Third Debate Affirms First Two: Keyes Wins Again (not The Onion) [View All]

[ozymandius]

CHICAGO, OCTOBER 26) -- Keyes 2004 campaign manager Bill Pascoe, reacting to Alan Keyes' clear win in tonight's second televised debate against Barack Obama, released the following statement:

"The third and final debate is over, and the score is clear: it's three straight wins for Alan Keyes and the voters of Illinois.

"Once again, Alan demonstrated that he is clearly in tune with the voters of Illinois, while Barack Obama is outside the mainstream: on issue after issue -- whether it was winning the war on terror, deciding how best to advance educational reforms to improve the schooling of our children, seeking and achieving energy independence, defending traditional marriage, or working to get better trade deals for our workers and farmers -- Alan showed his stuff, and the voters of Illinois are the better off for it.

http://www.keyes2004.com/news/041026press.php

I was about to say - "You just can't make this stuff up." But then, somebody did.