I thought it would get better by now. Husband died 2-6 and I still can't sleep and must force

[pat_k]

82. When my partner died back in 2011...

... I was a basket case.

We were both IT consultants and had a little dog walking side gig to force ourselves to get away from the computer.

After Dusty's death, I was too much of a mess for consulting, so I turned the dog walking into a full-time business. I think it saved my life.

I didn't have the wherewithal to get out and walk for myself, but knowing my doggy clients needed me got me out the door.

I cried and screamed in my car on my way to each visit, put on my sunglasses to hide my red eyes to walk a pup, rinse and repeat for at least 8 walks a day. Played lots of music to grieve by. Adele's someone like you, pink Floyd's wish you were here, Dobie Grey's drift away (Dusty was a musician and used to cover that song) stand out.

Slowly the episodes of crying lessened, but even more than 10 years later, the pain strikes.

BTW, The lost love of my life was Senator here on DU.

In Memoriam
DU's "Senator" Died June 8, 2011
https://www.democraticunderground.com/1002750566