I'm done, too.

[Erich Bloodaxe BSN]

406. I am indeed listening as well.

And I also support you in speaking up. My support is not based on your 'tone'. In fact, my support is not based on you personally, at all, or any particular individual. My point is simply that you can more effectively message with certain changes to how you message. I'm not going to change how I feel about the greater sexism in society based upon your tone at all. Nor am I going to tell you that there won't be trolls who simply call you (or her, or whoever) a liar outright, no matter what your 'tone' is. There will. But there are also 'waffly' people, who can be turned one way or another by tone. How do I know? I am one. I didn't at first believe in 'white privilege', but thanks to people on Daily Kos who took the time to treat me with respect, despite my ignorance, who walked me through from the most basic concepts to more complex ones, I evolved into a better ally. Not a great one, but I keep trying. And that same lesson carries over across other fights. Some people are more open, some are less. And some will respond to what they see. If they see reason, they'll be open to being reasoned with.

Some. Not all. Like I said, some will always be hostile and trollish, and no change in 'tone' will change that. But it seems to me that larger societal change will come more quickly, the more of the 'waffly' people you can convince.

If you don't agree, you don't agree. And that's your choice, and I'm listening to you when you tell me why you feel I'm wrong.

And whether you feel I'm 'on your side' or 'pretending to be on your side' or 'not listening' has nothing to do with either your tone, or my continued feeling that patriarchy is harmful to both men and women. It may keep me from interacting as much with the subject on DU, but I try not to let negative individual interactions negatively impact my feelings about larger issues.