speed and reach of the COVID vaccine rollout. ... That kind of thing would go a long way to restoring the public's confidence in government.”

Washington Post columnist Michele Norris points out that Biden has empathy, which she calls his “natural octave.”

“He is quite good at that. … There was a lot of tough language in the inaugural address today. But there's a gentleness about Joe Biden. … That is the kind of thing that Joe Biden might be able to extend, some sort of olive branch so people are at least willing to perhaps listen to what he has to say and what he has to offer in terms of governance,” Norris says.

You’re not going to capture their attention that way! But see if you hang with us you get to see concerts by the Foo Fighters, Lady Gaga, and Black Pumas! If you hang with conservatives you get to see Diamond and Silk, and performances by Vanilla Ice and 3 Doors Down. Maybe Ted Nugent will show up but he’ll just be standing on the side. And you know what? Enough talking about Orange Douche, we did it everybody!!!!

You have heard the song “Feeling Good.” You have heard it a lot. You have heard Michael Buble’s version over mimosas, or Nina Simone’s on your friend’s turntable, or any of the thousands bellowed by first-round The Voice auditioners. It is familiar now, to the point where it almost doesn’t register when it’s playing, even in an interpretation as heartfelt as the one John Legend delivered last night as part of Celebrating America, the prime-time, mid-Covid, virtual, audienceless, small and soaring post-inaugural concert that kicked off the Biden/Harris administration on Wednesday night and made me tear up at a goddamn Katy Perry song.

But it should register. It has meaning, and I hope that meaning came through amid the fireworks and the flossing and the champagne. “Feeling Good” and feeling good are important, and I’m here for them both. We’ve earned them.

Here’s the deal with the song: In 1965, Anthony Newley and Leslie Bricusse debuted their musical The Roar of the Greasepaint, The Smell of the Crowd, which in the tradition of 1960s entertainment is smugly symbolic and absolutely ridiculous. It is the story of Sir, a big fat rich fucking asshole, and Cocky, a disheveled but proud young striver. The plot revolves around their longstanding rivalry in The Game, a hopscotch-type exercise performed on a chalk circle in the middle of the stage, which Sir always wins because he changes the rules over and over to his advantage. It is, as you fully understood three sentences ago, an allegory for society. It is also awful, and it will almost definitely be revived on Broadway to great critical acclaim in our lifetime.

See you next week!


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Posted by Top 10 Idiots | Wed Jan 27, 2021, 06:00 PM (3 replies)

Top 10 Conservative Idiots Best Of #14: Imagine If You Will... Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots Best Of #14: Imagine If You Will… Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! The only progressive news show brought to you by an actual idiot. I’m just kidding, of course. We are still coming to you from this blank, blue void in the back of a Burbank Comedy Club. I mean would you look at that background? It’s so blue! Of course this is the space where we were supposed to say goodbye to the Trump administration the way we’ve been dreaming of the last four years. But given the horrible atrocities and violent attempted coup that happened at the Capitol Building in DC last week, our writers simply said “fuck it” before attempting to walk off the job and smoke some badly needed weed. Shout out to People’s in Santa Ana, they’ve been keeping us from fucking losing our minds in the last 11 months! Imagine if you will, the news gets so fucking dark that we actually need as much weed as we can get during these trying times! But there is some great news - Trump got his ass impeached again! Now I kind of wish we were going through with it, oh well. Lost opportunity is lost. Anyway we badly needed some because we decided to completely scrap our planned “Goodbye To Trump” special and we may revisit it at a later date. Also, we planned to start Season 10 on 1/20, and since we still don’t know what will happen on that day, we are moving the start of our new season to 1/27. Hopefully things will have calmed down by then. And I use the word “hopefully” in the same sense that a racoon will hopefully stop digging through your garbage. This was a rock bottom point for America. I mean it can only get better, right? Well, anyway enough of the intro. We have a lot of Idiocy to get to this week. But first Stephen Colbert eviscerates Trump and the Capitol Rioters:

So where do we begin for this week’s Best Of? In the first slot this week is Idiots #8-15 where we turn back to last April, and anti-vaxxers, you think the cure is worse than the disease? Well just wait until you find out what Dr. Trump (1) has prescribed for you!. In the second slot this week, from Idiots #9-5, Trump (2) has a bizarre endorsement of the Mexican food brand Goya from the Resolute Desk and let’s just say beans are the musical fruit! Taking the #3 slot, from Idiots #8-9, Trump went to India as a guest of prime minister Narajandra Modi (3) and well that whole thing was quite the colossal shit show. In the #4 slot, from Idiots #8-13 after the pandemic has been raging, we take a look at which conservative senators (4) are profiting from it and you will rage yourself! In the fifth slot this week, from Idiots #8-14, our weekly investigative piece, Top 10 Investigates, takes a look at the conspiracy theories surrounding the so-called “miracle cure”, hydroxychloroquine, and the fact that it’s been banned repeatedly by the FDA, AMA, and well, all sane people. In the #6 slot, from Idiots #9-9, our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in “Holy Shit” takes a look at the scandal surrounding longtime Liberty University president Jerry Falwell Jr and well, talk about one being way too stupid to breathe. Taking the 7th slot this week, from Idiots #9-8, our editorial on pop culture, “Beating A Dead Horse” takes a look at why our favorite star of the Deadpool franchise, Ryan Reynolds (7) got married at one of the biggest plantations in America and how he’s now come to regret it. In the #8 slot this week, from Idiots #9-6, our segment that attempts to explain the unexplainable, Conspiracy Corner (8) takes a look at why Q Anon fans wasted their weekends harassing furniture manufacturer Wayfair over “alleged” child sex trafficking, prompting Wayfair to give one of the craziest PR releases ever! Taking the #9 (NEIN!!!!) slot this week, from Idiots #9-11 is a People Are Dumb, because of course they are! Finally this week from Idiots #9-14, we’re not at all surprised that Trump (10) walked off the second presidential debate, because we all know that everything about that guy just screams and oozes class (sarcasm). Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font]

From: Idiots #8-15

Mark it down: 4/23/20. That is the day that the President Of The United States, in his trying and infinite wisdom, simply stopped giving a flying fuck. See, we at the Top 10 have been tracking Trump’s exploits since he first wormed his way down that golden escalator way back in 2015, which by today’s standards, literally seems like an eternity ago. Remember civilization? I miss those times. But last week, he crossed the line and just stopped caring about us. Remember that in November, kids. Want a president who will be at your side? Vote Biden. Want a president who will bring about the apocalypse and then not give a shit about you? Then vote Trump. Because here’s what you get with a Donald J. Trump presidency as opposed to a president who actually listens to experts.

Presented with incontrovertible evidence that Donald Trump is stupid and clueless and that the American people should not follow his advice, reporters and editors in America's top newsrooms averted their eyes.

Home delivery subscribers to the Washington Post, for instance, wouldn't have a clue that Trump on Thursday evening proposed injecting patients with disinfectants to see if they would kill the coronavirus in lungs, as they do on the kitchen counter. There was no mention of it in the print edition.

Yes, Trump actually asked, after hearing a presentation on how bleach and rubbing alcohol can kill the virus on surfaces: "Is there a way we can do something like that, by injection inside or almost a cleaning? Because, you see, it gets in the lungs and it does a tremendous number on the lungs. So it would be interesting to check that."

Is there a stupider, more dangerous thing he could possibly say? Could he possibly give a clearer indication that he is manifestly unfit to lead the nation during a public health crisis? Small children know better than this.

Yes, poison control is higher than number one! But really we have a president who’s a fucking sitcom character. He is the kind of character who’s the annoying neighbor who is constantly looking for his next get rich quick scheme, and then when said scheme backfires on him, he desperately wants to get a “get out of jail free” card. And that’s what this is. But like all things that happen, actions have consequences.

Illinois Poison Control has seen an uptick in calls since President Donald Trump questioned if injecting disinfectant could cure coronavirus.

Dr. Nogzi Ezike, head of the Illinois Department of Public Health, warned people not to try to use cleaning products on or in their bodies to fight coronavirus. She also said Illinois Poison Control has gotten more callers after Trump’s Thursday comments.

“Injecting, ingesting, snorting household cleaners is dangerous. It is not advised and can be deadly,” Ezike said during a Saturday press conference. “In the past two days, there’s been a significant increase in calls to the Illinois Poison Center compared to the same time last year.”

The governor’s office did not immediately provide numbers showing how large an uptick there has been.

Yeah exactly Trump is Newman in this case! His scheme to peddle hydroxychloroquine is backfiring on him, now he’s suggesting that people simply drink bleach. And never mind that bleach packages have giant warning labels on them, and Rob Gronkowski did a commercial to remind people not to eat Tide Pods (see: Top 10 #4-2). But no, we have a president who is telling people to drink bleach.

A talk radio caller suggested vaping bleach as a possible treatment for coronavirus, and conservative host Jeff Kuhner assured him the recommendation wasn’t crazy.

The caller, who identified himself as Zack from Stoughton, called into Boston’s WRKO-AM on Friday morning to talk about President Donald Trump’s dangerous suggestion to use disinfectants or powerful light internally to treat COVID-19.

“I’ve been thinking about this thing,” Zack began. “I was a smoker for years, I smoked about three packs a day, and I never liked this new vape thing coming out with the nicotine in it, but I also have a bunch of friends with big cleaning companies.”

After hearing an ad on Kuhner’s program offering a disinfecting service during the pandemic, Zack said he started connecting the dots and wondered whether vape pens could deliver bleach and other disinfecting chemicals into infected lungs.


Seriously, we went from curing polio and exploring the moon to telling people that they shouldn't drink bleach. And after realizing tha Trump is our president and he's spouting this nonsense, it occurred to me, this is why we don't get nice things. That is a huge drop off in the ever ongoing sad state of humanity in 2020. At least this has been good for some cheap laughs, and god knows we need more of that in society to get us through this thing. Even Snoop Dogg is having some laughs at Trump’s expense, and at this point, I’d much rather have Snoop in charge!

Rapper Snoop Dogg shared a depiction of President Donald Trump drinking bleach on Instagram, following the president's suggestion that maybe disinfectant may be used to treat the virus, via injection.

During a press briefing on Thursday, Trump suggested that ultraviolet light or disinfectant maybe used to treat COVID-19. "And then I see the disinfectant where it knocks it out in a minute. One minute. And is there a way we can do something like that, by injection inside or almost a cleaning?" he said, according to BBC. "So it'd be interesting to check that."

Snoop was one of many people to show his skepticism for the disinfectant treatment. The image Snoop shared showed Trump pouring a giant bottle of Clorox right into his mouth. He said that he thought if Trump or his supporters tried it first, maybe then he'd give it a shot. "Aight u go first then ya voters and I'll be here waiting to c [sic] how y'all feel before I go under my kitchen sink for some bleach," he wrote in the caption.

Granted, Trump did qualify his statement by saying that he wasn't a doctor. "I'm not a doctor. But I'm, like, a person that has a good you-know-what," he said.

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font]

From: [link:democraticunderground.com/100213792117 | Idiots #9-5]

Donald Trump is the Krusty The Klown of presidents. You can find him all over the TV, he once hosted a show that got progressively worse as it went on, and he’s hawked a ton of incredibly poor quality merchandise over the years, to varying degrees of success. Not to mention he lives in a giant house with his name on it, and flies around in a jet with his name on it. But the difference – Krusty isn’t the one who is the leader of the free world! And of course, Trump’s true goal is not being president of the United States, but selling out. So why should we be surprised when he hawks products while he’s sitting in the Oval Office? He’s already hawked My Pillow numerous times, but now we can add Goya Mexican Foods to the list.

President Donald Trump took to Twitter Wednesday morning as he sought to undermine the backlash Goya Foods has been facing from core Latino consumers after the company's chief executive, Robert Unanue, said "we are all truly blessed" to have Trump as a leader last week.

"Goya Foods is doing GREAT. The Radical Left smear machine backfired, people are buying like crazy!" Trump tweeted.

Trump's response led to more fresh calls from Latino consumers to boycott Goya, which says it's the nation's largest Hispanic-owned food brand.

Unanue's words praising Trump's leadership at a time when Latinos have been disproportionately hit by the health and economic consequences of the coronavirus pandemic did not sit well with many people who went online to post videos of themselves trashing Goya products or sharing homemade "adobo" and "sazón" recipes under the hashtags #BoycottGoya and #goyaway.

Seriously, you know the series finale is coming up when the characters start hawking products on the show! Beans, beans, the musical fruit! The more you eat, the more you toot. The more you toot, the better you feel! Let’s have beans for every meal! That joke would have killed in front of a live audience by the way. I miss live audiences. But getting back on topic, it seems Ivanka is hawking products too, and why not? This is 2020, yo!

The Trump family has long struggled in their promotion of food products — and even their efforts to make menu items look vaguely edible — but that didn’t stop Ivanka Trump from endorsing a can of Goya Foods black beans on Tuesday night. In elementary Spanish, she provided the latest entry in the uncanny genre of Trump-food pictures, clocking in on the horror scale somewhere between “GOP candidate eats bucket of chicken with a fork on a private plane” and “president turns the White House East Room into the fast-food Overlook Hotel.”

After Goya Foods CEO Robert Unanue appeared at the White House last week and said that the country was “blessed to have a leader” like President Trump, some consumers of the country’s largest Hispanic-owned food company said they would boycott the brand’s pantry staples. Gustavo Arellano, a Los Angeles Times reporter and the author of Taco USA: How Mexican Food Conquered America, told the New York Times that the comments were a betrayal for many Latinx consumers: “To see something that represents nurture and community and family and most importantly the kitchen? That’s where it’s a stab in the heart. Or the stomach.”

In her effort to make a can of beans the latest totem of the culture war, the tweet from the senior adviser to the president also appears to violate the ethical standards for executive-branch employees, who may not use public office for private gain or “for the endorsement of any product.” Past examples of White House officials endorsing products — specifically, Trump-family products — include Kellyanne Conway telling a Fox News audience to “go buy Ivanka’s stuff” and the president’s advertising of his Doral resort as the potential site of the G-7.

Ethics. Trump keeps using that word, I do not think it means what he thinks it means. So why is this so controversial? Because Trump just opened up a whole new can of worms turning the Resolute Desk into a Price Is Right game. So what’s the boycott really about? It’s not just about buying one brand of canned beans over the other, it’s about politics and privilege. Just ask real Latino folks!

When Ricardo Alvarado went grocery shopping this week, he had a list of items to buy, but he steered clear of anything from Goya Foods. “I was using their beans, but I found a different brand," he said. "I switched olive oil, too, and I bought my own spices, not theirs."

A performing artist based in New York City, Alvarado is boycotting Goya Foods. “As long as I’m helping my community, I will do my part. It’s important that we show unity and solidarity.”

The CEO of Goya Foods, Robert Unanue, plunged the company into turmoil last week when he praised President Donald Trump at an event announcing the White House Hispanic Prosperity Initiative. “We’re all truly blessed, at the same time, to have leader like President Trump who is a builder,” Unanue said. He compared the president to his grandfather, a Spanish immigrant who founded the company in 1936.

News of Unanue’s words spread quickly, and hashtags like #Goyaway and #BoycottGoya trended on social media.

Don’t buy that device, it will cause severe burns! And by the way if you pick sides in this battle, if your neighbor has a can of Goya beans in their cupboard, could be trouble. And if you side with an increasingly unpopular president, be prepared for the backlash, because it can sink your popularity faster than Superman can leap a 30 story building. Even if it sounds seemingly innocent.

Goya Foods is facing backlash following flattering comments made by the company's CEO in a show of support for President Trump, but a local church in South Florida is standing by the producer of Latino cuisine.

Though many are calling for boycotts of Goya products, the leaders at Alpha & Omega Church on 7800 Miller Drive in Miami told NBC 6 their partnership with the company will continue.

"We really like Goya because they have been helping us for years," said Pastor Esther Jivanjee. "They are not doing it now because of what's going on."

Last week, Robert Unanue, the CEO of Goya Foods, publicly praised President Trump during a press conference at the White House. Some consumers who were critical of Unanue's comments said they would stop buying Goya.

Jivanjee, however, does not think that Unanue's political beliefs make a difference as far as the company's operations are concerned. "We're proud that they have been helping," she said. "We say, 'If it's Goya, it has to be good.'"

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font]

From: Idiots #8-9

Let’s take a look at the relationship between India and the United States. The two countries are undergoing a dynamic shift in culture and thanks to social media propaganda, are shifting extremely far to the right. So why does India love Trump? Well as John Oliver pointed out, Trump and India’s PM Modi have a lot in common. They’re both loved and supported by nationalist extremists and they’re both self-centered egomaniacs who spend a lot of time on social media. That said, the differences between the two are uncanny. The only difference is that Trump doesn’t exactly participate in state sanctioned murder, at least not yet. We hope it doesn’t come to that.

A potentially brilliant foreign policy strategy unfolded last week during President Trump’s trip to India. Hardly anyone in America knows that, or has been talking about it, because it’s hard to find a journalist who filed an interesting or insightful story from New Delhi.

Trump’s visit to India reflected a complex approach for strengthening America’s hand in South Asia and triangulating Russia, China and India in Central Asia. But, rather than assessing what was happening on this trip from a geopolitical perspective, most journalists subjected Americans to a predictable Trump-diminishing snarkfest. A central storyline was that Trump flew halfway around the world to get the adulation of 100,000 Indians in a cricket stadium, broadcasted back to the U.S. at 3 a.m. Eastern time. Pseudo-psychologist commentators branded the trip an effort to “seek adulation” and “a sightseeing tour.”

But, as they like to say, here is the breaking news: Any day of any week, Trump could fill stadiums from Cleveland to Dallas with 100,000 cheering Americans who actually could vote for him, rather than flying a grueling 20 hours to India for affirmation. Actually, global power politics took place under the noses of an evidently clueless press corps and major agreements were discussed that could change the balance of power in Asia.

You first. Come on, we elected the meanest, most self-centered jackass in American history. But is it any wonder why we’re going to shit? Trump isn’t just a side effect he’s the problem. Don’t worry, we will get to what he did with the food in a minute. But Trump’s idea of diplomacy isn’t exactly bringing what one would call “peace and good will”. Instead, Trump’s level of diplomacy is chaos and destruction. Think the Gotham riot scene in the Joker movie.

U.S. President Donald Trump visited India last week for the first time. The trip packed in a massive welcome rally in Indian Prime Minister Narendra Modi’s home state of Gujarat – one that Trump is unlikely to forget – and an array of deals touching upon defense, telecom, energy, and so on.

Modi wished to use Trump’s visit for various political and economic gains. The Modi government has suffered from international backlash against policies such as the controversial Citizenship Amendment Act (CAA) and the lockdown in Kashmir. This was an opportunity for Modi to rebuild his image. Further, India is also in desperate need of foreign investment to fight record levels of unemployment and boost sagging demand in its economy.

Yet, for the most part, these objectives were undermined during Trump’s visit, as the world’s eyes were transfixed elsewhere. Not far from Trump’s hotel in Delhi, communal riots erupted, resulting in an ever-increasing death toll and pulling away the attention of the international press corps who were accompanying the president. The riots turned out to be Delhi’s worst since the 1984 communal violence against the Sikh community. And even Trump himself admitted to having talked to Modi about the importance of religious freedom during their meeting.

Trump is the Arthur Fleck of presidents. If he actually did shoot someone on 5th Avenue, I could guarantee that he could utter the line “YOU GET WHAT YOU FUCKING DESERVE!” and it would not feel out of place! And guess what? With all that diplomacy they got very little to show for it. It was pretty much a MAGA rally in another country and it began and ended nearly the same as that rally in New Jersey a couple weeks ago did – disappointed fans and large piles of trash.

India’s prime minister, Narendra Modi, has Donald Trump’s number. More to the point, he understands the president’s obsession with numbers. How many people attended Trump’s inauguration? You guessed it. More than were present at any previous presidential inauguration. Trump’s IQ? Right again; it’s “one of the highest” and exceeds that of several really smart people, including, of course, former President Barack Obama. The intelligence of the participants on Trump’s former television show, The Apprentice? Well, they are geniuses with IQs that nudge two hundred. And so it goes.

Little wonder then that Modi assured Trump that vast numbers of admirers—five to seven million people, according to the president—would show up to greet him in Ahmedabad, the largest city in Gujarat, Modi’s home state. Let’s go with a charitable interpretation: something must have gotten garbled in translation. Ahmedabad’s population totals 8.6 million, so even Modi, who has his own fascination with numbers (he claims to have a fifty-six-inch chest), couldn’t possibly have mobilized his many minions to muster a crowd that met Trump’s outlandish expectations.

The prime minister did deliver on another front, though. He doubtless knows that Trump loves big walls and had some built to grace the occasion. Modi’s wall was four feet high and nearly a kilometer long. Its purpose: to ensure that the president’s delicate sensibilities wouldn’t be offended by the sight of slums during his motorcade from the airport. India’s poor population apparently shame Modi and had to be erased for the August occasion, which lasted all of thirty-six hours. Trump then promptly departed, having seen the Taj Mahal as well the fawning posters hailing the greatness of the American president and his host. An example: “Two Dynamic Leaders: One Momentous Occasion.” Kim Jong-un couldn’t have done better.

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[font size="8"]Who’s Profiting From The Pandemic???
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From: Idiots #8-13

By now everyone knows that the first case of the highly contagious and very deadly coronavirus was confirmed by the WHO on 12/31/19. And we know that in that length of time, Trump went golfing 6 times, held 3 fundraisers and also held 5 MAGA rallies. During that whole time he downplayed the true dangers of this deadly disease. And while we were being distracted, the Senate knew that it was coming, and what they did next will make your blood fucking boil. Guess what they did? They profited off the pandemic. Yes, they sold stocks that they knew were going to tank because of this thing, before the stock market went into a free fall. Hold your boos.

Four senators sold stocks shortly after a January briefing in the Senate on the novel coronavirus outbreak, unloading shares that plummeted in value a month later as the stock market crashed in the face of a global pandemic.

According to financial disclosure forms, Sens. Kelly Loeffler (R-Ga.), James Inhofe (R-Okla.), Dianne Feinstein (D-Calif.) and Richard Burr (R-N.C.) each sold hundreds of thousands of dollars in stocks within days of the Senate holding a classified briefing on Jan. 24 with Trump administration officials on the threat of the coronavirus outbreak.

The sales raise questions about whether the senators violated the STOCK Act, a law that bans members of Congress from making financial trades based on nonpublic information.

Loeffler and her husband, who is the chairman of the New York Stock Exchange, sold at least $355,000 in stocks from Jan. 24-31, according to Senate records, after the coronavirus briefing hosted by the Senate Health and Foreign Relations committees.

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Normally this would be a number one entry in the Top 10 any other week but in this world that’s been upended by the virus, this gets bumped to number 4! I mean there’s no way that anyone involved in this should get a “get out of jail free” card. While we’re scrambling to find supplies, these monsters profited. And they should not be allowed to get away with it!

Senator Richard Burr has called for an ethics investigation into himself and three other senators who sold off stock after receiving classified briefings on the coronavirus threat.

Burr—a North Carolina Republican who is chairman of the Senate Intelligence Committee—sold up to $1.72 million in stock through Feb. 13, shortly before reassuring the public that the government had a handle on the coronavirus response. A week later, the S&P 500 Index started what would become a 30% drop, wiping out most gains made since President Donald Trump's inauguration.

In a tweet on Friday, Burr denied any wrongdoing, saying that he “relied solely on public news reports” to inform his decisions.

Here’s how well those stocks performed after he sold them.

Another senator under scrutiny, Georgia Republican Kelly Loeffler, sold off millions of dollars worth of stock beginning on Jan. 24, the day the health committee she sits on was briefed by U.S. public-health officials.

You got that right sir! This is unquestionably what one might call a “dick move”. And it’s such a dick move that they knew this was coming and rather than sound they alarm, they opened up their wallets because, why not? This is America!! This is huge, and this is certainly one of the most evil, egregious acts that has ever happened. Crap, they put Martha Stewart away for less than this! Just how bad is this whole thing? Well it gets worse!

Sen. Kelly Loeffler of Georgia and her husband, Intercontinental Exchange Chairman Jeff Sprecher, disclosed additional stock trades as they faced criticism for dumping shares before the market plummeted over the coronavirus crisis, The Atlanta Journal-Constitution reported on Tuesday.

Last month, both Loeffler and Sprecher, who is also the chairman of the New York Stock Exchange, came under scrutiny for selling hundreds of thousands of dollars in stock before the market's drop.

The Daily Beast reported last month that after she attended a January 24 closed-door US Senate briefing on the COVID-19 outbreak, Loeffler sold hundreds of thousands of dollars in shares of Resideo Technologies, Comcast, AutoZone, and more before the decline and also bought up shares in Citrix, a company that makes telecommuting software.

On Tuesday, The Journal-Constitution reported that newly disclosed stock transactions from early March involved the sale of retail stocks, which have seen a sharp decline as the industry suffers from the outbreak. Loeffler sold over $70,000 in shares of the retailer Ross on March 4 and 5; $27,000 in shares of TJX Cos., the parent company of TJ Maxx; and over $56,000 in shares of Lululemon, a popular athleisure clothing brand.

I wouldn’t go that far, but considering over twice as many people have died from this wretched virus as have died in 9/11, it’s not that far of a stretch. So we know that four senators have made untold money on this deadly pandemic. Not only did they dump retail stocks, it gets worse! They also dumped travel stocks because they knew a travel ban is coming. These are people who are going to have to answer for their crimes.

Senator Kelly Loeffler sold a total of $46,027 worth of stock in an online travel company in the day leading up to President Donald Trump’s announcement of a ban on most European travel to the U.S.

Though the transactions were relatively small for Loeffler and her husband -- whose net worth is estimated at more than $500 million -- the sales represented an about-face.

Loeffler, a Georgia Republican, had just days earlier purchased the shares, in Booking Holdings, jointly with her husband, Jeffrey Sprecher, the chief executive officer of Intercontinental Exchange, parent firm of the New York Stock Exchange

Booking Holdings provides online bookings for flights, hotels and other travel-related services, all of which have collapsed because of the Covid-19 pandemic.

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[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: DIY Hydroxychloroquine
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From: Idiots #8-14

Now entering the spin zone! And it lands on… wait for it… ah hey it’s time for a clip without context!

In that case then call me Satan! Because I want the damn vaccine, damn it! Spin it again! Hey it’s time for Top 10 Investigates! It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates!

With the coronavirus upending our society and way of life as we currently know it, the idea of self-medication becomes ever more prevalent as doctors and hospitals are being repurposed to deal with this evolving and unprecedented crisis. One such medication being touted by President Trump is an old malaria drug called hydroxychloroquine and also the regular chloroquine. But the hype of this drug from the right wing media is illustrating why we need doctors to guide us through this pandemic and why we shouldn’t listen to hype men and product pitchmen. Because this is serious and taken in the wrong capacity, the cure really is worse than the disease.

A malaria drug widely touted by President Donald Trump for treating the new coronavirus showed no benefit in a large analysis of its use in U.S. veterans hospitals. There were more deaths among those given hydroxychloroquine versus standard care, researchers reported.

The nationwide study was not a rigorous experiment. But with 368 patients, it’s the largest look so far of hydroxychloroquine with or without the antibiotic azithromycin for COVID-19, which has killed more than 171,000 people as of Tuesday.

The study was posted on an online site for researchers and has not been reviewed by other scientists. Grants from the National Institutes of Health and the University of Virginia paid for the work.

Researchers analyzed medical records of 368 male veterans hospitalized with confirmed coronavirus infection at Veterans Health Administration medical centers who died or were discharged by April 11.

About 28% who were given hydroxychloroquine plus usual care died, versus 11% of those getting routine care alone. About 22% of those getting the drug plus azithromycin died too, but the difference between that group and usual care was not considered large enough to rule out other factors that could have affected survival.

So when people are getting desperate to find a cure and get back to the way things were before the virus you’re going to get desperate. And that’s what is happening right now. Yes, there might have been a few successes with hydroxychloroquine, but there’s been more failures and the drug has yet to be proven to work long term. Which is why even Trump himself has turned down the rhetoric.

President Donald Trump and his allies in conservative media have subtly scaled down their hyping of hydroxychloroquine as a potential cure for the coronavirus, according to a POLITICO review of White House briefings and cable news coverage.

Although Trump had repeatedly promoted the decades-old malaria drug since the early days of the disease’s outbreak in the United States, his public statements regarding hydroxychloroquine have diminished significantly over the past week for reasons that remain unclear.

His most recent mention of the drug at the White House’s daily coronavirus news conferences came last Tuesday, when the president announced his administration had deployed roughly 28 million doses of hydroxychloroquine from the federal government’s Strategic National Stockpile.

Earlier at that same briefing, though, the president also trumpeted remdesivir, another experimental treatment developed by the biopharmaceutical company Gilead, and spoke positively of its “promising results.”

Yeah you probably should there, doctor. In fact the idea of hyrdroxychloroquine has become big business, even if it is a lot of false hope. And false hope is not something we need right now. But what will make this worse is that repurposing this drug takes away from people who actually need it, like lupus patients for instance. Yes, they need this drug, and thanks to Trump, they cant find it.

When Aimee Blou heard the lupus drug she has relied on for more than a decade promoted as a coronavirus antidote, she visited her pharmacist.

The 40-year-old woman from Stockton, California, was told the decades-old antimalarial drug commonly prescribed for lupus and rheumatoid arthritis was in short supply. She would get only a 30-day refill, not her typical 90-day supply.

“It’s all backordered,” the pharmacist explained to Blou on March 23. “We are not going to be able to give you these (90-day) refills."

Hydroxychloroquine, also sold under the brand name Plaquenil, has been touted by President Donald Trump, media personality Mehmet Oz and others as a COVID-19 treatment, though scientific evidence the drug is effective against the virus is lacking.

The renewed interest in chloroquine, an antimalarial drug available since 1944, and the similar drug hydroxychloroquine has made it difficult for pharmacies and hospital chains to manage a limited supplies, leaving patients like Blou fearful the shortage will harm their health.

In this case you probably should. Because this fight is going to get very ugly very quickly and this is a can of worms being opened up that you definitely shouldn’t open up. Let’s take it from someone who’s actually had the virus and actually used the drug to combat the virus. And their experiences were shall we say, less than ideal.

Tom Hanks is getting personal about the coronavirus battle that he and his wife Rita Wilson experienced.

The actor says although he didn't have symptoms as bad as Wilson, he felt "wiped" while in isolation at a hospital in Queensland, Australia, last month.

"I was wiped after 12 minutes [of exercising]. I laid down in my hospital bed and just slept," Hanks told National Defense Radio Show.

He recalled telling a medical professional who was treating him at the time, "'I just had the weirdest thing. I just tried to do basic stretches and exercises on the floor and I couldn't even get halfway through.' And she looked at me through her glasses like she was talking to the dumbest human being. And she said, 'You have Covid-19.'"

Hanks said that his wife had such bad nausea from the anti-malaria drug hydroxychloroquine, that at times she couldn't even walk.

That’s it this week for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

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[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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From: Idiots #9-9

Gather around my fair brothers and sisters! It’s time to take a seat in the virtual pew make an online donation in the LAWRD’s virtual collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it’s time to remind you that the holiest among us are the most full of:

My fair virtual congregation! You know it’s not my style to engage in a bit of schadenfreude because that’s not what the good LAWRD JAYSUS would want. But when it involves an institution that is widely known for spreading HERESY and worshipping the unholy, ungodly dark one, whose name shall not be mentioned in my church – real or virtual, then exceptions must be made! But here’s the thing my fair flock, that still come to us week after week to put up with my nonsense, Liberty University was a well oiled machine that actually had some credibility. Then their founder died and made the asshole son president, who worships the unholy, ungodly Dark One, whose name shall not be mentioned in my church! That’s when things started to go predictably south.

A few days after Jerry Falwell Jr. buried his father in 2007, an author writing about the family visited Falwell Jr.’s office and made what he thought was an obvious comment. With the death of Jerry Falwell Sr., a charismatic religious-right titan, Falwell Jr. was about to become president of a Christian mega-university as the heir of the extremely famous brand name.

“I said: ‘You’re really in the spotlight now, eh?’ ” said Dirk Smillie, then a Forbes writer working on a book about the family and the booming university Falwell Sr. had created in the foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains in central Virginia. “If I was in his place, I’d expect a number of emotions. But instead he had this look like he was being taken to the guillotine, like: ‘This is, like, the last thing I want to do.’ He was dreading the visibility that would come from having to replace what his father had engineered.”

Over the next 13 years, Falwell Jr. transformed from a shy, reclusive real estate developer and lawyer nervous in public settings to a highflying national figure — known not only for his leadership of the country’s most prominent evangelical university, which boasts 85,000 students, but also for a long series of controversial social media posts — some criticized as Islamophobic, sexist and racist — and for his zealous public defense of President Trump.

Earlier this month, in the minds of Liberty leaders, he went too far. On Aug. 7 Falwell Jr. was put on an indefinite leave of absence from the presidency after he posted a provocative Instagram photo of himself posing with his wife’s assistant.

Of course! You cannot support the unholy Dark One because everything he touches turns to absolute shit! Remember, we are allowed to swear in my church! Remember that movie from a few years ago called Horrible Bosses? Jerry Falwell Jr is the dim son who takes over the family business and doesn’t have a clue how to run it. Which is probably how he lost control of the message so easily!

As president and chancellor of the country’s largest Christian university and the son of one of the founding fathers of the religious right, Jerry Falwell Jr. has come to serve as a stand-in for American evangelicals. But to those inside the Liberty University community, Falwell’s leading role has lately seemed more like a liability than an asset. On Friday, the executive committee of the school’s board announced that Falwell will take an indefinite leave of absence.

Alumni feel “they have to hide their association with Liberty,” Colby Garman, a pastor who graduated from Liberty and serves on the board of Virginia’s Southern Baptist Convention, told me by phone Friday night. “A lot of pastors feel that way, a little bit, when it comes to the leadership of the school.” (Falwell did not reply to my request for an interview.)

What finally pushed Liberty’s leaders to act was their belief that Falwell had openly flaunted immoral behavior: He posted, and then deleted, an image of himself on a yacht, his arm around the waist of a young woman who was not his wife. Both of their pants were partially unzipped, and a glass of what looked like alcohol—which he called “black water” in his caption—was in Falwell’s hand. Later, in an interview with a local radio station in Lynchburg, Virginia, where Liberty is located, Falwell explained that the woman works as an assistant to his wife. He laughed the incident off: “I promised my kids I’m going to try to be a good boy from here on out,” he said. But alumni and staff who had previously expressed their concerns about Falwell in private began openly calling for his resignation, including Representative Mark Walker of North Carolina; many of them noted that any number of Falwell’s actions would have gotten a Liberty student written up.

So Liberty University has gone over the edge. Guess you can say that we tried to warn them because that’s what you get when you trust the unholy Dark One. Everything he touches dies! Instead, you must trust the good LAWRD JAYSUS! Of course you can see why Liberty is currently in shambles and one incident must be what pushed them over the edge! You can’t trust how things are going right now.

Jerry Falwell Jr., the president and chancellor of Liberty University, has agreed to take an "indefinite leave of absence," according to a statement Friday from the evangelical Christian university.

The leave of absence is effective immediately, the statement said. The executive committee of the university's board of trustees made the request of Falwell. The board did not provide a reason for Falwell's leave in its statement.

CNN has reached out to Falwell for comment. In a separate statement, Jerry Prevo, chairman of the university's board of trustees, said the Lynchburg, Virginia-based university has "experienced unprecedented success" during Falwell's 13 years as president.

"Unfortunately, with this success and the burdens of leading a large and growing organization comes substantial pressure," Prevo said in the statement. "Today, my colleagues and I on the Liberty University Board of Trustees and Jerry mutually agreed that it would be good for him to take an indefinite leave of absence."

Except when there is judgement of course, and I speak of that in the Good Book, which you can now buy online for the low low price of $19.99! But yeah this is the incident I am referring to that got Mr. Falwell ousted from his own school. Really don’t do this people, and especially don’t be partying on a boat during a pandemic. But once again everything the Dark One touches dies!

The executive committee did not provide a reason, but the request comes several days after Falwell posted -- and then deleted -- a photograph on Instagram with his pants unzipped and his arm around a woman, The New York Times reported.

According to WSLS, the caption on the post -- which has been deleted -- reads, “More vacation shots. Lots of good friends visited us on the yacht. I promise that’s just black water in my glass. It was a prop only.”

On Thursday, Rep. Mark Walker, R-N.C., a Southern Baptist minister and former Liberty instructor, called for Falwell’s resignation, according to The Washington Post.

“Jerry Falwell Jr’s ongoing behavior is appalling,” Walker tweeted. “I’m convinced Falwell should step down.”

On Friday, Walker tweeted that the move was the right call for the university and offered prayers for Falwell and his family.

So we must not celebrate or pity Rev Falwell, rather, just heed this warning as a caution of things not to do in dire times! Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Beating A Dead Horse: Ryan Reynolds Wedding
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From: Idiots #9-8

Let’s talk about weddings. Everyone has their vision of the perfect marriage ceremony. Beautiful backdrops, everyone’s friends and family there, ravishing looking wedding parties, free flowing booze, and an overall good time. But could you regret where you have said wedding? Well, lately with racism being erased all over the world after the death of George Floyd, it’s hit the glorious star of everyone’s favorite wise-cracking, foul-mouthed, murderous superhero Deadpool, the great Ryan Reynolds, pretty hard. See, he and his wife Blake Lively got married at one of America’s oldest plantations. Which sounds pretty innocent until you start digging deeper and find out the true history of where he got married.

"Deadpool" star Ryan Reynolds said he and his wife, actress Blake Lively, are "deeply and unreservedly sorry for" for holding their 2012 wedding ceremony at a South Carolina plantation.

"It’s impossible to reconcile," Reynolds told Fast Company, in a profile published Tuesday. "What we saw at the time was a wedding venue on Pinterest. What we saw after was a place built upon devastating tragedy."

Reynolds and Lively got married at Boone Hall Plantation in Mount Pleasant, which features nine slave cabins, referred to as "Slave Street." The move was criticized at the time, but came under renewed scrutiny in 2018 after Reynolds tweeted in support of "Black Panther," the first superhero movie to feature a majority Black cast, and was accused of hypocrisy.

The wedding industry has also been responding to plantation weddings' role in glamorizing sites of violence against Black people. Last year, Pinterest and The Knot banned pictures of all plantation weddings on its platform, including Reynolds' and Lively's.

That’s like what? 16 walls? Yes, that probably was a bad idea to begin with. And this might be a good topic to explore in the future but who knew that weddings could be racist? I mean aside from when your creepy drunk uncle gets up during the toasts and makes uncomfortable remarks about white supremacist content he found on Facebook – and hey we’ve all been there, right? So why is this not OK to do something like this?

When planning their nuptials, some couples dream of having a “classic Southern” wedding at a grand, columned mansion with oak trees covered in Spanish moss and fireflies winking at dusk—a picturesque affair hosted on an antebellum estate that has made its facilities available to rent for parties and events. In other words, a plantation wedding.

But there’s a growing consensus that there’s something deeply wrong with this concept. A beautiful mansion and sprawling estate cannot be separated from a horrifying violent history. These are monuments to American slavery, not a place to hold a celebration or a backdrop for beautiful photos. “If anyone wanted to get married at a plantation, you must ask, ‘What are you doing?’ ‘what exactly are you saying about yourself?’” says Steven Hahn, a historian and the author of A Nation Without Borders: The United States and its World in an Age of Civil Wars.

White Southerners may be the most likely candidates to choose a plantation wedding, as it might be the popular venue in the area, but they are far from alone. Speaking to representatives for plantations like Middleton Place near Charleston, they say that people from all over the world, of all races and genders, opt to have their ceremony and reception there.

There are even celebrity examples. Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds (who are from California and Vancouver, respectively) married in 2012 at Boone Plantation in South Carolina. Though they received mostly positive coverage at the time, it has sparked criticism on social media since and it is something Reynolds says he and Lively now deeply regret. “It’s something we’ll always be deeply and unreservedly sorry for,” Reynolds recently told Fast Company.

No wonder Southern people are always clamoring for “heritage” – they want that sweet, sweet Antebellum lifestyle! Which really if you think about it, is really just a trashy version of the rich life from Pride & Prejudice. Mr. Reynolds would say that this is a mistake. But that said, I am sure that Deadpool would be mocking you before slicing and dicing you after saying that. I’m just saying.

In the wake of the racial justice movement renewed by the death of George Floyd, Ryan Reynolds apologized for his plantation wedding with Blake Lively. The two wed in 2012 at Boone Hall Plantation in Charleston, South Carolina, a location fraught with painful history as a site where Black slaves lived and produced bricks and crops. (Pinterest and The Knot have since restricted promotions of plantation weddings.) In an interview with Fast Company on Aug. 4, Reynolds said the decision is one that he and Lively will “always be deeply and unreservedly sorry for" — and that it was "impossible to reconcile."

“What we saw at the time was a wedding venue on Pinterest," Reynolds said. "What we saw after was a place built upon devastating tragedy.” He revealed that the two got married a second time at home — but “shame works in weird ways.” Reynolds continued, “A giant f*cking mistake like that can either cause you to shut down or it can reframe things and move you into action. It doesn’t mean you won’t f*ck up again.” He added that “repatterning and challenging lifelong social conditioning is a job that doesn’t end.”

The interview comes after Reynolds and Lively donated $200,000 to the NAACP Legal Defense and Educational Fund in June and acknowledged their own history of complicity. “We want to educate ourselves about other people’s experiences and talk to our kids about everything, all of it,” Lively wrote on Instagram, in part. “We look back and see so many mistakes which have led us to deeply examine who we are and who we want to become.” She also pledged that she and Reynolds would “stay educated and vote in every local election” — and use their “privilege and platform to be an ally."

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[font size="8"]Conspiracy Corner
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From: Idiots #9-6

Welcome back to the segment that attempts to explain the unexplainable! It’s Conspiracy Corner! Oh hello, I am broadcasting the inner most thoughts from deep inside my brain from an underground bunker in the vast cornfields of the rural Iowa farmlands! Of course it’s an undisclosed location! Just let me adjust my tin foil hat for maximum government blockage. They are trying to read my thoughts and your thoughts after all. So this week, an extra dose of crazy happened as Trump’s favorite cult Q Anon attempted to dig up some dirt on furniture purveyor Wayfair, and not only did it backfire on them spectacularly, they have lost one of their biggest social media hangouts where they can wreak their brand of conspiracy theory havoc!

The claim: Expensive products on Wayfair are coded listings for missing children being sold in a human-trafficking scheme

The internet has been gripped with a conspiracy theory this month as thousands of viral posts allege that online furniture firm Wayfair is involved in a child sex-trafficking operation.

“So wayfair has third party vendors that are HUMAN SEX TRAFFICKING on their website,” various social media posts have alleged. “There are items like throw pillows, cabinets etc. priced at 10-20,000 dollars and named after missing girls. PLEASE BE CAREFUL!!”

Posts point to the high prices of items like pillows and dressers as evidence that the products are secretly fronts for child trafficking. Theorists further note the names of some of the dressers, which are allegedly the same children who have gone missing over the past few years.

Some users also allege similar activities occur on other e-commerce sites like Amazon, Etsy and Walmart. Others claim the scandal can only be tracked by using the Russian search engine Yandex.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! Put a warning label on that one! But seriously, Q Anon has gone full batshit, and in a world where we currently don’t have anything to do, can we at least get something to do for the Q Anon nuts? Because they clearly need a hobby, and this one ain’t it. So who started this insane conspiracy theory? And why are they so convinced? Yeah right now we’re trying to survive a horrible pandemic and retailers might be going a little overboard with price gouging, but not this.

Last weekend, an unsubstantiated conspiracy theory that online furnishings retailer Wayfair is trafficking children through listings of products with inflated prices and human names erupted on social media.

An Arizona couple helped fuel the rumor by posting on Instagram that they had purchased a $17,000 desk from Wayfair and would share their experience with their followers.

The theory that pillows and cabinets being sold at wayfair.com for thousands of dollars is somehow evidence of a child trafficking scheme has been debunked by independent fact-checking publication Snopes. It gained traction through a July 9 Reddit post on a forum dedicated to discussing conspiracy theories, Snopes notes.

Maddie and Justin Thompson, of Gilbert, are not convinced.

Well I guess that’s one way to go furniture shopping right now! But yeah sure, buy a $17,000 desk and it contains a… child? How did that one get past the loading docks? Really, these people are fucking batshit crazy, and they really need to find a hobby. But you know what is not to be done? Don’t overload the national child sex trafficking hotline with bullshit conspiracy theories, OK? This is a fake crisis, don’t make it a real one!

A national organization fighting to end human trafficking says the believers in the unfounded Wayfair human trafficking conspiracy theory are overwhelming the organization with reports and making it harder to do its work.

Polaris, a non-profit that runs the National Human Trafficking Hotline, said in a press release on Tuesday that "the extreme volume of these contacts has made it more difficult for the Trafficking Hotline to provide support and attention to others who are in need of help."

Polaris said that the reports included no information "beyond what has been widely shared online. Nor have any of these reports been made by someone who has a specific connection to any alleged missing children."

Believers in the conspiracy theory think that the furniture company is selling human children who have gone missing by disguising them as pillows and other goods. The theory went viral in the last few weeks after being spread by QAnon believers on Twitter and Facebook, though both platforms told Insider they had removed certain posts containing this misinformation.

Yes, we get it, this is one of the worst crimes imaginable. But why the fuck are you so obsessed with it right now? I get that we don’t have anything to do. Really, don’t waste Wayfair’s time, and don’t waste the time of actual officials who are trying to find real sex traffickers. And by the way this can have some real world consequences for you if you get caught trying to do this. So really, shut the fuck up and keep the batshit insanity to yourself.

Twitter (TWTR) has removed thousands of accounts linked to QAnon, a group known for spreading conspiracy theories and disinformation online.
"We've been clear that we will take strong enforcement action on behavior that has the potential to lead to offline harm," Twitter's safety team said late Tuesday in a tweet. "In line with this approach, this week we are taking further action on so-called 'QAnon' activity across the service."

More than 7,000 accounts have been removed in the last several weeks, according to Twitter. It also expects that additional actions it is taking to limit the reach of QAnon activity on its platform could affect 150,000 accounts worldwide.
QAnon began as a single conspiracy theory. But its followers now act more like a virtual cult, largely adoring and believing whatever disinformation the conspiracy community spins up.

Its main conspiracy theories claim dozens of politicians and A-list celebrities work in tandem with governments around the globe to engage in child sex abuse. Followers also believe there is a "deep state" effort to annihilate President Donald Trump.

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[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
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From: Idiots #9-11

Hit it!

Of course you know by now that people are people and people are dumb. While we were off for the Labor Day holiday, stupid obviously never takes a holiday! So who is dumb this week? Well first, Dr. Phil is dumb. Yes, the fake TV psychiatrist that Oprah unwittingly leashed upon the masses continues to prove why he should not be practicing any medicine. Hell, he doesn’t understand the unwritten rules of social media! And one of those rules is that you don’t tell people what to do! No! if you tell someone to do something, they’re only going to want to do more of this. Especially when we’re in a pandemic and everyone is bored out of their skulls!

Dr. Phil McGraw popped up on TikTok on Thursday to pop off to his followers who keep calling him “Daddy.”

It seems that a lot of people who follow his posts refer to him as “Daddy” in the comments and he’s apparently annoyed.

So as part of the app’s popular “you have to stop” posts, McGraw asked his TikTok fans to cease the patriarchal nicknames when commenting on his posts.

“I hate to break it to you, but I ain’t your daddy, and your real daddy is probably getting his feelings hurt,” McGraw said. “I appreciate the support — it’s a little weird, but I appreciate the support.”


#YouHaveTo stop calling me “daddy.” I ain’t ya daddy.
♬ you have to stop supporting trump - hannah_harpist

And because this is the internet, everyone immediately respected his wishes ― not!

Damn right!! You don’t tell the internet what to do, Dr. Phil! No, no, no, no, no, no. Next up – let’s go across the pond to France! As we have proven on this program time and time again, there’s stupid people no matter what country you go to. But in this particular case, we all get annoyed with bugs and insects. But this might not be the best way to go about doing things. In fact, you could put a “DON’T TRY THIS AT HOME” warning on this next story.

The man, who is in his 80s, was about to tuck into his dinner when he became irritated by a fly buzzing around him.

He picked up an electric racket designed to kill bugs and start swatting at it - but a gas canister was leaking in his Dordogne home.

A reaction between the racket and the gas caused an explosion, destroying the kitchen and partly damaging the roof of the home in Parcoul-Chenaud village.

According to local media, the unnamed man had a lucky escape, sustaining just a burn to the hand.


Yeah something like that. Next up – you know much of the country is experiencing devastating wildfires, and I swear that it’s Mother Nature’s way of saying she’s bound and determined to get rid of us once and for all. And you can spout your conspiracy theories, believe me. But one thing you should never ever do? How about don’t set off fucking explosives in a dry climate on the hottest day of the year? What could go wrong?

At the time of writing there are 7,718 fires raging across California, 20 people have lost their lives, and nearly 5,000 buildings have been destroyed. The ignition of one of these fires caught the attention of the press, and the internet, more than others.

On September 5, an explosion of coloured smoke revealed the gender of a Californian couple’s soon to be born child, and simultaneously set light to over 10,000 acres of the El Dorado Ranch Park in Yuaipa.

Gender-reveal parties, relatively unheard of just a few years ago, have now become an important rite of passage for expectant parents in the US. Seen by some as an unhelpful reinforcement of binary gender stereotypes, these parties have long been the source of mockery by the internet. Years of one-upmanship have seen ever more extravagant reveals posted to social media – cake cutting, mass dance performances, balloons dropped from planes, and, increasingly, pyrotechnics.

So, when a gender-reveal party started the El Dorado fire, it was bound to draw attention. Memes and spoof articles soon appeared, and the mainstream media latched on to the story. The idea that the fires were started by human stupidity is one we actually find appealing, and almost comforting. But this narrative hides a very uncomfortable truth.

Yeah seriously don’t do anything that dumb. There are limits people! Next up – the state of Florida always brings the crazy! We make fun of America’s most penis-shaped state but it does have some of the craziest people alive! For instance this particular story out of Port St. Lucie, Florida. Now I love me some bacon, but don’t get your bacon and your cocaine mixed up, that’s mistake number one. Mistake number two? Don’t keep either one in the backseat of your car for an extended period of time.

PORT ST. LUCIE, Fla. — A Florida man was arrested Wednesday after deputies found more than a pound of cocaine in his truck and even more at his home, including some on top of a stack of bacon.

The St. Lucie County Sheriff’s Office said Clifford Eugene Tindall was pulled over around 7 p.m. and deputies found a bag filled with nearly a pound of cocaine in the back seat, TC Palm reported.

Deputies found more cocaine during a search of his home around 9 p.m. Some cocaine was found “directly on top of a stack of bacon,” investigators said.
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Tindall, 62, was arrested and charged with two counts of cocaine trafficking, according to jail records. He was released on $70,000 bond.

Of course! Finally this week, we go to that most senior of all Florida cities, The Villages! And yes many times during the course of this horrible administration I’ve been there, and we have all been there. But if Trump drives you to drink, maybe don’t tell this as your excuse to the cops. Me personally? I’m going to go have a few cold ones after this because well, Trump and the COVID pandemic are really driving me to drink.

A man who crashed his golf cart while driving it drunk through The Villages said he was driven to drink after watching President Donald Trump on TV, according to the Sumter County Sheriff’s Office.

Deputies said they were called to a single-vehicle golf cart crash the evening of July 30 on Rainey Trail and Buena Vista Boulevard and when they questioned the driver, 82-year-old Cary De Van, he said he hit a wall inside the golf cart tunnel while driving home.

De Van’s red golf cart had what appeared to be a broken axle, leading deputies to believe he ran over a concrete curb, records show.

The report said De Van was slurring his words and smelled of alcohol as deputies were questioning him about the crash. De Van was not injured and no property was damaged during the crash.

He claimed that about two hours prior, he saw Trump speaking on TV and “then got really mad at what he said” so he started drinking vodka, according to authorities.

That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Road To The White House: Trump Bails On Debate
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From: Idiots #9-14

Welcome back to…. Cue reverb… ROAD TO THE WHITE HOUSE!! Oh man that was some good reverb there. Last week, which seems like an eternity ago this year, we covered the first presidential debates and of course the term “shit show” doesn’t even begin to describe it. Of course we are in a raging pandemic and all rules about the way society is supposed to function are thrown out the window, and we are in an election year at that! But then again Trump is still our president, and he refuses to abide by the rules. So put those two things together and the question is asked – is there a possibility there will even be a second debate? To which I answer: “are you fucking kidding me?”.

It seemed novel when Donald Trump boycotted the final debate before the Iowa caucuses four years ago.

This time, polls and the timing of the election suggest, it looks more like a mistake.

Twenty-six days before the election, more than 6.3 million people have already voted, according to the United States Elections Project, and that number is ballooning by the day. In declaring Thursday he wouldn't do a remote debate, he's surrendering an opportunity, with an audience of tens millions, to turn around his campaign.

“I don’t see how he catches up to and passes [Joe] Biden without two more debates,” said Frank Luntz, the veteran Republican consultant and pollster. “While an online debate is clearly problematic, no debate at all is worse.”

Trump's reelection prospects are already precarious, at best. He is running behind Biden by nearly 10 percentage points nationally, and he has given up so much ground in battleground states that Biden is expanding the map into states that Trump was once expected to win comfortably, like Texas and Ohio.
https://ww w.politico.com/news/2020/10/08/trump-debate-boycott-428039

So rather than play by the rules and hold a virtual rally, Trump instead is going out on his own and holding super spreader events! So what happens if Trump decides to again bail on the second debate – it’s widely known that he’s infected with COVID and continues to infect everyone in his path, so the idea of holding an in-person debate is out of the question. But there’s no mistaking that Trump is an abusive, obnoxious jerk and would love to give Biden the virus if he could!

The fate of the final debates between President Donald Trump and Democrat Joe Biden was thrown into uncertainty Thursday as the campaigns offered dueling proposals for moving forward with a process that has been upended by the president’s coronavirus infection.

By Thursday afternoon, it was unclear when or how the next debates would proceed, or whether voters would even get to see the two men running for the White House on the same stage again before Election Day.

The whipsaw day began with an announcement from the nonpartisan Commission on Presidential Debates, which said the next debate on Oct. 15 would be held virtually. The commission cited health concerns following Trump’s infection as the reason for changing the structure of the town hall-style debate.

Trump, who is eager to return to the campaign trail despite uncertainty about his health, said he wouldn’t participate if the debate wasn’t in person. Biden suggested the event be delayed a week until Oct. 22, which is when the third and final debate is already scheduled.

That is true and Trump is quite the evil fucker. In fact not only does he have COVID, he’s flying out to Florida (obviously) to do another in-person campaign event. And of course his supporters don’t give a flying fuck about COVID or their own health. Dear Leader is speaking and they will avoid Satan himself to go see him! But here’s where it gets creepy and weird.

Donald Trump has claimed he is immune to coronavirus and told a rally it makes him feel ‘so powerful’ he would jump into the crowd and give supporters a ‘big fat kiss’. The US president called the pandemic a ‘lovefest’ and threw face masks into the crowd of hundreds at the Orlando Sanford International Airport, Florida, on Monday night. Trump told the predominantly mask-less audience: ‘One thing with me, the nice part: I went through it, now they say I’m immune. ‘I feel so powerful, I’ll walk into that audience. I’ll walk in there, I’ll kiss everyone in that audience. I’ll kiss the guys and the beautiful women, everyone, I’ll just give you a big fat kiss.’

Speaking at his first rally since falling ill, the 74-year-old president defended his handling of the pandemic – which has so far killed 215,000 Americans – in a bid to revive his campaign with just weeks to go until Election Day. Although he was admitted to hospital with the virus only a week ago, Trump claimed to the audience the pandemic was almost a thing of the past. He said: ‘Under my leadership, we’re delivering a safe vaccine and a rapid recovery like no one can even believe. ‘If you look at our upward path, no country in the world has recovered the way we have recovered.’

Read more: https://metro.co.uk/2020/10/13/trump-tells-fans-hell-give-them-big-fat-kiss-after-covid-infection-at-packed-rally-13412428/?ito=cbshare

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!! EW! EW! EW! EW! EW! EW! EW! Wait a minute… EW. Why the flying fuck does he always make every thing so creepy and weird? Because he is a creepy weirdo and it’s just totally disgusting. OK now that I have got that off my chest, you know what the GOP really thinks of us and Joe Biden? Well let’s just say that they’ve gone full asshole and now all rules are off the table.

Ronna McDaniel seethed at the Commission for Presidential Debates for their decision to adopt a virtual format for their second event of the 2020 election.

The GOP chairwoman remains in quarantine after testing positive for Covid-19, which seems to have originated from the White House’s apparent super-spreader event that left President Donald Trump and many others infected. Nonetheless, McDaniel gave an interview to Fox News’ Sandra Smith on Thursday, where the focus was on Trump’s refusal to participate in a virtual debate.

McDaniel began by slamming the commission and saying it was “filled with Republicans who have been very critical of this president, and a large group of Democrats.” After that, she insinuated that the commission is in Joe Biden’s pocket, claiming “47 years of Joe Biden being in D.C. has bought him a lot of favors across the aisle.”

“I hope no future nominee of our party works with this commission,” McDaniel said. “They are a total joke and they are hurting our democracy and impacting this election.”

[font size="8"]And Now This:

Folks last week we lost one of the greats of all time – Eddie Van Halen. And I know that live music is off the table right now so I am paying tribute to him through live music. Really anyone who knows the Sunset Strip scene has a Van Halen story or two. Me I’ve always liked his song “Right Now” from his 1991 album “For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge” and it’s a protest song even though it at one point was used for a Pepsi product that no longer exists. So here it is – Van Halen performing “Right Now”.

Folks, before we get out of here, a programming note. Next week is our last new regular Top 10 before the election. 10/28 will be a Viewer’s Choice All Time Best Of (with maybe a new entry or two), and 11/4 will go dark. Maybe we will do a Top 10 Mini depending on how I feel or how things are going. We will be back in full on 11/11 once the dust has been settled – and hopefully in a much better mood than we have been the last 4 years! Next week, we will have our final thoughts going into the election in “Road To The White House”.

See you next week!


Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded At: Flappers Comedy Club, Burbank, CA
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