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Initech's Journal
Initech's Journal
June 4, 2018

This! So much this!


May 23, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-19: Too Many Exits Edition (SEASON FINALE!)

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-19: Too Many Exits Edition (SEASON FINALE!)

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! Hey websites please stop asking me to review your updated privacy policy because we both know that ain't happening! We are back everybody! And I cannot wait to unveil the exciting changes coming to the Top 10 in June. Which is only 3 short weeks away. Are there any runners in this audience? I’m not exactly what one would call a “runner”. You can tell. You know we always like to report on weird shit in the introduction and if you really want to see some crazy shit head to San Francisco on May 19th. There were 40,000 that showed up to San Fran so you’re bound to see some truly crazy shit. That was last Saturday and it was the site of the annual Bay To Breakers 12K ½ marathon. And the Bay To Breakers even t is different because there’s two options for running this race. The first is that you can run in costume – and there were a lot of interesting costumes. This is San Francisco we’re talking about here. You had everything from a group of people doing their best impression of Blue Man Tobias from Arrested Development to people dressing like Ruth Bader Ginsburg to promote her new documentary called “The Notorious RGB”, to people dressed like “Team Yanni vs Team Laurel” (don’t get me started on that BS), to of course lots of Star Wars costumes. The other option is that you can run the race – ass naked. Yes like Bart in the Simpsons Movie. But my personal favorite had to be the woman who went as both – and did her own self-censoring nudity:

Yeah so that happened! Got to love creative people out there. OK that’s enough of the intro – we got a lot of idiocy to get to. But first it was also the season finale for another show, and we have to show you a clip from Saturday Night Live’s brilliant opener from Saturday:

God fucking damn it. Two months after Parkland, have we learned nothing? Because another mass shooting happened – this time in Texas. In the number slot this week of course we’re going to dedicate it to Gun Nut Apologists (1) and the resulting “same shit, different day” scenario that keeps coming up over and over. In the second slot this week is Dan Patrick (2). Yes, the Lt. Governor of Texas has quite literally shot his mouth off and we will tell you about the resulting stupidity. Taking the third slot we’re going to introduce you to a New York attorney named Aaron Schlossberg (3) who went full MAGA Trump on a group of Latino protestors in NYC. Taking the 4th slot is of course Donald Trump (4). So Trump made some shocking and horrifying comments about immigrants and was specifically referring to the violent South American gang MS-13, or was he? In slot #5 is a new installment of our weekly investigative piece “Top 10 Investigates” and this time we’re going to shock you with some (not at all surprising) statistics about America's undying love of the firearm. At number 6 is our weekly sermon of all things holy, Holy Shit, and this week our resident pastor is going to show you some of the ways that the Christian right is working hard to bring about the apocalypse through their support of the Dark One. At number 7 we have a new installment of “This Fucking Guy” and this week we’re going to profile a guy in the Trump administration who we should be paying a lot more attention to, and that’s interior secretary Ryan Zinke (7). At number 8 is Infowars (8). They are gearing up to launch a 24/7 news channel. If you think Alex Jones is crazy on a 4 hour cycle, wait until you see him on a 24 hour cycle! In the number 9 (NEIN!!!!) slot we have a new installment of our favorite segment “People Are Dumb” because well, people are dumb! Finally this week it’s the grand championship of our Stupidest State 2018 contest! I can’t wait to see what we have in store as we crown our champion! Who will it be? Will it be the almighty Florida or will it be my old Kentucky home? We have the commissioner of the NFFSA here and the champagne is on the ice! Plus we have a very special musical guest – one of the biggest bands in the world right now, and we got them for our crappy little show. I’m of course talking about the one, the only Panic At The Disco! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]Gun Nut Apologists
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Excuse me a minute.

God damn it. Have we learned nothing? No, of course we haven’t. I know what country I live in, and I know what year this is. It’s not even been two months since Parkland and we’re literally starting the same cycle of bullshit over again. Another week and yet another mass shooting. This time it’s also at a high school - in Texas.

Shots were fired at a high school in Southeast Texas Friday morning, leading to injuries, school officials said. A person was arrested at the scene as authorities swarmed the campus. Several local news organizations reported multiple fatalities, citing law enforcement sources.

The shooting occurred at Santa Fe High School in Galveston County, south of Houston. There was no immediate word on how many people were injured or what their condition was. But the president of the Houston Police Officers’ Union, Joseph Gamaldi, tweeted that a wounded officer was being transported to a hospital via helicopter. “Please keep the officers in your prayers,” Gamaldi wrote.

“The situation is active, but has been contained,” the Santa Fe Independent School District said shortly after 9 a.m. Central Time. “There have been confirmed injuries.” The district said law enforcement officers were securing the building.

An assistant principal at Santa Fe High School told ABC-13 in Houston that a shooter had been “arrested and secured.” The television station reported that law enforcement sources said the shooter appeared to be a student.

Students told the station that there was an evacuation at the high school as a fire alarm sounded. Some ran as the shooter began firing. There was a panicked scene as students sought to contact parents.


That’s definitely not the worst thing about this shooting that happened. Even that very day this idiot who graduated Kent State – a site where a mass shooting happened – posted this:


I wouldn't be concerned with the fact that someone is trying to take her AR-15. I would be more concerned that someone has taken her empathy, common sense, and dignity because she is clearly lacking all 3 of these things! So getting back to the story at hand – you want to know the definition of “too soon”? Just ask this guy who was coming to the high school with a gun and a MAGA hat, because, reasons:

In a video that’s gone viral on Twitter, a man carrying an American flag and a holstered gun on his hip says he showed up at the scene of a high school shooting in Santa Fe, Texas, to “Make America great again.”

According to the Houston Chronicle, the man was speaking to KHOU-TV when a reporter asked him what what was going through his head when he heard about the active shooter situation at Santa Fe High School on Friday morning.

“Get to the school,” the man says in the video, tweeted by San Francisco Bay-area NBC journalist Scott McGraw. He said his plan of action was “offering support” and that “‘God bless y’all’ will go a long ways right now for a lot of people.”

The video then cuts to an unidentified man, who calls the man with the gun “an embarrassment.”

Yeah dude you’re definitely not helping and you may want to get the fuck out. So now we’re in the “who’s to blame” phase of the mass shooting stages of grief. Of course you should know by now that the mass shooting stages of grief do not include “acceptance”. They’re pretty much “blame everyone but the gun”. And nobody does it better than the NRA’s Dana Loesch:

National Rifle Association spokeswoman Dana Loesch accused the media of "creating" mass shooters by extensively covering perpetrators' identities.

"The media has got to stop creating more of these monsters by oversaturation," Loesch said on NRATV]. "I'm not saying don't responsibly report on things as they happen."

"Look, I understand it. But constantly showing the image of the murderer, constantly saying their name is completely unnecessary."

Loesch's comments came a day after a gunman opened fire at Santa Fe High School, near Houston, Texas, killing at least 10 people and injuring another 10.

Read more: http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/388459-nras-dana-loesch-says-media-is-creating-mass-shooters

Well, Dana, let’s extrapolate your hyperbolic rantings here for a minute. If the media really did create this monster, what does that say about our media? Well when you see what kind of person the shooter is, and who he supports, well…

Dimitrios Pagourtzis, the suspected gunman who opened fire at a Texas high school on Friday morning, apparently posted photos of neo-Nazi iconography online, according to social media accounts flagged by classmates and reviewed by The Daily Beast.

Galveston County Sheriff Henry Trochesset said the suspect was a 17-year-old male student at Santa Fe High School where 10 people were killed. The suspect was taken into custody, Trochesset told reporters. Explosive devices were left inside the school near Houston, authorities said. The suspect reportedly had an assault-style rifle, shotgun, and pistol.

Pagourtzis was identified by law-enforcement officials as the suspect to CBS News and the Associated Press. Two Santa Fe students also told The Daily Beast that Pagourtzis was the gunman and they confirmed a Facebook account with Pagourtzis’ name belonged to him. Attempts by The Daily Beast to reach Pagourtzis’ family were unsuccessful.

On April 30, Pagourtzis apparently posted a t-shirt with “born to kill” printed on the front, boasting that it was custom-made.

Read more: https://www.thedailybeast.com/dimitrios-pagourtzis-reportedly-idd-as-santa-fe-texas-shooting-suspect

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[font size="8"]Dan Patrick
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One guy who clearly isn’t helping is the Lieutenant Governor of Texas, Dan Patrick. So Houston is his district, and he offered some of the most asinine suggestions on what we can do to end this madness once and for all. No, he didn’t propose firearm control. No, he didn’t propose that any kind of restrictions on firearm sales or anything that might you know, save lives. What he did propose was one of the most asinine suggestions yet.

In addition to the "thoughts and prayers" pro-gun politicians dependably trot out after a mass shooting, there's usually a wealth of ass-backward logic to explain why guns shouldn't receive any blame for the bloodshed.

In the wake of this morning's Santa Fe High School shooting, Texas Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick wasted no time with the contortions.

Within hours, the Republican was at a press conference ruminating on how to stop future school shootings. Apparently, limiting access to guns isn't one of the options on the table, but redesigning thousands of Texas schools sure as hell is.

“We may have to look at the design of our schools moving forward, and retrofitting schools that are already built, and what I mean by that is there are too many entrances and too many exits to our over 8,000 campuses in Texas," he said.

"We’re going to have to be creative," he added.

Too many exits? Here’s the thing – Dan, you know what also devalues life? Guns. Thank you! And it’s bad enough that the NRA has made us sitting ducks, let’s arm teachers, close off all the exits, and appoint wannabe Rambos as hall monitors! What a great idea! Doing something creative might be, I don’t know, actually doing your job and protecting the people who elected you! Thank you! And that wasn’t all – Dan actually made things worse by blaming everything but the gun!

The Texas lieutenant governor, speaking two days after 10 people were killed in a school shooting in his state, said abortion, divorce and violent video games and movies show that 'we have devalued life,' which he pointed to as a cause of school shootings.

Republican Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick told ABC News Chief Anchor George Stephanopoulos on "This Week" Sunday, "We have devalued life, whether it's through abortion, whether it's the breakup of families, through violent movies, and particularly violent video games."

Patrick continued, "Psychologists and psychiatrists will tell you that students are desensitized to violence, may have lost empathy for their victims by watching hours and hours of video violent games.”

He said, “the problem is multifaceted. It's not any one issue. But we, again, we have to look at our culture of violence, just our violent society, our Facebook, our Twitter, the bullying of adults on adults, and children on children. We have to look at ourselves, George, it's not about the guns, it's about us.”

And we’re still not done yet! Guess what NRA approved talking point surfaced last week courtesy of Mr. Patrick? Yup you guessed it! Let’s arm teachers! And we wonder why the rest of the world is laughing at us!

Texas Lieutenant Governor Dan Patrick (R) responded Sunday to the high school shooting in Santa Fe, Texas by pushing for arming teachers and reducing school entrances.

In an interview with CNN, the well-known conservative made the case for arming teachers saying, “We need armed teachers, trained how to handle active shooters.” He continued, “We need to get down to one or two entrances into our schools.”

Patrick visited injured students Friday with Governor Abbott and Senator Cruz where students and parents told them that their teachers needed to be armed. Patrick used the example of a former Marine teacher who could only lock the door in defense of students. He said, “some feel had he been able to carry a gun, he may have been able to stop that shooter.”

In an ABC interview, the Lt. Governor referenced the Second Amendment saying, “Our teachers are part of that well-run militia.” He added, “It’s guns that also stop crimes.”

The former State Senator argued that the plague of school shooters isn’t just about guns, “it’s about us”.

So it’s bad enough that bullets are coming from one direction, let’s arm the teachers and have armed hall monitors patrolling the hallways of our schools. Remember when Bush famously asked the question “Is our children learning”? Uh no they are getting shot at. And our elected officials – especially in Texas – aren’t helping things. If you think what Dan Patrick is proposing is certifiably insane, wait until you see what his boss is suggesting! Think the TSA but worse!

One of the most obvious changes that Texas can bring about is to improve school safety, Abbott said, noting that many in Santa Fe had asked him for that. After laying flowers at the high school on Sunday, the governor spoke about metal detectors and screening students for mental health problems.

Abbott said schools should consider screening students' social media accounts for threats or troubling behavior.

"We need to do that," he said, adding that Dimitrios Pagourtzis, the suspect in the Santa Fe shooting, had pictures on his Facebook page of a T-shirt that read, "Born to kill."

Abbott said Friday that he'd been planning to roll out several proposals for new gun laws in Texas before the shooting, including "speeding up background checks" and keeping guns away from people "who pose immediate danger."

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[font size="8"]Aaron Schlossberg
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So our current president, or the guy who we currently call “president” has the best people who support him doesn’t he? Well there’s an attorney in New York who’s currently under fire for going full MAGA Trump Train on a group of unsuspecting Latino workers in New York City. So let’s delve into a bit the kind of character that Mr. Schlossberg is. And by the way this is the kind of thing you never want to become famous for, but we suspect that he’ll have a nice, cushy job waiting for him at Fox News or Breitbart once the dust settles on this thing.

NEW YORK – A Jewish attorney in New York City came under fire on Thursday after video showing the lawyer berate two Spanish-speaking persons inside a Manhattan restaurant went viral.

The clip shows Aaron Schlossberg scolding two employees on Wednesday for communicating in Spanish during a lunch hour rush at the Fresh Kitchen restaurant on Madison Ave.

“Your staff are speaking Spanish to customers when they should be speaking English,” Schlossberg tells a staffer as another customer records the confrontation.

As the 42-year-old makes his way out of the restaurant, he can be seen angrily issuing a threat to call US Immigration and Customs Enforcement agents on the workers.

“And my guess is they’re not documented,” Schlossberg told to an employee, who appeared to be a manager. “So my next call is to ICE to have each one of them kicked out of my country.”

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Well guess what? If we didn’t say that was the worst thing Mr. Schlossberg has done, we’d be lying! Because of course he went full MAGA, and you never, ever go full MAGA.

Years before Manhattan lawyer Aaron Schlossberg became the internet’s current racist du jour, he was a bright-eyed student at the Haverford School, an elite private school on the Main Line, where, according to one classmate, he was not particularly well-liked.

“He was always a jerk,” Michael DiDomenico posted Thursday in the Lower Merion Community Network Facebook group.

DiDomenico claimed that he had “kicked his butt a couple times” — Schlossberg’s, that is — when they were kids and lamented that Schlossberg’s antics in New York had harmed the reputation of the prep school.

“I don’t know what his problem is,” DiDomenico said in an interview Friday, adding, “As a classmate, I’m disappointed that it hurts the Haverford School.”

And that’s *STILL* not the worst thing Mr. Schlossberg has done! Back in 2009, he was arrested and did jail time going full MAGA before going full MAGA was even a thing!

You’ve heard a lot about a fellow named Aaron Schlossberg this week. That’s what happens when racist villains get caught on viral video ranting like some racists are wont to do.

The week in Schlossberg started with the attorney berating employees in a New York City café because, in his apparent estimation, speaking Spanish in America warranted threats of calling ICE to get them deported.

It continued with eminently watchable videos of him fleeing reporters on the streets of the Big Apple making the social media rounds.

But as the 42-year-old's terrible, horrible, no good, very bad week comes to a close, there's one more nugget of interest.

When word broke that Schlossberg has local ties – i.e. to The Haverford School on the Main Line – whispers of a local arrest in 2009 also surfaced.


So you know the old saying “with friends like these, who needs enemies?”. But one thing I absolutely love is creative protests, and nothing is more creative when people come together than to tell a racist to fuck off.

NEW YORK -- An online campaign was created in the wake of a lawyer's tirade against Spanish-speaking workers, with a single aim: sending a mariachi band to perform outside his Upper West Side home.

Attorney Aaron Schlossberg has come under fire for a video that shows him ranting against Spanish-speaking employees at Fresh Kitchen in midtown Manhattan on Tuesday. As the video shows, Schlossberg presumed the employees live in the U.S. illegally on welfare paid by his taxes.

After he was identified, people shared previous footage of Schlossberg engaging in xenophobic hate speech. They also changed his law office's Google listing to a Spanish restaurant and drove his firm's Yelp rating down.

If that wasn't enough, a "Mariachis For Aaron" campaign on GoFundMe raised $1,094 in two days -- more than double its goal -- to send a Mariachi band to his office for a "Latin Party" with demonstrators.

"We are countering hate and racism with the sound of music," writes Mark Goldberg, creator of the GoFundMe account. "Any leftover money will be used to send a delicious Taco Truck lunch to the staff and a copy of all federal and state statute mentioning undocumented immigrants do not qualify for welfare."

By the way – one thing you never, ever want to do is to have the same name as someone who’s famous for all the wrong reasons. Because lost in all the news surrounding this MAGA supporter is a guy who has the same name as him.

This is life in the social media age: With every high-profile scandal comes a public shaming, and when society rolls out the online pillory, there’s a fair chance it contains an innocent person.

That’s what happened this week to Aaron B. Schlossberg — a 24-year-old beekeeper, skiier, and Ultimate Frisbee enthusiast in Burlington, Vt. — after a video went viral that showed New York attorney Aaron M. Schlossberg launch a racist tirade at restaurant workers conversing in Spanish.

The Vermont Schlossberg was at his job in a Burlington outdoor goods store when his cellphone began buzzing with Twitter notifications, he said in a phone interview Friday morning. Soon, his name was everywhere — except it wasn’t really his name.

“ ‘Aaron Schlossberg’ was trending, and that’s usually not a good sign when your name is trending on Twitter,” he said

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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You know there’s times when you just can’t help not making Nazi comparisons. Especially when the guy who you currently call “president” literally dehumanizes an entire group of people! Seriously, remember when the worst thing we had to worry about was what brand of mustard Obama used on his hot dog? Oh how I missed those times! Of course that’s what they won’t tell you, sir! Yeah sure they kind of tried to help calm down the inevitable shit storm that followed when Trump made one particular comment about a group of people trying to cross the border, and if there’s anything that could possibly be considered the most sensitive subject among MAGAholes is the border. Well let’s explain.

Tripling down on its efforts to prove that President Donald Trump was only referring to members of the MS-13 gang as “animals” — not all undocumented immigrants — the White House released a statement Monday morning explaining the origins and crimes of the “violent animals of MS-13.”

The statement — titled “What you need to know about the violent animals of MS-13”—outlines some of the horrific crimes committed by members of the gang in the suburbs of New York City and Washington, D.C. in the past two years. The statement called MS-13 members “animals” nearly 10 times.

During a panel discussion with California officials who oppose the state’s sanctuary immigration policies last week, Trump appeared to refer to immigrants who have been taken out of the country for attempting to illegally enter the U.S. as “bad ” people and “animals.” Trump later clarified — both to reporters and on Twitter — that he was referring to members of the MS-13 gang. Read a transcript of the conversation in question here.

In the new statement, the White House repeatedly referred to the group as “the MS-13 animals” as it outlined the brutal rapes and murders the group is believed to have committed in recent years, as the gang has risen to national notoriety for its violent attacks in the U.S.

“MS-13 is a transnational gang that has brought violence, fear, and suffering to American communities,” the statement said. “MS-13, short for Mara Salvatrucha, commits shocking acts of violence to instill fear, including machete attacks, executions, gang rape, human trafficking, and more.


Yeah you know what? Let’s roll back a bit! Did Trump say those extremely horrible things about MS-13, did he mean it about all “illegal” immigrants, or was Fox News just feeding him some bad intel? Well no matter which way he said it, it is absolutely terrible no matter what context its’ in.

WASHINGTON — President Trump used extraordinarily harsh rhetoric to renew his call for stronger immigration laws Wednesday, calling undocumented immigrants "animals" and venting frustration at Mexican officials who he said "do nothing" to help the United States.

“We have people coming into the country or trying to come in, we're stopping a lot of them, but we're taking people out of the country. You wouldn't believe how bad these people are," Trump said.

"These aren't people. These are animals."

Trump's comments came in a freewheeling, hour-long White House meeting with local California leaders opposed to so-called "sanctuary city" policies. "California's law provides safe harbor to some of the most vicious and violent offenders on Earth, like MS-13 gang members putting innocent men, women, and children at the mercy of these sadistic criminals," he said.

His comment about "animals" came after Fresno County Sheriff Margaret Mims complained that state law forbids her from telling U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement about undocumented immigrants in her jail — even if she suspects they're part of a gang.

But Trump might actually be wrong about MS-13. Yeah some of the things that they’re saying are extremely horrible crimes and there’s no way that anyone should get away with them. This is why media deregulation is dangerous, and why Trump will only make things worse.

President Trump claimed Tuesday night in the State of the Union address that the changes he wants to U.S. immigration laws are needed to keep Americans safe. The central piece of evidence in his argument was MS-13, the deadly gang also known as Mara Salvatrucha.

“Tonight, I am calling on the Congress to finally close the deadly loopholes that have allowed MS-13 and other criminal gangs to break into our country,” Trump said. He also invited the parents of two young women killed by MS-13 members in Long Island to be his guests at the speech.

But in pointing to MS-13 to try to scare Americans into harsh new immigration restrictions, Trump is overstating the danger the gang poses here in the United States. Worse, by using the gang to demonize all Latino immigrants, Trump is building inner-city walls that alienate communities and risk making criminal organizations more powerful, both here and overseas.

Things are different in the United States. According to Justice Department estimates, MS-13 is a small gang, compared with the Bloods, Crips and Almighty Latin King Nation. The estimated 10,000 MS-13 gang members in the United States account for less than 1 percent of the estimated 1.4 million total gang members in the country. According to CNN, 104 of the 1,300 gang members arrested during an Immigration and Customs Enforcement sweep last May — 8 percent — were linked to MS-13.

And the gang did not come from south of the border. MS-13 is as American-made as Google — or, for that matter, as Trump. MS-13 was founded in Los Angeles in the 1980s by children of Salvadoran immigrants who fled a brutal civil war, a war which was substantially funded by the United States. The early members were teenagers who hung out on street corners and bonded around reefer and rock concerts, not unlike thousands of other kids living in Southern California’s underprivileged communities.

Read more: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/posteverything/wp/2018/01/31/trump-is-wrong-about-ms-13-and-his-rhetoric-will-make-it-worse/

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[font size="8"] Top 10 Investigates: Responsible Gun Ownership
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It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates.

America has the highest concentration of guns in the entire world. It also has the highest concentration of mass shootings in the world. Every time a mass shooting occurs, we have the same dialogue coming from conservatives and members of the National Rifle Association about “responsible gun ownership” but when you look beyond the headlines, there really is anything but responsible gun ownership. And we will take this time to show you a heap of responsible gun owners.

A country where one in three households owns guns is a country where a lot of children grow up alongside deadly weapons. New calculations indicate just how many of those kids live in homes where adults fail to safely store their firearms.

According to the analysis, an estimated 4.6 million American children reside in a household where at least one gun is kept loaded and unlocked. The study’s authors also determined that the share of child-rearing gun owners who don’t secure all their firearms has more than doubled since the last time similar research was conducted.

The findings were published online on May 10 in the Journal of Urban Health, a little more than a week before a gun rampage outside of Houston provided a horrific illustration of the dangers that arise when firearms are left accessible to children and teens.

Kids find guns and unintentionally shoot themselves or others. Unsecured firearms are a leading means of youth suicide. As the nation was reminded last Friday, children also sometimes use their parents’ or caregivers’ guns to commit homicides or mass murders: The 17-year-old student charged with fatally shooting 10 and wounding 13 more at his high school in Sante Fe, Texas, on Friday reportedly carried out his attack with a shotgun and revolver belonging to his father. A federal analysis of school shootings released in 2004 found that 65 percent of perpetrators used a gun owned by a relative.

Yes, there are more unsecured guns than there are school children in this country. So if you’re sitting at home and you are wondering how did we get to this point, well that might be one of your answers right there. But the solutions to gun violence aren’t just obvious – they’re staring us right in the face, yes, just picture that image for a minute!

Mass shootings actually make up a small fraction of America’s gun deaths, constituting less than 2 percent of such deaths in 2013. But America does see a lot of these horrific events: According to CNN, “The US makes up less than 5% of the world’s population, but holds 31% of global mass shooters.”

The US also has by far the highest number of privately owned guns in the world. Estimated in 2007, the number of civilian-owned firearms in the US was 88.8 guns per 100 people, meaning there was almost one privately owned gun per American and more than one per American adult. The world’s second-ranked country was Yemen, a quasi-failed state torn by civil war, where there were 54.8 guns per 100 people.

Another way of looking at that: Americans make up less than 5 percent of the world’s population yet own roughly 42 percent of all the world’s privately held firearms.

These two facts — on gun deaths and firearm ownership — are related. The research, compiled by the Harvard School of Public Health’s Injury Control Research Center, is pretty clear: After controlling for variables such as socioeconomic factors and other crime, places with more guns have more gun deaths. Researchers have found this to be true not just with homicides, but also with suicides (which in recent years were around 60 percent of US gun deaths), domestic violence, and even violence against police.

Yes America owns so many guns that it eclipses the next 42 countries combined. That is an absolutely shocking statistic and one you should definitely take away from this week. But it gets worse – so much worse. We’ve been having this same conversation about guns more or less the last 40 years and it’s always the same thing. But it seems it’s got progressively worse in the last

Today, 19 children will die or receive emergency treatment for a gunshot wound in the U.S. And tomorrow, another 19 will. And then another 19 the next day. In fact, 91% of all children who die from firearms in high-income countries across the world come from the United States, and guns are the third leading cause of death for all children between ages 1 and 17. Those are a handful of the sobering statistics reported in a new study on gun violence in Pediatrics.

Yet the myth persists that the freedom to own a gun without a universal requirement of background checks or a legal requirement to store those guns safely and out of children’s reach supersedes the lives of American children. Until the U.S. as a whole decides to recognize and accept what the tremendous cost of current lenient gun laws is, more than 1,000 more children will die next year. And the year after that. (Read here how to reduce your child's risk.)

Deaths of children and teens under 18 years old had been declining from 2006 to 2013, but they have increased over the past two years, just as the number of guns owned in the U.S. have dramatically increased.

One in ten children’s deaths in 2014 and 2015 resulted from a gunshot wound, noted Eliot Nelson, MD, a professor of pediatrics at University of Vermont Children’s Hospital in Burlington, in a commentary about the new study.

Yes holy shit indeed. But as has already been pointed out, America loves guns and death machines more than it loves its’ own children. But denial is definitely one of the most powerful drugs known to man – and America is in deep denial about guns. But never mind that Americans think that the solution to a gun problem is more guns.

Gun control is still going nowhere in Congress. And in fact, with every major mass shooting in America, gun-rights supporters seem to be digging in even further -- and bringing the rest of America along with them.

It's an echo of a familiar theme from NRA head Wayne LaPierre. "The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun," LaPierre said frequently amid the more recent gun-control debate.

And most Americans agree with this logic, according to a 2014 Pew Research Poll. Since the 2012 Newtown, Conn., massacre of 26 people, including 20 school children, the poll found a nine-point rise in the number of Americans who think gun ownership could "protect people from becoming victims of crime."

Increasingly, Americans see guns as the answer -- not the problem -- to mass shootings.

In fact, the pro-gun-rights lobby is so powerful and its voters so active that Democratic senators who support gun laws tend to reverse their positions before reelection, a 2014 research paper by the National Bureau of Economic Research found.


There you have it. That is one of the biggest problems in America today. Denial and more guns. That is it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

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[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Gather around my fair brothers and sisters! It is time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it is our weekly duty to remind us that the holiest among us are the most full of:

So… my fair congregation, since the election of the Dark One, the holiest among us on the extreme far right are working hard to bring about the end of days! If you haven’t noticed this, you are not paying attention, and I suggest you should. After the US moved the embassy in the holy land of Isreal to Jerusalem, the proverbial shit hit the fan! But there are other ways did you know – you all know this – that the Christian right is trying to bring about the end of days! Like the Royal Wedding for instance!

Religious Right activist Dave Daubenmire said on his “Pass The Salt Live” webcast this morning that the royal wedding this weekend between Prince Harry and Meghan Markle was a “psy op” intended to promote “the blending of the races.”

Daubenmire, who has declared that he is “proud to be white” because “white, heterosexual, Christian” men represent America’s only hope for survival, has fretted about the threat of white genocide, and has fumed that interracial marriage weakened this nation “because multiculturalism is spiritual AIDS [that] has brought an infection into what was once a great Christian American culture,” said that the marriage of Prince Harry to a woman of “mixed blood” is an attempt to corrupt the pure bloodline of House of Windsor.

“Let me just lay it out there, because most people won’t say it because they don’t want to sound racist,” Daubenmire said while wearing a literal tinfoil hat. “Prince Harry’s wife is half-black. Now, wait a minute. That ain’t that royal bloodline lineage there, is it fellas? Isn’t there a little bit of mixed blood coming in there?”

Daubenmire also took issue with the fact that Bishop Michael Curry, a black Episcopal pastor, delivered an address during the ceremony.

You know there may not be the blending of the races, but there is definitely integration of complete dumbasses in our society! Can I get an amen??? Now did you know that banning something that should be considered a crime against humanity will also result in the inevitable apocalypse?

Gordon Klingenschmitt and Matt Barber, anti-LGBT activists and co-founders of Christian Civil Rights Watch—“the civil rights cause of our day” according to Barber—posted a conversation last week criticizing a California bill targeting so-called conversion therapy and celebrating a new high-profile spokesman for the “ex-gay” movement.

Luis Ruiz, a survivor of the shooting at Orlando’s Pulse nightclub, was a speaker at the “Freedom March” organized earlier this month by “ex-gay” activists and “Activist Mommy” Elizabeth Johnston.

“I love this story,” said Barber, “because it’s a story of redemption and freedom from demonic oppression and persecution and a sin lifestyle that I believe frankly is spiritual in nature.”

Barber also loves the “ex-gay” story because, he says, it is “a clear and present danger to the born-that-way myth.”

Like many “ex-gay” activists, Ruiz describes an unhappy gay life of drugs, alcohol, and promiscuous sex..

Yes this is only the most epic of fails! So apparently banning an evil practice is going to lead to Christianity being banned! Do these morons even hear themselves talk? Or do they say the most horrible thing they can think of to intentionally piss us off?

During a “Ministers and Leaders Conference” at his Florida church yesterday, right-wing pastor and radical conspiracy theorist Rodney Howard-Browne declared that the world is controlled by blood-drinking Luciferians and that many members of Congress are involved in pedophilia.

Howard-Browne, who laid hands upon and prayed over President Trump in the Oval Office last year, asserted that Trump has been obligated to withhold information about the assassination of President John F. Kennedy because otherwise “they would have to pick up George Bush senior in his wheelchair right now and stick him in Guantanamo prison because the Bush family is a crime cabal.”

Howard-Browne said that despite the fact that Republicans currently control all the levers of power in Washington, they still can’t get anything done “because the whole thing is controlled through the Luciferian structure of the globe.”

“At the highest level, the people that rule the planet worship Lucifer,” he said. “These people perform human sacrifices and drink blood.”

Well, Pastor Browne is right about one thing – the people who rule the planet do in fact worship Lucifer, and right now Putin is the man who rules the planet, and he has a rocket called “Satan 2” that he can wipe out entire civilizations with!! So Lucifer really is running the planet and he is bringing about the end of days!!! Can I get an amen??? But apparently we have a savior folks! Yes, a savior and son of the almighty who can vanquish these demons!!!

Monday morning’s “Prophetic Insight” newsletter from Pentecostal media operation Charisma highlights a blog post claiming that God has “released a flaming torch” over President Trump to push Trump’s enemies into “retreat and defeat.”

Christian media outlets’ relentless cheerleading for Trump, and their constant portrayal of Trump as carrying out a divine mission, certainly helps explain Trump’s sky-high approval among conservative white evangelicals, and his repeated efforts to keep that core of his base support happy.

Today’s post by author and preacher Andy Sanders includes a disclaimer that his article “is not intended to be political.” No, not at all:

Over the past several weeks, God showed me numerous attacks that the enemy is attempting to make against our president, Donald Trump. As I was praying about the attacks against our president, the Lord began to connect the dots. He started showing me how this person was connected to that group, and that group was connected to another group; and how particular events weren’t accidents, but rather planned out; and also how particular statement weren’t just comments blurted against him, but were strategic in nature.

Yes, what is wrong with these people? He gives you a real godly man, you repay him by electing the dark one and telling America to go fuck itself! But… be forewarned, my fair congregation! That although things may seem peachy now, DAYMONS and DEVILS wait in the wings!!

Wednesday’s CrossTalk program on VCY America featured a conversation about the danger of Catholicism merging with Islam to create the false one world religion warned about in the biblical book of Revelation. VCY America is a Milwaukee-based Christian broadcasting operation that owns 25 full-power radio stations, mostly in the Midwest, and reaches others through affiliate stations and online.

The featured guest was Mike Gendron, described as a former Catholic and the founder and director of Proclaiming the Gospel ministry, which is dedicated to trying to rescue Catholics who are “victims of deception” and convert them to “biblical Christianity.” Gendron’s group also sells an audio recording of his one world religion warning.

As RWW has reported, major Religious Right figures have said that Islam is not really a religion but a totalitarian ideology and therefore not worthy of First Amendment protection. Gendron has similar thoughts about the Catholic Church. He says that Catholicism is, like Islam, not only a religion but a political identity, and says that “they share a similar political ideology.”

On the Crosstalk page promoting the show, they list what Gendron calls the “common bonds” between the two religions, and he and host Jim Schneider talked through them. He says Catholicism and Islam both.

There you have it, folks! A satanic merger awaits us, and that will signal in the end of days! Although it was really the election of the Dark One! I hope that is the take away you get this week. Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]This Fucking Guy: Ryan Zinke
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It’s time for a new installment of:

This week’s This Fucking Guy is a guy in the Trump administration who you may not be familiar with but should definitely get yourself more familiar with. He’s the interior secretary of the Trump administration – Ryan Zinke. In case you haven’t noticed, nearly *EVERYONE* connected to the Trump administration has been involved in some sort of scandal, and Zinke is no different. In fact he’s been abusing his position as the head of this department for quite some time.

The Trump administration on Monday proposed rolling back a 2015 rule that bans aggressive predator control tactics in national preserves in Alaska, including shooting bear cubs and wolf pups in their dens ― a move immediately blasted by environmental groups.

The proposal, slated to be published Tuesday in the Federal Register, would amend the National Park Service’s current regulations to again allow for controversial sport hunting and trapping techniques on roughly 20 million acres of federal lands in Alaska. The park service, part of the Department of the Interior, said lifting the prohibitions would increase hunting opportunities on national preserve land, as Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke called for in a pair of secretarial orders last year.

The proposed rule would allow hunters to lure brown and black bears with bait, hunt black bears and their cubs using artificial lights, shoot bear cubs and wolf and coyote pups in their dens, and use dogs to hunt black bears. It would also allow hunters to shoot swimming caribou from motorboats.

Yeah unfortunately it’s not a cartoon there guys. This is quite possibly one of the worst things the Trump administration has done and they’re going to get away with it. But this fucking guy Ryan Zinke is once again one of the worst things to happen to the Trump administration. And if they get their way on this “extreme hunting” tactic this is not going to be good for anyone, especially the bears!

WASHINGTON (AP) — The Trump administration is moving to reverse Obama-era rules barring hunters on some public lands in Alaska from baiting brown bears with bacon and doughnuts and using spotlights to shoot mother black bears and cubs hibernating in their dens.

The National Park Service issued a notice Monday of its intent to amend regulations for sport hunting and trapping in national preserves to bring the federal rules in line with Alaska state law.
Expanding hunting rights on federal lands has been a priority for Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke.

Under the proposed changes, hunters would also be allowed to hunt black bears with dogs, kill wolves and pups in their dens, and use motor boats to shoot swimming caribou.

These and other hunting methods — condemned as cruel by wildlife protection advocates — were outlawed on federal lands in 2015. Members of the public have 60 days to provide comment on the proposed new rules.

Oh come on, Mr. Zinke, what did bears do to you? I mean despite that they are godless killing machines, don’t deserve this kind of cruelty. Are they after your picnic baskets? What fresh hell could await us if this is unleashed? Well besides the fact that we’re living every day in this nightmare of an administration!

The Trump administration on Monday proposed rolling back a 2015 rule that bans aggressive predator control tactics in national preserves in Alaska, including shooting bear cubs and wolf pups in their dens―a move immediately blasted by environmental groups.

The proposal, slated to be published Tuesday in the Federal Register, would amend the National Park Service’s current regulations to again allow for controversial sport hunting and trapping techniques on roughly 20 million acres of federal lands in Alaska. The park service, part of the Department of the Interior, said lifting the prohibitions would increase hunting opportunities on national preserve land, as Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke called for in a pair of secretarial orders last year.

The proposed rule would allow hunters to lure brown and black bears with bait, hunt black bears and their cubs using artificial lights, shoot bear cubs and wolf and coyote pups in their dens, and use dogs to hunt black bears. It would also allow hunters to shoot swimming caribou from motorboats.

Environmental groups voiced disgust at the attempt to strip away protections.

Oh and in case you’re wondering – not only does Trump plan to roll back yet *ANOTHER* Obama era protection, he’ll do it with a big shit eating grin on his face! And he’ll have this guy to do it, who will once again abuse his position like everyone else in this administration has.

(CNN)In September, women gun owners and enthusiasts from the National Rifle Association headed to a plush Four Seasons resort in Texas for an annual retreat and clay shooting at the Dallas Gun Club with one of the weekend's headliners: Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke.

Zinke went to target practice with the women, posting about their marksmanship on Twitter -- #GalsWithGuns -- as part of his two-night stay. He also stopped at a posh office park in Dallas to meet with a small group that included wealthy Republican donors who raised money for Trump's presidential campaign. The meeting appears on the secretary's official schedule as an informal luncheon with community leaders focused on sporting and conservation.

Zinke's choice to meet with donors in the midst of official business is one of several travel decisions during his first year as secretary that have some critics questioning his priorities, even if they don't necessarily violate agency rules. Zinke's travel habits have already spawned two investigations, including one looking into whether his activities are in violation of the Hatch Act, which limits the political activity of federal employees.

So there you have it, another instance where the right to own a gun is more important than your right to live. That’s Ryan Zinke, this week’s:

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[font size="8"]Infowars
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This is 2018. We live in an era where we are constantly just bombarded with one clusterfuck after another with this train wreck of an administration. So the last thing you need to stop a train wreck is another train wreck! I’m of course talking about Alex Jones. So what batshit crazy thing is Alex up to this week? And you know it’s going to be certifiably insane. So Infowars is gearing up to launch its’ own 24 hour a day news network. Think of it like Fox News but with more stories of celebrity spirit cooking and satanic pedophiles!

Infowars creator Alex Jones said that he was looking to hire “around 15 people, maybe even more” in order to transform Infowars into a 24-hour live television broadcast.

A video uploaded this morning advertises the network’s new recruitment drive, which Jones told viewers is aimed at taking Infowars live to television for 24-hours a day, a major expansion from the network’s current weekday programming from 9 a.m. to 7 p.m. Eastern Time.

“We are launching our biggest recruitment and hiring operation ever in our 23-year history as we prepare to go 24 hours a day live on TV and radio from the Infowars news center here in Austin, Texas,” Jones said.

He added, “We’re looking to hire around 15 people, maybe even more, as we take the information war to the next level in the face of the globalists.”

So it seems that we may soon be subject to even more hours of the debased conspiracy theories, misinformation, anti-LGBTQ comments, violent rhetoric, unhinged ranting, and absolute meltdowns we can expect from Infowars.

And in case you’re wondering, Alex Jones is already batshit crazy on a 4 hour cycle. Imagine how he will be on a 24 hour cycle! Ooh, think of the products Infowars will be able to hawk! The lead industry must be loving this! Well here’s the kind of quality rant you’ll be able to expect!

Alex Jones, the conspiracy theorist heading up Infowars, assured his listeners in a minutes-long screaming diatribe that he didn’t think they were stupid. He said that he could “feel the spirit rising” and that “the tide turned” so much that Infowars is breaking the backs of its enemies.

During today’s broadcast on Infowars, Jones said that he believed that Infowars viewers were intelligent, unlike liberals, who Jones said “think you’re a goldfish.”

“I don’t think you’re stupid. I’ve been betting on you my whole life. I believe in you,” Alex Jones screamed. “And we got Trump elected. And we got the economy coming back. And we’re kicking these traitors’ asses, politically, and we’re not backing down ever,” Jones said.

He screamed and snorted.

“I want to get these people,” he continued to scream. “We’re winning. I can feel the spirit rising, can’t you? The turning point was yesterday. I was sick all day, spiritually. I could feel the enemy launching with all its hate. But now, the tide turned today.”

Jones declared, “The tide turned on the 22nd day of May. We have broken their back. Yes! I can feel it.”

I have to say I love it when Alex gets that crazy because he really does grunt and groan like a baboon on safari. When he does that I say grab a bucket of popcorn and a beer and enjoy the show! So picture Alex Jones ranting like this 24 hours a day. Go on, do it. Do it now! It’s gonna be a train wreck. Especially when things like this get said.

Alex Jones, the conspiracy theorist heading up Infowars, told listeners today that Democrats use members of the violent gang MS-13 as its personal “meth-dealing army.”

Jones was reacting to remarks House Democratic Leader Nancy Pelosi made yesterday in response to President Trump describing MS-13 gang members as “animals.” Jones claimed that Pelosi criticized Trump because MS-13 is secretly used by the Democratic party to kill people.

“The Democratic party uses MS-13 to kill people. I have confirmed this with our law enforcement and Army sources. I’ve confirmed it with CIA sources, that the Democratic party uses MS-13 nationwide from Chicago to Dallas, Texas, from Austin, Texas, to LA. They use them as their secret army and they know Trump’s got a war going against MS-13 and has wiped thousands of them out, arrested thousands more,” Jones said.

He continued: “When MS-13 fights back, they’re getting smoked by the U.S. military all over this country right now and this Democrat dirtbag is pissed. Her meth-dealing army is in the crosshairs, you dirty, old, evil, globalist whore!”

I didn’t know we had a personal meth-dealing army. If so can I have some please? I may need some to get through the next two years! Preferably some from the Heisenberg signature blend. Alex must definitely be smoking some if he can’t even handle his own fans!

Alex Jones, the conspiracy theorist leader of Infowars, lashed out at viewers who doubted his claims that President Trump has ordered an Israel-Iran conflict media blackout and told them that they “don’t want to be helped” because they’d rather just “drink fluoride” and die.

Jones was streaming live video to his fans while driving yesterday and lashed out at the “dumb bastards” who doubted Jones’ claims that Trump has used executive wartime powers to order a media blackout regarding the ongoing Israel-Iran conflict. As he fumed, he told his critics that he is “not salmon shit,” whereas they are “squirting out the end of a salmon.”

“God, you libtards are dumb. You think because the big tech giants let you promote yourselves that that means you’re the leaders? I know I’m swimming upstream here because I’m not salmon shit. I’m a salmon. You’re squirting out the end of a salmon,” Jones said.

“Jesus, God,” he sighed. “The globalists told me a long time ago when [David] Rothkopf and [Henry] Kissinger group tried to hire me, they said, ‘Alex, you can’t get the public to wake up. They’re animals. We tried to help them. They only tear you apart.’ And it’s true.”

And by the way in case you’re wondering the caliber of person that Infowars is looking to hire, they recently interviewed a renowned, full blown 1488 white nationalist. So yeah forget MAGA, they’re going MAWA – Make America White Again! With friends like these, who needs enemies?

Faith Goldy, a white nationalist activist “journalist,” appeared on Infowars after anti-fascist protesters surrounded her at an event and knocked her phone out of her hand. Infowars, of course, never bothered to mention her extremist beliefs.

Over the weekend, Goldy went to a right-wing protest at the Quebec border at which antifascism counter-protesters surrounded her and knocked the cell phone she was using to record the encounter out of her hand. Infowars and other right-wing outlets have been able to build significant followings by pushing stories about violent anti-fascism protesters who supposedly terrorize all people who hold conservative views, so some outlets have booked Goldy to recap the violent encounter for their audiences. But none of the outlets featuring Goldy, such as Infowars, bother to mention her white nationalist beliefs and her resulting inflammatory rhetoric.

Goldy is a red-pill overdose victim who was fired from Rebel Media after she appeared on a podcast associated with the neo-Nazi blog Daily Stormer after she attended the alt-right “Unite the Right” rally in Charlottesville, Virginia, last year where counter-protester Heather Heyer was murdered. She has sworn-off so-called “civic nationalism” in favor of white supremacist “ethnonationalism” because “there is still a white majority” in the United States and she believes the government should work to maintain it. Last year, Goldy happily recited the “14 words,” the world’s most famous white supremacist slogan, and said she didn’t think it was controversial. Goldy is a semi-regular guest on white nationalist radio station Red Ice and was recently banned from crowdfunding site Patreon for violating its guidelines against hate speech.

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[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
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Let us hit that shit!

Of course you know by now that people are people and people are dumb. So I want to start with this story out of Colorado and it’s good to know that Florida Man has relatives in every single part of the country. If you’re trying to beat a drug test, maybe one thing you shouldn’t do is use a microwave to try to heat up your urine. Yes, this is a thing that was done!

A Colorado woman has been cited by police after a container of what appeared to be urine blew up as she was heating it up in a microwave at a 7-Eleven.

Police say the incident occurred in the convenience store chain’s Aurora location last week when the clerk heard a loud bang and saw 26-year-old Angelique Sanchez take a white plastic bottle out of the microwave.

A police report says when confronted by the clerk, Sanchez wiped a yellow liquid that smelled like urine onto the floor and walked out.

Police located Sanchez at a nearby clinic where she had planned to take a urinalysis test for a potential employer.

Next up we’re going to where else but our favorite state of Florida. You know if you look like this guy, you should probably not be giving advice to underage kids about sex education. In fact you should probably be kept 500 feet away from schools and playgrounds.

Clearwater Beach Police say a Florida man climbed on top of playground equipment and yelled a vulgar explanation of where babies come from as the children played.

An officer said he watched 30-year-old Otis Dawayne Ryan climb on top of a piece of equipment where children were playing Sunday and start shouting that babies come out of women. The officer said Ryan used inappropriate language. Parents rushed to remove their children from the busy playground.

Earlier in the day, police said Ryan approached tourists and made inappropriate comments to women in an effort to get their male partners to confront him. An officer was watching him at the time.

Ryan was charged with disorderly conduct, found guilty and fined $118.

Yeah no you’re just a creep. Next up – we’re sticking with creeps but we’re going to the state of Iowa for this one. You know one thing you don’t do in a public restroom? Have a literal penis measuring contest!

A man who was arrested for measuring his penis with a ruler while at a urinal inside a University of Iowa bathroom has struck a plea deal that will spare him jail time, but which requires completion of a sex offender treatment program, according to court records.

Thomas Morgan, 44, was arrested on multiple indecent exposure counts following a bizarre incident inside the school’s Main Library in Iowa City.

Police reported that Morgan “partially turned his body towards the victim/witness,” who was using a urinal at the time. Morgan, seen at righ, then “measured his penis against a cardboard ruler,” according to a criminal complaint.

The victim told cops that Morgan “made a comment regarding his size,” adding that he “felt weird and uncomfortable” seeing Morgan’s “semi-erect penis.” The man added that atop two of the urinals were cardboard rulers with “dark sharpie markings regarding penis size.”

Yeah you would think Batman’s would be bigger wouldn’t you? Next up we’re going to go to South Carolina in this story. Just… how… who.. what… I can’t even. Look, I don’t want to know what the clerks who were making this cake were thinking, but it’s very interesting that their mind went there when making a cake for her son’s graduation accomplishment.

A mother who wanted to celebrate her son in epic fashion for a 4.79 GPA upon graduation says a regional grocery chain refused to ice the words she requested because it considered "Summa Cum Laude" to be profanity.

Cara Koscinski, of South Carolina, wrote in a weekend Facebook post that she ordered a cake online from Publix. The confection was supposed to say "Congrats Jacob! Summa Cum Laude class of 2018."

She says the online message box took issue with the phrase. The computer marked the "cum," a Latin word meaning "with" in English, in "Summa Cum Laude" as a naughty word and substituted three hyphens.

Koscinski said she then filled in a box for special instructions, explaining the meaning of the Latin word and placed the $70 order. Another family member picked up the cake, not knowing what it was supposed to say.

It came with the hyphens.

"How utterly ridiculous ... Shame on you Publix for turning an innocent Latin phrase into a total embarrassment for having to explain to my son and others (including my 70 year old mother) about this joke of a cake," Koscinski wrote on Facebook. "My son was humiliated!!!"

She says the store gave her a refund and a gift card when she complained.

Oh come on even Shaq is giving you the facepalm! Although to be fair, if I were the friends I probably would have done the same thing. Next up, we’ve probably all seen that movie Horrible Bosses, right? And I’m sure we’ve all conjured up scenarios about what we would do if we won the lottery. Well for one guy in Illinois who got arrested carrying out his Horrible Boss fantasy, worth it!

54-year old Brian Morris, from the small town of Clarendon Hills in Dupage County, bought over 20,000 tons of manure and asked for it to be dumped on his former boss’ property, pretending it was his residence.

Dozens of trucks filled with manure showed up in front of the house around 6:00 this morning and began dumping their smelly cargo over the property’s lawn.

George Fitzgerald, Mr. Morris’ former employer, was awakened by the sound of the vehicles on his property and rapidly called the police.

Unfortunately, it took the police more than 15 minutes to arrive on the site, and more than 10,000 tons of manure had already been dumped in the meantime.

Brian Morris was standing right across the street and laughing when the police arrived, and he rapidly came over to confess his responsibility and explain his motivations.

Finally this week for People Are Dumb – maybe Stephen Colbert should change his number one threat from bears to pigs! Because pigs are dangerous and slippery characters who can follow you if you don’t notice!

Police in this Lorain County community thought they had a drunk on their hands when a man called to report a pig following him home from a train station.

A North Ridgeville officer arrived on the scene early Saturday to find the man was very sober and a pig was in fact following him.

The officer managed to get the pig in his patrol car and transported it to the station. It was eventually reunited with its owner.

Writing on Facebook, police mentioned "the irony of the pig in a police car now so that anyone that thinks they're funny is actually unoriginal and trying too hard."

At: https://www.cleveland.com/metro/index.ssf/2018/05/man_reports_being_followed_by.html

That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Stupidest State Contest: Championship
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16 states will enter, but only one will be crowned the new Top 10 Conservative Idiots Stupidest State!

Welcome back! Here we go folks! This is it – ground zero! It’s the championship for our Stupidest State contest! Last week it was quite the show at the Fabulous Forum in Inglewood, California, as Kentucky was absolutely brilliant (or not) against West Virginia, and took the Layover League, while Florida pulled off a brilliant game against Missouri and took the Flyover League. We’re here live at Staples Center in sunny (although currently cloudy) Los Angeles for all the festivities and the champagne is on ice! These two teams battled impossible odds to be here today and we will crown our champion! Will it be fan favorite Kentucky or will it be batshit crazy Florida who has been absolutely dominant throughout the tournament? Unfortunately we can only crown one winner and it’s all come down to this. Let’s find out!

[font size="6"]Championship: Kentucky Vs Florida[/font]

[font size="4"]Kentucky[/font]

So we’ve been talking a lot about the crazy policies that the state of Kentucky has had to endure under the wrath of the Koch Brothers. Let’s explore on that a bit further. We saw what happened in Wisconsin, West Virginia, and lots of other states with the teacher strikes and how that is playing out. But what about Kentucky – a state whose primary source of revenue is agriculture? How would their reckless financial policies translate to that market?

COX’S CREEK — At Warren and Donna Cheek’s dairy farm, the clock is ticking on their way of life.

If they can’t find a processor to buy the milk produced twice a day by their remaining 42 Holsteins, they face dumping the milk and flushing away a 69-year-old family dairy.

And if Warren Cheek had his way, he’d pass away before his herd beat him to the graveyard. “I always say, ‘I just hope to milk some morning and die' … (but) this could put us out of business.”

The Cheeks and 18 other dairy farmers in Kentucky were among more than 100 in Indiana, Pennsylvania, Tennessee and three other states who received certified letters from Dean Foods in late February informing them that their milk procurement contracts would be terminated by May 31.

The reason: Walmart no longer will buy Dean’s milk for its Great Value house brand, cutting the production needed at the Dean’s Louisville plant. Walmart has started its own production facility in Fort Wayne, Indiana.

And then remember all the hoopla surrounding Jesus loving psychopath Kim Davis and her challenger was a man that she had previous denied a marriage license to? Well, unfortunately this happened, and I am reminded that this is Kentucky.

MOREHEAD, Ky. (AP) — A gay man in eastern Kentucky has lost his bid to challenge Republican county clerk Kim Davis, who went to jail three years ago for denying him and others marriage licenses in the aftermath of an historic U.S. Supreme Court decision.

David Ermold sought the Democratic nomination in Tuesday’s primary in Rowan County, Kentucky. His quest to challenge the woman who said “God’s authority” prevented her from giving him a marriage license inspired thousands from at least 48 states to donate more than $200,000 to his campaign.

But it wasn’t enough to defeat Elwood Caudill Jr., a 20-year veteran of the Property Valuation Administrator’s office who works just across the hall from Davis. He ran a low-key campaign and has promised not to make gay marriage an issue in the general election.

“What happened in 2015 is in the past and just as my logo says, we’re just focused on the future,” Caudill said.

Ermold didn’t speak to news outlets Tuesday. He and his now-husband were one of several gay couples who tried to get licenses from Davis after the ruling. A video of the encounter was viewed more than 1.8 million times on YouTube.

Yeah so the bigots win again. But you know one thing – guns have been in the news a lot this week and Kentucky loves them some guns. The farmers are indeed packing some heat. But there’s an even seedier underbelly to Kentucky’s gun culture that you need to be made aware of.

It was lunchtime outside an outlet mall east of Louisville, Ky., when the deal was made for a gun that within weeks would be used to kill a 15-year-old boy in Chicago.

The 9 mm Taurus pistol was posted for sale on Armslist.com, a controversial website that helps buyers and sellers of weapons find each other without asking them to register or provide proof of identity or background checks, federal court records show.

Shortly before noon on March 16, 2017, the buyer arrived at the mall on Buck Creek Road in Simpsonville, Ky., in a white “American muscle car,” court records show. He told the seller his name was Christian Banks, handed over $300 cash for the compact black handgun and filled out a generic receipt, according to court records.

Just 42 days later, Xavier Soto was with a 16-year-old friend in an alley behind his home in the 4900 block of West George Street in Chicago’s gang-infested Belmont-Cragin neighborhood. A car pulled up and a gunman opened fire with the same Taurus pistol. Xavier was struck in the head and died two days later. His friend was shot multiple times but survived.

[font size="4"]Florida [/font]

So here we go it’s Florida’s turn! Florida has a long standing tradition of being America’s craziest state and last year they proved it when their star player Florida Man crashed into the glass performing an insane stunt and bled uncontrollably on the floor which got them an early exit from last year’s tournament. This year, they are angry and looking for redemption – they have fired all their coaches, changed leagues, and put Florida Man on the bench. Will it work for them? Well this is Florida we’re talking about here. So Florida’s main qualification for making the Gun Nut Conference was how poorly they handled the Parkland shooting. Well not even a month later, they have learned nothing!

PANAMA CITY, Fla. (AP) - A man suspected of trading wild bursts of gunfire with officers during a long standoff in the Florida Panhandle was found dead Tuesday in a gasoline-soaked apartment after an armored vehicle approached, authorities said.

“We were just blessed that we didn’t lose multiple officers and citizens today,” Bay County Sheriff Tommy Ford said at a news conference in Panama City, a small Gulf Coast city near the state’s famous sugar-sand beaches. He said a robot had to be deployed to check the apartment before officers could enter, finding the man dead.

No law enforcement agents were shot or wounded but one person leaving her apartment was injured and in stable condition, he said.

He described the dangerous situation that unfolded Tuesday in the tourist community as a “nightmare scenario for us,” with authorities estimating 100 rounds fired during the altercation. Ford said sporadic bursts of heavy gunfire had pinned several officers down at times as the suspected assailant fired from an elevated position with a rifle. Several law enforcement agents had surrounded the apartment building.


To paraphrase a quote from Homer Simpson, it appears that more and more Americans are viewing guns as the cause of and solution to all of life’s problems. I mean why get mad when you can just shoot someone or something? And then there were the zombies. Yes, zombies. In Florida. No you’re not imagining things.

Officials say they still don't who sent a "zombie alert" to residents of a Florida city following a power outage.

Lake Worth spokesman Ben Kerr says an independent investigation is underway to determine who was behind the message sent to some 7,880 customers during a 27-minute power outage Sunday.

During the city's own investigation, Kerr says officials determined that no current or former employees edited the pre-prepared message to include the warning of a zombie invasion.

He tells the Palm Beach Post that "no one was fired for it."

Ah great song! So yeah people in Florida apparently thought zombies were funny. I mean come on we’ve all seen The Walking Dead. But if there’s one take away from Florida is how poorly they handle shootings and just about everything else. I mean after all this is the state that attempted to construct a bridge only to have it collapse mere minutes after an inspection. So that’s Florida in a nutshell.

MIAMI (AP) — Federal investigators looking into the collapse of a pedestrian bridge in Florida that killed six people earlier this year confirmed Wednesday that they are focusing in part on the emergence of cracks in the structure before the accident.

The National Transportation Safety Board released a preliminary report light on details but that suggested investigators are focused on cracks in the south and north ends of the bridge near a Miami-area university campus.

The cracks were discovered in the days before the March 15 collapse, which killed a bridge worker and five people in vehicles crushed by the falling structure.

Photographs released by NTSB noted three cracks in the north end of the span, where crews were working on tensioning a structural component of the crossing when the failure occurred. A crew was on the bridge working on the diagonal beam at the time.

[font size="4"]And the winner is… [/font]

Oh my god this was one hell of a game but unfortunately only one team can be the winner. It was a solid first half with Florida pulling way ahead of Kentucky, but then Kentucky came back strong. And our winner is… Florida!!! You did it!!! Final score – 88 – 84! After last year’s humiliation Florida gets a shot at redemption and they are our 2018 Stupidest State!

[font size="6"]Statement From The Commissioner [/font]

Thank you! Thank you for attending. I’d like to thank Kentucky, Florida, and all of the teams for participating in this year’s Stupidest State contest! And it is my absolute honor to present Florida with our DeLay Trophy!

Both teams fought very hard and very well. I would also like to thank our governing body, the National For Fuck’s Sake Association, the NFFSA! You guys put on the best tournament possible, and all the host venues helped put on something magical. But this night belongs to Florida. They have towered over the competition to put an end to a stellar year. We hope you enjoyed this year’s Stupidest State contest and let’s make next year even better than this one! Let’s pop the champagne on this one!

[font size="6"]Net Cutting Ceremony [/font]

[font size="6"]Locker Room Celebration [/font]

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Panic! At The Disco[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen lets’ get this post season party started! My next guest has a new album coming out on June 22nd, and you can see them on tour everywhere this July and August with Arizona and Hayley Kiyoko. Their latest album is called “Pray For The Wicked”. Playing their song “Saturday Night (Say Amen)”, give it up for the one, the only Panic! At The Disco!

They want to stick around for one more? Sure!

I want to thank everyone for a great Top 10 season! I want to thank our audience. I want to thank my staff, the crew, all the venues who have hosted the World Tour 2018, and all the venues who hosted Stupidest State 2018. Not to mention all the great musical acts on the show from the Foo Fighters to Panic At The Disco. This is the end of Top 10 Conservative Idiots Season 4. Season 5 will begin on June 13th! We have some exciting changes coming for Season 5! See you in 3 weeks!


Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: City National Grove Of Anaheim, Anaheim, CA
Special Thanks To: City National Grove Management
Images: All images copyright belongs to respective copyright holders.
Videos: All videos copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Articles: All article content copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Writing: Top 10 Writing Department
Graphics: Top 10 Graphics Department
Research: Top 10 Research Department
Lighting & Stage Props: Top 10 Lighting Department
Legal: Top 10 Legal Department
Advertising: Top 10 Advertising Department
HR: Top 10 Human Resources Department
Initech’s Wardrobe Provided By: JAB Inc.
Wheel Of Corruption By: Studio 1 Stage Props, Burbank, CA
Panic At The Disco Appear Courtesy Of: Fueled By Ramen LLC
Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

May 16, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-18: Left Behind: Infinity War Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-18: Left Behind: Infinity War Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! You can save money by joining our new family plan – 4 lines for $109 a month! Switch now and save! OK so know it’s spring which means love is in the air which means that it’s prom season. We may have to do a deep dive on all the crazy shit that happens at school proms because in the day and age where the mere act of asking someone to the big dance requires a stadium scoreboard proposal and an elaborate choreographed dance number, we are bound to see some crazy shit happening. But let’s bring this story from where else our good friends in Florida, or America’s penis. There a Catholic high school in Miami – Christopher Columbus High School, held its’ annual prom, which featured, among other things, a real live tiger. Wait, what? And how were the people who were dancing around the cage failing to notice, I don’t know, a tiger? I mean please don’t tell me that Mike Tyson was involved. Or that they fed the tiger a steak full of roofies to get it to the car to take it back to Mike Tyson’s place. Oh shit I’m getting this story mixed up with one of my favorite comedies, The Hangover again. Wait, what? Yeah it’s Florida, I’m sure they could get roofies if they wanted to. But I’m sure getting the tiger back to the car involved something like this:

Shit, I got to stop getting this story mixed up with the Hangover again. I know it’s a high school prom, damn it! OK that’s enough of the intro. We got a lot of idiocy to get to this week but first we have to play Bill Maher’s brilliant New Rule from last Friday in which he says that the Trump administration isn’t a reality show – it’s a Scorsese movie:

Holy shit, I mean… yeah holy shit! What a week it’s been! In the number one and number 2 slots this week is of course President Donald Trump (1,2). It’s good to know that he has the best interests of America’s Christians at heart, and those interests include the Rapture. In the number 3 slot is Trump’s Company (3) which includes his lawyers Michael Cohen and Rudy Guiliani. Hey, we’re one Trump attorney away from an awkward sitcom! In the number 4 slot this week is the NRA (4). So new president Oliver North is hard at work accusing innocent mass shooting victims of being terrorists. Because victim blaming is what the NRA does best - it's your own damn fault you stood in the way of that bullet! In the number 5 slot this week is the GOP vs John McCain (5) so what do you do when one of your own is dying from a deadly brain disease? Pile salt on the wound! It’s the Trump way, damn it! In the number 6 slot this week is our weekly investigative piece Top 10 Investigates and this week we’re going to take a look at the controversial Incel movement and what we can do about it. In the number 7 slot this week is of course our weekly sermon of all things holy, Holy Shit, and this week we’re going to do something different. We’re going to combine it with “This Fucking Guy” and profile Trump’s resident pastor Robert Jeffress. Whew, he is another crazy pick from the Trump admin. In the number 8 slot is Alex Jones (8) and it appears he and his partner in crime Jerome Corsi have finally thrown in the towel on 4chan’s Qanon. In the number 9 (NEIN!!!) slot this week we’ve got a new installment of “I Need A Drink” and we’re going to get drunk and do something that we Americans should have been doing a long time ago – bet on sports! Finally this week it’s the penultimate round of our Stupidest State Contest and this time we’re live from a venue that has hosted a great many Final Fours – the Fabulous Forum in Inglewood, California! This time it’s a double matchup as Kentucky takes on Wisconsin for the Flyover League Championship, while Florida takes on Missouri for the Layover League Championship! Plus closing things out this week, we’ve got some live music for you from Post Malone! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font]

Hey everyone guess what? We’re all gonna get raptured! Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Woooooooooooooo! Woooo! Woo. Ok maybe it’s not at all as exciting as it’s made out to be since a whole lot of us are probably gonna die in a nuclear holocaust, and relatively soon. At least the doomsday preppers can say “I told you so!”. Followed by a very childish “neener neener!”. So for the sake of this piece, let’s call it “Left Behind: The Real Life Interactive Version”. Or to use something that might be more popular with the kids these days: “Left Behind: Infinity War”. Yes I’m crossing two franchises here – one has a really bizarre doomsday scenario in which half of the population gets snapped up by a crazy wannnabe god bent on controlling the universe, and the other one has Iron Man.

See you next week! What? We still have the full hour left? And Post Malone is backstage? OK. I definitely wouldn’t want to leave Post Malone hanging. So how are we going to get left behind this week?

The US officially relocated its Embassy to Jerusalem on Monday, formally upending decades of American foreign policy in a move that was met with clashes and protests along the Israeli-Gaza border.

At least 43 Palestinians were killed in Gaza as deadly protests took place ahead of and during the ceremony in Jerusalem — making it the deadliest day there since the 2014 Gaza war.

President Donald Trump did not attend the ceremony in Jerusalem's Arnona neighborhood, but in a video message broadcast at the event he congratulated Israel, saying the opening had been "a long time coming."

"Today, Jerusalem is the seam of Israel's government. It is the home of the Israeli legislature and the Israeli supreme court and Israel's prime minister and president. Israel is a sovereign nation with the right like every other sovereign nation to determine its own capital, yet for many years, we failed to acknowledge the obvious, the plain reality that Israel's capital is Jerusalem," Trump said in the pre-recorded remarks.

It’s good to know that today’s lunatic fringe Christians plan to create a literal version of hell on earth! I will take that one, thank you! So this weekend – the week after the Kentucky Derby – Trump managed to create a trifecta of pissing off three countries at once! And those countries are Isreal, Syria, and Palestine – countries whose bad side you do not want to get on! So how did Palestine mark this momentous occasion?

The US officially relocated its Embassy to Jerusalem on Monday, formally upending decades of American foreign policy in a move that was met with clashes and protests along the Israeli-Gaza border.

At least 43 Palestinians were killed in Gaza as deadly protests took place ahead of and during the ceremony in Jerusalem — making it the deadliest day there since the 2014 Gaza war.

President Donald Trump did not attend the ceremony in Jerusalem's Arnona neighborhood, but in a video message broadcast at the event he congratulated Israel, saying the opening had been "a long time coming."

So of course while patting himself on the back for a job well done of pissing off half the world while pleasing his “base”, Donald Trump seems to forget that he’s going to get a whole lot of people killed in the process. There goes that Nobel Peace Prize!

Israel is bracing for a tense week as the U.S. Embassy officially opens in Jerusalem on Monday — a move that has triggered fierce protests by Palestinians. Protests turned violent in Gaza, where dozens of Palestinians were killed by Israeli soldiers in clashes along the border fence on Monday, according to the Health Ministry in Gaza, making it the bloodiest day of demonstrations in the past six weeks of protests.

Overall, over 80 Palestinians have been killed by Israeli soldiers and more than 3,000 have been injured since the embassy move was announced by President Trump in early December.

Observers of the conflict had already predicted the tensions when Trump recognized Jerusalem as Israel’s capital and announced the move. At the time, the decision was branded “dangerous,” “catastrophic,” “irresponsible” and being “against international law” by countries usually considered U.S. allies, including France, Germany and Saudi Arabia.

Here’s a short recap of how we got to this point, which helps make clear why most other foreign governments are opposed to the embassy move.

You know it’s a policy here not to joke about tragedy. But when the guy who you currently call “president” is a walking tragedy and everything he touches turns to shit, exceptions have to be made, damn it! It’s good to know Trump has some company in high places because when the rapture does happen, he’s going to need to seek shelter fast!

The U.S. today officially opened its new embassy in Jerusalem amid massive protests by Palestinians.

The move comes five months after President Donald Trump made his blockbuster announcement in December that the U.S. embassy would shift from Tel Aviv to Jerusalem.

The new diplomatic office, in what was an existing U.S. consular building, was opened in a ceremony led by U.S. Ambassador to Israel David Friedman and attended by Israeli and American officials.

The day has also been marked by violence, with dozens of Palestinians killed by Israeli military forces and more than 1,600 injured in protests at the Gaza border against the embassy move, according to the Gaza Ministry of Health.


And those men are currently running the show! And when this gets written up 50 years after nuclear Armageddon happens, assuming there’s something left of humanity, historians are not going to be surprised how we get to this point. I mean with friends like these, who needs enemies?

President Trump delivered recorded remarks Monday at the opening of the new U.S. Embassy in Jerusalem.

"Congratulations, it's been a long time coming," Trump said in a video played at the ceremony.

"This city and this entire nation is a testament to the unbreakable spirit of the Jewish people," he said. "The United States will always be a great friend of Israel."

The president went on to express his hope for peace in the region in the video message.

"We extend a hand in friendship to Israel, to Palestinians and to all of their neighbors. May there be peace. May God bless this embassy. May God bless all who serve there, and may God bless the United States of America," Trump said.

So the answer to world peace is… more war? How does that… oh fuck, it’s the Trump administration we’re talking about here! Attempting to question their logic could make one’s head explode! But it’s good to know those who fantasize about the apocalypse might actually get a chance to see it played out in real life. They do know Left Behind is fiction, right?

More than 20 people in Gaza were dead on Monday before anyone in Washington had had their breakfast. This was pitched to the awakening nation as a series of “deadly clashes,” even though the deadly part only applied to one side. It was a great start to a day in which the president*, who doesn’t know anything about anything, prepared to toss a lighted match into a lagoon of gasoline in the Middle East.

The decision to move the American embassy in Israel to Jerusalem is more unnecessary than it is stupid and dangerous, and it’s pretty stupid and dangerous. There was no overwhelming political support—and certainly no overwhelming political pressure—in this country for such a provocative development. It was solely the desire of that odd mixture of highly conservative Judaism and American splinter Protestantism, of the prolonged slow-dance between the apocalyptic factions of two major monotheisms that very likely will incite the apocalyptic faction of the third. It is religious extremism disguised as international diplomacy.

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font]

This week Trump made his case for the Nobel Peace Prize by bringing the whole world a step closer to nuclear Armageddon. I mean come on, how is Fox News supposed to run the country when they seem to have thrown the whole world into chaos? We all know that Fox News speaks to President Orange Douche directly. So while he was busy turning Isreal – Palestine relationships upside down, he had some other evil tricks up his sleeve this week.

President Trump early Monday promoted Fox News’s coverage of the U.S. Embassy opening in Jerusalem.

“U.S. Embassy opening in Jerusalem will be covered live on @FoxNews & @FoxBusiness. Lead up to 9:00 A.M. (eastern) event has already begun," the president wrote on Twitter.

"A great day for Israel!” he added.

Trump has previously promoted Fox News and its coverage on Twitter while criticizing negative coverage from other outlets and labeling them "fake news."

Trump announced last year that he would move the U.S. Embassy from Tel Aviv to the holy city, a decision that caused criticism and concern from leaders across the globe. Palestinians hope to make a portion East Jerusalem, captured by Israel in the 1967 Six-Day War, the capital of an independent state.

So the way Trump appeals to his base is to tweet something that Fox news said, then it shows up a few minutes later immediately on… Fox News. it’s a bullshit to bullshit pipeline. Now addiction is something that no one should ever joke about. But what we are going to do is point out some of the obvious warning signs of addiction and then ask – is the guy who we call president an addict? The first sign is that you’re a danger to yourself or others.

There are two Mueller probes. There’s the one that exists in the Fox News-addled mind of President Trump and his supporters, which features dark conspiracy-mongering about a “Deep State coup” against Trump; out-of-control federal agents jackbooting poor, hapless Trump allies; and, of course, the corrupt failure to prosecute Hillary Clinton. Then there’s the one that exists in most mainstream news accounts, which features a team of investigators mostly going by the book, never leaking, methodically following the facts, albeit very aggressively, wherever they will lead.

The gaping disconnect between these two Mueller probes is driven home by two new pieces: one from New York magazine, which reports alarming new details about Trump’s addiction to Fox News and how that has shaped his perception of the Mueller investigation; and one from The Post, which paints a detailed picture of how the probe has actually been operating day in and day out.

The New York magazine piece reports that former White House advisers Sean Spicer and Reince Priebus sought to deliberately drive Trump deeper into the Fox News bubble, because he was getting overly agitated by criticism on MSNBC and CNN. They did this by talking up Fox’s high ratings and importance to Trump’s base until Trump’s television diet became, as one former official put it, “mainly a complete dosage of Fox.”

Complete dosage of Fox… that sounds like the worst kind of dosage ever by the way. The second is that his addiction completely overpowers his thought process. He can’t stand it to go 5 minutes without his vice!

Trump and Hannity don’t usually speak in the morning, which the president spends alone, watching TV and tweeting. During the first months of the administration in particular, the tweets launched at the beginning of the day landed like bitchy little grenades directed at the programming and personalities that angered him on MSNBC and CNN. “Early on, usually we could count on the president watching Morning Joe first thing, at 6 a.m.,” one White House official told me. “He’d watch an hour of that. Then he’d move on to New Day for a segment or two. Then he’d move on to Fox.”

Senior staffers worried about this pattern of behavior: By the time his day was formally under way with the daily intelligence briefing in the Oval Office — scheduled as late as 11 a.m. — the whole world was often thrown off course, wondering whether there were “tapes” of his conversations with a fired FBI director (May 12, 2017, 8:26 a.m.) or if a TV host had been “bleeding badly from a face-lift” at Mar-a-Lago (June 29, 2017, 8:58 a.m.).

With the hope of calming him down, then–chief of staff Reince Priebus and then–press secretary Sean Spicer began a subtle campaign. “It got to the point that they were just like, ‘We need to get him off these channels and onto Fox & Friends or else we’re going to be chasing down this crazy-train bullshit from MSNBC and CNN all day,’ ” one former White House official said.

Did you catch the other sign of his addiction there? Surrounding himself with his enablers – and no one is more of an enabler of Trump than Sean Hannity is. No matter what Hannity is talking about that night, it sets Trump off! But another sign of addiction is that Trump has increased his tolerance for bullshit, like that’s possible!

Donald J. Trump is an experiment in real time, but with no control group. His surreal tenure is an attempt to answer the question: What if we elected someone who does not read and gets all his information from cable news? This is not an exaggeration of any kind. A piece from Olivia Nuzzi, published in New York magazine late Sunday, says once more—this time for the people in the back of the room—that we have elected Fox News Grandpa as President of the United States.

The story's primary concern is Trump's cozy relationship with Sean Hannity, Fox's chief blowhard correspondent. But it also shows just how much Trump behaves like a typical Fox News viewer: He consumes far too much of it every day and far too little of anything else. He lacks reference points for what is happening in the world outside a closed information system tailored to a particular ideological agenda.

There is, for instance, a remarkable story about Trump's shifting viewing habits. He went from watching a number of cable news shows during Executive Time each morning to just Fox & Friends, which he now live-tweets—often using the text of on-screen chyrons verbatim, or misquoting the hosts:

The other sign that Trump may have is his increased paranoia, and lately it’s begun to border on the extreme side. Think of it like a really fucked up season of 24 where the bad guy is in charge and CTU is controlled by what Keifer reacts to on television. Hey that’s meta. This also goes back into being a danger to himself and to others. Since Trump is an addict, maybe it’s time to get him into rehab, perhaps?

CNN's Brian Stelter said on Sunday that President Trump's "addiction" to Fox News leads to impulsive actions and other consequences.

"The line where Fox News ends and where Trump begins is getting blurrier by the day," he said on CNN's "Reliable Sources."

Stelter said there is a lack of quality information reaching the president, so he relies instead on reporters at Fox News.

"Sometimes via TV, sometimes on the phone, sometimes in person," he said.

"His addiction to Fox and to other pro-Trump commentators leads to impulsive actions."

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[font size="8"]Trump’s Company
[br] [/font]

Come and knock on our door, come and knock on our door… it’s Trump’s company too! So Trump has a threesome of his own that he needs to worry about. Oh come on don’t boo that! Really? We’ve seen a lot of disturbing shit with this president and that’s where you draw the line? Ok fine. I’m of course talking about the tryst between Trump and his current lawyer Rudy Giuliani, and his former lawyer Michael Cohen. So what is the latest news?

When Donald Trump won the presidency, his longtime attorney Michael Cohen seemed in position for a coveted spot in the senior ranks of the White House.

At one point, Cohen topped a list of five candidates for White House counsel, according to documents reviewed by The Washington Post. He suggested to some Trump allies that he might make a good chief of staff.

But when Trump built his West Wing team, the brash New York lawyer did not make the cut.

Some in Trump's inner circle worried about blowback from Cohen's associations and unorthodox tactics in fixing the New York developer's problems, Trump associates said.

Among those opposed, the associates said, were Trump's daughter Ivanka and son-in-law, Jared Kushner. For his part, Cohen had warned Trump against giving Ivanka Trump and Kushner White House jobs, saying the president would be hammered by complaints of nepotism, according to two people familiar with the matter.

Yes why???? So if you’re keeping score at home Trump’s mob lawyer Michael Cohen is his fixer, and his fixer is in some deep shit. But here’s the thing – in the mob you always need a fall guy and there’s no perfect fall guy than Michael Cohen:

First, Michael Cohen is obviously in significant legal jeopardy.

Second, it's not at all obvious that President Donald Trump is as well, contrary to the popular narrative that this is the "beginning of the end" for this administration. I have no such confidence.

The problem is that it's extremely difficult to imagine what "significant legal jeopardy" would even mean for Donald Trump; for the moment, his party controls both houses of Congress, and he controls his party.

Even in the event that meaningful malfeasance is brought to light, I am not entirely certain under what circumstances the party would condemn him for it. And the Cohen case, for all the hoopla surrounding it, is not clearly and directly connected with the president to the degree that I would be confident saying it could bring him down, any more than Whitewater brought down former President Bill Clinton.

Now let’s flip the script and talk about the flip side of Trump’s mob business – and that’s his new (old?) lawyer Rudy Giuliani. Of course you know anything tied to Trump has to be shady and there’s no one in the mob who’s shadier and scarier than Giuliani.

President Donald Trump's new attorney, Rudy Giuliani, said Sunday that he can't rule out the possibility of his client's invoking his Fifth Amendment right against self-incrimination in the Russia investigation — and that Trump wouldn't have to comply with a subpoena to testify.

"He's the president of the United States. We can assert the same privileges other presidents have," Giuliani said Sunday morning on ABC's "This Week." He added that "we don't have to" comply if Trump is subpoenaed by the special counsel to testify.

Giuliani told NBC News' Peter Alexander on Sunday night that it was less and less likely that Trump would speak with special counsel Robert Mueller in his investigation of Russian interference in the 2016 presidential election. He said Mueller and his investigators were being "heavy-handed" and were "setting the president up for perjury."

Referring to Martha Stewart's conviction for lying to investigators in an insider trading case in 2004, Giuliani said on ABC News: "They don't have a case on collusion. They don't have obstruction. ... I'm going to walk him into a prosecution for perjury like Martha Stewart did?"

So now Trump goes from one lawyer who’s a liar and a fraud to another lawyer who is a liar and a fraud. That’s so meta! And of course you know Trump’s attorneys have their own attorneys! As I keep saying it’s attorney-ception – it’s a trial within a trial within a trial! Where does it begin and where does it end? I hope it doesn’t end with what we were talking about earlier!

The investigation of Russian interference in the 2016 election, which hits its one-year mark Thursday, has formed the cloudy backdrop of Donald Trump's presidency — a rolling fog of controversy, much of it self-inflicted, that is a near-constant distraction for the commander in chief.

The Mueller operation, like the former Marine Corps platoon commander who leads it, is secretive and methodical. Ten blocks west in the White House, President Trump combats the probe with bluster, disarray and defiance as he scrambles for survival.

The president vents to associates about the FBI raids on his personal attorney Michael Cohen — as often as "20 times a day," in the estimation of one confidant — and they frequently listen in silence, knowing little they say will soothe him. Trump gripes that he needs better "TV lawyers" to defend him on cable news and is impatient to halt the "witch hunt" that he believes undermines his legitimacy as president. And he plots his battle plans with former New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani, his new legal consigliere.

"We're on the same wavelength," Giuliani said. "We've gone from defense to offense."

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[font size="8"]Oliver North
[br] [/font]

The republicans always have a way of picking the best people don’t they? Why yes I do believe that was part of Trump’s campaign, sir! “I pick the best people, OK!”. Well the NRA definitely found the right man for the job in Oliver North, who was recently picked to replace outgoing president Wayne La Pierre. And when you’re under investigation for having ties to a hostile foreign entity, maybe you don’t pick a guy who sold weapons to a hostile foreign entity. Or do you?

The National Rifle Association’s new president, Oliver North — a man who, during the Reagan administration, played a central role in the Iran-Contra scandal and admitted he lied to Congress — has appeared on Fox News two times in as many days to accuse Iran of being a nation of deceivers.

“Never believe an Iranian — because if their lips are moving, they’re lying,” North told Fox News host Sean Hannity on Wednesday night while discussing the rockets that Israel has accused Iran of firing at their territory from Syria.

The day before, North had repeated that phrase, almost verbatim, while discussing the Iran nuclear deal on “Fox & Friends” in the hours before Trump announced America’s withdrawal from the accord.

“The Iranians have been lying. Every time their lips move, they’re lying,” North said, suggesting that Iran had not abandoned its nuclear ambitions despite the agreement.

He added that Trump should sanction anyone who does business with Iran going forward. “If we sanction [Iran] again, we ought to sanction anybody else who does business with them,” North said. “That’ll stop the Euros from helping to bail them out while they cheat on this program.”

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Now just remember that to be high up in the GOP in 2018 you have to have Fox News and Infowars on 24/7 and spout the most batshit crazy bullshit you could ever think possible, which makes Mr. North the right guy for the job! And the other thing you have to do is make yourself a victim, something white male conservative snowflakes know all too well!

Todd Starnes spoke with Lt. Col. Oliver North, who has recently been named the President of the National Rifle Association. Stares asked Lt. Col North about why he accepted the position and also about the attacks the NRA is facing from anti-gun forces.

Lt. Col. North said, "What we're facing is a frontal assault that uses every lever of power against the NRA. They're using legal attacks. They're using cyberattacks. They're using intimidation and threats and harassment. It's pretty clear to me this is a psychological warfare operation that's being waged."

I know it’s a Fox News link but there’s no one who would know the concept of psychological warfare better than a guy who is one of the world’s most famous weapons traffickers! And speaking of playing the victim, Mr. North has stooped to the unbelievable low of calling victims of a mass shooting “terrorists”. Ah, who am I kidding? Of course it’s believable! I know what year this is!

The newly elected president of the National Rifle Association has claimed that gun control activists, like those who have emerged following a deadly shooting at a high school in Parkland, Florida, in February, are “civil terrorists.”

Oliver North, who is best known for his role in the Iran-Contra scandal in which profits from weapons sales to Iran were secretly funneled to right-wing guerrillas in Nicaragua, was named the lobbying group’s new president earlier this week. And he has wasted no time attacking activists who have criticized the NRA’s role in continued gun violence.

“They’re not activists—this is civil terrorism. This is the kind of thing that’s never been seen against a civil rights organization in America,” Oliver North told the Washington Times. “You go back to the terrible days of Jim Crow and those kinds of things—even there you didn’t have this kind of thing.”

In referencing Jim Crow, North appeared to be comparing the plight of the NRA with civil rights activists who fought for racial equality in the 1960s, during a time in which many were beaten and murdered. North said NRA leaders had been subjected to personal “threats.”

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! If you think that’s bad, wait until you see the next entry! But at least the parents and Parkland students are, for lack of a better phrase, firing back at the NRA and their evil bullshit:

A Parkland father slammed the newly elected leader of the National Rifle Association for equating gun control activists with "criminal civil terrorists," describing the remark to Newsweek as "hurtful" and hypocritical.

Fred Guttenberg, who has become a prominent gun control activist since his daughter Jaime was shot and killed at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School on February 14, was responding to comments Oliver North made in an interview published Wednesday by The Washington Times.

“They’re not activists—this is civil terrorism," North told the conservative-leaning paper. "This is the kind of thing that’s never been seen against a civil rights organization in America. You go back to the terrible days of Jim Crow and those kinds of things—even there you didn’t have this kind of thing.”

North was seemingly equating the attacks against NRA members—including vandalism and receiving personal threats—with the plight of people fighting for racial equality in the 1960s, some of whom were beaten and murdered.

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[font size="8"] The GOP
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One of the most prolific senators of the last 50 years and a guy who once ran for president a long time ago is dying an absolutely horrible death, if you haven’t noticed. I’m of course talking about John McCain, who is suffering from one of the worst types of cancers you could possibly have. But before Mr. McCain dies from this terrible disease, it’s good to know that he’s got friends in high places. Or is it low places? I forget how that song goes. Thank you sir! I mean there’s no one who knows the concept of dignity more than the GOP does!

Despite battling brain cancer with a dire prognosis, Sen. John McCain is not being treated with much respect by some of his political opponents.

A White House official mocked Sen. John McCain, R-Ariz., and his battle with the deadly disease during a meeting Thursday, The Hill reported. And earlier a guest on Fox News Business implied that McCain betrayed U.S. secrets when he was tortured as a prisoner of war.

"It doesn't matter, he's dying anyway," press aide Kelly Sadler said about McCain's opposition to CIA nominee Gina Haspel at a meeting of White House communications staffers, according to an unnamed source cited by The Hill's Jordan Fabian.

On Wednesday, McCain urged his fellow senators to reject Haspel's nomination because he does not believe she adequately answered for her role in the CIA's torture program after the 9/11 attacks during a hearing before the Senate Intelligence Committee.

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Stay classy guys. Yeah just like Ron Burgundy would say. I think we all are dying anyways, and I know I definitely died a little inside when I heard how cruel the Trump humpers are. But even those in his own party are debunking this nonsense especially when it comes to their president!

Republican senators are demanding a public apology after a White House staffer joked about Sen. John McCain's (R-Ariz.) failing health, even as the administration is doubling down on its decision to handle the fallout "internally."

The growing divisions between the Senate GOP caucus and the White House comes on the eve of a closed-door Tuesday lunch between President Trump and Senate Republicans.

Sen. John Cornyn (Texas), the No. 2 Senate Republican, said on Monday that an apology would be "appropriate ... from the person who said that really dumb thing."

Sen. John Kennedy (R-La.) called staffer Kelly Sadler’s comments "stupid" and "a big mistake."

"I think the administration should apologize, but I think Mrs. Sadler ... I think she should apologize publicly as well," Kennedy separately told CBS News.

Really so you helped elect the most boorish, insensitive jackass who’s ever attempted to call himself a leader, and that’s where you draw the line? OK. It’s good to know that the GOP does have its’ limits when it comes to what’s tasteful and what isn’t. For the record they consider Trump’s pee tape with porn stars tasteful. But anything Bill Clinton does isn’t.

Senate Republicans are openly seething over the White House’s treatment of John McCain, casting a pall over the party ahead of a rare lunch with President Donald Trump the caucus is hosting on Tuesday.

The White House’s refusal to apologize for an aide joking about the Arizona senator’s failing health is threatening to undermine what should be a feel-good moment for the caucus.

“Just out of common decency they should apologize. And the person who said it should apologize. It’s wrong,” said Sen. Rob Portman (R-Ohio).

With a potential deal with North Korea in the works, the economy humming and Trump following through on his vow to pull out of the Iran nuclear deal, Republicans were feeling more upbeat about the administration than they had in months. But the morbid joke by communications aide Kelly Sadler last week, delivered at a staff meeting and promptly leaked to the press, made them wonder when the administration is going to start treating McCain with more respect.

To which we say – good luck with that, sir. This is the Trump administration we are talking about here, they apologize for nothing! But as I said even the most indecent political party in human history at least has its’ limits when it comes to human decency, if that’s a stretch! And the other thing guys, when you’re in a hole, stop digging! I mean its’ kind of good the Trump White House isn’t apologizing, this might be one instance where silence is better than attempting a half assed apology.

Several senior Senate Republicans -- including key members of leadership -- criticized the White House's handling of an impolitic comment made last week by a junior aide about Sen. John McCain "dying" and the administration's refusal to apologize and move on.
"I think an apology is appropriate," Sen. John Cornyn of Texas said firmly.

When asked from who, Cornyn said, "From the person who said that really dumb thing."
Cornyn said he would have preferred the White House already put to rest the story, now five days old, which has pitted Trump officials against one of the most revered members of the Senate who is battling an aggressive form of brain cancer.

Despite his illness, the Arizona Republican has remained a vocal and active critic of Trump's, which may explain why the White House is reluctant to make peace.

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[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Involuntarily Celibate
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It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates.

Last month, a terrorist attack happened in Toronto that killed 10 and wounded 15 when a van rammed into a crowd of pedestrians. But now shocking revelations have been made about the toxic, male centric culture that Toronto attacker Alex Minassian was a part of. They call themselves “Involuntarily Celebate”, or shorthand “Incel”. The Incel movement was originally an underground movement consisting of a group of men in online circles who were part of the racist and sexist alt right movement, but with an even more dangerous twist – they claimed women owed them for sex.

A profile on social networking site LinkedIn identifies Minassian as attending Seneca College in suburban North York from 2011-2018. Neighbours told CBC News that he lived with his father.

Speculation surfaced Monday night around a Facebook post associated with the same name and photo as appear on Minassian's LinkedIn site.

Facebook told CBC News that the post from an Alek Minassian was real and was posted publicly on his profile before Facebook shut it down.

The post referred to the "Supreme Gentleman Elliot Rodger." Rodger was the 22-year-old California man responsible for a deadly rampage in Isla Vista, Calif., that left six people dead and a dozen people wounded.

In a video posted ahead of that 2014 attack, Rodger raged about a number of women turning down his advances, rendering men like him "incels," a term used by some groups to mean "involuntarily celibate."

Rodger referred to men who were successful with women as "Chads" and women who turned men down as "Stacys."

Yes holy shit indeed. So what is an Incel? The term means “involuntarily celebate” but what does that imply? Well it implies that they hate women for not performing sexual acts with them. So explain this one, how does hating women expect to land you a girlfriend?

What are we to make of “incels,” the oddball community of frustrated guys who go online to complain about how they can’t find women who want to have sex with them?

Gee, I wonder why?

There’s room for all sorts of opinions on the web, I like to think. But this one has turned deadly. An incel, which stands for “involuntary celibate,” is blamed for driving a rented van that jumped the sidewalk and plowed into pedestrians on a Toronto street on April 23.

Police charged Alek Minassian, 25, of Toronto with killing 10 people and injuring 15, most of whom were women. Before the attack, authorities say, he posted a message on his Facebook page to announce his incel ties.

“The Incel Rebellion has already begun!” it said in part. “We will overthrow all the Chads and Stacys! All hail the Supreme Gentleman Elliot Rodger!”

But there’s more to this. They’re not just a bunch of creepy perverts hanging out online. They seem to have a love of some dark and twisted shit. For instance – their love of serial killers and terrorists isn’t exactly anything new but definitely creepy.

That’s incel-speak. “Chads” in their world are guys who are cool and good-looking enough to attract what incels feel unfairly denied, sex with attractive and sexually active “Stacys.” “Supreme gentleman” and “perfect guy” is how Elliot Rodger, perversely an incel patron saint, described himself in a lengthy manifesto before he killed six people and injured 14 others in a 2014 shooting rampage in Santa Barbara, Calif.

He wrote a manifesto blaming women for his loneliness and the fact that he was still a virgin. “I’m the perfect guy and yet you throw yourselves at these obnoxious men instead of me, the supreme gentleman,” he wrote.

Now, that sad, delusional loner appears to have posthumously inspired his own sick, posthumous personality cult — and at least one copycat, Minassian.

Other mass murderers are treated like heroes in the looniest incel chatter. “Going Sodini,” for example, refers to George Sodini, 48, who opened fire in a women’s dance class at an LA Fitness gym near Pittsburgh, killing four — including himself — and wounding nine others

And that can’t be good for anybody. But Incels aren’t just looking for sex. They are looking for conservative white supremacy. Supremacy of anything is never a good thing, but these men are proud of being males and they won’t accept the fact that someone might be better than them.

These days, in this country, sex has become a hyper-efficient and deregulated marketplace, and, like any hyper-efficient and deregulated marketplace, it often makes people feel very bad. Our newest sex technologies, such as Tinder and Grindr, are built to carefully match people by looks above all else. Sexual value continues to accrue to abled over disabled, cis over trans, thin over fat, tall over short, white over nonwhite, rich over poor. There is an absurd mismatch in the way that straight men and women are taught to respond to these circumstances. Women are socialized from childhood to blame themselves if they feel undesirable, to believe that they will be unacceptable unless they spend time and money and mental effort being pretty and amenable and appealing to men. Conventional femininity teaches women to be good partners to men as a basic moral requirement: a woman should provide her man a support system, and be an ideal accessory for him, and it is her job to convince him, and the world, that she is good.

Men, like women, blame women if they feel undesirable. And, as women gain the economic and cultural power that allows them to be choosy about their partners, men have generated ideas about self-improvement that are sometimes inextricable from violent rage.

Several distinct cultural changes have created a situation in which many men who hate women do not have the access to women’s bodies that they would have had in an earlier era. The sexual revolution urged women to seek liberation. The self-esteem movement taught women that they were valuable beyond what convention might dictate. The rise of mainstream feminism gave women certainty and company in these convictions. And the Internet-enabled efficiency of today’s sexual marketplace allowed people to find potential sexual partners with a minimum of barriers and restraints. Most American women now grow up understanding that they can and should choose who they want to have sex with.

Apparently no one loved them enough when they were little otherwise they wouldn’t think they are the superior specimen. That is it this week for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

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[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Gather around my fair brothers and sisters, it’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it’s time for our weekly duty to remind you that the holiest among us are the most full of:

How great is the Top 10 gospel choir? Let’s give it up for them! Can I get a hallelujah? So the Christian right seems hell bent on bringing about Armageddon and they are doing so at what seems like a rabbits’ pace since the election of the Dark One. Now the Dark One opened the new American embassy in Jerusalem last week and this is the man who they have chosen to lead the services:

A Dallas evangelical pastor who once said that Jewish people are going to hell and a megachurch televangelist who claimed that Hitler was part of God’s plan to return Jews to Israel both played prominent roles on Monday in the opening ceremony of the new American Embassy in Jerusalem.

Robert Jeffress, who spoke at President Trump’s private inaugural prayer service and is the pastor of First Baptist Church in Dallas, delivered a prayer at the opening ceremony on Monday, while the Rev. John C. Hagee, a televangelist who founded Christians United for Israel and leads a San Antonio megachurch, gave the closing benediction.

Despite their comments about Jewish people, the two pastors are among the leading pro-Israel voices in the evangelical Christian world. Some evangelicals believe that American foreign policy should support Israel to help fulfill biblical prophecies about the second coming of Christ.

The decision by Mr. Trump to move the embassy from Tel Aviv fulfilled a major campaign promise and handed a victory to hard-line pro-Israel Americans, as well as conservative and evangelical Christians who have long wanted the United States’ diplomatic home to be in Jerusalem.

Well there may not be a tomorrow if this keeps unfolding the way it is unfolding! But of course leave it to Trump to get the biggest bigots, the worst kinds of pastors to lead the opening prayers at the embassy of Jerusalem. RIP separation of church and state by the way, you will be missed!

Southern Baptist pastor Robert Jeffress spoke at the opening of the U.S. Embassy in Jerusalem May 14. Here's a look at some of his controversial statements. (Elyse Samuels/The Washington Post)

Well before he was asked to offer a prayer at Monday’s ceremony marking the U.S. Embassy’s move from Tel Aviv to Jerusalem, earning the enmity of Mitt Romney, Pastor Robert Jeffress offered tangential insight into why he and many evangelicals think the move was so important.

“Jerusalem has been the object of the affection of both Jews and Christians down through history and the touchstone of prophecy,” Jeffress told CNN last year. “But, most importantly, God gave Jerusalem — and the rest of the Holy Land — to the Jewish people.”

The latter half of that quote hints at the deep religious meaning of the existence of Israel for Jeffress and other Christians. As University of North Texas professor Elizabeth Oldmixon told Vox last year, the issue of recognizing Jerusalem is inextricable from that belief.

“The tenet of Christian Zionism is that God’s promise of the Holy Land to the Jews is eternal. It’s not just something in antiquity,” Oldmixon said. “When we talk about the Holy Land, God’s promise of the Holy Land, we’re talking about real estate on both sides of the Jordan River. So the sense of a greater Israel and expansionism is really important to this community. Jerusalem is just central to that. It’s viewed as a historical and biblical capital.”

You know having Pastor Jeffress speaking in Jerusalem, you might as well just skip a step and invite Hitler and Satan themselves!!! For Pastor Jeffress has committed the sin of blasphemy, and it is one of the most egregious of SINS!!!! Because in our good book that is something that in the eyes of the good LAWRD JAYSUS would not have wanted! Because JAYSUS said “the dark one shall pose as a creature of light”. And there shall be no darker one than that of Donald J. Trump!!!

Radical anti-LGBTQ activist Scott Lively appeared on the “Point Of View” radio program yesterday to discuss his campaign for governor in Massachusetts, during which he claimed to have received “spiritual confirmation” that President Trump has been transformed “into a man of God” and urged Christians to model themselves after Trump.

Lively has made his support for Trump a centerpiece of his campaign, declaring that Trump is a political genius and “God’s man” and pledging to be “the most pro-Trump governor in America,” and he reiterated that position during yesterday’s interview.

“I’m a strong supporter of President Trump,” Lively said. “I believe he was transformed from a somewhat reprobate New York liberal into a man of God, God’s man in the White House today. I saw the transformation myself—I had a spiritual confirmation, sort of an endorsement of the idea. He has shown the example of speaking boldly and not being intimidated and not backing down on the things that are important and essential.”

Evangelicals, Lively asserted, can make America great again “if Christians would simply follow that model.”

I think even somewhere Jesus right now is going "do not want". Thank you! But these are the kinds of folks we’re dealing with here. Dark ones posing as creatures of light! And there be no darker one than the evangelical who supports this DAYMON!!!! I don’t know about you – but I would much prefer a church that teaches that humanity can do good, rather than one that brings about the end of times!!!!

One of President Trump's closest evangelical advisers gave the prayer Monday at the opening of the new U.S. Embassy in Jerusalem. But Robert Jeffress's past comments about other faiths, including Judaism, followed him to the event.

Jeffress, pastor of First Baptist Church in Dallas, a Southern Baptist megachurch in Texas, regularly talks about the significance of Jerusalem to conservative Christians — a major component of Trump’s base of supporters.

Long before Jeffress began defending Trump on cable news, he made headlines for attacking other Americans whose faith is different from his own — something former GOP presidential nominee Mitt Romney noted Sunday on Twitter.

“Robert Jeffress says 'you can’t be saved by being a Jew,' and 'Mormonism is a heresy from the pit of hell.' He’s said the same about Islam. Such a religious bigot should not be giving the prayer that opens the United States Embassy in Jerusalem,” tweeted Romney, a candidate for the Senate in Utah and a Mormon.

And yes I’m afraid it may come to that, because we need to cleanse our planet of these fools, liars and hypocrites!!! Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Alex Jones
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If you’ve been reading the political Twittersphere, and why wouldn’t you? Since the guy who we call “president” spends most of his early AM attempting to take a shit while angrily tweeting about whatever bullshit he might have seen on Fox & Friends, or on Sean Hannity the previous night. I’ll leave you with that image, and I would hate to be the White House employee who has to clean up after him. Worst government job ever. Well, you may have seen trolls referring to a hashtag on Twitter called “Qanon” which is an account originating from the 4Chan message board claiming to be an insider in the Trump White House who claims that they have inside dirt on elected democrats including Hillary Clinton and Nancy Pelosi. Well guess what? This week Alex Jones revealed some surprising insights into the “Qanon” account.

As Jared reported earlier today, Jerome Corsi, the Washington bureau chief for Alex Jones’ Infowars, who has spent hours online every day for the last several months “decoding” the cryptic message-board posts made by an anonymous figure known as “QAnon,” has declared that “Q” has been “compromised” and that his postings can no longer be trusted.

Many fringe right-wing activists believe that QAnon was a high-level Trump administration official who has been leaking secret intelligence information to them via the anonymous message boards 4chan and 8chan and Corsi was among the most vocal proponents of the theory, having once even claimed that President Trump himself had directly ordered QAnon to release information.

Recently, Corsi began to sour on QAnon and today he joined Jones on his radio program where Jones claimed that he had personally spoken with QAnon and had been told that the account had been compromised and should no longer be trusted.

“I was on the phone this morning talking to some folks who were out playing golf with people that have been involved in QAnon, they say, ‘Hey, that’s been taken over, we’re unable to even post anymore, that’s not us anymore,'” Jones said. “I’ve talked to QAnon. There is only about five or six that have actually be posting. I’ve talked to QAnon and they are saying QAnon is no longer QAnon.”

Yes let’s. I have so many questions about this. How… who… what… how does Alex know who Qanon is unless it was someone inside Infowars? And how can it be compromised? Oh this isn’t even the weirdest thing Mr. Jones has done this week! We’ve talked about “The Storm” many times on this program, but how can you prove it exists? Well…

Jerome Corsi, the Washington bureau chief for Alex Jones’ Infowars, has been growing increasingly frustrated with the anonymous source at the center of the “QAnon” conspiracy theory and is now publicly doubting a piece of “evidence” that he once touted as irrefutable proof that the conspiracy was real.

Earlier this year, Corsi emerged as one of the leading figures promoting a conspiracy theory known as “The Storm.” Adherents to The Storm believe that a high-level Trump administration official is leaking secret intelligence information to them via the anonymous message boards 4chan and 8chan; Corsi once claimed that President Trump himself had directly ordered that activity.

Corsi has begun to sour on Q, as the anonymous poster is known, after Q alleged that people like Corsi who are using the laughably fake conspiracy theory to enrich themselves. As a result, Corsi has started to publicly doubt the authenticity of a grainy photo of an ink pen that he once claimed “pretty much authenticates that QAnon is very close to Donald Trump.”

So let’s contemplate this for a minute. Alex Jones has talked to Trump, Infowars has a bureau inside the White House… maybe it’s someone within Infowars? And how can they be compromised unless it was just someone fucking with people?

The fringiest part of the right wing fringe, the ones who have been pushing this idiotic conspiracy theory about Trump destroying a global pedophile ring based on cryptic 8Chan postings by someone called Q Anon, is now splitting up over whether Q is authentic or not. Jerome Corsi’s total 180 on this is particularly amusing. He once claimed that a picture posted by Q was proof that he is very close to Trump, and might even be Trump himself:

The picture was of a pen on a desk, which got Corsi just trembling with excitement.

“That’s the Laurel desk,” Corsi said while discussing the image in question. “It’s the one that Obama used and apparently Trump is also using at Camp David. That’s the desktop at Camp David.”

“The pen is a Montblanc ink pen that Trump has used for a long time,” Corsi continued. “That’s Camp David over the weekend and that picture had to have been taken by somebody who was there with President Trump. His pen on the desk; that pretty much authenticates that QAnon is very close to Donald Trump and present in some of these really important inner circle White House meetings.”

Wait, wait, wait, wait. So you’re trying to prove a conspiracy through the use of the same pen? That would be like trying to prove your wife is having an affair because you saw her and the guy she was seeing in the same hotel and they were eating the same mints! But in the era of fake news, nobody does it faker than Alex Jones and Jerome Corsi. Yes that is a thing. Look it up.

Alex Jones is claiming that the end has come for the anonymous QAnon account, which right-wing supporters believed to be run by a high-level Trump administration official (or officials) leaking classified intelligence on message boards like 4chan.

QAnon had for months dropped “breadcrumbs” of clues they said would lead to the revelation of a huge sex trafficking conspiracy at the highest levels of government. Jerome Corsi, the Washington bureau chief for Jones’ Infowars, had for months been following the trail of breadcrumbs, aka “decoding” cryptic messageboard posts by the anonymous figure.

But recently Corsi wasn’t getting the info he wanted from the source, and now Jones claims he’s talked to the people behind QAnon. Jones said the account has been “taken over,” left-wing advocacy group Right Wing Watch reported Friday.

“I was on the phone this morning talking to some folks who were out playing golf with people that have been involved in QAnon, they say, ‘Hey, that’s been taken over, we’re unable to even post anymore, that’s not us anymore,’” Jones said on his radio show. “I’ve talked to QAnon. There is only about five or six that have actually be posting. I’ve talked to QAnon and they are saying QAnon is no longer QAnon.”

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[font size="8"]I Need A Drink
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It’s time for a new installment of:

And man do I need a drink this week! Considering how dark this week has been – I mean we’re on the verge of the apocalypse here! But I have some good news to report for a change and that’s why we’re celebrating with some drinking! So tell me bartender, what goes well with sports gambling? Tall boys of Bud Light? I’m in! I’ll take five of those thanks. So the Supreme Court, in a near unanimous ruling, overturned the long time federal ban on sports gambling. So what does that mean?

The Supreme Court has struck down a 1992 federal law that effectively prevented most states from legalizing sports betting, clearing up a legal gray area and opening a door for state governments to join in what has become a lucrative industry.

"Congress can regulate sports gambling directly, but if it elects not to do so, each State is free to act on its own," the court wrote in a decision released Monday.

The law known as the Professional and Amateur Sports Protection Act, passed in 1992, prohibited sports betting, except in four states where it had already been legalized — Nevada, Delaware, Montana and Oregon. It gave the other states one year to legalize such betting, if they wanted to.

Wait a minute Homer, not just yet. So the Supreme Court just made it legal across the land to gamble on sports. Now you might be asking “how does this affect Pete Rose”? Well of course his name is synonymous with sports betting so here is the answer!

It may not have felt like it, but Monday was a watershed day for sports.

The Supreme Court on Monday struck down the Professional and Amateur Sports Protection Act that had outlawed sports betting outside of the state of Nevada. That will allow other states to offer legalized sports betting if they so choose.

Not long after the Supreme Court's ruling, Pete Rose's name began to trend on Twitter.

Rose agreed in 1989 to a permanent ban for gambling, although he denied at the time that he had bet on baseball games. In 2007, Rose admitted that he had bet on games every night while he was managing the Reds. That admission didn't change Major League Baseball's outlook on Rose's ban.

So yeah Pete Rose unfortunately is still Pete Rose – ban or no ban. But what does this mean for the future of gambling? Well like most things that are American, it will be loud, it will be proud, it will be in your face, and it will be 24 hours a day, 7 days a week! Because if there’s money to be made, people are going to come for it! Like vultures.

The United States Supreme Court delivered a historic decision Monday morning, ruling the federal law banning sports betting in most states was unconstitutional. The Supreme Court voted 7-2 in favor of striking down the ban.

Long story short, Monday's ruling allows states to pass their own sports betting laws. It will take some time for those laws to be put into place -- New Jersey, which brought the case to the Supreme Court, is the state most ready to jump into action right now -- but the road has been paved.

Major League Baseball issued the following statement following Monday's ruling:

"Today's decision by the United States Supreme Court will have profound effects on Major League Baseball. As each state considers whether to allow sports betting, we will continue to seek the proper protections for our sport, in partnership with other professional sports. Our most important priority is protecting the integrity of our games. We will continue to support legislation that creates air-tight coordination and partnerships between the state, the casino operators and the governing bodies in sports toward that goal."

MLB has a long and complicated history with sports betting. What does Monday's ruling mean for the league? Here are four things to know.

“There is going to be so much winning that we will be sick of winning, OK! Totally. Unbelievable. I hire the best winners!”. But of the four major leagues in the US – the NHL, the NFL, the NBA, and the MLB, you know which league is going to benefit the most? Yup! You guessed it!

Although it is always difficult to read the tea leaves about court cases, especially in the United States Supreme Court, I noticed a clear preference from the Court for striking down PASPA, the law preventing implementation of state sports betting, when I attended oral arguments on December 4, 2017 (discussed here). Well, the tea leaves were right. The world as we know it with sports betting in this country changed yesterday at 10 a.m. with the 7-2 opinion in favor of New Jersey, allowing that state, and a caravan of others to follow, to implement sports betting. Welcome to the future.

Here is a quick look at the opinion, with a longer discussion of the impact on the NFL and beyond:
The Opinion

Let’s clear up some confusion about what the decision did or did not say. The Supreme Court did not grant a consitutional right to sports gambling. This is a case about states’ rights prevailing over federal “authorization.” As the opinion of Justice Alito noted: “We have always understood that even where Congress has the authority under the Constitution to pass laws requiring or prohibiting certain acts, it lacks the power directly to compel the States to require or prohibit those acts.”


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[font size="8"]Stupidest State Contest: Round 2 Week 4
[br] [/font]

16 states will enter, but only one will be crowned the new Top 10 Conservative Idiots Stupidest State!

Welcome back! I hope you all filled out your brackets! Round 2 of the tournament is over and man there have been some exciting developments. Last week we were live at the Golden 1 Center in Sacramento where Wisconsin pulled it out against West Virginia to advance to the Final Four! And this week, we’re live at a venue that has hosted many real life Final Fours, the Fabulous Forum in Inglewood, California where we will have our last double matchup of the tournament! This is it! The last double matchup of the tournament. We have all four corners of conservativism represented – god, guns, greed, and batshit insanity! Only two of these teams will move onto the finals at Staples Center, the losers will go home. So who will it be this week? Let’s find out!

[font size="6"]Flyover League Championship: Kentucky Vs Wisconsin [/font]

[font size="4"]Kentucky[/font]

We are into the stretch here people! One more week and we will be putting Stupidest State 2018 to bed for Season 4. But it’s been great. We still have two matchups to go. First up is Kentucky – this year’s king of batshit has certainly proven their credentials this far as to why they are the craziest state in the union not named Florida. Just like their college basketball team, the Wildcats of UK, have generated all star after all star, Kentucky has done the same! They have given us Rand Paul and Mitch McConnell (Cocaine Mitch as he’s now called) and Kim Davis and Matt Bevin. But one of the craziest states in the union certainly isn’t done yet!

Eddie Devine voted for President Donald Trump because he thought he would be good for American business. Now, he says, the Trump administration’s restrictions on seasonal foreign labor may put him out of business.

“I feel like I’ve been tricked by the devil,” said Devine, owner of Harrodsburg-based Devine Creations Landscaping. “I feel so stupid.”

Devine says it has been years since he could find enough dependable, drug-free American workers for his $12-an-hour jobs mowing and tending landscapes for cemeteries, shopping centers and apartment complexes across Central Kentucky.

So for years he has hired 20 seasonal workers, mostly from Guatemala, through the U.S. Labor Department’s H2-B “guest worker” program. Importing these workers for a few months cost him an additional $18,000 in fees and expenses beyond their wages, which must be the same as he pays American workers. But that’s the only way he could serve his customers.

Read more here: http://www.kentucky.com/news/local/news-columns-blogs/tom-eblen/article210676214.html

Well you know when you fall for a con artist like Trump, don’t be surprised when you get conned. I mean after all, Kentucky was the first state in the union to call it for @realDonaldTrump, so how has he treated his friends so far?

Pikeville -- Martin County's troubled water district failed to meet its first reporting deadline to Kentucky regulators after it was granted an emergency rate increase to prevent its financial collapse.

The failure prompted regulators to threaten the water system again this week with a forced takeover.

The deadlines were issued when the Public Service Commission, the state agency that regulates most utilities in Kentucky, gave the district permission in March to raise rates by 28 percent.

Martin County Water District officials said the district needed an influx of cash to stave off impending financial collapse. As part of the agreement, the PSC ordered the district to submit detailed financial records on the 15th of every month, starting in April.

Read more here: http://www.kentucky.com/news/state/article210866209.html

[font size="4"]Wisconsin [/font]

Ah Wisconsin – another state ravaged by reckless Koch and Heritage Foundation policies. Last week we talked heavily about the teacher protests that have been coming to light because teachers are fed up with the people who we have elected, and why wouldn’t they be? Of course they’ve been getting tricked by slick looking hucksters for 40 years. And then there’s another company coming to Wisconsin, aided by Paul Ryan, called Foxconn. Of course if you do a quick Google search for Foxconn, you can tell all about their egregious human rights violations and horrible working conditions. So how have they treated Wisconsin so far?

Foxconn Technology Group has selected a company led by a Republican megadonor with close ties to Gov. Scott Walker to develop the master plan for its massive campus in Wisconsin.

Foxconn announced Monday that it chose Hammes Company to be the lead developer on the project that will house a display-screen factory on a campus spread over 2,900 acres (1173.61 hectares). Foxconn could qualify for up to $4.5 billion in taxpayer incentives.

Hammes is led by Jon Hammes, Walker's campaign finance chairman for his re-election bid. Hammes is part owner of the NBA's Milwaukee Bucks and has given hundreds of thousands of dollars to Republicans and causes over the years.

Wisconsin Democratic Party chair Martha Laning says the Foxconn project "is all about helping Scott Walker save his own career and not about the people of Wisconsin."

Yup – a little “you scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours” variety of quid pro quo! And it’s good to know that Scott Walker has the best interests of the good people of Wisconsin at heart! Because air, water, who needs these things? There’s profits to be made!

As Wisconsin taxpayers eyeball the budget-busting Foxconn costs legislators committed them to — originally $3 billion, to the now projected $4.47 billion, an almost 50 percent increase — Manitowoc County residents will endure environmental degradation, health risks and commercial losses.

Whether Wisconsin's environmental waivers for Foxconn comply with the Great Lakes Compact is a potential litigation cost for taxpayers. Dave Dempsey of the water protection group For the Love of Water (FLOW) argues "the Racine proposal should not have been approved under the Compact and Wisconsin law because (a) the proposal does not 'solely serve a public water supply purpose' of the straddling community; (b) the public water supply as to the water diverted or to be transferred or diverted does not 'serve largely residential users;' and (c) Racine does not qualify under the straddling community definition."

Litigation costs will continue to mount as Illinois Attorney General Lisa Madigan files suit against the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency, stating, "Despite its name, the Environmental Protection Agency now operates with total disregard for the quality of our air and water, and in this case, the U.S. EPA is putting a company’s profit ahead of our natural resources and the public’s health.”

[font size="4"]And the winner is… [/font]

Oh my god! Kentucky pulled it out against Wisconsin and they win by another routing of Wisconsin and this time they win by a whopping 19 points! Final score: 91 – 72! Kentucky will be moving on to the national championship! Cut the net guys you earned it!

[font size="6"]Layover League Championship: Florida Vs Missouri [/font]

[font size="4"]Florida[/font]

Ah, Florida, you guys! If you remember last year’s tournament they had a strong presence going into the conference finals but they quickly bowed out due to an utter disaster involving Florida Man’s over inflated ego and his disastrous stunt that cost the team the tournament. Well this year Florida is angry, they’re pissed, and they’re very well armed. In fact this was the state that was the site of that horrific shooting at Majorie Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland. And you know what? We haven’t learned a damn thing since then!

The National Rifle Association has reportedly filed a lawsuit over Florida gun legislation that was signed into law on Friday.

The lawsuit takes issue with the part of the bill that raises the age limit for purchasing all firearms from 18 to 21, according to the Associated Press. The NRA claims the regulation violates the 2nd amendment.

Florida lawmakers passed a bill this week that implements a three-day waiting period for purchase of most long guns and bans bump stocks, among other regulations. The bill came just a few weeks after the shooting that left 17 dead and more than a dozen injured at a South Florida high school.

Florida GOP Gov. Rick Scott signed the bill into law on Friday, despite opposition from the NRA

Read more: http://thehill.com/regulation/court-battles/377694-nra-sues-over-new-florida-gun-legislation-report?amp&__twitter_impression=true

Of course if you have an R next to your name, don’t attempt anything even remotely humanly decent or the gun lobby will come to you and give you a stern talking to. You know, kind of like getting sent to the principal’s office except the principal comes to you and humiliates you in front of the class. But of course there’s lots of blame for this shooting, but you know what it really was? Political correctness. Yup, you guessed it!

Stefan Molyneux, a video blogger popular with far-right and alt-right audiences, claimed that it was actually “political correctness” and not loose guns regulations that enabled the mass murder of 17 people at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Florida last month.

In a video uploaded yesterday, Molyneux sought to break down what he believed to be “the ugly truth” about the March for Our Lives protests on Saturday, which attracted hundreds of thousands of people across the United States to stand with survivors of the shooting who demanded gun reform measures aimed at making schools safer.

“Now, of course, the proximate cause for all of this was the shooting in Broward County recently—the shooting of the children. And because there is an emotionally reactive group of people who either have never been exposed to the facts and the truth about that shooting, about guns as a whole, or simply have simply ignored it if they have been exposed to it, or they’re simply useful happy bleating idiots—the puppets of the puppet master—speaking out against the elemental freedoms of the United States,” Molyneux said.

“The fact is that it was not fundamentally a gun that killed those kids in the school in Florida. What killed those kids was political correctness,” he said. “What killed those kids was political correctness.”

[font size="4"]Missouri [/font]

OK so we’ve talked about the right wing conspiracy theory known as “the Storm” – the theory that a group of global elites are involved in a child sex trafficking ring that would dwarf anything that’s seen before. But the Show Me State has not only actual child sex trafficking going on, they’re the home of some of the most horrible anit-woman and anti-family laws in the country. Making them one of the most perfect candidates ever to unseat Alabama and win the Family Values Conference! This is from last year but it firmly cements Missouri’s credentials!

The Missouri House is aiming to drastically restrict reproductive rights, including enshrining into law discrimination against people who use contraceptives or have had an abortion.
Planned Parenthood

Reproductive rights in Missouri are set to take a huge leap backward, if the conservative House in that state has its way.

During a special session called by Republican Gov. Eric Greitens, the House passed a stunningly regressive bill that would allow employers and landlords to discriminate against women who have used birth control, had an abortion, or — in a bizarre catch-22 — are pregnant.

The bill actually seeks to undo an existing ordinance in the city of St. Louis that banned such discrimination.

It also includes draconian new regulations on abortion clinics, such as “banning abortion clinic staffers from requesting that ambulances responding to medical emergencies at their facilities avoid using sirens or flashing lights” — something clinics may do to avoid attracting attention from anti-abortion extremists who would use such a sight to push falsified, gratuitous stories that further their agenda.

The bill is a harsher version of one the Missouri Senate passed days prior, which Planned Parenthood Advocates in Missouri called out for its “medically unnecessary restrictions” on abortion...........................

Damn straight that’s republican family values in a nutshell! So Planned Parenthood kills more babies than Nazi Germany according to them. And Missouri’s political credentials? Well their governor Eric Greitens is so bad that the house is threatening to impeach him – and he ran on a family values campaign! So much for that!

JEFFERSON CITY • Legislative leaders announced Thursday night that they will convene a special session on May 18 that could lead to the impeachment of Gov. Eric Greitens.

The announcement was made at a press conference called by Senate President Pro Tem Ron Richard and House Speaker Todd Richardson.

The decision was made after 138 House members and 29 Senators signed a petition calling for the session on the controversies surrounding the governor. The session will begin an estimated 30 minutes after the regular session is set to end, Richard told reporters.

Richard was not sure when senators would actually convene because the upper chamber's duties are dependent on what the House does.


[font size="4"]And the winner is… [/font]

Another stunner! Florida managed to route Missouri by a whopping 30 points and they take the lead with a new record going into the final round! Final score – 87 – 57! Cut the net guys, you earned it!

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

This is it folks! It’s the championship round, and we’re live in a venue that has hosted a whopping 6 Lakers championships and 2 Kings championships – the one and only Staples Center in downtown Los Angeles, and only one state can be the winner. Florida. Kentucky. The best of the best. The cream of the crop. One of these two teams will be crowned the 2018 Stupidest State! Stay tuned!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Post Malone[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen, my next guest is an amazing hip hop artist who recently headlined Coachella and you can see him on tour this summer and at the Hollywood Bowl on June 27th. His latest album is called “Beerbongs and Bentleys”. Playing his song “Stay”, give it up for Post Malone!

See you next week!


Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: City National Grove Of Anaheim, Anaheim, CA
Special Thanks To: City National Grove Management
Images: All images copyright belongs to respective copyright holders.
Videos: All videos copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
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Research: Top 10 Research Department
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HR: Top 10 Human Resources Department
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Wheel Of Corruption By: Studio 1 Stage Props, Burbank, CA
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Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

May 9, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-17: Wheel Of Corruption & The Prisoner Of Azkaban Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-17: Wheel Of Corruption & The Prisoner Of Azkaban Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! 15 minutes with us can save an average of 15% or more on your car insurance! So we got to start by talking about the Met Gala. This is even more of a nerd prom than the White House Correspondents Dinner. Probably my favorite thing about last night was seeing our good friends in the band Ghost calling out Rhianna for copying their style. Well let’s expand on that a bit. I know next to nothing about the fashion world so nothing in that world makes sense to me. But apparently every year the Met Gala has a theme. And this year the theme was Catholic chic. Yeah those two words don’t exactly don’t go hand in hand, but have you seen what the Pope is wearing lately? He’s fabulous! And the crazy decorations that are all over the Vatican City? Oh honey don’t get me started please! But then there was Jaden Smith. Jaden… what are you doing? Every year for the last two years, Will Smith’s son has brought a truly odd choice of dates with him to the high fashion prom. One year he brought his sister Willow. OK that’s a perfectly normal choice for a date in some eyes. Then last year he brought… his hair. Yes, he brought his hair for a date. Well apparently that relationship didn’t last long because he broke up with his signature dreads. His date this year? He brought a gold record. Yes, not just any gold record – a gold record of his hit single “Icon”. So if we extrapolate this – does that mean that Jaden is dating himself? Or does he only love inanimate objects now? I have so many questions about this! But ain’t nobody got time for that. We have a lot of idiocy to get to. But first John Oliver is back and he delves into the history of Trump’s lawyer, Rudy Giuliani:

Hey the Wheel Of Corruption is back everybody! Number one this week is Donald Trump (1). So while the popular opinion is swaying against guns, Trump went to the NRA’s convention and made it clear that he’s the president for the gun nuts. Sigh. In the second slot this week we’re going to take a look at the guy who’s going to replace Wayne La Pierre – Oliver North (2) because in the GOP – traitors never die or even have to answer for their crimes, because, patriotism. In the number three slot this week, our first lady Melania Trump finally unveiled her campaign to end cyberbullying called “Be Best” – and surprise – she’s being accused of plagiarism! At number 4 we’re going to ask “How Is This Still A Thing” and this week we're going to talk separation of church and state and ask "The House Chaplain - How Is This Still A Thing?". In the number 5 slot this week is our weekly investigative piece “Top 10 Investigates” and this week we’re going to talk about Amazon. So Amazon is shopping around for where they’re going to put their new mega warehouse, but is that something you really want in your city? At number 6 this week – is our weekly sermon of all things holy, Holy Shit, and this week we’re going to have some fun and explore Jim Bakker’s end times product line. In the number 7 slot this week we’ve got a new installment of “People Who Somehow Got Elected” and this week we’re going to profile Kentucky governor Matt Bevin. Whew, he is crazy. Taking the 8th slot this week is our old buddy Alex Jones and this week he dropped one batshit crazy theory that wouldn’t seem out of place in the Terminator universe. In the number 9 (NEIN!!!!) slot this week we have a new installment of “I Need A Drink” and this week we are going to get drunk and tell you all the ways you can make money off the Royal Wedding of Prince Harry to Megan Markle. Because we care. Finally this week we’ve got the finale for Round 2 of our Stupidest State contest! This week we’re live at Sacramento’s new Golden 1 Center and it’s a battle to see who can go for broke as Wisconsin takes on West Virginia in a battle for the Fiscal Irresponsibility Championship! Plus we’ve got some live music for you from A Perfect Circle! Really, if you don’t have their new album “Eat The Elephant” by now, you are no friend of this show! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font]

Hey everybody! It’s time for the WHEEL OF CORRUPTION!!! Yay!!!!

Of course you know the rules by now – I spin the wheel and we have to talk about whatever it lands on. Of course if it lands on the guacamole option, you know that it costs $1.50 extra. So here’s what is on the wheel this week:

- Guns
- Abortion
- Crime
- Poverty
- Chance
- 5,000
- Infowars
- Nazis
- Go Directly To Jail
- Buy A Vowel
- North Korea
- Lawsuits
- Whammy
- Donald Trump
- People Are Dumb
- ‘Merica!
- How Is This Still A Thing?
- A Random Tweet
- 10,000
- Community Chest
- Talk Shows
- Clip Without Context
- Something Random In The News
- Fox News
- Top 10 Investigates
- Polls
- Chance
- Nukes
- Protests
- Intermission
- 15,000
- Bankrupt
- Morally Bankrupt
- Golf
- The GOP
- Butter Beer
- Community Chest
- Florida (Obviously)
- This Fucking Guy
- Beating A Dead Horse
- Holy Shit
- Guacamole ($1.50 Extra)
- Harry Potter
- T-Shirt Cannon
- ? (Mystery Item)
- I Need A Drink
- Lightning Round
- Bonus Spin

Let’s get this going! Spin that shit! Wheel goes ‘round, wheel goes ‘round… and it lands on… oh look a clip without context!

I think I’ll side with the witches thanks! Spin it again… guns! Sigh… people, have we learned nothing from the recent events? So the popular opinion right now is moving away from the theory that guns are good, and saying that – wait for it – guns are not good! Yeah they might, I don’t know, kill people? OK I’ll take the blame coming from the gun nuts and own that shit! So the gun nuts basically took a massive shit on all the people killed by guns in the last year in senseless tragedies by turning out in record numbers.

The National Rifle Association’s annual meeting this year in Dallas set an attendance record, an NRA spokesperson tweeted on Monday.

Dana Loesch said that 87,154 people attended the convention over the three-day weekend.

The National Rifle Association’s annual meeting this year in Dallas set an attendance record, an NRA spokesperson tweeted on Monday.

Dana Loesch said that 87,154 people attended the convention over the three-day weekend.

President Trump and Vice President Pence both attended the NRA convention last week.

Because Secret Service policy prohibits firearms at events Trump or Pence attend, guns were banned at certain events, sparking criticism.

Trump also triggered controversy with his speech, during which he railed against immigrants, Democrats and France and Britain’s gun laws.

“They took their time and gunned them down one by one — boom, come over here, boom, come over here, boom,” Trump said, referring to victims fatally shot in Paris while pointing his hand as if it were a gun.

The French foreign ministry later expressed its "firm disapproval of President Trump's remarks," adding in a statement the nation "calls for the respect of the memory of the victims.”

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! You know it fucking sucks in this country when we have a mass shooting in this country and it drums up *MORE* interest in guns and America’s addiction with the killing machines. It sucks even more when the guy who’s supposed to unite us in a time of tragedy is instead siding with the people who cause it.

US President Donald Trump took aim at two of America's closest allies in a speech at the NRA convention, saying strict gun laws failed to prevent the 2015 terrorist attacks in Paris and highlighting a purported increase in knife violence in London.

The comments provoked anger in both France and Britain.

France was especially incensed after Trump, while speaking at the gun rights convention in Dallas on Friday, pointed his hand as if it were a gun while describing how each of the victims in Paris was fatally shot.

"They took their time and gunned them down one by one -- boom, come over here, boom, come over here, boom," he said.

The French foreign ministry issued a statement Saturday after Trump's comments.

Leave it to the guy who we currently call president to turn an innocent speech into an international incident. “I have the best speeches, OK?”. And by the way, when you’re seeking help for the midterms, maybe you don’t go to the people who vote with their guns, OK?

DALLAS — President Trump made a passionate appeal to the National Rifle Association on Friday to help him in the midterm elections, renewing his longstanding bond with the controversial gun-rights group just months after criticizing members of Congress for being overly deferential to the gun lobby.

After a season of tumult in the national debate over gun violence, Mr. Trump left little doubt about his political allegiance at the N.R.A.’s annual convention in Texas. The president, who briefly mulled a package of incremental gun-control measures after a February high school shooting in Parkland, Fla., cast himself as a lock step ally for the organization and implored its members to vote in November.

“Your Second Amendment rights are under siege,” Mr. Trump said. “But they will never, ever be under siege as long as I am your president.”

Mr. Trump’s visit to the convention, alongside Vice President Mike Pence, amounted to an unreserved show of support for the N.R.A., and a further signal that Democrats and Republicans are likely to campaign on diametrically opposed gun-policy platforms this year. Most Democrats have endorsed an assortment of new gun regulations and many have attacked the N.R.A. by name.

Uh, no, you fucking idiots. Nobody’s second amendment rights are under siege. We’re the only country in the entire world where 50 people are killed in a mass shooting and our first thought is “but were the guns hurt?”. So where does the NRA stand on controlling its’ own product? And nothing says “having fun” like endlessly quoting gun statistics!

DALLAS ― John Lott, the National Rifle Association’s favorite academic and gun researcher, had a question for the mostly older, white, male crowd seated in front of him.

How many of them had heard someone say that federal gun research has been stymied for years because of Congress? Or that the U.S. has a uniquely high rate of gun homicide compared to other nations? Or that guns make suicide easier?

All those claims were lies, he said, told by gun control advocates and repeated by an unquestioning media intent on pushing an anti-gun agenda.

Over the weekend the NRA held its 147th annual convention, and Lott, whose highly discredited book More Guns, Less Crime, is considered the bible of the gun lobby, addressed a packed room inside the Kay Hutchison Convention Center here in downtown Dallas. For three days, gun rights enthusiasts gathered to peruse the newest firearms and gear, attend educational seminars such as “Refuse to be a victim: Crime prevention strategies,” and “14 factors impacting your shooting performance under duress,” and to simply have fun.

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[font size="8"]Oliver North
[br] [/font]

Let’s spin that shit! Come on no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop! It’s another clip without context!

To which I counter that clip with another clip:

Spin it again! Guns! Crooks in the GOP never seem to go away. In fact if you’re in the GOP and you have committed a crime – even if that crime is some right treason, somehow the republicans will love you more! Remember when Trump said he could literally shoot someone on 5th Avenue and he’d still have 90% of the republican base? Yeah there’s always that. Now, the NRA has literally embraced treason by naming this guy as their new president and CEO when Wayne La Pierre steps down!

Oliver North, the Fox News contributor and central figure in the Iran-Contra scandal, will be the National Rifle Association's new president, the group announced Monday.
"Oliver North is, hands down, the absolute best choice to lead our NRA Board, to fully engage with our members, and to unflinchingly stand and fight for the great freedoms he has defended his entire life," NRA executive vice president and CEO Wayne LaPierre said in a statement on the pick.
In his statement, LaPierre compared North favorably to Charlton Heston, the Hollywood icon who was once president of the group.
North will become president "within a few weeks," the group said, and is retiring from his position at Fox News, effective immediately.

North will join the NRA at an increasingly contentious juncture for the group, facing off against a renewed push for gun control in the wake of the February school shooting in Parkland, Florida. Some survivors of the shooting have emerged as prominent voices in favor of gun control measures and have accused the NRA of endangering lives through political influence.

Yes, why is the question I have? Guys like this never seem to go away. Want proof? Remember last year how insane the Roy Moore for Senate campaign was? Now he is apparently running for governor of the same state! We’re just going to find out more weird and creepy things about him. Now that Oliver North is back in the news we’re going to learn about his past exploits, which may or may not have included some light treason.

He once stood at the center of an international political scandal, becoming a household name for destroying government documents and lying to members of Congress.

That was more than three decades ago.

Now, Oliver North, a retired lieutenant colonel in the U.S. Marine Corps, has a new job: president of the National Rifle Assn.

On Monday, the NRA's board of directors announced that the organization would now be headed by North, who many gun rights supporters are banking will be able to rally the base at a time when gun control groups believe momentum is on their side in the highly polarized national debate over firearms. In recent months, the powerful special-interest group has faced an onslaught of criticism from gun control organizations and has seen pushback in polls following mass shootings at a Florida high school and a country music festival in Las Vegas.

Robert Spitzer, who has written extensively on politics and gun control, said North is "a sort-of celebrity who raises the organization's visibility among its base," which is helpful ahead of the November election.

Yes, Oliver North may have committed some light treason back in the 80s, but he plays the patriot card and plays it well – which makes him the perfect guy to tell other patriots that the less patriotic candidate is coming to take your guns away!

Sometimes it feels as though the current moment in American history is unique. At other times, there’s a disquieting déjà vu—for example, this week, when Daniel Ortega, the Nicaragua Sandinista leader, and Ollie North, the American Marine who funneled weapons to his right-wing opponents, the Contras, are both in the news.

Ortega, now president once again, is holding on for bare political life amid protests in his country. North, it turns out, is about to take over another controversial, oft-protested body: The National Rifle Association announced Monday that North will be its next president.

From a certain angle, North’s ascension is a peculiar choice for the NRA, both given the current political moment and given North’s own history. North came to national prominence in the Iran-Contra affair, in which the U.S. illegally sold weapons to Iran—violating an arms embargo—then funneled the proceeds to the Contras, who were fighting Ortega’s left-wing government. North, a Vietnam veteran, was then a lieutenant colonel serving on the National Security Council. He was charged with various felonies related to Iran-Contra and convicted of three. The New York Times editorial board tartly panned his verdict: “Oliver North won’t go to prison even though he lied to Congress, shredded White House documents and accepted a $14,000 security fence from an Iran-contra arms profiteer.” As it turned out, North’s convictions were reversed and vacated altogether because a judge ruled that the prosecution had used testimony North offered Congress under an immunity agreement.

Oh come on – he’s just like Trump! He wants to build a wall and shredded official White House documents in an effort to gain immunity! I mean with the NRA being fingered in Mueller’s investigation, what’s there to stop him from taking the 5th again? After all, Mr. North does have experience in this sort of thing!

The National Rifle Association reported this week that it received more money from people with Russian ties than it has previously acknowledged, but announced that it was officially done cooperating with a congressional inquiry exploring whether illicit Kremlin-linked funding passed through the NRA and into Donald Trump’s 2016 presidential campaign, Sen. Ron Wyden (D-Ore.) said on Wednesday.

Wyden released a letter from the NRA, dated Tuesday, in which the gun rights group reported receiving $2,512.85 in contributions and membership dues “from people associated with Russian addresses” or known Russian nationals living in the United States from 2015 to the present. In the past, a congressional aide to Wyden said, the group had confirmed receiving only one financial contribution, in the form of a lifetime membership purchased by Alexander Torshin, a Russian banker.

Torshin, a gun enthusiast and an associate of President Vladimir Putin of Russia, is the focus of an FBI investigation into whether any Russian money was funneled through the NRA and on to the Trump campaign, perhaps through NRA entities not required to disclose their funding sources. The Trump administration imposed stiff sanctions last week against Torshin, who has denied wrongdoing, and six other Russian oligarchs and 17 Russian government officials in response to Russian interference in the 2016 election.

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[font size="8"]Melania Trump
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Let’s spin the wheel shall we? Come on, no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy, stop! And it lands on… no, a whammy!!!

Spin it again… and lt lands on Morally Bankrupt. So of course you know that every first lady since the dawn of time has been given their own mission. And most usually start theirs the day after inauguration day. Well when you’re Melania Trump and you’re married to the biggest cyber bully in the entire world, choosing to go on a quest to end cyber bullying, may not exactly be your strong point. Oh and did we mention it’s taken 1 year and 3 months to come up with a campaign and name?

Melania Trump, nearly 16 months into her tenure as first lady, has at last revealed her formal platform: "Be Best." The comprehensive program will focus on three main points -- well-being, fighting opioid abuse and positivity on social media -- and is the culmination of the past several months of Trump's various public events, all of which centered around helping children.

"As a mother and as first lady, it concerns me that in today's fast-paced and ever-connected world, children can be less prepared to express or manage their emotions and oftentimes turn to forms of destructive or addictive behavior such as bullying, drug addiction or even suicide," she said during a Rose Garden event Monday.

"I feel strongly that as adults we can and should be best at educating our children about the importance of a healthy and balanced life," the first lady said.
Trump has in recent weeks experienced a significant surge in support, a new CNN poll revealed Monday, including among women and Democrats.

In a poll conducted by SSRS last week, 57% say they have a favorable impression of Trump, up from 47% in January. This is the biggest number Melania Trump has experienced in any CNN polling, and higher than any favorability rating earned by President Donald Trump in CNN polling history going back to 1999.

You know Melania, you’re missing the word “the” in there. “Be Best”? I mean the song doesn’t doesn’t go “You be best! Whoa, nothing’s ever gonna keep you down!”. But really? That’s the best thing they could come up with? Oh and hey Melania if you really care about cyberbullying you’d divorce your husband. Just saying. Let’s explore this further.

Some people think parts of first lady Melania Trump's "Be Best" initiative aren't entirely her own.

Trump announced the program Monday. It focuses on three main points regarding kids: well-being, fighting opioid abuse and positivity on social media.

Critics are taking issue with a pamphlet about children's online habits that the White House released as part of her initiative, saying it looks eerily similar to one released by the Federal Trade Commission in 2014.

But the White House always credited the FTC for the pamphlet. Initially it gave the FTC dual writing credit with the first lady, but it later changed the wording on its website to say Melania Trump was promoting the materials.

A Trump administration official told The Guardian the wording had been changed in order to clear up any confusion.

Yes – wait wait wait wait wait. Wait. Wait. So Melania may have plagiarized a talking point from a previous first lady? Yes bullying is nothing to scoff at. It’s something that kills people. But I still can’t get over the fact that they’re calling it “Be Best”. But apparently it’s not just children who the first lady is targeting.

WASHINGTON (AP) — Melania Trump is admonishing journalists to “be best” in their jobs following some unflattering news coverage of her initiative to promote child well-being.

The first lady launched the “Be Best” campaign on Monday to encourage adults to help teach children to be good citizens. Several news outlets reported that material she distributed for adults to talk to children about being online was similar to information distributed during the Obama administration.

Stephanie Grisham, the first lady’s spokeswoman, took the “opposition media” to task on Tuesday. She says in a statement that journalists used a day meant to promote positive efforts on behalf of children to lob “baseless accusations towards the first lady.”

Grisham said Monday that the Federal Trade Commission asked Mrs. Trump to include the booklet in her materials.

Yes, nobody messes with the Be Best people! Especially those damn fake news reporters! But of course the White House is coming into defense of Melania in spite of the plagiarism accusations.

The White House is miffed that first lady Melania Trump's speech announcing her agenda is being criticized for copying an Obama administration pamphlet on how to talk to kids about online cyber bullying.

A statement issued Tuesday by Trump's spokeswoman, Stephanie Grisham, attacked the "opposition media" for focusing on the strong similarities between two government pamphlets instead of the first lady's Be Best campaign to promote children's well-being during her term.

The statement said Trump's speech on Monday in the Rose Garden was "strong" and "met with a standing ovation and positive feedback."

But Trump critics immediately began tweeting Monday afternoon about the similarities between the Be Best campaign material and an educational booklet, “Talking With Kids About Being Online,” originally produced by the Federal Trade Commission in 2009.

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[font size="8"]The House Chaplain: How Is This Still A Thing?
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Spin that shit! No whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop! Racists!

Sure! That will help people identify you as “not a white nationalist”. I want to see that on resumes, people!! Spin it again! How is this still a thing? Time once again to ask:

This week: The House Chaplain. How is this still a thing? The House Chaplain was started way back during the early days of the country. But in a nation where we supposedly have a separation of church and state, we must ask how is this still a thing? In fact this very question is being debated this week as Paul Ryan attempted to simply cut the position!

Two members of the House of Representatives engaged in a shouting match on the floor Tuesday afternoon over the ongoing controversy surrounding House Chaplain Father Patrick Conroy, who returned to the chamber this week after claiming he was initially forced to resign by House Speaker Paul Ryan.

Rep. Tom MacArthur, a New Jersey Republican, confronted Rep. Joe Crowley, a New York Democrat, Tuesday afternoon after Crowley tried unsuccessfully to force another House floor vote to initiate an investigation into Conroy's initial resignation.

MacArthur approached Crowley on the floor and told him to "let go" of the issue, MacArthur recounted to reporters after the vote series. The exchange became heated, he said, after the towering Crowley demanded the much shorter MacArthur leave "his side of the floor."

"I said, ‘You know Joe this side of the floor belongs to the people of the United States, it’s not your side, and I’ll come here any time I want to,'" MacArthur said. "That got him wrapped around the axle quite a bit more and he exploded."

That’s actually Papa Emiritus III from the band Ghost. But its’ all the same. Leave it to the “peaceful” Christians in the House to throw down over religious issues. But guess what? This all comes back full circle as members of the house promise to “Be Best”. After all, these are the people who don’t want to hold hands and sing “kumbaya”.

House chaplain Patrick Conroy called on House members to be their “best selves” during Monday’s opening prayer, his first since House Speaker Paul Ryan reversed his decision to remove the chaplain.

“As members return to Washington, may they be encouraged and empowered by their constituents to be their best selves in serving in the People’s House,” said Conroy, a Catholic priest. “May the disagreements that seem to perjure give way to good faith efforts to find solutions to the issues facing our nation in a manner consistent with the great traditions of our republican form of government.”

Ryan’s reversal came on Thursday after Conroy challenged his forced resignation and essentially dared Ryan to fire him. In a letter to Ryan, Conroy said he had never heard a complaint about his ministry and disputed Ryan's justification for seeking his resignation.

Ryan, R-Wis., asked Conroy to resign in mid-April,saying later he had heard complaints about the chaplain's pastoral services. The speaker's decision sparked a backlash in both parties and across religious lines among lawmakers who thought Conroy was treated unfairly.

Yes we are all praying that someone will save us from these people. So why was the House Chaplain fired? Well some point to him channeling his inner Ned Flanders. Or outer Ned Flanders.

WASHINGTON – House Speaker Paul Ryan has forced out the House chaplain, Reverend Patrick Conroy.

Conroy had served as the chamber’s chaplain since 2011 but offered his resignation last week at Ryan’s urging.

Conroy’s resignation letter said he was offering to step down at Ryan’s request, calling his seven years of House service “one of the great privileges of my life.”

Ryan spokeswoman Ashlee Strong would not reveal the speaker’s reasons for forcing Conroy out. A top Democrat, Rep. Joe Crowley of New York, said he believes it was because of a prayer Conroy gave during last fall’s tax debate urging that lawmakers not “pick winners and losers” but spread its benefits equitably.

Strong said that was not the reason.

So we still don’t know why Father Conroy was shit canned. But he seems to have indicated that Paul Ryan fired him for no reason. But now that he was hired back, people are still asking why do we have this position when we’re supposed to have separation of church and state?

Now that we are finished with the spectacle of the U.S. House chaplain being forced out, then withdrawing his resignation and returning to his post, it’s a good time to ask a question that may have been bothering you all along: Why, exactly, does Congress, bound by the establishment clause of the Constitution, have a paid chaplain to deliver prayers and minister to its members?

If this arrangement were being set up today, it would almost certainly be held unconstitutional under contemporary judicial interpretation of the First Amendment. Since a key decision made in 1989, the U.S. Supreme Court has addressed most concerns about the government endorsement of religion by asking whether a given action sends a message to some believers that they are favored members of the political community and to others that they are disfavored.

The House chaplaincy rather obviously seems to violate this standard. The government is paying directly for a chaplain who comes from a single denomination – and has always been a Christian. If that doesn’t send a message of endorsement, I’m not sure what does.

But when it comes to the establishment clause, tradition matters. The fact that the House chaplaincy couldn’t be created now doesn’t mean it is unconstitutional. Therein lies a tale about religion, politics and the nature of a functioning Constitution.

There you have it. Even the House themselves is debating about whether or not we should be allowing religion in the House. That’s enough to make you ask – the House Chaplain:

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[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Amazon
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Spin it to win it! And it lands on… wait for it… something random in the news!

A 42-year-old Pennsylvania man is facing an assault and harassment charges after allegedly beating his mother with a Star Wars light saber, according to court records.

Police responding to an April 27 disturbance call at a home in Dubois found Joan Vargas, 75, being treated by EMS workers. Vargas was bleeding from gashes on her head and wrist.

Vargas told police that her son Andrew had “hit her repeatedly with what she called a light saber.” Vargas said she was sitting on a dining room chair when her son “began striking her with this saber in the head, on her back/neck area and on her wrist.”

“Joan could not say why Andrew struck her with the saber,” police noted. The 6’ 4”, 330-pound Vargas owns many other light sabers, his mother told investigators.

Spin it again! And it lands on… Top 10 Investigates!

It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates.

Amazon. Everyone knows them and loves them. And we are sure that most of you here have an Amazon Prime account. Because… shipping. But there has been a lot of news and a lot of buzz lately about a new potential for Amazon when they are shopping around from city to city for a new mega warehouse. But what happens? What would the environment be like inside the warehouse? What would it be like outside the warehouse and surrounding areas?

A former Amazon warehouse worker described being stopped in his tracks by an "awful smell" emanating from the trash cans. The stench, he said, was "unmistakable" and led him to one conclusion: His coworkers were so worried about taking too long on a bathroom break that they had resorted to urinating in the bin.

"I never witnessed anyone in the act but have witnessed the aftermath," the US staffer told Business Insider. "In three instances I had noticed an awful smell, pinpointed the location — trash bins that are scattered throughout the multitiered mezzanine — and reported it. From what I heard afterward, camera evidence got these associates fired."

His story echoes an investigation by the journalist James Bloodworth, who went undercover as a worker in an Amazon warehouse in the UK in 2016 for a book on low-wage jobs.

Bloodworth told Business Insider he once found a bottle of urine on a shelf, saying people would do so because they feared that a bathroom break would take too long and would cause them to miss their strict targets.

Holy shit indeed. These are the kinds of working conditions one must endure when working at a mega warehouse like Amazon. In fact two years ago there have been a number of allegations that have surfaced against the online mega conglomerate.

One of the most prominent attacks on Amazon’s work culture came from a scathing piece in the New York Times back in 2015. The piece alleged that employees were told that if they “hit the wall,” the only solution was to “climb the wall.” The article alleged that employees were expected to stay late, attend long meetings designed to force employees to tear apart one other’s ideas and respond to emails as late as midnight.

It even alleged that the company had a policy that encouraged employees to send anonymous feedback to supervisors as a way to sabotage one other and ruthlessly climb the corporate ladder. One employee, Bo Olson, claimed, “Nearly every person I worked with, I saw cry at their desk.”

Of course that was three years ago. But, more recently, a New York Post story reported on undercover investigator and author James Bloodworth’s attempts to infiltrate an Amazon Warehouse in Rugeley, Staffordshire, in the U.K.. Bloodworth alleged, “People just peed in bottles because they lived in fear of being disciplined over ‘idle time’ and ­losing their jobs just because they needed the loo.” He likened the warehouse to a prison.

Unfortunately it’s not like that prison. Think more Shawshank Redemption kind of prison. And yes, think that it’s even worse than you might hear. So what city does Amazon have in its’ midst for the new warehouse expansion?

An effort to generate more revenue to address dual crises in affordable housing and homelessness has spiraled into one of the biggest fights yet between Amazon and its hometown of Seattle while raising questions for the cities competing to host the online retail giant’s second headquarters.

Five of Seattle’s nine council members support a so-called head tax, which would require big businesses to pay 26 cents per hour for each of their employees. That amounts to about $500 per employee per year for the estimated 585 Seattle businesses that generate at least $20 million in revenue every year.

The money would be earmarked for construction of new affordable housing, and to address the city’s growing homelessness crisis. Supporters say the city’s existing tax structure — heavily dependent on sales and property taxes — needs additional revenue to foot the bill.

“Seattle has the most regressive tax systems in all of the country, and we’re looking at a way to get revenue in the door to address this public health crisis that does not raise sales taxes or property taxes once again,” said council member Teresa Mosqueda, who backs the bill. “It’s called shared responsibility so we can have shared prosperity.”

So Amazon is choosing Seattle because they don’t want to pay taxes, just like every other mega corporation. Why can’t they just hide their money in an off shore tax haven like the rest of them? Well Jeff Bezos wants to swindle his money the old fashioned American way! But the residents won’t have any of it. In fact they are fuming.

Here’s what people are saying about a proposal by Seattle City Council members to tax big employers, such as Amazon, to address the city’s housing affordability crisis.

A number of people across the region responded to a series of Seattle Times stories in the last week via email and social media, sharing their opinions of the so-called head-tax as tension surrounding the proposed measure climaxed with Amazon taking an unprecedented stand against it.

Supporters say the new tax would generate an estimated $75 million needed for housing and homeless services by taxing large employers about about $500 per employee per year.

The majority of responses were critical of the proposed tax — siding with frustrated homeowners in Ballard and iron workers downtown — or trashed the City Council’s approach to the homelessness crisis. At least one person said they were torn on the matter. Several gave support.

So there you have it – Amazon is so toxic that it’s created a divide in the city where it is trying to establish a warehouse. That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

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[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Spin that shit! No whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop! Clip without context!

To give you credit, Jim, I think you underestimated there a bit. Spin it again! Holy shit!

Gather around my fair brothers and sisters, it is time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate! For the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it is our weekly duty to remind you that the holiest among us are always the most full of:

You know my fair brothers and sisters, we usually cover a wide variety of topics in our weekly sermon from a wide variety of followers of the LAWRD! But this week we are going to focus on one, and one in particular. I’m talking about a guy who is so batshit crazy that he has his own special section on Right Wing Watch. He has a wide variety of end times products for us to sell! Yes everything from barely edible emergency survival food to a whole fucking village. Literally! I’m of course talking about Brother Jim Bakker. Brother Jim is in a world of hurt right now because he’s selling shit and nobody is buying it!

Controversial televangelist Jim Bakker has claimed that the Missouri town in which he is building a Christian community is equipped to survive the end of the world, and is selling survival gear, such as packs of bottles that cost $150.

Baker said on his program "The Jim Bakker Show" earlier this week that various prophets have predicted that if there is a major world disaster and humankind faces the end of the world, people in large cities are not going to be able to survive.

That is why for 15 years Bakker has been building his Morningside community in Blue Eye, Missouri, which will come with an amphitheater, houses for the residents, and a chapel that can be used for weddings.

He also is advertising survival gear, such as a pack of six "extreme survival" water bottles being sold for $150. His website claims that the bottles are "designed using a combination of both Advanced and Radiological filters."

"You all are going to know soon why God brought us here," Bakker said on Tuesday's show.

"Do you know the people from the government, from NASA, the research from so many of them, they have said in their research that the safest place to live in troubled times is right here. That's why God brought us here," he added.

So Brother Jim is constructing his own village, because as you know – you all know, that in our good book, it says that “it takes a village to save mankind from impending doom”. That is a prophecy from the good LAWRD, creator of all things holy. Can I get an amen? And in terms of his village, apparently science is the reason why you should live in his village!

End Times prepper pastor Jim Bakker has spent the last several episodes of his television program urging viewers not only to stock up on his buckets of survival food, but to move to his Morningside community outside of Branson, Missouri, in preparation for the Last Days, claiming on yesterday’s program that government scientists have declared that this location will be the best place to ride out the coming Tribulation.

“There is nowhere on earth you could live with more of God’s generals here,” Bakker proclaimed, bizarrely bragging that “Branson has the number-one Christian theater in the world.”

“You all are going to know soon why God brought us here,” he said. “Do you know the people from the government, from NASA, the research from so many of them, they have said in their research that the safest place to live in troubled times is right here. That’s why God brought us here.”

Yes indeed it is science! That’s not the only shit that Brother Jim is selling. But instead - Jim is also hawking emergency survival kits.

Jim Bakker of PTL fame is back. Or, rather, he's been back, you were probably just unaware of it. This time, instead of timeshares on the campus of PTL, a thrilling vacation at his "Christian" theme park, and promises of reaping material rewards for donating to his "ministry," the disgraced televangelist is hawking survival gear on Christian TV.

A long expose in The Charlotte Observer details Bakker's current activities. In a nutshell, as the article succinctly states, "Jim Bakker is back on TV with a different, darker message: The Apocalypse is coming and you better get ready."

For Bakker, getting ready means sending him large amounts of money, called a "donation," and as a "thank you," he'll send you survival gear that he endorses.

Of course, you'll be forgiven if the specifics sound new and yet the overall theme of Jim Bakker's message sounds vaguely familiar to you. You can read the details of Bakker's rise and fall during the '80s by reading The Charlotte Observer article, but as the article points out, the financial information for his new "ministry" is shrouded in mystery. In other words, like in the '80s, people are apparently sending Bakker money without any real accountability for where the money goes and how it's used.

But here is how Brother Jim is selling this – and I think even the good LAWRD JAYSUS would want this because he is the creator of all that is good and holy! But not buying his shit will apparently cause cannibalism!

End Times prepper pastor Jim Bakker used his television program again today to promote his line of survival products, urging viewers to stock up now because people will be forced to resort to cannibalism when the Last Days arrive.

Complaining that he has “been so lambasted in the last few years” for endlessly promoting his End Times survival products, Bakker lashed out, warning that “the Bible says a fool sees trouble coming and doesn’t prepare.”

“In perilous times, they do crazy things,” Bakker said, adding that he has “cried so much” over the destruction wrought on Houston by Hurricane Harvey.

“I saw wonderful people with everything gone,” Bakker wept. “Everything gone! You don’t understand everything gone! You don’t understand living in darkness unless you’ve lived in darkness. And they will kill each other, eat each other, steal everything from each other and that’s what the Bible warns about. I want you to be prepared.”

See here’s where you don’t give a crackpot a microphone and a license to sell crap that nobody wants – he will use it for evil instead of good. Because Brother Jim sells emergency kits and then, THEN claims that he can see into the future and that it will be a bleak one! Gee, I wonder why? Maybe Jim can tell me the plot of Avengers 4 at least?

Jim Bakker is making headlines again three years after his “Praise the Lord” (PTL) empire near Charlotte collapsed amid financial corruption and sexual scandal. Now, instead of rebuilding his 2,300 acre Christian theme park and resort, Heritage USA, Bakker is selling supplies for the coming apocalypse. “We are in the final days,” Bakker says.

While Bakker claims that he has abandoned his previous lifestyle in favor of coming to a truer understanding of Christ, plenty of people remember that his theme park and TV show funded an opulent lifestyle filled with vacation homes, expensive cars and an air-conditioned doghouse. There are questions about whether Bakker truly repented after serving five years in prison for fraud or if he is merely capitalizing on 21st century fears such as terrorism and climate change. His new TV show, “The Jim Bakker Show,” certainly works hard to sell fuel-less generators, doomsday guidebooks and freeze-dried food with a shelf life of up to 30 years. Bakker, however, insists that the twin disasters of Hurricane Harvey and Maria and concerns of nuclear war with North Korea are signs that the end times are on the horizon, and that Christians ignore the warnings at their own risk. “One day,” Bakker says, “you’re going to shake your fist in God’s face and you’re going to say, ‘God, why didn’t you warn me?’ He’s going to say, ‘You sat there and you made fun of Jim Bakker all those years. I warned you. But you didn’t listen.’ ”

Read more at http://www.beliefnet.com/columnists/news/2018/02/jim-bakker-says-apocalypse-coming-proof.php#tXjqvltAWWbA37J0.99

Now because all good food comes in bucket form – we here at the Holy Church Of The Top 10 have actually acquired some food of theirs to taste. And we recommend that you do not try this at home! Can we show the flyer first?

Now we here have a wide variety of stuff that comes in that magical bucket! I mean look at that – you have pizza, you have fried chicken, mac & cheese, coleslaw – it’s essentially KFC for those that believe in the doomsday apocalypse! Let’s try some. Mmmmmmmmmmm…. Yeah!

Like other Religious Right leaders, Bakker is a zealous supporter of President Trump. Bakker said a few weeks ago that criticism of Trump was a sign that “America is in a war against God.” Last year Bakker warned that God’s judgment would fall on anyone who interfered with divine plans to use Trump to save America. Bakker has also warned that people will have to answer to God for making fun of him.

In his new pitch, Bakker warns his followers that the “popular and delicious Tasty Food Bucket is going to be discontinued at the end of April due to cost of the ingredients. Many of these recipes will never be offered in a configuration like this again! Some recipes may even be retired.”

The colorful flyer included with the letter spells out four offers, from the single food bucket available for a gift of $175 to Bakker’s ministry (374 servings) all the way up to the special Time of Trouble Officer of 28 Tasty Pantry Deluxe Plus Buckets (10,472 servings) that can be yours for a $3,700 contribution.

Says Bakker, “We believe in preparing because God has warned us to prepare.”

You know what? Excuse me a minute! So there we have it, we have dedicated this week to exposing the end times crap that Brother Jim hath been hawking! Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Matt Bevin
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Spin it to win it! Wheel goes round, wheel goes round… and it lands on… oh look it’s another clip without context!

Well I guess Satan is my father then! Spin it again! and it lands on… People Who Somehow Got Elected Hit it!

Politicians at the state and local who are so terrible, you can’t help but wonder how they keep managing to win elections. This is:

This week we’re going to my old Kentucky home to profile governor Matt Bevin. Because, whew, he is certifiably insane. So if you haven’t been following the news lately, first off, what are you doing paying attention to our show? Go read some actual news! But second, the Koch Brothers’ reckless policies have ravaged most of middle America, and the state of Kentucky is no exception. There has been a massive teacher strike going on and Mr. Bevin has made some, well, less than sensitive comments about it.

Kentucky Gov. Matt Bevin says children were left vulnerable to harm, sexual assault and drugs as a result of public school closures throughout the state Friday to allow teachers and supporters to protest at the state's Capitol.
"I guarantee you somewhere in Kentucky today a child was sexually assaulted that was left at home because there was nobody there to watch them," the Republican governor told reporters Friday afternoon, according to CNN affiliate WDRB.
"I guarantee you somewhere today, a child was physically harmed or ingested poison because they were home alone because a single parent didn't have any money to take care of them."
Bevin went on to say that "some were introduced to drugs for the first time because they were vulnerable and left alone."

CNN has reached out to Bevin's communications director. The governor's press secretary did not immediately return CNN's request for comment Saturday morning.

Yes, that was a horribly insensitive comment to make. And what is it about Christian fundamentalists where their mind just goes to the most horrifying sex crimes they can think of? What are they trying to tell us? One minute their god is a loving god and the next minute their god is your creepy, racist redneck uncle. Same goes for Matt Bevin.

Kentucky's Republican governor says a judge who ruled against him is an incompetent hack.

Multiple media outlets report Gov. Matt Bevin criticized Franklin County Circuit Judge Phillip Shepherd in a radio interview on WKRC-AM in Cincinnati. Monday, Shepherd denied Bevin's request to take depositions from the staff of the state attorney general's office and the Kentucky Education Association. Both have sued Bevin in an effort to block implementation of a bill making changes to the state's pension system.

It's not the first time Bevin has criticized the judge. Two years ago, he referred to Shepherd as a "political hack" and has said Kentucky should consider changing how judges are selected. Currently, judges in Kentucky are elected in nonpartisan elections.

This is absolutely hilarious. The guy who is the incompetent hack is calling somebody else an incompetent hack. Hypocrisy, thy name is Matt Bevin. And guess what? He recently gave a free ride to the billionaire class.

Republicans in Kentucky's state legislature overturned Gov. Matt Bevin's (R) vetoes of their tax overhaul and budget plan Friday, capping a dramatic confrontation between members of the same party that has also seen thousands of teachers descend on the state Capitol in protests for better pay.

The impasse between the governor and the Republican lawmakers kicked off earlier this month, when the state legislature unveiled a tax package to dramatically cut income and business taxes in the state. The plan aimed to pay for those cuts by dramatically increasing sales taxes, leading one analysis to project that it would wind up raising taxes on all but the wealthiest 5 percent of state residents.

Meanwhile, the state's legislature separately approved a budget that raised the state's per-pupil funding to $4,000, from $3,700, amid intense pressure from teachers who demonstrated at the Capitol and throughout the state after Bevin vetoed both measures.

Republicans in the state legislature defended the tax measure, in part, as necessary to avoid deeper cuts to education and to fund teachers' pensions, with nonpartisan staff in Kentucky's House of Representatives saying that the tax package would generate an additional $239 million in state revenue in 2019 and an extra $248 million in 2020.

Yes we can hear the boos right now. States are strapped for cash to fund the very things its’ residents need to survive, but let’s give tax breaks to the upper 1% that don’t need them. Right. But the pension debate has enraged voters. If you vote the way Fox News tells you to vote, you’re going to get screwed, that’s science.

FRANKFORT — It was probably no coincidence that on the first business day after the General Assembly left town, Gov. Matt Bevin tried to serve notice that it is he who rules Kentucky.

Bevin’s Monday appointment of seven new members to the state’s 11-member school board forced the Tuesday resignation of Education Commissioner Stephen Pruitt and his replacement with an advocate for charter schools – enterprises that the legislature approved last year but declined to fund this year, amid a debate about funding for public schools.

It remains to be seen just how far Bevin, the board and leading new member Hal Heiner will go, beyond taking over Jefferson County Public Schools. But the last two weeks in Frankfort have made a few things clear: Bevin has no respect for public-school teachers who made legislators reject his proposed cuts to education; he has about as much regard for the legislature; and the feeling is mostly mutual.

Yes, he is bad and he should feel bad. But things like apologies and public appearances are something that republicans just shouldn’t do. In fact here’s what happened when Matt Bevin appeared at a recent Kentucky parade:

The governor, wearing a hot pink blazer, waved to parade attendees while running. It is unknown why Bevin started the jog, but he eventually slowed down to a walking pace in the brief video.

Bevin has seen his approval rating slide in recent months. An April Western Kentucky poll showed only 32 percent of people approve of his job performance while 56 disapproved. This comes after a tumultuous legislative session where Republican lawmakers overrode both his budget and tax vetoes.

The governor was mostly smiles during the event, even stopping to take one of his well-known group selfies with some of the attendees.

Yeah it was kind of like that. That’s Kentucky governor Matt Bevin. Yet another one of the:

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[font size="8"]Alex Jones
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Let’s give the wheel a good strong spin shall we? And it lands on… ‘Merica! Fuck yeah!


Spin it again! And it lands on… Infowars. OK seriously I have to say that when I saw this story last week I about fell off my chair laughing. You know Alex, you should never fall asleep watching Terminator 2, because it can seriously fuck with your head. And I love that franchise. Yeah even Terminator: Genisys, as shitty as it was, was still a Terminator movie, damn it! But before we show you the story, let’s play the video because it is exquisite.

Excuse me a minute… Yeah so Alex thinks that there’s a rogue AI that’s going to kill a whole lots of people. Now this has been a staple talking point in movies like the Terminator, AI, I:Robot, Brazil, Avengers: Age Of Ultron, and a whole slew of others. And of course Futurama.

Before Alex Jones headed to court to face his ex-wife today, he told Infowars listeners that President Trump is part of an effort to fight against a sentient computer program that has decided to kill all humans.

This afternoon, Jones was speaking with a guest on his show when he declared that we are living in an “information apocalypse” where global elites “want to keep you in-the-moment confused.” Then, seemingly out of nowhere, he claimed that Trump is working with a group of people to defeat an automated intelligence computer program set on destroying humanity.

“This is already an A.I. system that made the decision to have a post-human world and Trump has jumped in with others and are saying, ‘No, we’re not doing it,’ at the elite level,” Jones said.

He quickly moved on, unfazed, and added that global elites “are really pissed about” Infowars “questioning the next false flag,” referring to his network’s infamous tendency to claim tragedies are staged events.

But here’s my favorite part of this whole story is that Alex didn’t just call out the fact that there’s a murderous AI out to kill everybody! He’s got the one guy who can save us all from it! Yup – you guessed it!

Infowars’ Alex Jones announced out of nowhere on Friday that President Donald Trump is fighting a sentient artificial intelligence program that has turned on its human creators and wants to kill us all.

Right Wing Watch reported that prior to a court appearance with his ex-wife, Jones announced the president’s valorous intentions during a tangent about the current “information apocalypse” undertaken by “global elites” who want to keep the world “confused.”

“This is already an A.I. system that made the decision to have a post-human world,” the Infowars host said, “and Trump has jumped in with others and are saying, ‘No, we’re not doing it,’ at the elite level.”

Jones did not cite where he’d acquired his knowledge before adding that an apparent different group of elites “are really pissed about” Infowars because the conspiracy theorist program is in the business of “questioning the next false flag” — a reference to Jones and his company’s claims that massive tragedies are really government-sponsored attempts to shape public discourse.

So you know that wasn’t the only piece of bat feces that Jones has been flinging lately. You know we’ve been talking a lot about Kanye West over the last couple of weeks. You know there’s that old adage about separating the art from the artist, but when Kanye goes on Infowars there really isn’t much separation to do. He really is that crazy!

Alex Jones, the nation’s leading conspiracy theorist and creator of Infowars, said in a livestream last night that “Kanye West is saying the same thing” as he is and that it is “self-evident” that he and the rapper share a common purpose.

Yesterday, West made news again after he continued his vocal support for President Trump and tweeted a photo of himself wearing a “Make America Great Again” hat.

Conservative media figures have fawned over West’s open support of President Trump. Earlier this week, Jones said he admired West’s “bold moves against the thought police” and apologized for previously assuming West was “a Democrat and a globalist.” In wake of yesterday’s news, Jones said one of the Infowars producers had told him that his “mission is the same” as West’s, to which he agreed.

“He goes, ‘He wants to break people out of their programming and you want to break people out of their conditioning, is the term you use.’ That’s a more psychological term—that’s what they call it. The globalists have conditioned us, globalist conditioning to be these scared people that have chips on our shoulders that are victims all the time,” Jones said.

But it’s good to know that even someone as crazy as Kanye West has his limits! Because if you’re too crazy for Kanye, that’s pretty fucking crazy!

Kanye West did not appear on Infowars, as Alex Jones claimed he would on Twitter Wednesday. Refinery29 has reached out to West's representatives for comment and will update this post should we hear back.
This story was originally published on May 2, 2018.
It turns out that Kanye West proclaiming his love of Donald Trump wasn't even close to the most controversial thing the rapper could do this month. The "Black Skinhead" rapper has a new platform for his philoso-ye, and apparently, it's on conspiracy theorist Alex Jones' Infowars.
On Wednesday, May 2, West is scheduled to appear on Jones' live show in order to explain comments he made to TMZ Live about how slavery was a "choice." It's a decision so profoundly odd that I'm unsure how West — or his wife, Kim Kardashian — will explain it.
No matter how you feel about West's latest tweets or declarations of "free thinking," aligning himself with Jones is a dramatic step that I'm not sure he can come back from. This is not a case of West bridging a political gap: It's him condoning a man who spreads not just false information, but damaging and cruel lies that have directly affected some of the most vulnerable.

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[font size="8"]I Need A Drink
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Spin that shit! Come on no whammy no whammy no whammy stop!!! And it lands on… oh look it’s another clip without context!

Boy the fundies sure do love being dominated, don’t they? Spin it again! It’s now time for:

Yes I need a drink this week! And man this week has got particularly dark. So tell me, bartender, what goes well with the Royal Wedding? Elton John’s tears in a glass? Yeah I think that might be impossible to obtain. Since we are talking about the royal wedding, just bring me some tall boys of Boddingtons Lager – that’s some good shit! So the Royal Wedding between Prince Harry and Megan Markle is happening on May 19th. And we’re going to do you the favor and show you how you can turn the forthcoming Royal Wedding into a money making opportunity! Because this is 2018 we’re talking about here. For one thing if you live in London and you happen to own a company that manufactures high end wedding invitations you are gettin’ paid!

We may not know the exact price of the invitations, but we do know the May 19 wedding is on track to cost an estimated $2.8 million, according to the U.K.-based wedding planning app Bridebook. Experts in the U.S. have their own guesses about the invitations’ value.

Sarah Sadler, a client coordinator with New York printer Bella Figura, tells MONEY that she thinks printing 600 of Harry and Markle’s invitations probably cost about $7,500. With inserts or envelopes, the total was likely about $10,000.

The bulk of the cost came from the die stamping, also called engraving. Sadler said it’s more expensive than letterpress because “it requires a lot more work and a lot more high-end materials.” It’s an older, traditional process that involves someone making each invitation by hand.

Die stamping isn’t easy. Small likely had to keep checking the color and making sure the pressure was consistent. She also likely had to print double the amount of invitations just to get 600 good ones to send out.

Of course Seinfeld has taught us that you never go cheap on wedding invitations! So that’s just one of many possibilities that you can make money on. But for us average chumps – there’s always one of my favorite things that come up at times like this – the prop bet! I love some good prop bets! And there are some awesome ones for the Royal Wedding:

Royal watchers have been abuzz with anticipation following the recent announcement that Prince Harry will soon tie the knot with American actress Meghan Markle. Naturally, that enthusiasm has spread to the entertainment betting odds, where a host of proposition wagers are now available covering the happy couple’s impending nuptials and future children.

Currently fifth in the line of succession to the British throne, Harry played a very active role in the wedding of his older brother, Prince William, to Kate Middleton in April 2011. William broke with royal tradition at his wedding by having Harry stand with him as best man.

Little brother is widely expected to return the favor at his wedding next spring, making William a heavy -3300 favorite to be Harry’s best man, while Tom Inskip, a close boyhood friend of the prince, trails at +800.

Far more mystery surrounds which musical artist will be the wedding performer at what is expected to be one of the most watched events of 2018. Singer/songwriter Elton John enjoyed a close personal relationship with Harry’s mother, Diana, and is warmly remembered for his rendition of Candle in the Wind at the funeral of the People’s Princess in September 1997.

The 70-year-old star leads a star-studded list of British artists as a +125 favorite to serenade the happy couple on their big day, followed by pop star Ed Sheeran, who is pegged at +400 after publicly stating his desire to get the gig, while Grammy Award-winning singer Adele trails at +800.

And why wouldn’t Elton John be the favorite of the Royal Family? Well if gambling isn’t your thing, there’s always merchandising! Why place money on odds if the house always wins? And in this case it’s the royal house! Even Las Vegas and London can’t help but get in on some of that sweet prop betting action:

There are several more Royal Wedding betting markets which could prove popular with punters as there is a semblance of value to be had. Alas the markets on the wedding date has now closed – May 2018 was an odds-on favourite from the moment the engagement was announced.

And the Royal Wedding odds on the venue were only opened for a short time – one day after announcing their engagement, Buckingham Palace has announced that Prince Harry and Meghan Markle will be married in St. George’s Chapel at Windsor Castle.

However, the invite list makes for some fascinating Royal Wedding bet opportunities. As it is 5/4 Elton John will perform at the wedding, the 1/25 about him attending the event is something of a gimme.

At the other end of the scale 50/1 about Donald Trump attending should have a nought or two added to it. But Paddy Power’s 3/1 about the Sky F1 reporter Natalie Pinkham smacks of a good thing.

It may have once been reported Prince Harry and Pinkham shared a kiss but that was over a decade ago. The former World Poker Tour presenter has since got married and become a mother. More importantly she is a very close friend of Mike Tindall and Zara Tindall (nee Phillips), Prince Harry’s aunty.

So if prop bets aren’t your thing there’s always making money selling stupid shit! Yes, as the great Mel Brooks said in the movie Spaceballs – the real money being made is in merchandising!

In the King and Queen Gift Shop at the foot of Windsor's Castle Hill, Harry and Meghan memorabilia have been flying off the shelves. Tourists have been snapping up fridge magnets, T-shirts, tea towels and mugs bearing images of the happy couple and costing $18 or more. Margaret Tyler from London was in Windsor recently adding to her collection of royal souvenirs.

“I’ve already got about 10,000 at home. Everything you can imagine, from mugs and plaques and figurines, covering several generations of royals. I’ve got so much that there’s hardly any room to move around my house. I’ve got a sofa, a television and a little kitchen. I haven’t got room for anything else,” Tyler said. “Nevertheless, I’m still looking for more commemorative items. I love the royal family.”

The royal wedding has triggered an avalanche of royal tat, including some bizarre products like the Harry and Meghan breakfast cereal, and the aim is obvious: to make a quick buck.

But in tune with the socially aware image that the young couple has been energetically projecting, there’s been an effort to link this demand for souvenirs to a charitable cause. “For Richer, For Poorer” is the result. This is a new brand of souvenirs, launched by a group of design and marketing consultants, and aimed at raising funds for the homeless of Windsor. Giulia Watson of Revolt Communications leads the project.

So at least the money there is going to a good cause, but people love merchandise for things. And only in England would you see a merch booth outside Westminster Abbey on Royal Wedding day, because, reasons, and money. Even if you own property in London you’re in luck!

Windsor residents are renting out their homes over the royal wedding weekend for extremely high prices.

One two-bedroom property that sleeps four is listed on Airbnb as being “located perfectly for the royal wedding” – and it costs £3,195 for the night.

The host is just one of many homeowners capitalising on public interest in the upcoming nuptials of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle by renting out their properties at increased prices.

On Airbnb, various homes are listed as “luxury royal wedding accommodation” and are going for more than £2,000 a night.

Other people are merely renting out spare rooms in their Windsor houses – although these are still going for increased rates.

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[font size="8"]Stupidest State Contest: Round 2 Week 4
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Let’s spin the wheel one last time this week! And it lands on… t-shirt cannon! Everyone here will get the new official Top 10 Stupidest State t-shirt. See how it has that on the front and our schedule on the back? Now if only I had the budget to make and sell t-shirts! Spin it again! Stupidest State 2018! Hit it!

16 states will enter, but only one will be crowned the new Top 10 Conservative Idiots Stupidest State!

Welcome back! I hope you all filled out your brackets! Round 1 of the tournament is over and man there have been some exciting developments. Last week we were live at Moda Center in Portalnd and it was an absolute bloodbath as Kentucky absolutely put on a show and completely routed Virginia by a whopping 25 points to take the Batshit Conference. This week we’re live at the beautiful new home of the Sacramento Kings, Golden 1 Center in Sacramento, California and this week it’s a battle of greed vs more greed as West Virginia’s coal barons take on Wisconsin, sponsored by Koch Industries, for the Fiscal Irresponsibility Championship! Only one will win and go on to face Kentucky and the loser will go home. So who will it be this week? Let’s find out!

[font size="6"]Fiscal Irresponsibility Championship: Wisconsin Vs West Virginia [/font]

[font size="4"]Wisconsin[/font]

Wisconsin. You know them as the home of the Green Bay Packers. The football team responsible for the famous Lambeau Leap and of course the cheesehead. It’s also the home of the Milwaukee Brewers and the Milwaukee Bucks. Wisconsin is also home to some of the best beer in the world which includes the famous Miller Brewery and other breweries like New Glarus and Stevens Point Brewery. But farm country is also home to some of the craziest politicians in the world. After all, when all you got is nothing but farmland for miles and miles, politics is really your only form of entertainment. And Wisconsin is the state that has given us Paul Ryan and Scott Walker. But you know what Wisconsin is entangled in right now? A massive teacher protest!

Cathy Myers, a Janesville School Board Member and Democrat running for Congress in Wisconsin’s 1st District, announced the launch of Teachers and Students for Cathy.

The program, which will employ students and teachers as summer organizers, is the campaign’s newest initiative to mobilize and engage voters in the district now represented by House Speaker Paul Ryan.

Myers faces Randy Bryce in the Democratic primary set for August.

“As a parent, and a teacher, I know that our public education system is crucially important — and now, it’s under repeated attacks by Donald Trump and Betsy DeVos," Myers said in a news release. "I’m running for Congress to bring an educator’s perspective to the halls of the Capitol and protect public education from the Trump administration’s shameful attacks."

She added, “I’m thrilled to have the support of teachers and students in Wisconsin’s 1st District, and I know that their perspective is invaluable. That’s why I’m relying on them to help us carry this campaign across the finish line.”

Now let’s switch gears and talk about Wisconsin’s governor – Scott Walker. Yeah I can already hear the boos, so go ahead and let it out! Remember during the Bush years when Bush gave that strange $300 tax break and nobody knew what to do with it? Well, Walker is trying the same thing!

Scott Walker is about to give every family in Wisconsin a $100 check for each child that it’s raising — an economically incoherent policy that’s clearly intended to bribe voters into giving the governor a third term.

And Democratic officeholders should really be implementing more policies like it.

But before we get that point, let’s take a closer look at the “Badger-State Buyoff.” Thanks to a combination of Walker’s spending cuts and good economic times, Wisconsin currently boasts a budget surplus. It also has one of the most depleted rainy-day funds of any U.S. state. Thus, it would seem fiscally prudent to put the surplus into that emergency reserve — or else, into public investments that would pay long-term dividends for the state, such as infrastructure or public education.

But Walker is more concerned with political prudence, at the moment. A series of Democratic upsets in recent Wisconsin special elections has the governor afraid of drowning in a blue wave this November. And if he wants to alert the public to the “fact” that his superior economic management has produced a budget surplus, investing the excess funds in programs that will pay off years from now won’t cut it. He needed something splashy, and instantly gratifying — like say, by setting up a website where every Wisconsinite with kids can claim $100 checks:

So that is happening. The republicans are so desperate to hang onto their positions, despite that they don’t do anything and blame it on the other guy, that they are resorting to these kinds of measures. And Scott Walker is so toxic that he’s not even welcome at his own party gatherings! Thanks Koch Brothers!
MADISON, Wis. — Last week, Gov. Scott Walker was featured at a Milwaukee event hosted by America First Policies, an affiliated arm of the the America First Super PAC. Last week was a busy one for the Trump-Pence aligned group. In addition to hosting Walker, the group’s advocacy director, Carl Higbie, made a media appearance in which he defended his racist statements that “… the black race as a whole, not totally, is lazier than the white race, period” and Black women believe, “breeding is a form of employment.”

Angela Lang, Executive Director of Black Leaders Organizing for Communities (BLOC) responded saying, ”Higbie’s disgusting comments unfortunately are a symptom of the white supremacy that has been boiling over since the Trump administration began. Walker’s silence on these reprehensible comments show that Walker has never stood with or cared about the Black community in Wisconsin.”

America First Director of Advocacy Carl Higbie worked as a radio host before joining the Trump administration. During his time on the air he espoused appalling racist sentiments including those characterizing the “black race” as “lazier than the white race.” He left the Trump administration after his comments were reported and moved into his current position in the pro Trump-Pence group.

And you know what else Wisconsin is going to be the future home of? Foxconn! Yes, the Chinese conglomerate that manufactures just about anything you use with an on / off switch and is universally known for egregious human rights violations, is coming to America! And one guy is looking to give the controversial company a boost!


Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker is scheduled to take part in an announcement Monday about site development for the Foxconn Technology Group campus in the southeast corner of the state.

The governor's press office says Walker will join business owners and workers from across Wisconsin for announcements planned in Black River Falls, Brownsville and Racine.

Foxconn expects to begin construction soon on a $10 billion flat-screen plant in Mount Pleasant.

The Wisconsin Department of Natural Resources recently approved four air permits for the manufacturing complex and a request to pull millions of gallons of water daily from Lake Michigan to serve the new plant.

[font size="4"]West Virginia [/font]

Coal mining country is huge in West Virginia. So much that it’s pretty engrained into their culture and state. But for this entry we’re going to take a look at one senate candidate in particular. That’s former coal mining CEO Don Blankenship. Mr. Blankenship was the CEO of Massey Energy – the coal mining operation whose reckless disregard for workplace safety caused the entrapment and eventual deaths of 29 miners back in 2009. Now that he’s out of prison, he thinks he’s got a shot at the United States Senate, and this is funny coming from a guy, who, in the past, and I’m quoting directly – once accused Senate politicians of not doing enough to regulate coal mining safety! To which I’m sure his employees gave him a gigantic middle finger. Well let’s delve into this further.

WASHINGTON — President Trump intervened Monday in the West Virginia Republican Senate primary, pleading with voters a day before the election to oppose the former mine operator Don Blankenship, and suggesting that Mr. Blankenship’s nomination would lead to a replay of the party’s embarrassing loss last year in Alabama.

Responding to the requests of party leaders who fear a win for Mr. Blankenship in the primary would all but ensure the re-election of Senator Joe Manchin II, a Democrat, Mr. Trump echoed those fears in a tweet aimed at West Virginians.

“Don Blankenship currently running for Senate, can’t win the General Election in your State…No way!” Mr. Trump wrote. “Remember Alabama. Vote Rep. Jenkins or A.G. Morrisey.”

Let’s think about this here for a minute. Remember back in 2017 – I know that seems like a fucking eternity ago but it was really only last fucking year – when Trump campaigned for Luther Strange in Alabama, which gave us Roy Moore, which gave us Doug Jones? If you could bet on elections, I would bet big money that this has the potential to backfire on Trump! So what happens when your own party rejects you? Run third of course!

Ex-coal CEO and West Virginia senate candidate Don Blankenship says he will not rule out a third party bid in the West Virginia senate race, if Attorney General Patrick Morrisey wins the Republican nomination Tuesday. "I have not ruled out anything," Blankenship told CBS News on Sunday, adding, "I've said that I cannot let him win because of the opioid connection and planned parenthood connection."

Blankenship has repeatedly stated on the campaign trail that Morrisey is at fault for the opioid epidemic in West Virginia, and vows he will not support the attorney general if chosen as the Republican nominee. "Mr. Morrisey has been less than truthful about his involvement with the drug companies," Blankenship said, noting that an independent bid might be the most viable option in the general election race against current West Virginia senator Democrat Joe Manchin.

But Blankenship's threat may ring hollow. West Virginia law contains a "sore loser" clause barring candidates that lose in a party primary from running as an independent for the same post. It's not clear how or if he could ever run such a campaign in the Stare of West Virginia.

Remember when Trump promised to “drain the swamp”? You can’t exactly drain the swamp if the drain was clogged to begin with! So you can’t keep a good conservative down. When they are circling the drain, they just plug the drain back up! I mean Blankenship is every bit of a criminal as the rest of them, and add a dash of hardcore racism to that!

Washington (CNN)West Virginia GOP Senate candidate Don Blankenship defended on Tuesday his use of the term "Chinaperson" to describe the father-in-law of Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell.

During a Fox News GOP primary debate, Blankenship said his earlier use of the term "wealthy Chinaperson" to describe the father of McConnell's wife, Transportation Secretary Elaine Chao, is not racist.

"This idea that calling someone a 'Chinaperson' -- I mean, I'm an American-person -- I don't see this insinuation by the press that there is something racist about saying a 'Chinaperson,'" Blankenship said. "Some people are Korean-persons, some people are African-persons — it's not any slander there."

James Chao, McConnell's father-in-law, was born in China, but moved to the United States before starting the Foremost Group, a shipping company, in New York. Blankenship has said McConnell is "soft on China" and that his marriage to Elaine Chao raises "the potential for conflict of interest."

Maybe Donnie was just channeling his inner Walter Sobchak! Although he doesn’t exactly strike me as the kind of guy who would ever watch “The Big Lebowski”. Oh and here’s the thing about this election that might shock you. At least Roy Moore lived in Alabama. Guess where Mr. Blankenship lives?

KEYSER, W.Va. — Don Blankenship is running for the United States Senate as a proud West Virginian with Appalachian roots, but his primary residence is a $2.4 million villa with palm trees and an infinity pool near Las Vegas.

Mr. Blankenship, a Republican loyalist of President Trump, is running an America First-style campaign and calls himself an “American competitionist,” but he admires China’s state-controlled economy and has expressed interest in gaining Chinese citizenship.

The former coal mining executive is widely known for spending a year in prison for his role in a mining explosion that claimed 29 lives. Yet ahead of the May 8 primary election, he is running as a champion of miners and has bought TV ads that challenge settled facts about his role in the disaster.

And even as Mr. Blankenship seeks to join the Republican majority in Washington, a “super PAC” linked to the party establishment is attacking him as a “convicted criminal” and a hypocrite.

[font size="4"]And the winner is… [/font]

Wow, this was a close matchup – but in the end Wisconsin pulled it out in the 2nd half and went up on West Virginia by a score of 10. Sorry West Virginia, you put up a good fight but only one team can move on, and Wisconsin wins the game by a score of 76 – 65. Wisconsin wins the Fiscal Irresponsibility conference and will move on to play Kentucky in the final four! Cut the net guys, you earned it!

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

We’re live from a stadium that has hosted many Final Fours – the Fabulous Forum in Inglewood, California! We have the four corners of conservativism represented. God, guns, greed, and batshit insanity. Florida vs Missouri for the Layover League, Kentucky vs Wisconsin for the Flyover League. The winners will move on to the championship!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]A Perfect Circle[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen, my next guests have a great new album out called “Eat The Elephant”, you can see them on tour everywhere this fall. Playing their song called “The Doomed”, give it up for A Perfect Circle!

See you next week!


Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: City National Grove Of Anaheim, Anaheim, CA
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Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

May 2, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-16: My Beautiful Dark Twisted MAGA Fantasy Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-16: My Beautiful Dark Twisted MAGA Fantasy Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! For more information, see our ad in Golf Digest Magazine! So I think I may have found the perfect race for the rest of us who aren’t exactly what one would call physically fit. This takes place in the town of Boerne, Texas. So it starts out with a pint of beer – already they speak my language, and it ends with a pint of beer. But here’s my favorite part of the race – there is a coffee and donuts station about halfway through the race! Because what says “5K race” more than beer, coffee, and donuts? I feel like this is more of a brisk walk to get coffee and donuts with the added bonus of a good, couple of pints of beer thrown in for good measure! I’m sure the physical fitness buffs in the audience will back me up here, but wouldn’t these things be contradictory to the idea of a 5k? Yes and I have participated in 5Ks. But what makes this one different is that it appeals to the most physically fit among us, and the least physically fit among us. I definitely fall into the latter category. You can tell. Yes, physical fitness is not exactly my strong point. But comedy is, well sort of. Just ask me what time I can run a full mile. Um… I’ll finish eventually! But here’s the best part – it’s not even an actual 5K run! It’s an 0.5K run, so we can eat all the donuts and drink all the beer we want, god bless America! OK that’s enough of the intro. We got a lot of idiocy to get to. But first we got to play Bill Maher’s new rules segment from last week where he had an open letter to Roseanne and made some really excellent points:

In the number one slot this week we’re going to recap the shit show that followed the White House Correspondents Dinner (1) because conservatives still don’t understand how comedy works. In the second slot, we’re going to talk about the end of the Korean War. Yes, nearly 50+ years of conflict is coming to a formal end this week, but should Trump get all the credit for it? No! Especially when we have far greater threats to worry about. Taking the third slot this week, we’re going to talk about the burgeoning bromance between Trump (3) and Kanye West. Yes, Kanye is back and well he hasn’t really changed much. At number four is the Groper’s Club (4). So Bill Cosby finally got convicted of first degree sexual assault over last week, but the day after, Charlie Rose announced a new show where he reveals the real victims of MeToo – the men. Yeah cry me a river. In the fifth slot we have a new installment of “This Fucking Guy” and we’re going to profile Trump’s new Secretary Of State Mike Pompeo. If you thought Rex Tillerson was scary, you ain’t seen nothing yet! At number 6 is our now weekly investigative piece Top 10 Investigates (6) and this week we’re going to talk cults. They have been in the news a lot lately thanks to Smallville actress Allison Mack, and we’re going to go deep inside the NXIVM cult at the center of this controversy. At number 7 is of course our weekly sermon of all things holy, Holy Shit, and this week, among other things, we’re going to talk about the closing of Memories Pizza. Yes, the pizza parlor at the center of the country’s biggest gay wedding controversy is now just a memory. Fuck you, I’m not filing that, I’ve been waiting a week to make that joke, sir! Taking the 8th slot this week is Ford Motor Company (8). So their new CEO announced a bold new decision by Ford executives to take the money and run. Yes, we’ll explain more. At number 9 (NEIN!!!!) is a new installment of People Are Dumb, because, well, People Are Dumb. Finally this week we’re live at the home of the Portland Trailblazers – Portland’s Moda Center! This week it’s the Batshit Conference Championship. Will Kentucky prevail and advance to the Final Four, or will Virginia continue their Cinderella story? Plus it’s the final week of our punk month and we have a live performance for you from the one and only Rancid! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]White House Correspondents Dinner Recap
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So who else enjoyed watching the shit show that followed Michelle Wolf’s epic ownage of the room at the White House Correspondents Dinner? I know I did. See here’s the first rule of comedy, conservatives, and any comedian will tell you this – don’t dish it out if you can’t take it. And no one dishes it out on a regular basis quite like conservatives. They call us “libtard” and tell us to go eat Tide Pods on a regular basis. And they can’t really go crying to mama when we fight them back.

Trump-era White House Correspondents' dinners are somewhat subdued affairs—our thin-skinned president is off basking in the adoration of his base at a rally, and the stars who studded the event during the Obama years are nowhere to be found. Enter former Daily Show contributor Michelle Wolf, who offered a truly no-holds-barred attack on the Trump administration.

"Like a pornstar says when she’s about to have sex with a Trump," she opened, "Let’s get this over with." Wolf worked her way through the litany Trump administration disgraces, touching on the Roy Moore scandal, the revolving door of cabinet officials, and Don Jr.'s impressively slick mane.

Wolf's routine was raunchier than that of her predecessors. She was reluctant to talk about Russia and collusion, she said, as there were many members of the liberal media in the audience. "And I've never really wanted to know what any of you look like when you orgasm. Except for maybe you, Jake Tapper."

She also described the MeToo movement as "probably the reason I'm here."

I’m sure Trump was doing that too. But see conservatives you already broke the first rule of comedy. And here’s the whole underlying irony of this whole thing – remember back in the 2016 election when Trump fans – railing against “snowflakes” wore these shirts?

Yeah those people have literally turned into the whiny crybabies they claim to despise! Irony has now come full circle in this administration! So where was Trump if you may ask? Well I answer you:

President Donald Trump has heaped more criticism on comedian Michelle Wolf for her divisive performance at Saturday’s White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner, calling her “filthy” and suggesting the annual event be canceled.

“The White House Correspondents’ Dinner was a failure last year, but this year was an embarrassment to everyone associated with it,” the President tweeted on Sunday night. “The filthy ‘comedian’ totally bombed (couldn’t even deliver her lines-much like the Seth Meyers weak performance). Put Dinner to rest, or start over!” Trump made a reference to late-night host Seth Meyer’s 2011 performance at the dinner, in which the comedian roasted Trump.

In her scathing, 20-minute address, Wolf ripped into the Trump administration and took particular aim at White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders. She also threw barbs at Ivanka Trump, “as helpful to women as an empty box of tampons,” and Kellyanne Conway, “the perfect last name for what she does.”

Says the guy who not only didn’t watch it – went out of his way to not attend! Just like last year. The guy who roasts everyone daily can’t handle getting roasted himself. Snowflake! But my favorite part of the whole evening had to come from Dennis Miller. Yeah remember that guy? The guy who could make obscure pop culture references at the drop of a hat? Well he’s slipping a bit. And by a bit, I mean a lot!

It’s been basically accepted that once-beloved comedian Dennis Miller went through a serious personality change on 9/11, and that he’s been a reactionary since.

Miller became so enraged by the attack on the World Trade Center that he literally could not talk.

“I couldn’t put together a sentence for two weeks, much less something pithy,” he once said.

When he did start talking again, Miller mostly spit venom about terrorists.

Which perhaps makes it unsurprising that Miller did not like Michelle Wolf’s controversial, brilliant and hilarious White House Correspondents’ Dinner performance.

“What a horrid human being Michelle Wolf is. I’m going to read up on her over the next couple of days and I will have a few brutally mean jokes about her by Wednesday,” he tweeted early Sunday morning.

Yeah OK sure, Dennis. Way to improv there when you need four days to write a joke! How many obscure pop culture references are you going to cram into a Crystal Pepsi minute? Thank you! So back to the WHCD – here’s the other thing about comedy that conservatives need to learn – don’t be surprised when you get called out on your bullshit, which is what Michelle did to Trump spokeswoman and woman whose couch is most likely covered in cat hair, Sarah Huckabee Sanders.

Comedian Michelle Wolf has drawn criticism from political pundits following her comments about White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders at Saturday's White House Correspondents' Dinner.

Sanders, who was in attendance and seated on the dais as Wolf made her comments, was mocked for her job performance and also for her appearance. "Every time Sarah steps up to the podium, I get excited because I’m not sure what we’re going to get: a press briefing, a bunch of lies or divided into softball teams," the comedian said during the event. She also compared the press secretary to the villainous, dour Aunt Lydia from The Handmaid's Tale and made comments about Sanders' makeup, saying, "She burns facts then uses that ash to create the perfect smoky eye."

The comments drew the ire of several political pundits, including MSNBC's Morning Joe cohost Mika Brzezinski. "Watching a wife and mother be humiliated on national television for her looks is deplorable," Brzezinski tweeted Sunday morning. "I have experienced insults about my appearance from the president. All women have a duty to unite when these attacks happen and the WHCA owes Sarah an apology."

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[font size="8"]The End Of The Korean War
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While we were sleeping, or enjoying our post WHCD vodka-induced benders, Kim Jong Un is actually taking steps to avoid a nuclear war in North Korea with Donald Trump. And by conservative logic, or complete lack thereof, just the mere act of threatening war with North Korea is enough to give Trump the Nobel Peace Prize, and that isn’t just awarded to anybody.

The Korean War will be formally declared over after 65 years, the North and South have said.

At a historic summit between leaders Kim Jong-Un and Moon Jae-in, the neighbouring countries agreed they would work towards peace on the peninsula with a formal end to the conflict set to be announced later this year.

The pair agreed to bring the two countries together and establish a "peace zone" on the contested border.

The war began in 1950 and most fighting came to an end with an armistice three years later. But peace was never officially declared and the two countries have been officially at war ever since.

At their first summit in more than a decade, the two sides announced they would seek an agreement to establish "permanent" and "solid" peace on the peninsula.

"The two leaders declare before our people of 80 million and the entire world there will be no more war on the Korean peninsula and a new age of peace has begun," the official declaration sai

Damn Windows 10!!! So now guess who’s trying to take credit for ending 50+ years of conflict in one of the most dangerous zones known to man? Bet you didn’t think it was going to be him, did you? And you think you’re so smart!

SEOUL, South Korea — Several months ago, South Koreans considered President Trump as dangerous as North Korea’s leader, Kim Jong-un, as the two traded threats of nuclear annihilation.

Now, commentators and others in Seoul think Mr. Trump deserves a Nobel Prize for helping start the unexpected peace process unfolding on the divided Korean Peninsula. On Monday, South Korea’s president, Moon Jae-in, said he felt the same.

Mr. Moon’s endorsement of a Nobel for Mr. Trump, who has faced one ethical scandal after another at home, came as the South Korean leader presided over a meeting of his senior presidential staff on Monday. During the meeting, Mr. Moon received a telegram from Lee Hee-ho, a former first lady of South Korea, congratulating him for a successful summit meeting with Mr. Kim on Friday and wishing him a Nobel Peace Prize.

“It’s really President Trump who should receive it; we can just take peace,” Mr. Moon was quoted by his office as saying.

Yes, why. Let me see if I can extrapolate the logic of the Trump supporter for a minute. Trump positioned the US military to physically threaten North Korea if they didn’t disarm, and nearly brought the whole world to the brink of nuclear war. But then we learned that guy who’s been the real threat the whole time isn’t in Pyongyang, he’s in Moscow. So by that logic, yeah, I guess Trump deserves the Nobel Peace Prize, but he has about as much of a chance of winning that as I do the Powerball.

As a candidate, Donald Trump expressed support for reinstating military torture, dropping bombs on the wives and children of enemy combatants, and mass murdering Muslim prisoners of war with bullets dipped in pig’s blood. As president, he has praised police brutality, closed America’s border to Syrian refugees, defended white supremacists, demonized Central American immigrants, threatened thermonuclear war over Twitter, and endorsed extrajudicial assassinations of suspected drug users as a public health policy.

And yet, Trump’s aides believe he just might win a Nobel Peace Prize. And that notion is a tad less crazy than it sounds.

You may have trouble picturing Donald Trump as a world-historic peacemaker. But Donald Trump doesn’t. As the president contemplates his upcoming summit with Kim Jong-un, he feels confident that his unique deal-making skills will allow him to resolve the tensions that have kept the Korean peninsula in a cold war for 65 years — and led Pyongyang to cling to a nuclear arsenal at immense economic and diplomatic cost. As Axios reports:

President Trump views the North Korean crisis as his “great man” of history moment.

The big picture: He came into office thinking he could be the historic deal maker to bring peace to the Middle East. He’s stopped talking about that. There’s very little point. The peace deal looks dead and cremated. But Trump wants to sign his name even larger into the history books, and he views North Korea as his moment.

Sources close to him say he genuinely believes he — and he alone — can overcome the seemingly intractable disaster on the Korean Peninsula.

Exactly wrong! This is the guy who brought the whole world to the brink of nuclear war, alienated our allies, caused an exponential number of untold human rights violations by illegal deportation methods, appointed a far right apocalypse worshipper to be Secretary Of State, and wants to bring back Guantanamo Bay. Yet he’s worthy of a Nobel Peace Prize? GTFO!!

Sweden and Switzerland are among the places the White House is considering for an unprecedented summit between President Donald Trump and North Korean leader Kim Jong Un, according to people familiar with the matter.

Trump confirmed on Wednesday that he dispatched CIA Director Mike Pompeo to Pyongyang last month to meet with Kim in advance of the summit, which the U.S. hopes will lead to North Korea giving up its nuclear arsenal. The unannounced meeting indicates preparations are advancing for a summit that Trump said could take place by early June or sooner.

“Meeting went very smoothly and a good relationship was formed,” Trump said in a Twitter posting Wednesday morning. “Details of Summit are being worked out now. Denuclearization will be a great thing for World, but also for North Korea!”

And while on the subject of denuclearization, Trump, while you’re praising North Korea, you should be aware what your buddy Vlad has been up to! Because while we were all distracted, Vlad revealed that he has the real weapon that could kill us all! By the way if this is called “Satan 2” it really makes you wonder what happened to Satan 1 doesn’t it?

VLADIMIR Putin’s war of words with the West escalated into war games yesterday. In a show of force, the Russian president demonstrated his fearsome new Sarmat missile. Dubbed Satan 2 by Nato, it can travel at 20 times the speed of sound and carry 12 nuclear warheads up to 6,000 miles.

The test launch, shown on an “Easter message” video from the Russian defence ministry, came as Vladimir Putin ordered further cuts to Britain’s diplomatic ranks in Moscow. Meanwhile police in Salisbury are closing in on the gang behind the nerve agent poisoning of double agent Sergei Skripal, and his daughter Yulia, which has led to tit-for-tat expulsions.

In the video, the Satan 2 missile emerges from an underground silo, pauses as if hovering above the ground, and then speeds away in a cloud of white smoke. The launch was at the snow-covered Plesetsk spaceport in the northern Archangel province of Russia close to the Arctic Circle.

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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If there’s one person in this entire world who loves getting his ass kissed, it’s Donald J. Trump. if there’s another person in this world who loves getting his ass kissed, it’s Kanye West. So in case you were living under a rock, or hiding under a rock, Kanye reemerged on Twitter following a very long absence, and it’s good to know that he hasn’t changed much. Or maybe he did since he’s now a full blown Trump supporter.

Kanye West, the music producer and rapper and author of some of the most influential records of the 21st century, returned to Twitter after almost a full year away, where he’s now posting so many tweets that it’s genuinely hard to keep up with his seemingly insatiable pace.

At first, it seemed like he was just back on Twitter to announce a pair of new albums (one solo, one with longtime collaborator Kid Cudi). But it didn’t take long before he set off a firestorm of controversy that expanded to encompass a series of right-wing pundits; the creator of Dilbert; his wife, Kim Kardashian West; and the president of the United States.

Many of Kanye’s tweets have been harmless or border on impenetrable (“I no longer have a manager. I can’t be managed” and then “decentralize”). But the hip-hop star immediately kicked up outcry when he professed his admiration for several right-wing speakers — and, as he had before, President Donald Trump.

It’s about ides, bro!!!! And it’s also about information! But really, I think Kanye has gone full Tracy Jordan here. And you never go full Tracy Jordan. I mean even Tracy Jordan doesn’t go full Tracy Jordan. I mean can we play a clip of his song?

Yeah that guy won multiple Grammys! He’s a creative genius, folks! Which then this happened:


OK who are you and what have you done with @realDonaldTrump? Should we be more concerned that Kanye wants to be Trump's BFF or should we be more concerned with the fact that Trump actually took time out of his day to compliment somebody?

And we saw it even more strongly when rapper Kanye West tweeted support for Trump a few days later. A bigger star than Shania Twain, Kanye has refused to back down, and even garnered public support from his normally non-political wife, Kim Kardashian West, and from Chance The Rapper (who noted that "Black people don’t have to be Democrats,”), though Chance, like Shania Twain, later chickened out and apologized.

Kanye tweeted: “You don't have to agree with trump but the mob can't make me not love him. We are both dragon energy. He is my brother. I love everyone. I don't agree with everything anyone does. That's what makes us individuals. And we have the right to independent thought.”

And when fellow musician John Legend chided him for these statements and said he was letting down his fans, Kanye responded: “I love you John and I appreciate your thoughts. You bringing up my fans is a tactic based on fear used to manipulate my free thought.” West's new song on the subject points out that “Lot of people agree with me, but they're too scared to speak up." Which is the whole point of preference falsification.

Cause baby I’m awesome… awesome… y’all know… remember that? I know Kanye had that album “My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy”. Now let’s add a MAGA to that and it becomes “My Beautiful Dark Twisted MAGA Fantasy”. You could add that to any of his albums. “808s and MAGA Heartbreaks”, or “The MAGA College Dropout”, or “MAGA Late Registration”, or “The MAGA Life Of Pablo”. Thank you! I mean this whole bromance is crazy. But the good news is – Kanye has a new song out! I mean why tweet it when a song expresses how you feel?

This is no joke, folks.

After Kanye West seemingly trolled everyone with his “whoopdety poop scoop” song, “Lift Yourself,” the rapper dropped a legitimate track that delves further into his recent remarks about President Trump on Twitter. Just like the title suggests, his support of the current commander in chief sets up a “Ye vs. the People” mentality.

“I know Obama was heaven-sent, but ever since Trump won, it proved that I could be president,” Yeezy raps.

T.I. joins him on the track as they share dueling views. “Yeah, you can. At what cost, though?” he spits back.

“Ye vs. the People” dropped Friday on Los Angeles radio station Power 106, even before West released it in full to the masses. The song is available on Apple Music (listen below), Amazon Music Unlimited, and Tidal.

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[font size="8"]The Gropers’ Club
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So this week saw both a huge win, and subsequently a huge loss for the MeToo movement. The win came in the form of an enormous celebrity getting his ass handed to him. And the loss came from the proposal of a new TV show. Let’s talk about the win first. I’m sure everyone knew where they were last week when the verdict was announced in the Bill Cosby case. And guess what? He’s GUILTY!!!!! Yeah that is some sweet justice for you!

A Montgomery County jury has found Bill Cosby guilty of the only criminal charges to emerge from a career-ending scandal fueled by dozens of women who accused the entertainer once known as “America’s Dad” of sexual assault.

After about 13 hours of deliberation, the panel of seven men and five women on Thursday convicted him of drugging and assaulting Andrea Constand, a former Temple University employee who said she had seen Cosby as a father-figure and mentor until the early 2004 night that he accosted her at his Cheltenham Township home.

The 80-year-old entertainer could face up to 10 years in prison.

The verdict delivered the first celebrity conviction of the #MeToo era in a case that in many ways stood at its vanguard and shone a spotlight on the role sexual entitlement, a scandal-hungry media and Hollywood’s casting couch culture played in the ruin of a comedy icon.

Read more: http://www.philly.com/philly/news/cosby/bill-cosby-guilty-trial-verdict-sexual-assault-20180426.html

Damn straight. So Bill Cosby is guilty of charges of first degree sexual assault. This is some serious shit right here, and the shit just hit the fan. But you know what’s scary? The ‘Cos might not serve a single day of jail time.

(CNN)Based on his conviction this week on three assault charges, comedian and TV star Bill Cosby could be sentenced to 30 years in prison.

But legal experts said the 80-year-old certainly will spend less time than that behind bars, and there's a very real possibility that he may not ever be incarcerated.

Why? Well, it's mostly to do with his defense team's plan to appeal the guilty verdict -- likely on the grounds that the decision to allow five other accusers to testify in the trial unfairly prejudiced the jury.

Cosby's attorney, Tom Mesereau, will probably ask the court that his client be given home confinement during the appeal, which could take months or even years, CNN legal analyst Joey Jackson said.

"I think he'll ask the court and do whatever he needs to, to have his client remain out at liberty until these issues are decided, whether it was appropriate to allow all those accusers to testify, and how prejudicial and unfair would that be," Jackson said.


So now that we’ve got the good news out of the way, let’s tell you about the bad news. And this is not only bad news for the ladies involved in the horrible MeToo scandals, but also the guys too. Really, when you’re in a hole, you want to stop digging, not dig further!

Just weeks after the Hollywood Reporter published a lengthy article on Charlie Rose’s post-#MeToo life, rumors of a comeback for the former PBS and CBS news anchor are drifting into sight.

According to Page Six, there’s a pitch making the rounds for a new #MeToo atonement series. The proposed show would reportedly star Rose, who would interview some of the other prominent men who lost their jobs after being accused of sexual misconduct last fall, including Matt Lauer and Louis C.K. Tina Brown, the media celebrity who previously edited the New Yorker and Vanity Fair, confirmed to Page Six that she was approached about producing the show but declined to say who was approaching her. (She also says she declined to participate in the show.)

At this point, there’s no reason to believe that this proposed show is anywhere close to reality; it most likely exists only in the form of a pitch. But that a Charlie Rose redemption show is getting pitched to major media figures like Brown suggests there are people in the industry who are willing to test the waters for him. It suggests that there are people behind the scenes who think he’s spent enough time in exile.

Yes d’oh indeed! I mean you’re already incriminated. Don’t incriminate yourself any further guys because anything you say could potentially backfire on you. And seriously – terrible timing on whoever put this idea out there. This comes the day after the Cosby verdict! At least wait a few days before announcing something this unbelievably stupid!

The #MeToo comeback wave for disgraced men is getting bolder by the second. Last week, we got speculations about how Louis C.K. might stage his return to the comedy world, while in another corner, Matt Lauer was reportedly “testing the waters” for a comeback of his own. And now, according to Page Six, a #MeToo television series starring Charlie Rose is reportedly in the works—in which the former CBS anchor would interview other shunned men like Lauer and C.K. The question here seems obvious: who on earth is making this proposed series, and in what universe do they imagine viewers will tune in?

Rose was fired from CBS This Morning and his eponymous PBS show last fall following allegations of sexual harassment from multiple women; in a statement given at the time, Rose apologized, but denied the accuracy of some allegations. “I always felt that I was pursuing shared feelings,” Rose said, “even though I now realize I was mistaken.” Rose’s agent did not immediately respond to V.F.’s request for comment regarding the new project.

Why would anyone think a series in which Rose interviews other men who have been accused of sexual misconduct is a good or necessary idea? That might remain a mystery—but the report should also be received with skepticism, since as of yet, it’s unclear who is actually trying to make this series happen.

Seriously – to quote Jerry Seinfeld – “who are the ad wizards who came up with this one?”. And you know in this day and age when timing is everything, don’t release news of a show like this the day after one of the world’s most notorious sex abusers gets his ass handed to him! But really a lot of these creeps don’t deserve second chances. They know what they did.

Early Thursday afternoon, a Pennsylvania jury consisting of seven men and five women found Bill Cosby guilty of sexually assaulting Andrea Constand.

Minutes later, news cameras captured four women who were not Andrea Constand sobbing, leaning on a marble balcony, leaning on each other. Three of them—Caroline Heldman, Lili Bernard, and Victoria Valentino—were among Cosby’s 60-plus other accusers, finally seeing some form of justice befall a man society and time told them was untouchable.

The footage of Cosby’s victims crying with relief played as B-roll to almost every news story of the Cosby verdict. And as I watched the women embracing, over and over again, two thoughts occurred to me. First: I can’t imagine the bittersweet victory those women must feel. Second: Charlie Rose can go fuck himself.

Charlie Rose has been high on the “go fuck yourself” list for quite some time. Last fall, eight women accused the erstwhile newsman of exposing himself to them, making lewd calls, and groping. Back then, Rose’s public response oscillated between defensive and confused. He tried to explain his creepiness away by saying that he was under the impression that he was pursuing mutual feelings. From his 21-year-old assistant. (For just one day in my life, I’d love to live with the confidence of an unattractive male septuagenarian who is still convinced that 21-year-old women are interested in him romantically.) Like Cosby, Rose never seemed to grok the harm he caused.

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[font size="8"]Mike Pompeo
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This week’s This Fucking Guy is Mike Pompeo. If you don’t know who he is, well, you will definitely need to because he’s now FOURTH in line for the presidency. If you think the idea of Mike Pence as president is scary, well, wait until you meet Mike Pompeo. And we’re going to delve deep into this guy’s character. See, we can all mock Mike Pence’s pasty white boy wannabe Ned Flanders brand of Christianity because it’s almost cartoonish in nature. But add a dash of some hardcore end times apocalypse worship to the mix, and you’ve got Mike Pompeo!

WASHINGTON — The Senate easily confirmed Mike Pompeo on Thursday as the United States’ 70th secretary of state, elevating the current C.I.A. director and an outspoken foreign policy hawk to be the nation’s top diplomat.

In the end, the 57-to-42 tally lacked the drama of other nail-biting confirmation votes in the Trump era. This week, Senator Rand Paul of Kentucky, the nominee’s main Republican antagonist, bowed to pressure from President Trump to drop his objections. Ultimately, seven members of the Senate Democratic caucus — five of whom face re-election this year in states that Mr. Trump won in 2016 — joined a united Republican conference to support Mr. Pompeo’s confirmation.

Shortly after the vote at the Capitol, Mr. Pompeo went across the street to the Supreme Court, where he was sworn in by Justice Samuel A. Alito Jr. Mr. Pompeo then dashed to Joint Base Andrews, where a plane was waiting to fly him to Brussels for a meeting of NATO allies. Senior staff on the plane greeted him with applause.

Yes seriously – holy shit! So he’s now fourth in line from the presidency behind Orrin Hatch and Paul Ryan. This fucking guy! Let’s go over some of his qualifications, shall we?

Secretary of State-in-waiting Mike Pompeo never served in the Gulf War, even though media outlets and many of his colleagues have repeatedly said he did, and Pompeo has done nothing to dispute their claims.

Splinter News asked the CIA about Pompeo’s record, and the agency confirmed that while he was in the Army from 1986 to 1991, he never saw action in the Middle East.

A spokesperson said that Pompeo, who is currently director of the CIA, “was in the U.S. Army at the time of the Gulf War — serving until 1991. He was not deployed to that theater.” The war lasted less than seven months, between August 1990 and February 1991.

The discrepancy between Pompeo’s record and public accounts was first brought to light by Ned Price, a former CIA spokesman and special assistant to President Obama, who highlighted a series of inconsistencies on Twitter.

Splinter has a rundown of some prominent instances in which Pompeo’s war record has been cited incorrectly These include articles in The New Yorker and The Wall Street Journal, a letter signed by 51 Republicans expressing support for Pompeo’s secretary of State nomination, and a Marco Rubio speech on the Senate floor. Throughout all this, Pompeo has said nothing to correct the record. It’s possible, though seems unlikely, that he has simply missed all the references to his nonexistent war history. He has been busy, after all.

So he is fourth in line for the presidency and he lied about his time in the military. Oh who am I kidding? That makes him perfect for the Trump administration! Trump is a compulsive liar and he surrounds himself with other compulsive liars. But was he investigated by Mueller?

During his Secretary of State confirmation hearing Thursday morning, CIA Director Pompeo told senators that he has been interviewed by Special Counsel Bob Mueller, although he would not reveal the contents of those conversations. NBC News first reported on the interview back in January.

The backdrop: Pompeo reportedly took part in a White House a meeting last March during which President Trump asked whether he could intervene in the FBI's Russia investigation, per The Washington Post. During his hearing, Pompeo denied the suggestion that Trump asked him to do anything "improper" regarding the investigation.

Read more: https://www.axios.com/pompeo-interview-mueller-investigation-russia-fbi-c14f71fb-0da4-46ad-9985-e3cb4d62ce73.html

Well that raises another question – who in the Trump administration hasn’t been investigated by Muller yet? So why is Mike Pompeo such a big deal? Well despite that he has his lips firmly placed on Trump’s ass – and we all know how much his ass loves getting kissed – is that the Iran deal has been a big part of the news lately, and Mike might just be the guy to help Trump get his way.

WASHINGTON — Mike Pompeo, US President Donald Trump’s pick to become secretary of state, is an unabashed Iran hawk who vehemently opposed the 2015 nuclear deal, and has sought a more aggressive approach toward Tehran since joining the administration as CIA Director in January 2017.

Tillerson will now be succeeded by a figure who has stood out as an Iran hardliner. After former president Barack Obama forged the landmark agreement with world powers and Iran in July 2015, Pompeo, then a Congressman from Kansas, immediately castigated the pact as both ineffectual and weak.

He said the accord would not “stop Iran from getting a nuclear bomb” and that it “places Israel at more risk.” He scorned the notion, perpetuated by the Obama administration, that the deal would open Tehran up to the international economy and thus allow it to potentially join the community of nations. He said the “theory that post-sanctions Iran will moderate is a joke – they want to annihilate Israel.”

Well yeah it’s pretty obvious that no one wants to get annihilated. But Trump and his goons are helping to accelerate that process because they’re dominionists, and that’s what they believe in, because, that’s what Jesus would want! But this might be the icing on why this guy is so fucking dangerous. I mean what could possibly go wrong?

Washington — A one-letter mistake on an official White House statement led to consternation and questions about official U.S. policy toward Iran on Monday, and a quiet correction did little to quell the matter.

In the written statement sent to reporters around 7:30 p.m. ET, White House press secretary Sarah Sanders declared that newly unveiled Israeli intelligence proved "Iran has a robust, clandestine nuclear weapons program."

The declaration flew in the face of American intelligence determinations, which found Tehran froze its program following the Obama-era agreement to lift sanctions in exchange for curtailing its nuclear ambitions. By 9:30 p.m. ET, the statement appeared differently online.

"Iran had a robust, clandestine nuclear weapons program," the online version read, reiterating a long-established U.S. position.

Well there’s that. I mean even Putin is giving you the facepalm. That’s Mike Pompeo – this week’s:

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[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Cults Of Personality
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It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates:

Cults. They are generally a faux pas not talked about in normal society except when they surface in the news. The last time a cult made the news? 2001 – Heaven’s Gate, and before that 1992 – the Branch Davidians led by David Koresh. None of these however hold a candle to the NXIVM cult that was recently thrust into the spotlight by Smallville actress Allison Mack.
In late March, a man named Keith Raniere was arrested and charged with sex trafficking for his role NXIVM, a sex cult he founded in 1998. Since then, there’s been a flurry of reports about other alleged members, with the most recent being Allison Mack, who was arrested last week for allegedly recruiting women to be sex slaves.

Below, here’s everything you need to know about the most recent developments.

First things first: How do you say “NXIVM”?
It’s pronounced “Nexium.”

And what exactly is it?
It’s an Albany-based cult with connections all over the world, that reportedly masquerades as a “self-help” organization, meant to empower women. It was thrust into the spotlight in October 2017, when a New York Times investigation exposed that the women who were involved were referred to as “slaves,” and subject to ritual humiliations and brandings. They were also allegedly told to starve themselves to achieve Raniere’s standard of beauty and to have sex encounters with him.

Yes that is certainly true. And the allegations are definitely far more serious and damning than you would think possible. The NXIVM cult makes the previous cults we mentioned look almost cartoonish by comparison. It’s far worse than you would think. So how does a cult like this get sold?

A former Smallville actress has been arrested and charged with sex trafficking for her role in a secret society that news reports are calling a “sex cult.”

Allison Mack, who is perhaps best-known for her role as Chloe Sullivan on the WB (later CW) show Smallville, has been charged in a New York federal court with sex trafficking, sex trafficking conspiracy, and forced labor conspiracy. She’s accused of having recruited women — some of whom were underage — to the multilevel-marketing organization Nxivm (pronounced NEX-ium). She faces life in prison.

Ostensibly a self-help group advertising “executive success programs,” Nxivm has been condemned by former members as a cult, in which female members are ritualistically branded and pressured to engage in sexual “master-slave” relationships with higher-ups in the program, and in particular with the group’s founder and leader, Keith Raniere. Raniere, who is known to his followers as “Vanguard,” was arrested last month on charges of sex trafficking.

Raniere maintains his innocence, and the Nxivm website has posted a statement denying all allegations, saying, “We are currently working with the authorities to demonstrate his innocence and true character. We strongly believe the justice system will prevail in bringing the truth to light. We are saddened by the reports perpetuated by the media and their apparent disregard for ‘innocent until proven guilty,’ yet we will continue to honor the same principles on which our company was founded.”

So the cult got sold as a “female empowerment program” and a “self help” program. And just like most cults, they broke down the people who signed up for it and got tricked by their charismatic leader. Which is pretty common among all cults.

Pause your Wild Wild Country bingeing and look at the news, where so-called cult Nxivm has been making headlines for a week. Smallville actress Allison Mack was released on a $5 million bond on Tuesday after being indicted on sex-trafficking charges on Friday.

Since her arrest, stories have broken that Mack may have tried to recruit women including Emma Watson, Kelly Clarkson, and several feminist writers into a group that she referred to on Twitter as a “human development and women’s movement.” The group, however, was allegedly Nxivm, the upstate New York alleged sex cult run by a man named Keith Raniere, also known as “The Vanguard.”

Mack is denying the charges, and per Today, has issued a statement via a representative saying she has no comment at this time. Raniere was arrested in Mexico last month and has been charged with multiple accounts of sex trafficking and forced labor.

This cult however, will most likely need defensive attorneys because they most likely can’t afford the other kind. These are very serious crimes and Ms. Mack and Mr. Raniere are probably going to be going away for a very long time. We could go into this subject all day – but NXIVM had branches all over the country.

A branch of notorious “sex cult” Nxivm — which has been known to brand female “slaves” with its founder’s initials — is covertly recruiting within the arty Brooklyn crowd.

While the Albany-based sect had seemed to be imploding after its founder, Keith Raniere, was arrested in Mexico last month on sex-trafficking charges, it now appears to be searching for new blood. Last month, a number of notable Williamsburg artists and writers, who asked not to be named, were invited by friends to what was billed as a party promising “authentic conversation” among creatives and “light vegetarian fare.”

A flyer for the event at a private home in Williamsburg billed it as “an evening of meeting cool, like-minded artists and chatting about life, authenticity, and the awesome human potential,” also vaguely referring to an unexplained “human expression program.”

So they would recruit nearly the same way with the promise of a free “get acquainted” weekend. They even had their own school:

In 2015, Spanish-language pop icon Alejandro Sanz spoke to Mexican television stations and newspapers to promote his wife's new venture: a midtown Miami school called the Rainbow Cultural Garden that purported to train toddlers to speak as many as seven languages at once.

In response, sisters Loreta and Jimena Garza posted fawning praise of Sanz's interview on their Facebook pages. "Here we go RCG!!!!!!" Loreta Garza wrote July 7, 2015. "Thank You Keith Raniere for such an amazing opportunity."

Since then, Raniere has been outed as the leader of the alleged NXIVM sex cult, accused of using flaming-hot irons to brand women, and arrested by the FBI in Mexico on sex-trafficking charges. According to the Mexico City newspaper La Silla Rota, federal agents found Raniere hiding on a compound trying to live "off the grid" — alongside Loreta, Jimena, and another sister, Carola Garza.

So that is an insight into how one of the world’s most notoriouis sex cults was able to operate. This has been Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

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[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Gather around my fair brothers and sisters, it’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate. For the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it is our weekly duty to remind you that the holiest among us are also the most full of:

Food and religion. These are two things that often go hand in hand. But there has been one restaurant in particular in all of the these great United States of ours has been at the center of a very grave controversy. Now in our book, the good LAWRD does offer those who seek vengeance their just desserts, for revenge is a dish that is best served cold!

Memories Pizza, the Walkerton, Indiana restaurant that gained national attention for suggesting they would refuse to cater a gay wedding if invited to, has permanently closed. According to the South Bend Tribune, the restaurant shuttered last month.

The pizzeria went viral in 2015 after its owners became among the first to publicly voice support for Indiana’s controversial Religious Freedom Restoration Act, which then-governor Mike Pence signed into law to protect the “many people of faith [who] feel their religious liberty is under attack by government action.” (Due to a vocal backlash from civil rights groups, the act was amended a week later to explicitly offer anti-discrimination protections to the LGBTQ community.)

But in the days leading up to the original act’s signing, the pizzeria entered the spotlight then when Memories co-owner Crystal O’Connor told a local news station that “we would have to say no” to a gay couple if they requested pizzas for a wedding, a response fueled by the fact that they are “a Christian establishment.” O’Connor clarified at the time that the pizzeria would not deny service to any individual who wanted to place an order, but that they would not support or offer their services to a same-sex marriage celebration.

Seriously I would think our LGBT brothers and sisters would have to have better taste in food than to get pizza from a low rent pizza joint in the first place. Now just like Kentucky’s Sister Kim, Memories Pizza became an overnight celebrity with right wing Christian bigots.

Memories Pizza has put a sign out declaring the shop has permanently shut down last month, reports The South Bend Tribune. The Walkerton pizzeria was once at the center of a national controversy over LGBT discrimination.

In April 2015, owners Kevin and Crystal O’Connor told local media that they wouldn’t cater a gay wedding because of their religious beliefs. It was one of the first businesses to go on the record that it would refuse services related to same-sex weddings.

At that time, then-Governor Mike Pence had signed into law the Religious Freedom Restoration Act in the state, which many viewed as a "get out of jail free card" for business people who discriminated against LGBT patrons in the name of Christianity.

The video report of Memories Pizza went viral. Protests and death threats against the O'Connors led the store to close for eight days. Even a Concord High School coach was fired for commenting on Twitter, "Who's going to Walkerton with me to burn down Memories Pizza." But after Glenn Beck's The Blaze (which springboarded Tomi Lauren's career) started a GoFundMe account to support the restauranteurs, they received more than $800,000 in donations.

Kevin O’Connor has returned to the spotlight several times since the controversy. A year later he told The Tribune, "If your opinion isn’t what somebody else’s is, then I’m a dirtbag. Just because I don’t agree with you doesn’t mean I have to hate you.” He appeared on Fox News' You The Jury, pitted against a gay couple from Indianapolis.


Now even the good LAWRD sayeth that not only does he think it is ridiculous, but it is also good to forgive and forget, am I not right about that? Can I get an amen??? But our followers have done this and you shall not forgive if thine death threat is issued!

Memories Pizza, an Indiana pizzeria owned by a Christian family who in 2015 said they wouldn't carter a same-sex wedding if asked, has closed.

The South Bend Tribune reported on Monday that the pizzeria, which found itself in the midst of a national controversy due to its stance, has closed, with a sign at the front window explaining that it was shuttered last month.

The website for the pizzeria has also shut down and placed for sale on public domain.

Local business owners declined to speak publicly about the closing, but suggested that the pizzeria's owners, father Kevin and daughter Crystal O'Connor, were ready to retire.

The O'Connors said that they had received death threats in 2015 after they explained that they wouldn't cater same-sex weddings — because of their Christian belief that marriage is a holy union between a man and a woman — after a reporter asked them that question.

Yes!!! It is time to stop this foolishness!!!! For leaving a death threat is a sin!!!! It is one of the most egregious of sins ,and if you commit this sin, you will go to the place where the devil will immediately judge your fate, and we all don’t want that!!

A sign found at the front window of Memories Pizza stated that it permanently locked its doors in March. Owner Kevin O'Connor and his daughter Crystal have decided to close down and retire, according to reports.

The O'Connors were first featured in the national news in 2015 after saying that they would refuse catering to a gay couple's wedding. Their pronouncements came after Vice President Mike Pence, who was the state's governor at that time, signed Indiana's Religious Freedom Restoration Act (RFRA) that legally allowed establishments to refuse service if it went against their beliefs. The O'Connors told reporters that they would actually welcome anyone into their restaurant but that they would not cater to a gay wedding if asked.

"It is not right for a man to marry a man and for a woman to marry a woman," Kevin said in the interview. "People could end up marrying trees," he added.

Reporter Alyssa Marino, who talked to Indiana business owners regarding the RFRA, explained on Twitter: "I just walked into their shop and asked how they feel. They've never been asked to cater a same-sex wedding."

After the O'Connors' statements made headlines, Memories Pizza's Yelp page received a number of negative reviews. The restaurant owners also reportedly received death threats.

Yes!!!! Don’t call this pizza dude! For doing so is a sin, and I hope that is the take away that you get from today’s sermon. For now, mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Ford Motor Company
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So this weekend, the Ford Motor Company made one of the most astoundingly stupid decisions a company can make. And with this decision they may have just very well committed corporate suicide and that’s not going to be good for anybody. This is a “take the money and run” kind of decision that can come back to bite you in the ass. So here’s what happened.

In the news last week: "Say goodbye to the Ford sedan," (as reported, in this case, at the Washington Post).

Ford announced plans late Wednesday to eliminate some of the company’s most well-known cars in North America, including the Fiesta subcompact, Fusion midsize sedan, Taurus large sedan and the C-Max van, according to Ford’s quarterly earnings statement. The decision followed years of declining car sales.

Ford said eliminating most of the company’s cars except for two models will allow the company to focus on their “winning portfolio” in the United States, Canada and Mexico. The Detroit automaker plans to keep the Ford Mustang sports car and a new Focus crossover that the company plans to release next year.

This comes as the sales of new vehicles in the United States has shifted, once again, from cars to light trucks (that is, including minivans, crossovers, and SUVs as well as actual trucks); the trend started round about the time of the invention of the minivan in 1983 (remember when Lee Iacocca saved Chrysler?), slowed with the rise in gas prices, and picked up again in the past five years.

Really? This is winning? Are you guys drinking from the same Kool-Aid that Charlie Sheen and Kanye West are drinking from? Do you not realize the ripple effect this is going to have on the economy? Oh wait you don’t care because you’re rich. It’s not enough you have to make $25 billion, you have to make 3 or 4 times that. Because rich executives want all the money. I said all!

While Ford still sells a fair number of cars in the U.S., models like the Fiesta, Focus, and Fusion all lose money today. Many are delivered to rental car companies at bargain-basement prices. In the consumer market, Ford has to offer massive discounts to move cars off of its dealers' lots.

Crossovers are far more profitable, largely because consumers tend to see them as more desirable. Additionally, the difference in price between sedans and crossovers has narrowed in recent years. Indeed, in January, Ford began U.S. sales of the EcoSport: its first entry-level crossover for the domestic market. The starting price is just $19,995, though a typically equipped version would cost significantly more.

If consumer preferences are set to continue shifting toward crossovers, it makes sense for Ford to double down on that slice of the market.

Crosstown rival General Motors (NYSE: GM) is moving in a similar direction. It is working to broaden its crossover lineup with an ever-expanding array of models. And while GM doesn't plan to exit the U.S. car market entirely, it is likely to discontinue at least two models in the next few years: the Chevy Sonic and the Chevy Impala.

Yeah it’s about like that, only the Ford execs are the ones giving us the finger. So just how bad of a decision is this? Like I said before it could be corporate suicide for Ford. Hey Trump is this really how we MAGA?

Ford's new CEO, Jim Hackett, just announced a bold strategic move for America's most enduring automaker: abandoning the car business. Hackett completely reversed former CEO Alan Mulally's full-line strategy to focus on trucks and SUVs. A 3 percent jump in Ford's stock price validated Hackett's decision, but that adrenaline shot could be short-lived. Jettisoning automobiles may prove fatal for Ford, leaving the market to GM and foreign producers.

Bowing to short-term shareholder pressures that felled predecessor Mark Fields, Hackett is undoing 115 years of Ford's automobile legacy. Unlike General Motors CEO Mary Barra, labelled a "car gal" for her 38 years in the business, Hackett has no experience in automobiles. He comes from thirty years of making furniture and most recently as interim athletic director at the University of Michigan.

Yeah except for one problem – it probably won’t. And it will most likely backfire on them. Because think of all of what it takes to produce one car and then sell it, and all those people will most likely be out of a job. But hey, the executives will get nice big fat fucking paydays so it’s all good! Or not. Remember a couple of weeks ago when I played the funeral version of the Toys R Us song? Someone may need to do that for “have you driven a Ford lately?”.

Nearly 110 years after first unveiling the Ford Model T, one of America's most iconic vehicle manufacturers has announced plans to move away from U.S. small-car production and instead focus on the SUVs and trucks that have increasingly eaten into smaller vehicles' market share.

Ford executives last week announced a plan to reposition the company's business model, saying they expect "almost 90 percent of the Ford portfolio in North America will be trucks, utilities and commercial vehicles" by 2020. It represents a watershed moment for a company that more than a century ago produced one of the first commercially viable car models the world had ever seen.

The move is consistent with a domestic vehicle landscape that in recent years has tilted heavily in favor of trucks, SUVs and larger vehicles that many Americans shied away from a decade ago, when the economy was dragging and oil prices were considerably higher.

Total car sales in the U.S. – which do not include trucks and SUVs – clocked in at nearly 556,000 in March, down 9.2 percent over the year, according to industry statistics compiled by the Autodata Corporation. To date, sales are down 10.8 percent from their performance during the first three months of 2017.

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[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
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Let’s hit it!

Of course you know that by now people are people and people are dumb. So who is dumb this week? Why there are a lot of people out there, sir! First off, you know that old adage about yelling “fire” in a crowded theater. And you especially don’t do that in a sold out movie theater showing Avengers: Infinity War, one of the biggest blockbusters of all time. Well, there was a preacher out of Redlands, California, who did just that.

REDLANDS (CBSLA) — An outing to catch one of the season’s most anticipated films turned into a panic-filled afternoon for some moviegoers Friday.

Armed officers rushed to the Harkins Mountain Grove 16 theaters in Redlands, where people had just finished watching the latest installment of the “Avengers” franchise, fearing there might a gunman inside. Witnesses said when the movie was over, a man stood up and started yelling in what sounded like a preacher’s sermon.

“I think when he said, ‘If you were to die tonight, would your passage to heaven be guaranteed?’ — something along those lines — I think that’s when people started panicking,” Susie Arias told CBS2 News.

Arias said she and her partner were able to walk out, but they said people behind them started running and pushing in an effort to exit quickly.


It was kind of like that. Well to give the guy credit, at least he got his message out! Next up this is a perfect example of life imitating art. Remember that Breaking Bad episode where a Los Pollos Hermanos truck got hijacked ? Well this isn’t anything that crazy, but we’re not surprised.

On Thursday, Centralia police said 126 pounds of methamphetamine were found in a truck hauling Starbucks products between California and Spokane.

The truck was stopped and police say suspicious activity led to the request of help from a narcotics K-9.

The truck’s interior was searched, and police said they found 40 bundles of meth in a television box on the top bunk of the sleeper berth.

Under a mattress, police said they found another 50 bundles of meth, 2.4 pounds of suspected heroin, several thousand Oxycodone pills and a few grams of cocaine.

Next up – Legos! And if you’re being investigated by police for selling stolen goods, maybe you don’t sell stolen goods to undercover police. Get how that works? Well, this guy in Portland certainly didn’t.

Police said that investigators posed as thieves offering Azar stolen goods at far below the retail price. Authorities said Azar requested to purchase $13,000 of stolen goods from the undercover investigators.

He was arrested on April 26 after authorities say he purchased supposedly 'stolen' items from undercover officers.

When they searched his southeast Portland home, police said they found “a large quantity of stolen Legos [sic]”. The Lego and other toys that had been taken from Fred Meyer stores alone was worth $50,000, according to police.

That estimate did not include recovered merchandise that originated from other retail outlets, police said.

Authorities believe Azar would solicit stolen items through websites like Craigslist and OfferUp, purchasing them from thieves for low prices, before selling them on Craigslist, eBay and OfferUp for a profit. Those stealing the items to sell to Azar were often drug addicts, police added.

Ha ha, Lego Batman was a great movie. Next up in People Are Dumb – Youtube! Yes, Youtube has brought out a ton of crazy people. And what happens when a guy comes in and pretends to be the CEO of a legendary burger chain? Well this is beyond stupid.

(Newser) – In-N-Out Burger isn't laughing about a YouTube prankster who claimed to be the company's CEO making a surprise visit. The burger chain has gone to court to seek a restraining order against prankster Cody Roeder, whose videos appeared on his popular "Trollmunchies" YouTube channel, the OC Register reports. In two now-deleted videos filmed earlier this month, Roeder visits Southern California In-N-Out burger locations dressed in business attire, claiming to be the acting CEO and demanding free food for a "taste test." He claims to be the ex-husband of Lynsi Snyder-Ellingson, the granddaughter of chain founder Harry Snyder.

According to court papers, at one location, Roeder berated employees for "contamination" of the food and grabbed a burger from a customer believed to have been his assistant. Roeder "proceeded to throw the burger on the ground in the middle of the restaurant and step on it, telling the customer it was 'garbage,'" the legal filing states. In a statement, the chain said it has seen "an increase of visitors to our stores, who are not customers but instead are intentionally disruptive and who then try to promote themselves through social media." The legal action seeks a restraining order banning Roeder and his accomplices from the chain's restaurants, as well as damages of more than $25,000.


Man why did you have to waste the cheeseburger? Dude should be arrested. I mean what did the cheeseburger ever do to you? Next up – you know it’s been a while since we heard from our good friend Florida Man but not a week goes by where he’s not up to his usual tricks! In a scene straight out of the movie Super Troopers, there’s this!

A Florida man was arrested after he tried to dump narcotics out of his car window in Martin County, authorities said.

Tyko Dean, 41, of Oakland Park was pulled over on I-95, according to the Martin County Sheriff’s Office. Deputies said Dean pulled his car over initially, but fled when he was asked to leave the vehicle.

With the help of air and K-9 units, Dean’s car was forced to stop. Deputies said Dean tried to toss illegal narcotics out of his car window.

However, detectives said they recovered 359 grams of cocaine and 31 grams of heroin from Dean’s car.

Finally for People Are Dumb this week – campaign ads! Yes, even our elected officials or people running to be elected officials aren’t immune from stupidity. You know in this day and age when people are actually fighting against the gun lobby and the NRA, maybe you don’t lead with an ad that praises a “healthy admiration for the 2nd amendment”. Let’s show the ad first.

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Something tells me I wouldn’t want to date this guys’ daughters – he seems like the “Dads Against Daughters Dating” type. Remember those assholes?

Political candidates have long appeared with guns in campaign ads — holding guns, firing guns, and even assembling guns blindfolded. Earlier this month, Georgia gubernatorial candidate Hunter Hill aired an ad showing him loading an assault rifle. The video title? “Liberals won’t like this.”

Now, a new ad in the race for Georgia governor — in which a candidate points a gun at a teenager — did not sit well with some Georgians. After all, it aired just one state away from the Florida high school where 17 people were killed in a mass shooting

In the campaign ad, Brian Kemp, Georgia’s secretary of state, sits in a room surrounded by firearms — handguns on a table to his right, rifles on the table in front of him, and what appear to be two AR-15-style guns leaning on the wall behind him. Across his lap he holds a double-barrel shotgun, cleaning it off as he speaks into the camera. Next to him sits a young man in khakis and a tucked-in flannel shirt.

“I’m Brian Kemp, this is Jake, a young man interested in one of my daughters,” he says, motioning to the teenager next to him. “Yes, sir,” Jake responds, looking nervous as he fidgets with his fingers.

Read more: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-mix/wp/2018/05/02/georgia-governor-candidate-aims-gun-at-teenager-in-campaign-ad-get-over-it-he-tells-critics/?utm_term=.8ccf38490ec9

That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Stupidest State Contest: Round 2 Week 3
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16 states will enter, but only one will be crowned the new Top 10 Conservative Idiots Stupidest State!

Welcome back! I hope you all filled out your brackets! We are deep into Round 2. Not quite that deep, sir. Man, the audience has been bringing it this week! Last week – it was an absolutely shocking end to the Family Values championship as the long time reigning kings of the conference – Alabama – got sent home this year after a buzzer beater from Missouri sent the champs home packing. This week we’re live at the home of the Portland Trailblazers – Moda Center – for the Batshit Conference championships – Kentucky. Virginia. Both young teams looking to tangle for the conference title. But Virginia had one of the best records of the entire league during the regular season, but Kentucky continues to stack its’ team with lots and lots of crazy talent. Who will out crazy them all? Let’s find out!

[font size="6"]Batshit Conference Championship: Kentucky Vs Virginia [/font]

[font size="4"]Kentucky[/font]

My old Kentucky home!!!!!!!!!!! Yes, we are back in the Bluegrass State everybody! Yes, the state that was literally the first state to call for @realDonaldTrump as our new president probably knew what they were doing. I mean they also gave us Mitch McConnell, Rand Paul, Ron Paul – who may crawl out from his troll cave in Russia soon, Kim Davis, and Matt Bevin, has shown us no signs of slowing down when it comes to producing the freshest batshit in the country. Yes, this state can outrival Florida in the sheer number of crazy things that happen – and that’s saying a lot! So what has the Bluegrass state been up to lately? Well they’re so crazy that even their own is starting to channel his inner Bart Simpson.

Matt Bevin has been governor of Kentucky for three legislative sessions and the best he can come up with is: It’s not my fault.

From the beginning of his administration, Bevin has used politicians, judges, teachers, the media and any other constituency or individual he can find as political pinatas — someone else is always to blame.

Don’t like the budget? It’s the legislature’s fault.

Frustrated by the process? Blame former House Speaker Jeff Hoover’s sordid, sex scandal, which, he claims, ruined our plans for a special session.

That pension crisis? Inherited that problem from years of irresponsible, incompetent politicians.

Read more: https://www.leoweekly.com/2018/04/matt-never-blame-bevin/

Yes while Bart Simpson is the original prankster, Matt can’t out crazy Bart Simpson. I mean come on, Bart went to rehab for pranking people! And that’s saying something. And if you think that’s crazy, wait until you see what he said about the teacher protests!

Kentucky Gov. Matt Bevin (R) suggested Friday that children were physically harmed because they were at home during the statewide teacher strikes, when teachers gathered at the capitol to protest school funding.

“I guarantee you somewhere in Kentucky today a child was sexually assaulted that was left at home because there was nobody there to watch them," said Bevin, who sought to shut down bills aimed at expanding the state education budget. "I guarantee you somewhere today, a child was physically harmed or ingested poison because they were home alone because a single parent didn't have enough money to take care of them."

Bevin reportedly complained of the teachers sprawled across the capitol grounds, telling reporters he saw them smoking and "leaving trash around."

Because of the protests, "hundreds of thousands of children" were likely left at home without childcare, he said.


Quick! To the Pedomobile!

That joke never gets old. You know what is it with Christian conservatives where their mind just immediately goes to the most fucked up sexual perversions they can think of? What are they trying to tell us? I could just go all day on how fucking crazy Matt Bevin is. We may have to do a deep dive on him for “People Who Somehow Got Elected” at some point because he’s fucking crazy.

FRANKFORT, Ky. -- In a rare public rebuke, Kentucky's top House leader on Wednesday chastised fellow Republican Gov. Matt Bevin for criticizing teachers who have mobilized to oppose a plan to revamp one of the nation's worst-funded public pension plans.

Acting House Speaker David Osborne told reporters that the governor's remarks were "inappropriate" and "show a lack of understanding of the people who are impacting the lives of young people in our state."

In an interview on WVLC radio, Bevin said Tuesday that teachers opposing the pension changes were "ignorant" and were "throwing a temper tantrum." He said if protesting teachers get what they wish, there won't be a pension system for the next generation. He called that "remarkably selfish and shortsighted." He also said teachers protesting the pension bill would be like people during World War II protesting rationing of food and steel to help the troops.

"It's about just straight up wanting more than your fair share," Bevin said.

Osborne said Wednesday that the governor deserves credit for seeking greatly increased state funding to support the pension plans. But he said Bevin's comments about teachers on Tuesday and in recent months have made it much more difficult for lawmakers to pass a pension bill.

Read more here: http://www.thenewstribune.com/news/business/article205182419.html

Yeah going mad without power is boring, no one listens to you! Like I said I could go on all day about how crazy Matt Bevin is, and we could just focus on him here for the Batshit conference championship, but I don’t have that kind of time! Matt is so crazy that his own house is rebelling against him! But I will leave you with this.

As always, Bevin has the back of the NRA, saying it’s not guns. Saying that it's about the violence in movies, on television, in video games and music.

He did it on Leland Conway’s show on WHAS radio and he did it in a video he posted Thursday night on his Facebook page.

The problem is, there is absolutely nothing to back the claim that video games and music and movies and television have anything at all to do with increased gun violence.

The American Psychological Association and the American Academy of Pediatrics warn against allowing children to play video games but stop short of saying the games cause violent behavior.

[font size="4"]Virginia [/font]

So Virginia is a relative newcomer to the tournament. And while we already covered all of the things that Virginia is the home of – let’s get some facts straight. The Commonwealth state is right next to our nation’s capital – Washington, DC. It also is home to the world’s largest cemetery – Arlington National Cemetery. But Virginia is also the home to some of the most hardcore racism in the entire country. After all, it’s the state that helped give birth to the Confederacy. But it’s good to know that our nation’s current crop of white supremacists can rival just about anything produced in the 1850s!

Christopher Charles Cantwell, a self-described white nationalist and alt-right activist from New Hampshire, was arrested on March 31 in Leesburg for public swearing and intoxication, according to the Leesburg Police Department.

Leesburg Police Officers observed Cantwell trying to cross the street in the 500 block of Market Street. When they made contact with him, “he did show signs of drunkenness. He smelled of alcohol, couldn’t keep his balance,” Sam Shenouda of Leesburg Police told the Times-Mirror.

“At that point, we’re responsible for the person’s safety so he was taken into custody and held until sober,” said Shenouba.

Cantwell was later released on his own recognizance. Shenouda told the Times-Mirror there was no further investigation as to what he was doing in Leesburg. He also said that Cantwell was not investigated in relation to KKK literature that has been distributed throughout Loudoun County over the past year.

Read more: https://www.loudountimes.com/news/white-nationalist-chris-cantwell-known-for-role-in-charlottesville-riots/article_44905e3a-473e-11e8-8cb8-437f3a7f4973.html

So Virginia is the home of Charlottesville. And the University Of Virginia And what’s in Charlottesville? Well it was home to the absolute shit show that was the Charlottesville riots last year that were started by Alt Right assholes. Well the good news is that UVA has its’ head on a bit more straight than the rest of Virginia does!

Unite the Right rally organizer Jason Kessler is no longer allowed to set foot on University of Virginia property.

He will still be able to go to the UVA Medical Center, as well as attend paid events on university property.

The university announced Friday, April 27, that it is in the process of serving Kessler, a UVA alum, a no trespass warning. The university made its decision after hearing multiple reports that he threatened students in person, targeted them through cyber-bullying and cyber-harassment, and targeted them based on protected characteristics.

The university also believes Kessler intentionally and purposefully misled the UVA Police Department regarding the torch-lit rally on August 11, 2017, held by members of the 'alt-right' and white nationalists. Kessler had helped to organize that event, as well.

So Virginia’s got a massive white supremacist problem. And they’re not giving up their beliefs any time soon. Yeah we just hope that this racist shit is only a fad, right? At least I want to hope that it is! I mean come on Virginia is home to a guy who calls himself “The Crying Nazi”! Worst WWII movie ever, BTW.

Bond conditions have changed for Christopher Charles Cantwell, the man charged in connection to a torch-lit white nationalist rally at the University of Virginia last summer.

Cantwell has been out on a $25,000 bond after being charged in Albemarle County with illegal use of tear gas. He is accused of spraying tear gas during a white nationalist rally at UVA on August 11, 2017, one day before the Unite the Right rally.

An Albemarle Circuit Court judge ruled Thursday that the 37-year-old New Hampshire man will be held behind bars until he gets an alcohol bracelet.

The ruling comes after Cantwell was charged for public swearing and intoxication in Loudon County on March 31. At the time he was released on his own recognizance.

The judge said Thursday that she is not concerned the defendant will not show up to court, but believes Cantwell could pose a public danger when drinking.

Virginia is also the home of uber right wing fundamentalist Christian college Liberty University. And their president is hardcore Trump supporter Jerry Falwell Jr. We’ve profiled him many times on the Top 10 but he’s gone off the rails lately in his admiration of Trump. They love Trump. I can’t quite put my finger on it.

When evangelical leader and author Shane Claiborne wrote Liberty University President Jerry Falwell Jr. to request that they meet and pray together this weekend, Liberty responded with a written threat that Claiborne will be arrested if he steps foot on any property owned by Liberty or by Thomas Road Baptist Church. Claiborne has been publicly challenging Falwell to debate whether Jesus would support President Trump.

Claiborne is the leader of The Simple Way in Philadelphia and co-director of Red Letter Christians, a group that “mobilizes individuals into a movement of believers who live out Jesus’ counter-cultural teachings,” including opposition to materialism and capital punishment. “It’s time for a Christianity that looks like Jesus again,” the group says. Claiborne’s co-director, evangelist Tony Campolo, told Baptist News this week, “As evangelicalism moves more and more to the right, it’s safe to say evangelicalism looks more and more like the Tea Party,” something he called “dangerous.”

Claiborne will be in Lynchburg this weekend for the “Red Letter Revival” that his group is holding and he asked Falwell for permission to hold a prayer vigil on campus with Liberty students and alumni. His email invited Falwell to attend the revival and said the campus prayer vigil was planned for Saturday afternoon.

Claiborne shared his letter and the response from Liberty University’s police department on his Facebook page Thursday night. The letter warns that under Virginia law, trespassing is a misdemeanor “punishable by confinement in jail for not more than twelve months or a fine of not more than $2,500, or both.”

[font size="4"]And the winner is… [/font]

Oh god this wasn’t even a game. Kentucky came out of the gate strong and absolutely annihilated Virginia. Sorry Virginia, you can’t out crazy Kentucky, no matter how many tiki torches you sell. Final score: 86 – 61. Kentucky routes Virginia by a final score of 25. They have stunned Virginia and they will move on to the Final Four. Virginia will go home. Cut the net guys, you earned it!

Oh and can we get some “My Old Kentucky Home”?

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

It’s the last single round elimination before we head into the Final Four. Next week we’re live from the beautiful new home of the Sacramento Kings, Golden 1 Center in Sacramento, for the Fiscal Irresponsibility Conference championship. Wisconsin vs West Virginia. The winner will face Kentucky, the loser will go home!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Rancid[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen my next guests are a legendary punk band from Northern California. Their latest album is called “Trouble Maker” and you can see them at the Montebello Rock Fest in Montebello, Quebec on June 15th. Playing their song “Ghost Of A Chance”, give it up for Rancid!

See you next week!


Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: City National Grove Of Anaheim, Anaheim, CA
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Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

April 25, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-15: We Are Both Dragon Energy Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-15: We Are Both Dragon Energy Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! 15 minutes with us can save an average of 15% or more on your car insurance! Can we talk about the city of Philadelphia for a minute? Sure they’re still celebrating that glorious Super Bowl victory in which they kicked Tom Brady’s ass. And when they celebrate, they celebrate big. But when they lose, they also lose in grand fashion. And if I say if you know you’re going to lose, why not lose big? And that’s exactly what Philadelphia did when their NHL team, the Flyers, did when they got swept by the Pittsburgh Penguins - again. Look, I get it – losing sucks and especially when you lose to the same team all the time. I’m an Angels fan, we lose to the Red Sox and Yankees all the fucking time. I’m also a Ducks fan – we just came off the worst playoff showing in probably team history. But you know what we don’t do? We don’t throw trash on the ice or the field after we lose. You know what else we don’t do? Use the opposing team’s faces in our city’s urinals. So that happened. Both of these things actually happened – you can look them up on Google. Yeah can we show that picture? Seriously guys! I mean this isn’t a Blues Brothers concert – don’t throw your beer cups and other trash on the stage. Take it out the way a regular team does – fire the coach during the off season! Yeah that will show him not to lose a championship again! Of course that doesn’t mean that they won’t hire a new guy who’s the same or worse. But really Philly, you guys need to grow the fuck up when you lose and take it like the rest of us! Yeah you got spoiled a bit there with the Eagles and with Villanova. But you want all the championships, apparently. I said ALL!!! OK enough of the intro – we got a lot of idiocy to get to this week. But first John Oliver is back and he discusses Iran Deal done with a State Department under Trump:

Holy shit was there a lot of racism this week! And things are going to get real dark real fast. That said in the first slot this week we’re going to bring back “How Is This Still A Thing” and this week we’re going to ask: Neo Nazism, how is this still a thing? Taking the #2 slot this week is Sean Hannity. Yes, the reigning king of the deplorables has had his worst week ever after being outed as Michael Cohen’s mysterious third client. In the number 3 slot is our old buddy Alex Jones. People have finally had enough of his false flag bullshit, he’s getting called out on it, and it’s spectacular. Taking the #4 seed is the guy who we call president, Donald J Trump, and we’ll tell you about how he combined his two favorite hobbies during the Barbara Bush funeral, in the tacky fashion you would expect from him. At number 5 is an all new edition of Top 10 Investigates (5) and this week we’re going deep inside a racist frat at Syracuse University but it turns out they’re not the only ones! At number 6 this week is of course our weekly sermon on all things holy, Holy Shit (6) and this week our resident pastor is going to call out his fellow religious nuts in their support of our unholy president. At number 7 is the Alt Right (7) who has strangely embraced Kanye West after he returned to Twitter this week after a long absence, and is well just Kanye being Kanye. At number 8 we’re going to talk about Focus On The Family. Yes, the James Dobson institution got called out by our good friends at Right Wing Watch for tax fraud, and well, the resulting feud is insane. In the number 9 (NEIN!!!!) slot this week we’ve got a new installment of People Are Dumb, because, well, people are dumb. Finally this week we’re live at the home of the Golden State Warriors, Oracle Arena, for Round 2 Week 2 of the Stupidest State contest! And this time it’s the Family Values championship – Alabama vs Missouri – will Missouri’s Cinderella story continue, or will Alabama move on to face their neighbors in the Flyover League championship? Plus continuing our punk month celebration we’ve got some live music for you from a little band I like to call “The Offspring”! Yay!!! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]Neo Nazism: How Is This Still A Thing?
[br] [/font]

Time once again to ask:

This week: Neo Nazism. How is this still a thing? And not only is it a thing, it seems to be gaining in popularity thanks to the guy in the Kremlin. So this week there was a lot of racism in the news – and none of it is good. In fact, it’s the opposite of good. And not only do we want to know how this is still a thing, we also want to know how the Nazi party is still a thing. Yes, you heard that correctly – the Nazi party is still a thing.

Neo-Nazis held a swastika burning following a white supremacist rally in the city of Newnan, Georgia, on Saturday.

Photographer Spencer Platt captured the scene for Getty Images. His pictures show a massing burning swastika and an othala rune – a pagan symbol that was used by some elements of the Third Reich.

One image shows dozens of people giving Nazi salutes in front of a burning swastika that appears to be 12 to 18 feet tall.

According to Platt and local news reports, the white supremacist group gathered in Draketown, Georgia, about 50 miles from Newnan after the protest.

So yes we have actual Nazis marching on American soil now. Have they learned nothing from history? Apparently not. We fought an entire war to keep Nazis out of America. Now they're socially acceptable. In fact they have learned less than nothing. In fact – the state of Georgia actually has laws on the books that protect Nazi protesting.

The neo-Nazis were running late, so the counterprotesters began without them, lining the streets of Newnan, Ga., on Saturday afternoon.

The target of their counterprotest was the National Socialist Movement, the neo-Nazis who had planned a public rally. But things quickly went awry for the counterprotesters who were wearing masks or bandannas that concealed their faces — a problem in the eyes of some police officers. About 2:30 p.m., police began to point their guns at a crowd of the anti-racism protesters gathered on a sidewalk.

“State law requires you to remove your masks right now,” one SWAT officer told the crowd, according to video footage from the scene. “You will do it right now or you will be arrested.”

Within minutes, several counterprotesters were in handcuffs. Video footage from the scene showed SWAT officers pulling some counterprotesters off the curb and throwing them to the ground. One man wearing a bandanna over his face was arrested as counterprotesters chanted, “Hands up, don’t shoot!” The officers continued to yell, “Remove your masks!”

So let’s get this straight – counter protesters wearing masks – not OK. But neo Nazis marching on American soil? It’s “protected speech”! But at the neo Nazi rally, there were apparently more protestors than counter protesters.

A neo-Nazi rally outside of Atlanta on Saturday drew only a few participants and did not last very long.

But the event still upended Newnan, Georgia, a city of about 38,000, for the afternoon as downtown shops closed and counterprotesters gathered. Hasco Craver, the assistant city manager, said more than 700 law enforcement officers from 42 agencies were present.

Members of the National Socialist Movement, a white nationalist organization that has been labeled a hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center, gained a permit last month for a rally from 3 to 5 p.m. at a park. Organizers estimated the rally could draw 50 to 100 people, city officials said.

Their plans called to mind a rally of white nationalists in Charlottesville, Virginia, in August that spun out of control, with demonstrators and counterprotesters clashing in the streets. An Ohio man, described by police as a Nazi sympathizer, drove his car through a crowd of pedestrians, killing one woman and injuring at least 19 others.

Yes, ha ha indeed. But in fact, white supremacy has become meta, and what seems like a Chappelle’s Show sketch come to life, there really is a black white supremacist out there!

Bryan Sharpe, who uses the moniker “Hotep Jesus” online, has acquired overnight support from right-wing media, but on the author page linked to his Twitter account, Sharpe, who is black, has aligned himself with the racist alt-right movement, expressed anti-Semitic beliefs and argued that “black culture is sure to create nothing but failure.”

On Sunday, Sharpe entered a Starbucks coffee shop to demand a free drink in response to outrage after two men were arrested at a Starbucks in Philadelphia after a manager called the police. The men were reportedly waiting for a business associate to arrive, did not order drinks, and had refused to leave when asked. In response, Starbuck announced it would close 8,000 stores in the United States for a day for racial-bias training.

Since Sharpe posted the video, it has been shared by conservative media sites like Drudge Report, Infowars, Independent Journal Review, TheBlaze, talk radio host Rush Limbaugh, WorldNetDaily, and Milo Yiannopoulous’ site Dangerous. Conservative commentators boosted the video because they believe it proved, as right-wing writer Ian Miles Cheong states, “the foolishness of Starbucks’ virtue signaling and white guilt.”

Yes that is real. That is a thing. Oh and the guy who leads a real life Alt Right fight club, the Proud Boys, has a message for those that dare stand in his path. You know – like a James Bond villain who is on the radio.

Gavin McInnes, the CRTV host who heads up a freakish boy’s club recently identified as a hate group, told viewers that he blamed women “voting with their hearts” for “illegals and Muslims” that murder people in the United States.

Last night on his show, McInnes claimed that conservatives “need to protect the left from themselves” because liberals are “so bad at anything but the patriarchy.” McInnes tried to make his case by turning to a story recently shared by University of Denver law professor Nancy Leong about a predatory Uber driver who told her he was going to take her to a hotel against her will—but not before McInnes noted that he thought Leong was “insanely hot” and rated her attractiveness.

McInnes presumed that the Uber driver who endangered Leong was an immigrant. He then used that assumption to put the blame for Leong’s experience on women who vote in favor of immigrant rights.

“Immigrants, mass immigration, that’s women voting, voting with their hearts, feelings—‘They just want a place to stay. They just want a place to crash.’—so they bring in illegals and Muslims and these Uber drivers end up killing people in New York and they tried to kill her,” McInnes said.

Except it isn’t. But there is some good news out there, is that Neo Nazis like Milo Yiannopolous are getting shut down wherever they go. What a time to be alive!

Conservative writer and provocateur Milo Yiannopoulos was forced to leave a bar in New York City Saturday after a crowd chanted “Nazi scum get out.”

Videos show the crowd repeatedly chanting the phrase while the former Breitbart News editor is seen standing in the corner of the bar. He left the bar soon afterward.

The videos identify the chanting group as members of the Democratic Socialists of America.

There you have it. One group of socialists heckling another group of socialists. That’s enough to make you ask – neo Nazism:

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[font size="8"]Sean Hannity
[br] [/font]

So the king of the deplorables, Sean Hannity, may have had his worst week ever. Last week it was revealed that Trump’s lawyer – Michael Cohen – was a very high paid lawyer with a very limited clientele. And it was then revealed that Michael Cohen’s mysterious third client was revealed to be Trump’s personal megaphone, Sean Hannity. Yes, it’s all come full circle now! We know that Fox News talks directly to Trump because they know he watches 24 hours a day. So what was he up to?

Fox News anchor Sean Hannity had a bad week.

Last Monday, a lawyer representing Donald Trump’s personal attorney, Michael Cohen, said that Hannity was one of Cohen’s three clients. Cohen is under investigation in relation to a payment he reportedly made to adult film star Stormy Daniels on behalf of then-candidate Trump. Hannity denied (kind of) that he’d retained Cohen’s services, but that hasn’t stopped people from taking a closer look at his financial dealings, which have proven to be more extensive and complicated than previously known. Here’s what we know so far.

1. He is linked to at least 20 shell companies

According to documents reviewed by The Guardian, Hannity bought real estate through more than 20 shell companies registered in Georgia. A shell company is a vehicle used to hold assets and can help beneficiaries remain anonymous. They are not in themselves illegal, though they are sometimes used to conduct illegal activities such as tax evasion. There is no indication that Hannity is engaged in any illegal practices, but he is the hidden owner behind at least some of the 20 companies through which he has bought property. In his case, it appears the shell companies were used to limit his liabilities in the real estate deals in question. In the last 10 years, the companies have spent $90 million on 870 homes in seven U.S. states.

Damn straight! So come on, Hannity, what are you hiding with those foreclosed homes? Come on, all cards are on the table! Show us your poker face, damn it!

Following a report that contends he bought property with government assistance and then failed to disclose it, conservative commentator Sean Hannity on Monday said it was merely the "latest fake news attack."

"It is ironic that I am being attacked for investing my personal money in communities that badly need such investment and in which, I am sure, those attacking me have not invested their money," Hannity said in a statement. "The fact is, there are investments that I do not individually select, control or know the details about; except that obviously I believe in putting my money to work in communities that otherwise struggle to receive such support."

After the Fox News host last week was named as a client of Trump's personal lawyer, Michael Cohen, the Guardian on Sunday reported that records link Hannity to a group of more than 20 shell companies. Those companies, registered in Georgia, spent at least $90 million on more than 870 homes in the past 10 years.

The most controversial of those purchases: Hannity reportedly bought two large apartment complexes in Georgia, and the purchases were funded with mortgages obtained with help from the Department of Housing and Urban Development.

Of course he’s going to deny it! Just go be a nice little conservative there and deny you did that thing you did when there’s evidence that proves you did it. Because that’s what conservatives do! It’s fake news, folks! Fake news!!! OK Hannity we’re calling it. All cards laid out on the table! What hand have you got?

Fox News host Sean Hannity is linked to a group of shell companies that have spent $90 million buying hundreds of homes across the U.S through the help of foreclosures and the Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD), The Guardian reported Sunday.

More than 870 homes in seven different states have been purchased over the past decade, ranging from large mansions to rentals for low-income families, according to the newspaper.

For some of the mortgages, Hannity reportedly obtained funding from HUD under the National Housing Act loan program, which was first guaranteed under the Obama administration.

HUD recently increased Hannity’s original $17.9 million mortgage for purchases in Georgia by an additional $5 million, records obtained by the Guardian show.

Hannity did not disclose his cooperation with the department when he had HUD Secretary Ben Carson on his show last June, The Guardian noted.

Yeah that sounds about right! So what are you hiding Hannity? That you used the government assistance you railed against every night on Fox News? Or that he swindled people out of their money under shady circumstances? Or how about all of the above?

When Sean Hannity was named in court this week as a client of Donald Trump’s embattled legal fixer Michael Cohen, the Fox News host insisted their discussions had been limited to the subject of buying property.

“I’ve said many times on my radio show: I hate the stock market, I prefer real estate. Michael knows real estate,” Hannity said on television, a few hours after the dramatic hearing in Manhattan, where Cohen is under criminal investigation.

Hannity’s chosen investment strategy is confirmed by thousands of pages of public records reviewed by the Guardian, which detail a real estate portfolio of remarkable scale that has not previously been reported.

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[font size="8"]Alex Jones
[br] [/font]

You know if Sean Hannity is the king of the deplorables, then that must make Alex Jones the proverbial court jester. They keep him around because his insane ramblings make them seem slightly less crazy. The key word there is “slightly”. But Alex might have had his worst month ever. It turns out that he might not be exactly what one would call “truthful” – and I know that’s shocking! So the parents of the children who were murdered during the horrible Sandy Hook massacre have finally had enough of his calling every shooting a “false flag” bullshit.

Three parents whose children were killed at Sandy Hook Elementary School in 2012 filed a defamation lawsuit on Tuesday against Alex Jones, the right-wing conspiracy theorist who has long claimed the shooting was "completely fake" and a "giant hoax" perpetrated by opponents of the Second Amendment.

Mr. Jones, the popular radio show host who also operates the conspiracy theory website Infowars, has questioned for years whether 20 children and six adults died in the school massacre in Newtown, Conn. To bolster his false claims, he often cites news reports and video clips from the hours after the shooting that turned out to be incomplete or based on wrong information.

Soon after they buried their children, many Sandy Hook parents started to come under fierce attack by conspiracy theorists who have said they are actors in an elaborate scheme to enact stricter gun control laws. The fringe theories still thrive in small forums online but have reached a far greater audience through Mr. Jones, the most vocal propagator.

So the tables are finally turning on Alex Jones’ conspiracy theory and supplement hawking empire – and it’s not playing out like that TV show Empire either. Mmmmmm hmmmmmm!!!! But leave it to old Alex to play the victim here!

Alex Jones has claimed he himself is being defamed following lawsuits brought on by the parents of children killed in the Sandy Hook school shooting.

The InfoWars host is being sued for defamation by Neil Heslin, the father of 6-year-old victim Jesse Heslin, and Leonard Pozner and Veronique De La Rosa, who lost their six-year-old son Noah, for $1 million each over his conspiracy theories and “vicious lies” surrounding the 2012 massacre in Newtown, Connecticut.

Responding to the lawsuits on his show, the controversial broadcaster denied that he ever believed the shooting was faked and 20 children were not killed there.

“You’re allowed to question things in America, that’s not defamation,” Jones said. “But what is defamation is to file lawsuits that say I said things I didn’t say and then put me and my whole family through the ringer and lie about us and hold us up against dead children and say basically ‘we hate their families, we hate the children.' It’s almost like I’ve murdered the children and that’s not what happened.”


Oh come on, even Putin is giving you the facepalm. I mean come on, Alex, don’t play dumb here – you spent years slandering the victims of this horrifying massacre and you sent your idiot followers on a quest to out pedophiles at a DC pizza parlor because reasons. And of course like a good conservative, Alex is rolling back his previous statements.

Talk show host Alex Jones has responded to a lawsuit from the parents of two children killed in the 2012 Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting in Newtown, Conn. Jones has repeatedly claimed on his website, Infowars, that the shooting was staged.

In a YouTube video, Jones said he now believes the shooting really happened, and that the families are being used by the Democratic Party and the news media. Jones invited the parents onto his program for a discussion about guns.

In the past, Jones has repeatedly claimed the shooting was staged and that parents of children who died in the shooting are actors.

The plaintiffs are the parents of Jesse Heslin and Noah Pozner, who were among the 20 students and six educators at Sandy Hook Elementary School who died in the shooting. They’re seeking at least $1 million from Jones. The lawsuit alleges Jones’s misinformation led conspiracy theorists to make death threats against the families of shooting victims.

But it’s good to know that Alex hasn’t learned anything from this lesson. I mean after all when you’re dealing with a guy who has no morals and no filter, how do you go about doing some damage? Well when you see the kind of products that are available in the Infowars Store, it’s going to take a lot. And this might be one of his worst. I mean after all, you got to get kids started on racism when they’re young!

Conspiracy theorist Alex Jones is selling a “limited edition” of a children’s book that depicts President Donald Trump as a cartoon bunny named Thump. The book promotes white nationalist imagery and makes light of the video of Trump admitting to sexually assaulting women and the national outrage that followed.

On one page that Jones showed, the text read, “Thump found friends in strange places and in all shapes and sizes. Such as the frogs that croaked ‘KEK!’ They were full of surprises!”

The line is a reference to Pepe the Frog, an originally innocuous cartoon that was transformed into a talisman for white nationalism during the 2016 presidential campaign.

The book also references a video released in October 2016 that showed Trump bragging about sexually assaulting women. Thump reads, “Thump was caught talking of grabbing all things pusillanimous. Protesters even made pink hats: their ire was unanimous.”

Yeah so that is real. That is a product that really exists! And speaking of bad products we’ve pointed out on this program about how Alex Jones’ Infowars and Gwenyth Paltrow’s GOOP aren’t really that different when you think about it. But the good news is that the Sandy Hook parents aren’t taking this shit lightly. I really can’t wait until Alex is preaching to an empty jail cell or cardboard box.

The father of a slain Sandy Hook Elementary student has a message for Alex Jones: He’s ready to take him down.

“To say that Sandy Hook was a hoax and it never happened, its an outright lie,” Neil Heslin told NBC’s Today Show host Megyn Kelly Thursday. “It’s a total disrespect to myself, my son, the individuals who lost their lives that day. It extends so much further than that. It’s disrespect to the community, to law enforcement, to the first responders. It’s not right. And it needs to stop.”

Heslin’s six-year-old son was gunned down in December 2012 in Newtown, Connecticut, along with 19 other small children and six adults.

Jones has peddled a false narrative for years on his website, Infowars, claiming the shooting was a hoax. In lawsuits filed Monday and first reported by HuffPost, Heslin and two other parents are now suing Jones for defamation. The parents are each seeking more than $1 million in damages.

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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Since Trump is only taking up one entry this week we have to squeeze as much out of it as we can but before we get into the meat of this entry I have to bring up one story that caught our attention over the weekend. Remember a couple of weeks ago when Trump called Jeff Sessions “Mr. Magoo” at a closed door meeting? Well, just like Alex Jones, it turns out that he didn’t say that thing that everyone knows that he said.

President Donald Trump is denying he ever called Attorney General Jeff Sessions "Mr. Magoo," saying he knows nothing about the bumbling cartoon character.

In a weekend tweet, the president said the Washington Post story referring to the "Mr. Magoo" comment was nothing but "fake" news. Trump also denies calling Deputy Attorney General Jay Rosenstein "Mr. Peepers," a reference to a television characters from the 1950s.

The Washington Post reported in February on the "Mr. Magoo" nickname for Sessions, a one-time Trump ally turned frequent target of presidential criticism.


Fake news! You know what sir? Don’t give my regards to Mr. Magoo! Now let’s get into what I originally wanted to talk about - past presidents – let’s talk about them! Remember when we used to have a respectable leader that we could get behind? Yeah I miss those times. Even the republicans used to elect presidents who at one point or another, were respectable. But in 2016 all of those rules got thrown out the window. So you might be wondering where I’m going with this – take a look at our current president. He’s not even welcome at state funerals!

Washington (CNN)President Donald Trump will not attend Saturday's funeral service for former first lady Barbara Bush, the White House said in a statement Thursday, citing the desire to "avoid disruptions" and out of respect for her family and friends.

"First Lady Melania Trump will attend the memorial service for Barbara Bush this Saturday on behalf of the First Family. To avoid disruptions due to added security, and out of respect for the Bush Family and friends attending the service, President Trump will not attend," the White House said in a statement.

President Trump offered his condolences to the Bush family Wednesday as he began remarks at a joint news conference with Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe.
Barbara Bush, Trump said, was a "wonderful, wonderful person" and "a titan in American life."

"Her strength and toughness really embodied the spirit of our country," Trump said at Mar-a-Lago. "She was a woman of proud patriotism and profound faith."

Yes – stay classy, Trump! So we went from a president who actually attends state funerals to one who live tweets them! Talk about a huge drop off in quality. So what did Trump do when Melania was at Barbara Bush’s funeral? Only his favorite hobby. Which he’s not very good at.

Sometimes a picture is worth a zillion words. The viral group photograph from former first lady Barbara Bush’s funeral speaks volumes about the state of our democracy, poignantly illustrating what we have lost and must at all costs regain.

George H.W. Bush is front and center in his wheelchair. Behind him, left to right, we see Laura and George W. Bush, Bill and Hillary Clinton, Barack and Michelle Obama, and Melania Trump. It is an extraordinary portrait of power, continuity, legacy, civility and mutual respect — a remarkable tableau that is made possible only by President Trump’s absence. Imagine him in the picture, puffed-up and no doubt scowling, trying desperately to make himself the center of attention. It’s a good thing he decided to spend the weekend playing golf and writing angry tweets at Mar-a-Lago instead.

I can’t look at that photo without pondering how destructive Trump has been — and how much work and goodwill it will take to put the pieces together again after he’s gone.

The elder Bush pursued conservative policies. Clinton was center-left. The younger Bush took the country back to the right. Obama pulled it to the left. These shifts seemed big and important at the time, but they pale in comparison with the disruption Trump has wrought.

But then Trump followed that up with his second favorite hobby – which he is good at – live tweeting! I mean come on, you got to admit he is good at that. Only Donald J. Trump can topple whole governments with a single tweet, like a really fucked up Superman!

Personalities on MSNBC’s “Morning Joe” on Monday criticized President Trump for tweeting on Saturday during the funeral for former first lady Barbara Bush.

Co-host Mika Brzezinski called Trump’s tweets “especially insulting to the United States of America” on a day “the world said goodbye to Barbara Bush.”

Panelist Mike Barnicle referenced a photo that went viral after the funeral showing current first lady Melania Trump; former Presidents George H.W. Bush, Bill Clinton, George W. Bush and Barack Obama; and former first ladies Hillary Clinton, Laura Bush and Michelle Obama.

“It’s a reminder of who we used to be as a government and as people who participated in politics,” Barnicle said.

Oh come on Joe! You’re just now realizing how bad Trump’s tweets are? There are lists out there compiling everything he’s insulted since he joined in 2009. And Trump insults your show while insulting whatever they talked about on Fox News! His insults are like fine wines – you have to let them ferment to get the most enjoyment out of them. But yeah even at Trump’s funeral, he was still outclassed by the last guy!

A lot has been said in regard to the chemistry between US President Donald Trump and his wife Melania Trump. On numerous occasions, the FLOTUS was said to have looked ‘not happy’ with her husband and it became a talk of the Twitterverse. From swatting away his hands in public and awkward handshakes, to him leaving her during the inaugural dance alone to wave at the crowd — Twitterati haven’t missed a thing. So, naturally, when on Saturday, they spotted the FLOTUS sitting alongside Barack Obama and smiling — it got everyone talking.

The Obamas, Clintons along with the Bush family and Melania Trump attended the funeral of Barbara Bush in Houston, Texas. Although a solemn service, during the event, she was seen engaging in a conversation with Barack Obama and Tweeple ruled, “it’s the happiest they have ever seen her”.

Former US first lady Barbara Bush, the wife of former President George HW Bush, passed away at age 92 on Tuesday (April 17). Although FLOTUS attended the ceremony, POTUS Trump gave it a miss, to ‘avoid disruptions’.

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[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Phi Kappa Kek
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It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is:

Fraternities. And fraternity life. Made famous by movies like Animal House and more recently flicks like Neighbors. But these days fraternities aren’t the funny university play houses like you see in those comedy movies. They have taken a much more dark and far more sinister turn. So for this story we’re heading to upstate New York to Syracuse University and a seedy underbelly that is hindering Greek life on the campus.

SYRACUSE, NY (WRVO) – Everything is on the table, according to Syracuse University officials, including expulsion, for the 18 students involved in racist videos by the Theta Tau fraternity. SU officials said it will be a fair but expeditious disciplinary process.

Syracuse University Chancellor Kent Syverud said Monday while he believes in freedom of speech, the behavior in the videos involves conduct, as well as speech.

“That conduct is the reason this is part of the student judicial process,” Syveryud said.

Each case is being reviewed separately. The students will get the chance to tell their side of the story. A university conduct board will make a decision and that can be appealed. Dolan Evanovich, the senior vice president of Enrollment and the Student Experience, said their code of conduct covers behavior, harassment and hazing.

“There are multiple offenses that could be brought into play,” Evanovich said. “There are multiple codes that have been violated and each of them have a disciplinary process associated with it, and a disciplinary result associated with it. We will be reviewing each individual case with each individual student who has committed an individual code of conduct violation.”

But this isn’t Animal House – yes this fraternity is under something far worse than Double Secret Probation. Most likely Quadruple Secret Probation. Hazing has become a huge problem in the last 10 years mainly for how out of control its’ become. And the Theta Taus are no different. In fact its’ a problem that has become so out of control that what choice do universities have?

Deadly alcohol overdoses, sexual assault, hazing and racism — that’s at least partly what you get when joining a frat. The latest case at Syracuse (N.Y.) University of racism should be the icing on the cake for colleges and universities to ban them.

Is there really no other way to achieve camaraderie in college than to join a fraternity where you leave your good decision-making skills at the door?

Syracuse has not gone far enough in the school’s reaction to a pair of lewd videos created by more than a dozen members of the Theta Tau fraternity.

Eighteen students were pulled “from academic participation” after two videos surfaced showing them in offensive skits using racist, homophobic and anti-Semitic language, as well as mocking individuals with disabilities.

There wont be any Jack Daniels chugging in this fraternity. But they did issue an apology but that was apparently too little too late for the university deans. Well, we can’t blame them for channeling their inner Dean Wormer.

SYRACUSE, N.Y. -- Syracuse University permanently expelled the Theta Tau fraternity over an offensive video that surfaced this past week.

The university announced the expulsion on its website Saturday afternoon, three days after officials learned of the video, which shows brothers of the professional engineering fraternity acting out a racist, anti-Semitic oath.

The video, first published by The Daily Orange student newspaper, depicts pledges of the fraternity performing a "roast" of their brothers. Fraternity leaders said in an apology the "skit" was intended as a parody of a conservative, Republican brother.

In the performance, brothers take an oath to "Tri Kappa": "I solemnly swear to have hatred in my heart for n*ggers, sp*cs and most importantly the f*ckin' k*kes."

Well the grades don’t matter anymore but let this serve as a lesson to fraternities – don’t pull this shit again, and this isn’t funny. But this seems to be a growing problem stemming across the country and deans don’t know how to deal with it. Take a look at what is happening at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo.

Only a day after a spiraling incidents of racism pushed Cal Poly to suspend the majority of its Greek organizations, Syracuse University in New York suspended one of its own fraternities for a racist video showing members imitating sex acts and using racial slurs for black, Jewish and Hispanic people.

The video, which was originally published by campus newspaper The Daily Orange, appears to show a scripted performance by members of Theta Tau, a professional engineering fraternity.

At one point in the video, two men repeat a racial slur-filled oath swearing to "always have hatred in my heart for n-----s, sp-cs, and most importantly ... the f---in' k-kes."

Could the problem be that we as a society live in a racist country that has become immune to this sort of behavior? The answer is probably. The problem isn’t just with these kids but with society in general and we have failed to teach our young generation about the consequences of their racism. And there were also incidents at Penn State and Rutgers.

Videos containing a racial slur uttered repeatedly by two white women — one purportedly a Penn State University student and the other a William Paterson University student — drew ire on social media and are under investigation by both schools.

The universities in separate statements shared Monday condemned the two videos, as did the international headquarters of the sorority Delta Phi Epsilon. A statement by the organization said it had removed one of its members over the incident.

The videos surfaced over the weekend, and both used the same derogatory word for black people.

In one, a woman in an elevator wearing blue-and-white clothing with Penn State's name and the Nittany Lion logo raises her right hand, as if to sing into a microphone.

Yes they are finished. But the problem isn’t just with one fraternity – it’s with the whole system. That is it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

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[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Gather around my fair brothers and sisters! It’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it’s time to remind you why the holiest among us are the most full of:

My fair congregation, we have a sinner among us! But that sinner does not sit within the walls of this house. No! He sits in the walls of the grandest house of them all – the White House! Yes, for we have elected a man who is the ultimate sinner! No one has committed more sins than he has! We are going to find out why the holiest among us love this man even though he represents the worst among us! You know people give Fox News a lot of shit for being state run television, but if you really want to see what that’s like, look no further than the Trinity Broadcast Network!

HENDERSONVILLE, Tenn. — The Music City campus of the Trinity Broadcasting Network is about a half-hour drive from Music City itself, in a placid Nashville suburb on a bend in the Cumberland River where the main road through town is called the Johnny Cash Parkway. TBN, America’s largest Christian television network, acquired the complex in 1994 after the death of country singer Conway Twitty, who had operated it as a sprawling tourist attraction he called Twitty City. Last year, TBN renovated Twitty’s personal auditorium, leveling the floor, adding large neon signs and a faux-brick backdrop under the original Corinthian columns. The resulting TV set looks like an urban streetscape framed by a Greek temple.

On a February night, in his large office just above the auditorium, the network’s biggest star is making last-minute plans for what’s shaping up to be a busy evening. First, Mike Huckabee fields some logistics for dinner at his nearby condo, where he will host three couples who won the privilege in a charity auction. He takes a call from the actor Jon Voight, who tells Huckabee he is free to do an interview about Israel. (Huckabee leaves the next day for Jerusalem, where TBN opened another studio a few years ago.) He checks with one of his producers about an old “Laugh-In” clip Huckabee had requested. “We aren’t paying $6,500 for it, good gosh!” he laughs when he hears the cost of the snippet. “Did they point a gun at your head and wear a ski mask when you asked that?” (They decide not to use it.)

Two hours later, Huckabee walks onto a stage in front of more than 200 people and kicks off a taping of his hourlong cable show. For nearly all of its 45-year history, Trinity’s programming had been strictly religious, a mix of evangelical preachers, gospel music and a flagship talk show called “Praise the Lord” (now just “Praise”). But Huckabee’s show is saturated with politics. The former two-term governor of Arkansas and one-time Iowa caucus winner opens with a disquisition on the Fourth Amendment (“Our system is designed to make sure the government is your servant”) leading into a pre-taped interview with Senator Rand Paul. It’s followed by an appearance by Kayleigh McEnany, the Republican National Committee spokeswoman and a frequent campaign surrogate for Donald Trump. The crowd roars with laughter when Huckabee promises he won’t go on for as long as Nancy Pelosi, a reference to her recent filibuster-style speech on the House floor. “Can you imagine Nancy Pelosi for eight hours?” he asks, chuckling. “NO!” the audience shouts back.

Why yes, it does say that in our Bible sir! Yes, so Christian conservatives are apparently more horrified at the thought of having Nancy Pelosi, but seem perfectly OK with what Donald Trump did with a magazine behind closed doors! Yes I realize I am violating the laws as put forth by this great country by talking about the guy that we call president, but all of those laws were thrown out the window! And Nancy Pelosi is not the only Congress person they are targeting!

Religious Right leaders are waging an outrageously dishonest smear campaign against Sen. Cory Booker. Their distortions and ludicrous lies would be shocking if they were not part of a long pattern of conservative Christian leaders smearing their political opponents as enemies of faith and freedom.

This episode started with the Senate confirmation hearing for secretary of state nominee Mike Pompeo. Booker raised important questions about Pompeo’s long and close association with promoters of anti-Muslim bigotry and conspiracy theories.

When Pompeo basically refused to address that record, Booker moved on to Pompeo’s opposition to legal equality for LGBTQ people, and his embrace of harshly anti-LGBTQ rhetoric. And when Pompeo again tried to dismiss those concerns, Booker asked him pointedly about whether he considered homosexuality a perversion.

This was in the context, Booker made clear, of the fact that the secretary of state represents U.S. values abroad, and his question had a clear policy implication. During the Obama administration, the U.S. government was a powerful advocate for the lives and rights of LGBTQ people in places where they face brutality from their own governments. Booker wanted to know if the U.S. would abandon those vulnerable people in order to placate Religious Right groups that have resented and resisted American pro-equality advocacy.

Yes because if there’s one thing JAYSUS did it’s promote bigotry. Because bigotry is a SIN!!! It is the most egregious of sins!!!! And it will take you to a very dark place!!! Can I get an amen? But my fair congregation, the reason why the holiest among us trust the unholiest among us is a truly disturbing one, and very complex! It has many layers and the good LAWRD wouldn’t recommend peeling them back! But we will!

Charisma, the Trump-supporting Pentecostal media operation, is promoting video of a sermon based in part on Republican operative and “historian” David Barton’s book “Original Intent.” It’s the kind of sermon that should warm the hearts of Religious Right leaders like Barton and David Lane, who complain that pastors aren’t preaching Christian-nation politics aggressively enough.

Charisma circulated a video excerpt of a sermon by Shane Idleman speaking at Westside Christian Fellowship in Leona Valley, California. “I’m so sick of this politically correct culture that can’t offend anyone—except believers,” said Idleman, charging that the culture is trying to silence the church and “the voice of truth.”

Waving his Bible, he said, “I’ll give you this when you pry it out of my cold, dead hands.”

“The pulpit sets the tone for the nation, not Fox News and CNN,” he said, arguing that Americans should look to the Bible for answers about immigration, guns, gay marriage, and other issues. But, he said, “they” want to “silence the pulpit. ‘You just do your little church stuff, let us control the world. Let us control the United States.’”

Funny, I don’t remember that part in the Bible where it said to shoot first and ask questions later! And speaking of shooting first and asking questions later, to understand the unholy one, you must understand the people who support him! Because if you attack the thing they love most (and its’ not their children) then you attack them!

Earlier this month, right-wing pastor, radio host, and former Constitution Party presidential nominee Chuck Baldwin declared that it was a “biblical requirement” for every Christian to own an assault-style rifle and that those who don’t are “worse than a heathen.” Shortly after making that statement, Baldwin delivered an entire sermon on the subject at his Liberty Fellowship church in Montana, during which he asserted that any effort at gun reform “is an attack from hell itself.”

“I tell you the truth,” Baldwin said. “Satan and his minions have, in their minds, determined that now is the time to attack the God-given duty and liberty of people to defend themselves and to take away from us our ability to do that. This is a concerted attack, not from liberal Democrats and neocon Republicans, this is an attack from hell itself.”

Baldwin insisted that the requirement to own an assault rifle for self-defense is “a God-given law,” therefore “any attack on this law is an attack on God’s law” that is no different than the government declaring that Christian churches cannot preach the gospel or baptize converts or support missionary efforts.

Yes the good LAWRD is speechless! But here’s why the unholy one speaks to the holy ones, despite that the good LAWRD warned of this in the good book. He sayeth “the dark one will pose as a creature of light” and truer words have never been spoken! Which is why the unholy one surrounds himself with holy ones!

Ralph Drollinger, who runs fundamentalist Bible studies for dozens of members of Congress and President Trump’s Cabinet every week, said in a fundraising letter this month that his group “has been blessed by God with extraordinary growth beyond our wildest imaginings in foreign nations across the globe and most notably in former Soviet Bloc countries.”

As RWW has reported, Drollinger’s Capitol Ministries is dedicated to teaching public officials a very conservative take on the Bible. Drollinger teaches that “the absolutely critical preeminent duty of the Church in an institutionally separated society” is “to convert the soul and disciple—Christianize—the leaders of the State and its citizenry.” In his recent letter he cites a biblical charge to evangelize kings and writes, “We reach leaders not because their souls are more precious to God, but because their influence upon the world is so great.”

Drollinger says he and Trump share “a Biblical understanding of the issues” and that Trump sends him handwritten notes praising his weekly written Bible studies. “I just love the guy,” he says. U.S. Secretary of Agriculture Sonny Perdue, among Drollinger’s students in the Cabinet, was the headliner at a major Capitol Ministries fundraising event in February.

We noted last fall that Drollinger is aggressively expanding his operations both at the local government level in the U.S. and in national capitals around the world. His April 4 letter includes some details about the latter:

There you have it, the reason why the holiest among us love the unholy one is that he speaks their language! Mass has ended may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]The Alt Right
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The tribal mentality that has taken over this country has reached epic proportions. And no one does it better than the Alt Right. Or alt lite. Or Diet Reduced Calorie Sugar Free Alt Lite (now with 50% fewer cucks!). Excuse me a minute. This week, Kanye West returns to Twitter and well, he hasn’t really changed that much. Except for the fact that he’s tweeting out some bizarre shit and going full Alt Right.

Kanye West was having a great weekend, until he wasn’t. One moment, the rapper-producer-entrepreneur was dispensing pearls of pseudo-philosophy on Twitter to the retweets of adoring observers. The next, many of those same admirers had turned to denouncing him instead. Oh, and he had become an alt-right darling. Whatever West is going through at the moment, the response to his Twitter spree reveals more about the people who have fled from him — and those who’ve flocked to him, too.

West’s fortunes reversed when he expressed his admiration on Saturday for red-pill YouTuber Candace Owens, an African American Donald Trump supporter known for, among other things, referring to Black Lives Matter protesters as “whiny toddlers, pretending to be oppressed for attention.” The following day, he tweeted nine videos from Scott Adams, who gained his fame first for creating the cartoon “Dilbert” and second for proclaiming that rape is a “natural instinct” of men and society a “virtual prison for men’s natural desires.”

It’s easy to cast West as just another lost man seduced by the far right’s promise to provide a sense of purpose. All that pseudo-philosophy does suggest a preoccupation with the sort of existential problems figures such as psychologist Jordan Peterson, who has become a surprise lifestyle guru, claim they can solve. It’s also possible to connect West’s eccentric behavior on Twitter — this isn’t the first time his forays into politics have discomfited some fans — to the mental-health struggles that led to his 2017 hospitalization.

It’s about ideas, bro!!! And information!!! Yeah that’s my best Kanye impression here. But I love that somehow the most racist people on the planet can find solace in people who they would normally despise in IRL but like Trump he says what they want to hear. There’s more to it than that. Kanye has definitely drank the Alt Right Kool Aid.

Add this to the growing list of things we did not anticipate a Donald Trump administration would usher in: Kanye West, alt-right icon.

Kanye’s road from Jay-Z’s beat-maker to right-wing internet hero has been an unexpected one. He was once known as the artist who mainstreamed conscious rapping with songs like “All Falls Down” and “Diamonds Are Forever,” the man who once declared “Bush doesn’t care about black people” live on NBC.

But Kanye shocked fans when he met with the incoming president at Trump Tower in 2016. He reviled fans when he took one of his trademark concert rants to declare that he would’ve voted for Trump in the election had he cast a ballot.

West retreated from the spotlight for some time after the blowback he faced for his Trump comments. But now he’s very much back on online, and has apparently been spending a little too much time in the annals of YouTube.

That sounds about right. But politics does make for strange bedfellows. Remember that guy who used to occupy the nightly 8:00 slot on Fox News – Bill O’Reilly? Anyone remember that guy? Well he defends Kanye after spending decades destroying and undermining rap music.

In case you weren’t aware, nothing makes any sense anymore. Only in a world where Donald Trump is the President, could we imagine Bill O’Reilly and Kanye West batting for the same ideological team. The conservative news pundit took West’s defense, claiming the rapper was being attacked by “American Stalinists” following the rapper’s tweet, which lauded über-right, Trumpette media personality Candace Owens.


Anyway, O’Reilly went off on people who were calling Kanye out, with a post on his website. “But the American Stalinist movement has no use for democracy, and that is a growing danger to this country… This mob mentality has gone far beyond political correctness. In the past year, America has witnessed a frightening number of Stalinist-type attacks on free expression. If you disagree with Black Lives Matter, for example, you are shut down as a bigot. If you suggest due process to the Me Too Movement, you are a misogynist. If you wear a sombrero as part of a Halloween costume at Yale, you are denigrating a minority group and therefore must be punished. In addition, the totalitarians believe that religious Americans including clergy have no right to opt out of funding abortions. If you protest that your tax dollars are being used for fetus termination or birth control, you are a human rights violator, not worthy of being heard,” he wrote. O’Reilly also contends that “ALL Caucasians are being branded as racists simply because of their skin color.” Now find the nearest wall, and bang your head into it.

Ooooooooooooh, does this mean that I’m an American Stalinist? What does that even mean, O’Reilly? Oh and by the way I saw the American Stalinists at the Troubadour last week – awesome band. But getting back on topic, it does seem like Kanye is a Trump supporter. Someone who definitely has more money than brains apparently. I wish I had that problem!

If you thought Kanye West’s tweet over the weekend recommending the ideas of right-wing activist Candace Owens was a fluke, well, prepare to think again. Early Monday afternoon, West tweeted snippets of a 22-minute video by Scott Adams, the erstwhile “Dilbert” cartoonist and would-be pro-Trump thought leader, in which Adams framed West’s praise of Owens as heralding the dawn of a golden age. West’s tweet had, according to Adams, “altered reality”: Suddenly, the fans of Owens, a black woman who’s made a career for herself calling Black Lives Matter protesters whiners, were exposed to the possibility that Kanye West was one of them, and West’s fans were doing a double take as well. To Adams and West alike, it was clear that cracks in the walls of our “mental prisons” had emerged: Existence was on the verge of shifting to a higher plane, and Kanye West was the catalyst of its transcendence.

Anyone online has something to promote; usually, their own selves. Adams’s video, which suggests, among other things, that the Civil War was resolved within the heads of white people and that the civil-rights movement was a matter of tinkering with laws, concludes with a shout-out to his Patreon; West, meanwhile, has several forthcoming albums to promote. They have, for now, different followings on different scales. Adams has roughly 228,000 Twitter followers; West, 15 million and rising. But the ultimate social media self-promoter seems to live inside their heads. Though West excerpted only the portions of Adams’s video having to do with West himself, a quick listen to the original finds it filled with fulsome praise for Donald Trump, unconventional thinker par excellence. Trump’s genius, according to Adams, lies in his ability to break out of the mentalities we take for granted. Trump wasn’t a politician, but he became the president; he talked about immigration despite the puny-minded finding his talk racist; he’s in the midst of trade wars and negotiating with North Korea when no one said either could be done. And Kanye, for his part, is still onboard the Trump train: A recent phone argument with Ebro saw West avowing to the Hot 97 radio personality, “I love Donald Trump.”

But at least Kanye took the time out to audition to be Trump's BFF. We are both dragon energy!!! Ideas!!! Information!!! Being the best!!!


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[font size="8"]Focus On The Family
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I have to hand it to our good friends at Right Wing Watch – the Top 10 would not exist without the content you guys put out every day calling out right wing bigots for their actions. And I love it when the bigots get pissed when they get called on their bullshit. Take for example our buddy Dave Daubenmire:


Miliions? Right, Dave! Keep telling yourself that! That obviously very poorly photoshopped stadium backdrop you stand in front of for every video is going wild! Well when people fight back against Right Wing Watch, they fight back harder. So the James Dobson institution Focus On The Family got called out for declaring themselves a church.

Focus on the Family told the IRS in 2016 that it needed to be recognized as a church in order to avoid the Affordable Care Act’s mandate on insurance coverage for contraception and other regulations, according to documents that we have obtained from the IRS.

We reported in February that Focus on the Family, the influential Religious Right organization founded by James Dobson, is now classified as a church by the IRS, meaning that it does not have to file publicly available tax documents like most nonprofits do. In response to our request, the IRS sent us copies of its correspondence with Focus about the change in its status.

Those documents reveal that the IRS was initially skeptical of Focus’ claims but gave in after Focus’ lawyers insisted that the organization meets most of the tax agency’s criteria for houses of worship and that even questioning their status as a church could violate the First Amendment.

In May 2016, Focus wrote to the IRS requesting reclassification as a church, claiming that for “its entire existence, Focus on the Family has been a religious tax-exempt organization with many of the essential elements of a church.” It warned of the “adverse impact” it would face if the request was denied, namely that it would not be able to take advantage of “a number of religious exemptions” in law that “apply only to churches and church organizations.”

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Funny I’ve read and studied the 1st Amendment, I can’t find the part where it says “applies only to churches”! So rather than actually pay their taxes, Focus On The Family simply declared themselves a church, because, Jesus. So Right Wing Watch gets involved and calls them out on it:

Focus on the Family is defending its decision to have the Internal Revenue Service officially reclassify the Christian nonprofit as a "church," denouncing the efforts of some to ascribe "sinister" intentions to the change.

An article published in February by the liberal group People for the American Way's Right Wing Watch site documenting Focus on the Family's reclassification has been getting extensive attention in recent weeks.

The piece noted that the Colorado-based conservative Christian organization has long identified as a non-church 501(c)(3) nonprofit. By 2015 fiscal year, it had been relabeled a "church."

Paul Batura, vice president of communications for Focus on the Family, told The Christian Post that the news stories on their reclassification as a church give "sinister and fictitious motives to our application."

Yeah that’s about what it is like. Well anyway here’s how the whole thing went down and it’s utterly spectacular when Christians get called out on their bullshit. And Focus On The Family is an organization that does nothing but peddle bullshit. So when Right Wing Watch called them out on it, here’s what happened!

Focus on the Family, the behemoth Religious Right organization founded by James Dobson, has declared itself to be a church, thereby avoiding a requirement that it file public tax documents, according to IRS records and a document available on the organization’s website.

Focus on the Family filed as a non-church 501(c)(3) nonprofit as recently as the 2014 fiscal year, submitting to the IRS a publicly available Form 990 as most tax-exempt nonprofits are required to do. But when the group posted a Form 990 for the 2015 fiscal year on its website—dated October 26, 2017, and reporting a massive budget of $89 million—it was emblazoned with the message “Not required to file and not filed with the IRS. Not for public inspection.”

On the part of the form on which it is required to identify the reason for its public charity status, the group indicates that it is a “church, convention of churches or association of churches.” In an “explanation of church status,” the organization states that while it hasn’t filed with the IRS because the IRS has told it that it’s “not required” to do so, it would “post a pro-forma 990 on our website and make copies available to donors.”

Yeah they get the message about as accurately as Cartman does. This is what happens when you don’t teach a society how to read! So here’s how FOTF responded:

Focus on the Family told the IRS in 2016 that it needed to be recognized as a church in order to avoid the Affordable Care Act’s mandate on insurance coverage for contraception and other regulations, according to documents that we have obtained from the IRS.

We reported in February that Focus on the Family, the influential Religious Right organization founded by James Dobson, is now classified as a church by the IRS, meaning that it does not have to file publicly available tax documents like most nonprofits do. In response to our request, the IRS sent us copies of its correspondence with Focus about the change in its status.

Those documents reveal that the IRS was initially skeptical of Focus’ claims but gave in after Focus’ lawyers insisted that the organization meets most of the tax agency’s criteria for houses of worship and that even questioning their status as a church could violate the First Amendment.

In May 2016, Focus wrote to the IRS requesting reclassification as a church, claiming that for “its entire existence, Focus on the Family has been a religious tax-exempt organization with many of the essential elements of a church.” It warned of the “adverse impact” it would face if the request was denied, namely that it would not be able to take advantage of “a number of religious exemptions” in law that “apply only to churches and church organizations.”

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[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
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Hit it!

So of course you know by now that people are people, and people are dumb. So I want to start with this story out of Argentina. Where the university of Buenos Aires was experimenting on mice using THC, the drug that is found in the cannabis plant. And here’s the thing. If you’re studying the affects of addiction on animals, maybe you should keep your stash of what you’re experimenting with locked up. Because when it goes missing, you have no one to blame but your own stupidity.

What a ratty thing to do ― blaming mice for 1,000 pounds of missing marijuana.

That’s the dubious excuse eight police officers in Pilar, Argentina, gave after a half-ton of pot disappeared from a police warehouse.

About 13,000 pounds of bud were supposed to be in storage, but a recent police inspection revealed 1,000 pounds were missing, according to The Guardian.

Javer Specia, the city’s former police commissioner, was ordered to explain the shortfall to a judge. He and three subordinates told the skeptical jurist the missing marijuana must have been eaten by mice.

Experts, however, sent that theory up in smoke, saying rodents wouldn’t confuse marijuana with food. In the off-chance they did, the mice likely would have died from the dope, and investigators would have found the cannabis-laden corpses, according to USA Today.

We’re not low! Next in People Are Dumb, while on the subject of stoned animals, you know one animal you should never get stoned? Raccoons! But maybe it would make raccoons slightly less insane than they already are? Or more, I’m not sure how that would work.

People call the emergency services for all kinds of unusual reasons, but this one is definitely unique.

A woman turned up at a fire station in Indianapolis in the middle of the night saying her pet needed help - but it wasn't the obvious reason of a cat being stuck in a tree.

She said her pet raccoon had been exposed to a large amount of cannabis.

Wayne Township Fire Captain Mike Pruitt said his team were "scratching their heads" after the incident.

Stoned Raccoons by the way, I hear they were great at Coachella. Next up, what is a “People Are Dumb” segment without a trip to our favorite state – Florida? And I love stupid criminal stories. And this one might be one of my favorites.

A Florida Man arrested early Thursday on a drunk driving charge was in his underwear behind the wheel, according to cops who noted that the suspect’s drawers were imprinted with the word “breathalyzer” and the phrase “blow here,” which was “near his genitals.”

After spotting a Dodge pickup truck weaving on a Port St. Lucie highway around 3 AM, a cop pulled the vehicle over outside a Best Western hotel, according to an arrest affidavit.

The driver, Daryle Lee Campbell, was handcuffed due to his “furtive actions and for officer safety.” Campbell, 54, had been spotted throwing a “black object” from his truck, though the item was not recovered by police.

During questioning, Campbell claimed that he was en route to help a friend who had a flat tire. Campbell--barefoot and in his underwear--seemed jittery, was unsteady on his feet, and appeared “under the influence of a stimulant,” the affidavit notes. After Campbell declined to perform field sobriety tests, he was arrested on a DUI charge.

What’s that? How dare you suggest that he’s wearing a MAGA hat, sir! But yeah he probably was. Next up we’re going north to Florida’s next door neighbors for another great stupid criminal story.

Georgia police have identified the man who burglarized a GameStop store while wearing the world’s worst disguise--the plastic wrapping used to package water bottles.

Cops report that Kerry Hammond Jr. is wanted in connection with last Friday’s burglary of the video game store in St. Marys, a city in Georgia’s southeastern corner.

Investigators allege that the 22-year-old Hammond sought to hide his identity by wearing the plastic wrapping around his head. But Hammond--who is 6’ 1” and 275 pounds, did a poor job obscuring his face, as seen in video surveillance stills released by police. A distinctive tattoo on Hammond’s right forearm can also be seen in GameStop security video.

Hammond, last spotted driving a white 2006 Ford Taurus, has two other active felony warrants charging him with burglary and criminal damage to property.

Yeah it’s kind of like the scene in Big Trouble. And Georgia is next to Florida. Next up – another pothead story, and hey just in time for Super Troopers 2 (which is hilarious BTW), this one seems like it could have been lifted right out of the original Super Troopers!

April 19 (UPI) -- Police in Texas said they might have "set a record" when a recent arrest saw the seizure of the "longest joint ever."

The Fort Bend County Constable's Office Pct. 3 tweeted a photo of a rolled marijuana cigarette measuring 8 inches long.

"We think we set a record. Looooongest joint ever! Great work from Deputy Ochoa on this arrest. The subject attempted to destroy evidence as well," the tweet said.

The "joint" appears to actually be a blunt, as it was rolled with brown tobacco paper instead of thinner cigarette paper.

Finally this week for People Are Dumb – we’re going to end on a cartoonish note involving New York City mayor Bill DeBlasio. And it seems that the rats in New York City have officially become self aware. This could be lifted right out of an episode of “Itchy & Scratchy” on the Simpsons.

One wily rat made NYCHA look like a Mickey Mouse operation Tuesday in Brooklyn.

Mayor de Blasio and workers from the Housing Authority were outwitted by the rodent during a press event at a Bushwick project when it triumphantly escaped their clutches as they attempted to demonstrate a new high-tech extermination technique.

Like a scene from “Tom and Jerry,” workers fruitlessly tried to stomp on the agile rodent when it scurried from a hole in which dry ice had been dropped in an effort to control the furry pests.

One worker even swung a shovel at the plucky rat in a comical whack-a-mole routine.

But no one could lay a hand on the tiny animal, which dodged all the would-be rat-slayers at the Bushwick Houses and scampered to safety at a playground on Humboldt Street.


That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Stupidest State Contest: Round 2 Week 2
[br] [/font]

16 states will enter, but only one will be crowned the new Top 10 Conservative Idiots Stupidest State!

Welcome back! We are live in the Bay Area at the home of the Golden State Warriors, Oracle Arena, for the Family Values championship! Last week – we were at HP Pavilion for the Gun Nut Conference Championship in which Florida utterly routed last year’s Flyover League champions Montana in a venerable duel to the death. This week – it’s the Family Values championship. And only one state will move on to compete with Florida while the other state will go home. The reigning king of this conference – Alabama is taking on a brilliant and promising new challenger in Missouri. Will Missouri prevail and continue their Cinderella story or will Alabama dominate and keep their winning streak alive? Let’s find out!

[font size="6"]Family Values Championship: Alabama Vs Missouri [/font]

[font size="4"]Alabama[/font]

So last year we spent an almost exhausting amount of time covering the near Senate election of an actual pedophile – Roy Moore – to the senate. Yes, that guy could have been an actual Senator Of The United States. Just the thought of that alone is enough to make one cringe. But when it comes to the subject of Family Values, Alabama *OWNS* this category and it’s for an extremely good reason – they have one of the highest concentrations of churches in the entire country. If you want to see a preview of what this country would look like under a totalitarian religious fascist state, look no further than Alabama! You know they just can’t let the past go.

Alabama doesn't need "folks in Washington" or "out-of-state liberals" instructing the state on what it should do with Confederate monuments, Gov. Kay Ivey said Tuesday.

Ivey, during a campaign appearance in Foley, defended a new campaign ad released earlier in the day that touted the Alabama Memorial Preservation Act of 2017, which she signed into law less than 11 months ago.

"I believe the people agreed with that decision and support in protecting our historical monuments," Ivey said after speaking at a Baldwin County Young Republicans function. Her appearance also occurred one day before the Reckon by AL.com GOP governor's debate at 7 p.m. Wednesday at the Lyric Fine Arts Theatre in Birmingham. Ivey said she does not plan to attend.

"We can't and shouldn't even try to charge or erase or tear down our history. We must learn from our history," Ivey said.

Read more: http://www.al.com/news/index.ssf/2018/04/post_164.html

Yeah that sounds about right! So what does that have to do with the subject of family values, you might ask? Well I answer you – well the Confederacy was all about hate and slavery. Something which again, Alabama refuses to change with the times!

In 1968, shortly after gunning down Martin Luther King Jr. at the Lorraine Motel in Memphis, James Earl Ray was running from police, who were, he believed, right on his tail. He was looking for an escape route — a place where people might not be too upset by his crime.

He turned his Mustang towards Alabama.

Ray believed Alabamians would be sympathetic towards him, that then-Gov. George Wallace — whose hateful segregationist rhetoric had inspired Ray in the first place — would protect him, even pardon him, for killing King.

Alabama was his safe haven.

This has been the perpetual image of Alabama for decades now.

Read more: http://www.alreporter.com/2018/04/18/opinion-alabama-remains-a-safe-haven-for-hate/

Yes that. I think it’s always funny when liberals get called out for needing safe spaces but no one needs safe spaces more than straight white conservative males. And if you need any examples of the kind of people Alabama elects, they elect the most racist, sexist, backwoods, anti family values people they can find. And here’s one such example:

Many travelers along Interstate 65 have been wondering for more than a year what happened to the iconic sign with the image of a red-tailed Satan and the message "Go To Church or the Devil Will Get You." Whether passing motorists agreed with its sentiment, the sign was a well-known landmark that many will be happy to know is being replaced.

The sign, erected decades ago by W.S. "Bill" Newell, was toppled by a storm in fall of 2016. It was located on Newell's private property near the Verbena exit beside the north-bound lanes. Newell was known as a Christian and a patriot who enjoyed providing the message for motorists to contemplate.

Newell's sons, Sam and Keith, took over maintenance of the sign upon their father's death in 2009. A new signboard has been erected, this time closer to a picturesque mill waterwheel so that it is more visible to those traveling north, according to Althea Newell, wife of Sam Newell. The signboard is currently covered with blank, white paper.

Yeah believe or die. That always works well. I mean come on, this is a state that threw their own governor in jail and wrongly convicted him. And then they prevent any candidates with sensible issues from running because reasons!

ATHENS, Ala. -- A gay businessman and one-time police officer who is married to another man says GOP leaders in a north Alabama county refused to let him run for sheriff after a review that included questions about his sexual orientation.

Jason White told the News-Courier of Athens that members of the Limestone County Republican Executive Committee voted Tuesday to deny his bid for sheriff in a decision he believes is linked to the fact he is gay.

"I think it is obvious," he said.

White, 40, said he now plans to run for sheriff as an independent, and Republicans must find another candidate if they want an opponent for longtime incumbent Mike Blakely, a Democrat.

[font size="4"]Missouri [/font]

The last time we visited Missouri last year they were involved in one of the biggest clusterfucks in the entire country – the Furgeson police shootings. And the resulting riots that happened. It’s one of the biggest fuck ups ever. But Missouri has an even darker and much more sinister underbelly to it, and it’s not found on the streets of small towns. No, the real evil in Missouri is found in those buildings with crosses marked on them. Missouri has some of the highest concentrations of church related crimes in the entire country. So here’s just how seedy Missouri’s underbelly is. They will protect the fetus but if its’ actually born?

Jay Riseman was sued for malpractice 13 times during a 15-year career as a physician and surgeon in Illinois before coming to practice in Kansas City.

According to court records, in one case he failed to remove a catheter from a 68-year-old patient who then got an infection and died. Another case alleged that an infant died after Riseman gave her too much pre-surgery laxative.

The Illinois medical licensing board disciplined Riseman multiple times for medical errors, but that record didn't follow him when he went to work at three of Kansas City's biggest medical institutions. To this day his Missouri license lists him as a physician in good standing with no negative marks.

Riseman was among 500 doctors who have been disciplined in one state but have a clean license in at least one other identified in an investigation recently published by the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel and the website MedPage Today. The investigation determined there's no reliable national repository of public information on physicians' licenses.

Read more here: http://www.kansascity.com/news/business/health-care/article205352034.html

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Missouri will protect doctors that have been banned from practicing in other states because, abortion. That is a stunning level of evil. And by the way, anyone know if Trump needs a surgeon general? I mean come on this is a state that allows churches to hand out liquor licenses:

Springfield City Code grants schools, parks, churches and places of worship veto power over liquor licenses within 200 feet.

That practice is technically unconstitutional and for years now liquor licenses have been presented to City Council so elected officials have the final word on approval or denial, according to City Attorney Frank Romines.

A new council bill would "clean up" City Code so it reflects that alcohol licenses are ultimately a council decision, Romines said.

It's part of an ongoing effort by the law department to update code provisions that are out-of-date or redundant, Romines said. The change is not in response to any specific request or complaint.

Read more: http://www.news-leader.com/story/news/local/ozarks/2017/11/19/power-veto-nearby-liquor-licenses-no-longer-belongs-schools-churches-parks/860477001/

Yeah someone needs to go tell them that. But if you want to know the caliber of person that Missouri elects, and why they deserve to be the Family Values champions – just look at their governor Eric Greitens, who may be one of the country’s worst!

Missouri Gov. Eric Greitens (R), responding to media reports, acknowledged Wednesday night that he was unfaithful to his wife “a few years ago” before being elected. But his lawyer denied sensational allegations aired by a local TV station that Greitens threatened to distribute naked photos he took of the woman with whom he was having a relationship if she ever said anything about it.

The woman, who has not been named publicly, was Greitens’s hair stylist, according to media reports confirmed by The Washington Post with a source familiar with the situation.

A joint statement posted Wednesday night by Greitens and his wife, Sheena, said in part that “a few years ago . . . there was a time when he was unfaithful in our marriage. This was a deeply personal mistake. Eric took responsibility, and we dealt with this together honestly and privately.”

[font size="4"]And the winner is… [/font]

Oh man this was a solid matchup. Alabama and Missouri both brought their A game. Both teams went into a double over time with less than 30 seconds to go on the timer. Current score – 91 – 91. Will it be Floribama Shore or will Florida take on the Show Me State? And … it’s in!!!!! Missouri has won, they are celebrating on the court! Alabama is stunned, they are going home. Final score 94 – 91. Cut the net guys, you earned it!

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

We’re heading up north to the Pacific Northwest at the home of the Portland Trailblazers, Moda Center, for Round 2 Week 3 and this time it’s the Batshit Conference Championship! Will Kentucky prevail and head to the Final Four, or will Virginia bring their A game and continue their Cinderella story? Tune in to find out!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]The Offspring[/font]

My next guest is a legendary punk rock band from Orange County, California. They are going on tour with our good friends 311 this year and you can see them coming to a city near you. Playing their classic song “Gone Away” from their album “Ixnay On The Hombre”, give it up for the Offspring!

See you next week!


Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: City National Grove Of Anaheim, Anaheim, CA
Special Thanks To: City National Grove Management
Images: All images copyright belongs to respective copyright holders.
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Writing: Top 10 Writing Department
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Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

April 18, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-14: Debbie Does The Deep State Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-14: Debbie Does The Deep State Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! 15 minutes with us can save an average of 15% or more on your car insurance! We are back everybody! So I want to talk about some music news to start with. First off – I can’t wait for the autobiography of Flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers. And this is classic Peppers – his new autobiography is going to be titled “Acid For The Children”. And believe me, I bet Flea has some stories. And then there was Coachella. There were lots and lots of great things happening during the weekend. And some not as great. I love music as you know by the amount of bands and acts we’ve had on this show. And look in the age of “Me Too”, I might get some never ending shit for this, but do we really need pregnant women making sexy dance moves on stage? I’m looking at you, Cardi B. Yeah I think a whole lot of people were turned off by that. And can we talk about Cardi B for a minute? What is her appeal exactly? Her music is not that great, and she seems to be one of those “look at me” celebrities. Hey look at me, I’m 7 months pregnant and I can twerk on stage! Sorry but that ain’t sexy, Cardi. Some guys might get turned on by it. I mean shit, I’ve seen Porn Hub – there is some weird shit that gets posted on that site. But look as I’ve said before – this is a comedy show, not a horror movie. What? You can be pregnant and still be attractive! I look at it this way - there’s sexy and then there’s trying to be sexy, and Cardi B was trying to be sexy, and well, I would say don’t. Yes, I am ready to throw down on that sir. We’ve got 90 minutes here, I’ve got time to tangle! Yeah so I wasn’t exactly as impressed with Cardi B as some people are. OK enough of the intro. We got a lot of idiocy to get to – but first John Oliver is back and he uses tax day to explain very plainly how corporate America’s greed is screwing you over big time:

Taking the first slot this week of course is the guy who we currently call “president” and that is Donald J. Trump (1). When your ratings are in the toilet, what’s a guy who is obsessed with ratings supposed to do? I know! Send missiles to another country! With love. At number 2 this week is also the guy we call “president”, Donald Trump. So Caligula is going out golfing again, but this week, across the street from Mar-A-Shithole, Stormy Daniels is taking her show to the nearest strip club. Taking the third slot this week is Michael Cohen (3). Holy shit this is too damn good – Cohen’s mystery 3rd client has been revealed and it is too good. In the fourth slot is Congress V. Zuckerberg (4). Yeah the testimony between Congress and Mark Zuckerberg over how Facebook uses your data against you was a category 5 shit storm and we will cover the highlights from that. Taking the 5th slot is an all new installment of “Top 10 Investigates” and this week we’re going to take a look at all the things going on during tax day 2018. In the number 6 slot this week is of course our weekly sermon of all things holy, Holy Shit, and this week – our resident pastor is going to talk about the possibility of whether or not demons exist. At number 7 is a new installment of “This Fucking Guy” and this week we’re going to profile right wing billionaire Phil Anschutz, the owner of the Coachella festival. At number 8 is the Alt Right. So Alex Jones went off the deep end, while the Alt Right held a march in Boston – in the middle of a Monday afternoon. In the number 9 (NEIN!!!) slot we’ve got a new installment of “I Need A Drink” and this time we’re going to get drunk and discuss a documentary movie called “The King Of Kongs”. Would you be surprised to learn that the subject of the movie got busted for cheating? Well, it cant be that surprising. Finally this week it’s the start of the Elite 8 for our Stupidest State competition! This week we’re live from the home of the San Jose Sharks – HP Pavilion in San Jose – and it’s the Gun Nut Conference championship! This week – who will bring their big guns to the dance? Florida? Or will it be last year’s Flyover League champions Montana? Plus we’ve got some live music for you from Bay Area punk legends NOFX! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font]

So in case you’re living under a rock – or probably hiding under a rock – you know by now that the guy who we currently call president, Donald J Trump, created a fiery show of epic proportions that easily eclipsed the one happening on Saturday night in Indio. Look we get it – Assad is the bad guy here, and what he did is completely inexcusable. But of course with the real president of the United States – Vladimir Putin – pulling the strings, here’s what we get.

As President Trump basks in widespread approval for the U.S.-led missile strike aimed at Syrian chemical weapons installations, the White House still faces a quandary over U.S. policy toward that country's civil war — as well as some sharp questions about the president's war powers.

Trump has yet to articulate a long-term U.S. strategy for dealing with the grinding, multi-sided war in Syria, which has lasted more than seven years, killed hundreds of thousands and triggered an epic refugee crisis.

Only days before the missile attack, Trump had called for a rapid U.S. troop withdrawal from Syria, which critics said would yield control of the country to Russia and Iran, key allies of Syrian President Bashar Assad. Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) was among those who said that Trump's words had "emboldened" Assad to use chemical weapons.

Now, in a turnabout, Trump is promising to keep troops in Syria, according to France's president. Trump may also slap new sanctions on Russian companies, according to Nikki Haley, the U.S. ambassador to the United Nations.

Yeah so that happened. And come on it’s Donald Trump! Of course he’s going to declare it a success. But if this isn’t a grave misuse of presidential war powers I don’t know what is! So of course here’s where it all went south.

President Donald Trump declared "mission accomplished" on Saturday after the U.S.-led predawn airstrikes in Syria dealt what Pentagon officials called a "very serious blow" at "the heart of the Syrian chemical weapons program."

While Syrian television reported that the nation's air defenses had responded to the strikes, "none of our aircraft or missiles in this operation were successfully engaged" by President Bashar al-Assad's regime, said Lt. Gen. Kenneth McKenzie, the director of the Joint Chiefs of Staff.

"The Syrian response was remarkably ineffective," he told reporters Saturday morning.

Gee, where I have heard that before? Oh I know! Only one of the biggest political fuckups in history!

Yeah so this is a case of “same shit, different year”. And once again a blunder that is probably going to get a whole lot of people killed is back in the news. And that might be a new one on the list of phrases future presidents should probably avoid.

If there was a new employee handbook for people who’d just obtained the position of “leader of the free world,” there would be some surefire entries in the section about presidential phrases to avoid:

“I am not a crook,” would be an easy add, for reasons both obvious and historical. So would “I did not have sexual relations with that woman.”

New hires would be discouraged from summing up economic policy stances with the phrase: “Read my lips. No new taxes.”

And then there is “Mission Accomplished”, the historically loaded phrase US President Donald Trump tweeted Saturday after US-led airstrikes in coordination with British and French forces that struck the “heart” of Syria’s chemical weapons network.

“A perfectly executed strike last night. Thank you to France and the United Kingdom for their wisdom and the power of their fine Military. Could not have had a better result. Mission Accomplished!” Trump tweeted.

A perfectly executed strike! Nobody has better missiles than I do. Assad is a stupid loser. So yeah that happened. And not only is he defending it, he’s doubling down!

WASHINGTON (AP) — President Donald Trump on Sunday defended his use of the phrase “Mission Accomplished” to describe a U.S.-led missile attack on Syria’s chemical weapons program, even as his aides stressed continuing U.S. troop involvement and plans for new economic sanctions against Russia for enabling the government of Bashar Assad.

Stepping up the pressure on Syria’s president, U.S. Ambassador Nikki Haley indicated the sanctions to be announced Monday would be aimed at sending a message to Russia, which she said has blocked six attempts by the U.N. Security Council to make it easier to investigate the use of chemical weapons.

“Everyone is going to feel it at this point,” Haley said, warning of consequences for Assad’s foreign allies.
“The international community will not allow chemical weapons to come back into our everyday life,” she said. “The fact he was making this more normal and that Russia was covering this up, all that has got to stop.”

Trump tweeted Sunday that the strike was “perfectly carried out” and that “the only way the Fake News Media could demean was by my use of the term “Mission Accomplished.”” He added that he knew the media would “seize” on the phrase, but said it should be used often. “It is such a great Military term, it should be brought back,” he wrote.

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font]

Pop quiz hot shot! You’re the president of the United States and you just bombed the shit out of an Arab country! Where do you go to celebrate? Well if you’re Donald J Trump, you go to your favorite destination – Mar-A-Lago! For a few rounds of tax payer funded golf. By the way remember when Sean Hannity said this about presidents and golf?

Or when Trump said this?

But this week he’s going to have some unexpected company. That’s right – the strip club across the street from Mar-A-Shithole is going to be the home to a very special guest this week!

Stormy Daniels, who claims to have slept with a married President Donald Trump long before he successfully ran for the nation’s highest office, performed in a Florida burlesque show over the weekend—less than 5 miles away from the president’s famed "Winter White House," Mar-a-Lago.

Daniels, real name Stephanie Clifford, appeared at Ultra Gentleman’s Club in West Palm Beach, just a 10-minute drive from Trump’s estate and nestled right next door to Trump International Golf Club, The Palm Beach Post reported Sunday.

For Daniels, it was one of the many stops along her “Make America Horny Again” tour, an obvious reference to the president’s campaign mantra. She took the stage around 11:20 p.m., according to the Post, and was dressed like the superhero Wonder Woman.

Daniels was booked for the show in January, when reports about the $130,000 Daniels allegedly received from Trump's personal lawyer, Michael Cohen, began circulating. The club's manager, Stacy Saccal, said she was skeptical that Daniels's fame would last this long.

Really, Stacy? You’re surprised it would last this long? This is 2018 here, everyone is famous forever thanks to social media. I mean come on, Farrah Abraham is still famous because reasons. But I can’t wait for the porno of this one – “Make America Horny Again”. Or I may offer my own suggestion – “Debbie Does The Deep State”. Thank you! And we’ll get to Michael Cohen in a minute but even he’s feeling the effect of Stormy. Not in that way, sir!

Porn star Stormy Daniels turned a hotly anticipated court appearance by President Trump’s personal lawyer Michael Cohen into a three-ring circus on Monday, creating a media frenzy when she rolled up to the hallowed hall of justice in black stiletto heels.

Meanwhile, inside the Manhattan federal courthouse, the Cohen case took another twist when a mystery client of his was revealed to be Fox News Channel personality Sean Hannity.

Cohen had been ordered to appear in court after his own lawyers last week struggled to explain why records obtained in government raids on his office, home and hotel room should be shielded by attorney-client privilege — repeatedly failing to name any of his clients apart from Trump.

But Daniels, best known before her claim of sleeping with Trump for such XXX movies as “Big Busted Goddesses of Las Vegas” and “The Witches of Breastwick,” easily upstaged the man-of-the-hour as she strutted through a throng of photographers and news cameras outside the Pearl Street courthouse.

Yeah great choice of music! Let’s get on the pony and ride! Whew!!!!! Is that really what we’ve reduced the presidency to – porn stars and golf? And come on, how can Trump be secluded? He’s still got his unsecured Android phone with him! Is this a polar vortex or a porno vortex? Hey o!!!

In the land of hanging chads and where the Cash Me Outside girl is a local celebrity, of course, a porn star and self-proclaimed former mistress of the president of the United States wouldn’t miss the opportunity for a drive-by burlesque show.

That it was within spitting distance of the Winter White House at Mar-a-Lago and the golf course that bears Donald Trump’s name, made Stormy Daniels’ stop on her “Make America Horny Again” tour a perfect fit in the bizarre news that regularly emanates out of Palm Beach County.

And so, as President Trump addressed the nation on U.S. bombs dropping on Syria on Friday, Stormy — her given name Stephanie Clifford — a few hours later solicited patrons at Ultra Gentlemen’s Club to slap dollars on her oiled-up body.

Well, among other things there is that. You know what? Can I hear some more Pony? Yeah that’s my shit! And by the way if you’re in Miami and you’re thinking of going to see Make America Horny Again, and why wouldn’t you? My advice would be to get there early, I bet Stormy has some good opening acts!

The porn star who claims to have had sexual relations with President Donald Trump is just hours away from taking center stage at at Ultra Gentlemen’s Club in suburban West Palm Beach.

This stage is where controversial adult entertainer and porn star Stormy Daniels is set to perform, just a few miles away from Mar-a-Lago and Trump International Golf Club.

The club’s general manager says Daniels’ show is expected to attract 1,200 people during her four performances Friday and Saturday night.

The 39-year-old last performed in West Palm Beach in 2006, the same year she claims she had a one-night affair with the President.

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[font size="8"]Michael Cohen
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When your attorney is a crook, how are you going to get out of this mess? I mean you know your situation is fucked when your attorneys have their own attorneys. Last week I called this phenomenon “attorney-ception”. It’s a trial within a trial within a trial. Well this week the concept of that was taken to insane new levels.

Michael Cohen, longtime personal attorney for President Donald Trump, on Monday showed up at U.S. District Court in lower Manhattan after skipping an initial Friday hearing.

Cohen is asking Judge Kimba Wood to bar prosecutors from getting the first look at client files seized from him by the FBI last week. A lawyer for the president, Joanna Hendon, on Sunday filed a motion asking the judge to grant the president the privilege of reviewing the documents first.

The hearings follow the April 9 raids, in which federal agents seized materials from Cohen's office, home, hotel room and electronic devices.

Both Cohen and Trump argue that they should be allowed to decide which of the documents should be permanently withheld because they are protected by attorney-client privilege.

U.S. attorneys pushed back against Cohen's request in a filing Friday, saying that "Cohen is in fact performing little to no legal work," and alleging that "zero" emails were exchanged between Cohen and Trump. Their assessment was based on already conducted searches of Cohen's email accounts which had not been reported before the court filing.

Seriously! Now Trump’s lawyers are appearing with Trump’s porn stars! I mean is there anyone who they aren’t in bed with? Both literally and figuratively? Oh but here’s my favorite part – he’s complaining about privacy! Cue the world’s tiniest violin!

President Trump’s personal lawyer said he is worried about the confidentiality of roughly three clients since he branched off from the Trump Organization in 2017 — including the president and beleaguered RNC fundraiser Elliott Broidy.

Michael Cohen, who is under investigation by Manhattan federal prosecutors and the FBI, made the disclosures in a filing Monday morning as part of his bid to block the feds from reviewing documents that might be protected by attorney-client privilege.

On Friday, Broidy, a Trump fundraiser, stepped down from his Republican National Committee post after he admitted that Cohen arranged $1.6 million in hush money to a former Playboy model whom the donor had impregnated.

“It is unfortunate that this personal matter between two consenting adults is the subject of national discussion just because of Michael Cohen’s involvement,” Broidy said in a statement.

Cohen declined to name the third client, saying that person has requested his name not be made public.

Dude, seriously, Mr. Cohen, you work for the Donald Trump administration. Your privacy rights went bye bye when you signed up! But this week Cohen named 2 of his 3 ultra-prestigious clients – Donald J. Trump and GOP fundraiser Elliot Brody. Can anyone guess who the third is? Anyone? Well here’s who is behind door #3!

The legal battle over federal investigators' raids on President Donald Trump's personal lawyer Michael Cohen took an unexpected turn Monday as an attorney identified Fox News host Sean Hannity as one of Cohen's legal clients.

Cohen's attorneys had acknowledged publicly that he represented Trump and former Republican National Committee deputy finance chair Elliott Broidy in legal matters, but they had sought to avoid naming a third client. Under direct orders from a judge, Cohen's attorney Stephen Ryan named Hannity as the client in court on Monday.

The revelation came amid an extraordinary showdown between a sitting president and his own Justice Department over access to files seized in the raids on Cohen's home and office last week and over whether the materials are protected by attorney-client privilege. Hannity's connection to Cohen was revealed after the conservative commentator — one of Trump's staunchest defenders — fiercely criticized federal officials for the raids, without disclosing his own connection.

Even before the surprise disclosure about Hannity, the afternoon hearing before U.S. District Court Judge Kimba Wood was a spectacle. Cohen came under scrutiny after he acknowledged paying $130,000 to porn actress Stormy Daniels shortly before the 2016 election so she would keep quiet about an alleged sexual encounter with Trump. The Wall Street Journal reported last week that Cohen also negotiated a deal in 2017 to pay $1.6 million to a woman who said Broidy impregnated her.

Come on, even Larry David is playing you off, Sean! And yeah sure you can define “representation” all you want because that’s what the GOP does – they just make shit up as they go along! But hey I’m at least surprised that you found a real estate attorney who’s willing to give you advice for $10. That’s a bargain!

Sean Hannity used his radio program to deliver his first personal statement after being outed as the mysterious client Michael Cohen legally advised in 2017.

Cohen was trying to keep Hannity’s name off of public record during his court hearing today, but he was forced to identify his third client after the judge told him there wasn’t sufficient legal ground for the patron to retain his anonymity. When reporters reached out to Hannity before the start of his radio show, his initial response was “We have been friends a long time. I have sought legal advice from Michael.”

On Hannity’s radio show, he remarked how “very strange” it was to see the coverage from Fox News in light of the bombshell about their own anchor.

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[font size="8"]Facebook
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Another thing that happened if you’re living under a rock – or hiding under a rock – is that Mark Zuckerberg went to Washington last week to testify about Facebook’s increasingly shady business practices. And well, he was met with less than appealing enthusiasm, and shocker – most of the insanity was coming from the right!

Facebook chief executive Mark Zuckerberg took nearly 600 questions on Capitol Hill, giving a rare window into his views on some of the thorniest issues online.

What kinds of data does Facebook collect about its users? Who owns that data? What does Facebook do with it? And how does Facebook keep it safe and private?

Testifying about these issues in the Senate on April 10 and the House on April 11, Zuckerberg chose his words carefully, dodged or referred questions to his “team,” or gave only partial answers. The responses he did give were in some cases misleading because they lacked relevant information that could cast Facebook in an unflattering light.

We found some of the missing links. For this roundup, as is our custom, we won’t be awarding Pinocchios.

Yeah so Facebook you’ve got some ‘splainin to do! Especially you, Mark! Look at me! Ok, tell us what did Facebook do with all that data it collected? What are they using it for?

Facebook’s chief executive will confess that the company did not do enough to stop its tools for being used for harm, as he prepares to answer hard questions in his first ever appearance before Congress this week.

Mark Zuckerberg will say that advertisers and developers will never take priority over Facebook’s mission of “connecting people” as long as he is in charge of the social network, according to prepared testimony published by the House commerce committee.

The Facebook founder will say it made “mistakes” that allowed the leak of data of up to 87m users to Cambridge Analytica, the data analytics firm that worked for the Trump campaign. He will list the series of changes Facebook has made in the last three weeks since the revelations but admit there is “more to do”.

Mr Zuckerberg will also address concerns about Russian election interference on the platform. “We were too slow to spot and respond to Russian interference, and we’re working hard to get better,” he will say, adding that Facebook is working with the US government to understand the full extent of Russian influence in the 2016 election, while also trying to protect the integrity of elections around the world.

Are you fucking kidding me? A mistake? No! saying 2+2=5 is a mistake! Butt dialing your ex girlfriend is a mistake! Dropping an obvious fly ball during a tie game in the 9th inning is a mistake! This is a colossal fuckup that affects the whole damn planet! Well as if things weren’t going south enough already, it’s about to get worse. So much worse. Especially when Mr. Machine Gun Bacon gets involved.

But it turned out that all Cruz wanted to do was grind an old axe: his belief that Facebook has demonstrated a “pervasive pattern of political bias” in its monitoring and regulation of the content shared to its platform. He proceeded to rattle off a laundry list of examples: A “Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day” page that was banned in 2012, around the time that a number of Americans were protesting the fast-food chain after its chief operating officer made comments against same-sex marriage. Palmer Luckey, the virtual reality prodigy who parted ways with Facebooks after it was reported that he backed a pro-Trump conservative group that trafficked in anti-Hillary Clinton content. Diamond and Silk, the outspoken Trump fangirls who were reportedly told by Facebook this month that their “content and brand” were “unsafe to the community.”

“There are a great many Americans who I would say are deeply concerned that Facebook and other tech companies are engaged in a pervasive pattern of bias and political censorship,” Cruz said.

Zuckerberg conceded that Silicon Valley is “an extremely left-leaning place,” but denied Cruz’s insinuation that the bias had infiltrated the machinations of Facebook. When Cruz asked Zuckerberg if any members of the Facebook team tasked with monitoring users’ content had ever supported Republican political candidates, Zuckerberg said that he did not know.

Yeah really, all Ted Cruz seemed to care about was whether or not Trump fans Diamond & Silk were blocked from Facebook because they’re Trump supporters. Nah, Teddy, don’t you read the 100 page terms of service agreement when you signed up? No one does because that thing is the length of War & Peace, but Facebook can delete accounts at any time for any reason. But then there was this:

But according to Monday’s filing, Zuckerberg repeatedly admitted in his testimony that the Menlo Park, California-based company is “responsible for the content” on its platforms.

The filing also quoted Zuckerberg’s testimony that Facebook had a responsibility to ensure that its tools were “used for good,” and that “terrorist propaganda” qualified as “clearly bad activity” that should be reduced.

“What emerges from Zuckerberg’s testimony is a picture differing markedly from the one painted before the district court,” the filing said. “It is not simply a ‘hands off’ publisher of other people’s content.”

The plaintiffs are seeking a “summary” order voiding Garaufis’ dismissal immediately, and returning the case to him.

Facebook told Garaufis that content it hosts “is organic, and that Facebook is not responsible for it,” Robert Tolchin, a lawyer for the plaintiffs, said in a statement. “Confronted with overwhelming evidence and public pressure Zuckerberg has now been forced to admit what we have alleged all along.”

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[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Last Minute Taxes
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Ed. Note: The original piece we had planned on low cost airlines has been postponed due to the Southwest incident. It will show up on a future edition. Now back to our regularly scheduled program!

It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is:

Taxes. You can get your taxes in two flavors. If you are expecting a handsome refund, you’re probably looking forward to all the new things you can buy, until your precious refund money runs out. But now this week, there are millions of do it yourself taxers who are scrambling to get theirs done before the midnight deadline on April 17th. So what happens if millions of Americans file their taxes all at once?

(Update: Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin told the Associated Press late Tuesday that online tax filers would get an extension from the IRS. Click here for details.)

Hours before the midnight Tax Day deadline, the IRS page for paying your tax bill using your bank account crashed.

The IRS "Direct Pay" page allows filers to transfer funds from their checking or savings account to pay what they owe. As of 4 p.m. ET on April 17 — Tax Day — the page was unavailable.

Direct Pay is a free service.

The "Payment Plan" page, where filers can pay their tax bill in installments also appears to have crashed.

Taxpayers tweeted their frustration on Tuesday morning.

That’s right – if I can’t hear you, it’s not illegal. So what happens then if you can’t get through to the servers? Well, unlike trying to buy concert tickets, you’re not shit out of luck. So with that out of the way, who is really benefitting from taxes? Well it’s not you!

Tuesday at midnight is the deadline for millions of Americans to file their taxes for 2017, the last year before sweeping changes to the U.S. tax code went into effect in January. So while American taxpayers are seeing news reports of better than expected earnings for big banks, thanks in part to lower corporate tax rates, most won’t see a tax cut of their own until they file their 2018 taxes in a year.

President Donald Trump signed the $1.5 trillion tax cut, the largest reorganization of the tax code in a generation, into law on December 22, 2017. The law gave tax breaks to individual and joint filers, including lower rates and a larger standard deduction, and also slashed the top corporate tax rate from 35 to 21 percent. Those new rates went into effect on January 1, 2018.

That change gives corporations, which typically pay their taxes every quarter, a more immediate indication of the tax law’s benefit than individual and joint filers, who usually pay their taxes at the end of the year. Both corporations and individuals are operating under the new tax regime in 2018, but the differences typical filing schedules make corporate benefits apparently early. (Some individuals, most notably freelancers who don’t receive W2s from an employer, also file quarterly.)

No, Homer, we’re not sure why we would need to deduct gambling losses in order to purchase a cheeseburger. Just remember that while you may be enjoying your refund money – your boss probably had to pay $0. But yes – even he filed for a tax extension. You know – the guy who so far has refused to disclose his tax and financial statements.

It’s true, many Americans do procrastinate on their taxes and file for an extension: FiveThirtyEight reported that about 13 million Americans asked for an extra six months to complete their tax forms in 2015. However, for what it’s worth, it appears President Obama was pretty good about filing his taxes by the April deadline.

Of course, there might be a few reasons Trump is late like so many of us. His business — which he has not fully divested from and which is the subject of an ongoing lawsuit from the state of Maryland and Washington, DC — is complicated, after all.

Maybe this will be the year that Trump finally releases his tax returns for the American people to see, as he neglected to do during the 2016 presidential campaign, and he wants to make sure they’re right.

Or, my favorite theory: This is a covert way to draw more attention to the Republican tax bill. The New York Times reported this week that “no one’s talking about the new tax law,” given the way news coverage has fallen off since the bill passed and Republicans have struggled to turn it into an effective campaign message.

So the guy who we currently call “president” has yet to release what he is currently worth on his tax returns. But who’s complaining about high taxes? What you need to know about who really is complaining:

On Capitol Hill, CNBC broadcast interviews with Republicans and Democrats live on scene. Republicans in the House also set up studios on Capitol Hill for camera crews behind a "House Republicans" backdrop, which they typically reserve for major events like the president's annual State of the Union address.

In addition to the TV hits, Republican released a slew of prepared media touting changes from the law, known as the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act, or TCJA.

"On Tuesday, April 17, we Americans file our taxes — for the last time — under the old, broken tax code," wrote Republican Rep. and chief tax writer Kevin Brady in an op-ed for USA Today. "Yes, for the last time. Goodbye and good riddance to that outdated, monstrosity of a tax code that took too much of your money, sent our American jobs overseas, and kept our economy so slow many workers didn't see a pay raise for a decade or more."

President Donald Trump wrote an op-ed of his own that claimed the tax law was driving economic growth.

He has the best taxes, folks. Nobody has better taxes than he does. But no one does it better last minute than those who live in the US. After all, procrastination is what makes us #1! USA! USA! USA! So why are taxes such a big deal? Look at this from the 1930s and 1940s.

Before tax preparation software guided Americans through the process of filing tax returns before the Tax Day deadline — which falls on April 17 in 2018, though Tax Day is usually but not always April 15 — there were quacks like Donald Duck.

During World War II, the federal government needed an easily recognizable face to explain a process that was unrecognizable to many Americans at the time. As TIME previously reported, while the modern income tax was introduced in 1913, only the richest Americans paid it in the early years. That changed with the attack on Pearl Harbor, which prompted Congress to pass a new Revenue Act in 1942 to fund the U.S. war effort. The number of tax returns filed skyrocketed from 7.7 million in 1939 to 36.7 million in 1942, and about 50 million in 1945, according to the Tax Foundation, a tax-policy think tank.

So Treasury Secretary Henry Morgenthau tapped Walt Disney — who was already heavily involved in making films to boost the war effort — to crash-produce The New Spirit, a motivational film explaining income taxes to Americans in 1942.

That’s right – Disney is the key to the economy! There you have it folks. That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

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[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Gather around my fair brothers and sisters! It’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it’s time to remind you why the holiest among us are also the most full of:

So, my fair congregation – do DAYMONS exist? That is the question I have on the table for you this week, and one you should ponder long after you leave my church this week. And by the way how great is the Top 10 Gospel Choir? Give it up for them! Do DAYMONS exist? And in what capacity could they do some major damage to one’s soul? Well brother Alex has a theory about that!

Alex Jones, the conspiracy theorist who publishes Infowars, claims that he never knowingly spreads false information. Last night, he told listeners that when he was a teenager he used to be courted by attractive women who attempted to convert him to Satanism and prevent him from starting Infowars.

During Infowars’ latest ongoing “emergency” live-stream marathon session, Jones claimed that attractive young women at his high school would pretend to want to date him in order to try to convince him to join a satanic cult. Jones claimed this happened multiple times.

“Every time I thought some hot 17-year-old, when I was like 13 or 14, really wanted to date me and I’d drive out to some big old mansion of theirs—and I mean real mansions, helicopter pads, private landing fields, you name it—God almighty, after the third or fourth time I had been with them, they’d tell me, ‘By the way, we worship this god and we want you to come to this event, we want you to engage in this activity because Lucifer is really God,’” Jones said.

He added, “They knew inter-dimensionally because believe me, they weren’t trying to get the average person to go do that. Everybody thought like, ‘Why are you dating the head cheerleader or the head senior when you’re a freshman in high school?’ Well, because she was driving me out there in her $100,000 Mercedes and that was 30-something years ago, driving me out there in her $100,000 Mercedes that’d be a $300,000 Maybach today, to try to get me into the cult.”

Brother Alex, what brand of covfefe are you smoking this week? Because it must be too much, or not enough, I don't know how that shit works! Because using it is a SIN!!!! And it is the most egregious of SINS!!!! And you must be cleansed of this wicked sin!!! And I can point to where it says in the good book. But let’s ask Sister Liz if DAYMONS exist!

Fringe right-wing conspiracy theorist Liz Crokin posted a video on YouTube last night in which she declared that a gruesome video showing Hillary Clinton cutting the face off of a living child exists and will soon be released for all the world to see.

“I know with absolute certainty that there is a tape that exists that involves Hillary Clinton sexually abusing a child,” Crokin said. “I have gotten this confirmed from very respectable and high-level sources.”

Crokin said that reports that Russian-linked accounts posted a fake Clinton sex tape during the 2016 election are false, saying that no such fake video exists and that the stories about it are simply an effort to confuse the public “so when and if the actual video of Hillary Clinton sexually abusing a child comes out, the seeds of doubt are already planted in people’s heads.”

“All I know is that, one hundred percent, a video of Hillary Clinton sexually abusing a child exists,” she said. “I know there’s many videos incriminating her, I just don’t know which one they are going to release. But there are people, there are claims that this sexual abuse video is on the dark web and I know that some people have seen it, some in law enforcement, the NYPD law enforcement, some NYPD officers have seen it and it made them sick, it made them cry, it made them vomit, some of them had to seek psychological counseling after this.”

“I’m not going to go into too much detail because it’s so disgusting, but in this video, they cut off a child’s face as the child is alive,” Crokin claimed. “I’m just going to leave it at that.”

Holy shit!!!! You know a good rule for my fair congregation is never fall asleep while you’re watching reruns of Dexter. Because these are the kind of fucked up fantasies you will wake up with the next day! I mean because that is a SIN!!!! Can I get an amen??? But apparently an election of the wrong party will not only unleash demons, it will cast an hour of darkness upon us! Great Evil Dead sequel, by the way!

Right-wing preacher Lance Wallnau participated in another Truth & Liberty Coalition livestream event last night, where he warned that if Democrats gain control of Congress in the midterm elections, it will “inaugurate an hour of darkness” in America.

Wallnau said that he is working to help conservative Christian voters connect locally so that they can “pray together and begin to exercise spiritual authority for God to show up” in their local elections.

“This president, if he is in any way made vulnerable in the House or in the Senate,” he said, “the combined power of business, academia, media, entertainment, and government and funding is going to impeach this man and undo everything that he has done. And when that happens, it’s going to inaugurate an hour of darkness that God did not want over America. He wanted restoration and reformation, He didn’t want just a window of grace and then annihilation.”

YES!!!!!!!!!!!!! Even the LAWRD himself thinks this is ridiculous!!! But DAYMONS apparently also exist within our own education system! Just ask the “Activist Mommy”!

Elizabeth Johnston, a right-wing activist better known as “The Activist Mommy,” appeared on the “Focal Point” radio program yesterday to discuss the “Sex Ed Sit Out” effort she is leading, which encourages parents to remove their children from school for a day later this month to protest what she sees as “graphic, gender-bending sex education.”

Johnston told guest host Matt Barber that after this “Sex Ed Sit Out” effort is complete, she is going to turn her attention to suing school systems that promote “obscenity” by teaching sex ed to students.

“What they are teaching in the schools is obscenity, and we have good obscenity laws in this country, we just don’t have leadership enforcing those obscenity laws,” she said. “And you know what? It’s time that we hold leadership accountable. It’s time that we make sure that obscenity laws are enforced and so I feel like—Sex Ed Sit Out, that is going to be, after we get through this event on the 23rd—that is going to be an area that we move into very naturally.”

So DAYMONS exist in our schools, in our politics, and everywhere on this planet we live on. And they all must be cleansed of sin!!!! But apparently we are the DAYMONS folks, because according to Brother Larry, we are going to cut their heads off when we win!

Over the weekend, right-wing attorney and crackpot conspiracy theorist Larry Klayman joined right-wing birther conspiracy theorist Joel Gilbert on Infowars, where Klayman warned that liberals cannot be allowed to remove President Trump from office because that will eventually lead to liberals literally beheading conservatives.

“They’re trying to seize control of the country,” Klayman said. “Once they get ahold of it, they’re going to build it up in their socialist/communist/atheist radical anti-American image.”

“They want a socialist state, they want a police state, they want to squeeze God out of this country,” he added. “We are fighting a war, in effect, to the death. Our lives are at stake. All of our lives are at stake and they’re not going to stop with just getting rid of Trump. Once they get rid of him, they’re coming at us, the conservatives, the libertarians, those that will not go along with their socialist radical views.”

There you have it!!! That’s where DAYMONS exist! We are the DAYMONS!! I hope that is the take away you get from today’s sermon. Mass has ended, may you go in peace. That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Phil Anschutz
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It’s now time for:

This week we’re going to Coachella everybody!!! Well, sort of. Actually we’re going to talk about the owner of Coachella, right wing billionaire Phil Anschutz. If you don’t know who he is, he owns Anschutz Entertainment Group (AEG) – a company that is very slowly taking over the entire entertainment industry from the way we purchase tickets to actually owning the venues we go to. While we’re paying attention to the Kochs and the Mercers for the havoc they have wrought on this country, Phil Anschutz is the Jared Kushner of billionaires – he just sits in the corner, plotting his next evil move. Like a character in a horror movie. Only this is much more terrifying!

This weekend, hordes of music lovers and teepee enthusiasts will descend on Indio, California, for the annual Coachella Music Festival. The first big festival of the season, Coachella has a reputation for attracting the worst of the worst: entitled rich kids in knockoff Native headdresses, bankers in bindis, and these people. Think Fyre Festival, but financially solvent.

A few years ago, The Washington Post revealed that the often-problematic festival’s issues went way beyond appropriative accessories. A 2016 report on America’s “enemies of equality” is often cited as blowing the lid off Coachella and its founder, Philip Anschutz, the owner of entertainment conglomerate AEG. The Freedom for All Americans campaign reported that Anschutz, one of the richest people in America with a net worth of $12.9 billion, gave large sums of money to the Alliance Defending Freedom, the National Christian Foundation, and the Family Research Council.

According to the Post, the National Christian Foundation “funds a lot of the groups aggressively working to chip away at the equal rights of LGBT Americans.” The Family Research Council, which expressly says on its website that it “believes that homosexual conduct is harmful to the persons who engage in it and to society at large,” has been deemed an “extremist group” by the Southern Poverty Law Center.

So that $475 you shilled out for your 3 day Coachella pass? Yeah it’s going to fund the exact opposite of everything the festival originally stood for! Yeah so never mind that Beyonce and Jay Z have a 1,000,000 person entourage, your money is going to fund Anschutz and his causes like destroying LGBT civil liberties!

You'd be hard pressed to find a more anti-freedom lobby than the ADF. The organization is suspected to be behind seventeen proposals in fourteen states that directly target LGBT rights – a repressive political wave following the legalization of gay marriage in June 2015.

The ADF is also behind this charming little legal guide to helping churches shield themselves from the message of pro-sexual freedom that is apparently "spreading like a virus" in American churches.

Philip Anschutz, the 39th richest man in the United States, contributed nearly 110,000 dollars to the ADF between 2011 and 2013, and 80,000 dollars to a variety of other anti-LGBT organizations.

In a press release, Ian Silverii, director of ProgressNow Colorado, directly accuses these groups of advocating violence toward LGBT folks, as is the case of the extremist hate group Pray in Jesus Name.

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! That’s right – money from your Coachella ticket goes to anti-LGBT hate groups like Focus On The Family. Oh and if you think that’s not the worst thing he’s done lately, our buddy Phil seems bent on shutting down America’s local newspapers.

After the Denver Post announced that it would be laying off thirty people, or around 30 percent of the newsroom staff, the Denver Newspaper Guild, which represents 25 of those getting pink slips, put out an open call for a wealthy benefactor to buy the publication from Alden Global Capital, the hedge fund that's been stripping it down like a stolen car for years. Billionaire Phil Anschutz seems to fit this bill, and he has a notable interest in newspapers, having purchased the Colorado Springs Gazette in 2012.

But a story shared by Denver City Councilman Kevin Flynn suggests that Anschutz may prefer to let the Post die in order to replace it with a resurrected version of the Rocky Mountain News, which was shuttered in February 2009.

According to Flynn, Anschutz's right-hand man, the late Jim Monaghan, told him his boss simply wouldn't buy the Post because "he doesn't want to inherit the contracts." In other words, closing the Post would end the union contracts there, after which Anschutz could launch the Rocky as a non-union shop, like the Gazette.

And the Denver Post is just one paper! I mean we all know what they did last week when they mistook Coors Field for Citizens Bank Park in Philadelphia – a pretty obvious mistake to make except for the fact that it clearly says “Phillies” if you look closely enough:


And that’s just one newspaper! But there’s a method to Anschutz’ insanity. It seems for every evil thing he does, he does one thing that kind of makes it better… ish?

Billionaire businessman Philip Anschutz, the entertainment conglomerate chairman known for bankrolling controversial right-wing causes, donated $1 million to Elton John AIDS Foundation’s LGBT Fund earlier this week, according to a press release.

The fund “tackles the stigma, discrimination and violence that prevents LGBT people in Sub-Saharan Africa from accessing the health and HIV services they need.”

"My gift to the Elton John Foundation is intended to emphasize that we support freedom of all people to live their lives peacefully, without interference from others," Anschutz said in a statement provided to Billboard.

Except Mr. Anschutz is out to channel Scrooge McDuck – like most right wing billionaires do. And $1 million? Come on, Phil’s probably got that much in his couch cushions. But if you want any more insight into this 78 year old Christian conservative, here’s more.

Not that just anyone with a fat billfold can sign up. Weiss stresses that "we won't go forward unless we get significant support from people in Denver. And we don't want a person with a present agenda to be advocating to control the newspaper" — a description that some might see fitting billionaire Phil Anschutz, the Christian conservative marijuana hater who owns the Colorado Springs Gazette . Anschutz has long been rumored to have an interest in owning a Denver daily, but comments by his former right-hand man shared with Denver City Council member Kevin Flynn suggest that he would prefer to buy the Post when it hits bottom, shut it down and use its assets to revive the defunct Rocky Mountain News as a non-union paper.

Since the New York Times piece appeared, Weiss says, "We have been inundated with calls from people who have deep pockets" who aren't looking at buying the Post as a way to simply turn a quick buck.

"This is going to take patient capital," he allows. "We expect that whoever buys the paper will have to make strategic long-term investments that will pay off handsomely, but not in six months or a year or even two years. But they'll pay off eventually, and Colorado will have a great newspaper."

Never mind that Phil funds anti-marijuana causes *AND* owns the world’s largest music festival where there was a fucking marijuana bar present! That’s Phil Anschutz – this week’s:

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[font size="8"]The Alt Right
[br] [/font]

So the Alt Right, or Alt Lite, or New Right, or Diet Alt Lite, or Diet Reduced Calorie Sugar Free Alt Lite (now with 50% less high fructose corn syrup), or whatever these morons are called this week, have been having a banner week. Last week we talked about how Alex Jones has been in a huge free fall with that insane press conference, and this week, he had what might be one of his most insane revelations yet. So Alex claims that women were trying to seduce him to Satanism. Well, I always figured because he regularly channels the devil. Thank you! And then Alex further went insane by saying this:

Alex Jones, a conspiracy theorist who has spent the last week using his network to promote the idea that a deadly gas attack in Syria was a “false flag” designed to justify the military involvement of other countries in the region, screamed a slew of profanity aimed at President Trump before breaking down in tears in response to Trump’s announcement that U.S. would carry out airstrikes in response to the gas attack.

On Friday night, Trump announced that the United States military had bombed targets in Syria in retaliation for a chemical gas attack that had been carried out on April 7. Many world leaders believe that the Assad regime in Syria conducted the attack, pointing to reports that the chemical nerve agent sarin was used as it was in a similar attack last year. In response, Trump ordered the military to bomb three of the Syrian government’s chemical weapons facilities.

When news broke of Trump’s announcement about striking Syria, Jones and co-host Owen Shroyer took to the air to report live on the attacks, during which Jones briefly became a sobbing mess.

“I feel like I just had my best girlfriend break up with me and the left will make jokes but this ain’t funny, man,” Jones said, his voice trembling.

Oh come on Alex, you voted for a con artist! Don’t be surprised when you get conned! Yeah exactly thank you sir! It’s the art of the deal, folks, ok? If that’s not enough our favorite wannabe tough guys the Proud Boys are back! And like the Dropkick Murphys song says, they are looking for trouble!

The Proud Boys, a truly bizarre “western chauvinist” fraternity that was recently named a hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center, is hosting a Patriots Day rally in Massachusetts headlined by three figures who inhabit the far reaches of right-wing politics.

According to a Facebook event created by the New England chapter of Proud Boys, the April 16 rally will feature alt-right icon Kyle “Based Stickman” Chapman, who was charged with assaulting counter-protesters at a rally in Berkeley last year, right-wing Senate candidate V.A. Shiva Ayyadurai, who has cozied up to alt-right activists, and YouTube pundit Carl “Sargon of Akkad” Benjamin, who calls himself “liberalist” despite offering himself as an ally to the fringes of the far-right.

The rally will be hosted by John Medlar, a “local free speech activist” who also organized a “free speech” rally at Boston Common last year shortly after a woman was murdered at the “Unite the Right” rally in Charlottesville, Virginia. The event page promises “music, rousing speeches, and open-mic free speech.”

Because if there’s one way to attract an audience, it’s on a Monday afternoon when most of the people you cater to are working the drive through at McDonalds, or at school accusing their political science teachers of too much liberal bias. In fact last year at the same rally, there were more counter protesters than actual protesters!

Last year’s rally at Boston Common ended early after it was overwhelmed by counter-protesters. Ayyadurai also spoke at that rally.

The Proud Boys and their founder, CRTV host Gavin McInnes, have a well-documented history of spreading hate and vitriol. Former Proud Boy Jason Kessler helped organized the “Unite the Right” rally, which several Proud Boys attended. McInnes has made a career out of peddling transphobic, misogynistic and anti-Muslim rhetoric—ideas that have taken hold with many members of his organization.

The group also has a history of violence at rallies, some of which may be motivated by the fact that the final “degree” of Proud Boys membership requires physically assaulting an anti-fascist “Antifa” protester.

True but back to Alex Jones for a minute – you know we’ve railed on his attempts to label mass shootings false flags. Well this week he got his ass handed to him!

Since the tragedy in Connecticut, Jones has doubled down on his claims about the shooting and Infowars continues to put forward “false flag” conspiracy theories after nearly every major mass tragedy.

The new suits come on the heels of a marathon of press events Jones hosted in Washington last week, at which he spoke about his fight against a separate lawsuit from a person he had claimed was responsible for the murder of a counter-protester at last year’s Unite the Right rally in Charlottesville.

The plaintiffs in the lawsuits filed late last night are being represented by Mark Bankston, who filed another recent suit against Jones seeking damages for a plaintiff who Infowars incorrectly identified as the Parkland shooter. The suit, Fontaine v. Jones, alleges that Infowars’ false reporting resulted in death threats for the incorrectly accused young man and seeks $1 million in damages.


But I can’t get out of here without mentioning how the right wing is reacting to their news about Sean Hannity this week.

News broke this afternoon that Fox News host Sean Hannity was the secret third client of Michael Cohen, the lawyer who allegedly arranged massive payouts to women who had affairs with President Trump and former RNC fundraiser Elliot Broidy. Hannity’s name surfaced in connection with Cohen’s challenge to the FBI’s seizure of records from his office based on assertions of the need to protect attorney client confidentiality.

The news came as a shock to many in the media, but Trump-supporting conspiracy theorists have already begun their work weaving the revelation into their ongoing conspiracy theory narrative alleging that the so-called “deep state” or “shadow government” is secretly working to undermine the Trump administration, its allies in the media, and conservative voters.

Last December, Hannity told former White House strategist and Breitbart executive Steve Bannon that he feared that he “may end up in jail” for defending Trump against a deep-state effort to remove Trump from office. “By the way, people like us may end up in jail,” he told Bannon. “Let me tell you. They will stop at nothing. This is what I’m trying to get across to people. This is serious. This is the rule of law in this country now.”

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[font size="8"]I Need A Drink
[br] [/font]

It’s now time for:

And man do I need a drink this week. And I definitely need a few drinks to get me through a Proud Boys rally. So tell me bartender, what goes well with Donkey Kong? A barrel of whisky thrown right at me? Eh, I think I’d rather have a double Jack & Coke, thanks. This week, a record was torn down just like the NCAA yanking it from Joe Paterno. What? Too soon? Well I’m talking about a documentary movie that was made a few years ago called “The King Of Kongs”. So what happened exactly?

Well, we’ve officially found our video-game version of Icarus. One of the highest-scoring gamers of all time, Billy Mitchell — who was propelled into geeky stardom thanks to the 2007 documentary King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters — has been stripped of all of his high scores due to substantial cheating evidence against him. Per Variety, Twin Galexies, which is the world’s largest tracker of video-game records, made the ruling after months of investigation. “With this ruling, Twin Galaxies can no longer recognize Billy Mitchell as the first million point Donkey Kong record holder,” the group said in a statement. “According to our findings, Steve Wiebe would be the official 1st million point record holder.” Because of the scandal, Mitchell has been banned from competitive gaming for the rest of his life, and Guinness Book of World Records has also been alerted.

Thank you sound effects guy! And no one beats that level, damn it! So how did Billy Mitchell get stripped of his title exactly?

Famed high-score gamer Billy Mitchell, best known for his role in “The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters” documentary, was officially stripped of his “Donkey Kong” and other video game high scores and banned from submitting scores to the world’s largest tracker of video game world records following a decision that he cheated, Twin Galaxies announced today.

“With this ruling, Twin Galaxies can no longer recognize Billy Mitchell as the first million point ‘Donkey Kong’ record holder,” the group wrote in its announcement. “According to our findings, Steve Wiebe would be the official 1st million point record holder.”

Variety has reached out to Mitchell and Wiebe for comment and Guinness to see if his record there will stand.

The decision comes after months of research by the administrators of Twin Galaxies, which tracks world gaming records and helps the Guinness Book of World records validate gaming scores, according to a statement released by the group Thursday morning.

Well on the plus side, I hear that Putin has a nice job for Mitchell in his hacker army. So Mitchell cheated! And of course there’s more to this story than you would believe. Wait – so who knew there was an official Donkey Kong forum?

The recent controversy began with a lengthy post on the Donkey Kong Forum from Jeremy Young, known on the site as Xelnia. Over the course of almost 2,000 words—complemented by multiple animated gifs—Young makes the case that Mitchell achieved three of his Donkey Kong high scores in emulated versions of the game rather than on original arcade cabinets. The evidence mostly comes down to subtle variations in the way that older emulators—like those that Mitchell would have used—render the environment on-screen. As Ars Technica explains, “While a real Donkey Kong cabinet generates and displays game scenes in a ‘sliding door’ effect, sliding from one side to the other, old versions of the Multiple Arcade Machine Emulator (MAME) instead build entire chunks of a level at once and then display them as a complete screen buffer.” That matters in part because it can change the way the game is played, while also making it easier to falsify the record.

In his post, Young stops short of suggesting that Mitchell actively cheated along the way to earning his high scores in the game, but with an emulator he easily could have. Young notes that using the emulator’s recording feature, Mitchell could have played in a stop-and-start style, allowing him to patch together a more ideal run. Further, there are no witnesses to the three scores in question (Mitchell submitted evidence by video tape), and he probably didn’t have the skills to create a recording from the hardware itself, which increases the likelihood that he used an emulator.

At least in drinking games the only way to cheat is if you spill or puke. And there isn’t any hacking into that shit either. Unless you know of some superhuman way to drink beer. But the cheating allegations against Mitchell aren’t just an isolated incident. Apparently there’s more!

In the wake of Young’s announcement, others have made additional accusations against Mitchell. As Ars Technica reports in an update to its original post, “Former Donkey Kong world record holder Wes Copeland has presented new statistical evidence that he says suggests Mitchell’s 1.05 million point game was patched together from multiple emulated plays.” Meanwhile, the site adds, another competitor managed to best his own previous No. 1 score in Donkey Kong, livestreaming a game in which he accumulated almost 200,000 more points than Mitchell had in the most impressive of his (allegedly fraudulent) runs.

Ultimately, Mitchell’s true gift to the competitive arcade community may have been the ease with which he filled the role of antagonist. In the years since King of Kong’s 2007 release, many other players have surpassed the accomplishments of Steve Wiebe, Mitchell’s good guy foil. While they may have paid prices of their own for their triumphs, it seems as if they’ve done so in a very different spirit, one that emphasizes mutual support as much as it does individual skill. From the outside, it’s hard to avoid the impression that they’ve come together in a spirit wholly contrary to the one Mitchell espouses in the film. Or, as Young puts it in the conclusion to his original post, theirs is a community “built on the idea of friendship through competition, camaraderie through our shared pains in pushing ourselves, our friends, and these games to their limits.”

So the moral of the story here is don’t cheat, kids! Unless you’re a republican or you’re working for Vladimir Putin, then it’s OK for you to cheat. So what does Billy Mitchel’s biggest rival, Steve Weibe think?

Steve Wiebe is speaking out as another record-keeping body has stripped away the accomplishments of his ‘The King Of Kong’ rival. On Thursday, video game legend Billy Mitchell was banned from competition and his records were wiped off the books after video game organization Twin Galaxies determined the proverbial villian of the 2007 documentary was cheating.

The two gamers battled to be the first to reach one million points in Donkey Kong, a feat Mitchell appeared to do first. But Thursday’s news changed all that. The accusations against Mitchell are a bit complicated, but it appears that his records were not set on a true arcade machine, using a MAME emulator rather than an arcade circuit board, thus making his achievements invalid.

Given the rivalry between the two competitors, it’s inevitable that Wiebe was reached to discuss what’s become of Mitchell and what he thought about the coda to their battles documented in the film.

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[font size="8"]Stupidest State Contest: Round 1 Week 4
[br] [/font]

16 states will enter, but only one will be crowned the new Top 10 Conservative Idiots Stupidest State!

Welcome back! I hope you all filled out your brackets! Round 1 of the tournament is over and man there have been some exciting developments. Last week – Missouri routed Utah to advance to the Elite 8 in a Family Values faceoff, while Virginia stunned the world champion Texas team flinging the batshit in a massive upset. This week we’re live in San Jose at the home of the San Jose Sharks – HP Pavilion for the Gun Nut Conference Championship! The winner moves on to the Final Four. The loser goes home. This week it’s a duel to the death in the states that have the craziest gun laws in our country. In one corner is Florida, they have not disappointed this year. In the other corner – Montana, and they are proving every bit as formidable as they were last year. This is going to be an exciting matchup! Can they do it? Let’s get out our brackets so you can follow along!

[font size="6"]Gun Nut Conference Championship: Florida Vs Montana [/font]

[font size="4"]Florida[/font]

So the last time we checked in with Florida, they were still reeling from the Parkland tragedy but that has spawned a new movement. But unfortunately I know what state this is. This is Florida, the state that has given us Florida Man and his wife Florida Woman. The state where meth and bath salts are considered a balanced part of your daily diet. And a place where shooting first and asking questions later is the most effective means of communication. It’s also the last place where you can stuff a gun in your pants and people will consider it a fashion accessory. So what has Florida been up to?

The pro-Second Amendment right wing officially broke its brain last month. Instead of civilly disagreeing with the Parkland-surviving teens who organized the March for Our Lives, Breitbart has accused David Hogg of giving a Nazi salute (didn't happen), commentators and sitting lawmakers have utterly misrepresented Cuban politics and accused Emma Gonzalez of supporting the Castro regime, the Daily Wire wrote an article making fun of David Hogg's actually very-good 4.2 grade-point-average, and social-media users have spread all sorts of memes comparing school-shooting survivors to Hitler.

Did you assume that photoshopping Hogg's face onto the body of a Hitler Youth member was the lowest the public discourse about this could go? Think again! A burgeoning take on right-wing pockets of social media seems to be that the Parkland kids actually caused the Stoneman Douglas massacre by bullying poor, poor Nikolas Cruz.

To be clear: There's little evidence that Cruz was bullied. Douglas students have consistently described Cruz as a frightening individual that most people steered clear from, and he was evaluated multiple times for psychiatric issues and threats of violence.

And even if any students bullied someone, that doesn't give anyone the right to walk into a school with an assault rifle and murder people. The meme here seems to stem from one of Gonzalez's speeches, where she says she and others "ostracized" Cruz — but the clip is ripped out of context and she is very clearly explaining that Cruz's actions (threatening others, taking tons of photos of his guns, drawing swastikas on his belongings) terrified people and made them want to avoid him.

Read more: http://www.miaminewtimes.com/news/right-now-blaming-parkland-teens-for-bullying-nikolas-cruz-10221533

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Only in this country could you get shot at, and people would be blaming you for standing in the way of the bullet. It’s your own fault, damn it! But some good news is that Florida is at least taking *SOME* measures to prevent Florida Man from owning a gun.

In a truly surprising sequence of events, it took less than one month from the massacre at a Parkland high school for Florida lawmakers to take actual legislative action. March 9, Gov. Rick Scott signed a bill allowing law enforcement to petition the courts to take guns away from people thought to be a danger to themselves or others. It was the first firearm restrictions supported by Florida Republicans in more than 20 years.

Though the law is only three weeks old, court records show it's already having a real-world effect in South Florida. In Broward County, law enforcement has successfully petitioned the courts to take guns away from seven people, including a mentally ill man who kept a "diary of delusions," a teenager whose peers were concerned he could be the next school shooter, and a disgruntled employee who threatened to shoot up his office. (No cases have been filed so far in Miami-Dade, according to a judicial spokesperson.)

New Times reviewed five of the seven cases in Broward to learn more about how the new law works and who it targets. (Because the other two cases involved juveniles, the details of those petitions are not public record.) Those court records paint a disturbing picture of people who, until recently, were within their legal right to possess firearms.

Yes we need 8 paces, damn it! So Florida is on a right path, I guess? And only in America can we grieve in a mass shooting by comforting the gun owners.

WASHINGTON — The day after a shooter killed 17 people at a Florida high school, President Donald Trump offered comforting words — for gun owners.

"We are committed to working with state and local leaders to help secure our schools and tackle the difficult issue of mental health," Trump said in brief remarks at the White House. "It is not enough to simply take actions that make us feel like we are making a difference. We must actually make that difference."

Translation: Your guns are safe.

"That's very encouraging that he's not mounting up with the anti-Second Amendment posse," said Larry Pratt, executive director emeritus of the Gun Owners of America, an advocacy group based in Virginia. "The response from gun owners will be principally that he didn't say the kind of things Hillary Clinton would have said had she been president and the way Barack Obama reacted to other situations like this."


[font size="4"]Montana [/font]

Hey everybody give it up for last year’s conference champions! Montana pulled out no stops as it shot its’ way to the top – both literally and figuratively. If you think Florida’s got a lot of guns, Montana has the highest concentration of gun manufacturers in the entire United States. And that’s a fact, you can look it up on Google. And as we learned last year – Montana has a toxic mix of doomsday preppers, end of the world conspiracy theorists, and white supremacists. And of course with hardcore guns comes hardcore racism. Since we last saw Montana, Montana has elected Greg Gianforte as its’ only representative. But well so much for freedom of speech!

Students walk out: On Wednesday, hundreds of students in Missoula walked out of class to protest gun violence in schools. (Here are the photos.) “In my opinion it’s sad that it’s taken this long for people to get this upset about it,” said Henry Charman, a senior at Hellgate who helped to organize the walkout.

Carroll College students plan to walk out of their classes on March 14 to protest Congress’ inaction on gun violence. In 1990, a man who appeared to be drunk walked into Carroll College's cafeteria and opened fire, killing one food service worker and wounding another.

Threats against schools: A Darby senior was in court this week after telling fellow students he was "going to shoot up the school." MacLean William Kayser, 18, told classmates that those wearing yellow shirts to school the following day would be "a target'' but those in red shirts would be safe. He then pointed at various students, saying “you’re a red shirt” or “you’re a yellow shirt,” according to an affidavit of probable cause filed Tuesday in Ravalli County Justice Court.

On Thursday, Missoula's Big Sky High School was on lock-in after graffiti was found in a girls' bathroom that said "Don't be at Big Sky at 1:20." The school allowed parents to pick up teir kids.

Uh yeah that’s about it in America. You have a constitutional right to protest but then you get punished by exercising that right. I mean come on this is a state where they have rallies *FOR* the 2nd Amendment:

HELENA – Nearly 150 people gathered on the steps of the state Capitol on Saturday in a show of solidarity for the Second Amendment right to bear arms as rallies for an end to gun violence took place elsewhere in Montana.

“Today is a great day in Montana and we will be heard,” said Brent Webber, who organized the March for our Guns rally in response to the March for our Lives events held nationwide Saturday in observance of the Feb. 14 shooting at a high school in Parkland, Florida, that killed 17 people.

A couple miles away an anti-violence rally was held at Helena’s Memorial Park. Other Montana observances were also held in Great Falls, Missoula, Billings and Bozeman.

Webber said March for our Guns event was for every Montanan who did not have a voice in this debate through the media.


By the way – Montana needs no introduction as to why it’s one of the single most violent states in the country. I mean after all, this is the guy who they chose to represent them in the House Of Representatives:

US congressman Greg Gianforte misled police after his assault of Guardian reporter Ben Jacobs in May, falsely stating that Jacobs had initiated physical contact and that the “liberal media … is trying to make a story”, according to the police incident report.

The records, made public on Friday, provide new details on the violent altercation that occurred on the eve of a special election to fill Montana’s sole seat in the US House of Representatives. Jacobs had approached the then candidate at his Bozeman campaign headquarters to ask a question about the Republican healthcare bill when Gianforte threw him to the ground and punched him.

The Republican was nevertheless elected the next day.

Gianforte subsequently pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor assault charge and was sentenced to community service, anger management classes and a $385 fine in June.

read the entire article at:


[font size="4"]And the winner is… [/font]

Holy shit this was quite the exciting matchup here! Florida brought their A game against Montana and they are not going to disappoint! The game went into overtime, with Florida winning by the final score of 91 – 78. Montana is going home. Florida is the Gun Nut Conference champion! Cut the net guys, you earned it!

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

One conference championship down, 3 to go! Next week, we’re going across town to Oakland, California, at the home of the Golden State Warriors – Oracle Arena - for the Family Values Conference Championship! And it will be Alabama vs. Missouri – who will be the more godly state worthy of advancing to thine Final Four?

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]NOFX[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen, continuing our month long celebration of all things punk rock, my next guests are San Francisco legends! Their latest album is called “First Ditch Effort”. You can see them headlining Punk Rock Bowling on May 27th and they are bringing their “Punk In Drublic” beer and music festival to a city near you. Playing their song “Oxymoronic”, give it up for NOFX!

See you next week!


Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: City National Grove Of Anaheim, Anaheim, CA
Special Thanks To: City National Grove Management
Images: All images copyright belongs to respective copyright holders.
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NOFX Appear Courtesy Of: Fat Wreck Chords
Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

April 11, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-13: Lawyer-Ception: A Trial Within A Trial Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-13: Lawyer-Ception: A Trial Within A Trial Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! Sign up for the new Top 10 Visa Signature Card and get 15% cash back on all purchases and low APR financing, plus double airline miles! So I want to start by talking about professional golf. I usually don’t talk about professional golf. But I love this story. So the Masters tournament happened in Augusta, Georgia this weekend. I have no idea who won, I don’t really care. So the Budweiser commercial and their semi-annoying nonsense catch phrase “Dilly Dilly” got banned from the Masters tournament. Yes if you say “Dilly Dilly” during the tournament, you will get an ejection. Yes, as in an immediate, go directly to jail, do not pass go, do not collect $200 ejection. So the organizers of the Masters tournament handed down that moratorium. But the response from Anheuser-Busch was classic. Can we throw that tweet up there?


Bud Light even went so far as to have hats and t-shirts made, because apparently not having a “Dilly Dilly” presence at the Masters, made Bud Light really want to have a “Dilly Dilly” presence at the Masters. So hats and t-shirts were made and distributed for the prestigious event. But alas, guess what happened? That Dilly Dilly ban, as the guy who we currently call “president” says, fake news! yup – the whole thing was erroneously reported! Thank you sound effects guy! Man I never thought I would see the day when my sound effects guy was funnier than I am. OK enough of the intro – we have a lot of idiocy to get to. But first – John Oliver is back and he exposes the seedy underbelly behind faith-based “Crisis Pregnancy Centers”:


Taking the first slot is another edition of The Trumper Games! Happy Trumper Games! Yes – another tribute has been eliminated – Trump’s own lawyer Michael Cohen! In the second slot this week of course is Donald J. Trump (2) . So by now you know that Trump sent troops to the Mexican border, because, reasons. In the third slot this week is the Alt Right (3). Apparently they are ramping up their quest to out rampant satanic pedophilia, whatever that is. In the number 4 slot, is Gun Nut Apologists (4) who are ramping up their quest to harass and humiliate Parkland student David Hogg - to the point where they are flat out stalking him. In the #5 slot we’ve got a new installment of Top 10 Investigates, and this time we’re going to Los Angeles, and we’re going to investigate what is up with the Waze app. Yes – Waze apparently doesn’t know road conditions and it can get you in serious trouble. In the number 6 slot is our weekly sermon of all things holy, Holy Shit, and this week, our resident pastor is going to educate you on how to elect a “godly” candidate because , Jesus. In the number 7 slot we’ve got a new installment of “This Fucking Guy”, only this week, it’s “This Fucking Gal” and that is batshit crazy racist Infowars and Project Veritas contributor Laura Loomer (7), and whew, she crazy. And speaking of Infowars, it’s been a while since we checked in with our old buddy Alex Jones (8) and man is he losing it big time. In the number 9 (NEIN!!!) slot this week is a new installment of “People Are Dumb” because, well, people are dumb. Finally this week it’s Round 1 Week 4 of our Stupidest State contest and this time we’re live from the home of the Los Angeles Chargers at Stub Hub Center, and this time Virginia takes on the champs, Texas in a battle of the batshit, while newcomers Utah and Missouri duke it out for Family Values superiority! And to cap it off we’re beginning our month long celebration of all things punk rock, and we have a live performance for you from the legendary Suicidal Tendencies! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]The Trumper Games: Mockingtrump Pt. 2
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Another firing, another week for the Trumper Games! Wait a minute… you mean to tell me that Michael Cohen wasn’t fired? Charlie!!!! Get me my producer! And bring me the good champagne again, why must I keep getting the cheap shit? But this week – the president’s own lawyer – Michael Cohen – was eliminated from the contest known as the Trumper Games! And this was no ordinary arrest either – we’re talking about the presidents’ own attorney!

WASHINGTON — The F.B.I. raided the Rockefeller Center office and Park Avenue hotel room of President Trump’s longtime personal lawyer, Michael D. Cohen, on Monday morning, seizing business records, emails and documents related to several topics, including a payment to a pornographic film actress.

Mr. Trump, in an extraordinarily angry response, lashed out hours later at what a person briefed on the matter said was an investigation into possible bank fraud by Mr. Cohen. Mr. Trump accused his own Justice Department of perpetrating a “witch hunt” and asserted that the F.B.I. “broke in to” Mr. Cohen’s office.

The president, who spoke at the White House before meeting with senior military commanders about a potential missile strike on Syria, called the F.B.I. raid a “disgraceful situation” and an “attack on our country in a true sense.”

It is not clear how the F.B.I. entered Mr. Cohen’s office, but agents had a search warrant and typically would have presented it to office personnel to be let in. The documents identified in the warrant date back years, according to a person briefed on the search

Oh that’s fierce! But alas – who connected to the president isn’t a shady criminal? We honestly have no idea. So now Tribute Cohen – who was from the 7th district – has been eliminated. The president’s own lawyers have their own lawyers! It’s Lawyer-ception! It's a trial within a trial within a trial! Where does it end and where does it begin?

The FBI raid against Michael Cohen spiked President Donald Trump's rampant indignation over the Robert Mueller probe to previously unseen heights, multiplying the persecution complex he feels about the FBI and his own Justice Department and fueling his sense he's the target of a witch hunt.

And it suggests that Cohen, who paid off adult film star Stormy Daniels, could be a bridge between the two separate legal strands threatening Trump.

"There is no way that they are looking for things that don't connect to the President in some way," Anne Milgram, a former New Jersey attorney general told CNN's Anderson Cooper of the Cohen raid. "It really is an unbelievable day when you start to think about what is happening, what we are going to see next."

Trump's rage continued into Tuesday morning, when he tweeted that "Attorney--client privilege is dead!" and referred to a "A TOTAL WITCH HUNT!!!," his preferred moniker for Mueller's investigation.

So now the president’s lawyers have their own lawyers! Who probably also have their own lawyers – I mean who knows how many layers this thing has? What’s real and what isn’t? Even we don’t know! And of course the president is angry all right! I mean he had to remind us of what it’s all about.


Yes it’s a witch hunt! Or…. Is it? I mean if you were to ask the president directly it is an ordeal orchestrated by the other side! But in reality… he failed to read beyond the headline or the first paragraph like most fans of the president’s favorite news network.

The Department of Justice had to go to extraordinary lengths in order to carry out the raid on President Donald Trump's personal lawyer Michael Cohen.

And the lengths to which the Justice Department went show just how big of a deal the raid is, and, as experts said, how it is such "bad news" for Cohen.

On Monday, the FBI raided Cohen's Manhattan office, his home, and his hotel room, as The New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and Vanity Fair reported. The FBI was apparently acting on a referral from the special counsel Robert Mueller.

The agency took records related to several topics, including the $130,000 hush-money payment to adult-film star Stormy Daniels just before the 2016 presidential election, The Times reported. Federal prosecutors obtained a search warrant after Mueller sent a referral, said Cohen's lawyer, Stephen Ryan.

The Washington Post reported that Cohen was under investigation for possible bank fraud and violations of election law. Meanwhile, The Times wrote that the raid did not appear to be directly connected to Mueller's probe into Russian interference in the 2016 presidential election, but that the information he provided was likely uncovered as part of his investigation.

Yes… anything goes at this point, apparently! Mmmm… yes…. Mmmm…. Yes. Mmmmm… yes. So how does anything go? I mean how deep does this probe go? Not quite that deep, sir! We will keep an eye on this story, but for now, consider Tribute Cohen… eliminated!

Here’s what we don’t know: We don’t know specifically what the FBI was looking for when it raided the office of Michael Cohen, high-profile attorney for the Trump Organization. We don’t know what they found; we don’t know what investigations might be bolstered or curtailed by the evidence they seized.

What we do know, though, is interesting enough. The raid, which covered Cohen’s office and, according to the Wall Street Journal, his home and a Manhattan hotel room, included the seizure of information about the payment made to porn star Stormy Daniels shortly before the 2016 election and it included communications between Cohen and President Trump — meaning it included communication between an attorney and his client.

That last point also means that the bar for obtaining a warrant was higher than normal.

An attorney for Cohen told The Washington Post that the search was related to an investigation referred to the Justice Department by special counsel Robert S. Mueller III. In March, The Post reported that Cohen had caught Mueller’s eye, with the special counsel’s team questioning witnesses about Cohen’s actions and requesting documents from Trump’s attorney.

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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You know Trump loves him some walls, folks. And he’s so determined to build that damn wall that he will stop at nothing to get it. And you know what the fuck good is a wall going to do when you have these things called airplanes and boats? If he really wanted to be effective, he would build a dome over America. But as we know from the Simpsons Movie and the show Under The Dome, those scenarios tend to end pretty shitty. So here are the latest developments in Trump’s quest to wall off the United States:

The Pentagon offered new details Monday about the types of activities National Guard troops would perform while deployed by President Trump to the U.S.-Mexico border, but critical questions remain about how long the operation will last and how much it will cost.

National Guard troops will provide air support through drones and light-, medium- and heavy-lift helicopters, Lt. Col. Jamie Davis, a Defense Department spokesman, said in a statement to The Washington Post. They will also help maintain roads and other infrastructure, clear vegetation and assist with facility maintenance, in addition to operating surveillance systems, including cameras and blimps, Davis said.

They will not be arresting migrants or carrying out armed patrols along the border.

Describing the mission as a support role for the Department of Homeland Security, Davis confirmed that the troops won’t necessarily carry weapons. “National Guard personnel will only be armed for their own self-protection to the extent required by the circumstances of the mission they are performing,” Davis said.

Oh come on, this is the Trump administration here! You say facts like costs and deployment times as if they are a thing. You silly journalists, facts don’t matter! I mean if facts did matter Trump wouldn’t be in the White House! So Trump is sending troops to the border because, reasons. I mean if drugs are really the reason, the Trump administration can’t be bothered to do any actual research!

As for drug trafficking, the administration would be well-advised to take credit for collapsing marijuana smuggling, which is the real story. From a 2009 high of 3.8 million pounds confiscated by Border Patrol in the field (as opposed to at official crossing points), we anticipate seizures to fall to 0.6 million pounds this year, a reduction of 84 percent.

The key driver of the collapse is the legalization of recreational marijuana, at first in Colorado and more recently in California, which has allowed domestic production to displace Mexican imports. As the U.S. industry becomes more established, it will continue to take share from lower quality, smuggled product.

The anticipated legalization of marijuana in New Jersey will put another nail in the smuggling coffin, and we anticipate a further two-thirds drop of marijuana smuggling in the field by 2021. The collapse of marijuana smuggling has nothing to do with border patrol and everything to do with legalization at the state level. Nevertheless, in the time honored tradition, U.S. presidents can take credit for achievements on their watch. President Trump should do so.


Well it’s not wrong, it’s a fact, sir! But you know it is Trump – a guy whose media diet is almost as shitty as his actual diet. 2500 calories worth of McDonalds can’t be all that bad for you can it? And neither can a steady diet of 24/7 Fox News.

National Guard troops have begun deploying along the Mexican border, answering a call from President Trump to combat the "lawlessness that continues at our southern border."

Arizona Gov. Doug Ducey announced 225 guard members from his state deployed Monday, with more than 100 additional troops sent Tuesday.

"Thank you to the brave men and women of @AZNationalGuard deploying in support of Operation Guardian Shield," Ducey said on Twitter. "Your efforts are making all Arizonans and our country safer."

Texas Gov. Greg Abbott said about 250 Texas National Guard members have been deployed, a force that will be ramped up to about 1,000 from his state alone in coming weeks, he said.

And who needs to actually build a wall when you can just send a human one with drones overseeing your every move? Yes – they’re watching you! And the true worth of the border wall – it’s pretty worthless, actually.

President Donald Trump's plans to build a wall along the United States' southern border is inflaming relations between the United States and Mexico. It's a contentious issue, considering the border wall would cost billions of dollars.

On Thursday, Trump threatened to cancel a meeting with Mexican President Enrique Peña Nieto, after Peña Nieto reiterated that Mexico would not pay for it.

On Thursday, Senate leader Mitch McConnell, R-Ky, said Congress will follow through on Trump's border wall order, and McConnell estimated it will cost $15 billion at most — he cited a range of $12 billion to $15 billion.

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[font size="8"]The Alt Right
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So if you remember last week – we discussed in more detail that I would care to know about – a bullshit conspiracy theory called “The Storm”. And the storm alleges that there’s a global elite ring of rampant pedophilia and child sex trafficking that we are unaware of. Sure, these are truly horrifying crimes, but like most things, the Alt Right just makes shit up. Take Liz Crokin for instance who says that anyone who dares to criticize Trump is tied to Satanism! Oh sure that’s what we want you to think, Liz!

Fringe right-wing conspiracy theorist Liz Crokin appeared on the “Disputed Lands” program last night, where she asserted that the cabal of elite satanic pedophiles who rule the world are trying to kill everyone through vaccines and chemtrails so that they can sexually abuse and eat children without anyone “pestering” them.

“That’s why they are all about abortion, depopulation, contaminating our food supply, the chemtrails, the vaccines,” Crokin said. “They are trying to kill us. They are trying to kill us off because they know the only way they can run their sick one-world government where they worship Moloch, rape kids, and do it without anyone like me pestering them is if they kill most of us off and that’s what they’re trying to do.”

Crokin said that, in the meantime, “they are trying to hard to normalize this because they know eventually this is going to come out” and so they are working to “get raping kids and eating kids to be cool and normal” by using celebrities like Lady Gaga, Katy Perry and Drew Barrymore to promote “cannibalism and satanic rituals and child sex trafficking.”

Yeah probably. I want some of whatever brand of Covfefe these morons are smoking because it must be some pretty strong stuff. I mean Liz isn’t the only one who is convinced that there’s rampant satanic pedophilia out there. I give you Alex Jones’ BFF, Jerome Corsi.

Jerome Corsi, the Washington bureau chief for the right-wing conspiracy theory outlet Infowars, appeared on “The SGT Report” over the weekend to discuss his efforts to promote the QAnon/The Storm conspiracy theory, which alleges that President Trump is secretly working to take down a massive satanic pedophile ring that involves untold numbers of elite political, business and entertainment leaders.

Corsi said that it is only through the grace of God that he is able to maintain his sanity as he works tirelessly to expose the terrible truth about the rampant satanic pedophilia that is taking place and that he often finds himself unable to sleep over the thought that he may be missing an opportunity to get the word out and “red pill” one more person.

“The corruption, the evil of devoting yourself to Lucifer ends up in satanic sacrifices, children abused, human rights kidnapping, just incredible human torment, torture, snuff films,” Corsi said. “The evil depths and corners of this are so abhorrent to me, and should be to every right-thinking American, that we need to expose this, we need to bring it out, we need to show it the light of day despite how many people it’s going to be disturbing to.”

“Those of us who are going to know every aspect of it are ourselves going to have to pray to God that we come out not so damaged that we become somewhat dysfunctional,” he added. “We are going to have to make sure that we pray and approach this with the light of God and the help of God in order to get through this crisis.”

What crisis, Jerome? You mean the one where a puppet installed by a mass murdering dictator is occupying the government of the free world? That one? Yeah there’s that. These morons are so convinced of this that they actually held a march in Washington, DC! Yes, an entire fucking march! These are the Walking MAGAts. Or maybe its’ spinoff show, Fear The Walking MAGAts.

A group of just over 100 right-wing conspiracy theorists met in front of the White House on Saturday, marched down Pennsylvania Avenue past the Justice Department and FBI buildings, and gathered on Freedom Plaza for an open mic rally.

Several marchers brandished copies of Infowars Washington bureau chief Jerome Corsi’s latest book, “Killing the Deep State.” Corsi promotes the conspiracy theory known as The Storm, which is based on anonymous postings by someone known as Q, supposedly from deep within the government. “I see Q people,” read a sign at the march. Others yelled at tourists and pedestrians, “Who is QAnon? Look it up!”

Adherents believe that the dispatches from Q—or QAnon—are signaling that the Trump administration is getting ready to blow the lid off major conspiracy theories, including one that posits that leading Democratic political operatives are engaged in child sex trafficking.

In January, Corsi warned that eventually videos would come out showing “global elites” making children plead for their lives before “butchering” them. The related “Pizzagate” conspiracy theory nearly turned fatal when one adherent showed up at a restaurant that conspiracy theorists claimed was the center of a sex-trafficking ring and started shooting. At the Saturday march, one participant’s sign read, “Arrest Luciferian Pedophiles NOW.”

Yeah probably! So if you want a recap – the March For Our Lives had millions of people around the country and the world marching for something. Here in DC, you had 100 people marching for… absolutely nothing! But if you talk to the most die hard person involved in this cult, it is quite something because they believe in this bullshit. By the way – did you know the deep state elite satanic pedophiles were involved in Cohen’s firing? Neither did we!

Last night, right-wing preacher Lance Wallnau posted a video on his Facebook page in which he railed against the news that the FBI had raided the office of President Trump’s longtime personal attorney, Michael Cohen.

Wallnau fumed that the “deep state” and Trump’s “enemies in the CIA.” were violating attorney-client privilege solely in order to obtain information about Trump that could be leaked to the media in order to embarrass the president.

“Michael Cohen, Trump’s attorney, just had his hotel room and his office ransacked by the FBI. in order to find every personal communication he had with Donald Trump that can be leaked to the New York Times that can expose any embarrassment regarding Stormy Daniels,” Wallnau said. “So desperate, so despicable, so depraved are his enemies that they are actually raiding his lawyer’s office in order to find any type of shred of information that they can use because the Russia thing is going belly-up, so they are now going after Trump for did he ever, in 10 years, 12 years, did he ever do anything that can humiliate him or embarrass him?”

“It’s infuriating,” Wallnau said, as he began to pray against the intelligence agencies and “their quest to try to destroy their own president.”

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[font size="8"]Gun Nut Apologists
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You guys know David Hogg, right? I’ve been reporting on this kid lately, and he’s going places. In fact he’s really getting under the gun nuts’ skin. They are addicted to their death toys. They can’t stand it not to have their precious. Really, the gun nuts are like Gollem from Lord Of The Rings. Guns are the One Ring, and the gun nuts are chasing after their precious. In fact I reported that gun nuts have threatened to murder Hogg, and they have also started a whole website dedicated to stalking him. Well here’s one gun nut from St Louis who… yeah should probably keep his mouth shut.

St. Louis radio and TV personality Jamie Allman has landed in hot water with a tweet about his desire to assault Parkland student David Hogg with a hot poker.

Hogg has been a subject of criticism from pro-gun rights advocates since he and other Parkland students began speaking out and organizing rallies. The students are advocating for stronger gun laws after 19-year-old gunman Nikolas Cruz took the lives of 17 people at the school.

Allman's Twitter account is now "locked," which means anyone who wants to see his tweets first has to request his permission to follow him.

A screenshot of the controversial tweet, sent at 9:56 p.m. on March 26, began making its way around social media this week and was the subject of a story in the Riverfront Times, the St. Louis alt-weekly, on Friday.

Read more: http://www.stltoday.com/news/local/govt-and-politics/jamie-allman-lands-himself-in-hot-water-with-tweet-about/article_3b1fe951-d154-5d4f-a0f2-c37ea771d2af.html

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Really? You first thought is sodomizing with a hot poker? What is wrong with these assholes? Oh and in case you didn’t catch – his employer is Sinclair Broadcasting, which as you are probably well aware is under fire for trying to become state run TV under Trump:

In recent weeks, news anchors at local TV stations across the country have warned Americans about the “sharing of biased and false news” and the threat “fake stories” pose to democracy. As a recent video revealed, reporters recited word for word the same script bearing this warning.

What do these stations have in common? They’re all owned by Sinclair Broadcast Group, the largest television station conglomerate in the United States.

Critics have claimed that Sinclair — a company with close ties to the Trump administration and conservative politicians — is pushing its stations away from local coverage and toward a partisan brand of political reporting on national politics.

In new research, we find evidence that that appears to be the case. Stations bought by Sinclair reduce coverage of local politics, increase national coverage and move the ideological tone of coverage in a conservative direction relative to other stations operating in the same market.

Yeah sure whatever. So Sinclair is under fire for wanting to become state run TV under Trump. And then they have this douchebag to deal with. But at least Jamie got shit canned – partially. I mean if hot sodomy with a metal rod isn’t enough for a guy to get fired, what is?

“I’ve been hanging out getting ready to ram a hot poker up David Hogg’s ass,” Jamie Allman wrote on Twitter on March 26.

“We have accepted Mr. Allman’s resignation, and his show has been canceled,” a Sinclair spokesman told The Washington Post on Monday.

“You can’t say ‘Hey I’m just a kid,’” Allman said, according to the Riverfront Times. “We have to be allowed to refute what you’re saying... or to respond to it, you can’t be all the time grabbing your blanket when the going gets tough.”

Sinclair has also come under fire for forcing its anchors to recite the same scripted editorial against “false stories” that critics have likened to a “hostage video.”

Read more: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/jamie-allman-canceled_us_5acc21c5e4b07a3485e7a557

Goodbye Jamie, don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out! Now what Mr. Allman said was extremely horrible. But not the worst thing said about David Hogg this week. Behind door #2 – there is Ted “Mr. Poopy Pants Draft Dodger” Nugent:

Ted Nugent lashed out on Friday at the high school students who have led protests against gun violence in recent weeks, calling them "soulless" and "ignorant" in a fiery radio interview.

"I really feel sorry for them because it’s not only ignorant and dangerously stupid, but it’s soulless," Nugent said during an appearance on "The Joe Pags Show." "To attack the good, law-abiding families of America when well-known, predictable murderers commit these horrors is deep in the category of soulless."

"These poor children, I’m afraid to say this and it hurts me to say this, but the evidence is irrefutable, they have no soul," he added.

In the interview, Nugent railed against what he called the "dumbing down of America" by schools and teachers, whom he accused of teaching students' "lies."


Ahhhhhhh!!! Someone give me a warning next time! Hey “The Storm” fans, there’s a real satanic pedophile for you – Ted Nugent! Ted Nugent is your creepy uncle’s creepy uncle. In case you want to do a search on his past transgressions, just do a quick Google search. I won’t post them here. This is a comedy show, not a horror movie. Yes, the guy who bragged about shitting his pants to get out of Vietnam is threatening to murder high school students. And by the way – guess what he did after getting called out on his bullshit? Anyone? Yeah we need the sad Hulk music for this one!


NRA board member Ted Nugent isn’t backing down from his attacks on the Parkland high school mass shooting student survivors. “I stand by my words,” the rock star said in a Facebook videoSaturday night. On Good Friday Nugent had declared that the teenaged student survivors who are advocating for gun control so no other children have to die in a school massacre, “have no soul.”

On Saturday, in a rambling rant (below) about the media that was filled with inaccuracies Nugent said that news outlets including CNN, MSNBC, ABC, CBS, and HuffPost, along with organizations including Media Matters, MoveOn.org, and the Southern Poverty Law Center, had “claimed that it’s hate speech to identify the hate of people that call us child murderers, because we don’t believe in banning guns, which won’t save any lives.”

A quick Google search could find no evidence of any major organization labeling Nugent’s attack “hate speech.”

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[font size="8"] Top 10 Investigates: WAZE Into Oblivion
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It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates.

Traffic. It’s one of those things that we have to endure as a modern society. And it can often be the stuff of nightmares. Nobody likes to wait in traffic. Yes, you can counter that with the “nobody likes to wait in line” argument, but there are people who wait in line for days for the latest iPhone. So yeah there is that. But in the smartphone era, there are apps on your phone that can help route you around the worst of traffic. One of these apps is called “Waze” and the Waze app can get you in trouble if you are not careful.

Nobody could have known, several years ago, that technological progress could make life so complicated in Echo Park.

But along Baxter Street, everyone seems to have a story about the ineptitude of drivers — following directions from navigation apps — who can't seem to handle one of the steepest inclines in Los Angeles.

"The car came through our garden, went through two fences and ended up backwards hanging over our driveway," said Jason Luther, who was describing an accident that happened during the last rains.

"A lot of people can't make it up the hill," Baxter resident Robbie Adams said.

Why not? I asked.

"Because it's too steep, and they don't know how to drive up. So they stop and try to back down, and it's a mess because people are coming up behind them."

Yes – WTF LOL indeed. So the Waze app has been routing people onto one of the most notoriously difficult streets to drive on in America. So what is it about this street that is causing so much controversy? Well of course people from Los Angeles always react well in rainy driving conditions. Always.

With grades as steep as 32 degrees -- 35 percent -- residents say Baxter Street is most treacherous in the rain, with a history of cars skidding into front yards.

It has recently become more of a concern during dry times as well.

"The rain has always been an issue, but I guess this particular issue with traffic started when Waze became popular," said Baxter resident Robbie Adams, who has been active in pressing City Hall to take steps to ease the traffic volumes.

East of Glendale Boulevard in the hills of upper Echo Park, Baxter Street has two summits with cross streets.

In the intersection with Alvarado Street, Baxter is so steep, drivers cannot see the road on the other side until starting down.

And that is the typical reaction from Southern Californians when it comes to rain. So what happens when you drive on this most notoriously steep of streets? Well there are lots of bad things that can happen.

Even as tires were spinning and horns honking there during Wednesday's evening rush hours, residents crowded into a conference room at the Echo Park district office of City Councilman Mitch O'Farrell to meet with city transportation officials and press for solutions. Making Baxter one-way has been proposed, but the alternative favored by many residents is adding road signs prohibiting cut-through traffic during rush hours.

Going through the neighborhood, it seems most every neighbor has cellphone video to share of incidents that have occurred on Baxter. Adams has a pickup spinning its rear tires in front of his house. Brian Sayres recorded a car giving up the climb, attempting to back down, then knocking loose its bumper when it turned around. Daniel Ruiz's cellphone video shows a backup of traffic behind car halted at the summit. Another resident's posting on YouTube shows the semi-trailer of an 18 wheeler literally grounded at the summit, its wheels dangling in the air, before it was finally winched free.

Several residents shared stories of skidding cars sliding into yards. James Anderson said the car he parks outside his Baxter Street home has been hit twice, and after the second time, asked the driver what happened.

Well there is always that. So how do the residents of one of the steepest streets in America react to the traffic that Waze has created?

Baxter Street in Echo Park, East Los Angeles, is the fifth-steepest hill in America; it's so steep that inexperienced drivers struggle with it, spinning out and crashing, especially in the rain.

Luckily, it's not a main road and so the people who've used it for most of its 130+ year history have been locals who've developed the necessary specialized knowledge to traverse it.

But now Baxter Street has become something of a thoroughfare, with disastrous consequences as inexperienced drivers -- directed to shortcut through Baxter when the main roads are busy, especially when a rare LA rainstorm clogs traffic and turns Baxter's hills into a nearly impassable obstacle -- are steered onto it by their navigation apps.

We have a good friend who lives off of Baxter Street and we drive it several times a year on our way to dinner parties at his house, and it's a serious white-knuckler. Check out the Youtube subgenre of wheeled conveyances braving its slopes.

So there you have it – Baxter street is not only one of the most notoriously steep streets to drive on, there’s even a Youtube video dedicated to the insanity of driving on this street. That is it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

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[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Gather around my fair brothers and sisters! It’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it is our weekly duty to remind you that the holiest among us are also the most full of:

So my fair congregation, how does one choose the more godly candidate? And I answer you – they’re a republican. Well it’s a lot more complicated than that. Mainly they’re a person who the right wing evangelicals can pray to, and someone who speaks their language. Now it does not matter what kind of scandals or the magnitude of said scandals one was involved in. Are they are republican? If yes then that is who the people of JAYSUS will vote for! Just ask brother Tony!

NPR reported today that evangelical leaders are seeking to organize a meeting with President Trump this summer at which they intend to confront the president about his alleged affair with, and payoff of, pornographic actress Stormy Daniels. To those who have been following the Religious Right’s support for the president, this story seemed highly suspect because the movement has displayed nothing but blind loyalty in return for Trump’s willingness to enact their political agenda.

This afternoon, the Family Research Council’s Tony Perkins, who has played a central role in maintaining the Trump/Religious Right partnership, appeared on Todd Starnes’ radio program, where he announced that evangelicals have no intention whatsoever of confronting Trump about his personal immorality.

Perkins is among those who are in the process of planning the upcoming meeting, which he explained is intended to be nothing more than a follow-up to the meeting that Trump held with hundreds of evangelical activists prior to the 2016 election. Perkins said that there is a risk that evangelical voters may not be motivated to vote in the midterm elections and so this meeting is designed primarily as a means of highlighting the fact that Trump has largely kept his promises to enact their agenda.

So this is the Christian right’s idea of what passes for the more godly candidate in the 2018 midterm election. Scandals don’t matter. It don’t matter if Trump layeth down with thine porn star! Because that is blasphemy, and BLASPHEMY IS A SIN!!!! Can I get an amen???? So here is how one chooses the more godly candidate!

Intercessors for America has released its prayer guide for the 2018 midterm elections with the goal of electing more “godly” leaders.

IFA’s vision is “to see God’s purposes for America fulfilled through sustained prayer and Spirit-led obedience.” Kyle noted last month that IFA’s director, Dave Kubal, had posted a video talking about the 2018 midterms and the importance of “aligning intercessors with elected officials” in order “to see great advances of the kingdom of God” enacted “through our government.”

IFA’s 2018 guide touts the importance of getting engaged before primary elections, and it’s talking specifics:

There are twelve key House races in our nation, in which retirements, weak incumbents, or a huge field of primary candidates warrant critical intercession. These key races may affect the balance of power in Congress. Please join us in praying for these highlighted districts—even if you don’t live there.

Overall, pray that God would be honored in our elections and that Christians would not only pray, but also participate in elections.

So really you just need someone who can speak your language. And so what does that mean, my fair congregation? Well I answer you… if they are a good and decent person, they are not the kind of person the religious right looks up to! For they only look up to the worst among us! Like Donald J. Trump, for instance! Because apparently Trump is GAWD!!!!!

On his program yesterday, televangelist and prepper pastor Jim Bakker declared that the attacks on President Trump are a sign that “America is in a war against God.”

“Our president, it is like he is in a war,” Bakker said. “He is not running the country like he should because he is trying to defend himself. Don’t kid yourself, he is in warfare. God spoke to me today on this broadcast; what you are experiencing in this nation through the television and through all the networking and through Hollywood and through everything now—everything—you are feeling a spirit which is the spirit of Antichrist. There is a war in the world against God!”

Bakker said that Christians who ask “why would God give us a president who swears, why would he give us a president who has had affairs with women throughout his lifetime?” need to remember that King David was also “a womanizer” and that just about every American president has had multiple affairs.

“One of the most loved presidents of all times, from the information that I have first hand, had multiple affairs daily in the White House,” Bakker said, rather cryptically. “You say, ‘How could he know?’ Well, somebody had to bring the women up the stairs.”

But of course picking the more godly candidate among us doesn’t mean that we should question logic or reason in 2018. No, my fellow worshippers! Because Satan be damned, in the Trump era all logic and reason has been thrown out the window! Which is why the godliest among us will say batshit crazy stuff like this:

On Friday’s episode of his “TruNews” program, End Times broadcaster and right-wing conspiracy theorist Rick Wiles asserted that government “death squads” are responsible for carrying out mass shootings in order to provide a justification for imposing gun control.

This is not the first time that Wiles has made such a claim, as he also believes that these death squads were responsible for murdering Supreme Court justice Antonin Scalia and have been routinely beating up politicians.

“I think there is something very sinister going on,” Wiles said. “I personally think that there are death squads, top-secret death squads in this country.”

“Don’t rule out the possibility that these mass shootings are organized and carried out by a death squad and then some sap gets shot and we’re told that he was the perpetrator, he was the one who did it,” Wiles added. “How are we going to ask him? He’s dead.”

Yes Brother Rick – even JAYSUS is embarrassed at this one! Because insanity is a SIN!!! And sins must be punished by our GAWD, creator of all that is good and holy! Can I get an amen? And unlike you, Rick, we can point out in our book where it says that because in our Bible it most certainly does! So death squads are shooting people, because, reasons. But you know what? We must not pick the wrong candidate, or we might usher in the anti Christ! Because you know that the Anti Christ will reign down with fire and fury the destruction of our very planet!

On Friday, Dave Kubal of Intercessors for America hosted a Facebook livestream with End Times author William Koenig, who specializes in claiming that just about all of the major natural disasters and catastrophes that have struck America in recent decades have been God’s punishment on this nation for attempting to divide Israel.

During the discussion session, Koenig warned that White House senior adviser Jared Kushner’s efforts to secure a Middle East peace plan could lead to the rise of the Antichrist.

“There is going to be a peace deal,” Koenig said, suggesting that such a deal would signal that we are living in the End Times, as foretold in Daniel 9:27. “It will be a seven-year covenant. This is the key final-day peace deal. For three and a half years, there will be relative peace and that the midpoint of that three and a half years in the covenant, the Antichrist will come on the Temple Mount and declare himself to be the Messiah. The false prophet spoke of in Revelation will acknowledge that he is the Messiah and then in the last final three and a half years, leading up to the final battle for Jerusalem, which is Armageddon, you’ll have Satan’s wrath, then God’s wrath leading up to the final battle.”

There you have it, folks! Don’t pick the wrong candidate or you will witness the death and destruction of humanity! That is the take away I hope you get from today’s sermon. Mass has ended may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Laura Loomer
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This week’s “This Fucking Guy” is actually a woman – and a seriously batshit crazy one at that. I’m of course talking about Laura Loomer. If you have been paying attention to the Alt Right blog-o-sphere like I have, you’ve probably heard her name mentioned many times. But for those that haven’t, let’s run down her credentials. She’s a regular contributor to Infowars and Project Veritas, got kicked out of court for questioning whether or not the plaintiff was Islamic, got arrested after storming last year’s Shakesphere In The Park production of Julius Caesar, and claims to be a journalist despite having no journalist credentials whatsoever. At least this show – you know we don’t have journalistic integrity, but the difference is we’re proud to admit it! So here’s what Laura has been up to lately.

Right-wing activists and media figures went all-out in their attacks on the March for Our Lives gun reform rallies on Saturday, including attacking the rallies’ funding and organization, blaming “political correctness” and comparing Marjory Stoneman Douglas high school shooting survivor David Hogg to Adolf Hitler.

Hundreds of thousands of people gathered in Washington, D.C., and in cities across the country to call for stricter gun laws and call out politicians who have received funding and support from the National Rifle Association. Polling shows that most Americans support the march’s calls for gun reform.

Predictably, right-wing pundits went after billionaire George Soros—conservative activists’ favorite bogeyman—in an effort to minimize the legitimacy of the protests. Breitbart radio host Joel Pollak said it was “no surprise” that the march was a “Soros production.” The site’s sports editor Dylan Gwinn said that “we all know that these kids are being coached.”


Right-wing conspiracy theorist and Infowars “reporter” Laura Loomer posted a selfie in response to the march, in which she wore a jacked with a patch that reads: “I don’t need feminism. I carry a 9mm.” Loomer also chided activists who ran a voter registration booth at a benefit concert held the night before the march.

Holy fuck! If that’s what she’s like in real life, I would hate to see her in other situations! “I don’t need safety regulations! I have a 9mm!”. “Who needs the TSA? I have a 9mm!”. “Who needs a DUI check? I have a 9mm!!!”. “I can’t believe I got cut off on the freeway! I have a 9mm!!” And so on. And that wasn’t the only protest Loomer said something off the wall batshit crazy at.

Unhinged conspiracy theorist Laura Loomer urged her followers to archive the shooter’s personal profiles, claiming that the shooter “is a Jihadi and they want to cover it up”:


Oh come on, who covers up things like jihadists? What? Too soon? Well, remember a couple of weeks ago when the UK detained a couple of Alt Right / Alt Lite / Diet Alt Lite whatever the fuck they call themselves activists got arrested in the UK? Well there was this.

Two far-right activists were detained and deported when they attempted to enter the United Kingdom this weekend, triggering outrage among right-wing media personalities in the U.S. and Europe.

On Friday, far-right YouTube vlogger Brittany Pettibone and her boyfriend, Austrian “Identitarian” activist Martin Sellner, were detained by United Kingdom border police for three days, after which they were deported back to Austria. Pettibone frequently affiliates with right-wing extremists and has earned a spot in the hearts and minds of alt-right activists by flirting with white nationalism, such as the idea that it’s “our fault” if white people become a minority race. She also used to co-host a podcast with the explicitly alt-right personality Tara McCarthy.

Documents provided to Pettibone explain that immigration authorities denied her entry because she intended to work with Tommy Robinson, an anti-Muslim activist employed by Rebel Media, and was carrying “leaflets with scenarios regarding possible violence” at a speech Sellner was scheduled to give.


Conspiracy theorist “journalist” Laura Loomer felt the need to chime in that she would not be flying to the U.K. “to join the sisterhood of traveling detainees”:

Which is definitely true. And why am I not surprised that Laura is friends with those lunatics? I mean Jack Posobiec and Mike Cernovich are also Diet Low Calorie Alt Lite, and they also make shit up as they go along. Remember that Julius Caesar play from last year I talked about? Guess what?

A rightwing protester has been charged with trespassing after interrupting a New York production of Julius Caesar during the assassination scene and shouting: “This is violence against Donald Trump.”

The protester, who later identified herself as Laura Loomer, interrupted the Shakespeare in the Park production on Friday night and shouted “this is political violence against the right” while audience members booed and told her to get off the stage.

The incident was filmed by Jack Posobiec, a rightwing provocateur best known for helping to spread the Pizzagate conspiracy theory. He stood up as Loomer was escorted off stage by security guards and yelled at the crowd: “You are all Goebbels. You are all Nazis like Joseph Goebbels … You are inciting terrorists. The blood of Steve Scalise is on your hands.”

Oh come on, Laura, if you’re gonna accuse someone of being Hitler, for one you should take a look at that president who you admire so much. And second, you need to hang with some real Nazis. I’m not talking your run of the mill tiki torch, khaki wearing Nazis. I’m talking real fucking Nazis.

Meanwhile, the radical right was busy creating a troll storm buttressed by popular right wing websites like Hotair.com, which warned that "An Army of Illegal Aliens is Marching on America." By Saturday afternoon, the hashtag, #stopthecaravan was trending on Twitter. The SPLC hate tracker, which automatically detects trends among a population of far-right Twitter accounts, registered #stopthecaravan as trending.

Also on Saturday, the neo-Nazi Website, Daily Stormer, warned of "Brown Hordes on the Move," and provided a phone number urging readers to call the White House. After Trump's tweets, the Daily Stormer posted a follow-up article on Sunday arguing that the president "has at least heard us."

The notorious hate site Stormfront warned of "an avalanche of mud" heading for the U.S. border. As one poster on the neo-Nazi forum put it, "We should exercise our second amendment rights and meet them at the border, guns in hand."

Other racists began "doxing" the organizers of the migrant march. On The Right Stuff forum, Michael Peinovich posted an urgent request for readers to call the White House and a poster in the thread put up the contact information for the group organizing the caravan, Pueblo Sin Fronteras, urging its racist followers to email them. Others encouraged readers to attack the group's Facebook page. On Peinovich's Twitter feed, he retweeted a post with the contact information for the group, including phone numbers and emails. In the same thread, a Twitter user named "Frex" posted Pueblos Sin Fronteras organizer Alex Mensing's Facebook page, including photos of his family, writing, "Now is the time to go out and mine all his social media before he goes private."

Yeah Laura, there’s some real fucking Nazis for you. And guess what? They all vote for Trump! That’s Laura Loomer, this week’s This Fucking Gal.

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[font size="8"]Alex Jones
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Holy shit, Alex Jones has had quite the week and if you think we're not going to include him in our weekly show you are wrong, very wrong! You lose! You get nothing! Good day sir! So our good friends at Right Wing Watch (really, the Top 10 wouldn't exist without them) went to his press conference over the weekend. In case you're unaware, Infowars is currently facing multiple lawsuits for slander (shocker) and Alex put on quite the show to address the current problems facing the conspiracy theory site. RWW went to the taping and well, it's like seeing Alex put on a live broadcast of Infowars.

Infowars host and nationally known conspiracy theorist Alex Jones traveled to Washington, D.C., this week to host a press conference aimed at rallying support for Infowars hosts and guests while they face defamation lawsuits and battle against what they claim is undue censorship from social media platforms.

The press event at the National Press Club and a follow-up event at a nearby hotel failed to deliver any major revelations about the lawsuits Jones and his team are facing, apart from an announcement that Jones and his legal counsel had moved that one of the cases against him be dismissed. This predictable announcement was accompanied by more than four hours of press briefings that resembled a typical day on “The Alex Jones Show.”

Early yesterday morning, Jones and his allies kicked off a press conference they said would address the multiple lawsuits that Infowars and its guests have been named in. But the conference quickly became just another venue to advance one of Infowars’ main objectives: attacking and delegitimizing credible news media.

First on deck was pro-Trump pundit and One America News contributor Jack Posobiec, who has appeared often on Infowars. He read excerpts from an Eleanor Roosevelt speech about the importance of freedom and said afterward that he wanted to keep his appearance focused on the vague concept of individual liberty, rather than commenting on the defamation lawsuits that Jones and his crew are facing.

So here's a few of the greatest hits - and gee would you be surprised to learn that he blamed Soros for everything? And that most of his friends including Jerome Corsi and Roger Stone are also under indictment?

First on deck was pro-Trump pundit and One America News contributor Jack Posobiec, who has appeared often on Infowars. He read excerpts from an Eleanor Roosevelt speech about the importance of freedom and said afterward that he wanted to keep his appearance focused on the vague concept of individual liberty, rather than commenting on the defamation lawsuits that Jones and his crew are facing.

But soon afterward, a host of Infowars staff and regular guests, including GOP “dirty trickster” operative Roger Stone, Infowars Washington bureau chief Jerome Corsi, Infowars reporters Lee Ann McAdoo and Millie Weaver, Sputnik’s Lee Stranahan and Gateway Pundit White House reporter Lucian Wintrich, joined Jones to speak at the podium about the lawsuits and the threat they claimed these lawsuits pose to their First Amendment rights. Jones made a point to tell press conference attendees that the National Press Club had removed its logo from the podium it lent to Infowars for the briefing.

And then there was this:

Jones said he had been sued 13 times in the last year, for which he blamed the Right’s favorite bogeyman, billionaire George Soros. Like many of his guest speakers, Jones claimed that the lawsuits against him were designed to destroy the First Amendment, which he says would be the first step in an alleged plot to repeal other constitutional protections.

Jones said that the mainstream media “killed itself” and has since “circled their wagons” to defang the First Amendment and censor content creators like Infowars that have experienced success on non-traditional platforms like YouTube. Jones compared Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey to a communist dictator and alleged that the website ranking service Alexa had been rigged to disadvantage his website.

And then they of course brought up QAnon. If I were to put my finger on it I would say someone at Infowars is Q. It's entirely possible - they know way too much about it.

Afterward, Corsi took the stage to discuss QAnon, the anonymous author of more than one thousand cryptic riddles on 4Chan and 8Chan that Corsi and other conspiracy theorists believe to be a top-ranking Trump administration official. QAnon and the related conspiracy theory known as “The Storm” are topics that Corsi spends literal hours each day attempting to decode.

“QAnon is military intelligence and close to Trump,” Corsi said. “And the intelligence we’re getting, that we’ve explained on Infowars, really is a lot of the inside script.”

When I asked Jones about his prior claims that the White House had asked that Jerome Corsi cover the transparently insane “QAnon” conspiracy theory, he told me, “That’s private stuff.”

Alex, keep doing what you are doing. But that’s not the only nonsense Alex was up to this week. Alex well, is straight up crazy. Of course you know that every single mass shooting, Alex is quick to call the shooting a false flag. Well after the horrifying gas attack in Syria this week, guess what?

Yesterday, conspiracy theory architect Alex Jones echoed the Assad regime and called the chemical attack a “false flag” launched by Syrian rebel forces that was meant to keep the U.S. and other world powers engaged in Syria’s civil war.

“It has every hallmark of a false flag. And why does it have every hallmark of a false flag? The Russians have announced they’re pulling out a month ago, the United States announces it’s going to pull out a week ago—President Trump. The globalists openly want to keep us there and break the country into three parts. This is a big, big deal,” Jones said.

He added, “It’s so obvious that they’re trying to suck us into a war.”

Infowars editor-at-large Paul Joseph Watson also uploaded his own video defending the Assad regime from accusations that it was behind the chemical attacks in Douma.

“With the Syrian army and Russia on the verge of defeating ISIS and jihadist rebels in the town of Douma, they launch a massive chemical weapons attack that brings global condemnation, inviting massive U.S. airstrikes across the country and we’re just supposed to swallow this entire narrative without question,” Watson said. “No. That’s insane.”

I mean come on, when Paul Joseph Watson calls you out for being insane, that’s pretty fucking insane all right! Thank you audience! But that wasn’t the most batshit crazy thing Alex has said this week, I mean who are we kidding?

Conspiracy theorist Alex Jones told Infowars listeners today that liberal leaders in the tech industry, politics and media—who Jones refers to as “the globalists”—want to brutally murder people in the Midwest, rape Infowars viewers’ wives and children, and starve conservatives in forced labor camps.

Jones complained that we here at Right Wing Watch present “the great truths” that he espouses at Infowars as if they might be wildly dangerous conspiracy theories. He also dissed conservative websites that criticize Infowars and claimed he was working to fight a “New World Order” led by globalists he believes want to brutally murder most of America.

“They want power and they want to direct everybody and they want to kill the Midwest. They don’t want to just reorganize things. They want a giant blood-letting. It’s their religion. They hate flyover country, they hate bitter clingers. Hillary [Clinton] hates you. They all hate you,” Jones said.

He added, “They want to put you in a forced labor camp and watch you starve to death because it makes them feel powerful. They want to rape your wife. They want—just like in East Germany—if you want to be in the theater or be involved, you have to have sex with the party officials. They want to be able to kill and rape whoever they want. They want authoritarianism to carry out criminal operations and the raping of your children.”

As to what that is, we’re totally unclear. Between that and the interview with Mr. Draft Dodger Poopy Pants Ted Nugent, this honestly is not the craziest thing Alex has said lately. Last week, he said this about democrats in Wisconsin and Michigan:

Conspiracy theorist Alex Jones told Infowars listeners today that liberal leaders in the tech industry, politics and media—who Jones refers to as “the globalists”—want to brutally murder people in the Midwest, rape Infowars viewers’ wives and children, and starve conservatives in forced labor camps.

Jones complained that we here at Right Wing Watch present “the great truths” that he espouses at Infowars as if they might be wildly dangerous conspiracy theories. He also dissed conservative websites that criticize Infowars and claimed he was working to fight a “New World Order” led by globalists he believes want to brutally murder most of America.

“They want power and they want to direct everybody and they want to kill the Midwest. They don’t want to just reorganize things. They want a giant blood-letting. It’s their religion. They hate flyover country, they hate bitter clingers. Hillary [Clinton] hates you. They all hate you,” Jones said.

He added, “They want to put you in a forced labor camp and watch you starve to death because it makes them feel powerful. They want to rape your wife. They want—just like in East Germany—if you want to be in the theater or be involved, you have to have sex with the party officials. They want to be able to kill and rape whoever they want. They want authoritarianism to carry out criminal operations and the raping of your children.”


Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! What is it with this guy and his weird obsession with rape and child rape? Yes this are horrifying crimes. But you know what? We don’t obsess over them the way Infowars and Infowars fans do! I could sit here all day and show you all the batshit crazy stuff Alex Jones said last week. Man, he went off the deep end. Which really isn’t that hard for him to do. Stuff like this:

Alex Jones, the nation’s most notorious conspiracy theorist, told Infowars listeners today that he would happily move to Mexico if it became “beautiful everywhere like it is in some spots” because he is “not afraid of brown people” unless they turn into “leftists.”

Today on “The Alex Jones Show,” Jones was discussing the “caravan” of Central American immigrants currently traveling through Mexico and hoping to enter the United States.

“I want to see these countries industrialized. I want to see them first-world. I want to see Mexico beautiful everywhere like it is in some spots and first-world. I’ll go move down there,” Jones said.

He added, “I’m not afraid of brown people. I’m afraid of brown people turning into leftists that hate my guts just like white leftists.”

So it doesn’t matter if your ultra far right brown people come into this country, but those scary liberal brown people are the ones he worries about! Watch out, Alex, they might want to give you health care and have that tin foil hat surgically removed from your head! But apparently there’s a holocaust going on that we don’t know about! Where did you hear that crazy shit from? From Infowars? You betcha!

Alex Jones, the unhinged conspiracy theorist leading Infowars, claimed that “globalists” are utilizing radiation coming from mobile phones to carry out a “silent, invisible holocaust.”

On today’s episode of “The Alex Jones Show,” a major topic of discussion was the supposed health risks associated with radiation coming from cell phones’ wireless transmissions. As Jones was ranting about the alleged risks, he took a bizarre turn to claim that leaders in the tech industry, political sphere, and corporate world are using cell phone radiation as part of a plan to execute humanity.

“If you want to talk about something that’s killing millions of people—not 40-something—how about you talk about radiation? How about we have walk-outs in schools over cell towers on top of the schools? How about we have walk-outs over cell phone radiation? How about we have walk-outs over all of that?” Jones said.

He added, “Because this is what kills thousands of times what guns do every year. And this is how the globalists in this silent, invisible holocaust are killing everybody in their plan.”

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[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
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Oh hey you know what time it is? It’s time for this!

Yes it’s time once again for People Are Dumb. Because as you should know by now that people are people, and people are dumb. I want to start with this story out of Anchorage, Alaska, and people, don’t even try to fight a moose. Because a moose is one of the most dangerous and deadly animals to deal with, and if you even attempt to fight a moose, the moose will win 10 times out of 10. If you try to kick a moose’s ass, the moose will kick yours 10 times harder. And it doesn’t take a wildlife expert to know that one, just 5 minutes on Youtube. Do your best impression of the opening credits for Monty Python and the Holy Grail here.

(Newser) – A man was injured north of Anchorage after a moose that he had just kicked stomped his foot in return, state officials said. KTVA-TV reported the man escaped with major injuries in the encounter Thursday with the moose and her calf, the AP reports. "It sounds like the moose were on a trail and in this case, it sounds like the guy was trying to go through them," State Department of Fish and Game spokesman Ken Marsh says. "That's never a good idea." The two moose left the area after the man had his foot stomped, says Alaska Troopers spokeswoman Megan Peters.

"I am not a biologist, but as a lifelong Alaskan I would advise people not to go around kicking moose," Peters says. Moose have vast leg strength, Marsh said. "If you get into a kicking contest with a moose, guess who's going to win?" South-central Alaska has seen a number of violent incidents involving moose this spring, including a man who had a moose swipe at him with its hoof while feeding it and a cocker spaniel attacked by a moose in an Anchorage yard. Marsh says moose sightings are on the rise as females prepare for calving season in mid-May.

Yes, the people responsible for producing this story, have been sacked. So next up I want to talk about this story out of Denmark that wouldn’t be out of place in a Simpsons gag. So if you’re trying to blow something up, you might want to read the directions on how to blow that said something up next time because otherwise this happens.

A Danish cultural centre has been damaged after a 53-metre high silo fell the wrong way while being demolished.

In video of the explosion in the town of Vordingborg, onlookers cheer the detonation, but then watch in astonishment as the tower toppled towards the waterfront library and music school.

No one was injured in the accident.

Denmark’s explosives association said preparations for the demolition seemed to be correct, Danish newspaper BT reported.


So yeah people definitely read the directions next time! So next up in “People Are Dumb”, how does one deal with a problem of serial masturbation? I know! Pizza! Because everything is better with pizza, don’t you think?

Dart then instituted a program that rewarded "serial masturbators" with pizza if they went 30 days without a sexual assault or masturbating incident, according to the lawsuit.

Since detainees who had never exposed themselves were not eligible to receive pizza as a reward, the program had a reverse effect, leading to an "increase in exposure incidents" since the detainees without prior incidents "were now incentivized to commit indecent exposure and masturbation in order to qualify for a pizza reward," court documents state.

The plaintiffs have also filed class-action lawsuits with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission and the U.S. Department of Justice, alleging discrimination and retaliation in violation of Title VII of the Civil Rights Act. Those charges are currently being investigated, according to the release.

"Some women suffer numerous incidents of exposure and/or masturbation in a single day even as male attorneys are not targeted for these incidents," the release states.

Wade Wilson is right – what situation isn’t improved by pizza? Next up – dinosaurs! And this again wouldn’t seem too out of place as a Simpsons joke. We go to Canon City, Colorado for this one.

CANON CITY, Colo. (AP) - Everyone knows dinosaurs are extinct. But this is a case of one that was extinguished.

It was a 24-foot high electronic Tyrannosaurus rex featured at the Royal Gorge Dinosaur Experience in Colorado.

Thursday morning, the T. rex began smoldering before catching fire.

Both the dinosaur and spectators were fully involved; park visitors stood and watched as flames spread through the dinosaur.

At times the T. rex appeared to be breathing flames.

Next up – newspapers. Yes not even our nation’s newspapers are immune from stupidity, or user error. Take this example from the Denver Post which posted this:

The Denver Post's guide to Coors Field published Friday had a small issue -- the huge picture on the front of the newspaper's Life section isn't of Coors Field. It's Citizens Bank Park in Philadelphia.

The photo spread quickly across social media Friday morning. The Post eventually responded by tweeting that it was sorry for the mistake and including a picture of Coors Field.

Can we show that? Because it’s pretty spectacular:

And finally this week for People Are Dumb – 911. Yes that emergency hotline. I love 911 abuse stories, like the kind of person who calls 911 to report that McDonalds ran out of chicken nuggets. We could do an entire People Are Dumb just dedicated to crazy people dialing 911. And the British equivalent of 911 is 112. Well, police in Cambridgeshire, England decided to do a study of how many 112 calls originated from fast food restaurants, McDonalds in particular. Well…

Police call-outs to or about fast food chain McDonald's have more than tripled in three years across Cambridgeshire.

The crimes ranged from reports of missing persons to violence and domestic incidents, a freedom of information request revealed.

The News’ previously told how the McDonald's in Ely Leisure Park has become a focus for police - with customers being put off their happy meals because of youngsters constantly causing trouble.

Last year was by far the busiest with 17 call-outs about incidents relating to the fast food chain, more than double the previous year.

Over the last three years there have been 26 recorded cases of incidents related to McDonald's across Cambridgeshire.

That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Stupidest State Contest: Round 1 Week 4
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16 states will enter, but only one will be crowned the new Top 10 Conservative Idiots Stupidest State!

Welcome back! I hope you all filled out your brackets! This week, we’re live from the home of the Los Angeles Chargers, the beautiful Stub Hub Center in Carson, California. And we have not one, but two exciting matchups this week! Last week –if there’s one thing Florida does well – it’s shoot first and ask questions later, and they totally brought their A game against Looooooosiana. Meanwhile in the fight for Fiscal Irresponsibility, Wisconsin utterly routed the casino moguls in Nevada. See? That’s what happens when you get Koch money – it goes far! And this week we’ve got another double header for the final week of Round 1 – and we’ve saved the best for last as Virginia looks to unseat Texas as the king of batshit, while we have a pair of first timers – Utah and Missouri – looking to unseat Alabama as the king of the Family Values conference. Can they do it? Let’s get out our brackets so you can follow along!

[font size="6"]Match 1: Batshit Conference: Virginia Vs. Texas [/font]

[font size="4"]Virginia[/font]

So the Commonwealth State is a new state to the Stupidest State contest. Yes this is their first time in the NFFSA tournament. Virginia is right next to Washington, DC. It is the home of world class universities like the University of Virginia, George Mason University and Virginia Tech. It’s also the home of uber religious schools like Jerry Falwell’s Liberty University and Pat Robertson’s Regent University. So how did they get here? Well, Charlottesville proved to be a huge array of white supremacy and stupidity. And Virginia is going up against last year’s champions. But white supremacy and religious insanity aren’t the only things Virginia is known for. In fact it’s a toxic stew of stupidity. After all it’s the home of the Confederacy and morons who still don’t know what the Confederacy means.

CHARLOTTESVILLE, Va. (WDBJ7) -- The Virginia Flaggers hoisted a 30' x 50' Confederate battle flag on a 120' pole along I-64 near Charlottesville.

According to a spokesperson for the Virginia Flaggers group, the flag, named "the Charlottesville I-64 Spirit of Defiance Memorial Battle Flag" was "dedicated to the glory of God, and will fly in honor and memory of all Confederate soldiers".

The group believes that the flag symbolizes a "duty to see that the true history of the South is presented to future generations".

This flag is the 27th memorial battle flag raised on major interstates and roadways across Virginia.


Yeah so Virginia is home to the hardcore confederates. So you know people say the youth are our future, but when you have youth like these… there’s nowhere to go but up from here, right?

Over the weekend, a video of the Virginia Tech women’s lacrosse team singing along to the song “Freaky Friday” by Lil Dicky was posted on Twitter. During the video players can be heard singing along to the lyrics, including the word “n-----.”

"Following an away match on Saturday, March 24, a member of our squad posted a video to social media of the team singing along to a song that included derogatory lyrics,” said head coach John Sung in a statement emailed to the Collegiate Times. “We are engaged in conversations within the campus community to share our sincere apology.”

Coaches as well as members of the Virginia Tech Athletics administration met with the full team to discuss the video that was posted. Sung considers this to be a teaching moment for the team and hopes the team will be able to learn from their actions as they move forward.

“We have confidence that the team will learn from this mistake and understand that these actions reflect poorly on our program and do not represent the values of our program or the principles of the university,” Sung said.

[font size="4"]Texas [/font]

Hey everyone let’s give it up for last year’s champions! Yeah!! They are back, they are rested, and they look ready to do some damage. But Virginia with their racism and hardcore white supremacy has been a proven tough fight for the champs. Everyone knows what Texas is the home of – it’s the home of world class sports teams like the Rangers, Cowboys, Spurs, Astros, Texans, Stars, and Mavericks. It’s also the home of world class universities like Texas A&M, Baylor University, Rice University, and Stephen F. Austin University. So what propelled Texas to the king of the NFFSA last year? Well it was a toxic stew of university scandals, doomsday preppers, and of course Ted Cruz. So what are the champs up to since we last saw them? Well they’re still feeling the heat from the Baylor Scandal.

Baylor University paid former football coach Art Briles $15.1 million and former university President Ken Starr $4.5 million after both were fired in 2016 {yes, that Ken Starr}.

The disclosure was included in Baylor’s IRS Form 990 for the 2016 tax year, which was recently filed.

Briles was fired and Starr was removed as president in May 2016 after an independent investigation found a universitywide “fundamental failure” in handling sexual assault reports. Starr later resigned as chancellor and law professor.

“Baylor stands by the unprecedented corrective actions the Board of Regents made in May of 2016, which included leadership changes within the university administration and athletic department and the acceptance of 105 recommendations to improve our processes, communication, training and response related to incidents of sexual violence within our campus community,” the university said in a statement released Friday.

Read more: http://www.wacotrib.com/news/higher_education/baylor-paid-briles-million-starr-million-after-removal-amid-sexual/article_2bdda9a0-43d6-5e13-94dc-72b28c1db737.html

I don’t remember that on the open carry list! So what is Texas also the home of that would make them repeat the batshit conference? Well they also have batshit crazy street preachers!

DENTON -- About 20 self-described "street preachers," some of whom held anti-gay and anti-Black Lives Matter signs, caused a stir Thursday on the University of North Texas campus, where more than 300 students gathered to counter protest or watch the ordeal.

The preachers had been attending the National Street Preachers Conference in Arlington, according to two preachers at the campus. One of the men, 26-year-old Sebastian Bryan, described the group as "regular Bible-believing Christians" who wanted to show people "their need for a savior to call people to repentance," he said.

At least two signs included Bible verses, while others included provocative phrases such as "Every Muslim is a Jihadist" and "AIDS: Judgement or Cure?"

[font size="6"]And The Winner Is… [/font]

Oh my god we have a major upset brewing in the tournament! Texas was heavily favored to repeat as conference champions but due to heavy injuries they lost big time. Utterly routed by the young, upstart Virginia team! Final score – Virginia wins by 32! Final score – 100 – 78! Virginia celebrates on the court and the champs go home defeated! Wow!

[font size="6"]Match 2: Family Values Conference: Utah Vs Missouri[/font]

[font size="4"]Utah[/font]

Utah is a new state we have not yet covered. It is the home of some of the world’s most beautiful scenery, and especially for America. It’s home to world class skiing – the home of a former Olympic site – Park City, Utah. It’s also the home of a very unique national monument – the Four Corners national monument! Yes, Utah is the home of a monument where the borders of 4 states touch – Utah, Colorado, New Mexico, and Arizona. The state of Utah is one of the smaller states in America population wise. And it’s also the home of the Mormon Church. As the state is heavily dominated by this religion and its’ reflected in most of its’ laws. In fact the Mormon church is so crazy that this is the type of shit residents in Salt Lake City have to endure.

Marissa Smith sat in her Mormon bishop’s office in the same chair her boyfriend had the week before. He had looked across the same wooden desk as she was now. He had stared at the same plain walls. Maybe he had nervously played with his hands, too — she wasn’t sure.

She wasn’t sure, though, if he had been asked the same questions.

“What time of night do you kiss?” the local lay leader pressed Smith about her relationship. She answered, but she didn’t want to. He continued on:

“Where do you go with your boyfriend?”

“Are you sitting up or laying down?”

“Was any clothing off?”

“Then he asked me if I was surprised by what happens when boys orgasm,” Smith recalled. “I didn’t even know how to answer that question. I didn’t want to talk to my bishop again.”

Read more: https://www.sltrib.com/religion/local/2018/03/30/mormons-set-to-march-through-salt-lake-city-calling-for-an-end-to-bishops-interviews-with-children-about-sexual-matters/

Yeah that is happening! When the Mormon church gets in your business, they get really far up in your business! That sounded wrong, didn’t it? But the good news is that the Mormon church has taken a dip into LGBT rights. But don’t expect them to dive head first. You got to start somewhere!

As Russell M. Nelson ascended to the top of the LDS Church and its all-male hierarchy, the question came: What about women?

“We love ’em,” Nelson quipped at the Jan. 16 news conference announcing his presidency of the nearly 16 million-member Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

The 93-year-old leader (as well as his two counselors in the faith’s governing First Presidency) praised the mothers and daughters in their lives who had produced missionary sons and bishops and had served as “influencers” to the men.

The trio made no mention of single women in the global faith, presidents of the all-female LDS Relief Society, or the armies of women who work at every level of Mormon congregational life no matter their marital status. Nor did the three speak of recent strides by the church toward gender equity or even hint at the word “feminist.”

Read more: https://www.sltrib.com/religion/2018/02/22/where-mormon-church-is-on-women-tk/

[font size="6"]Missouri[/font]

Last time we saw the Show Me State, they were involved in a bitter, intense fight between residents of Furgeson, Missouri and an out of control police department that was willing to shoot first and ask questions later. But this year – Missouri is in the news for a far different reason. But first you know that Missouri is the home of such universities as Mizzou. It’s also the home of world class sports teams including the Kansas City Royals, the St Louis Cardinals, and the St. Louis Blues. So why is Missouri back in the news? Well there’s this!

In the dark before sunrise, high school sophomore Brittany Koerselman, belly bulging, seven months pregnant and feeling like a cow, tucked herself into the borrowed white prom dress that would be her wedding gown.

The Iowa teen didn’t want to be a child bride. But the cops were coming.

She was 15, not even old enough to drive on her own. Jeremie Rook, her boyfriend and the father of her baby, was 21.

It didn’t matter how “infatuatedly in love” she was then with everything about Jeremie — his long chocolate hair, his bad-boy attitude, tongue stud and 28 tattoos. In Iowa, a 21-year-old having sex with a 15-year-old is statutory rape. The evidence was alive in her womb.

Read more here: http://www.kansascity.com/news/state/missouri/article204287484.html

Holy shit indeed! This is a stunning level of evil here folks. Not only having to be victim of that, but also having to be forced to get married to the asshole and carry his baby is a stunning, jaw dropping level of evil! And they tried to restrict it, but….

JEFFERSON CITY (AP) — The Missouri House has passed a bill to ban marriages of children under 15 years old.

House members voted 95-50 Monday to send the bill to the Senate. Backers say it would help stop abuse through coerced marriages, while opponents argue it would take away parents' rights to decide whether to allow their children to marry.

Children ages 15-17 now can get married with a parent's permission. Those younger than 15 need approval from a judge.

The bill would require 15- to 17-year-olds to get a judge's approval following a court hearing. Children 14 years old or younger couldn't marry.

Read more: https://www.news-leader.com/story/news/politics/2018/02/19/missouri-house-votes-restrict-child-marriages/353758002/

[font size="6"]And The Winner Is… [/font]

No doubt about this one. Missouri utterly destroys Utah by a whopping 27 points! They will go on to face Alabama for Family Values supremacy in the next round. Final score – 85 – 58.

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

The Elite 8 has been set folks! Now as the rules dictate we will do an expansion round for each of these conferences for the conference championship. Single elimination. The winner moves on. The loser goes home. Next week, we’re live from the home of the San Jose Sharks, HP Pavilion, and we will see Florida take on the champions Montana in a fight for Gun Nut Supremacy.

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Suicidal Tendencies[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen, we’re going to dedicate April to celebrating all things punk rock. There’s a lot in punk rock right now. You have Punk Rock Bowling in Vegas, you have the Punk In Drublic festival, and the Flogging Molly cruise all happening. So with that in mind, April is punk month here at the Top 10. Which means I want to see some circle pits! And this time we’re kicking things off with a legendary punk band from Venice, California. Their latest EP is called “Get Your Fight On!”, and you can see them at Punk Rock Bowling in Las Vegas on May 27th, playing the title track from that album, give it up for Suicidal Tendencies!

See you next week!


Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: City National Grove Of Anaheim, Anaheim, CA
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Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

April 4, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-12: Wheel Of Corruption & The Goblet Of Fire Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-12: Wheel Of Corruption & The Goblet Of Fire Edition

Ed. Note - due to a scheduling conflict, the Top 10 will be posted early today! Also I won't be able to get to the YouTube shooting and the oh-so-predictable RW reactions to that, since it happened at the time we were putting together this week's edition, but we will cover it in full next week. In the meantime, our good friends at Right Wing Watch do a good job of covering the worst of it: http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/these-are-some-of-the-worst-right-wing-reactions-to-the-shooting-at-youtube-hq/ And now back to our regularly scheduled programming! Enjoy!

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! Sign up now and get a free iPhone 8 on us! We are back everybody! I want to start by saying I am not going to talk about the craze of condom snorting – yes that’s a thing. And it’s as disgusting as it sounds. What? You see the wheel here on stage, I got my sous chef Fernando coming, I would like to hang onto the contents of my stomach thanks! Yeah fuck that story and everyone who participates in that horrifically disgusting act. No, fuck them! Seriously! Let’s move on to much happier news. Congratulations to the Villanova Wildcats for winning the NCAA tournament this year. Michigan Wolverines, you put up a good fight, and you can rest assured that you will not have to go to the White House to meet Trump. Yeah remember when we had a president who wasn’t a complete jackass? Those were good times. And you know this might be one of the most insane NCAA tournaments I’ve ever seen. You had ups, you had downs. You had highs. You had lows. You had lows getting beaten by highs. You had highs getting beaten by lows. You had 98 year old nuns. There was a number 1 seed getting upset by a number 16 seed. And Duke lost. But all in all this was also one of the best NCAA tournaments I’ve ever seen. It sucks for Sister Jean, I mean America was really pulling for a win for Loyola Chicago because of her. I mean who wouldn’t want to see a 98 year old nun watch her team win it all for the first time. And one of my favorite things about the NCAA tournament is how many crazy prizes are offered every year for someone who completes the proverbial “perfect bracket”, I mean come on. NOBODY HAS DONE THIS, OK!!!! You have a better shot of winning the Powerball than you do getting a perfect bracket! And both of those have some incredibly insane odds. But hey they’re all like religion – you can’t get saved if you don’t play! So seriously stop offering a billion dollars if someone gets a perfect bracket. All you’re doing is just getting our e-mail addresses so you can hawk your crap. Stop it. Just stop it. OK enough of the intro. We got a lot of idiocy to get to. But first you got to see John Oliver’s epic smackdown of Sinclair Broadcasting:

In the first slot this week is Gun Nut Apologists (1). They’re getting desperate folks, and Parkland survivor David Hogg is really getting to them. Taking the second slot this week is Roseanne (2). Yes the star of the hit sitcom revival is a conservative idiot – and has been posting bullshit on Twitter, and attracted the attention of our ratings-obsessed president. In the third slot is said ratings-obsessed president Donald J. Trump (3). Taking the 4th slot this week is also Donald Trump (4) because there was yet another Trump firing. And that means another installment of the Trumper games! Taking the 5th slot, we’ve got a new installment of “People Who Somehow Got Elected” and this week – we’re finally going to add Wisconsin governor Scott Walker (5) to the list! In the 6th slot, is the latest installment of our investigative journalism series “Top 10 Investigates” (6) and this week we’re going to Victorville, California to visit a massive automotive boneyard. And when you find out why it’s there, it’s truly fascinating. Taking the 7th slot, we’ve got of course our weekly sermon of all things holy, Holy Shit (7), and this week, our resident pastor is going to predict the future since Christian republicans have already called the 2020 election! In the number 8 slot this week, we're going to educate you on an insane right wing conspiracy theory known as "The Storm" which has been popping up in the news a lot lately thanks to Roseanne and Sinclair Broadcasting, but what is it? You will soon find out. In the number 9 (NEIN!!!) slot we’ve got a new installment of “I Need A Drink” and this time we’re going to get drunk and discuss one of the more bizarre rules of professional hockey. What other sport has a reserve goalie rule? Well this dude nailed it! And finally this week we’re live from the Gila River Arena in sunny Phoenix, Arizona with Week 3 of Round 1 of our Stupidest State (10) tournament of champions! This time around, the casino moguls in Nevada are going for broke against Koch Industries in Wisconsin, while Florida is bringing their big guns to the dance against Louisiana! Plus we’ve got some live music for you from Portland’s finest, the Decemberists! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

[div style="padding: 20px; background-color: #ffffff; border-radius: 10px; box-shadow: 0px 2px 4px 1px #aaa;"][div style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-weight: bold; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999; padding-bottom: 8px;"]
[font size="8"]Gun Nut Apologists
[br] [/font]

Hey everybody! It’s time for the WHEEL OF CORRUPTION!!! Yay!!!!

Of course you know the rules by now – I spin the wheel and we have to talk about whatever it lands on. Of course if it lands on the guacamole option, you know that it costs $1.50 extra. So here’s what is on the wheel this week:

- Guns
- Abortion
- Crime
- Poverty
- Chance
- 5,000
- Infowars
- Nazis
- Go Directly To Jail
- Buy A Vowel
- North Korea
- Lawsuits
- Whammy
- Donald Trump
- People Are Dumb
- ‘Merica!
- How Is This Still A Thing?
- A Random Tweet
- 10,000
- Community Chest
- Talk Shows
- Clip Without Context
- Something Random In The News
- Fox News
- Top 10 Investigates
- Polls
- Chance
- Nukes
- Protests
- Intermission
- 15,000
- Bankrupt
- Golf
- The GOP
- Butter Beer
- Community Chest
- Florida (Obviously)
- This Fucking Guy
- Beating A Dead Horse
- Holy Shit
- Guacamole ($1.50 Extra)
- Harry Potter
- T-Shirt Cannon
- ? (Mystery Item)
- I Need A Drink
- Lightning Round
- Bonus Spin

Let’s get this going! Spin that shit! Come on no whammy no whammy no whammy stop! And it lands on… clip without context!

There you have it – only in the Trump era could he be giving a speech next to a guy in a giant bunny costume with a shocked look on his face. Spin it again! Guns. Folks. Really, is this where we are at in 2018? Attacking high school students? I mean come on this is fucking insane. The gun nuts just can’t stand that someone is attacking their precious death toys. I’m of course talking about the David Hogg – Laura Ingraham feud. Here’s what happened.

At least 17 major companies have now announced that they are pulling their sponsorship of Laura Ingraham’s Fox News program because of a Wednesday tweet by the anchor widely seen as mocking Parkland, Florida, school shooting survivor David Hogg.

On Friday, Byron Allen’s Entertainment Studios — whose upcoming Teddy Kennedy film “Chappaquiddick” had been promoted frequently during “The Ingraham Angle” in recent weeks — announced on Twitter that it “had pulled all Chappaquiddick ads” from the show.

The studio joined at least eight other companies on Friday in stopping ads on the show after Hogg’s Wesdnesday night call for a boycott of sponsors. Other Friday walkouts included Liberty Mutual, Office Depot, Miracle-Ear, Jenny Craig, Principal investment group, Honda, Ruby Tuesday and Atlantis resort.

That’s right! You don’t insult high school students! Especially someone with a media connection and who was the victim of a mass shooting attack! But Laura Ingraham wasn’t the only conservative attacking David Hogg this week. I give you rock music singer and guy who most likely wears adult diapers, Ted Nugent.

(CNN)National Rifle Association board member and classic rocker Ted Nugent slammed survivors of the Parkland, Florida, school shooting, calling them "liars" and "poor, mushy-brained children."

Nugent made the comments during an interview on "The Joe Pags Show," a nationally syndicated conservative radio program.

"All you have to do now is not only feel sorry for the liars, but you have to go against them and pray to God that the lies can be crushed and the liars can be silenced so that real measures can be put into place to actually save children's lives," Nugent said about the Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School students.

"These poor children, I'm afraid to say this and it hurts me to say this, but the evidence is irrefutable, they have no soul," he added.

Read more: https://www.cnn.com/2018/03/31/politics/nra-member-calls-parkland-survivors-liars/index.html

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! I mean come on Ted, really, you’re calling these kids soulless? Need I remind you of what you did to get out of serving Vietnam?

In a series of tweets on Sunday, Reid recalled that Nugent had defecated in his pants to dodge the draft and had repeatedly been associated with pedophilia.

“Then a week before my physical, I stopped going to the bathroom. I did it in my pants. poop, piss the whole shot. My pants got crusted up,” Nugent told High Times in a 1977 interview. “[T]hey made everybody take off their pants, and I did, and this sergeant says, “Oh my God, put those back on! You fucking swine you!” Then they had a urine test and I couldn’t piss, But my poop was just like ooze, man, so I poop in the cup and put it on the counter. I had poop on my hand and my arm. The guy almost puked. I was so proud. I knew I had these chumps beat.”

After Reid’s mini-tweet storm, she also pointed out Nugent’s history in a segment on MSNBC.

“That is Ted Nugent who in 1977 gave an interview saying he took meth and poohed his pants so he wouldn’t have to go to Vietnam and reportedly adopted a 17-year-old girl so he could have sex with her,” she pointed out.

Yeah that was pretty much my reaction too! And then there was Sylvester Stallone’s brother and last member of Member’s Only, Frank Stallone.

Remember Frank Stallone? He’s the D-list younger brother of Sylvester Stallone who once scored a Top 10 Billboard hit in the ’80s with the ultra-cheesy ‘Far From Over,’which Sly used in his film Staying Alive. Frank was also the subject of a running gag by Saturday Night Live’s Norm McDonald during the ’90s when McDonald hosted Weekend Update.

Well, ol’ Frank is back, and he’s going after Parkland survivors because of course he is.

In a since-deleted tweet, Stallone called David Hogg a “pussy” who is getting “a little big for his britches.” He added that he was sure “someone from his age group is dying to sucker punch this rich little bitch.” Stallone finished off the tweet by claiming Hogg would “run home like the coward he is” and that the high-schooler is the “worst rep for today’s headline grabbing punk.”

This David Hogg pussy is getting a little big for his britches. I’m sure someone from his age group is dying to sucker punch this rich little bitch. Watch him run home like the coward he is . He’s the worst rep for today’s youth headline grabbing punk
— Frank Stallone (@Stallone) March 31, 2018

Read more: https://www.mediaite.com/online/sylvester-stallones-brother-calls-david-hogg-a-pssy-wants-classmates-to-sucker-punch-him/

Oh and in case you’re wondering what kind of society we live in – it’s apparently one that favors guns over, um, lives, apparently.

The NRA saw a major spike in donations following the school shooting in Parkland, Florida.

The shooting took place in February and left 17 people dead. That same month, NRA donations tripled from the month before. Federal Election Commission filings say the NRA received just under $248,000 in January. It received more than $779,000 in February.

The NRA has faced intense scrutiny since the shooting. It's not entirely clear if the donations are part of its supporters' response to that or part of a larger trend. History shows consumers display increased interest in guns and gun sales increase after mass shootings.

Some of that sales bump is likely due to fears the event will prompt stricter gun laws and make it more difficult to purchase a gun.

Oh and it gets worse from there! Some frothing at the mouth gun nut started a website dedicated exclusively to news about David Hogg, apparently so gun nuts could go harass him wherever he follows. Yeah BOOOOOOOOOO!!! Boo, I say! These idiots apparently have a screw loose.

An internet conspiracy theorist tied to Alex Jones has launched a new website dedicated to attacking gun control advocate David Hogg, and claims it’s protected by free speech.

The content on “Hoggwatch.com” features content exclusively related to the 18-year-old Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School Student, who survived the February shooting that killed 17 people.

Many of the articles are written by Mike Adams, the founder of Natural News — a bombastic website seeking to debunk widely accepted scientific theories.

But Hoggwatch.com, which began publishing stories after the Feb. 14 massacre, pushes conspiracy theories that Hogg is a paid actor who wants to shift the American ideology.

Read more: https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/conspiracy-theorist-launches-site-just-to-attack-david-hogg/ar-AAvpyEL?li=BBnbcA1

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[font size="8"]Roseanne
[br] [/font]

Let’s give the wheel a good strong spin shall we? Come on no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop! Sweet, I win 10,000 of something. What that is, we don’t know. Spin it again! and it lands on… Poverty! So folks by now you know that the Roseanne show revival – about a blue collar, working class family that votes against their best interests – premiered to gangbuster ratings, and even got the attention of our ratings-obsessed president. You know that Trump loves him some ratings. “I have the best ratings, OK? I get nothing but 5 stars everywhere I go!”.

When “Roseanne” premiered in 1988, I was among the millions of Americans who tuned in weekly to watch the Conners navigate life in the Midwest. Although I was a kid in Los Angeles, thousands of miles from the fictional Lanford, Ill., the show’s humorous, caustic portrayal of a working-class family struggling to make ends meet resonated with me. In the show, I saw my own family’s quest for the American Dream and how, for many living in poverty, it’s often a dream deferred.

In one of my favorite episodes, Roseanne juggles paying the bills by intentionally putting the wrong check in the wrong envelope and telling the utility company the bill never came. In another, Becky is embarrassed when she learns her mother has taken a job as a shampoo girl to provide for their family. I was Becky, not quite fully grasping that we were poor or that money was in short supply. This was the genius of Roseanne — it transcended race, class and political boundaries while appearing not to do so.

The “Roseanne” reboot, rather than working to bridge the class divide and understanding in America, attempts to insert itself into the current political moment by declaring Roseanne a Donald Trump supporter. After the premiere, Trump even called the real Roseanne to congratulate her on the series reboot.

That was pretty much my reaction to the Roseanne reboot too, sir. So yes you know that our ratings-obsessed president called Roseanne to congratulate her. Which is quite amazing that Trump actually paid a compliment to somebody, we would expect him to do the opposite at this point!

RICHFIELD, Ohio —Unusually quiet for the better part of a week, President Trump let loose Thursday during an infrastructure speech that also featured presidential riffs on the border wall, the Democrats, Syria, trade, North and South Korea ... and Roseanne.

Praising the high viewership for this week's premiere of the revived Roseanne sitcom, starring Trump supporter Roseanne Barr, the president told a group of union workers in Ohio: "Look at her ratings! Look at her ratings!"

Trump trumpeted Barr's show during a speech designed to promote an infrastructure plan based on public-private partnerships and reduced federal regulations.

"We will breathe new life into your very run-down highways, railways and waterways," Trump told supportive union members. "We'll transform our roads and bridges from a source of endless frustration into a source of absolutely incredible pride."

Ah yup! There it is! There’s the Trump we all know! He just can’t stop talking about ratings, can he? I mean they’re yuge! The biggest! Nobody gets better ratings than he does! So what is the real controversy with Roseanne? Why is this show such a big deal in the Trump era? Well…

So it should come as no surprise that the new Roseanne — technically a continuation of the original series, but also a different show in some subtle ways — would reignite this old debate between where Roseanne the actress ended and Roseanne the character began. Except, because this is 2018 and everything eventually turns into a discussion about Donald Trump, the political polarity has been completely flipped. The arguments now are less about Roseanne’s bold examinations of feminism and class both on and offscreen and more about how she’s perhaps the president’s most famous supporter.

These arguments have become a vast, interlocking set of controversies that are impossible to separate, because each is necessary to understand the other. For instance, writing off Roseanne entirely — because it homogenizes Trump supporters as people just worried about their families or the country — misses the ways the series depicts Roseanne as a hectoring bully who convinced her sister, Jackie, not to vote for Hillary Clinton at the last minute. (She voted for Jill Stein instead.) But praising Roseanne as a series about the self-delusions of Trump supporters misses the ways it refuses to talk about the harsh realities of living in Trump’s America for people who aren’t straight and white.

Dude, he seriously smiles like he’s in a doctors office and he gets off on the rectal exam. Yeah just try and contemplate that image for a minute. Go on, I’ll wait! But now let’s take a look at the real Roseanne – the one who you don’t see on TV. This is where the controversy comes in.

Actress Roseanne Barr faced heavy criticism on social media this weekend after posting a tweet apparently indicating support for an online conspiracy theory claiming President Trump is involved in combating a global trafficking ring tied to the "deep state."

In a tweet posted Friday night, the "Roseanne" star alleged that Trump was breaking up human trafficking rings and freeing "hundreds" of children in sex slavery around the world every month.

"President Trump has freed so many children held in bondage to pimps all over this world. Hundreds each month. He has broken up trafficking rings in high places everywhere. notice that. I disagree on some things, but give him benefit of doubt-4 now," the actress wrote.

I’m with the kid on this one. And in case you couldn’t think it could get any more ridiculous, wait until you see who supports Roseanne! And with friends like these, you know, who needs enemies? This was a miracle? I think even Jesus somewhere is giving a facepalm at this one!

Over the weekend, Roseanne Barr posted a tweet praising President Trump for supposedly having “freed so many children held in bondage to pimps all over this world” and “broken up trafficking rings in high places everywhere,” which was a rather confusing statement to anyone not familiar with the right-wing conspiracy theory known as “The Storm.”

Barr’s since-removed tweet was rooted in a fringe right-wing conspiracy theory alleging that the special counsel investigation into Russian interference in the 2016 presidential election is really a cover for Trump’s efforts to take down thousands of corrupt political, business and entertainment leaders who are part of a massive satanic pedophile ring.

Unhinged conspiracy theorist Liz Crokin has been one of the leading voices promoting this conspiracy theory and she was overjoyed with Barr’s tweet, declaring in a video she posted over the weekend that Barr’s tweet was “nothing sort of a miracle.”

“It is just absolutely amazing and it is nothing short of a miracle that Roseanne, with her controversial viewpoints and the fact that she is exposing the deep state child sex trafficking and elite pedophilia, that she has been given this platform,” Crokin said. “I have to pinch myself because I am still finding it hard to believe. It is so amazing for our community.”

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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Let’s spin that shit! Come on no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop! Bankrupt? No!!!!!

Spin it again. And it lands on… Donald Trump. Yes, the president who, if you were to compare him to any James Bond villain, he would be a real life Auric Goldfinger. And he probably would blow up Fort Knox. But let’s think about this here for a minute – He loves gold. He has an insane plan to dominate the world. And he’s been accused of cheating at golf. Yeah he’s a real life Goldfinger all right! So on the eve of the holiday known as Easter, how does Donald J. Trump celebrate the holiest of Saturdays? In the most Donald J. Trump way possible!

President Donald Trump began his morning on Holy Saturday with tweets blasting California Gov. Jerry Brown and Amazon before heading to the golf course.

The president, who is spending the Easter weekend at his Mar-a-Lago residence in Palm Beach, Florida, called Brown “Moonbeam.”

He also slammed the U.S. Post Office and Amazon over postage rates, tweeting that Amazon “must pay real costs (and taxes) now.”

Well, I think it’s safe to say that we all are. But I can guarantee none as shocked as the look on that Easter bunny’s face. I mean can we show that again? I love this so much!

To quote the late great Freddie Mercury – “Is this real life? Or is this just fantasy? Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality”. So now that we got his Easter pre-game party out of the way, how did Trump celebrate the actual Easter? About as well as you can possibly imagine.

President Donald Trump delivered another of his classic campaign rally speeches from the White House this morning, boasting about the economy and his build-up of spending on the military, with a giant pink-eared bespectacled bunny at his side.

Trump’s address was his way of commemorating the 140th annual White House Easter Egg Roll – a tradition that dates back to 1878.

“This is a special year. Our country is doing great. You look at the economy; you look at what’s happening,” Trump told the large gathering of children standing below him on the White House lawn

“Nothing is ever easy but we have never had an economy like we have right now. And we’re going to make it bigger and better and stronger,” he beamed.

Trump also took the moment to assure egg-rollers and their parents, “Our military is now at a level, will soon be at a level, that it’s never been before.

Oh wait, ladies and gentlemen! What’s that? There is some urgent news I have to report here!

Oh and this just in – Trump has told his 1,400th lie since he took office! Ladies and gentlemen, that is the 45th president of these United States! Bravo, take a bow! You know Trump’s lies are like fine wines – each one has its’ own body and character, and they have layers of flavor. You got to give it time to ferment.

The U.S. president has now said 1,400 false things since his inauguration, an average of 3.2 per day.

Speaking in Ohio, President Donald Trump is threatening to "hold up" the trade agreement his administration just finalized with South Korea to provide more leverage for talks with North Korea. (The Associated Press)

WASHINGTON—U.S. President Donald Trump was supposed to give a speech on infrastructure. Instead, he took his audience on a dizzying ramble-journey that covered everything from the war in Syria to the sitcom Roseanne. And he was highly dishonest along the way.

Trump made 16 false claims during the Ohio address. He added five more over the course of the week for a total of 21.

He has made 1,400 false claims over the first 437 days of his presidency, an average of 3.2 per day.

Oh! Oh no he didn’t! He set the fact checker on fire! Oh the humanity!!! I mean could this possibly get any more insane? Only if Trump doubled down on his attacks on Amazon. And he most certainly did, I mean this is Donald Trump we’re talking about here! Forgive our president for he knows not of which he speaks.

President Trump once accused Verizon of making “a STUPID deal” for AOL. He ridiculed Coca-Cola as “garbage” — but said he would keep drinking it. He called both H&R Block and Nordstrom “terrible.” He said Sony had “really stupid leadership” and described executives at S&P Global, a financial firm, as “losers.”

Before and after he became president, Mr. Trump attacked tech firms, military contractors, carmakers, cellphone companies, financial firms, drug companies, air-conditioner makers, sports leagues, Wall Street giants — and many, many media companies, which he has labeled “shameful,” “dishonest,” “true garbage,” “really dumb,” “phony,” “failing” and, broadly, “the enemy of the American people.”

Lately, Mr. Trump’s antibusiness rants have become particularly menacing and caused the stocks of some companies to plunge. His Twitter posts have carried with them the threat, sometimes explicit, that he is prepared to use the power of the presidency to undermine the companies that anger him.

The U.S. Chamber of Commerce, long a booster of Republican presidents, is not happy. “It’s inappropriate for government officials to use their position to attack an American company,” said Neil Bradley, the executive vice president and chief policy officer of the chamber. Mr. Bradley, who did not specifically name Mr. Trump, added that criticism of companies from politicians “undermines economic growth and job creation.”

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[font size="8"]The Trumper Games: MockingTrump Pt. 1
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Let’s spin it to win it! Wheel goes round, wheel goes round, wheel goes round. Oh and it lands on… oh the guacamole option! Come on out here, Fernando! So I got this great plate of chips and salsa, a nice 24 ounce glass of Negra Modelo, and Fernando is coming to prepare my tableside guacamole. Fernando is our sous chef here at the Top 10. Here’s your $1.50 Fernando. OK easy on the onions, not too much tomato. Yeah look at that!

That’s Fernando everybody! All right, spin it again! And it lands on… Donald Trump. Another firing, another week for:

Ah, welcome to yet another edition of the Trumper Games! Happy Trumper Games! So last week if you need a recap – the president eliminated another tribute! Damn it, Charlie! You brought the cheap champagne again, I want the good shit! Last week, the president eliminated Tribute McMaster. This week – the president eliminated another Tribute, this time from District 4. I will be honest, I have no idea how the districts work, I just make them up as I go. This week – the tribute that was eliminated was David Shulkin, the head of the department of Veterans Affairs. As the president would say “You’re fired!”.

WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump fired Veterans Affairs Secretary David Shulkin on Wednesday, ending weeks of speculation about the embattled administrator’s future.

Shulkin’s position in the administration had been in jeopardy since the release of a damning inspector general report last month that criticized him for wasteful and unethical actions during a 10-day official department trip last summer.

In the wake of that report, Shulkin accused subordinates and White House operatives of working to undermine him because of a host of policy disagreements. In recent days, he backed away from promises to purge his department of those enemies and largely avoided the press.

The move leaves the Department of Veterans Affairs — which has a budget of nearly $200 billion and boasts about 360,000 employees — in a state of leadership disarray for the second time in less than four years.

Yes – the president eliminates yet another tribute! That’s 4 tributes in the last 3 weeks! The president is on a roll! And he has done all of them through his favorite method of elimination – the tweet! And remember the rules of the Trumper Games state that anyone can be eliminated at any time, and for any reason! So who did the president replace Tribute Shulkin with?

WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump ousted Secretary of Veterans Affairs David Shulkin on Wednesday, announcing his intent to nominate the White House physician, Adm. Ronny Jackson, to fill the post and ending weeks of speculation about when the embattled cabinet official would leave the administration.

Trump tweeted a confirmation of the news, which was first reported by Reuters. In a statement, the president described Jackson as "highly trained and qualified and as a service member himself." Trump also thanked Shulkin for his service and the "many great things we did together at Veterans Affairs."

Jackson has been a White House physician to Presidents Trump and Barack Obama. Robert Wilkie, an undersecretary of defense, will serve as interim secretary until Jackson is confirmed by the Senate, Trump said in a follow-up tweet.

Yes, my pretties! The president has replaced Tribute Shulkin with Tribute Jackson – yes the very same White House doctor who previously praised Trump’s “very good genes”. Come on, really? This is the guy who gave us Don Jr and Eric! He doesn’t have that great of genes! So what do we know about Tribute Jackson?

Sen. Bernie Sanders wouldn't commit to supporting President Donald Trump's pick to lead the Department of Veterans Affairs, Rear Adm. Ronny Jackson, on Sunday.

In an interview on CBS’ "Face the Nation," the Vermont independent noted that Jackson, Trump's personal physician, is a virtual unknown on veterans issues. He also expressed concerns the Trump administration is pushing to privatize the nearly $200 billion bureaucracy, citing the conservative agenda of the influential donors Charles and David Koch.

"We know nothing about what Dr. Jackson stands for and what his vision is for the VA," Sanders said.

Trump replaced VA Secretary David Shulkin last week after months of criticism over reports he misused government travel. Shulkin has since said he was forced out for pushing back against efforts to privatize veterans services.

That’s right! We know nothing! Only in the most stunningly incompetent of administrations could we replace a tribute with another tribute, and know nothing! This president really… doesn’t know what he is doing! Damn it, Johnny! Keep my champagne refilled! But of course, let the finger pointing and blame gaming begin!

Former Veterans Affairs Secretary David Shulkin is making it clear he was fired from his job amid conflicting claims from the White House.

White House spokeswoman Lindsay Walters on Sunday told The Associated Press that Shulkin had "resigned" from his job when President Donald Trump abruptly announced via Twitter last Wednesday that he was nominating White House doctor Ronny Jackson to replace him.

But in television interviews, Shulkin said he had not submitted a resignation letter, or planned to, and was only told of Trump's decision shortly before the Twitter announcement. He said he had spoken to Trump by phone earlier that day about VA improvements, with no mention of his job status, and was scheduled to meet with the president the next morning.

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[font size="8"] Scott Walker
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Spin it to win it! And it lands on… chance!

Eh, the rest of the players might get $50 each, but I will get stock options worth $500,000,000! Ha! Jokes’ on them! Spin it again! and it lands on… oh People Who Somehow Got Elected! Let’s hit it!

Politicians at national, state and local levels who are so terrible , you wonder how they got elected in the first place. Or in this case reelected. It’s now time for another installment of:

This week – it’s the governor of the state of Wisconsin, Scott Walker. Governor Scott Walker is a byproduct of the Koch Bros / Tea Party craze fueled by a combination of voters fed a diet of hatred on Fox News, and money funded by the Koch Bros. And thanks to the Supreme Court’s controversial Citizens United ruling that allowed unlimited amounts of money to flow into campaigns, and for billionaires to simply buy key positions. Like being the governor of the state of Wisconsin, who was called “a menace to democracy”.

When a judge ordered Gov. Scott Walker to stop messing with Wisconsin democracy and order special elections to be held for a pair of vacant legislative seats, that should have been the end of the governor’s lawless scheming to leave the 229,904 Wisconsinites who live in those districts unrepresented for almost a full year.

Everyone had figured out what Walker was up to. Fearful that special elections might see Democrats elected in the historically Republican 1st Senate District and 43rd Assembly District, Walker simply refused to call the elections after the seats went vacant last year. Walker and his lawyers tried to makes excuses for the governor’s anti-democratic machinations, but Dane County Circuit Judge Josann Reynolds dismissed them as “inconsistent, incompatible and irreconcilable.”

“To state the obvious,” the judge explained, “if the plaintiffs have a right to vote for their representatives, they must have an election to do so.”

Remarkably, the response of Walker and his legislative allies to the judge’s order was not to order the elections — which could have been held in conjunction with the regularly scheduled spring elections if Walker had acted promptly. Instead, they proposed to rewrite state statutes so that governors would no longer be required to call special elections to fill legislative vacancies “as promptly as possible.”

Yes – Scott Walker is so terrible at his job that even leading newspapers in Wisconsin aren’t endorsing his reelection bid. Even the citizens of Wisconsin are under the impression that they are currently without leadership.

MADISON - After a three-month delay, a lightning-quick lawsuit and three orders from as many judges, Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker called two special elections Thursday and GOP senators dropped legislation to block the contests.

Republican efforts collapsed following a Wednesday ruling by an appellate judge ordering the governor to call the May primary and June general elections. In less than a day, Walker abandoned a state Supreme Court appeal to overturn the ruling and lawmakers in both the Senate and Assembly canceled plans to vote to leave the seats vacant.

"This is a victory for the citizens of Wisconsin who are without representation because of Governor Walker's refusal to do his job," said former U.S. Attorney General Eric Holder, whose national Democratic group brought the lawsuit against Walker on behalf of local voters. "Republicans in the Legislature should stop trying to find new ways to keep the people they're supposed to represent from voting."

Wow, even Dirty Harry thinks that Scott Walker sucks. And when he says that Scott Walker sucks, damn it, he means it. But let’s expand on this – Walker originally refused to call the special elections in Wisconsin, and was ordered to by a federal judge. See, the republicans can’t win if they can’t lie, cheat, and steal.

MADISON, Wis. — A Wisconsin judge Thursday ordered Gov. Scott Walker to call special elections to fill a pair of legislative seats vacated by fellow Republicans, handing a victory to Democrats who have pushed for the elections to be held.

A national Democratic group led by former U.S. Attorney General Eric Holder filed the lawsuit on behalf of voters who argued they were disenfranchised by Walker’s decision not to call elections to fill the vacancies that occurred on Dec. 29.

Attorneys for Holder’s groups, the National Redistricting Foundation, argued that Walker has a legal obligation to call special elections as soon as possible. Democrats said the governor is afraid Democrats will win the seats, but Walker contends the lawsuit is a partisan, special interest effort to waste taxpayers’ money and he’s under no legal obligation to hold the elections.

Dane County Circuit Judge Josann Reynolds, whom Walker appointed in 2014, rejected all of his defense arguments in requiring him to issue an order no later than March 29 calling special elections within the next 11 weeks. Reynolds said Walker’s interpretation of the law was inconsistent and incompatible with a strict interpretation of the Constitution, something she noted the conservative governor has long said he adheres to.

Yes there is something rotten in the state of Wisconsin, all right. And that something rotten just happens to be in Madison. In fact the governor and republicans of Wisconsin are so desperate to *NOT* hold an election that they’re resorting to such desperate measures as this.

Gov. Scott Walker and Republican lawmakers are moving quickly to change when special elections must be held in the wake of a court order requiring special elections for two vacant legislative seats.

Dane County Circuit Judge Josann Reynolds — who was appointed to the bench by Walker in 2014 and elected to a six-year term the following year — blistered the governor Thursday for refusing to call the special elections and ordered him to do so within a week.

The Senate and Assembly, which wrapped up their regular session business this week, are planning to meet in extraordinary session to take up a bill that would change the timeline for special elections, according to a statement issued Friday by Senate Majority Leader Scott Fitzgerald, R-Juneau, and Assembly Speaker Robin Vos, R-Rochester.

Walker — even before formal legislation had been made public — said that he would sign the bill.

Yes – and Scott Walker is one of those people who wants to watch the world burn. He would rather hold elections in secret or not hold them at all. Because the republicans can’t win if they can’t lie, cheat, steal, and rig their way to the top, as we have seen time and time again. In fact the GOP is so corrupt in Wisconsin that they wanted to simply eliminate the position of Secretary of The Treasury:

Scott Walker just got called out by a judge he appointed for making up absurd excuses for trampling on the voting rights of Wisconsinites by literally refusing to let them vote. The governor’s rationale for refusing to call special elections to fill vacant state legislative seats was so absurd that Dane County Circuit Judge Josann Reynolds dismissed them as “inconsistent, incompatible and irreconcilable.”

In ordering Walker to call the special elections for the state Assembly and state Senate seats that were vacated when he appointed Republican legislators to his administration, Judge Reynolds saw through the fabric of excuses blocking elections that Republicans might lose and simply declared: “To state the obvious, if the plaintiffs have a right to vote for their representatives, they must have an election to do so.”

Logic tripped Walker up and, thankfully, there was a judge to check and balance the governor’s anti-democratic impulses.

Yes and no one wants to see the world burn more than Scott Walker. And in case you’re wondering why all this is going down in Wisconsin – the GOP is all about protecting “the brand” and “the base”. And it will stop at nothing to do so. So much that their strategy of “all or nothing” is backfiring on them big time!

The risk of losing two seats in the legislature might not be as bad for Wisconsin Republicans as the fallout from attempts to avoid having special elections.

UW-La Crosse political scientist Joe Heim told WIZM that the image of the Wisconsin GOP may suffer over the election fight.

“You think (the GOP was saying), 'Well the courts aren't going to let us do this, they're going to force us to, so we're just going to change the law,’” Heim said. “I think that kind of gives an image of arrogance to the Republican Party.”

There you have it. Scott Walker rigs elections and is more concerned with protecting his brand than his people. That’s Wisconsin governor Scott Walker – another politician to add to the growing list of:

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[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Herbie The Stored Bug
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Let’s give the wheel a nice strong spin shall we? And it lands on… clip without context!

Why don’t you name some, Linda? Go ahead I’ll wait. Spin it again! And it lands on… Top 10 Investigates! It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is: Top 10 Investigates.

Two years ago, Volkswagen got caught up in the middle of one of the worst anti-environmental scandals any automotive manufacturer could have been involved in. So if you need a recap of this scandal, Volkswagen got caught cheating on emissions standards in a massive clusterfuck that nearly broke the company. So what does one do to make it right? They bought back the vehicles that were the victims of this scandal. But what do they do with those vehicles once they bought them back? Well, we go to the California desert – the city of Victorville is the home to a massive automotive boneyard that is visible from space.

Volkswagen has bought back hundreds of thousands of automobiles in the US as a result of the diesel emissions scandal uncovered in 2015. After spending $7.4 billon on the cars so far, where did they end up?

Thousands went to the desert, as these images from near Victorville, California, already known for its graveyard of decommissioned airplanes, show. The cars taken back by VW will either be fixed and returned to customers, resold or destroyed. Over 20,000 vehicles have already been destroyed, Reuters reports.

All told, about 350,000 cars in the US have been reacquired by the German automaker. VW has found 37 sprawling lots across the US, including a disused football stadium in Detroit, for the cars that are still awaiting their fate.

Yes that’s correct – some 350,000 cars are just sitting in a massive boneyard at the Southern California Logistics Airport in Victorville. So where exactly are these vehicles being stored? It’s not just in a boneyard in Victorville, they are all over the country.

Volkswagen has taken parking lots to a whole new level in the United States - and will not be emptying them soon.

Volkswagen AG has paid more than $7.4 billion to buy back about 350,000 U.S. diesel vehicles through mid-February, a recent court filing shows. The German automaker has been storing hundreds of thousands of vehicles around the United States for months.

Volkswagen has 37 secure storage facilities around the United States housing nearly 300,000 vehicles, the filing from the program’s independent administrator said. The lots include a shuttered suburban Detroit football stadium, a former Minnesota paper mill and a sun-bleached desert graveyard near Victorville, California.

VW spokeswoman Jeannine Ginivan said in a statement on Wednesday that the storage facility in Victorville, California, is one of many “to ensure the responsible storage of vehicles that are bought back under the terms of the Volkswagen” diesel settlements.

Yes and that’s exactly what Volkswagen did – they said “fuck this place, let’s put up a parking lot.”. And these parking lots aren’t just massive – they’re visible from space. In fact just do a simple Google Maps search on the Logistics Airport in Victorville – you can see it for yourself. And this is what some might call “vehicular purgatory”. Who we hear are playing Coachella this year. Awesome band.

The desert can play tricks on the eyes, especially when the temperatures hit triple-digits.

But on a cool spring day last week there was no confusing the ocean of cars parked off Adelanto Road and Innovation Way at Southern California Logistics Airport for a mirage. Victor Valley residents have grown accustomed to seeing airliners parked at SCLA over the years, either for storage, painting or other modifications. But row after row of cars? That was something new.

Stirling Development’s Anita Tuckerman confirmed SCLA has become ground zero in Southern California for Volkwagen’s buyback of diesel-powered cars that the company rigged to cheat on emissions tests. Earlier this month, a federal judge ordered Volkswagen to pay a $2.8 billion criminal fine. The company has announced plans to spend another $18.32 billion to rectify everything.

“Stirling has leased them 134 acres,” said Tuckerman, director of Asset Services for Stirling Development. “They can hold 21,000 cars on their current land.”

So this whole fiasco is costing Volkswagen billions of dollars, hundreds of wasted man hours, and the potential to be an environmental disaster worse than the previous environmental disaster. After the first four environmental disasters, is your fifth one free? Is there a rewards program for that?

Across the nation, nearly 300,000 recalled Volkswagens were still in storage at the start of the year at temporary lots like the one adjacent to Pikes Peak International Raceway, according to news agency Reuters.

Volkswagen has not released any updated timetable for the clearance of the remaining “buyback cars” still in storage. The automaker hopes to re-sell the remaining cars either in the U.S. or in foreign markets. Some may get disposed of for scrap parts.

At the makeshift lot next Pikes Peak raceway, hundreds of cars have been moved off site in recent months but thousands more remain. Volkswagen has declined to release the total number of cars in storage at the lot.

Nationally, there are 37 storage lots, according to Reuters, citing an updated report on the automaker’s recall program related to its diesel emissions scandal. The lots include a shuttered suburban Detroit football stadium, a former Minnesota paper mill and an old air field near Victorville, Calif., the news agency said.

Yes, WTF. WTF indeed. This entire thing is proving that it could potentially be an environmental and fiscal disaster. That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

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[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Let’s spin the wheel again shall we? And it lands on… come on no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop! Oh hey look, intermission!

Spin it again! And it’s time for… Holy Shit! Gather around my fair brothers and sisters, it’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened, and it is our weekly duty to remind you that the holiest among us are also the most full of:

So… my fair congregation, I ask you – how does one predict the future? Well that is what my colleagues in the Christian right are doing this week! And I answer you… I don’t even think they know. Can I get an amen on that one? Thank you! Because there are a certain minority of them that are already calling the 2020 election for Donald J. Trump. Even though we haven’t even hit the primary season yet! Here is one such individual who is already predicting the future !

Frank Amedia, the tsunami-stopping pastor who served as a volunteer “Christian policy liaison” for Donald Trump’s presidential campaign before launching his POTUS Shield effort, appeared on Jim Bakker’s program today, where he prophesied that President Trump will win re-election in 2020.

Amedia recounted how God had told him weeks before the 2016 election that Trump would win and then gave him the assignment on election night to launch POTUS Shield in order to “put up a line of defense and call My prophets to go forth” to wage spiritual warfare on behalf of the president.

After recounting the history and purpose of POTUS Shield, Amedia revealed that God had given him permission to declare that Trump will be re-elected in 2020.

“I wasn’t allowed to release it until today,” Amedia said. “I have been holding it in my heart for several months, I think I shared it with a few of my people and that’s it. Donald Trump will be the next president of the United States again in 2020. I think you feel the power of God releasing on that.”

So there you have it, my religious brothers are already calling the 2020 election for President Trump, and the race hasn’t even begun yet! Donald could still get primaried! So here is why GAWD is saying that Trump is the man for 2020! According to Brother Jim, GAWD is just using him!

On his television program today, End Times prepper pastor Jim Bakker declared that support for President Trump is a test from God of one’s faith in Him.

“Do you know why church people and millions of other people do not understand Donald Trump, that God could use him?” he asked. “They don’t know God. They don’t know God. They don’t know this book [the Bible] one iota.”

“He used the unlovely, He used the unacceptable, He used the people that no one would vote for,” Bakker continued. “We don’t get God. God uses the impossible.”

“He picked a president,” Bakker added. “He is testing; your evaluation of Almighty God is going on. God picks the unusual. God picks the one that no one else would pick.”

And there you have it folks – Brother Jim is saying that god is testing you. You know if this is god’s will, and I’m sure it is, then what’s Satan’s will? That question has yet to be answered! But in predicting the future, one must pass the test, and one must protect thyself! Which is why you NEED lots of firepower!

Chuck Baldwin, a right-wing pastor and radio host who was the 2008 Presidential nominee of the Christian Reconstructionist Constitution Party, appeared on Sheila Zilinsky’s podcast over the weekend, where he declared that any Christian who does not own the equivalent of an AR-15 assault rifle “has denied the Christian faith” and is “worse than a heathen.”

Citing a passage from 1 Timothy, Baldwin asserted that every adult has “a duty to provide for your family, but you cannot provide protection for your family without being equipped to do so.”

“Therefore, you must have the means of self-defense,” Baldwin said. “And in our society today, that means a firearm in the similitude of an AR-15. Without that, you are not in a position, you are not even able to protect not just your family and your house, but your neighbors, your community around you; that we, as a community of people—that’s the militia—are given the God-given responsibility to protect our communities. That is a biblical requirement.”

Baldwin called on pastors to preach sermons telling their congregations that “if you are not prepared to defend your family and your neighborhood and your community with the force of arms, you have denied that Christian faith and you are worse than a heathen.”

So, my fair congregation, you must have guns, and you must be prepared to have your faith be tested by the LAWRD OUR GAWD!!!! For he is testing you at all times. He might be testing you right now by making you listen to my shit! Hey, we don’t know! In order to predict the future, one must be armed, and one must be mind fucked on a daily basis! But… what else are we forgetting? Well we wlll need shelter because apparently an environmental apocalypse is coming!

Ralph Drollinger, the man who leads weekly Bible study meetings for members of Congress and Trump’s Cabinet—including embattled Environmental Protection Agency head Scott Pruitt—distributed on Monday a Bible study warning that America is in the process of shifting from Christianity to the “false religion of Radical Environmentalism.” Pruitt told CBN last year that it was “wonderful” to participate in the Cabinet Bible studies.

Drollinger’s weekly written Bible studies (also available online in print and audio versions) are distributed to public officials by Capitol Ministries, which is expanding in the U.S. and globally. Drollinger, who sometimes describes them as a kind of a homework supplement to the in-person Bible study meetings, told a reporter last year that Trump reads the studies and sends him positive hand-written notes about them.

The study posted on Monday, “Coming to Grips with the Religion of Environmentalism,” appears to be an updated version of a previous written study with the same title. It draws heavily on a passage in the biblical book of Genesis in which God grants mankind dominion over the Earth and all its creatures and instructs man to rule and subdue creation.

Yes, I think even JAYSUS is speechless at this one because you can’t predict the future. I mean you simply can’t! And I hope that’s the takeaway you get from today’s sermon. Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]The Storm
[br] [/font]

Spin it to win it! Wheel goes ‘round, wheel goes ‘round… and it lands on, oh clip without context!

Uh huh, sure, Jim. Tell us more! How many supplements did you need to sell? Go on I can wait. Spin it again! and it lands on… Conspiracy Theories! You know we were originally going to do a “This Fucking Guy” segment here. But I couldn’t find enough information. But I did find a ton about “The Storm” so that’s what we’re going to talk about here. Do you all know what “The Storm” is? It’s one of the most baseless, bullshit conspiracy theories out there. And it’s quite insane. It is essentially Pizzagate 2.0, and we all know how crazy Pizzagate was. So before we get into it, what is “The Storm”?

A new conspiracy theory called “The Storm” has taken the grimiest parts of the internet by, well, storm. Like Pizzagate, the Storm conspiracy features secret cabals, a child sex-trafficking ring led (in part) by the satanic Democratic Party, and of course, countless logical leaps and paranoid assumptions that fail to hold up under the slightest fact-based scrutiny. However, unlike Pizzagate, the Storm isn’t focused on a single block of shops in D.C., or John Podesta’s emails. It’s much, much bigger than that.

As most terrible things do, this story begins with a post on /pol/, a sub-board of the more-or-less-anonymous, anything-goes website 4chan. Over the last few years, /pol/ — which technically stands for “politically incorrect” — has slowly but surely become a top contender for the ever-coveted title of the most upsetting community online. It’s the sort of place where neo-Nazis and people who believe women shouldn’t have basic human rights used to meet before we started verifying them on Twitter and electing them to public office. And as of late, it’s expanded its ranks to include fringe members of all shapes and sizes.

Yes like all bad ideas this one originated from 4chan by the famed anonymous poster known as Q. Boy wouldn’t it be great to unmask Q and find out who Q really is? And they would have got away with it too if it weren’t for those meddling kids! But the Storm was in the news a lot this week and it mainly has to do with Roseanne. But there is more to this than you would think. So QAnon attempted a 24 hour meme war that backfired on them big time.

Conspiracy theorists tapped in to “The Storm” have declared today to be the day in which they “post a continuous barrage of memes” in order to prepare the nation for the release of a video that they believe will serve as the “nail in many coffins” for liberal politicians who are involved in a massive alleged pedophile cult.

The Storm is a conspiracy theory that has captured the imaginations of “Pizzagate” truthers who believe that the highest ranking liberal political and business leaders are engaged in a secret satanic pedophile ring dedicated to trafficking and abusing children. At the helm of The Storm sits an anonymous poster on 4chan and then 8chan message boards known only as “Q.” Many followers of The Storm believe “Q” to be a high-ranking government official whom President Trump has ordered to leave cryptic clues—dubbed “crumbs” by conspiracy theorists—about supposed behind-the-scene efforts to unravel the alleged pedophile ring. An archive site of QAnon posts has documented nearly 1,000 cryptic messages since late October of last year.

Since the theory began in October, hordes of people have been engaged with it. YouTube videos about “QAnon” regularly rack up hundreds of thousands of views. The most dedicated participants in the conspiracy theory, including Infowars Washington bureau chief Jerome Corsi, spend hours per day in Discord chat rooms attempting to decode posts written by “Q.”

Now, these activists believe they have been ordered by Trump to “set the stage” for the impending release of a video concerning Hillary Clinton that they say will contain footage that is “impossible to defend” and will lead to the undoing of the liberal elite.

What “undoing” left of the “liberal elite” is there left to do? You’ve already undone everything and about 90% of the progress Obama made in his 8 years in office. How much more damage are you threatening to do? Blame us for terrorist attacks? Yeah! But you know what? We got him!

Participants in the ongoing conspiracy theory known as “The Storm,” which alleges that President Trump is working to take down a massive elite satanic pedophile ring, believe that the main subject of their theory—an anonymous 8Chan user dubbed “Q”—is being targeted by the FBI.

Early this morning, “Q,” who some conspiracy theorists are convinced is a high ranking White House official, claimed that the FBI was opening a case on him or her in relation to the recent series of bombings in Austin, Texas, because of a number of “Q” posts that contain the phrase “BOOM.” “They are scared … They will fail. We know the details” the post reads:

The user “Q” is the figurehead of a larger conspiracy theory known online as “The Storm.” According to advocates of “The Storm,” Special Counsel Robert Mueller is not actually investigating President Trump and his associates for possible collusion with Russian officials during the 2016 election, but rather is working for Trump to dismantle a satanic pedophile ring involving global elites.

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[font size="8"]I Need A Drinkl
[br] [/font]

Let’s spin the wheel again shall we? And it lands on… come on no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop! Clip without context!

Well, sir, we’re going to need divine intervention to get us through the next two years. Spin it again! And it lands on… oh hey I need a drink!

Yes and I need a drink this week. So tell me bartender, what goes well with a cross check? Molson lager? We can’t get that here in the States. I’ll just take a large IPA thanks. In case you don’t know what we’re talking about – we’re going to discuss one of the strangest rules in any sport that got national and international attention last week. I’m of course talking about the NHL’s reserve goalie rule.

Chicago Blackhawks goalie Collin Delia was injured in Thursday night's game against the Winnipeg Jets and the team needed to call on 36-year-old goalie Scott Foster to make his NHL debut as the emergency back-up.

Delia, making his first NHL start, was helped off the ice with an apparent lower-body injury in the third period. He was filling in for starter Anton Forsberg, who was injured during warmups. The team's No. 1 goalie Corey Crawford has been on injured reserve since late December.

Foster only found out he was dressing as the backup "moments before game."

"The initial shock happened when I had to dress," Foster told media. "I think I blacked out after that."

Foster took the ice wearing No. 90. He finished the night with seven saves on seven shots—including one on sniper Patrik Laine—in 14:01 of ice time and was named the game's No. 1 star for his efforts in the Blackhawks' 6-3 win.

OK that dude is definitely way more of a bad ass than you or I will ever be. I mean come on, his first time playing in a professional hockey game and he fucking nailed it. You can’t get more awesome than that, can we? Well what is the reserve goalie rule? Let’s explore that a bit further.

An NHL team only has two goalies, the starter and his reserve, on its playing roster at any given time, but the league mandates that a third, last-resort option be present at every home game. To become eligible, all the EBUG has to do is sign a one-day amateur tryout contract. The opportunity comes with no compensation, but the backups get to watch the game and will often get a free meal out of it.

Rule 5.3 of the NHL rulebook reads:

In regular League and Playoff games, if both listed goalkeepers are incapacitated, that team shall be entitled to dress and play any available goalkeeper who is eligible. This goalkeeper is eligible to sit on the player’s bench, in uniform. In the event that the two regular goalkeepers are injured or incapacitated in quick succession, the third goalkeeper shall be provided with a reasonable amount of time to get dressed, in addition to a two-minute warm-up.

Perhaps it is a testament to the durability of NHL players, but an EBUG rarely has to do so much as look up from his free dinner, let alone actually suit up and prepare to be called onto the ice. In 2009, a college drama student put on pads for the Edmonton Oilers after an injury to one of their rostered goaltenders. In 2008, the Washington Capitals asked their website editor to sit on the bench. In 2011, the Minnesota Wild signed a 51-year-old embroidery shop owner to a one-day contract after its starting goalie had to attend the birth of his child and the team’s minor-league reserve couldn’t make it to the stadium in time. None of those guys had to actually play, however.

Yeah so that happened. And man it was quite a sight to behold. In fact this rule is actually making talks in other sports. I mean imagine if baseball had this rule!

On Thursday evening, Scott Foster was an Oak Park, Ill. accountant and recreational hockey goalie whose last competitive action came during his senior year at Western Michigan University in 2005-06. By the time the Chicago Blackhawks finished their 6–2 win over the Winnipeg Jets on Thursday night, Foster had made his NHL debut, stopped seven shots and allowed zero goals in 14 minutes of action. A codicil in the NHL collective bargaining agreement specifies that an emergency goalkeeper can enter a game for either team in the event that both active goalies get injured. On Thursday, the Blackhawks lost starting goalie Anton Forsberg to injury in warmups and backup Collin Delia, who was making his NHL debut, with 14 minutes remaining. That forced Foster, who finished his day as an accountant just hours earlier, to finish the game. Now, Foster is the talk of the sports world and an instant folk hero.

The emergency backup goalie rule usually puts unsuspecting people—coaches who were once NHL goalies, former professionals—into the thrilling if terrifying scenario of entering a NHL game. Foster's perfect outing assures that he'll finish his NHL career with a 1.000% save percentage.

While you may think Scott Foster is an isolated incident and he’s definitely an anomaly in this world of hockey, he most definitely isn’t! in fact this isn’t the first time hockey has had to enact this controversial rule. In fact there’s other times that hockey has had this happen, and I am definitely going to need more beer!

Eric Semborski was coaching youth hockey players at the Philadelphia Flyers training facility Saturday morning, a rink where he’d interacted occasionally with NHL players in Voorhees, N.J., when he got the call.

A series of events had taken place earlier that would result in the 23-year-old former college club goalie becoming an NHL player himself. Semborski was pulled aside by his boss and found himself talking to a representative of the Flyers.

“He started taking down my player history,” Semborski told USA TODAY Sports. “Then he said the Blackhawks would need a goalie in a couple hours and to go home and get my gear. It’s not something I ever thought about.

"To go from club hockey to the Wells Fargo Center? I dreamt about being in the NHL as a kid, but I knew it was never going to happen.”

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[font size="8"]Stupidest State Contest: Round 1 Week 3
[br] [/font]

Let’s give the wheel a spin one final time this week. And it lands on… t-shirt cannon! Everyone in the audience will get the new 2018 Stupidest State t-shirt. Now if only I had the budget to make and sell t-shirts. Well, when you have a budget of 0, well, you know… Spin it again! Stupidest State contest! Hit it!

16 states will enter, but only one will be crowned the new Top 10 Conservative Idiots Stupidest State!

Welcome back! I hope you all filled out your brackets! This We have not one, but two exciting matchups this week! Last week – we had a huge upset in the tournament brewing as perennial favorite Kansas was knocked off by a young upstart, and red hot West Virginia in the fight for Fiscal Irresponsibility superiority. Meanwhile, in the Family Values conference, Alabama – though they may have been weakened because of the Roy Moore election, showed Indiana who’s boss in an absolutely epic showdown of who worships Jesus the most. This week we’re live from the Gila River Arena in Phoenix, Arizona, where we’ve got a pair of exciting matchups for you! This week, a young, upstart Nevada team looks to go for broke against conference favorite Wisconsin, while Florida brings their big guns to the dance against conference newcomer Louisiana! Let’s get out our brackets so you can follow along!

[font size="6"]Match 1: Fiscal Irresponsibility Conference: Nevada Vs Wisconsin [/font]

[font size="4"]Nevada[/font]

Welcome to Nevada everybody! Of course we were here last week broadcasting our Stupidest State contest live from the beautiful new T-Mobile Arena that’s right off Las Vegas Blvd, better known as “The Strip”. Of course everyone knows the Strip – it’s the only place in the entire world where you can experience what it’s like to live like a baller in the best suites at the MGM Grand and Caesar’s Palace, and you can go from that to living like the homeless. Just put it all on 36 Black. But Nevada is also home to the University of Nevada and the newest NHL franchise, the Las Vegas Golden Knights, and they are the future home of the Las Vegas Raiders. But what else is Nevada the home of? Campaign finance scandals! Of course every state has those, but nobody is greedier than Nevada!

Democrats are accusing former U.S. Rep. Cresent Hardy — who has filed to run for Nevada’s 4th Congressional District, the seat he won in 2014 — of using nearly $4,000 of campaign funds for personal use.

The 11 expenditures in question span Jan. 3 to Aug. 8 of last year, after Hardy had left office. The Republican lost his 2016 re-election bid to Democratic Rep. Ruben Kihuen. Federal election laws prohibit the personal use of leftover campaign funds but allow officeholders six months to spend the money on “winding down” the office.

Campaign finance filings show Hardy spent $395 on an Alamo rental car, $210 at The Orleans, $297 at Hotels.com, $788 on airfare and nearly $80 for phone and internet services with Cox Communications.

“This is potentially more troubling evidence of Cresent Hardy’s history of shady dealings to line his own pockets,” said Drew Godinich, a spokesman for the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee. “We deserve leaders who put the needs of Nevada first, instead of themselves.”

Read more: https://www.reviewjournal.com/news/politics-and-government/nevada/democrats-accuse-nevadas-hardy-of-misusing-campaign-funds/

And then Nevada is also the home of a guy named Steve Wynn, whose giant Wynn Casino is directly across Las Vegas Blvd from Trump tower, and he is embattled in a sex scandal of his own, and just like Trump – treats his workers like shit.

Steve Wynn is under siege. The casino magnate is facing a range of allegations—from sexual harassment to forced sex—from former female employees, according to The Wall Street Journal. Then on Saturday, Republican National Committee Chair Ronna Romney McDaniel announced she had accepted Wynn’s resignation as the RNC’s finance chair. Wynn called the claims of assault “preposterous” in a statement, but the board of directors of Wynn Resorts has formed a committee of independent directors to investigate the allegations in the article.

But there’s no indication that President Donald Trump is moving to sever ties with his fellow mogul. Trump loves people who flatter him, and Wynn flatters him profusely. In other words, Wynn may be the most controversial example of Trump’s insistence on surrounding himself with successful businessmen despite the baggage they bring—but he’s also part of a larger pattern.

The close relationship between the two men is a recent development. During the Republican primary, Senator Ted Cruz met privately with Wynn to discuss a potential endorsement when he was in Las Vegas for a primary debate, in December of 2015. Wynn, whose net worth Forbes estimates at $3.5 billion, had given money to Cruz in the past, and the Texas lawmaker’s team hoped to score his official imprimatur.

[font size="4"]Wisconsin [/font]

Wisconsin. You know Wisconsin. It’s the state that has given us the Lambeau Leap, the Green Bay Packers, the University Of Wisconsin, and the cheese head. It’s also given us the current speaker of the House & rejected spokesmodel for Axe Body Spray, Paul Ryan. It’s also given us the guy who we profiled earlier in “People Who Somehow Got Elected”, Scott Walker. And Scott Walker has enacted and enabled some policies that the residents of Wisconsin aren’t well, let’s say less than pleased with.

STEVENS POINT - A University of Wisconsin-Stevens Point spokeswoman said Wednesday that university leaders have tasked a committee to create a new proposal aimed at limiting cuts to humanities majors.

The action by the university's common council comes after roughly 300 people on March 21 staged a sit-in of the Old Main building to protest a proposal by the university that would cut 13 humanities majors. The proposal has been met with backlash and has garnered national attention.

At the student-led protest, students delivered to the chancellor and the administration a letter asking the university to create a second proposal.

"In response to a request from students and alumni who organized a sit-in on campus March 21, the UW-Stevens Point Common Council has asked its Academic Affairs Committee to serve as a task force to write a counter-proposal for addressing fiscal challenges, one that particularly preserves our existing humanities majors," said Nick Schultz, a UW-Stevens Point spokesperson, in an email Wednesday evening.

Yes that’s just at the collegiate level. The Kochs aren’t afraid of screwing over anybody and anything they damn well please. Because that’s what closet backdoor dictators do. And then there’s this.

Now that he's running for re-election in what could be a tough political year for Republicans, he proposed and the Legislature approved a $639 million increase in K-12 funding for 2017-19 -- the largest increase, he brags, in the state's history. ...........................................Forget about that $1.8 billion cut. Walker will trumpet the "largest education increase in history." Very clever indeed.

Then, there's the Affordable Care Act. From the day Walker took office, he's done his best to sabotage Obamacare. He was one of several Republican governors to turn down federal dollars to expand Medicaid, a feature of the ACA aimed at lowering premiums. He bad-mouthed everything about it and backed the "repeal and replace" Republicans. When Donald Trump became president, he cheered when Trump signed executive orders to undermine the insurance exchanges and create uncertainty in the marketplace, all combining to raise rates.

But as election time nears, Walker has suddenly seen the light. Like a gallant knight riding to the rescue, he now hopes to be seen as a savior, putting aside $200 million to stabilize the market for those who use the insurance exchange in Wisconsin. Seventy-five percent of the costs, incidentally, will be picked up by the federal government, which he found untenable only a few years ago.................

[font size="6"]And The Winner Is… [/font]

Sorry Nevada, you may be casino evil and have mobsters and gangsters in your back pocket, but no one out greeds Wisconsin. I mean come on this is the state that elected and reelected Scott Walker, and tried to actively suppress the vote. Wisconsin handily wins 79 – 64. They will move onto the next round.

[font size="6"]Match 2: Gun Nut Conference: Florida Vs. Louisiana[/font]

[font size="4"]Florida[/font]

Ah, Florida. The home of Florida Man. You know we could just sit here and literally all day post meme after meme and story after story about how batshit crazy Florida is. But since the last tournament, they left the Batshit conference because as it turns out – Florida has some of the country’s worst gun laws. It’s also the home of another Koch backed governor – Rick Scott. And since the Parkland shooting, Rick Scott has spent an awful lot of time in the spotlight – and time he doesn’t want. Since the Parkland shooting, it’s all been completely insane.

The pro-Second Amendment right wing officially broke its brain last month. Instead of civilly disagreeing with the Parkland-surviving teens who organized the March for Our Lives, Breitbart has accused David Hogg of giving a Nazi salute (didn't happen), commentators and sitting lawmakers have utterly misrepresented Cuban politics and accused Emma Gonzalez of supporting the Castro regime, the Daily Wire wrote an article making fun of David Hogg's actually very-good 4.2 grade-point-average, and social-media users have spread all sorts of memes comparing school-shooting survivors to Hitler.

Did you assume that photoshopping Hogg's face onto the body of a Hitler Youth member was the lowest the public discourse about this could go? Think again! A burgeoning take on right-wing pockets of social media seems to be that the Parkland kids actually caused the Stoneman Douglas massacre by bullying poor, poor Nikolas Cruz.

To be clear: There's little evidence that Cruz was bullied. Douglas students have consistently described Cruz as a frightening individual that most people steered clear from, and he was evaluated multiple times for psychiatric issues and threats of violence.

And even if any students bullied someone, that doesn't give anyone the right to walk into a school with an assault rifle and murder people. The meme here seems to stem from one of Gonzalez's speeches, where she says she and others "ostracized" Cruz — but the clip is ripped out of context and she is very clearly explaining that Cruz's actions (threatening others, taking tons of photos of his guns, drawing swastikas on his belongings) terrified people and made them want to avoid him.

Read more: http://www.miaminewtimes.com/news/right-now-blaming-parkland-teens-for-bullying-nikolas-cruz-10221533

Yes – what more American thing to do than to blame the victims for being in harms’ way? That’s all we do as a country, because, reasons. And how does Rick Scott respond? Armed guards in schools! Because, guns!

The Florida House spent nearly seven hours Tuesday debating a four-point school safety plan. The final vote on the proposal could come Wednesday.

The debate covered 37 amendments filed by Democrats. Another 41 amendments were withdrawn from consideration.

Before the House began consideration of a Senate proposal that puts guns in the hands of school employees, Rep. Jared Moskowitz, D-Coral Springs, put his colleagues on notice.

"By the time we are through everyone will know where everyone stands on the marshal program," he said.

Read more: https://www.tallahassee.com/story/news/2018/03/06/house-poised-pass-school-marshal-plan-votes/400847002/

[font size="6"]Louisiana[/font]

Loooooooooooooosiana, as it’s called by the advertisements for its’ home state fast food chain Popeyes, is a state we have not covered yet. It’s home to such world class universities as Tulane University. It’s also the home of the New Orleans Pelicans and all the creepy and weird mascots that team has produced. But the city of New Orleans itself is creepy, weird, and utterly fascinating as it’s the home of Mardi Gras – a celebration of life and, well, let’s be honest, public drunkenness. It’s also the home of Koch backed governor Bobby Jindal (state now run by a dem- Jon Bel Edwards). Who again has enacted some of the worst gun laws in the country.

A judge ruled Thursday that a Louisiana law prohibiting felons from carrying firearms was in violation of a recently ratified constitutional amendment, according to The Times-Pacayune.

“The courts cannot question the wisdom of fundamental law and frustrate the will of the people; their function is to interpret and apply that law,” he wrote. “After reviewing the law and applying a strict scrutiny standard, the Court finds La R.S. 145.1 unconstitutional in its entirety.”

Louisiana voters approved a constitutional amendment last November to subject any gun law to the highest standard of scrutiny by a court, a level of judicial review that few laws pass. Chris W. Cox, executive director of NRA’s Institute for Legislative Action, boasted that no state “has passed a right to keep and bear arms constitutional amendment as strong as Louisiana’s.”

Yes they take the phrase “keep and bear arms” just a little too literally. And with hardcore guns as you know, comes hardcore racism! Yes, the two often go hand in hand but not like in Looosiana. Cases like this:

Eight alleged members or associates of a white supremacist prison gang called the Aryan Circle have been indicted in Louisiana on federal charges in the 2016 killing of a fellow alleged member of the gang.

Court records unsealed on Tuesday show Jeremy Wade Jordan, 38, of Orange, Texas, pleaded guilty on March 2 to the first of two counts in his indictment. The first count in his Dec. 14 indictment charged Jordan with "violent crimes in aid of racketeering" in the murder of Clifton Hallmark in Evangeline Parish.

Jordan, whose case had remained under seal since December, is scheduled to be sentenced on June 18.

A separate indictment, also unsealed Tuesday, charges seven other people -- residents of Louisiana, Texas, Oklahoma or Arkansas -- with being accessories after the fact to the slaying. The two-page indictment, handed up last Thursday, says they helped Jordan "in order to hinder and prevent his apprehension, trial and punishment."

Read more: http://www.nola.com/crime/index.ssf/2018/03/8_indicted_in_white_supremacis.html

[font size="6"]And The Winner Is… [/font]

Oh man this was a close one. Looooooooosiana was the favorite here, but Florida completely routed them by a whopping 30 points. Florida wins and ironically celebrates by eating Popeye’s chicken. The final score is 99 – 67. Florida Man was on his A game this week and sharp shot his way to the top.

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

Next week we’re live at the home of the Los Angeles Chargers, Stub Hub Center, and it’s the final week of Round 1 and we’ve saved the best for last as last year’s world champion Texas goes batshit crazy against red hot Virginia, while the Mormons of Utah duke it out in a Family Values face off against the child brides of Missouri!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]The Decemberists[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen, my next guest has a great new album called “I’ll Be Your Girl” and they are going to be seen on tour everywhere in March and April. Playing their song “Severed”, give it up for the Decemberists!

See you next week!


Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: City National Grove Of Anaheim, Anaheim, CA
Special Thanks To: City National Grove Management
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The Decemberists appear courtesy of: Capitol Records
Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

March 28, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-11: Run The Jewels Live From Uranus Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #4-11: Run The Jewels Live From Uranus Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! Just 15 minutes at our website can save you $650 or more on your car insurance! Stop by today and save! How is it going everybody? I want to start with some great news this week before we get to the crazy shit. I’m of course talking about the Final Four. Did your bracket get busted early like mine did? Yeah I think we all did. You know what? But one of the more interesting story lines to come out of the Final Four this year is Loyola-Chicago. Did anyone have them making it as far as they did? I know I didn’t! I mean talk about a Cinderella run! The reason I’m bringing this up is because I want to talk about the chaplain of Loyola Chicago’s basketball team – Sister Jean. Who is 98 years old. I mean wow, that is definitely something. And Sister Jean has been called the team’s good luck charm. And here’s how awesome Sister Jean is. So Loyola has done that thing called “merchandising” and has immortalized the 98 year old nun in the form of bobbleheads, t-shirts and other crap. But you know what? Being the good nun that she is, Sister Jean decided that she doesn’t want a dime from it. I mean come on, how can you *NOT* root for Loyola Chicago at this point? I know that we will be. And especially since next week’s Top 10 will take place after the championship has been crowned. Oh and here’s my favorite part of the whole Sister Jean story – someone asked her what she gave up for Lent. And her answer? Losing! That alone wins this year’s NCAA tournament! I love Sister Jean so much! So we will definitely keep an eye on this story! OK enough of the intro – we got a lot of idiocy to get to this week! But first Bill Maher is back and he explains exactly the problem with conservatives talking trash about Hollywood and celebrities:

Taking the number one slot this week is that when a major protest happens, we have to cover it, and we’ll be showing you some of the best signs and some of the crazier news that came out of Saturday’s “March For Our Lives” protest. In the second slot this week is of course Donald J. Trump, and yes, we have to cover the Stormy Daniels interview. Get your barf bags ready. Taking the third slot – is another edition of “The Trumper Games” and this week – another tribute has been eliminated and replaced with someone much scarier! So taking the fourth slot this week is the NRA and they were trying to do some serious damage control in the wake of Saturday’s rally and well, failed big time. Especially when Killer Mike of Run The Jewels got involved. In the number 5 slot this week is our weekly sermon of all the wacky things the Christian right is up to in “Holy Shit”, and this week, our resident pastor is going to do a deep dive into the world of Christian cinema. And yes, it’s more than just that Mercy Me flick. Taking the sixth slot we have a new edition of our ongoing series “Top 10 Investigates” and this time we’re going to say goodbye to the biggest toy store there is – or was – Toys R Us. So why are they going under? We shall investigate! At number 7, Alex Jones (7) has what may be one of his most batshit theories to date, and that’s saying a lot! Taking the 8th slot this week is the comeback of the 90’s classic TV show Roseanne (8). Did you know that her character came out as a full blown conspiracy theory Trump supporter? Yeah that happened. Don’t call it a comeback! In the number 9 (NEIN!!!) slot we’ve got a new installment of “People Are Dumb” because, well, people are dumb. And finally this week we’re live from the beautiful T-Mobile Arena in Las Vegas with Week 2 of Round 1 of our Stupidest State tournament of champions! This time around, Kansas is going for broke against West Virginia, while Indiana plays the Jesus card against Alabama in a Family Values face off, who will emerge the winner? And ending the show, we’ve got one of the great 90s bands that is back with a new lineup and a new album – I’m of course talking about San Diego’s legendary Stone Temple Pilots! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]March For Our Lives Recap
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This week thousands of people took to the streets to demand a change in our nation’s lax gun laws. And just like the previous marches, it is our mission here at the Top 10 to give you our personal take on it. There are multiple ways you could go with this. I could just sit here and post some of the funny and clever signs that people made – and there were some great ones! Or I could show you some of the ways conservatives reacted. Or I could do all of the above! So of course the right wing was up to their usual nonsense of calling out George Soros and comparing people like David Hogg to Adolf Hitler. Sigh, these morons are why we can’t have nice things!

Right-wing activists and media figures went all-out in their attacks on the March for Our Lives gun reform rallies on Saturday, including attacking the rallies’ funding and organization, blaming “political correctness” and comparing Marjory Stoneman Douglas high school shooting survivor David Hogg to Adolf Hitler.

Hundreds of thousands of people gathered in Washington, D.C., and in cities across the country to call for stricter gun laws and call out politicians who have received funding and support from the National Rifle Association. Polling shows that most Americans support the march’s calls for gun reform.

Predictably, right-wing pundits went after billionaire George Soros—conservative activists’ favorite bogeyman—in an effort to minimize the legitimacy of the protests. Breitbart radio host Joel Pollak said it was “no surprise” that the march was a “Soros production.” The site’s sports editor Dylan Gwinn said that “we all know that these kids are being coached.”

Conspiracy theorist Alex Jones said that teenager-led March for Our Lives marches were “scripted and funded by the Democrats” and said that the “welfare queens” attending the rallies “all look mentally ill.” Infowars editor-at-large Paul Joseph Watson wrote that the “real agenda” behind the March for Our Lives rallies was “the end of the Second Amendment, by force if necessary.”

Feeding into the claims that the march had been orchestrated by liberal mega-donors, Pro-Trump media troll Jack Posobiec live-streamed video of the buses that some activists had used to travel to D.C., reporting on the shocking detail that organizers had coordinated with security staff to park the buses in a secure area. He encouraged viewers to call the companies that owned the buses to find out who had hired them.

Seriously, you guys are fighting HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS. Let that sink in – these kids are barely old enough to vote and they have to deal with you douchebags? Fuck off! So now we’re going to show you some of the best signs from the rally. And here we go!

So then there’s more. Because of course there is. And leave it to Fox to stoop to the new low of Fox turning this into an attack on the 2nd amendment.

The night before the March for Our Lives, Fox News pundit Tucker Carlson argued that we shouldn’t be listening to the logic of teenage gun control activists who organized the march. Then he vocalized the exact anxiety of gun rights groups:

Journalists agree with Emma Gonzalez and David Hogg, so they’ve slapped them on the cover of Time magazine and declared that they’re heroes and you’re not allowed to disagree with them.

Carlson articulated exactly why Fox News was on its heels. The network has generally been critical of this gun control debate and the teenage activists behind it. But it couldn’t ignore the massive amount of attention this march was getting, nor could it outright loudly disagree with their message while hundreds of thousands of people marched on Washington.

So there was a tightrope Fox News had to walk while covering this march. And it did so by finding ways to reframe the images of these huge and passionate crowds.

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! Seriously, fuck off, gun rights groups! I mean why do we even need gun rights groups? Guns have more rights than people do! I mean these kids are definitely better than you assholes!

Hundreds of thousands descended on Washington, D.C., on Saturday, in what is said to be the largest protest against gun violence in U.S. history.

Many of the students who took part in the March for Our Lives, in D.C. and around the country, said they were there to march for the ones who couldn’t.

“I’m here because I want things to change,” Brooke Harrison, a 14-year-old freshman at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, told ABC News’ “Nightline” at the march. “Three people in my class died, and 17 people in my school died. And I’m here to march for all of them.”


I can’t post all the top moments here because there are too many of them. But I’ll leave with this.

Parkland activists said they know their predominantly white faces help them get more attention.
"My school is about 25% black, but the way we're covered doesn't reflect that," Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School student David Hogg said the night before.
Several of the young speakers used their time to share the stage with people of color Saturday to remind people that gun violence affects all races.
"We recognize that Parkland received more attention because of its affluence," Jaclyn Corin, a survivor of the Parkland shooting, said in her speech. "But we share this stage today and forever with those communities who have always stared down the barrel of a gun."

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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Sigh… I don’t want to talk about this next story. It is making me want to throw up even just thinking about it, and quite frankly, I’m probably going to need to take a break so I can go take a cold shower after talking about this. So… the Stormy Daniels interview happened on 60 Minutes. And if you haven’t seen it, it’s pretty spectacular. Unfortunately my producer is telling me that we can’t find a clip of the full interview due to copyright violations. But we’ll give you a breakdown of the interview and the right wing’s predictable reaction to it. Starting with:

Daniels was never paid by the media for her Trump affair story
Daniels, whose legal name is Stephanie Clifford, told Cooper she was never paid the $15,000 the publication offered her to publish the story.

More details on the alleged threat
Daniels' attorney has repeatedly said she was threatened, but the details of the alleged threat have never been made public until now.
Daniels said Trump's personal attorney Michael Cohen threatened to sue shortly after the interview she did with the magazine. A few weeks later, she says, a man approached her in Las Vegas.


Gossip website sparked new interest in alleged affair
Before In Touch published its story, a gossip website got wind of Daniels' alleged tryst and published a few details. Four years later, when Trump ran for president, Daniels said she was contacted by various media outlets to tell her story.
"Suddenly, people are reaching out to me again, offering me money. Large amounts of money. Was I tempted? Yes -- I struggle with it. And then I get the call: 'I think I have the best deal for you,'" she recalled her attorney at the time saying.

Must come clean… dirt’s not coming off! So in case you’re wondering – yes a sitting president threatened the woman he was paying to have an affair with. Let’s let that sink in for a minute. I mean how much worse could this get?

Melania Trump has weighed in 60 Minutes‘ explosive interview with Stormy Daniels.

The first lady’s spokeswoman called the interview with Anderson Cooper “salacious gossip,” adding: “I’d like to remind people there’s a minor child who’s name should be kept out of news stories when at all possible.”

Twenty-two million viewers tuned in to 60 Minutes Sunday to hear Stormy Daniels’ story. It was the longtime newsmagazine’s biggest audience since a 2008 interview with President Obama and his wife, Michelle.

Following the interview, President Trump tweeted Monday morning that there was “so much fake news” circulating about him.

“Never been more voluminous or more inaccurate,” he tweeted Monday. “But through it all, our country is doing great!

Hey this is between you assholes, don’t go and drag America into this! And I mean it! Don’t make me turn this show around! And speaking of things that don’t belong, why did anyone ask Stock Market Bro Jim Cramer his opinion on anything?

The stock market was rising sharply early Monday in part because the Stormy Daniels interview on "60 Minutes" did not deliver a "knockout blow" to Donald Trump's presidency, according to CNBC's Jim Cramer.

Cramer said speculation that Daniels could show evidence about her alleged affair with Trump knocked a couple hundred points on the Dow Jones industrial average late Friday afternoon, two days before the interviewed aired.

"They didn't have a tape," Cramer said Monday on "Squawk on the Street." "When you saw no tape, what you did was this morning say, 'OK, let's go buying opportunity.'" He added the CBS interview with Daniels was probably not "as imperative on the stock market as people might have felt."

Last week, Daniels' attorney hinted that he may have a disc containing evidence about the alleged affair. During an interview Monday with NBC's "TODAY" show, her attorney, Michael Avenatti, said he is "not playing games" and will provide more information on his client's alleged affair with the president.

Yeah so that interview was so insane that the opinions of minor celebrities actually make the news because the actual story is too disturbing to report! I mean I may have to picture my parents having sex just to get that image out of my head! Yeah let that sink in! And then of course Trump got spanked with a cover of a magazine with his picture on it. He’s gone full narcissist! And you never go full narcissist!

Nobody was ever spanked with a more appropriate object than the one Stormy Daniels recalls employing on Donald Trump.

“He’s like, ‘have you seen my new magazine?’ Daniels recounted to Anderson Cooper on 60 Minutes of her encounter with Trump in 2006.

Some have suggested that the magazine was Forbes. But the timeline doesn't add up. The spanking took place in July 2006 and the Forbes magazine with Trump on the cover came out in September 2006, with a dateline of October 2006.

The only new magazine that Trump would have called his own at that time was the premiere issue of TRUMP magazine. It had just been produced under a licensing agreement with Trump in the way of other properties to which he lent his name and spoke of as if they were his, in this instance all the more so because he was a major shareholder in the publishing company.

He was, of course, on the cover.

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[font size="8"]The Trumper Games
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It’s time for another edition of:

Happy Trumper Games! Yes it’s time for the latest edition of the Trumper Games, my pretties! Mmmmmm…. Yes… Mmmmmm… yes… damn it Charlie, why must you bring me the cheap champagne again, I want the good stuff, damn it! So to give you an update on the games – last week, President Trump managed to eliminate not one but two tributes from the games. And the rules state that any tribute can be eliminated at any time for any reason. Just like last week – Tribute Tillerson was eliminated while he was on the toilet! So who was eliminated this week? It was a tribute from District 1 and guy who has a discount used furniture store named after him – H.R. McMaster!

President Trump has replaced Army Lt. Gen. H. R. McMaster with the ultra-hawk John Bolton as his national security adviser, effective April 9.

Although Mr. Bolton has held several senior positions in the State Department, he is presently a Fox News commentator and a senior fellow at the American Enterprise Institute. If General McMaster, with his military background, pragmatic leanings and truth-to-power credentials, couldn’t forge a systematic policymaking apparatus, Mr. Bolton isn’t likely to be able to either. To the extent that there is less discord between Mr. Trump and his national security adviser, it will only be because they share a strategic mind-set and are both intent on realizing it. This is a terrifying prospect.

General McMaster, a war hero and a true soldier-scholar, seemed to have the goods for shepherding Mr. Trump into a deliberative national security decision-making process that would curb his impetuousness and produce considered, coherent policy. His book “Dereliction of Duty” had famously challenged the conventional wisdom about decision-making during the Vietnam War by highlighting the politicization of military policy; observers assumed he would follow his own advice in the White House.

So, with that – the President eliminates another tribute! He eliminated a guy with actual military experience only to replace him with – a former tribute! Yes be sure to turn in next year when it’s the all star edition of the Trumper Games! Of course the wet dream of the Trump fanboy is to dismantle the United Nations and they might actually achieve that. And that’s scary.

President Trump’s selection of John Bolton to serve as his next national security adviser has generated alarm about what the move portends for U.S. foreign policy. The litany of concerns about Bolton includes his hawkish views on Iran and North Korea, his unshaken conviction that the Iraq War was good policy, evidence that he tried to intimidate intelligence analysts into agreeing with his conclusions, and reports that he harassed those who crossed him.

Bolton’s views on multilateral institutions and international law — and what he sees as their encroachments on national sovereignty — are at the heart of these concerns. Critics routinely reference his gibe that the U.N. headquarters building could lose 10 stories without any impact, as well as his contention that “there is no United Nations.”

But the image of Bolton, in part self-generated, as an inveterate unilateralist who has no use for the United Nations or multilateral cooperation requires some correction. Bolton’s record and worldview on that point are more complicated.

Oh but lighten up! I mean just because the President appointed a new tribute to lead us into a new era of death and destruction the likes of which have never been seen before , that doesn’t mean that we are going to war, does it?

2. But hawks may be less helpful for selling a new war.

A hawk like Bolton might have a more limited role in how others perceive a potential conflict. In research that will be published later this year, I used a survey experiment conducted on a sample of approximately 3,000 Americans to examine how different advisers’ statements about a hypothetical conflict affected public support for war and presidential approval.

I found that whether a hawkish adviser publicly supports or opposes a potential conflict affects both public support for war and public approval of the president. In general, if the president follows any adviser’s advice, approval goes up; if not, it goes down.

Oh that’s fierce!!! And damn it Charlie, my champagne doesn’t fill itself! So why is the appointment of John Bolton (R-Moustache) bad for this position? Well there’s many theories on that, my pretties! Most of which there’s some truth to but most of which, are, well, bullshit! We will keep an eye on the latest developments in the Trumper Games, but for now consider Tribute McMaster… eliminated!

In 2003, when George W. Bush was president, the White House undertook a new effort to get North Korea to give up its nuclear weapons program. It did so by working with four other countries—South Korea, China, Japan and Russia. These so-called six-party talks’ were a yearslong, often frustrating diplomatic effort, and in the middle of it, I sat down with a negotiator from one of the parties, a diplomat who had become one of my best sources in the region.

Normally, he was calm. But when I mentioned John Bolton, the former Bush administration official who had helped scuttle a previous nuclear agreement between the U.S. and Pyongyang, the diplomat’s equanimity evaporated. “John Bolton,” he spat, “is the reason North Korea has multiple nuclear weapons today.”

The diplomat was overstating his case. But the mere fact that he said it was revealing—especially now that President Donald Trump has appointed Bolton to be his national security adviser. The move, which becomes official in early April, will come roughly a month before one of the most audacious diplomatic gambits in American history: Trump’s agreement to meet with Kim Jong Un, the young leader of North Korea.

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[font size="8"]The NRA
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So you ever wonder how celebrities get their nicknames? Well this week one celebrity made it really obvious how he got his nickname. I’m of course talking about the rap group Run The Jewels. Which features two guys – El-P and Killer Mike. The latter is the subject of this next entry, and the backlash and blowback that he received from appearing on NRA TV has been well, the most insane thing that has happened in 2018. And it’s only March people!!!

One half of Run The Jewels, Killer Mike has taken to social media to clarify controversial points he made in an interview with the National Rifle Association of America.

The interview was released while marches against gun violence took place in US, and saw the rapper discuss his gun ownership stance while debating the marches and National Walkout Day.

“I told my kids on the school walkout, I love you, [but] if you walkout that school, walkout my house,” he said to NRATV.

“We are not a family that jumps on every single thing an ally of ours does because some stuff we just don’t agree with.”

Killer Mike also said he was “very pro-Second Amendment”.

“And before you say ‘What about the children,’ my daughter goes to Savannah State University. There was also a shooting on that campus. Talked to my wife and daughter after that, the decision was we’re gonna go to Savannah, she’s gonna get a gun and train more.”

Well at least we know how he earned the nickname Killer! But as you can imagine there’s more to this story as you can probably tell. I mean really when the whole country is marching against the NRA you don’t go on NRA TV!

But by Sunday evening, following an online outcry from fans and gun control advocates, Killer Mike issued an apology for his appearance on the show and said the NRA misused it "as a weapon" against Saturday's marches. Mike added that his appearance was intended to focus on gun ownership by black Americans. "I did an interview about black gun ownership in this era," Mike said in his statement. "That interview was used a week later to disparage a very noble campaign that I actually support ... I want to say first I'm sorry guys. I do support the March — and I support black people owning guns. It's possible to do both." The position isn't new for the rapper — a year ago, he appeared on the Tavis Smiley show to say the NRA has "had a value to me my entire life," and that he is a member of the organization. "I think that one million black men should go online and just get a year's membership, and see how you like it."

Killer Mike's partner in the duo Run The Jewels, El-P (otherwise known as Jaime Meline), initially commented on the NRA's stance against the marches, tweeting "they didn't want to be known, they wanted to be kids. And they've earned being heard in one of the hardest ways possible. No matter what you believe we all have to listen in a real way."

Oh come on Mike, did you really think you would be able to appear on NRA TV and *NOT* have them misquote you? I mean they could issue a new tape tomorrow and call it “Run The Jewels Live From Uranus!”. Thank you audience! Oh and don’t think they won’t disguise a poop joke in that title either, I mean they did support President Bone Spurs after all! Don’t worry Mike -we get it. We think people should have the right to protect themselves especially in this toxic political climate that we live in. At least they apologized for the interview, but Mike is not backing down on his stance. And you know what? We’re OK with that. NRA TV is really the evil ones here.

Run the Jewels member Killer Mike (AKA Michael Render) has apologized for giving an interview to the NRA in which he defended gun ownership and said he had discouraged his children from participating in school walkouts in protest against gun violence. The video interview ran online the same day as the nationwide March for Our Lives protest.

Killer Mike has now posted two new videos apologizing for the interview and its timing. “That interview was used a week later by NRATV to disparage a very noble campaign that I actually support,” he said. He apologized to the students who organized the rally. “I’m sorry that an interview I did about a minority – black people in this country – and gun rights was used as a weapon against you guys. That was unfair to you and it was wrong, and it disparaged some very noble work you’re doing.” He encouraged them to keep organizing: “Plot, plan, strategies, organize, and mobilize.”

Oh and by the way – if you think this was an isolated incident, Killer Mike wasn’t the only gun nut apologist shooting his mouth off this week. Yeah you can take that pun either way. Behind door #2 – a guy who actually was a victim of a mass shooting – Jesse Hughes of Eagles Of Death Metal!

Eagles of Death Metal frontman Jesse Hughes, who survived the 2015 Paris attacks, has lashed out at survivors of the Parkland, Florida, school massacre.

In a series of posts on Instagram, the singer labelled students who led the March for Our Lives protest on Saturday as "vile abusers of the dead".

Hughes also accused one of the students of "treason" and mocked their gun control campaign.

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[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Gather around my fair brothers and sisters! It’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened, and it is our weekly duty to remind you that the holiest among us are also the most full of:

So this week rather than talk to you about the usual nonsense that the Christian right has been up to, my fair congregation, because we can only tell the same joke 1,000 times before it gets old, we are instead going to tell you about a world of entertainment that you will soon be seeing more of. And if you think the Mercy Me bio picture “I Can Only Imagine” or other flicks like “The Shack” are anomalies, you ain’t seen nothing yet!

As Hollywood struggles with sexual harassment scandals and box-office woes, it could do worse than turn to God. For while religious movies have traditionally been considered a niche phenomenon, that assessment may need to be revised.

Last weekend I Can Only Imagine, a Christian-themed independent biopic, beat a series of studio-backed films to win the number three spot behind Black Panther and Tomb Raider. And as Easter approaches, films with Christian messages are experiencing an upswing not seen since Mel Gibson’s 2004 crucifixion drama The Passion of Christ.

I Can Only Imagine stars Dennis Quaid and was produced and directed by brothers Jon and Andy Erwin, the duo behind other faith-based hits such as Woodlawn, the story of a spiritual awakening among an Alabama high-school football team, starring Jon Voight and Sean Astin, and October Baby, an anti-abortion drama.


That did not impress film executives. Jon Erwin says he was told there “was no audience for a Christian music movie ... But everybody I knew – in the Christian world that we live in – knew and loved the song, so we just believed that there was an audience for this movie and that they would show up”. I Can Only Imagine was ultimately picked up by Roadside Attractions, maker of Manchester By The Sea, and Lionsgate. The distributors agreed to promote it as a general audience production. With a $25m box-office take so far, it is also showing Hollywood that Christians can make consistent, repeat filmgoers. Audience polling found that 79% said they planned to pay to see the movie again.

Even our good LAWRD is down with YOLO! But really, what does it takes to please Hollywood executives? $25 million in 7 days is pretty damn good for an independent bio picture! Maybe that’s why Hollywood hates them! But apparently the faith based film industry is trying some new things to attract audiences! How about, I don’t know, making good movies? Remember Ben Hur in the 1960s? Try making movies like that!

Christians are an appealing market for Hollywood, which is looking for ways to expand the cinema audience as digital competition causes long-term declines in theatrical attendance. The movie business is routinely criticized for overlooking the values of religious Americans, and faith-based filmmaking was seen as a way to rebut that narrative and attract an audience that usually doesn't go to the movies.

Facing a wearied audience, some filmmakers are trying to adapt by expanding into more subgenres, including romances, sports dramas, comedies and documentaries.

"We're developing beyond just the genre of sermon-on-film," said Bill Reeves, head of Tennessee-based WTA Group, a marketing firm that specializes in faith-based media. "We're trying to answer the question of 'What else is out there?'"

Others are putting their faith in Bible-based stories with big-name stars. On March 23, Affirm Films will release "Paul, Apostle of Christ," which blends scripture and fiction to tell the story of the apostle's last days. The new movie features actor Jim Caviezel in his first biblical role since he played Jesus in "The Passion of the Christ."

That’s not exactly what we are looking for, oh LAWRD! But in the world of faith based movies, well, producers are looking for anything that channels our lord and savior, creator of all that is good and holy, for ways to attract an audience. Because GREED is a sin!!!!!! And it is one of the most egregious of SINS!!!! It even says so in the good book!

As the market for Christian movies becomes more crowded, studios must work harder to attract devout audiences.

“Because there have been so many movies made for this audience, they have become much more discerning,” said Howard Cohen, co-founder of Roadside Attractions, distributor of “I Can Only Imagine.”

“And they will choose the ones that not only have a strong Christian message but are bigger-feeling.”

“I Can Only Imagine,” released nationally on March 16, exceeded opening-weekend expectations at the box office, reaping $17.1 million in ticket sales ($14 million was projected).

Now if they could just get a book about a holy super hero published and create the multiverse surrounding it, they would be set! I mean after all the Holy Bible is the original shared universe! They had 12 different characters and each one had their own stories, then they had the Last Supper super finale! Come on movie producers, get on that! For it is not that easy, my fair congregation! But of course the revenues have surpassed expectations! Because of course they did! But now my fair congregation, here’s where the idea of the good Christian faith-based film can and will go wrong! It will make the wrong people famous! And blasphemy is a sin!!! One of the most egregious of sins!!!

Mark Taylor is a former firefighter who claims that while he was watching Fox News back in 2011, God personally told him that Donald Trump would become president of the United States. Taylor initially thought that meant that Trump would challenge President Obama when he ran for re-election in 2012, but when that didn’t happen, Taylor realized that was because it was God’s plan to keep Obama in office for a second term so that Americans could “build a righteous anger” necessary to elect Trump and thereby save the world.

When Trump was elected president in 2016, Taylor penned a book titled “The Trump Prophecies: The Astonishing True Story Of The Man Who Saw Tomorrow… And What He Says Is Coming Next” and quickly made a name for himself as a modem-day prophet and radical conspiracy theorist.

In the last year, Taylor has claimed that God told him that Trump will replace five members of the Supreme Court, three of whom will be removed from the bench after being indicted for corruption, and that two of the five currently living former presidents will die as punishment for criticizing Trump, while the other three will be imprisoned and possibly executed for treason.

Taylor, who claims that Trump will release the cures for cancer and Alzheimer’s disease during his second term in office and asserted that God made journalist Megyn Kelly ill as a “warning shot” to all those who would dare to criticize Trump, believes that thousands of elite satanic pedophiles have been secretly arrested and that we will soon start seeing them prosecuted via military tribunals that will “make Nuremberg look like a cakewalk.” Taylor actually predicted that we’d see mass arrests in February, but the fact that that obviously didn’t happen doesn’t seem to have harmed his standing as a “prophet” in any way.

Yes because even JAYSUS doesn’t know what to say regarding how stupid Brother Mark is!!! I hope that is the take away you get from today’s sermon – Mark Taylor is insane! Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

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[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: The Greatest Toy Store There Was
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It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is:

We now need some proper music to get us in the mood for this report:

If you were a child of the late 80s and early 90s, that jingle is forever burned into your brain. You most likely loved going into a Toys R Us store. Or as the great comedy writer Dave Barry once referred to them as “Gee, Toys Sure R Expensive!”. But this week with the announcement that the chain is closing and liquidating most, if not all, of its’ stores , we want to ask: why? Why is this beloved chain going under? Well, just like Disneyland – the answer is unparalleled corporate greed.

Toys R Us, the toy superstore that became a dream factory for kids nationwide, said in a U.S. Bankruptcy Court filing Thursday that it must liquidate, a move that would close 735 stores, leave 33,000 people without jobs and wrap up a 70-year run for a once-beloved holiday shopping spot.

The chain, whose chipper mascot Geoffrey the giraffe beckoned families to stores, said poor holiday sales caused its final demise. Online sales had undercut the popularity of its stores, and rampant discounting from the likes of Walmart and Target shaved away profits.

Saddled with enormous debt and piling up losses, the chain said it had no choice but to shut down. "The stark reality is that the (chain is) projected to run out of cash in the U.S. in May," it said in its bankruptcy filing.

No not quite yet. Especially when you consider that the closure of one of the biggest toy store chains in history could have a colossal ripple effect throughout the entire industry. Once heavy hitters such as Crayola:

Children’s arts products maker Crayola LLC has accused Toys ‘R’ Us Inc of coloring outside the lines in its dealings with its suppliers, saying the bankrupt toy-store chain kept ordering merchandise despite knowing it would not avoid liquidation.

Crayola, a subsidiary of Hallmark Cards, objected in court papers filed on Friday to aspects of the Toys ‘R’ Us plan for winding down and argued they would shield the retailer from any liability from misconduct.


Or how about venerable toy companies Hasbro and Mattel – makers of Barbie, how are they going to fare with this news?

The U.S. toy industry was taken by surprise when the country’s largest independent toy seller, Toys "R" Us filed for bankruptcy in September last year. The company recently confirmed that it is liquidating its entire U.S. operations (735 Toys "R" Us and Babies "R" Us stores). Liquidation sales started on Mar 23.

Toys "R" Us failed to keep up with fast changing customer preferences and shift of demand toward alternative entertainment modes like video games, MP3 players, tablets, smartphones and other electronic devices.

It simply could not compete on price and shopping convenience with giants like Amazon and Walmart. To make matters worse, the company was burdened with a $5 billion debt load, much of which originated from its 2005 deal to go private. All these developments gradually pushed it toward bankruptcy.

Here’s where we would slow down that clip if we could. It’s as if corporate greed is throwing our favorite toys out the window. So what happens when a store files for liquidation? What happens?

The sales are starting at Toys "R" Us.

The liquidation sales started Friday, and the company said it will offer shoppers "deep discounts and promotions."

The iconic toy giant announced last week that it will shut or sell all of its 735 US stores after a 70-year run.

Here's everything deal-seeking shoppers need to know:

How long do I have to use my Toys "R" Us gift card?

Stores will honor gift cards through April 21.

If you have an Endless Earnings e-gift card, you also have through April 21 to use it.

Customers can not return a gift card for cash.

What happens to my rewards?

You can no longer use your loyalty rewards coupons toward purchases. You might still see these points accrue in your account, but you won't be able to redeem them.

So with those pressing questions out of the way – are there any toy stores left in America? Yes, there is one and its’ business is actually booming.

When Toys R’ Us announced plans to close all 735 of its U.S. stores this month, it wasn’t exactly a surprise.

The gravitational pull of online shopping has decimated many iconic brick and mortar brands, and toy stores are no exception. Amazon’s toy sales grew about 12% last year, according to market research firm One Click Retail, while declining foot traffic has threatened to topple every time-honored kids company from American Girl to the once-invincible Lego.

In an era of smartphone shopping and same-day delivery, one decades-old toy chain has managed to weather the storm. And it’s a peculiar one.

In February, Build-A-Bear announced its fourth straight year of profitability. As retail giants like Claire’s, The Limited, and Payless shutter stores by the hundreds, the company has expanded its physical footprint by 12% over the last five years. And while Toys R’ Us closed its doors with $5 billion in debt, Build-A-Bear is debt-free. So what does Build-A-Bear have that Toys R’ Us doesn’t?

So one retail chain is thriving while a major one is suffering. You might be asking “where did all their money go?”. Well let’s investigate further.

A bankruptcy judge has granted struggling retailer Toys R Us permission to pay millions of dollars in bonuses to executives after the company argued it was necessary to motivate its top brass during the critical holiday shopping season.

Judge Keith Phillips ruled the company can dole out $14 million in incentives to its top 17 executives. A caveat: fiscal year earnings must first reach $550 million. Executives could receive even more if earnings reach $641 million, but the company's lawyer Joshua Sussberg said that target would be "incredibly hard to achieve," reports Reuters.

In September, Toys R Us — the largest toy retailer in the United States — filed for bankruptcy. But it stressed at the time that its approximately 1,600 stores worldwide would remain open and operate as usual. In a statement, CEO Dave Brandon said, "our objective is to work with our debtholders and other creditors to restructure the $5 billion of long-term debt on our balance sheet."

So there you have it. The company is in dire financial straits but it can still afford to pay its’ executives huge salaries and bonuses. Just like the hundreds of other failed retail chains that have come before it. That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

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[font size="8"]Alex Jones
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Sigh. Our good buddy Alex Jones just can’t seem to know when to shut up. I mean did you know that we’re in a war right now? And did you know that the powers that be have a list? You know – kind of like a really fucked up Santa Claus – they know who’s naughty and nice but that doesn’t matter – a whole lot of us are going to get nuked! And if you ever dare turn on Infowars, you know that Alex cranked the crazy up way past 11 this week:

Alex Jones, the conspiracy theorist behind the Infowars outlet, warned listeners that global elites are evacuating to remote locations because of an impending “world war” and “world depression” that will kill most people.

On today’s episode of “The Alex Jones Show,” Jones cited reports that members of Washington institutions like the CIA have supposedly taken an interest in a network of doomsday shelters in West Virginia. Jones said he had spoken with someone who worked for Hollywood director James Cameron who told him that Cameron had said that billionaires are planning to evacuate to New Zealand.

“People that aren’t billionaires, they’re moving to Montana and Wyoming. I know a bunch of prominent Texas families that are evacuating Texas. Just evacuating, and they just say, ‘Word is, can’t save the country,’” Jones said.

“So, remember this, leftists—all of you crazy people that want to burn it all down, and you Antifa meth heads and all of you—if Trump can’t stabilize the country, and if we don’t make alliances and peace deals, and the world economy keeps going in this direction with population and all the crises and all the countries that have bio-weapons, there’s going to be a big world war and there’s going to be worldwide depression,” Jones said. “And a lot of you aren’t going to make it out of it.”


Yeah probably! I think I saw the Antifa Meth Heads at the Troubadour last week, not the best band in the world, I would say. And you think our resident pastor is crazy? Well wait until you get a load of Infowars’ resident pastor Rodney Howard Brown!

Pastor Rodney Howard-Browne, who placed hands on President Trump in prayer last year, joined Alex Jones on Infowars yesterday and urged Christians to “get radical” because only “divine intervention” can save America from the evil globalists Jones and Browne believe are working to destroy the world.

Yesterday, Browne joined Jones to promote his new book, “The Killing of Uncle Sam,” and discuss what he believed to be current threats against Christians and against President Trump. Jones said that one threat churches and religious groups have faced is social media censorship, claiming that social media companies have been removing posts because they featured references to Jesus and other biblical figures.

“The body of Christ has to stand up. First, we have to pray. Last night, we had a three-hour prayer meeting at the church praying exactly over these things and really asking God for divine intervention. And the church has to get radical. The people of God have to get radical,” Browne said.

Browne then alluded to the recent string of bombings killing people in Austin, Texas, and suggested that the bombings were being used by anarchist terrorists who are attempting to bring “everything under control.”

Yes, yes it does! And what is Alex Jones’ obsession with overweight gay women? I don’t want to say he has a fetish or anything, but yeah, he probably does have a fetish!

Gavin McInnes, a CRTV host that also leads a bizarre boys club, told Infowars host Alex Jones that their children will not have to deal with “annoying, childless, lesbian feminists because they’re all going to be gone.”

McInnes joined Jones on Infowars today to explain why he believes far-right activists like himself have a superior ideology to modern liberalism. Part of that superiority, he argued, includes the fact that McInnes and others who occupy the same space in the far-right, constantly urge their audiences to start families and have children.

“Their stupid idea is not to breed and not to have families. Our stupid idea is to breed like rats. And they are going to be extinct. Our children are not going to have to deal with these annoying, childless, lesbian feminists because they’re all going to be gone. They’re the dodo birds of Western civilization,” McInnes said.

Jones took a moment to clarify that he and his wife have “nothing against lesbians,” before making clear exactly what he had against lesbians by asking McInnes: “Why are lesbians so uptight?”

Why are lesbians so uptight? To use an old Seinfeld quote – they probably look at guys like you and go “that’s why I’m not heterosexual!”. And to add to his already bizarre theory on globalism, Alex offered this:

During today’s episode of “The Alex Jones Show,” Jones claimed that “the globalists that had sold this country out and thought they were God are flipping out right now” in reaction to how much Trump has supposedly been improving industries in the United States. He complained that the media was “bitching and complaining” that Trump would destroy the economy, despite the fact that “we didn’t have anything left” and that industry is “all pouring back in now” to the country.

“Doesn’t mean they’re not going to strike back, doesn’t mean it might not be too late, but they were involved in deindustrialization, post-industrial era Agenda 21, Agenda 2030—it’s a plan. It’s public. Trump has read it,” Jones said, referring to United Nations plans regarding global sustainable development practices that have inspired many right-wing conspiracy theories. “Trump knew all of this before I was ever on air.”

Jones went on to claim that Trump’s relationship with Roy Cohn, a shady lawyer who played an instrumental role with former Sen.Joe McCarthy ginning up public hysteria during the Red Scare in the 1950s, was proof that Trump was “the opposite of a Russian agent.”

Jones screamed: “What does that tell you? The globalists are crapping themselves. He’s the opposite of a Russian agent. That’s why they’re so scared. Everything he does is for the country. Everything he does is the classic default of what you do.”

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[font size="8"]Rosanne Premiere

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I was originally going to talk about gun nut apologists and their reaction to the March, but I didn’t like the entry so we’re going to do this instead! You know what people? Don’t call it a comeback! Thank you sound effects guy! So we’re going to talk about the premiere of the TV show Roseanne. And it sparked quite a bit of controversy for one reason alone. That is – Roseanne’s character is a bonafied Trump supporter of the Infowars conspiracy theory variety! Or as they called him on the show – “he who shall not be named!”.

Roseanne Conner is back in primetime, and that thing you’ve been hearing so much about — that choice she made in the last presidential election — has been confirmed and explained.

Roseanne did indeed cast her vote for Donald Trump, or rather, He Who Must Not Be Named, because no one actually says his name throughout the episode. Ditto She Who Must Not Be Named, the pantsuited opponent whom Roseanne assumes sister Jackie voted for, which led to a year-long rift during which the siblings and best friends haven’t spoken to each other.

This part of the Roseanne revival already had some fans vowing not to tune in. How could that liberal, underdog-championing, working-class heroine Roseanne Conner have changed so dramatically that she would turn her back on all she claimed to believe in, all she claimed to be about, to vote … another way? When she and Jackie finally agree to a détente to talk about their beef, Roseanne explains her choice in a way that almost certainly won’t change anyone’s mind, but nevertheless lays down a point: You can choose to get past it, or at least to keep talking, no matter how much you continue to disagree.

That is a good point! So Roseanne is a Trump supporter. And you know in this climate of “Hollywood doesn’t understand our views” well conservatives might want to reconsider that talking point. And as we saw from that Bill Maher clip in the beginning – the people really taking it out on Hollywood are Hollywood rejects! But both sides weren’t left out of the picture.

Roseanne returned to primetime after a 21 year hiatus and immediately tackled the topic of political divisiveness that many American families can relate to. While the show never mentioned specific names, it is implied that Roseanne and Dan are proud Donald Trump supporters. While Roseanne's sister Jackie is anti-Trump.

The premiere episode was centered around Roseanne and Jackie being at odds with each other, in fact they've barely spoken since the 2016 election. But since they are family, they make an attempt to be civil to each other.

The two sister threw barbs at each other. Jackie brought Russian flavored dressing to a family dinner. Roseanne responded by asking Jackie if she'd like to take a knee during grace.

While the two sisters never saw eye-to-eye on each other's political beliefs, they overlooked them for the sake of family. Jackie said, " "I guess I didn't mean to imply that you're some right-wing jackass. I should have tried to understand why you voted the crazy way that you did." Roseanne responded, "And I should have understood that, you know, you want the government to give everybody free health care 'cause you're a good-hearted person who can't do simple math."

Wait, so… how does doing basic math have anything to do with government sponsored health care? I mean who is that joke targeting? You know – for when you thought Fraser was too intellectual! So what does Roseanne’s ex, Tom Arnold, think of the show?

When THR asked me to review the new Roseanne reboot, I promised objectivity. But, of course, I'd been the audience warm-up guy for the Roseanne pilot in 1988 and worked my way up on the show from writer to producer. In fact, by the time Roseanne fired me in 1994 — destroying the trophy case in my office, canceling my credit cards and promising I'd never work in show business again — I'd been executive producing and playing Arnie for a few years. So you can see why these delightful memories would make it hard not to be prejudiced.

The world is different now than when Roseanne and I went to Bill Clinton’s inauguration in 1992, and a lot has changed since the show went off the air in 1997. When I read on Twitter that there was going to be a Roseanne reboot, I was happy for Roseanne and the other actors, but I also knew the new show's success would rest on one thing: Who will Roseanne Conner be in 2018? Because today's Roseanne Barr is more polarizing than ever. No longer a feminist-pacifist voice for the working folks, she's now a far-right Trump-loving troll who's gone hard against liberals and Hillary supporters and even #MeToo women. That is not the Roseanne Barr I knew, but that's OK so long as that's not the Roseanne Conner she brings back to TV.

OK so of course like most things happening in 2018, here’s where it gets weird. Of course you know that Roseanne is a crazy Trump loving fiend who regularly spouts Infowars talking points and QAnon conspiracy theories. And when she gets called out on it guess what? Denial!

Barr being a big Trump supporter, Kimmel reminded her she used to support Hillary Clinton, but became “down on her” and even accused her of being a murderer on Twitter, “didn’t you?”

“I did not!” Barr screeched. “I deleted it!”

But she acknowledged, “I had some disagreement with her foreign policy.”

Because “she had one,” Goodman snarked, largely staying out of the melee.

Barr asked, like she meant it to sting, if Kimmel had supported Clinton during the election.

“Never mind her!” Kimmel shot back, having none of that. “How about the Capt. Whacko we’ve got running the country here?!”

Barr insisted she has not changed over the year, but “you all moved — you all went so f*ckin far out you lost everyone.”

Really Roseanne? Jimmy lost everyone? Is that why he’s one of the highest rated hosts in late night television? But of course the divide has even perplexed her original fans of the show! Because why wouldn’t it?

Tonight is the big night America has been waiting for! After 21 years, Roseanne is returning to the small screen — and in a way, we can all thank President Donald Trump for the reboot.

Roseanne Barr has been a fixture in pop culture for decades, but has largely stayed out of the spotlight since Roseanne ended its nine-season run in in 1997. That all changed during the 2016 presidential election, when Barr came out in support of presidential candidate Donald Trump.

“I think we would be so lucky if Trump won,” she told the Hollywood Reporter several months before the election. “Because then it wouldn’t be Hillary.”

Since those initial viral comments, Barr has gone on to praise and defend Trump continuously, including this week, while promoting the upcoming Roseanne premiere with John Goodman on Jimmy Kimmel Live. After arguing with Kimmel about the president’s controversial administration, Barr said, “No matter who we voted for, we don’t want to see our president fail.”

Considering Barr’s personal political beliefs, there was little surprise when news broke that some of the iconic Conner family on the show will be portrayed as Trump supporters. “It’s just realistic,” the 65-year-old actress said during the Television Critics Association press tour in January. “It was working-class people who elected Trump.”

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[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
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Oh you know what time it is? It’s time for this!

Of course you know by now that people are people and people are dumb. It’s been a while since we have done one of these. I want to start with this story out of Seattle, Washington featuring two jaw-droppingly stupid criminals who attempted to walk out of a Costco and, well… let’s just say bad things happen.

SEATTLE (KGO) -- Thieves with armloads of stolen laptops and vacuum cleaners literally walked straight into the arms of police.

It happened at a Costco in Seattle last week and it was caught on video.

Officers responded to reports of shoplifting in progress. They arrested a woman who was sitting in a car pulled up to the store's emergency fire doors.

Police say it was the getaway car.

Officers were waiting when a man and a woman loaded down with stolen property kicked the doors open. The suspects tried to make a run for it but police nabbed them.

How about this – what happens when you try to teach a lesson to someone? Here’s one woman from Montana (surprisingly not Florida) who attempted to teach a lesson that backfired big time! Where is J Walter Weatherman from Arrested Development when you need him?

A woman drank a half bottle of whiskey, drove her car through a medical marijuana provider storefront and broke additional windows with a sledgehammer because she was upset the business was closed, prosecutors say.

Lisa Christine Walter, 37, appeared in Yellowstone County Justice Court on Monday on a felony criminal mischief charge and aggravated driving under the influence second offense, a misdemeanor. Justice of the Peace David Carter set bond at $10,000.

Police were called to Grow World, at 3130 King Ave. W., on Friday at 9 a.m., according to charges. There they found Walter drinking from a measuring glass, with her blue Honda Civic driven partially through the front doors of the business.

All 10 of the front windows to the business had been broken, police said. There was a baseball bat sticking out of the rear passenger side window, a sledge hammer sitting on the front seat and a bottle of Jack Daniels in the rear of the car.


Next up we go to where else but Florida? Yes, the Sunshine State always knows how to bring the crazy extra hard. And this is a classic Florida Man story too – I mean you can diagram the first sentence of this story and you still won’t be able to fully comprehend it.

Two men are accused of breaking into the home of a man they both dated, stealing several items, then leaving spaghetti sauce boiling on the stove with a washcloth placed near the burner in an attempt to start a fire, according to the Volusia County Sheriff's Office.
Deputies went to the residence and saw a red Lincoln Navigator attempting to leave the area. A stop was conducted and the driver, 28-year-old John Silva, and passenger, Derrick Irving, told the deputy that they had just picked up some clothes from the victim's home, according to the affidavit.

The victim told News 6 that Irving was wearing a bull costume.

The deputy said she could see a marijuana grinder in the center console and a vacuum, window A/C unit, flat-screen television and heater in the back seat. An empty jar of Ragu spaghetti sauce was also on the passenger's seat, the report said.


Yes seriously – WTF. This almost kind of sounds like the plot from Hot Fuzz when they tried to destroy the guy’s house with bacon and beans. Only there wasn’t a bull costume involved. Next up – how about some hardcore pornogr