Prank Call to Christian Lender [View All]

[ChoralScholar]

from Zug.com.

http://www.zug.com/gab/index.cgi?func=view_thread&sort=active&head=1&thread_id=68498

Of the 40,000 spam emails I receive each week, the ones that make me the most angry are the ones advertising "Christian Lenders," because you know they're not Christians. It's an unethical marketing ploy to prey upon uneducated Middle Americans who don't realize that Jews actually offer the best interest rates.

Like Satan, I decided to test their faith. I made the following prank call to one of these "Christian" lenders (which turned out to be Citibank), to see if I could take out a home equity loan against my mortgage.

CHRISTIAN LENDER: Thank you for calling Citibank, this is Rob. How can I help you?

JOHN HARGRAVE: Hi, my wife and I are looking to take out a home equity loan. We're both Christians.

CL: Okay. Can I have your name, sir?

JH: John Hargrave. Hey, you know what? Before we begin, would you mind if we pray?

CL: Sure.

JH: Dear Heavenly Father: I just want to thank you, Lord, for your goodness and mercy. Jesus, I pray that you will annoint our lips, and speak to our hearts, as Rob and I discuss this, our home equity loan. Amen.

CL: All righty.

JH: Now it's your turn.

CL: My turn to pray.

JH: Yes.

CL: Okay. I just ... er ... ... so, you want to establish a home equity loan?

JH: That wasn't really much of a prayer.

CL: I'm sorry, sir.

JH: Were you just praying on the inside?

CL: Yes I was, sir. Is that OK?

JH: It didn't feel very sincere. Are you sure you guys are Christian lenders?

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Finish up at:
http://www.zug.com/gab/index.cgi?func=view_thread&sort=active&head=1&thread_id=68498