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Initech's Journal
Initech's Journal
October 31, 2014

Dumb Criminals: Florida Man (Obviously) Arrested Wearing "Go Directly To Jail" Shirt

Micah David Dailey, 20, of Cape Coral, Florida was arrested on October 28 for marijuana and drug equipment possession. But Dailey is getting attention for his pretty ironic mugshot photo.

In his booking image, Dailey is seen wearing a T-shirt that has the phrase "Go Directly to Jail" from the popular Parker Brothers board game Monopoly. If a Monopoly player landed on a Chance space during the game, there is a possibility that they could draw a card instructing them to go to jail immediately.

The phrase seen on that card, "Do not pass Go, do not collect $200" has been commonly used in pop culture, becoming a term for a situation with only one irreversible, often highly negative outcome, like a child getting grounded by their parents, or a student being sentenced to detention.


October 29, 2014

Dumb Criminals: Woman Twice Arrested For DUI In Same Night Was Wearing Zombie Makeup

Gates, NY (WROC)- Police say a Rochester woman was arrested for two DWI's within three hours early Saturday morning.

Gates Police stopped 26-year-old Catherine Butler twice on Buffalo Road. She had been celebrating at a Halloween party.

Butler was first arrested around 2 a.m. for operating without headlights and a DWI. She was then released to a friend. Less than three hours later, police say she was caught swerving on Buffalo Road. That's when Butler was arrested for a second DWI.

Butler has been in trouble with the law before. Gates Police Chief, James VanBrederode, says she has been arrested for drunk driving four times in Monroe County. He arrested her for drunk driving back in 2006.


For the "useless without pics" crowd:

The zombie apocalypse has started!!! Run!!!
October 29, 2014

Dumb Criminals: Tennessee Man Arrested For Pot Tells Cops He's Denzel Washington

MURFREESBORO – A 21-year-old man was arrested after he told police he was Denzel Washington after marijuana was found at an apartment he was at late Monday night.

Police were responding to a noise complaint to Colony House Apartments on Huntington Drive when they found five people in an apartment that had a strong odor of marijuana inside, according to a Murfreesboro Police Department arrest report.

When an officer tried to speak with all of the people inside the apartment, he said he heard several people moving above him and saw a paper target with holes in it, the report said.


October 28, 2014

Dumb Criminals: South Carolina Teenager Caught Stealing Penis Cream, Throat Desesitizer

This South Carolina teen may have had Shades of Grey on her mind before she was busted stealing an assortment of sex toys from a Spencer’s in Spartanburg Tuesday, police said.

Karla Farmer allegedly pinched Rock Hard erection cream and Deep Throat desensitizing spray from Spencer's "love unit" department at the WestGate mall. The 18-year-old then returned to the store and reportedly stole some handcuffs.

But mall security caught up with her, and she was detained, reports The Smoking Gun.

Cops were called and they also found two pairs of Victoria's Secret underwear stashed in her bag. It's alleged that she nabbed them from the lingerie store, also located inside the mall.


October 28, 2014

Dumb Criminals: California Teeanger Caught With Guns, 500 Pairs Of Women's Underwear

PETALUMA (CBS SF) — Police arrested a man after finding nearly 500 pairs of women’s underwear in his bedroom during a burglary investigation in Petaluma Tuesday afternoon.

Benjamin Hawkins, 18, allegedly entered a residence on Marilyn Circle at 3:30 p.m. and stole two firearms, one which was converted into a sawed-off shotgun, according to the Petaluma Police Department.

After officers obtained consent to search the Hawkin’s bedroom, police found women’s jewelry and about 500 pairs of women’s underwear.


October 24, 2014

Leading Swiss Grocery Chain Apologizes For Hitler And Mussolini Coffee Creamers

GENEVA (AP) — A leading Swiss supermarket chain is apologizing for what it calls an "unforgivable blunder": distributing mini-containers of coffee cream bearing portraits of Adolf Hitler and Benito Mussolini.

Migros, which also sells electronics and household goods, says it is immediately withdrawing boxes containing hundreds of the coffee cream containers and is breaking all ties with Karo-Versand, the small Swiss company that designed the collectible series of 55 different motifs — including likenesses of the German and Italian fascist dictators.


October 24, 2014

Dumb Criminals: New York Man Accidentally Texts Probation Officer If He Has Weed Or Not


An Albany man is going back to to prison, after he texted his probation officer while looking to buy marijuana.

Alvin Cross Junior plead guilty Monday to possession of cocaine and was sentenced to one year in prison.

He was also sentenced to serve another year for violating his probation.

Prosecutors said Cross' probation officer received a text from Cross asking, "You have some weed?"


October 24, 2014

Several Costumed Superhero Impersonators Brawl On Hollywood Blvd. Walk Of Fame

HOLLYWOOD (CBSLA.com) — They usually spend the day posing for pictures with tourists from around the world, but on Tuesday several costumed characters who work along the Hollywood Walk Of Fame started throwing punches.

The fight broke out in front of the TCL Chinese Theatre on Hollywood Boulevard while hundreds of tourists were on the busy sidewalks. A production company, FilmOn.com, was nearby filming another event, but trained its camera on the fight when it broke out around 5 p.m.

The video appears to show Mr Incredible and Batgirl struggling, with Chewbacca attempting to break up the tussle. After Batgirl scratches Mr. Incredible, Waldo and Freddy Krueger step in. They try to hold back Mr. Incredible, but he gets loose and chases Batgirl before punching and kicking her, and flipping her on the sidewalk. Bystanders then chase the characters off.

None of the characters on the street later Tuesday night saw the fight, but CBS2’s Suzanne Marques spoke with a Batman performer who said, much like comic books, when it comes to superheroes on the sidewalks, there are good guys and bad guys.


*Christian Bale Batman voice*

"You either die a hero or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain."
October 21, 2014

Dumb Criminals: Florida (Obviously) Man Caught Stealing Plumbing From Cracker Barrel

Police say they've flushed out a man accused of stealing the handles and pipes of toilets in parks and restaurant restrooms around a Florida city.

St. Petersburg police said Friday that they arrested a 28-year-old homeless man. He is accused of stealing the plumbing from Cracker Barrel, Burger King, Bob Evans and other restaurants. Police released a photo of a pile of metal toilet parts that they say Brian Rinda stole.

Police say Rinda caused about $1,000 in damage and traded the brass valve and piping at a county recycling center.


October 21, 2014

Dumb Criminals: Wanted Tennessee Car Theif Didn't Pick Good Enough Hiding Spot

MCMINN COUNTY, TN (WRCB) - A wanted man tried hiding from police, but it didn't work out so well. A McMinn County deputy found the suspect hiding in a dark closet eating dinner.

Timothy Black, 54, of Sweetwater was already wanted for stealing a car and shoplifting in Monroe County. When the deputy found him in someone else's closet, Black put his hands up -- fork in one hand, dinner in the other.

"Mr. Black was in a closet, evidently enjoying a bowl of salad," said McMinn County Sheriff Joe Guy.

It's not a typical way police find a wanted fugitive, he said. But that's how a deputy found the suspect at a home in the 250 block of County Road 298 in McMinn County, where "Welcome To This House" is brightly painted on the front deck.

Deputy Dillon Presswood got word Black was wanted on several warrants, and was hiding out in the house.

"Especially if someone is taking some action not to go to jail, that raises an officer's awareness a little bit," Guy said.


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