Reply #7: I was an only child and I hated it! [View All]

[liberalhistorian]

I still do. And I don't think it helps much as an adult in the real world, either, because you get used to not having to learn to share and compromise, and to getting your own of everything.

And I'm not sure if it's good training for marriage, either. I'm 38 and never married (although I do have a 12-year-old son, so I suppose you could say I have a little boy to take care of after all, lol!), and I think that's one of the major reasons why. As an only child, you get used to spending hours alone every day, (as well as pretty much doing what you want when you want without having to take a sibling's schedule into account) and you get to where you actually enjoy it and need it. That doesn't go over very well in a marriage, especially if you're married to someone from a larger family.

I did live with someone for a couple of years during and right after college, in my mid-20's, and it was a disaster. He couldn't understand why I needed and wanted so much time alone, why I'd forsake the fucking housework and laundry (I told him I wasn't his mother, if he wanted his laundry done and everything clean all the time, he could get a maid, and a cook, too, while he was at it!) to read a book or magazine or the paper, or things like that, had to know where I was going and what I was doing. I couldn't just go out with a friend for dinner or anything like that, I had to let him know I was going to be late so he wouldn't worry, etc. In short, my time wasn't my own. And I've seen a lot of marriages up close, enough to know that you give up a lot when you get married, mainly your freedom and your personal time alone, and I'm not sure I want to do that.

Of course, everyone just says I haven't met the right person, because, when you're with the right person, you don't mind all that stuff and you actually want to share things with them and wake up with them and go to sleep with them, etc. That's probably true!