Reply #20: I have a few suggestions [View All]

[Happyhippychick]

First of all, hugs to you, you are a wonderful teacher.

Boundaries: he needs them but I think with this child it is not enough to simply say "you can only ask me about grades once per day" (although I think it's a great suggestion!). He sounds like he has aspberger's and giving him a boundary is not enough, he needs a replacement behavior. I would say to him, "when you see me in the hall you can ask me how my day is" or "you can tell me how your day is" or "you can say "hi"". I agree that it sounds like aspberger's and he will need to have a lot of social counseling in order to learn how to properly relate to people.

You have done a lot for this child, maybe too much. If it is a drain on you then it is too much! Remember that the way you are experiencing him is the way everybody is experiencing him and it sounds like he doesn't have enough strategies for learning how to navigate social relationships. He is asking questions inappropriately not necessarily because he wants attention but because he doesn't "get" that it's inappropriate.

His shoulders may be slumped because aspie kids have low muscle tone, it's not necessarily because he is depressed although it certainly could be. Can you talk to the parents directly about him or just the school counselor?

Good luck to you, you have done wonderful things for this child but you can only do so much. He needs to be in a peer group with other kids who have similar issues so that he can learn appropriate social skills.