I'm from the south.

[stlsaxman]

353. Dude- you're all over the place....

I just spent the last half hour reading this thread trying to get a sense of your "dilemma" and in each post/reply there are 5 new points. In regards to your "What If..."- this is how "it could have happened" to me-

My "Silver Platter" of which I was unaware until 15 years ago (the reason will become apparent as you read on):

I was born to Marxist Catholics who met on the editorial board of Dorothy Day's "The Catholic Worker" They had a sense of duty to fellow human beings, especially the poor, as a way to serve God. My father tried 3 times to enlist in the Navy to fight fascism (another ism) and The Nazi's in WWII but was refused each time because his work on the Manhattan Project made him too important in the war effort. He later founded the chemistry department at Saint Louis University and threatened the Jesuits with his resignation when they refused to give one of his first doctoral students his PhD because he was black. He also appeared before the HUAC in defense of his boss on The Project. My parents welcomed with open arms the first Jewish family into our little cul du sac when all the other residence shunned them.... I could go on. But-

My father died when I was two years old. He had berylliosus, a fatal disease which crystallizes the lungs and rots the bone marrow over a period of a decade or so. My mother, because of the sensitive nature of his work, rarely spoke to us of him (an issue I've long since forgiven her). He gave his life for his country, though never joining the military his work directly helped shorten the war and saved thousands of American and allied soldiers lives.

From my birth to the age of 39, because his life's work was classified, I assumed George Washington Schaeffer, Jr. was a staunch Catholic (which he was in many ways) Anti-choice, Anti-Gay, Anti-whatever Conservative who would have voted for Nixon and Reagan, etc (a quick aside: on only one occasion did my mother give a clue- when we were watching the RNC and Nixon was being nominated she said "George always said if that man was ever elected this nation would be in trouble!&quot . As far as I knew, my father was the archetypal image of "The Man" that my generation were rebelling against in the late '60's. I only found out otherwise when my siblings and I did some research to see if we qualified for a "Weapons Workers Compensation Act" signed by Bill Clinton. We had to file FOIA papers and go to The National Archives in D.C. and all that shit- it was pretty cool!

So- THIS is my "Silver Platter". I was WRONG about my legacy until I was 40 years old. I was a "Liberal by birth" as you say, without even knowing it- Hell- I just grew up wanting to do what's right (even without a father-figure in my life for guidance). Turns out- I AM my fathers son.

The grave I never visited 'til I was 40.



The man I never knew 'til I was 40.