WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, American millennials reflected on how many things needed to be fixed in the wake of their parents, which they concluded were members of the "Most Selfish Generation" in American history. Millennials realized the Most Selfish Generation was giving them "a colossal mess to clean up" due to its refusal to pay for anything it uses, its conscious decision not to invest in any future projects other than military expenditures, and its embrace of social conflicts meant to distract Americans while the super-rich rob everyone else in broad daylight and exacerbate economic inequality.

Hathaway continued, "They just don't want to pay for anything, except perpetual foreign war. At some point you have to wonder what all those external wars are protecting. You know, other than a hollowed-out shell with massive war-related debts and a bunch of undertaxed super-rich oligarchs that watch the rest of America bicker over scraps from a shrinking economic pie."

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, a senior campaign staffer close to Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton confirmed a popular psychic from the late 1990s named "Miss Cleo" had warned Mrs. Clinton of a "horrible Berning in 2016." Clinton laughed at questions from the press about the private discussion she took part in with Miss Cleo, and stated she was "not very concerned about any psychic reading I allegedly received this morning."

Democratic presidential candidate Senator Bernie Sanders of Vermont responded to TNA's request for comment by stating he had "no affiliation whatsoever with Miss Cleo, and couldn't care less who Hillary Clinton talks to in her very limited private time away from the bankers who are her largest donors."

The Republican base is mainly composed of very low information voters, which would be bad enough if they were not also constantly being given misinformation about who they should hate, be afraid of, and on and on, by the right-wing echo chamber.

And while they are blaming everyone else for their problems, the rich laugh their asses off and become richer while the commoners fight over the scraps.