Valentine's Day comes to Gull Bay [View All]

[Patsy Stone]

The snow drifts blanketed the lodge at Gull Bay



keeping all the EDVs in their large game room with its crackling fire, playing pool and betting on the Olympics.

After an slight altercation wherein Bunny and Sharon argued ferociously for five minutes about which of the Chinese pairs skaters needed to have their teeth fixed first, the afternoon wore on in a lazy Sunday kinda way, even though it was Tuesday.

About 5 p.m., a knock at the door both startled and annoyed them. Who was at the door? How did they get through the snow? Who lost the coin toss and had to get up and answer the door? (BTW, congrats to DG who won the bet on the toss!)

Berry, getting up off a well-placed bear, rose to see who disturbed their peaceful repose. "Hey, no fair, Olney! I called, 'Keith!' and it was heads!"

"Berry, there were only two calls: heads or tails. Keith wasn't a choice," replied Olney.

"Blasphemer!", exclaimed Berry with a smile. "Keith is ALWAYS my choice!" :loveya::loveya::loveya:

Making her way through the rest of the lodge and noticing Rev staring wistfully at a picture of a bar, Berry opened to the door to reveal a man of about 20 years old. Whipping out his laminated ID card, he identified himself as a Countdown "staffer". She gave him the once over, twice, and decided from his shoes that he was clearly an intern.

Looking up he asked her innocently, "Um, h-h-hello. Is this the lodge at Gull Bay? Where the Bay Airs and the EDVs frolic



by Bleever Pond?"



Berry, suddenly realizing that this man could TAKE HER TO KEITH, turned on the charm. "It sure is, honey! How can I help you? Where is Keith? Did he send you?"

"Well, yes," he answered shyly. "Yes, he--"

Before he could finish the sentence, Berry began to swoon.



Rev, looking over the top of the Hot Toddy (more Toddy than hot) she was swigging so demurely, saw what was happening. With her cat-like reflexes (which by now, with months of practice, were as finely-tuned as a concert Steinway), she didn't spill a drop as she slid a Bay Air under Berry, perfectly placed, breaking her fall.

"Is she gonna be okay?" he asked.

"Oh, sure," Rev said. "Happens ten times a day. We keep extra Bay Airs around just for that, but she's worth it. Now, you said Keith sent you? Why?"

"Well, he regrets he can't join you in person on Valentine's Day, but he thought you might like some lovely MSNBC swag and these DVDs of Oddball's Greatest Moments and the Countdown Apology Hall of Fame," the intern said proudly.

Upon hearing the words "Hall of Fame" Berry awoke like she'd just heard Cheney's got a gun. "What? Hall of Fame RERUNS?!? Why didn't he just mail it in??"

At this moment a snowmobile came roaring up the hill. From a distance, the red spot grew larger and larger and the sound grew louder and louder. All the EDVs from the game room, the pool game now over with ralps counting the winnings and Patsy, a bad pool player at best, glad to have almost broken even, joined Berry and Rev in the great room, and stared at the staff-boy.

"Who's this kid?" Bunny asked?

"Countdown staffer. Keith sent him with his regrets and this load of MSNBC shite and a few Oddball and Hall of Fame DVDs," Rev told the rest.

They weren't buying it.



They could barely begin to form the next question before their thoughts were drowned out by the snowmobile now at the door. The driver, a vision in black leather, stepped off the machine and came up the steps.

Crispi took off her helmet and gloves, revealing the bracelet of pink cuffs on her left hand


"Who's this guy?" she asked.

"An MSNBC intern!" They answered in unison. Greylyn quickly filled her in on the story as bettyellen and seito grabbed the provisions Crispi had hunted and gathered.

"Keith not coming? That's a load of BS! Not only is he coming, but Botany's bringing him up and there's a special surprise too. Did you think he wouldn't show up? Have you no faith? The Dems are not dead and there's no way Keith wouldn't come by," she scoffed. "I just hope he's not too stripey," she thought quietly.

Provisions in, and having moved aside a few Bay Airs on the way, the EDVs went back into the lodge and pulled the intern in behind them.

"Okay, spill, kiddo! Who sent you here because we know it's not Keith!" bettyellen asked in her best "why-I-oughta" voice.

"Truth?" he asked.

"Truth!" she said.

"It's Rita, she hates you. She wanted you to have a terrible Valentine's Day. She would have come to gloat herself, but she had to take another week in Aruba to find Natalee. You know, I feel much better. I never liked her myself, and I've enjoyed the KOEB since the NSA turned me on to it. I didn't want to do this, but I felt I was just doing my job."

"Okay, Ollie," said crispi. "I know the perfect place for you." Whipping out her cuffs, she took him out to the shed by the birdhouse. No real amenities, and the sheets were a blend, but it would be fine while they figured out what to do with him.

When they got out there, there was standing room only. The place was packed with Nordic skiers and wayward hunters. He found a small space and sat.

Back at the lodge, Crispi returned to find the EDVs laughing and waiting for their Valentine's surprise. The bells began softly in the distance and steadily came closer until the whinnies and hard breathing of the horses approached the porch.



The door flew open. In stepped Botany, glad to be in the warmth. Next in was KO, waving and beginning to pass around the gifts and champagne.

Finally, Botany walked over to the Rev and whispered, "Did I ever tell you you are my Fav EDV?"

As he finished, in walked the one thing missing and the Rev knew immediately who that was:






Happy Valentine's Day everybody!