General Discussion

Ms. Toad

(38,232 posts)

57. I don't believe she did.

Mon May 27, 2013, 10:16 AM

May 2013

Senior-freshman relationships are very common. You put kids in the same school and relationships of all sorts, including romantic, are going to occur. Some of those are deemed consensual by virtue of the senior being 17, and some are deemed predatory by virtue of the senior being 18. But the fact that one child has passed some magic age doesn't change the reality of the dynamic of those relationships from consensual to predatory.

The reality of the relationship is what concerns me, and that reality among schoolmates doesn't depend on whether one has crossed an arbitrary age barrier.

The reality of teenagers is that you can't watch them 24/7 and if they are intent on misbehaving they can find ways to do so. I just don't think criminalizing the behavior of one of two kids in a relationship is an appropriate response to this particular misbehavior.

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Kaitlyn Hunt's mother under attack by bloggers who say 'Free Kate' is all lies [View all] shawn703 May 2013 OP

The whole thing stinks. If there is smoke then there is fire. I still think it has southernyankeebelle May 2013 #1

What smoke? shawn703 May 2013 #16

Wild eyed accusations from the freekate camp? I think you have it backwards. nt pnwmom May 2013 #27

Backwards? shawn703 May 2013 #42

I don't know who to believe. I am so glad its clear to you. southernyankeebelle May 2013 #45

Well usually it's harder to believe shawn703 May 2013 #48

Well I really am not following it to closely. I just hope the girl doesn't go to jail and they southernyankeebelle May 2013 #49

The "3 year age gap" & other false talking points originated w/Kate's mother alp227 May 2013 #154

Post removed Post removed May 2013 #2

I'm straight and detest the double standard. I think the arthritisR_US May 2013 #4

I don't think so. They probably wouldn't have warned the older one more than once first.... Honeycombe8 May 2013 #7

Well that's just silly shawn703 May 2013 #8

Where is the double standard? LisaL May 2013 #9

Because the 18 yr old was female, we will never know but I arthritisR_US May 2013 #13

if you're referring to Jerry Seinfeld his minor was over the age of consent magical thyme May 2013 #17

Conor Kennedy was 17 shawn703 May 2013 #18

My feeling is that the harm being done to the arthritisR_US May 2013 #19

Depends how you look at it shawn703 May 2013 #20

I agree but people are to blind to see it Drale May 2013 #176

I remember sneaking out as a teenager too so arthritisR_US May 2013 #184

You must not listen to Stern. MrSlayer May 2013 #102

I can honestly say I have never listened to him. arthritisR_US May 2013 #157

This I remember. Wasn't it on most shows being discussed? vaberella May 2013 #182

"You straights"? No shit? 11 Bravo May 2013 #6

Haha yeah shawn703 May 2013 #10

"You straights"? C'mon. nolabear May 2013 #11

This message was self-deleted by its author Iggo May 2013 #12

Deleting as the post referring to was hidden The Straight Story May 2013 #14

When sex between two kids is referred to as "lewd & lascivious", I stop reading & dismiss pacalo May 2013 #3

The law is the law. The 18 year old was asked more than once to leave the child alone.... Honeycombe8 May 2013 #5

I'm not about to defend the sneaking out at night; it's a parent's nightmare for the reasons pacalo May 2013 #15

Are you listening to yourself? stupart74 May 2013 #38

So was Romeo. jeff47 May 2013 #90

And look how well it ended for both of them. LisaL May 2013 #95

Yeah, it's terrible that their scheme to flee their stupid parents failed. jeff47 May 2013 #98

I think it's about time to state the obvious. Romeo and Juliet are not actually people. LisaL May 2013 #104

I think it's about time you realize your revulsion at this case jeff47 May 2013 #111

How would her life be destroyed by a plea deal that included no jail time and no sex offender LisaL May 2013 #115

It's a felony conviction. jeff47 May 2013 #118

If you can't do the time, then don't do the crime. LisaL May 2013 #119

The entire point is this should not be a crime. jeff47 May 2013 #121

Go read the damn play. Donald Ian Rankin May 2013 #142

And her screeching Dorian Gray May 2013 #149

These are a couple girls, 3 and a half years apart, on the same team. pnwmom May 2013 #28

What? LisaL May 2013 #62

In this situation. In general, I think the age of 21 for full adulthood pnwmom May 2013 #112

Then by your logic, a 20-year-old hooking up with a 14-year-old would be okay? NaturalHigh May 2013 #130

No, a six year age difference is too much. pnwmom May 2013 #132

Except it wasn't two kids. Mr. X May 2013 #26

She's a kid. n/t pacalo May 2013 #29

Yes Mr. X May 2013 #32

One does one stop being a kid nowdays? LisaL May 2013 #63

There's multiple measurements. jeff47 May 2013 #92

Which is funny, because here is the definition of that davidpdx May 2013 #185

The laws weren't as insane when I went to high school. pacalo May 2013 #187

Agreed davidpdx May 2013 #188

And of course people indignantly deny that there's any *hint* of bias at work. nomorenomore08 May 2013 #21

except not really roughrider101 May 2013 #22

No actual stats, but I can think of worse cases than that where nothing ever happened to the guy. nomorenomore08 May 2013 #23

Do you know roughrider101 May 2013 #24

Admittedly, no. nomorenomore08 May 2013 #25

Do the laws Mr. X May 2013 #30

drug laws don't have penalties based on race dsc May 2013 #81

Yes and no Mr. X May 2013 #120

But penalties for crack are more severe than for powder cocaine KamaAina May 2013 #173

And? Mr. X May 2013 #183

So what you are saying is roughrider101 May 2013 #31

No, I'm putting my own interpretation to a somewhat ambiguous situation. nomorenomore08 May 2013 #34

a somewhat ambiguous situation? roughrider101 May 2013 #99

If you trust the word of Christian fundamentalists who think Kaitlyn "made their daughter gay" nomorenomore08 May 2013 #135

Who are Christian fundamentalists? roughrider101 May 2013 #138

Maybe we're both seeing what we want to see. That's very possible. nomorenomore08 May 2013 #139

And like many red-state Democrats shawn703 May 2013 #140

It's not likely roughrider101 May 2013 #141

Yes. Ms. Toad May 2013 #33

at my high school, one of the girls in my class was having a relationship with a teacher, HiPointDem May 2013 #35

That's factually incorrect... Chan790 May 2013 #61

Actually, the plea deal offered included no jail time. NaturalHigh May 2013 #65

can you provide a link? because almost every article I've seen magical thyme May 2013 #110

The net was designed to catch 18 year old boys. lumberjack_jeff May 2013 #66

+1 JVS May 2013 #165

This message was self-deleted by its author davidn3600 May 2013 #36

FYI...one blogger leading this charge about all this being a lie is a known far-right winger davidn3600 May 2013 #37

So here's an easy one then shawn703 May 2013 #41

Yeah, he got caught red-handed on that one. NaturalHigh May 2013 #103

I'm not sure it is that easy. CincyDem May 2013 #126

Very true, Dave, very true. AverageJoe90 May 2013 #164

So what is your explanation shawn703 May 2013 #166

Not only bloggers, but many members of DU have as well davidpdx May 2013 #39

18 and 14 is not child molestation...especially when it was just turned 18 and almost 15. alphafemale May 2013 #40

It's not like Kate wasn't warned shawn703 May 2013 #43

According to the Smiths RockaFowler May 2013 #44

According to the younger girl's family... NaturalHigh May 2013 #46

Never mind the fact that that is the only station--the only reporter even, that they will talk ScreamingMeemie May 2013 #68

WTF should they talk to the press at all, unless they want to? LisaL May 2013 #75

How well did you listen to your parents when they told you to stay away from someone? we can do it May 2013 #159

I've never been in a position shawn703 May 2013 #163

She didn't "just" turn 18. LisaL May 2013 #64

When my daughter was 14... NaturalHigh May 2013 #47

How about parenting your child instead. Ms. Toad May 2013 #50

You obviously have no clue on teenagers. itsrobert May 2013 #51

Ms. Hunt is not a predator. Ms. Toad May 2013 #54

I'm not so sure that she's not a predator. NaturalHigh May 2013 #67

If you were asked to describe your teenage child's girlfriend or boyfriend Ms. Toad May 2013 #70

"A bit scrambled" is one thing... NaturalHigh May 2013 #73

It is not that I am sympathetic to Ms Hunt - Ms. Toad May 2013 #79

I think you won't find the link you're looking for shawn703 May 2013 #89

Several people on DU made the very specific assertion Ms. Toad May 2013 #94

Couldn't the absence of such threads shawn703 May 2013 #122

Actually, I am pretty sure it is quite rare Ms. Toad May 2013 #156

This is about sex not dating DevilMayhem666 May 2013 #186

Welcome to DU and indeed, that it is, about sex, not "dating". uppityperson May 2013 #189

Always someone else's fault, right? davidn3600 May 2013 #55

Quick! Call Chris Hansen! backscatter712 May 2013 #83

And if it comes to it shawn703 May 2013 #52

Nothing I've seen said they did anything Ms. Toad May 2013 #59

I don't see any evidence that parents of a 14 year old didn't try to control their child. LisaL May 2013 #60

Nothing you've seen shawn703 May 2013 #69

All I can go by is what they have said publicly. Ms. Toad May 2013 #71

So would you be happier shawn703 May 2013 #72

"I don't see why they should be explaining to anyone..." NaturalHigh May 2013 #78

And they should be fucking smeared for their religious bigotry. backscatter712 May 2013 #88

According to whom? NaturalHigh May 2013 #91

I've seen this stated again and again, kiva May 2013 #150

The parents have already made statements. Ms. Toad May 2013 #80

It's their child, not yours. These people are following the law. They are fully within their rights LisaL May 2013 #96

I don't disagree with you. NaturalHigh May 2013 #53

I don't believe she did. Ms. Toad May 2013 #57

A 7th grade classmate of mine dated a Senior toward the end of the term BuelahWitch May 2013 #125

The problem is Kate picked up the 14 year old at night without the girls parents knowledge dkf May 2013 #152

right. you know so much about how the poster parents? the fuck you do. cali May 2013 #56

"your" Ms. Toad May 2013 #58

the behavior of the older child ? roughrider101 May 2013 #137

When they are in high school, Ms. Toad May 2013 #155

No...they arent. roughrider101 May 2013 #167

I'm not talking about legal interactions - Ms. Toad May 2013 #172

You're making the point wrong in the beginning roughrider101 May 2013 #174

No you're accepting that the law, as it is, is how it should be. Ms. Toad May 2013 #175

So are all laws. You dont want subjective laws do you? roughrider101 May 2013 #177

You really think a relationship between a senior and a freshman is unusual? jeff47 May 2013 #76

Probably not as unusual as they should be. NaturalHigh May 2013 #77

Oh please. jeff47 May 2013 #85

They are? roughrider101 May 2013 #101

You do realize the plural of "anecdote" is not "data", right? jeff47 May 2013 #107

Because the puritans? roughrider101 May 2013 #131

...and this thread... Iggo May 2013 #74

Oh, didn't you know, Kaitlyn's a sexual predator! backscatter712 May 2013 #82

Now there's a charming euphemism for "an adult having sex with a child". Donald Ian Rankin May 2013 #84

Fucking stupid is what this case is. backscatter712 May 2013 #86

so what? roughrider101 May 2013 #105

Good post. NaturalHigh May 2013 #108

Agreed. "Peer group" makes no sense. richmwill May 2013 #124

What denomination are the Smiths? shawn703 May 2013 #143

Bullshit. jeff47 May 2013 #87

I'm afraid I think you're just making stuff up. Donald Ian Rankin May 2013 #93

I'm afraid I think you're making stuff up. jeff47 May 2013 #97

This would not be a crime in the majority of states??? NaturalHigh May 2013 #100

I'm not. jeff47 May 2013 #106

What vast majority of states? And how many years difference are we talking about in this LisaL May 2013 #113

Usually, the age difference is about 4 years. jeff47 May 2013 #116

Very true. This is Florida, the most brain-damaged state in the union. backscatter712 May 2013 #117

Romeo and Juliet laws shawn703 May 2013 #128

Would not be a crime in most countries is a better way to put it davidn3600 May 2013 #109

Considering a lot of people here are arguing that 18 year old aren't mature, LisaL May 2013 #114

Just because you're not mature, doesn't mean you won't have sex jeff47 May 2013 #123

60% of 18 year olds have sex with 14 year olds? shawn703 May 2013 #129

You should pay attention to a thread before replying. jeff47 May 2013 #144

That's not how I interpreted the posts leading up to yours shawn703 May 2013 #146

Well, apparently you need some help with reading comprehension then. jeff47 May 2013 #148

If you haven't seen the "they're both just kids" argument shawn703 May 2013 #151

The "they're both just kids" is not about 18-year olds being immature. jeff47 May 2013 #179

Frankly, I don't care if people know what it is like to be 18 or not. AnalystInParadise May 2013 #162

What would you respond if I said roughrider101 May 2013 #181

What? roughrider101 May 2013 #170

When did this happen? roughrider101 May 2013 #180

Where did you pull that stat from? roughrider101 May 2013 #133

Seriously? jeff47 May 2013 #145

Where in the second paragraph? roughrider101 May 2013 #171

You have to actually follow the discussion you are trying to participate in. jeff47 May 2013 #178

Based on this roughrider101 May 2013 #134

Seriously? 45 states can handle different thresholds jeff47 May 2013 #147

This message was self-deleted by its author alp227 May 2013 #160

Read the entire 2 sentences before replying. jeff47 May 2013 #161

Are you responding to me? roughrider101 May 2013 #168

They were both in HIGH SCHOOL Matariki May 2013 #127

High school seniors dont get arrested for having relationships with freshmen roughrider101 May 2013 #136

18 year old having sex with a 14 child is wrong. Period. DMacTX May 2013 #153

I believe there are degrees of wrong cali May 2013 #169

Ugh, social media gives people ways to meddle in other people's business. Initech May 2013 #158