Reply #161: you remind me of myself [View All]

[datasuspect]

you sound like a smart, self-motivated person.

i felt the same way when i was 23 years old. went and talked to a recruiter. they have a way of using your enthusiasm and dreams against you by latching on to your energy and basically telling you what you want to hear. my example: i was really proficient in languages and was a philosophy major. i expressed this to the recruiter and took the asvab and was told that i qualified for cryptography/intelligence/high security clearance shit which would involve a more detailed inspection of my personal history and records.

was he bullshitting me? maybe, maybe not, but it appealed to my ego. he had me about 90% hooked and pretty much kept tabs on me for a week: we would run together; go to the gym together; taking me to get my first drivers license; hanging out at the recruiter's office; going to visit national guard elements at their respective bases to get an idea of "military life"; etc.

but i backed out at the very last minute the day before i was to be processed. some well-intentioned people who i respected intellectually told me it probably wouldn't work out the way i thought it would. they knew me well enough - knew how independent minded i was.

i was way too young at the time and wanted a change of scenery (looking back now, that's all it was). i was bored, although at the time i tried melodramatically mindfucking myself into ascribing all kinds of "noble" motives to the idea of joining the military.

my best friend joined the marine corps and he told me that the primary purpose of the armed forces is to train people to kill. that's it. eveything else is secondary. you spend a lot of time waiting around and getting drunk while being government property. and in my conservations with other vets, that was the most compelling information they told me: that you spend lots of time waiting. that there is no tolerance for individuality - WHATSOEVER. you sound like an intellectual person, why would you want to plunge yourself into a gung-ho world like that?

THERE ARE SO MANY, MANY OTHER WAYS YOU CAN TEST YOUR METTLE. maybe you haven't found your niche yet, but that can be ameliorated by stepping out of your middle class world for a year or two.

move into a ghetto

get a teaching certificate - teach in a poor school district: this wipes out student loans.

just don't confuse a mid-20s existential crisis with a need to sign your life away to the government.

i don't know you. i still hope you don't join.